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00:00Previously on the summer I turned pretty my family's been going to Susanna's Beach House and Cousins every summer since I was a baby
00:12Look who came back all grown up
00:14Susanna told me that when I was born she knew I was destined for one of her boys
00:18I always hoped it would be Conrad
00:21I wrangled belly an invitation to be a debutante now which one of you is gonna be belly's escort to the ball
00:27Uh so are you and Jeremiah like a thing?
00:30You're like basically related
00:32I'm not going with either of you I am going to find my own date
00:35I don't know what to think about you this summer
00:36You have new friends you have a boyfriend
00:38I don't even know who you are anymore
00:40Is that why you threw yourself at my brother so that you could get back at me?
00:43My heart's beating really fast
00:45You're having a panic attack
00:46It's my mom
00:47I know you said you didn't want to do chemo
00:49But I'm not putting myself through treatment again
00:51I'm gonna tell the kids when we get back to Boston
00:53Why are you acting so different?
00:55I mean something's going on just tell me
00:57Ellie I think about you
00:58I do
00:59You know I do
01:00I just can't
01:02You're my best friend
01:03There are times I wanted to be more
01:05I was just waiting
01:06I mean how am I supposed to fully jump into something with Jeremiah
01:09If a piece of my heart still beats for his brother?
01:12Will you go with me to the temple?
01:15Hey does my mom seem okay to you?
01:16I heard your parents talk about it and your mom seemed really upset
01:18Hey have you guys seen Jeremiah?
01:25Come around
01:27We need to talk all right?
01:28It's important
01:28It's about mom
01:29You've known this whole fucking time you didn't tell me
01:31I told them I'd do the trial
01:33It's going to work
01:35Ellie I'm sorry for being so shitty all of a sudden
01:37I mean you were going through all this alone
01:39I wish you had told me so you didn't have to
01:42No matter what happens next
01:43I will always come back to this place
01:46And these people
01:47You live in my dream step
02:01Broken my fantasy
02:04I stay in reality
02:06You live in my dream step
02:102020, 2020, 2020
02:12You've been hit me, you've been hit me
02:15You're back
02:18I'm back
02:19We get it, you guys are into each other
02:27Don't listen to him
02:30You two are perfect together
02:31I wasn't in Cousins
02:49Conrad and I weren't together
02:52And Susanna was dead
02:54Nothing would ever be the same again
02:57Hey
02:57You drop this
02:59Conklin
03:02What?
03:04I said you dropped this, Conklin
03:05You're reading The Hunger Games in...
03:08In...
03:09French
03:09Trying to
03:10I almost know the English version by heart
03:12So it's...
03:13It's not that difficult to follow
03:14Very cool
03:17Thanks
03:18Escaping to your dreams is easier than living with your memories
03:24It's the being awake
03:26That's the hard part
03:27This almost doesn't feel real
03:37How about now?
03:41I can't stop smiling
03:49You know, you have the prettiest smile I've ever seen
03:54Your whole face just lights up
03:56I wanted to say that to you all so many
03:59There's something that I need to tell you
04:09I don't even know how
04:13Okay
04:13What is it?
04:17You figured out?
04:17I, um, a few days ago
04:23Jeremiah told me what she wants from me
04:26Oh
04:32Wow, okay
04:34So what did you say?
04:42I...
04:43Kissed him a few times
04:45So, um
04:55So when we both came to pick you and Taylor up from the side of the road
04:59You know, and
05:00You went with Jay
05:02Were you two already?
05:03Yeah
05:03You know, but there were
05:07Moments of summer where I thought maybe there could be something with you and me
05:10And then
05:11You know, you'd shut down
05:13And get really cold
05:14And I get it
05:15I know, I'm sorry
05:15I'm sorry
05:16It's all my fault
05:18I know
05:18I mean, it's mine too
05:21Do you want to be with him?
05:30Being with you is all I've ever wanted
05:32Okay
05:32That's great
05:33Be with me then
05:34What?
05:36What?
05:37Is that funny?
05:37No, I'm sorry
05:39It's just weird
05:39I mean
05:40Everyone in our house knows that I've had a crush on you
05:43Ever since like
05:44Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait
05:45You have a crush on me?
