Muhalla Amarpura ki rakhwali kay liye Amanat taiyar... masti aur hansi say bhari video

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Fun
Transcript
00:00 Friends, if someone is asked who is a good person,
00:04 he will answer that he is a person who does not lie,
00:07 who is honest,
00:08 who never hurts anyone.
00:10 So, you will also say that he is a very good person,
00:14 a very good person,
00:16 who does not lie, is honest and is harmless.
00:19 Although this is wrong.
00:20 He is not a good person, he is a human being.
00:23 A human being should be like this.
00:25 He should not lie to anyone,
00:27 he should not be treacherous to anyone.
00:29 Everyone should protect the life, wealth and honor of others.
00:34 It is a duty on everyone.
00:35 This is not a sign of a good person,
00:38 this is a sign of a human being.
00:41 And if you want to know who is a good person,
00:45 then first of all, change your definition.
00:47 A good person is one who does at least one good deed every day
00:54 which is not a duty.
00:55 A good person is one who does good deeds actively.
01:00 The rest of the people who say that we do not lie,
01:04 they are humans.
01:05 A human being should be like this.
01:07 Let's start today's show with this message.
01:10 Today, let's take you to the neighborhood and see the condition of the neighbors.
01:14 The condition of the neighborhood is very bad.
01:16 Okay, what happened?
01:17 They have started stealing and robbing.
01:19 Oh, I see you guys are very worried.
01:22 A boy said that he will rob his father's shop.
01:25 He would steal one bullet and say that his father is a thief.
01:29 Okay, you made your father run this shop.
01:32 What do you do?
01:33 I have worked all my life.
01:34 Now I don't have the courage to ask my father to run the shop.
01:38 When he lost his courage,
01:40 he said that he is a son and he is a father.
01:43 He made the shop and I had to steal it.
01:45 Why?
01:46 A woman came to the back lane for groceries.
01:48 Okay.
01:49 She came to ask him, "Are you following me?"
01:51 Now you remember me.
01:53 Oh my God!
01:54 I would have killed you.
01:55 You can write it down here.
01:57 It is a disease of forgetting our father.
01:59 Sister, father doesn't have the disease of forgetting.
02:01 Hmm.
02:02 Every woman has the disease of finding her wife.
02:05 What kind of a man are you?
02:07 Look at your age and your work.
02:09 Okay, now you want to kill me?
02:10 Tell me.
02:11 No, no, don't kill me.
02:12 Then what do you want me to do?
02:13 Don't say this to every woman.
02:15 It's nothing like that.
02:16 Hmm.
02:16 I have three wives.
02:19 Yes, very good.
02:20 I am a man of forgetting.
02:22 Then why don't you get your father married?
02:25 You are going to get married.
02:26 What time is it?
02:27 I don't know what you are thinking.
02:29 Now tell me, when will you get me married?
02:35 Okay, one thing is that you will never get the account of this business.
02:38 Why?
02:39 This man will never remember the money.
02:41 He remembers the money.
02:43 Hmm.
02:43 Your wife forgets.
02:45 I will get you from 27th.
02:47 Come, come, brother.
02:49 No problem.
02:51 Yes.
02:51 So, brother.
02:52 The problem is solved.
02:54 What? How?
02:55 Sit, sit, sit.
02:56 I have brought Sheru, the watchman.
02:58 Oh, wow, wow, wow.
02:59 He is a very honest man.
03:00 The gardener told me.
03:02 Hmm.
03:02 He doesn't look like that.
03:03 Sheru, this is our garden.
03:06 The last four to five cars.
03:08 Hmm.
03:08 This is my house.
03:11 Now there are thieves here.
03:12 Yes.
03:13 Sheru has come to our area.
03:15 The thief's fate is such that he comes here.
03:17 Then where is your gun?
03:19 And whoever has a gun.
03:21 I am a movie star.
03:23 Jackie Chan's.
03:24 I will shoot such a kick that he will remember it for life.
03:26 If he shoots from a long distance, how will you shoot?
03:29 He will go back like a matrix.
03:32 But today, there is no need to worry about the law.
03:35 Sheru's fate is such that no thief's courage will come here.
03:38 Don't talk so much.
03:39 Okay, whoever has valuables in the house.
03:43 Hmm.
03:43 Give me all the invitations.
