- 5/19/2025
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TVTranscript
00:0012 virgins are heading towards a paradise island to take part in a unique experiment.
00:13The word virgin, people see it as a joke. It's quite obsessing.
00:20I'm 23, still a virgin. I feel like there's something wrong with me.
00:25In a world where sex is everywhere.
00:28Thank God.
00:28Terrified, absolutely terrified.
00:31The truth is surprising. There are more adult virgins than ever.
00:36Being a young adult in this day and age, it's difficult.
00:39Social media.
00:40Dating apps.
00:41Influencers.
00:41TV shows.
00:42Porn.
00:43Porn.
00:43Porn.
00:44Porn is everywhere.
00:45Are you self-conscious about our genitals touching each other?
00:48Now?
00:49Yeah.
00:51This radical retreat is offering a very hands-on solution.
00:56Oh, hell.
00:57She's a miracle worker.
00:59Oh, God, yes.
01:00Overseen by a group of experts.
01:02Yeah.
01:03Like that?
01:04I like that.
01:05Ready to do anything to help Britain's virgins.
01:09There's the clitoris. Do you have any questions?
01:13Lose the one thing.
01:16Don't make me nervous.
01:17They feel he's holding them back.
01:19I would love to have sex with you.
01:21I do feel like there's a barrier between me and sex.
01:23I want to lose my virginity.
01:25It's now or never.
01:28But when the moment arrives...
01:30Would you like to move to the bed?
01:32Who will be ready...
01:35I just don't want anyone to touch me.
01:37...to go all the way.
01:41You're so sexy.
01:42I feel so...
01:53Here they come.
01:55Can you imagine how scared they are?
01:59Aloha.
01:59Hi.
02:00Welcome.
02:01For the next two weeks...
02:03Welcome, my friend.
02:04...this experimental retreat will be home to 12 young people
02:07from all over the UK...
02:09Raj.
02:10Want a hug?
02:11Yeah, go on.
02:12...who desperately want help.
02:14Welcome.
02:15So good to meet you.
02:16Everyone's so spiritual.
02:19I could be a 40-year-old virgin.
02:21I feel like I'm on a really bad route right now
02:24and I need something to change.
02:26Hey, Tom, I'm Deva.
02:27Oh, nice to meet you.
02:28Do you need a hand down there?
02:29Yes, I will do.
02:30Cheers.
02:31I describe myself as nerd because I feel I look like one.
02:33The glasses, perhaps not the best physique.
02:36So if I can lose my virginity,
02:38that's one less thing for people to ridicule me over.
02:41Hi.
02:42They're here to learn.
02:44Hi.
02:46Would you like a hug?
02:47I'm all right, thank you.
02:48OK.
02:50From some of the world's most experienced experts
02:52on how to embrace intimacy.
02:54Oh, hello.
02:55Welcome.
02:57I just can't do touch.
02:59I don't know why.
03:00I've never had a girlfriend.
03:02My fear is that I'm always going to be a virgin.
03:05I'm like, what am I doing wrong?
03:08I've never been abroad before.
03:10So if anything, I've popped my blind virginity.
03:14Yay!
03:16My social life's non-existent.
03:17I've got two cats.
03:19I feed them.
03:20I look after them.
03:21But they attack me.
03:22But another loved me in their own way.
03:24But yeah, not very social.
03:29This is where you'll be staying.
03:32For the duration of their stay.
03:34Home sweet home.
03:35I mean, it's not quite my usual colour.
03:37They'll wear a retreat outfit.
03:39You know like prisoners who get out on good behaviour to go pick up litter?
03:43That's sort of the colour palette we're working with.
03:46So they can focus on themselves, not their image.
03:49Basic but comfy.
03:51I would like to walk away from the island with more self-confidence.
03:56Because when you see a lot of celebrities on Instagram,
04:00they just have everything so perfect.
04:02Comparing myself to people online,
04:04disrupting my self-esteem.
04:06And it's something that I've been struggling with for so long.
04:10It's so easy to say,
04:11don't worry about the way you look in the mirror.
04:14But then it is so hard to put that into action.
04:16I think once I'm more content with myself,
04:19I will then be able to live life.
04:23And losing my virginity would probably be my final goal.
04:34This is going to be your hangout zone.
04:36That looks fantastic.
04:38It's beautiful.
04:40Can't get over how clear the water is.
04:42Before the cast begins,
04:44the group have a chance to get to know each other at the hangout.
04:48Oh, hello.
04:49Hey, guys. You OK?
04:52I'm Taylor.
04:53Nice to meet you.
04:54Nice to meet you.
04:55I am bisexual.
04:57I do know what I'm interested in.
04:59But with boys and girls,
05:01the only experience I've had have been negative.
05:04You kind of feel like it's just you who's having this issue
05:07and nobody else is.
05:08Is that quite isolating?
05:09Yeah, it's very isolating, yeah.
05:15Yeah, sorry.
05:18Oh, hello.
05:20Hi, I'm Tom.
