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BRITCOM ONE
  • 2 days ago

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00:00Fire and what happened to you?
00:03Oh, I had an accident.
00:06I'm not maimed, but I am a bit crispy.
00:11Apparently I can leave my COO, that stands for country of origin, something you probably don't get because you're dumb, but I cannot leave my own chaos.
00:27Sane?
00:28No, thank you. No, thank you, nurse on the sarnie. I don't need a sarnie. I need actual pain medication like Dilaudin or ketamine or even Demerol at this point. Just give me an epidural. I don't care.
00:39Well, you're, um, you do some paracetamol if you're in pain now.
00:42If I'm in pain now, I've been in pain for 24 hours. I mean, I know my face is stunning and untouched, but I have a horrible burn under my dress. Do you care?
00:50You have such a nice face, but you're a really, really bad nurse sister. I'm not kidding. I mean, you're giving me pills I could get at a bodega.
00:57I can't give you anything else.
00:59Well, then we find ourselves at a standstill.
01:03But if you come visit me at Angel's Aesthetica in Marlebone, right, on a Monday or a Wednesday,
01:08I do injections there. I do, like, Botox fillers. I mean, my speciality is a lip flip, and we prescribe Valiums, too.
01:17I will take the sandwich. Thank you.
01:20Thank you. Enjoy your song, eh?
01:26Oh, my gosh.
01:29Come on. Let's get out of here.
01:30Oh, my God. How did you get in here after?
01:33She's not allowed in here. Dog's on an on grotto. Let's go.
01:35What are you doing? I can't go. I'm an injured person in an injured place where we take care of injured people,
01:42and I have an IV.
01:43Please rise. Please rise. Please rise.
01:46Okay. Ow!
01:48Let's go. I've got your shoes.
01:49Okay.
01:50One second.
01:51Stop making so much fucking noise.
01:52Okay.
01:52We don't need this.
01:53Okay.
01:53All right. Fine.
01:54I don't know.
01:57I feel like I'm listening out or something.
02:00No. No.
02:03Oh, you can turn.
02:04Sorry, sir.
02:07Oh, sorry, dude. Sorry.
02:09Oh, God.
02:11Oh, God.
02:13It's not going to be the first thing to do.
02:14I'm sorry.
02:17I didn't sign anything.
02:19Are the police going to come after me?
02:21National Health Services, queen.
02:22Oh.
02:23Do you know what that is?
02:24We all got proper email about it during COVID.
02:26It's quite a big deal here.
02:29Are you driving with me or what?
02:31Oh, fuck.
02:33You don't have to be so aggressive to me about it.
02:36It's a simple mistake.
02:37Cold?
02:40Oh, my God.
02:41Fuck it.
02:41Oh, fuck.
02:43Sorry.
02:43Sorry.
02:43Let me get this out of the way.
02:44Oh.
02:45Wow.
02:46There's a lot of...
02:46Sorry, dog.
02:47There's a bit ashy in here.
02:48Stuff going on.
02:50There's a lot of cans down there.
02:52Thirsty.
02:53Sorry.
02:53Don't worry about that noise.
02:54That's just, I think, the battery's running out or something.
02:57But...
02:57Should we be driving this car?
03:00It's like...
03:00Yeah.
03:01Been in my car for ages.
03:03Okay.
03:04I guess we're not buckling up.
03:05Wow.
03:06Smoking near a burn victim.
03:08That's really bold of you.
03:09I mean, being a burn victim's pretty retro.
03:12Okay.
03:17You know, it's funny, because you set yourself on fire,
03:21and I want to set this car on fire.
03:24What?
03:25How?
03:26It's just like a big night.
03:28It's not actually an interesting sign.
03:30Just for the record, I didn't light myself on fire.
03:34Fire lit me on fire, so...
03:36Okay.
03:38I'm so sorry that he's smoking.
03:40You hate the smell.
03:42Fucking hell.
03:43What?
03:43Fuck you.
03:44Fuck you.