05:47Oh, shut up
05:49Yeah
05:49You're it for me, Peli
05:54I don't want to hurt Jay
05:59Me neither
06:00Look, I'll talk to him
06:02He might not even be that upset
06:04You know
06:05It's Jay
06:05He never takes anything too seriously
06:07It's not
06:08It's not like how it is with us
06:12Um
06:16I'll talk to him first
06:17I owe him that
06:18Okay
06:19Shh
06:28Somebody sit down
06:30Early morning walk on the beach
06:43Uh
06:44Yeah
06:45Mm-hmm
06:46I knew it
06:53Knew it
06:54I'm gonna go
06:58Yeah
07:00Sit down
07:06So?
07:11Mom
07:11Just let me change first
07:13All right
07:17Enjoy your summer
07:28No, but seriously
07:29It's gonna be wild
07:29It's the best team we've had in years
07:31Oh, I made us these matching crop tops
07:32They're pink, obviously
07:33And I got a bunch of new new pads
07:35Ooh, new pads, Taylor
07:37Shut up
07:37Hey, Bells
07:38God
07:39It's not too late to sign up for volleyball camp, you know
07:41Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo
07:42Oh, high school is over, bitches
07:45Woo-hoo-hoo
07:46It's not just loud, Steven
07:48Hey, if I were going to Princeton
07:50I'd be screaming about it, too
07:51Thank you, Evelyn
07:53Wait
07:53Are you going to Princeton?
07:54That's so cool, I couldn't tell
07:55Oh, you couldn't tell?
07:57Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo
07:59Ow, the spike, what's up, man?
08:01What time's a grab party tomorrow, man?
08:02Oh, the band comes on at 10
08:04I'm dating the singer
08:05Uh, yeah, the Machine Gun Kelly wannabe
08:07I tried to veto him from playing
08:09But I guess we couldn't find anybody cheaper
08:11Oh
08:12Wait, so
08:14Are you coming to the party?
08:17I don't know
08:18Belly
08:20Belly
08:21Can I talk to you for a minute, please?
08:24I gotta go
08:25Bye
08:27See you then
08:29Bye
08:29Sorry
08:29Bye
08:31Bye
08:31Belly
08:36I was reviewing your end-of-term transcripts
08:38And I couldn't help but notice
08:40That your grades have taken a serious dive
08:41I mean, you kept an A in French
08:43But you won't impress colleges with just French
08:46Is there something going on?
08:48Uh, there's a death in the family
08:50Oh, I-I'm so sorry to hear that
08:53But your grades have been dipping all year
08:56You even got your volleyball captaincy revoked?
08:59Yeah, I-I choked at regionals
09:01Okay, well, have you, um
09:04Have you thought about where you're gonna apply next year?
09:06Um, I mean, I know I'm not getting into an IV
09:08But there's always Penn State
09:09Well, that might be a reach at this point
09:11Without volleyball, you'll have to focus on less competitive schools
09:14Have you heard about Finch?
09:18Um, yeah, I know someone who's going there in the fall
09:20A family friend
09:21Great, well, maybe you can visit them and grab a tour
09:24I doubt it
09:26Come in
09:29Good morning, Bells
09:33Hey
09:34Come here
09:36So, I stayed up all night
09:42Doing research on-on the trial my mom agreed to
09:45And, Belly, I'm-I'm feeling really hopeful
09:48That's-that's great, Jer
09:50I mean, I'm so glad that Susanna agreed to do it
09:53Yeah, I mean, if I'm being honest
09:56I'm still kind of pissed
09:57Conrad never told me what was going on with her
09:58But, you know, at least it worked out, right?
10:03Right
10:03That's kind of why I think we should tell Conrad about us as soon as possible
10:09I don't-I don't want any more secrets
10:11And plus, Stephen already knows
10:13Actually, that-that's what I wanted to talk to you about
10:21Okay
10:23See, um, the thing is, um, last night I really couldn't sleep all night
10:31So I went to watch the sunrise on the beach
10:36And Conrad was there and we just started talking
10:40And one thing led to another and-and, um, and we-we kissed
10:45You kissed my brother
10:54I'm sorry
10:57I didn't think that, you know, like he-we-I mean, we wanted to tell you right away, so-
11:02You-you're already a we?