05:21I'm Zach.
05:22Zach, nice to meet you.
05:23Zach, how are you? OK?
05:24Very good, yeah.
05:26I went to university for three years,
05:29but I was depressed in many ways
05:32by the fact that I didn't have a job.
05:35I was depressed in many ways by the fact that I'm a virgin.
05:39I didn't get the degree I should have got.
05:41And ever since, I've been stuck doing jobs
05:44that I never really wanted to do.
05:48I'm tired of the person that I've become.
05:53It can't go on.
05:57The group sessions are where most of the touch stuff's going to be done.
06:00The thing I'm dreading is hugging.
06:01Did you not hug at the start?
06:03Nope.
06:04I shook the hands.
06:05I don't do hugs, yeah, shook the hands.
06:07Ah.
06:08And I would have been like, no.
06:08I jump in the water.
06:10No, I don't hug you.
06:12It's the therapy itself that scares me now.
06:15I'm just getting more and more tense.
06:19The virgins are clearly nervous about what lies ahead.
06:22And that's understandable.
06:24It's a course like no other.
06:26OK, good.
06:27Set up by groundbreaking sex therapists, Celeste and Danielle.
06:31Eyes closed.
06:33What's going to happen on this island is mind-blowing.
06:36Breathe.
06:38One in eight people at age 26 are still virgins in the UK.
06:42This is happening all over the world.
06:44Even the French are having less sex.
06:48With a team of international sex coaches
06:52trading different touch therapies,
06:55they'll help the group try to overcome their worries around virginity.
06:59Tucked away on the island are sexy therapy spaces
07:04and bedrooms where they can practice the art of intimacy.
07:09You can't really learn how to play a guitar from a book,
07:12and you can't learn how to give and receive pleasure by just talking about it.
07:16Sometimes the only way to help someone is to get physical.
07:22They don't know it yet,
07:23but each phase of the course will push them to their very limits.
07:29Woo!
07:32As they take their first steps to sexual confidence.
07:37Oh, I feel so good.
07:41Let's go.
07:44It's a process that starts now.
07:47Are they waiting for us on course?
07:49With the foundation of all sexual attraction.
07:52Welcome.
07:53Welcome.
07:56Desire.
08:00We're so excited to start our workshops today.
08:03And the first phase of this course is desire and letting shame go.
08:08Shame is very much attached to desire and turn-ons.
08:12And so much of shame melts away
08:14when people come together and start to talk about sex.
08:17Each of you need to have a space and a pillow.
08:21The first exercise will give Celeste and Danielle
08:24a clear idea of who in the group is the sexiest.
08:27A clear idea of who in the group is open to desire.
08:30Wonderful.
08:31Start by closing your eyes.
08:33And who may be resistant.
08:36Just listening to my voice.
08:39I'm going to start by taking a nice deep breath.
08:47I'm going to make lots of noise too, by the way.
08:50This may not be most people's idea of sex.
08:53But for virgins, Celeste and Danielle's research shows
08:57it's a great way to tune into your body.
09:00Breathwork is very powerful.
09:02We use breath to help people expand on sensations, release emotions.
09:08So breath is key.
09:11I'm going to up the speed of the breath.
09:20Okay, who is willing to make sound with me?
09:23Some are throwing themselves in.
09:28Wonderful, you're doing it, I love it.
09:30Good job.
09:32But others seem more sceptical.
09:35And for touch-phobic Jason,
09:40it's more than he can handle.
09:44It's amazing how much breath we need to take
09:46to warm up our body, to feel more.
09:49And get it in, yeah.
09:51Check your feet, yeah.
09:52I love this dance.
09:58We're going to raise our hands.
10:06Wonderful, it's great, okay.
10:08Celeste and Danielle move on to the next exercise.
10:11Start by pairing up.
10:13To teach them that before saying yes,
10:15you have to say yes to everything.
10:17To teach them that before saying yes,
10:19it's okay to say no.
10:22All right, so this exercise is about saying no.
10:26So one of you is going to ask the other person for three things.
10:30And then the other person is going to say no.
10:35Go on.
10:37I think I said it.
10:39Can I borrow 50 pounds?
10:41Oh, no.
10:43We need people to feel safe.
10:45If people don't feel safe, they won't feel safe to open up
10:49and start and try new things.
10:51Can I have a go on your golf cart?
10:52Absolutely not, no.
10:54Can I...
10:55I don't know what to say.
10:56When I'm around a member of the opposite sex, I'm very awkward.
10:59Can I point you in the face?
11:02No.
11:03I tend to say things without thinking.
11:05Can I throw you in the sea?
11:07No.
11:08I wish it was different.
11:09I'd love to be able to speak to a girl,
11:12keep a conversation,
11:13and go on a date.
11:16That's my kind of dream.
11:18Can I feed you to a lion?
11:21No.
11:22Why not a violent?
11:24Take a seat.
11:25Yeah, just sit and relax.
11:27The level of inexperience is clear.