03:45It's gone.
03:46She hates it.
03:47I can't believe that I trusted a guy I met at a bar with my princess.
03:53We didn't meet at a bar.
03:54We met at a pub.
03:55Why?
03:56We met at a pub?
03:57Okay.
03:58You want a scone, Gabbna?
03:59Yeah, right.
04:00So that is, just so you know, the most annoying genre of American humor.
04:04Just like saying what we've said back to us, but in a weird EastEnders void.
04:07You're not charmed by me?
04:09That is a really needy question.
04:11I'm not needy.
04:13It's a needy question.
04:14I'm not.
04:14That's a needy question.
04:15You're needy.
04:16I don't need anything.
04:16I'm a chill little girl.
04:18I'm normal chill.
04:19I'm independent.
04:20I don't need any validation from you.
04:31I want your tea.
04:32Thanks.
04:34I love night tea.
04:36I would normally try to hide this look from you, you know?
04:39But fuck it.
04:40This is who I am.
04:41I wear a pioneer nightgown.
04:43If I was a superhero, this would be my costume.
04:45What would your name be, though?
04:46Or, like, what would your superpower be?
04:48I guess the name Pioneer Woman and the Power Eroding Boundaries.
04:54Nice.
04:56Oh, fuck.
04:57It's already 5 a.m.
04:59I have to get up in a couple hours for work.
05:01You hungry, by the way?
05:04Do you want one of these?
05:05What is that?
05:06Jaffa cake.
05:08You don't know what a jaffa cake is?
05:10It's basically like a melange of chocolate and orange on the top,
05:13and then on the bottom it's like, well, actually, there was a bit of an outcry about the name of them
05:21because, basically, they tax biscuits, but they don't tax cakes.
05:26So, basically, the jaffa cake people had to go to court to, like, prove that they're cakes
05:32because they do sort of seem like biscuits, but they come in a sleeve.
05:37It's all trivia.
05:37Yeah, just a bit of a Felix fact.
05:39I actually really like trivia.
05:42It makes me feel sort of calm, but also kind of weirdly powerful.
05:48Hmm.
05:54Why did you come back?
05:59Er...
06:00I don't know.
06:02I'm going to take off my big dress.
06:16You have, like, a lot of layers on it.
06:35It looks like you're going snowboarding or something.
06:39No, I'm sorry.
06:40So, why are you wearing it?
06:41It was my diamond.
06:42Oh.
06:46I'm painting, okay?
07:12Oh, let's find out.
07:15Okay.
07:16Thanks.
07:35It doesn't hurt.
07:36Like, I'm not pushing on the burn best now.
07:40No.
07:40So, it'd be better if I, like, come on.
07:42Yeah, I know.
07:42Like, more this side.
07:43Please have to stop talking.
07:44I just want to be distracted, okay?
07:47Okay.
07:47You're, like, acting like you're on a talk show.
07:49Sure.
07:49Well, that's a lot of eye contact.
08:05You don't like eye contact?
08:07No, I mean, I don't hate it.
08:08It's just, I don't know, maybe more of a third date thing in this country.
08:12How would an English girl do it?
08:16Yeah.
08:17Yeah.
08:17Yeah.
08:17Yeah.
08:17Yeah.
08:18Yeah.
08:18Yeah.
08:18Yeah.
08:18Yeah.
08:19Yeah.
08:19Yeah.
08:20Yeah.
08:20Yeah.
08:21Yeah.
08:21Yeah.
08:22This is how I steal your soul.
08:25You have to look at me.
08:30I've never had sex before.
08:31Fuck you.
08:32Fuck you.
08:32This is my first time.
08:33Fuck you.
08:34Fuck you.
08:43Whoa.
08:46You look really different to how you did yesterday.
08:48How so?
08:49I don't know, like, manager of a bank or something?
08:53A bank manager?
08:55Yeah, but in a good way.
08:57I have a job.
08:58I can't just wear whatever I want.