11:04No, no, no
11:05I-I just didn't-I-I didn't want it to be weird
11:08Well, yeah, Belly, it is weird, okay?
11:11No, Jer, please
11:12No, no, you know what?
11:13Actually, it's cool
11:14It's cool, I get it
11:15You know, I was just a distraction to keep you busy while you waited for Conrad
11:18I'm glad it finally happened for you, Belly
11:21It's great timing
11:22It's not like my mom has cancer or anything
11:24Jer, I didn't want to hurt you
11:26You're-you're one of my best friends
11:27No
11:28No, you don't-you don't get to call me that
11:30You don't mean that
11:34I do
11:36Now, can you please get out?
11:43Just so you know
11:44He's gonna break your heart
11:57We should already be in the car
12:00Coming!
12:07Hey, is this okay?
12:09I swear I left the tickets here
12:10I thought your dad was meeting us there
12:13Well, you-shoot, I forgot to make the reservation for lunch
12:15Yeah, I figured, so I did it
12:17Well, they're not gonna start without me, we've got time
12:20I was supposed to iron that shirt for you
12:21Take it off and I can-
12:22Oh, it-it's handled, it's handled, see?
12:25I use the starch spray that makes it look real smooth, eh?
12:30Oh, is that for me?
12:32What?
12:36Sweet! A laptop?
12:38Well, who sent this? What?
12:40Oh, my God
12:41It's from Susanna
12:43She must have planned it before
12:46Classic Beck
12:48I wish she could have been here
12:50Yeah, Conrad and Jeremiah, too
12:53They were busy
12:55Yeah, sure
12:57I feel awful
13:05Brady
13:08He was so angry at us
13:11And he has every right to me, honestly
13:14It's gonna be okay, Billy
13:19I promise
13:19How?
13:24I think maybe we should hit pause
13:35What?
13:40No
13:40I don't want to make things harder for you guys than they already are
13:44You're not
13:45I promise
13:46The most important thing right now
13:48Is that you and Jeremiah are there for each other
13:52Are there for Susanna
13:53And I
13:54Us being together would make that impossible
13:58Ellie, come on
13:59I can't do that to him
14:03I hate that
14:17Yeah, me too
14:21What?
14:27Um
14:27This was always yours
14:35No matter what happens
14:39We'll still be infinite
14:42You should read this
15:10Later
15:11Later, we should go
15:12Found them
15:13Come on
15:14They say that everything happens for a reason
15:22Now who they are exactly is unclear
15:25Maybe a theologian coined it
15:27Or
15:28I don't know
15:29Whoever configured the simulation we're clearly living in
15:31Maybe it was Rihanna
15:34No, no, no
15:36Rihanna can do no wrong
15:37Definitely not
15:38But we've heard it
15:42Time and time again
15:45It's supposed to convince us
15:46You know, that everything had to happen
15:48Exactly so
15:50In order to teach us something about ourselves
15:52In order
15:52For us to grow
15:54And meet our destinies
15:57I think that's BS
16:03I'm sorry
16:04Mom
16:04Sorry
16:05You know, breakups don't always lead to breakthroughs
16:10Sometimes a girl dumps you
16:12After an awesome summer
16:13And it sucks
16:15And you learn nothing from it
16:17But you eventually force yourself to move on anyways
16:20But then
16:24The unthinkable happens
16:26And you realize it's pointless to think of life that way
16:29Belly
16:30Hey, I never see you in here
16:35Your mom assigned me this room to clean
16:38It's the easiest
16:39Since I don't think she sat put in here once
16:41To do any writing this summer
16:42Don't you hire cleaners anyway?
16:46Shh
16:47I love that necklace on you
16:54Connie told me everything that happened with the three of you
16:58I'm sorry
17:02Don't be sorry
17:03It's not how I wanted this summer to end
17:06Especially not
17:08I just feel like I'm losing everyone
17:15You're not
17:15It just takes time
17:18You'll find your way back to each other eventually
17:21And this place is always here for you
17:25Yeah, but
17:27You've made every summer here so magical, Susanna
17:30I mean, what happens
17:31What happens
17:33Belly?