11:29So Celeste and Danielle decide to test how the group reacts
11:32to intense intimacy.
11:34I want to give you a little demo of what you might get to.
11:37Tease your appetite a little bit.
11:40Andre?
11:41We call it up against the wall.
12:03Witnessing sexual desire for most of this group
12:06is clearly unsettling.
12:11Oh, okay.
12:27Wait, I actually want to get your first visceral response.
12:31It was like watching a sex scene with your parents,
12:32but times 100.
12:34Quite uncomfortable, to be honest, watching that.
12:36Yeah, it's normal to have any emotional response.
12:37So let yourself have any feelings.
12:39You want to laugh, laugh.
12:40If you want to cry, cry.
12:41It's all okay.
12:43This big insecurity that I have when it comes to my looks
12:47means I can't imagine that someone would want to be with me
12:50in any way.
12:52Where you're so stuck in this mindset
12:54that someone would be ashamed to walk down the street with you,
12:58it's like a never-ending cycle,
13:00like a roundabout that doesn't stop.
13:02When I was growing up,
13:03I would always get labeled as the duff,
13:05which is designated ugly fat friend.
13:09So I would always believe that I was ugly.
13:13So I think there's a lot that I need to work on.
13:20All right, we're going to come in a circle.
13:23Big round of applause.
13:24Woo!
13:25Woo!
13:25Woo!
13:26Woo!
13:28Thank you all.
13:29Bye.
13:30Bye.
13:32What have I got myself into?
13:34I feel like I'm in a cult.
13:36I'd be lying if I said it wasn't weird.
13:39They seem cultish.
13:40It just seems like they've got this island
13:42where they live in a completely different world.
13:45The up against the wall was interesting by the end.
13:49I'd love to be able to do that.
13:52I could not look after he kicked our legs apart.
13:54That was too aggressive.
13:55I think that's actually the most intimate
13:57I've ever seen people in person.
13:58Be in front of you.
14:02I don't think I was fully ready for that
14:05because I'm so shut off to that sort of world.
14:08I've never felt that sort of emotion.
14:11I've walked away feeling really overwhelmed.
14:13I'm a bit like brain boggled at the minute.
14:16The course has just begun
14:18and so far they've only had a taste
14:20of the unconventional methods ahead.
14:22The next workshop may be tougher
14:24and I may actually not be ready for that.
14:39Do you reckon there are dead bodies in the water?
14:41Do you reckon?
14:42Probably.
14:43It's halfway through day one on Virgin Island.
14:47Coming out as a virgin is very difficult
14:49because I think in this day and age
14:51people see it as such like a negative.
14:54For men we hide it if you're a virgin
14:58because mostly because how other men will see them.
15:00100% yeah.
15:01So I told someone in our office that I'm a virgin
15:04and everyone who comes in they tell everyone.
15:07I wish I was like smart enough to just say yeah.
15:09I've had lots of the sex.
15:14People have so much shame about being a virgin.
15:16I think between rom-coms and porn
15:19there's so much perfectionism that's put out there.
15:22Like it's so much pressure
15:24that they're just terrified to try anything at all.
15:27That's where we come in.
15:31Each step of the way
15:32the experts will share notes with each other about the process.
15:37When you did the up against the wall exercise
15:39she started crying.
15:40And after an emotional reaction during this morning's workshop
15:45their first concern is Emma.
15:47I could see her face.
15:48She was like really feeling it really intense.
15:50It was too much for her to see it really.
15:52She was like picturing herself in this situation
15:55and she got very overwhelmed.
15:57Like that was my sense.
16:00Every afternoon there are one-on-one sessions across the island.
16:04And first the experts want Emma to explore her boundaries
16:07around intimacy with Thomas.
16:11Going 23 years being single
16:13I've never had the experience of someone romantically touching me.
16:18If I ever got presented with the situation of sex
16:21I would worry that I could have a panic attack.
16:24Hello, ma.
16:25Hello, you OK?
16:27I've never masturbated
16:29and I've never experienced an orgasm.
16:31And I've never experienced an orgasm.
16:36There's no way that I could experience one other thing.
16:42I want to propose you a little game around touch.
16:46You just ask for the kind of touch you really like.
16:54What would make you happy to receive?
16:56It's not something that I'm like
16:57oh I really wish someone would touch me.
17:00Do you know what I mean? I don't think like that.
17:01Yeah.
17:03OK.
17:04Maybe, yeah, maybe you could touch my knee.
17:07OK.
17:10The idea is to test how Emma reacts to escalating touch.
17:16Do you want to try somewhere else
17:18where you feel that might be more like involved?
17:22Maybe if you try upper thigh.
17:31When it gets to this bit it gets a little bit like
17:35oh God, like what's going to happen sort of thing.
17:39It feels like you mean you have some...
17:41Fear.
17:43I feel like if you went around here
17:46I probably would have maybe had a panic attack.
17:51I did as much as I could
17:53and I pushed myself to my limits
17:55for the level that I'm currently at
17:57but I don't think I was fully ready for it.