08:59I can't, like, wear a tutu or something.
09:01Well, neither can I.
09:03You have to wear shoes in most places these days, don't you?
09:06I mean, what am I supposed to wear?
09:07Like, a big, big t-shirt like you?
09:09Hey, I like this t-shirt.
09:10It's cozy.
09:11Mm-mm.
09:12And it sort of makes my head look smaller, have you noticed?
09:14Mm-mm.
09:15It has, like, a tiny head effect.
09:16Yeah.
09:17I love the tiny head effect.
09:18It's just so hot.
09:19It looks like it's on a stick.
09:20It's making me wet.
09:21I'm going to slip out of my business suit.
09:24Um, so do you think you're going to go, or...?
09:30Yeah, at some point.
09:32Okay.
09:33Good to know.
09:34Make yourself comfortable.
09:37Should I see you again, or...?
09:39I mean, I think it would be kind of weird
09:41if you spent all day in my house
09:42and then I didn't see you again.
09:44One hour.
09:45Or, like, four hours, maybe.
09:46Okay, I'll get out of your hair, then.
09:48What is your job, by the way?
09:50I'm a stripper.
09:51I'm a stripper.
09:52I was on a plane with the wine.
09:54You can call me Whitley, I call the hell mine.
09:56Listen, I'm the baddest in the school.
09:58The baddest in the game.
09:59What's going on?
10:00Excuse me, honey, but nobody's in my lane.
10:02When you was in New York, you was fucking a Yankee.
10:04I was fucking with bass.
10:05I was pitching to Frankie.
10:06These bitches so cranky.
10:08Bit of my hanky.
10:09My mommy, I'm cold.
10:10Give me my bl-
10:11So, we got this.
10:13It's ours.
10:14It's ours.
10:15When we say Pippin Partners' Christmas advert, what we're really talking about is a moment
10:22in the year.
10:23One single moment when the culture comes together.
10:27You see, this is not some posh, woke John Lewis bullshit.
10:31This is populist and pure.
10:34That's why we're so excited to have Rita Ora.
10:37Mmm.
10:38My Albanian Duchess.
10:40The thing I love about Rita as Santa is we're subverting expectation while playing into
10:46it totally.
10:47She is exactly what Santa is not.
10:49We still have to make it nice and feminist.
10:52Josie, you can handle that, can't you?
10:55You know about that stuff.
10:56Sure.
10:57Yeah.
10:58I'll relish that opportunity.
10:59Yeah.
11:00I want you to get Santa McCartney on the calendar for this week.
11:02She's expressed an interest in collaborating on the Santa Bikini.
11:07Santa Bikini.
11:09I am screaming.
11:11Um.
11:12Oh, and of course, welcome to-
11:16Jessica.
11:17Jessica.
11:18A new line producer all the way from New York.
11:21Yeah.
11:22I mean, it's such an honor.
11:23I feel like I'm going to be a part of-
11:25Oh, very well, Santa.
11:26I've prepared a little something.
11:28Uh, I trust that, uh, you're settling in.
11:31Of course, if you need anything at all, just ask.
11:33Well, not me, but, you know, come on.
11:35I'm Josie.
11:36It's nice to meet you.
11:37Nice to meet you.
11:38Nice hat.
11:39It is so good to see you.
11:42We worked together in the New York office.
11:45Um, you were the creative director on the Converse-Avril Lavigne campaign.
11:49Yeah.
11:50You know, um, I've been here almost a year, and honestly, it's so hard for me to remember my old life.
11:57Sorry.
11:58It's not about you.
11:59It's about me.
12:00It's about America.
12:01You get it.
12:02Kim's expat social media has massively taken off.
12:05It's crazy.
12:06You've got to follow at Font Voyage.
12:08I'm boss, by the way.
12:10I started out here as Kim's assistant.
12:11He is still, in fact, my assistant.
12:13It's been really hard not to just get swept up into ideating lately.
12:16Especially since I published my experimental PDF novel to much acclaim.