17:36You love this place the same way I do
17:38If anyone can keep the magic going here, it's you
17:44You're my special girl
17:49I need to call the cleaners
17:55Promise me you'll never leave me
17:59Never
18:00Because everything just happens
18:06You know, good things, bad things
18:09All in ways that you'd never expect
18:11All in ways that are so completely out of your control
18:15That they could just drive you insane
18:17There are times
18:22Where it feels like the world is happening to you
18:25But remember that you
18:27Are also happening to the world
18:29So don't wait
18:31Make what you want happen
18:34Because tomorrow isn't promised
18:35So you better make fucking sure
18:37That you are living today
18:38So extra
19:04Although he did earn it with that speech
19:06It was good
19:07Yeah
19:07The speech kind of pierced my soul
19:10Don't laugh
19:14No, no, I'm sorry
19:15No, I feel like I've been in this nightmare
19:16Ever since Susanna died
19:18Well, maybe it's time to wake up
19:20Oh, I gotta go find Milo
19:24He needs my help putting together a look for tonight
19:25Oh, cool
19:27Do you want to come over after and help me with mine?
19:31No fucking way
19:32Are you coming?
19:33Yeah
19:33Really?
19:35And I'm going to sign up for a varsity volleyball camp too
19:38Yes!
19:39Oh my god, babe
19:40This party's going to be insane
19:41You are going to die when you see Milo play
19:43No, yeah
19:44I mean, you literally might
19:45Because, oh man
19:46I could smell him from the podium
19:47Really?
19:48Yeah
19:48Well, I'm sorry
19:49Excuse me
19:49My man doesn't have that Korean gene
19:51That makes you have no body odor
19:52Okay, all right
19:53Come on, Ellie
19:54Mom and Dad are meeting us at the restaurant
19:55Bye
19:55Bye, see you later
19:56It was a great speech
19:59You know, Susanna would have loved it
20:02Yeah, I know
20:03You know, I'm glad you guys are coming to the party tonight
20:06Wow
20:08I can't believe what I'm hearing
20:10You really want me and Taylor at your party?
20:12Why, I never said want
20:14I just
20:14I just think it's better than moping around at home
20:17Like, you should drive
20:21Really?
20:23You know, I gotta read all the love in my DMs for my speech anyways
20:25So
20:25All right, come on
20:27Yo, this is dope
20:33I'm going viral on TikTok
20:35Is that a good thing?
20:36What, millions of people around the world
20:38Watching my speech on a loop?
20:40Yes
20:41That is a very good thing
20:43I gotta forward this to Con and J, man
20:46Thank you so much
20:49Oh, I'm sorry
20:51Could I get a box for all this?
20:53Yeah, thank you, man
20:54Thank you
20:56Happiness is an activity
21:03Um, okay
21:04Okay, well, everyone agrees you are the best
21:09It doesn't say that
21:11It's so random
21:11No, it doesn't
21:12It literally says it right here
21:13It literally says it right here
21:13I don't know what you want
21:14You want to see it?
21:15Yeah
21:15You want to see it?
21:16Look, I don't know what you want from me
21:17It says it right there
21:18I know what you're telling you
21:19We're so proud of you
21:20You're going to have the time of your life at Princeton, right, Laura?
21:23Yeah, I love college
21:24That's where I met Susanna
21:25So, how are things going with your book?
21:31My publisher is hounding me to do this meet and greet event with booksellers
21:35I said no
21:36Why?
21:38Because it's not necessary
21:40Okay, uh, well, it's time for me to go get ready for the party
21:45Mom, mwah, Dad, mwah
21:47Thank you for lunch
21:48I'm going to go with him
21:49Uh, it was delicious
21:51Thank you
21:51All right, have fun, kids
21:53See you at home
21:54Yep
21:55So you're not trying to promote your book?