18:00I feel quite drained.
18:02I feel a bit upset.
18:05Well, thank you so much Emma.
18:07Yeah, we'll just come with you.
18:10I feel she's kind of a bit stuck.
18:14Thank you, see you again.
18:15Take care, see you later, goodbye.
18:16She was going through it
18:18but really one toe at a time, one step at a time.
18:23Emma's struggling.
18:25Hello Charlotte.
18:27Do you want a hug?
18:28No, I'm all right, thank you.
18:30And as some of the others experience
18:31their first taste of touch therapy...
18:34What's coming up for you?
18:36I know it's a simple thing
18:38but like I feel like I'm not doing a bad job.
18:41It's clear Emma's not the only one finding it difficult.
18:45I think you're right up close.
18:47Yeah.
18:48You had over 100, how intimate would you describe it?
18:50Yeah, probably like 90.
18:52I think that's what we call it.
18:53Don't step backwards, please.
19:00But booking the trend is Zach.
19:02Oh, come on in, I'm so excited.
19:04I am as well.
19:05After throwing himself into the first workshop
19:08the experts want to test how far Zach is ready to go.
19:12I've always wanted to be accepted,
19:14I've always wanted to be liked by others.
19:16It's something I felt I haven't had
19:18at many points in my life.
19:20I know you feel also like a failure around sexuality, right?
19:24Good time, yeah.
19:25It's just so hard to let go of that.
19:27Of course.
19:28I don't know if I can.
19:29No, no, no.
19:30Can I just have a tissue, please?
19:33Wipe these away.
19:34I'm going to put them in the box.
19:36Sex was a taboo.
19:39My family never, even to this day, talks about it.
19:43I grew up seeing my dad only once a week
19:47and he never talked about it
19:49so I can't get tips or ask someone,
19:52hey, how do I attract a woman?
19:54It feels like I should have figured all that out a long time ago.
19:59Also, I don't feel attractive or handsome.
20:04I assume the way that other people see me,
20:08it's negative, I think, generally.
20:12I want to play a fantasy with you.
20:15Really?
20:17Danielle believes her methods can give Zach the confidence he needs.
20:22How close?
20:24That's all right, yeah.
20:25I'm just going to kiss you gently
20:29and I want you to see if you can really take it in, OK?
20:33I'm just going to kiss you gently
20:37and I want you to see if you can really take it in, OK?
21:01How does that feel?
21:02Good.
21:09Oh, now I start to feel your arousal.
21:13Oh my God, this is so sexy.
21:17Her hands-on technique works by giving Zach a physical experience.
21:21I just love how you bite your lip.
21:23A form of somatic or touch therapy.
21:33Somatic therapy believes that just talking with someone is not going to be sufficient
21:38and we really need to help people through the body
21:41in order to really create some sort of change.
21:51No one's ever said that I'm sexy, no one.
21:54I'm feeling fuzzy all over.
21:59In that session alone, I've done things that I've been craving for a long time.
22:04Go conquer the world.
22:06I'm making tons of progress.
22:10Back in the hangout, the others are keen to find out more.
22:15Where have you been?
22:16The one-to-one session.
22:17Was it good?
22:19It's pretty intense.
22:20A lot of neck kissing.
22:21Do you need a minute?
22:23Yeah.
22:24The first day at the retreat has shown just how many issues the group has
22:28around sex, shame and intimacy.
22:33And as the sun sets on the island...
22:35I don't know if I want to see them staring at us.
22:38Oh, I can just sense dread.
22:40Celeste and Danielle have one last exercise.
22:43Hello.
22:46So, you each brought an item that is in your bag.
22:51So, you each brought an item that is about letting go of some piece of shame
22:55that you're ready to be done with.
22:57And we can't wait to hear your stories.
23:01They'll each share a story that represents a past failure,
23:04in the hope that they can move on.
23:07I'll go.
23:13My item's about my first year uni.
23:16I've ended up failing to my flatmate.
23:19So, I decided to get her a necklace.
23:22But before I could give it to her, she made it very clear
23:25we were never going to be anything.
23:28I didn't handle the rejection too well.
23:30I just beat myself up every day about it,
23:33in terms of how I ended things with her.
23:40It's my first ever Rubik's Cube.
23:43And the way I treat a lot of relationships is as a puzzle.
23:47I think that gets in the way.
23:51This is a gift that one of my...
23:53Well, my only ex got me.
23:55I didn't really think it meant that much,
23:57and I should have thrown it out a while ago.
24:02This is a hoodie from a time in my life when I...
24:08I just felt, like, really worthless,
24:11and I didn't see a future for myself.
24:13This is actually a diary from one of my only,
24:15kind of, date-in relationships
24:18that I felt was too much for me at the time.
24:22And it's something I really need to let go of.
24:30That one's a bit more literal.
24:33I have expired condoms.
24:37My mate gave these to me before a house party.
24:40My mate gave these to me before a house party,
24:43and he said, you're definitely going to need these.