12:20Seriously, sales have gone fucking insane.
12:23I was able to buy a Balenciaga fanny pack with the proceeds.
12:26Which he lost at a Raven-Dalston.
12:28I didn't lose it.
12:29I gifted it to that course of Anthruple, and it was Vauxhall.
12:33Anyway.
12:37Oh my god.
12:38Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.
12:39Did you see that?
12:40He's obsessed with me, it's crazy.
12:41He's like, married to a woman.
12:43He's got BCE, seriously, big, closeted energy.
12:47Meanwhile, Kim wants to lick out his assistant.
12:49I'm calling HR.
12:51I'm calling HR right back on you, honey.
12:53How queer are you?
12:54Oh, no, not really gay.
12:56I mean, I love gay people and everything that maybe one day it will be.
13:01But I'm actually seeing someone here in London, this really cool guy.
13:06He's this indie musician that I met at a pub.
13:10Really tall guy.
13:12Wow.
13:13An indie musician who plays at pubs.
13:15For a tuppence and you hit one of those.
13:17She don't like her eggs all running.
13:20She thinks crossing her legs is funny.
13:23She looks down and knows that money.
13:27She gets it.
13:28I just encourage everyone to make a list of everything they want to experience before we're living in a fucking world.
13:35dystopia.
13:36Hug a polar bear.
13:37Kiss a butterfly.
13:38As much as I'd like to help Belinda locate a butterfly's mouth.
13:41we are here for a purpose.
13:42To discuss an emissions protest that can actually help create a place.
13:44i just encourage everyone to make a list of everything that they want to experience before we're living in a fucking dystopia.
13:58dystopia hug a polar bear kiss a butterfly as much as i'd like to help belinda locate the
14:07butterfly's mouth we are here for a purpose to discuss an emissions protest that can actually
14:11make an impact okay uh excuse me what about felix felix mm-hmm what's up felix my lust for belinda
14:24is sickening her body is like a tanned dolphin arcing out of the water i i i feel really dirty
14:29about it but um she's like 20 years old in fact she like she's literally 20 years old as if you
14:34don't shack plenty of 20 i'm a decade younger than you mate once you're more than 10 years older
14:39i've got some news for you we are all daddy why are you doing this again they eat your food they
14:46fuck up your furniture someone's taking the door off my bedroom i do it because i want to build a
14:50better world for the children that i'm not ready to have yet and may never want listen do i want to
14:55get laid after the years of frigid hell my ex-wife put me through before ultimately leaving to then
15:01go and live on a barge yes you're gonna ask me how i am how are you felix if i tell you what's on my
15:07mind are you gonna be nice about it or do you think you're gonna be a dick about it oh well that
15:11depends on what you tell me i think i met someone
15:15well uh and uh well you always think you've met someone i think it might be different this time
15:25since the last one just stop being a dick about it i'm not being a dick i'm i'm still the smell out
15:33as well there's a fucking smell now
15:35hey what you doing oh um just comparing prices on two sound stages of course
15:45fun i'm making a playlist for my friend she just got dumped by cruise beckham which is pretty much
15:51the lowest thing that's ever happened to anyone do you want to hear um oh you probably don't want
15:55my take me my ex-wife said i had horrible taste in music
15:58it's not your fault i ruined everything and it's not your fault i can't be what you need baby
16:05angels like you can fly down here with me
16:11what it's nothing i just it's not real music it's manufactured bullshit
16:22come on you're too smart to fall for that i'm not falling for anything she's on a different level
16:29i mean she is commentary on the manufactured pop star she's been commenting on it since her disney days
16:35don't make me feel stupid for loving things oh sad but what about this new guy you're seeing
16:47do we like him can we trust him is he for real or is he like
16:50a trauma bonder gaslighter narcissist tender swindler oh uh he's nice he's just that kind of guy
16:59he's really kind how long have you known him like two days like two days she's known him two days
17:06a lot of life can happen in two days then it's two weeks then it's two years you live a life full of
17:14love and then one day he says he wants a baby and you say i'm not sure