03:45 Take it.
03:46 Thank you.
03:47 You should have known who will come to my house tomorrow.
03:50 That's right.
03:51 There are three to four huts in front of my house every day.
03:54 Okay, I understood that you have two huts here.
03:58 Yes.
03:58 And brother, tell me something.
04:01 Ask me.
04:02 Where have you kept the jewelry of the villagers?
04:03 You have already told me.
04:05 I will tell you everything.
04:07 I think you are the man of thieves.
04:11 Brother, the thing is that whether the thieves know or not.
04:16 Sheru should know.
04:18 Why?
04:18 Brother, if the thief goes near the door, I will kill him.
04:22 I have given you the marriage certificate of an old woman.
04:25 Instead of keeping a guard like this, it would have been better
04:28 if you had put doors on both sides of the lane.
04:31 The doors would have been put, but they would have come.
04:33 What is this?
04:35 I don't know what kind of locks they open.
04:37 Okay, okay.
04:37 But I wouldn't have been there.
04:39 The lock would have been opened.
04:40 Okay, in such neighborhoods, the door is stolen.
04:44 Which is not to be saved.
04:46 It happens.
04:47 Your knees would have been hurt.
04:48 You would have been beaten.
04:49 You know what?
04:52 I have to give him Rs. 20,000 per month.
04:54 Rs. 20,000 is very less.
04:56 Sir, tea, water and food is also ours.
04:58 Sir, I agree.
05:00 Do you agree?
05:00 Sir, Rs. 20,000 is a small amount in today's times.
05:03 Okay, you have to give me whatever I want.
05:04 You know that I can't give you what I want.
05:06 You are giving me food and money.
05:08 Where will you sleep?
05:09 If I sleep, where will I be a guard?
05:12 Wow.
05:13 Have you ever been a guard?
05:15 I had a friend in a village who was a guard.
05:17 I used to watch movies with him all night.
05:20 We used to chat.
05:21 He told me that I should be with him all night.
05:24 And become a guard.
05:25 You used to watch movies all night.
05:27 When did you become a guard?
05:28 My wife was a guard in the sand mill.
05:31 Okay, okay.
05:33 I don't think you can make a movie here.
05:35 Uncle, you don't get a job in the city.
05:37 You are a kangaroo's son.
05:39 Okay, tell me something.
05:41 Do you have any jewelry at home?
05:42 I have kept new jewelry in the bank.
05:43 In the locker.
05:44 You did a good job.
05:45 Do you have any cash at home?
05:47 I have a card.
05:48 Do you have any expensive watch at home?
05:49 I don't have a watch.
05:51 I give my aunt time.
05:52 I don't like to wear watches.
05:53 In this account, Mr. Raj.
05:55 Yes.
05:56 You should be careful.
05:58 No, no.
05:59 You don't need to be careful.
06:00 No, no.
06:01 Look, there is a precious society at home.
06:03 What?
06:04 I have 3 kgs of cotton in each loan.
06:06 Oh, my God.
06:08 You should calculate this.
06:10 I think you should give me 2,00,000 to 5,000.
06:14 And when that cotton is wet, it weighs a lot.
06:17 And this is the room in which he is comfortable.
06:21 Yes.
06:21 He will sit here and look up.
06:23 The day he will know that he is in trouble.
06:24 He is good at convincing.
06:27 How?
06:28 His comfort level must be so low.
06:29 Look at his face.
06:32 He looks like he has been cheated.
06:33 Look, when a person feels cold.
06:37 Yes.
06:37 Is it expensive or not?
06:39 Yes, it can be.
06:40 Your cold can destroy 3 kgs of room.
06:44 He must have an expensive LED.
06:46 No, no.
06:46 I have never kept a TV at home.
06:48 The atmosphere of the house is bad.
06:49 Okay, he must have kept expensive mobiles.
06:53 No, no.
06:54 I have a second button.
06:55 What will the watchman do?
06:57 I won't keep this much.
06:58 If you keep this for me,
07:01 you will doubt me.
07:02 I will go home at night.
07:04 Look, now he is in trouble.
07:07 He will know.
07:08 He must have told the thief.
07:09 I can be a better watchman than him.
07:10 I will come back in 15,000 per month.
07:12 I can sing well.
07:13 Yes.
07:14 "Stay awake, you fool."