24:45I didn't.
24:46I think if anything signifies sexual failure,
24:48it's having condoms go out of date.
24:54So, mine is a childhood photo.
24:57I felt quite difficult to express emotions
25:00while I was this age.
25:01I was more of a people pleaser,
25:03into the point where I'd end up really damaging myself,
25:06because I was more worried about their feelings
25:09rather than my own.
25:10But I want to let go of the people-pleasing aspects.
25:14If you don't love yourself,
25:15how the hell are you going to love anyone else?
25:18Thank you so much.
25:21You're amazing.
25:21OK, well, you made us cry.
25:24This was really deep and really meaningful,
25:28and we're just so proud of you.
25:30Amazed, actually, amazed.
25:32Yeah.
25:39How did you feel?
25:41I wanted to, you know, say goodbye to it.
25:43It's like pulling a Band-Aid off.
25:46I walked into it a bit sceptical on how I was going to feel.
25:50I'm trying to open myself up to learning new things,
25:53but I don't know whether I've achieved a lot,
25:57and I'm not looking forward to what tomorrow may hold.
26:01Jeez, Louise.
26:04It is an intense day, a very long day.
26:07Tensions are only going to get higher.
26:09Yeah.
26:18Stormy night last night.
26:20Stormy weather, I think, means upheaval, change.
26:26Morning.
26:29It's day two at the retreat.
26:31A smoothie?
26:32It's strawberry milk.
26:35The morning after last night's shame exercise.
26:38How are you guys feeling about the presentation last night?
26:41I wasn't expecting to be quite as emotional.
26:43Yeah, I didn't really enjoy it.
26:48Now, the experts hope the next exercise will move from shame back to desire.
26:54We want to see what motivates them around sex,
26:58and there's nothing more explicit than writing your erotic story.
27:02The storm clouds are circling,
27:04but it's not just the weather the group are bracing themselves for.
27:09Hello.
27:09Hello.
27:10How are you?
27:10Are you all right?
27:11Hello, Danielle.
27:12OK.
27:13Your next exercise, write your hottest sexual fantasy, OK?
27:22Oh, my.
27:24It's a fantasy, so let yourself go with it.
27:27Don't hold back, OK?
27:29Ciao, Danielle.
27:30Ciao.
27:33Wonderful to see you.
27:34Oh, my God.
27:36Does she say hottest or hardest?
27:38Hottest.
27:39Oh, I'm cross.
27:40I want to go inside.
27:43Is anyone feeling a bit sick about writing this?
27:46I certainly expect 12 virgins to struggle with writing an erotic story.
27:51I don't think they will have much of a clue
27:53about what they want in terms of sexuality,
27:55but, you know, we shall see.
27:57This needs to have backing music over it,
27:59and it's like bow chicka wow wow.
28:04Celeste and Danielle want to test how in touch they are with their desires.
28:10So far, I've got a couple of openings.
28:14It was a dark and stormy night, obviously a classic.
28:17Confident after his one-on-one session with Danielle yesterday,
28:21Zach is quick off the mark.
28:23Never before has he been so surprised is my other one.
28:28I think I'll try that.
28:30Oh!
28:31But for others, revealing their innermost desires doesn't come easy.
28:3650 Shades of Grey and stuff, I've never read that.
28:39I'm not erotic, so I have no idea what to write.
28:41Like, right now, writing, I've bought a lottery ticket.
28:45It's hard to say what my dream would be in a sexual manner
28:49when I haven't really been open to having a sexual manner,
28:53if that makes sense.
28:55I'm trying to open myself up to, you know,
28:58trying to open myself up to learning new things,
29:01but it's difficult to do that when you're not happy with yourself.
29:08I haven't read anything.
29:11I am a senior parliamentary researcher for an MP in Parliament.
29:15I deal with the public, and I'm actually in a public speakers club.
29:19I'm perfectly comfortable doing that,
29:21but I thought having sex with just one person,
29:22for whatever reason, that just really is quite frightening.
29:26God, you've written a novel!
29:27Once you get started, it's a lot easier, right?
29:30Once you've got an idea...
29:30I don't even know how I'd write more on the page, like, trust you.
29:33Just pick a subject and just start from there, honestly.
29:36Yeah, I suppose.
29:37And then just make it real sexy, right?
29:40Oh, that's not me.
29:41Whatever floats your boat, you know?
29:43You're way more confident than I am.
29:45Yeah, I just... Yeah, it's quite scary.
29:53Oh, God, we're in the amphitheatre.
29:55Stories written, the experts will watch to see who's embracing...
30:00Welcome back, everyone.
30:01Morning.
30:03..and who's hiding their true desires.
30:09So, we're going to invite you to share your fantasy with us.
30:14I'm not ready for this.
30:16Anyone want to volunteer to go first?
30:20Take the leap.
30:22It can be so empowering.
30:27I'll go first, yeah?
30:32So, my fantasy.
30:34It starts with me walking toward my castle.
