MJTV: MJ Exposes Fester’s Box of Crap

Beasley Digital

4/17/2025

Transcript

00:00Ladies and gentlemen, it is time for Fester's Box of Crap.

00:07Alright, let's go.

00:07This box of needs.

00:09It's not, first of all, it's not crap.

00:11It's stuff I genuinely need.

00:13And I would prefer, I'll ask you guys one more time, as your friend, don't go through

00:18my box of crap.

00:19I've never heard this tone from Fester.

00:21Usually he's testy and loud.

00:22You're trying to really play on our sympathies.

00:24Alright, let me think about this.

00:25Ask me one more time.

00:27Maybe you shouldn't.

00:28Do not go through the box.

00:30Uh, no.

00:31Alright, so are we...

00:32That's that.

00:33Alright.

00:34Coop, are we rolling this on MJTV?

00:36We are.

00:37It's going to be up later on our website.

00:38Alright, MJTV, and every day we record certain segments and we make the video available.

00:44We have one, two...

00:48What do we have, four cameras in here?

00:48We have one camera focused on each member of the show.

00:51So, and then Coop's got a video switcher.

00:53So, folks, it's MJTV, which we rolled out, I don't know, a couple of weeks ago, like a

00:58soft launch.

00:59Uh, we're going to get really serious about MJTV.

01:02A little more me on camera, Coop.

01:03I want my MJTV.

01:07That extra syllable really works.

01:08You like that?

01:08It's smooth, isn't it?

01:10Alright, so Froggy found...

01:12Where was this?

01:13Was it like under the desk?

01:14It's like, yeah, it was like in his little area.

01:17I guess he reaches in there often to pick stuff out.

01:20I don't know why you don't just put it in a desk.

01:22I mean, it's weird.

01:23This is Fester's box of crap.

01:26It's in a copy machine, multi-purpose paper, letter-sized white, 92 brightness, 5,000 sheets

01:34box that copy machine paper comes in.

01:36It's a really durable box.

01:38Hang on a minute.

01:38Let me...

01:39Oh, my gosh.

01:41You're going to have to go through it, like, fast.

01:42Hang on a minute.

01:43I got to show this box to MJTV.

01:45Folks, this video is going to be available for you to watch later on on MJMorningShow.com.

01:49So, MJTV is on MJMorningShow.com.

01:53Alright.

01:54We're not going to have time to go through this whole box, but I need, like, another bin

02:00here to throw this stuff in.

02:01Did you bring that box in all in one box, or has stuff trickled into the box?

02:07Let's go through this.

02:08Yeah, you got to go through the randomness.

02:10Let's not go through this.

02:11I'm going to ask you one more time.

02:12Could you please not go through the box?

02:13Don't go through the box.

02:14I'm going through the box.

02:15Alright.

02:16First, item number one.

02:17Yes.

02:17A 500-piece puzzle?

02:24What the fuck?

02:25What?

02:26That's what you're doing when you leave the room.

02:27I enjoy puzzles.

02:28I enjoy puzzles.

02:29This is a little puzzle.

02:31It's a puzzle.

02:32If I ever find myself at the radio station with some time to kill.

02:34This is, wait a minute.

02:35It's from Puzzle Bug Hot Dogs and Burger Stand Puzzle.

02:39It is literally a picture of a hot dog and burger stand, like, at a carnival.

02:43And it's a puzzle.

02:45Yeah.

02:45Why do you have this?

02:47If I ever want to put a puzzle together, I have a puzzle.

02:50So whimsical.

02:51An unopened bag of Pennsylvania Penny Sticks mini pretzels.

02:56Those are really good.

02:57Those are really good.

02:57And I'm going to have those in a minute.

02:59You can enjoy them.

02:59This is the largest vitamin.

03:06This is the largest vitamin container I've ever seen.

03:09Take one every morning.

03:10What kind of vitamins?

03:11This is Centrum Silver Men 50 Plus.

03:15Dude, you're 40-something.

03:16Well, I'm closer to 50 than this.

03:19My age is in the 40s, but my actual body age is like 100.

03:23He's like a dog.

03:25400 tablets.

03:26See, that's funny.

03:27I take children's vitamins for the opposite reason.

03:28Oh, my God.

03:30What is in here?

03:31You've got to dig a little deeper there.

03:32Oh, my God.

03:33What is this?

03:35Okay, stop.

03:36Don't open that.

03:37What?

03:37Don't open that.

03:39Hang on a minute.

03:39I don't know what this is.

03:41This isn't a baggie.

03:42What is this?

03:42You're not opening it.

03:43I'm opening it.

03:44I'm just opening it.

03:46Oh, my God.

03:49Why are those in there?

03:50Why do you have boxer shorts?

03:52Are you afraid you're going to soil yourself at work so you have a spare pair of underwear?

03:56All right, dude, I'm not afraid of it, but it's a realistic possibility.

03:59Is that like mom saying, hey, make sure you have clean underwear on.