17:21then he meets a barista in silver lake and she gets pregnant and i mean this kind of thing can
17:29happen even if someone who looks like me um sorry apologies excuse me oh no no no no no carry on
17:37uh uh i encourage feelings good because i have a few i had to break up with my ex a while ago
17:43he did not have the emotional intelligence necessary to deal with dating someone whose
17:49love language is being a bitch in a fun way
17:51listen what we're saying is don't get too comfortable too quickly right stay vigilant
17:58seriously me and kim are going out later it's actually international outfit of the day day
18:03it's my favorite holiday come with there'll be fun people that i met on the looking for friends
18:08setting on raya an artisanal e-cigarette designer the guy who supplies cobalt to cartier this ripped
18:14footballer we know who's like obsessed sexually obsessed with intellectual women so like don't set
18:20your life on fire for a rando you met on the street fuck a different rando thanks guys that makes
18:25you feel amazing yeah i want to stop the chaos wendy and when i trust my own instincts chaos always
18:32follows i mean these people must know better than me everyone knows better than me it's coming
18:37your way mate watch out oh right yeah okay the great wall of peckham
18:40sorry yeah you haven't felt like this before not since the folk singer or the uh corset designer or
18:49the ukrainian refugee influencer they all feel so different and then inevitably it's too real and
18:55you're scared to end it so you stay with them for six months and get a second girlfriend hey never a
19:00second girlfriend what about linnea or nagy we broke up with them linnea uh left the pub in a huff
19:06because uh she wanted to go to a restaurant with proper cloth napkins or something fair enough
19:10nadia i think is on holiday with her gran all right but she hasn't texted me more than like
19:14i don't know once or twice a day naughty boy no pub for you you know what you have to do
19:20if you really think this is so different all right fine fine fine i'll do that
19:26well hi sorry to drop by uh i just wanted to say oh so you come here for your punishment
19:44i know i know you're game mister act like you don't give a shit try and pull me closer
19:54do you though because i've been trying to say that my circumstances have changed that i'm sort of
19:59trying to that's really tight mate okay i'm trying to change with them
20:03things don't feel like they've changed you've got a big erect penis yep you're obsessed with me
20:14and that makes you angry you're like wow she's everything i thought i never deserved
20:21so you run and you act poorly just to spit in the face of a blessing well
20:27what the fuck do you just spit on my chin oh yeah i think i might have met someone else yeah
20:36that's perfect no as in like near oh no no um yeah it's getting better thank you for your support
20:43it's all good world needs more kindness and you know whenever you did it on purpose i don't care
20:48that you still deserve empathy since i'm here i didn't do it on purpose how come as soon as a
20:53intense woman meets a flame people yell witch i'm actually just um heading out so yeah
20:59mm-hmm bit of romance what's what's her name um his name is football player he's a football player
21:07um but it's never gonna work out i mean i have the muscle tone of a newborn so
21:10oh listen don't be nervous do not be nervous listen to me wags have curves and you've got a bba
21:18big beautiful ass so just relax and uh actually i can teach you some english slang okay yeah you
21:26gotta use it use it on your day really really impressive um blosa do you know that one one of them
21:35yeah that's helpful thank you get your leg over it's having sex cottage in never heard of that
21:42so that's what george michael went to jail for but this was before he went and drive his car into a
21:47snappy snaps in in hampstead okay do you have all the things that you came with do you know what
21:53companies let's get going let's get out of here it's really fancy she needs a lip she needs a lip
22:00she needs a lip like now like right now how many lipsticks you look like a cartoon secretary what's
22:05happening with you thank you open that padded no that's weirder take off your tights take off the
22:10tights can i approach the consent to approach top top in the i'm gonna take it from the