07:16 Yes.
07:17 A woman shouldn't keep it there.
07:20 This is a different neighborhood.
07:20 If all the thieves get to know,
07:22 they will be here.
07:23 Uncle,
07:25 tell me now.
07:27 How many biscuits and cakes do you have?
07:29 You are a father.
07:30 You can play here.
07:31 Your mother must be fine.
07:32 You are my father.
07:34 Call your mother.
07:36 Uncle, now
07:38 Yes.
07:38 close the shop.
07:40 Yes.
07:40 Don't worry.
07:41 I will come back in six months.
07:42 If the shop is closed,
07:43 you will be worried.
07:44 I won't steal anything now.
07:48 I had to tell you.
07:49 Yes.
07:50 Uncle,
07:50 close the shop.
07:51 Wait a minute.
07:52 Let me start.
07:53 Oh God.
07:54 Hello.
07:55 My hero is here.
07:57 Yes.
07:58 Sir, who called you?
08:00 What?
08:01 What is the matter?
08:01 I have already thrown it out.
08:02 Then, why did you call me?
08:05 He is our tenant.
08:07 He is from that house.
08:08 Oh.
08:08 He has bought a room there.
08:10 He only sells food.
08:11 I had to tell you.
08:13 I had to throw it out.
08:14 Uncle,
08:15 get lost.
08:16 I am going home.
08:17 Hey.
08:29 Yes.
08:30 Take some time and tune your father.
08:32 And fill the tank.
08:33 He is a young boy.
08:37 He has bought it on reserve.
08:39 He left the house in a hurry.
08:41 He didn't even check the locks.
08:42 What are these locks?
08:44 He didn't give the locks.
08:45 He checked the pot.
08:46 This is how security is.
08:48 He must have stolen something.
08:50 It happens in the neighbourhood.
08:52 Everyone is smart.
08:54 Who puts a stamp in front of the shop?
08:56 Even today,
08:57 they close the shop like this.
08:59 They are in Pakistan.
09:00 They don't close the shop outside.
09:01 Yes.
09:02 They are open.
09:02 I had called you.
09:03 I am going.
09:04 Jabbar.
09:06 Yes.
09:06 Keep a watchman.
09:07 I am going.
09:09 I am going.
09:11 He is from the yogurt shop.
09:14 He is from the yogurt shop.
09:17 You are from the yogurt shop.
09:18 He is 3 kilometres away from me.
09:21 Yes.
09:22 Haroon.
09:24 There were no thefts in the last locality.
09:26 Okay.
09:26 They have kept a watchman in this shop.
09:29 Oh.
09:32 Haroon,
09:32 you are so lucky.
09:34 Then?
09:36 There were no thefts in the last locality.
09:38 They are in a meeting.
09:40 They are in a meeting.
09:41 They could have stolen the share.
09:43 It was Guddu.
09:44 Anyway,
09:47 we will have to give the money.
09:48 How much?
09:49 We will distribute the share
09:51 that we get.
09:53 How much is the share?
09:53 Rs. 500.
09:54 Rs. 500?
09:56 I will not give.
09:57 Hold my hand.
09:58 We get a weekly interest of Rs. 500.
10:04 You want to give Rs. 500?
10:06 You have cheated us.
10:08 Don't worry about my share.
10:11 Sheru is here.
10:13 Jabbar,
10:15 you may go.
10:16 Brother. - Sleep well.
10:17 I want to tell you that
10:18 you have to keep the share.
10:21 I just want to say that
10:23 tell him that..
10:24 He is not disappointed.
10:33 We should give you more money.
10:35 Yes. - Why?
10:36 Because your curtains have no latches.
10:38 No, they don't.
10:40 Spit it out.
10:42 You don't see my wife all day.
10:46 You are arguing with me.
10:48 Don't do this.
10:52 You will tear the ear curtain.
10:55 What?
10:56 It is torn.
10:59 Get new curtains.
11:00 Give it to my wife.
11:02 I will get you a new one.
11:05 They are having fun with me.
11:10 Jabbar, do you know?
11:11 No.
11:11 They will sleep peacefully.
11:14 There will be a watchman.
11:15 There will be no theft.
11:16 Don't worry.
11:18 His name is Sheru.
11:19 If he sleeps,
11:20 no one will sleep peacefully.
11:21 Don't do this.