30:37As I enter, I am greeted by Sofia Vergara,
30:40the Latino lady from Modern Family.
30:42She would say how great my castle is and how my wife is a lucky lady.
30:46I would then proceed to my master bedroom
30:48due to hearing my name being called by an almost angelic voice.
30:52My wife, brackets, not married,
30:53as I don't want to lose the castle in a divorce.
30:57The sex is unbelievable and the best way to describe it
30:59is for you to imagine your very own fantasy
31:01and multiply the pleasure by ten.
31:07As more of the group step up...
31:10We reach a bit of land covered in rocks.
31:12Fuck, there's our luggage.
31:13Hope she doesn't find my cum socks.
31:16..some are struggling to reveal their desires.
31:19Instead, they're hiding behind humour.
31:22I didn't even get a chance to write anything,
31:24cos I'd write a block.
31:25But, you know, I thought about it and I'd say I'd be with
31:27either Angelina Jolie or Anne Hathaway,
31:29watching Villa win the Champions League.
31:30You know, she'd be just wearing a Villa top and that'd be that.
31:35Others...
31:36A sigh, a kiss, hot air against skin,
31:38fingers dancing across one another.
31:40The both of us would enjoy the experience fully.
31:42..seem happier to share their real fantasies and feelings.
31:46Aphrodite requires tributes made to her,
31:49an act of physical love, by a devoted and naive nymph.
31:54We'd head back to my house and she'd sort of lead me upstairs.
31:58You know, I'd pick her up, take her down on the bed.
32:02I'd probably do something before we had sex,
32:05I don't know what I'm doing.
32:06LAUGHTER
32:08We'd just naturally start kissing and she'd kiss me.
32:11We'd start kissing and she'd, like, bite my lip, pull down on it.
32:16Erm, yeah, that's what it would be like.
32:18CHEERING
32:21Let's go.
32:22Go on, Zak.
32:24But it's Zak who has the most explicit story of all.
32:28The shadow descended from the top of the hill,
32:31upon which stood a towering warrior.
32:33He removed his helmet to expose his fiery hair.
32:36A maiden stood forth.
32:38Remove your sandals, she commanded.
32:40Surgingly, he knelt down.
32:42In that moment, she lifted her skirt and forced his head between her knees.
32:46She let out a moan of pure ecstasy.
32:48She removed her dress, exposing her breast and naked body.
32:51The warrior entered her many times, her bodies becoming one.
32:54CHEERING
32:57Thank you, guys.
32:58That's just the first chapter.
33:01Anyone else feeling brave?
33:03OK.
33:04Yesterday's session with Thomas revealed the extent of Emma's issues
33:08around intimacy.
33:09What kind of erotic story could Ophemarine say?
33:12HE CLEARS THROAT
33:14HE EXHALES
33:15OK.
33:20My ideal fantasy would be a person coming into my life, unexpected...
33:30..a genuine, honest, supportive and kind male,
33:35with no expectation of me, who has a genuine big heart,
33:39who has love for the world,
33:41to treat others how we wish to be treated,
33:43and to be happy and have the opportunities to grow together.
33:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
33:49You were fantastic. Really amazing, right, Celeste?
33:52That was phenomenal. Phenomenal! Phenomenal!
33:56Gather your stuff. Thank you so much. Thank you.
33:59Thank you. Thank you.
34:02I really like jokes.
34:04When I'm awkward, I'm trying to make jokes.
34:07It's how I deal with awkward situations and things that I don't really know what to do.
34:11It was a defence mechanism for me.
34:13Everyone seemed to laugh at it, in likelihood, so it went better than I thought.
34:17I felt really good, actually.
34:19The story I was telling showed a lot about myself,
34:22and, you know, I can see what experiences I want to have now.
34:27It was actually a little bit of a confidence boost,
34:29pushing myself and having the courage to go up there and do that sort of thing.
34:35It made me feel a lot better afterwards.
34:41A lot of people say to me,
34:42oh, you look young, I think I'm like 18, 19, 20.
34:45But then I always say, oh, it's cos I never had a boyfriend,
34:48so I haven't been stressed out.
34:49You've never had a boyfriend? No, no.
34:53After a successful workshop...
34:56..the dynamics between the girls and boys seemed to be shifting.
35:00He definitely seemed like one of the most confident of all of us,
35:03I'd say. Thank you.
35:05I've worked very hard to be this confident.
35:08I, er...
35:10I think you're really pretty. Thank you.
35:15I don't want to be in the sun for too long. OK.
35:17It was nice having that chat with you.
35:21Do you think Ben likes me?
35:23I've not noticed him being off of you or anyone else.
35:26No, it's just... I think he likes me, likes me.
35:28Oh, like that way? Oh, OK. Yeah. I don't know.
35:31While sparks fly between Ben and Charlotte...
35:36..not everyone is finding island life quite so easy.
35:42I think Jason needs a lot of, like, basic,
35:44this is how you do this, this is how you do this.