04:02You never know when you're going to be in an accident.

04:03Clean underwear on.

04:04Are those tighty-whities?

04:05Oh, my.

04:06No.

04:06They're boxer briefs.

04:07Look at these things.

04:08Oh, they're boxers.

04:09Guys, you never know when you need a clean pair of drawers.

04:12I could give this to the Boy Scouts.

04:13I could use this as a tent.

04:15For real.

04:16Look at that.

04:16God, why do you have underwear at work?

04:19You never know when you need clean drawers at work.

04:23You never know.

04:24Can I borrow that?

04:24We're fumigating the house this weekend.

04:26Oh, my God.

04:27What the hell else is in here?

04:28Please stop going through the box.

04:30Why do you...

04:30Go deep.

04:32There's a couple weapons in there.

04:33Paint measures.

04:34Yeah.

04:34What the hell is this?

04:36All right, that is the coolest thing I use that all the time.

04:39He's got a giant Himalayan...

04:42Rock salt?

04:43It's a pink salt grinder.

04:45Okay, hold on.

04:45That's pink salt, garlic powder, and red pepper flakes in one.

04:49It actually is amazing.

04:50The randomness is bewildering.

04:51Here's a speed stick deodorant.

04:54I bought that.

04:54That's good.

04:54I bought that.

04:55That makes sense.

04:56I got that.

04:56Dollar Tree.

04:57Clear mid-crest mouthwash.

04:59Yeah, occasionally.

05:00You still brush your teeth here?

05:02Yes.

05:02Oh, my God.

05:03I've got Little Greek Restaurant Sea Salt in here.

05:06What's up with the salt?

05:08The pink Himalayan one I bought, the other one I stole from Little Greek.

05:11I've got a box of Pop Weaver Extra Butter Popcorn.

05:15Of course it's extra butter.

05:17Well, the best of the kind.

05:18A lot of food related things.

05:20It's a box of needs.

05:21You get clogged up?

05:22I got packets of Betta Fiber.

05:24Well, after all that popcorn, you'll need it.

05:26You never know when you need it.

05:28It's a box of needs.

05:30And then you've got the underwear.

05:31Betta Fiber Fiber Drink Mix packets are in here.

05:34Yeah, the underwear is...

05:35It's all coming together now.

05:36Why do you need ace bandages?

05:39There's an ace bandage roll in here.

05:41What if I sprained my ankle here at work?

05:43We use that for the fall concert series.

05:44Folks, we're going through Fester's Bank.

05:46In six months, we've been back.

05:48This is what's in the office.

05:50You've got to go to the bottom layer.

05:51Go to the bottom.

05:52The smaller items are kind of entertaining.

05:55I got Winnie the Pooh honey in here.

05:57It's actually really good, honey.

05:58What is that?

05:58It was a track dance.

05:59That's really good, honey.

06:00Oh, my God.

06:01So much food.

06:02A little nubby screwdriver.

06:04Do you have a screwdriver?

06:07Yes, I have one.

06:08It's in my box of needs.

06:09Gold Bond chafing cream?

06:11What are you...

06:11Oh, God.

06:13It's a lot of friction.

06:14What are you, chafed down there?

06:16Are you applying this at work?

06:18We're learning a lot about you.

06:20Gold Bond chafing cream?

06:21Sometime during commercial breaks, you know I'm gone.

06:22What the hell?

06:25That's not even like...

06:26You haven't even put a dent in it.

06:27It'll take me...

06:28My kids have these when they were four years old.

06:31He's got go-go squeeze apple sauce packets in here.

06:35That's the strawberry flavor.

06:37That's the best.

06:38God.

06:38It is.

06:39He needs energy.

06:40The strawberry flavor is the best.

06:41It'll take me two days to go through this box.

06:44Is the buck knife still in there?

06:46I haven't even scratched the surface on this.

06:48I mean, a lot of this stuff is a knock.

06:50I think I have like...

06:51Do I have post-it notes in there still?

06:52MJ, you gotta display it all.

06:55Box cutter.

06:56Box cutter, very important.

06:58Lighter.

06:58Colgate toothpaste.

06:59Right.

07:00A yarmulke?

07:01What is this?

07:02That is a...

07:03I don't know.

07:04That is not a yarmulke.

07:06That is for my coffee mug on the desk.

07:08I thought it was a loofah.

07:09All right.

07:09I gotta stop.

07:10You gotta take a picture.

07:11You gotta display it all out so everybody can see everything.

07:13There's a buck knife in here.

07:15Oh, my God.

07:16All right.

07:16We gotta take a break.

07:17All right.

07:18We're gonna lay all this out.

07:19We're gonna put a picture.

07:19Plus, the video's going up on MJTV on MJMorningShow.com.

07:23You don't need to do all this.

07:24Unbelievable.

07:25Bust open those pretzels.

07:26It's the end.

MJTV: MJ Exposes Fester’s Box of Crap

Category

Transcript

Recommended