Green v. Baby

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a baby who threw up on a woman's purse during a flight and the debate of who should be held responsible unveils Andy's hatred of babies.

Transcript

00:00Here's a crazy story, a couple on a flight with their son recently, there was a lot of

00:12turbulence and the bouncing caused the baby to vomit all over himself, his parents, and

00:19people seated nearby.

00:20Oh, great.

00:22Now, unfortunately for mom and dad, a baby boy's barf landed smack dab on the purse of

00:26the woman behind them.

00:27To make matters worse, it was a designer bag, a Louis Vuitton bag.

00:32They got an email from the woman stating the bag couldn't be properly cleaned of the vomit

00:37and smell, and they needed to replace it.

00:40The mother spoke to the local news because she doesn't believe they're responsible for

00:44it.

00:45Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:46Should they replace the woman's $1,100 designer bag?

00:52Absolutely.

00:53Is it on them?

00:54I think it is.

00:55I mean, I can't believe I'm going to say that I think it is, but it is.

00:59I mean, if I had a laptop and your baby puked on it, I'd expect you to buy me a new laptop.

01:07Yeah.

01:08So, and I know it was just a little.

01:10I mean, is there anything this woman can do?

01:13I know the right thing to do.

01:15I can sue you.

01:16I can sue you for it.

01:17I can be sued for it.

01:19Yes, I believe I can sue you in small claims court.

01:21I think you'd win.

01:22And I think I'd probably win.

01:24I think you should win.

01:25Do you sue my baby?

01:26I sue your baby's ass.

01:29I mean, because I didn't puke on it.

01:31My baby puked on it.

01:32I know.

01:32Is it my responsibility because it's my baby?

01:34Because you brought a baby on a plane.

01:35Yeah.

01:36Yeah.

01:38I'll sue you if your baby just pukes on my $50 jeans.

01:41You can take him to court.

01:46That's a people's court, I want to be.

01:48I mean, I know.

01:49I just hate babies, too.

01:53Who likes a baby?

01:54I think that's what your passion is.

01:56The whole baby thing.

01:56It's just hilarious.

01:58Your hatred of babies.

02:00Because really, it's coming down to this.

02:02It's coming down to, can you blame the parents for a baby's puke?

02:08Can you blame a parent for the baby puking?

02:10That's what it's coming down to.

02:12And Andy's passion is, hell yes, you blame the parents for the baby puking.

02:18Right.

02:19I mean, you can't take the baby to court.

02:20It's got no assets.

02:21Exactly.

02:22You know.

02:24Your Honor, this is bullcrap.

02:29I have an $1,100 purse.

02:33Man purse.

02:34This is my $1,100 Louis Vuitton bag.

02:37And this little demon spawn is the defendant.

02:41It's a baby.

02:43Cute, adorable little baby.

02:45I move for the baby to pay.

02:47And I move for...

02:48I don't think that baby should be allowed to fly for the rest of its life.

02:56See what I mean?

02:57You can't talk to this thing.

02:59I hate this baby.

03:03Let's get some justice here.

03:05Listen to it.

03:05There's nothing cute about that at all.

03:09Big ol' baby.

03:11He's throwing up right now.

03:15See?

03:15Disgusting.

03:16Baby.

03:17People scored Andy versus baby.

03:20Andy v.

03:20Baby.

03:21Yeah.

03:21I like it.

03:22I'm reminded of...

03:23Green versus baby.

03:24Green v.

03:25Baby.

03:27Oh, let's sue that baby's ass.

03:29Mike, you're on with Dave and Chuck the Freak.

03:30And I think that if, you know, parents, as well as parents, you know, if our baby starts

03:34to puke, we kind of attend to that pretty quick.

03:37So I'm just curious if this was like, you know, Reagan from The Exorcist.

03:40It sounds like this little baby was just going crazy.

03:44You know the only thing I can think of, dude?

03:46Because I was thinking, I'm like, how could I not contain it?

03:48If I...

03:48You know how sometimes babies, you'll set them up and they're looking over the seat behind

03:51them just to entertain them over there?

03:53Oh, yeah.

03:53They could have been facing that way and started puking.

03:56I'll tell you what, too.

03:57You aim your baby at me on a plane.

03:59Hey!

04:00Hey!

04:00It's like you're turning that goddamn baby around.

04:02It's like a gun.

04:03You turn that goddamn weird ass baby around.

04:06It's weird baby face.

04:08Just turn it around.

04:09Come on, Andy.

04:10No, but honestly, it's me like me pointing a gun around.

04:13Oh, you're ridiculous.

04:14It's a baby face.

04:15Both ends of that thing are loaded.

04:17You turn that baby around.

04:18It's a baby face.

04:21Shut that baby's mouth.

04:23Take care of that baby.

04:25Your hatred is astounding.

04:27I'll see you in court.

04:29Turn that baby face around.

04:30Green versus baby.

04:32Green versus baby.

04:34I'm telling you.

04:35I hate a baby.

04:37If a baby did, if all of a sudden a parent did put a proper baby up and you saw its face

04:43looking right at you, what do you do?

04:48Wait, hold on a second.

04:49So if someone, I'm sitting and turning your baby around.

04:53Excuse me.

04:54Miss.

04:54Hold on a second.

04:55Yeah.

04:55I'm sitting in front of you with my kid and I lift my kid up just to get some air, you

05:00know, to look around to, you know, he can occupy his time.

05:03Yep.

05:04You're going to.

05:05Yeah.

05:07Yes.

05:09Yes.

05:09What's wrong?

05:10Look at this.

05:10Look at this baby.

05:11Oh, the cute little baby.

05:12No, he's not cute.

05:13It's disgusting.

05:13I want it turned around.

05:15I don't want to look at it anymore.

05:16Oh.

05:16Woo.

05:17I don't know what that was.

05:18Sorry.

05:20Wrong sound effect.

05:21That's the baby's reaction.

05:23It changes.

05:24It changes.

05:24I was like, did Dave just see kitties or something?

05:27That's something.

05:29Yeah.

05:29No.

05:29Turn that baby around.

05:30I'll tell.

05:31I mean, I will try to do whatever I can.

05:33I'm not going to have to look at your kid.

05:34Andy versus baby.

05:35God, I would love to see a parent be told by Andy to turn their stupid baby around.

05:41Me too.

05:42I will do.

05:43I don't care.

05:44Turn your goddamn baby around or I'll see you in court.

05:47Listen, your baby's making me so uncomfortable.

05:49I don't know how I'd react if someone said that to me as a parent.

05:52I'd be like, what?

05:53Oh, yeah.

05:54This cute little baby.

05:54That baby was looking at me all the time, that little baby.

05:58Oh.

05:59Turn that baby around.

06:01Turn it around.

06:02All right.

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