22:14hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi pavel this is jessica hi nice to meet you nice to meet you
22:43do i'm pavel okay yeah i play for leighton orient but my passion project is the is the line of denim
22:54i'm working on for oh man but shh i won't tell so what are you all about well first of all
23:02congratulations on your accomplishments a line of denim what hey i know you're nervous to be around
23:09someone so structurally attractive but he can sense sarcasm that does translate so cool it okay
23:15kidding that's awesome yeah football what the hell yeah is that hard i don't know much about that is it
23:22hard yeah it's hard i kick the ball and i can pay for my ex's bent every month even though she's living
23:28with my um what's the word um cousin damn that's ice cold yeah totally my ex doesn't drive he has
23:37spatial awareness issues but um it doesn't matter who cares i'm not thinking about him i'm thinking
23:44about you who cares
23:45get to know you over this amazing dinner all right then so
23:53no no no no stop hey you're funny you know that really what did i say that was funny yeah you
24:00you make funny faces hey who am i perfect yeah something like that i love your intonations
24:09really yeah like how you're saying that thank you what's she saying she said she likes me
24:15can't wait to have anal sex with you
24:19i'm kidding kidding be crazy if we had anal sex on the first night that we met you can't say the
24:28anal is crazy i've never done it not that i would never but i just
24:32so it's gross thing just it's gross i don't think it's gross i just think i should you know
24:38take a class or something first what is happening now
24:41oh you think that's funny you think that's funny it's not that kind of laughing it's not funny
24:50it's not fucking funny you pathetic baby man
24:53okay
24:54yeah
24:58you don't like me
25:01oh you don't respect me so why why have you been hanging around
25:07hey
25:08i'm not dumb okay
25:13i know you don't really like me no one likes me
25:19that's not true
25:19i bet your mum likes you like she probably loves you
25:23i fucking hate this plume
25:27you're a nice guy okay but next time you date someone and you realise that they're not for you
25:38don't pretend and slowly back out the door because i can feel you going
25:43don't pretend and slowly back out the door because they're not for you
25:49um
25:50could you please untie my feet uh feet the feet bits sorry
25:57come here
26:05come here
26:07come here
26:08now
26:10i'm sorry okay
26:18i'm sorry
26:21i was like all of
26:24it was all really like super hot and sexy
26:27i just
26:28really
26:29really
26:30yeah like so mad impressive where you're so like just in it and i really tried
26:40hi jason you're right my parents aren't proud but that's because like 16% of the american population
26:48they are addicts but my grandma's super proud because i just bought her a house
26:54oh also say hi to your dad because we've been fucking and i'm your step mommy now
27:00here's a thing wendy i used to be afraid that the crisis was coming for me and now i'm realizing
27:10what if i am the crisis and you know if i just toned it down or if i just speak when spoken to
27:18you or just behave in general maybe i could keep it at bay jessica
27:25one
27:26one
27:27hi
27:28one second
27:29one second
27:31hey
27:33hi
27:34what's up
27:35what were you talking to your son
27:36you're like an m. night shaman movie in there are you good
27:39um yeah no it's it's not what it looks like i i just make these little videos on my phone
27:45it's technically social media videos but my account is private so it's just for me just a way to express myself you know let it loose just a way for me to let loose
27:54dear wendy jones today would have been seven my seventh anniversary i imagined myself encircled in roses in a luxury hotel in the caribbean but instead i'm like the goth boy in american beauty filming all the garbage i so deeply relate to
28:11so i'll edit it thank you that actually means a lot to me who is wendy fiction non-fiction she's your sister and she died or something i'm no no no my sister's alive she's just like
28:24really severely depressed wendy is my ex's fiancee your ex fiancee no no my um ex's fiancee uh the woman that he left me for um and the worst part is that i can't even hate her because she pulled herself out of foster care by the bootstraps and um she has really unique awesome style she's really beautiful woman she's a beautiful woman as simple as that
