Creepy Funeral Song

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about an e-mail from a 20-year-old female mortician/embalmer who is standing up for the "normal" people in that profession and the show doesn't buy it.

Transcript

00:00a mortician reached out to us yeah big fan of the show she says she's a female

00:08mortician slash embalmer i prepare the phrase for the afterlife she says it makes me laugh

00:18hearing you guys talk about how creepy we must be you are you know it uh she says i'm in my

00:25mid-20s and i find everyone around my age in the profession to be pretty normal as well

00:30but i have had some bad experiences with the older generations in funeral service

00:36some things more severe than others i do work with one older man who insists everybody needs to be

00:44packed pack it up with what is the question newspapers no wait till you are we going to

00:53fill you up with what a crazy song that is a really weird song she says for reference now

01:02sometimes bodies do leak out of orifices even after embalming but pretty rarely so to be safe

01:09we always pack the nasal cavity with cotton but that's it for most embalmers that's the only thing

01:15they pack but this man i work with she says this old guy will insist almost every female needs to be

01:22packed down there as well if i don't fill her up with a cotton ball i just don't think it's safe

01:33one in the rectum and one in the that

01:39two in her nostril and one in her throat

01:45two for her ears and a hug goodbye

01:50you're creepy

01:56just a hug goodbye no kiss that's the song they used to remember all their process

02:00yeah exactly i wrote a little song to help you remember what you need to do

02:07it's playing while they're doing about her eyes and put little cotton

02:12okay now i was complaining about this to a co-worker

02:20when he told me about a time that he came downstairs to find him packing a female deceased

02:26without gloves on i was horrified i just like the feel that's all it's about packing you so you don't drip

02:36one and two three and four

02:45i'll check your bandages put in some more

02:53oh

02:55she says all my co-workers they're creepy i'm i'm sorry there's something wrong with you and maybe

03:01you're 20 and you're okay right now that's all i'm thinking about is her like

03:05what how do you why why like what how do you do this what made you do it

03:10it's odd she says all my co-workers and i have complained about this guy to our boss but nothing

03:15gets done she says it's unfortunate so many inappropriate creepy people are allowed to keep

03:20their jobs but as you can imagine hard to find there's not a line out the door for people wanting

03:24to become funeral directors yeah people like him though give morticians a bad name it's like any

03:31other profession there's always some weirdos some tailors touch your penis some crossfit gym

03:35owners record you for some reason in the funeral profession though the odd weirdo has set the

03:40stereotype just wanted to let you know most of us aren't like that whether chuck believes me or not

03:46i don't well i think you're fine right now yeah but something inside is waiting to come out

03:54give yourself 10 years 10 years of your friends coming into the place getting packed

04:07getting burned all right oh my god oh my god you are just creepier and creepier i do i say this

04:18every time though i do know some normal like funeral workers yeah i don't know any i i know some that

04:25you on the outside look normal but have photos of stuff and this girl doesn't have photos so not

04:33only does this woman say that most of us aren't like that she said thankfully we actually aren't

04:36undateable i'm with someone now but i found most of my first dates actually were pretty interested

04:40and positive about my job she says also thanks for the laughs i do 99 of my listening while working

04:46in the prep room and it does make my days better yeah i need something to lighten it up in there you

04:50know for sure staring at a dead body i mean i really i i don't i it doesn't make any sense to me

04:58it's like just i i mean for me it's like the same level as somebody that could be a doctor

05:03or something and work with that and separate themselves from oh i think being a doctor is

05:09way better with an arm cut off or something yeah i think it's way more normal to be a doctor

05:14at least they're alive yeah first sometimes true i mean well yeah you could see them at the end but

05:21then like but as a doctor you're like well i tried to save them yeah you're not prepping their body

05:26now you're like wash and clean make sure you're spotless let's do a little bit of eyebrows for you

05:35eyeshadow here and a bit of lipstick now let me pack your vagina oh my god i love the end i don't

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