35:47It just... It's going to take time for him to feel the empowerment
35:50around touching other people, I think.
35:53Weirdly enough, my sex education, because I'd moved school,
35:56I'd missed the sex education.
35:58My sex education, because I'd moved school,
36:00I'd missed the sex ed week.
36:02So, basically, safe parks, my sex education.
36:05I've never touched a condom.
36:07The only thing I could know about women and that, I mean, stuff,
36:09would be on TV, on the internet, that kind of thing.
36:13If it was a game, I'm level one.
36:15That's interesting.
36:17I'd love to be able to level off, in a way.
36:19Sounded like a virgin explaining that. Oh, God.
36:23Come on in.
36:23So, the experts have planned a session
36:25on the basics of touch with Celeste.
36:29I've never really been able to be a touchy-feely person.
36:31Yeah. My family's like that, though.
36:33Like, my mum, she's never been a touchy-huggy person.
36:35But I know she loves me, I love her, but we can't do hugs.
36:38It's just not in our nature.
36:40I want to try putting my hand on top of your hand
36:43and see how that feels more...
36:45More intimate. Exactly.
36:47So, I could scooch to you.
36:49After this morning's workshop, Celeste wants to learn more
36:52about the real Jason behind the humour.
36:54Let's take some steps, you know? Yeah.
36:57And we can see, like, do you like putting your hand on mine?
36:59Do you like me putting my hand on yours, for example?
37:02So, you want to start with, like, just... Touch?
37:04Yeah, just put it on there. Like that? Yeah.
37:06Is it OK? Like, does the sensation feel good?
37:09It's OK, yeah. Yeah, all right.
37:12OK. So, can we try it where I put my hand on your hand?
37:15OK, yeah.
37:20OK.
37:21I feel like, because it's happening to me, it's, like...
37:24A little overwhelming? Yeah.
37:26Yeah. Yeah.
37:28Feeling uncomfortable receiving touch.
37:31When I work in, like, offices and stuff,
37:33I'm a bit worried that I'm a bit too firm with handshakes.
37:35Mm-hm.
37:36Jason takes matters into his own hands.
37:40Right. How about that?
37:43That feels good. Is that OK?
37:46I would even, like, let our palms touch a little bit more.
37:50OK. Like that?
37:52Do you feel, like, more like that kind of touch? Yeah.
37:55On safer territory...
37:58I feel sort of limp.
37:59You can give a little bit more pressure.
38:00OK, one more? Yeah, let's do one more.
38:02..Jason's flying.
38:03Like that?
38:04That was beautiful!
38:06Success.
38:07I was shitting myself because I had no idea what I was in for.
38:10Right. Right?
38:12But I think it's just getting more intimate with touch.
38:15I want to be improved and I want to be cured.
38:26Who wants a butt plug?
38:28I don't want to touch it.
38:29I don't think this has been inside...
38:31I don't know if it's been inside, only one.
38:33To encourage the group to broaden their sexual horizons...
38:36If I had more butt plugs, I'd be, like, Wolverine.
38:39..the experts have handed over a box of sex toys...
38:43Oh, these are fun!
38:45If I took your butt and you fart enough poo out,
38:47could you actually, like, blow it out?
38:50..and left them to explore...
38:52Who wants to be tied up?
38:54You know, you'd be in a bed and this would be tied to, like, a thingy?
38:57It would just help reinforce for me,
38:59when I have sex, it's going to be vanilla.
39:01It's vanilla sex for me.
39:03I'm going to leave you like that now.
39:05Charlotte!
39:11Who wants the feather?
39:12Yeah.
39:13How does it feel?
39:15It makes me feel like I'm being struck by chicken.
39:17Chicken!
39:19I want to lose my virginity on the retreat.
39:21All of the shame and the self-criticisms
39:24that come with being a virgin,
39:25my hope would be that afterwards, that would be gone,
39:28because you're not anymore,
39:29you don't have to put this label on yourself anymore.
39:36Hello. Hello.
39:38So far, Zak has adapted quickly to the cause.
39:41Comfortable with hugs?
39:42Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah.
39:44Zak is starting to stand up for himself.
39:47He's got a lot of confidence in himself.
39:50He's starting to stand taller.
39:52He's more confident.
39:54Please have a seat.
39:56And after our last session,
39:58I think he's ready for most advanced therapy.
40:01Working with a surrogate partner.
40:04A highly trained therapist able to have sex with a client.
40:08Today, I'm here to give you the introduction
40:11into surrogate partner therapy,
40:14what my role is, what Kat's role is,
40:17and a little bit about how this process works.
40:20Surrogate partner therapy has been around for quite a while,
40:24and it involves a therapist, a client,
40:27and a surrogate partner.
40:29It starts pretty slow with clothes on,
40:31embodiment exercises,
40:32just while we're kind of getting used to each other,
40:34and I can learn what you like, and vice versa.