28:48you can hate her you don't need a zoom no you can definitely hate her and and you talk to her and you like that it feels nice talking to the woman that your ex is digging down i'm genuinely asking because for me the maths they don't math
29:08yeah i mean in my head she's talking back she's saying things back sometimes yeah always all the time she's always like
29:15you know you seem intense and and really worked up but this shows me you're doing an excellent job of keeping it on lock in public
29:25um i'm just trying to do what i can to survive
29:28um i know the feeling uh i'll see you out there yeah kim i literally don't know which way is up anymore
29:36sorry i'm such a fucking mess um you're not a mess you're you're a work in progress it's simple you just listen to yourself yeah thank you kim i would hug you but you're almost out the door i'll just hug you in my mind
29:53oh my mind hugging back
29:56oh here you are what did i miss
30:02hmm you've gone for a long time you were pooping
30:07no i wasn't pooping um i was doing it doesn't matter it doesn't matter are you okay mocking me
30:18because you're a messy one aren't you
30:22me
30:25yeah i look at you at your lips
30:31sorry i mean i just um i hate that word
30:34like a dust that's risen in popularity in the last five years
30:38i mean you know everyone being like i'm a mess this shit's messy
30:42women online being like i'm a mess i choose chaos
30:45but would a man never be told that he's a mess no thank you pavel i mean a quick bathroom google showed me that you have a wife and two year old twins and yet here you are hoping to fuck one of us
30:59is it me we don't know yet
31:02actually my twins are three years old
31:05okay that's fucking messy
31:07okay that's fucking messy
31:08and yet you get a freebie right because why
31:11why because you never let yourself on fire something that i also haven't done obviously
31:17so yeah i guess by the world's standards i'm messy but actually i'm a work in progress
31:22because i know who i am and i know what i want
31:25and i'm listening to myself
31:27right kim
31:29i didn't mean for you to start immediately but
31:32go off
31:33she goes hard in the paint
31:35you know what the guy that i've been seeing for the last 46 hours
31:37whoa
31:38he doesn't care
31:39he doesn't care
31:40he doesn't care
31:41and if that makes him a love bombing gaslighter then okay i guess
31:45then i guess i i'm dating a love bomber
31:48i mean i guess
31:50yeah i guess i choose chaos
31:52or actually you know what chaos chose me
31:55because i'm fucking irresistible
32:00she's amazing
32:02actually yeah she's amazing
32:04yeah she's amazing
32:34i don't think she likes wearing that
32:43how do you know that
32:45just a vibe
32:46i think she's a naturist
32:48what's just what's a naturist like david attenborough
32:53no naturist is someone who gets naked for sport
32:55hi by the way
32:56hi
32:57sorry that was weird
32:58um
32:59i think you mean a nudist
33:01like my dad's friend skip used to get naked and jump in the pool and freak us all out
33:05uh no that sounds to me like skip was just a full-on pervert
33:09yeah
33:10well women need to be careful of perverts
33:12and tinder swindlers and love bombers
33:15oh yeah what is that
33:17someone explained love bombing to me the other day but i didn't really get it
33:20isn't it just like being really nice to someone
33:23oh my god
33:24oh my god
33:25i do not
33:26i can't do this with you
33:27i can't
33:28do the emotional labor of explaining this
33:30are you a love bomber are you gonna like buy me a piano
33:33uh no
33:34i can make you a mix though
33:36is that allowed
33:38do you want to listen to it
33:40do you want to listen to it
33:49i don't like know anything about music
33:51i like girly bullshit
33:52so don't expect me to like tell you what i think about it
33:55okay
33:56all you have to do is listen to it
33:58okay
33:59i'm gonna give you the controls
34:01is that comfortable
34:02mm-hmm
34:03and if you don't like a song just skip it
34:06alright
34:07alright
34:08thank you
34:38I am cold in my mouth
34:43There is a feeling I love
34:49Buried in my brow
34:55I have no reason to run
35:01I see no reason
35:05Are you with me now?
35:15Are you with me now?
35:26Are you with me now?
35:32It's not impossible
35:35It's not impossible
35:41It's not unusual
35:47Baby
35:49To feel the shadow