11:23 Will he stay awake all night?
11:25 Yes.
11:26 If I say tonight, he will put a watch.
11:28 We are not watchmen.
11:29 Keep it.
11:31 You are going to sleep.
11:32 No, thank God.
11:34 My wife is..
11:35 What?
11:39 She is a bad person.
11:41 Okay.
11:42 Don't do this.
11:43 Yes.
11:44 Okay.
11:45 He is a thief.
11:46 He is a thief.
11:47 God knows when he will be in a bad state.
11:49 Very good.
11:50 But what he is saying,
11:51 is a change of mind.
11:53 There is a watchman.
11:55 He won't come.
11:56 Whatever it is,
11:57 keeping a watchman makes a difference.
12:00 Of course.
12:01 He is a watchman.
12:02 He will be carefree.
12:03 If a time comes,
12:04 God forbid,
12:05 and someone takes a gun at you,
12:07 never try to be a hero.
12:09 Don't.
12:10 This is a common thing.
12:12 It is the job of the police to stop them.
12:14 But,
12:15 you should have enough deterrence
12:18 that if someone wants to rob you,
12:20 or if someone is coming with the intention of theft,
12:22 he should think ten times.
12:24 Have enough deterrence.
12:25 This is what you should do.
12:26 I will get Rs. 10,000 per month.
12:29 Keep it.
12:30 I will whistle.
12:31 You are getting scared.
12:33 I can whistle without a whistle.
12:37 You can whistle.
12:38 I am Rajpejana.
12:39 I will give you the money.
12:42 But,
12:43 explain one thing.
12:44 I am a fire-rapper.
12:45 Explain that if..
12:47 One second.
12:53 I will fly in your cup.
12:57 Thank you.
12:58 You never kept a knife in front of him.
13:00 It is a stupid thing.
13:02 I am a neighborhood guy.
13:03 I don't do this.
13:04 You sleep without any worries.
13:06 The neighborhood guard is here.
13:07 He is here.
13:08 Sleep, my brother.
13:10 I don't know.
13:12 Okay.
13:14 Good night.
13:15 He is saying,
13:21 "This is the place."
13:22 This is the place.
13:25 Good night.
13:26 Good night.
13:27 Okay.
13:28 You sleep without any worries.
13:30 I am going to sleep.
13:31 Count your kundas.
13:32 I am counting.
13:33 One kunda is yours.
13:34 He didn't do his duty.
13:36 I have two kundas.
13:38 Three kundas, Sheru.
13:41 How do you know about one or two kundas?
13:43 One or two is yours.
13:44 One is mine.
13:45 Listen.
13:47 It is not even 12 o'clock.
13:48 Where are you going?
13:49 We are going to work.
13:50 You are a TV guy.
13:52 You are a businessman.
13:53 Wow.
13:54 You are a TV guy.
13:56 You are not smart.
13:57 I am also a businessman.
14:00 I have a break.
14:01 Go and sleep.
14:05 Let us sleep.
14:06 You can't sleep so early.
14:08 You don't know.
14:09 We have to wake up early.
14:11 We have to count kundas.
14:13 He is drinking coffee and sleeping.
14:17 It is time for the night.
14:19 We have to do our duty in the ration shop.
14:21 Get up.
14:22 Sheru said it.
14:23 Very good.
14:24 He is a big shot.
14:26 He doesn't know the rules.
14:27 I will give you 5000 rupees.
14:30 I will beat him up.
14:32 I will send him to the police station.
14:33 You should also give me some money.
14:37 I will take care of you.
14:38 You are not in your premises.
14:40 I have a problem with 20,000 rupees.
14:43 Why?
14:44 At least.
14:45 Our security guards.
14:47 Be it Punjab, Sindh or Peshawar.
14:50 They are not doing their job.
14:53 Prove yourself.
14:55 Companies give them 20,000 or 30,000.
14:57 They give them 16,000.
14:58 That is right.
14:59 I didn't bring them from the company.
15:01 I brought them directly from home.
15:02 The security guard is from home.
15:04 The security guard at home must not have training.
15:12 They don't take training.
15:14 They say I beat up a dog in Punjab.
15:16 Sheru, you will get tea.
15:20 I will get a cup of tea.
15:22 But tell the tea maker to give me tea every half an hour.