40:37The surrogate is helping them explore
40:39what it feels like to take your clothes off with someone,
40:43what it feels like to touch someone in a neurotic way,
40:47and can go all the way to a full sexual experience.
40:52As you're comfortable with,
40:53we'll move to more organic encounters.
40:56Kissing, oral intercourse.
40:58It will eventually feel like
41:00just practicing different sexual skills.
41:02That's the gist, yeah.
41:03Cool.
41:04Yeah.
41:05Got it.
41:06This is a container for you to practice a relationship,
41:10and so I am a licensed mental health clinician.
41:14You will be working with me
41:16with regards to any emotions that come up,
41:18and that's my side of the street.
41:20Got it.
41:21I'm gonna let the two of you
41:22have the remainder of the session.
41:23All right, I will see you guys soon.
41:25Take care.
41:26Bye.
41:28Is there anything you want to talk about
41:30before we move to some body work?
41:34I don't think so, no.
41:35Okay.
41:36I'm good.
41:37I'm gonna have you lie down.
41:39So I'm gonna touch you first,
41:41and I'm only gonna touch your arm,
41:43and I'm gonna use my hands, my arms,
41:46my face, and my hair, if that's okay?
41:48Yeah.
41:55I think it's really important to teach people
41:57how to have sex.
41:59Teaching really basic relationship skills.
42:03When clothes come off, things get more erotic.
42:06Helping people be human again,
42:08it makes me want to do my job.
42:13While sex is the ultimate aim,
42:15Zach must build a connection with Kat
42:17before getting to that level.
42:28How was that?
42:30It was good.
42:31I was tingly.
42:32In a good way.
42:33Yeah.
42:34Are you ready to switch?
42:36Let's go.
42:47A surrogate partner bond.
42:49I'm gonna make sure you're feeling what feels good.
42:55Takes time to nurture, like any relationship.
42:58I think we're done.
43:00You're done?
43:01Yeah, yeah.
43:05What came up just then that made you feel like stopping?
43:10I think, you know, touching your arms is great.
43:12It feels amazing.
43:13It's just, obviously, I want more.
43:15Oh, okay.
43:16But it's a process, you know,
43:18like that I wouldn't do more than that
43:19on a first session with anybody.
43:21Yeah.
43:22The speed at which you feel like you're
43:24touching your partner's arm is really important.
43:26With anybody?
43:27Yeah.
43:28The speed of the surrogate program
43:30doesn't seem to be moving fast enough for Zach.
43:33So how far are you wanting to go
43:34with surrogate partner therapy?
43:36I would like to go all the way.
43:37I would love to have sex with you.
43:39You know, that's why I came here, really.
43:41Yeah.
43:43It's hard to connect with someone you just met
43:44telling you, hey, I'm your surrogate.
43:46You will be eventually, maybe,
43:48if you want, having sex with me.
43:49So let's stand up.
43:52Let's just shake it off.
43:53Right, do you think I'll be able to lose my virginity?
43:56You know, have sex with Kat eventually?
43:59I would like to.
44:06How was it?
44:07Yeah, so we were doing arm touching,
44:09like, it was intense.
44:10Like, I didn't realise, like,
44:11I would have that strong of a reaction, to be honest.
44:14You know, maybe I'll lose my virginity very soon.
44:16But, yeah, very positive experience, I think.
44:24Ready, guys?
44:26Oh, down here was a big fire.
44:28After two days at the retreat,
44:30the first phase of the course is drawing to a close.
44:34Shame bonfire is a culmination of everything
44:37that we've done in the first phase.
44:40It's a chance for them to get rid of their shame items
44:43from yesterday and move on.
44:50We're going to call you up one at a time
44:52to let these old stories about yourself
44:54and these old ways of being and thinking go.
44:57And I am so delighted for you.
45:00Okay.
45:03Are you ready to let it go?
45:04Yes.
45:05Let it go!
45:07Let it go!
45:08Let it go!
45:09Woo!
45:12Let it go!
45:13The act of burning something is the act of letting go
45:16and saying, I can change now.
45:19Ready?
45:20Let it go!
45:22It felt really good to be able to release
45:25all my feelings into the fire.
45:27I feel a lot more confident.
45:29It's like a whole refresh of emotions.
45:32Let it go!
45:34Let it go!
45:36Let it go!
45:38I was stuck in a rut.
45:39I was stuck in a way of thinking,
45:41and I think this is my opportunity now
45:43to really change that.
45:47But I'm keen to fill in more of the gaps.
45:49Woo-hoo!
45:50Let it go!
45:52Let it go!
45:54Next time.
45:55You're quite attractive, so I mean, you know.
45:57Things heat up on the touch phase of the course.
46:01There's another animal here with you on the srug.
46:05Oh.
46:07It was like watching a porno.
46:10As emotions bubble over.
46:11I just don't want anyone to touch me.
46:14Let's just have one minute.
46:19When things turn physical.
46:22I can't touch you, bro.
46:23You can't?
46:23No.
46:27Oh, yeah.
46:52Yeah.
46:54Yeah.
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