15:24 That means neither your sister sleeps nor you.
15:26 She makes tea all night.
15:30 You give him 20,000.
15:32 Okay.
15:33 Give it to the maid's sister or the maid.
15:35 He will stay awake all night.
15:38 He will stay awake.
15:40 He drinks tea.
15:41 He is not a security guard.
15:42 Okay, leave.
15:43 I have to open the shop in the morning.
15:45 My brother will bring two houses from here.
15:48 He will bring a lot of money.
15:51 You also go inside and take care of your things.
15:55 You don't have to take care of the rest.
15:57 Give him duty.
15:58 Sit here.
15:59 The whole place is yours.
16:00 He is not a security guard.
16:01 Don't talk too much.
16:03 I feel he is a thief.
16:05 Mr. Arun, do you find this guard loyal?
16:08 I feel he is loyal but he is not trained.
16:11 He is incompetent.
16:12 Incompetent.
16:13 But don't you think I could have done a better job?
16:15 No, I don't think so.
16:16 Because I feel you should have been making content all night.
16:20 And the thief would have come.
16:22 You would have said, "This thief is in this camera."
16:25 You are a dangerous thief.
16:27 Stay awake.
16:29 We will give you 20% if we stay awake.
16:37 No, I will stay awake for my teacher's sake.
16:41 I didn't give you the duty.
16:43 He will never stay awake.
16:45 I won't stay awake.
16:46 He is a fool.
16:48 You are not a human.
16:50 I am not a human.
16:51 You are a guard.
16:54 You are playing FIFA.
16:58 You whistle.
17:02 You are a youngster.
17:03 I am a guard.
17:05 You can't do anything.
17:06 You can't do anything.
17:09 What is the relation between a youngster and a youngster?
17:13 You don't understand.
17:15 This whistle is unknown.
17:17 Stay awake.
17:22 I am a natural.
17:27 What are you doing?
17:30 I am a guard.
17:31 Uncle, I am a guard.
17:33 He forgot me.
17:34 Okay.
17:36 You are a guard.
17:37 I have brought you under my protection.
17:38 What else do I have to do?
17:39 I have a brother-in-law.
17:40 I thought he might be the one.
17:42 You can sleep peacefully.
17:44 What?
17:45 You can sleep peacefully.
17:46 I am not a guard.
17:47 Uncle, you can sleep peacefully.
17:49 You are disturbing my sleep.
17:53 Stop it.
17:56 I was talking to him.
18:03 What are you doing?
18:04 Speak softly.
18:05 Okay.
18:06 He is crazy.
18:11 Have some tea.
18:12 I am not a guard.
18:13 I sleep peacefully.
18:15 He doesn't recognize me after every half an hour.
18:17 Okay.
18:18 Listen to me.
18:19 Don't whistle.
18:20 Your brother will get scared.
18:21 He is weak.
18:26 So, I will increase his heart beat.
18:27 He is a small hearted person.
18:28 Yes.
18:29 You finished the tea like juice.
18:33 Tell me one thing.
18:36 How does she make tea?
18:37 She makes strong tea.
18:38 Really?
18:39 Yes.
18:40 If she is like this after strong tea,
18:46 she will go to coma after milk tea.
18:48 He didn't wake up.
19:03 I am not doing any humanistic work.
19:05 I am resting.
19:06 I am doing my work.
19:07 Tell me one thing.
19:10 How did you sit on this bike?
19:11 Yes.
19:12 He came on bike.
19:13 I am sitting on bike like a peacock.
19:19 You came to check.
19:23 He is sleeping.
19:24 Sheru.
19:25 Sheru.
19:27 Sheru.
19:29 Sheru.
19:31 I am late.
19:33 I am leaving you.
19:35 Don't come near this shop.
19:37 The whole neighborhood is sleeping.
19:39 Get out.
19:40 I don't even open this in the morning.
19:42 Call Sarfaraz.
19:45 He has brought him.
19:46 He has to give Rs. 20,000.
19:48 Yes.
19:49 Sarfaraz.
19:52 Come out.
19:54 Wait a minute.
19:56 Why are you making noise?
19:57 What happened?
20:01 I just woke up.
20:02 I had a bad dream.
20:03 Did you sleep?
20:08 It's his debut today.
20:10 (audience laughing)
20:13 [APPLAUSE]

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