22:03I'm not going to have schmoozy conversations about Susanna
22:05Just to get prime placement in bookstores
22:07Well, you did write a whole book about her
22:10It might feel cathartic
22:11I wrote the book in a fugue state
22:13I have no interest in dissecting it
22:16Just to come up with pithy insights on grief
22:18Okay
22:20Glad the whole not going to therapy thing is working out for you
22:25Thank you
22:29Look, you wrote a beautiful book
22:35I think Susanna would want you to share it with the world
22:40She was always my biggest cheerleader
22:45Guess now I have to be my own
22:49I'll wear the skirt
22:53But I draw the line at pom-poms
22:55I am so excited that you're finally here this summer
23:03Can we do, like, everything that we never got to do together?
23:05Like, parties, pool, mall
23:07We have to get you a fake ID
23:09Let's start by figuring out what I'm going to wear tonight
23:11Oh, okay
23:12Okay
23:14Okay
23:14Susanna's earrings?
23:19They're perfect
23:20Okay
23:25Since my man is playing tonight
23:28I'm going to need you to be the super hot friend
23:30Standing next to his super hot girlfriend
23:32Yeah, let's get super hot
23:34I love it when you agree with me
23:35Um, I'm thinking this
23:39That's what you call super hot?
23:43This looks so good on you
23:45No, no, I've got to have something better
23:46Okay
23:47Mm-mm
23:55No
23:59The call came the second week of September
24:10Three weeks since the last time I'd seen him
24:12It felt like a dream
24:14Unreal
24:16Hey
24:22Hey
24:22I, uh, didn't expect to hear from you
24:26Yeah, is it okay that I'm, that I'm calling?
24:29I shouldn't have called
24:29This was dumb, I'm sorry
24:30No, no, no, no
24:31It's okay
24:31Um
24:32We're still friends, right?
24:35Yeah, yeah
24:35We're friends, yeah
24:37Yeah, and, um
24:39Friends can talk on the phone
24:42Yeah
24:42Yeah, nothing weird about friends talking on the phone
24:46Uh, so how's, how's college life?
24:53Um, it's cool
24:55It's cool
24:56My roommate snores even louder than you do
24:59Which
24:59Oh, come on
25:00I don't snore
25:01Yes, you do
25:02You a thousand percent do
25:03I've heard you through the walls for years
25:04Only when you're really tired, though
25:07How's school for you?
25:11Ugh, boring
25:12Painful
25:12I mean, like
25:14No, no
25:14Who invented Trigg
25:16And why do they torture innocent high school students with it?
25:19Can't be that bad
25:20No, oh
25:21It's, it's bad
25:22It's, it's, it's really bad
25:24I mean, I can't keep up with all the letters
25:26Well, you know, the first thing you gotta do is determine if it's a right angle triangle or not
25:30Bradley, have you seen my, uh, big kettlebell, the 20 pound one?
25:33Steven, I'm on the phone
25:34Well, we'll tell Taylor to go to bed
25:35Hi, Steven
25:36Hey, Conrad
25:41It's not in here
25:45Go away
25:46Sorry about that
25:50Okay, um
25:52What were you saying about triangles again?
25:55Um
25:55So if it's not a running the triangle
25:58Uh, we're not gonna worry about it yet
25:59Uh, so just
26:00Okay, if you want to wear the t-shirt
26:04You know, we should at least crop it
26:06It was Conrad's
26:09You know, every time I think of him, I still
26:11Get this, like, pain in my chest
26:15I know
26:17Sucks, babe
26:19But eventually you're gonna have to let him go
26:22Yeah, I just wish I knew how
26:25It's like my meemaw always used to say
26:27The best way to get over a man is to get under a new one
26:31Heading to a grad party?
26:40Yeah, mine
26:41Me and the guys are throwing it, remember?
26:44Oh, right
26:45Well, have fun
26:46And don't drink and drive
26:48Oh, don't worry
26:49I promised Steven I'd be the sober driver
26:50Oh, and I ordered you a pizza, okay?
26:53So please eat it
26:54Don't worry about me
26:55Go
26:56Bye
26:56I love you
26:57Bye
26:57Bye
26:57Be safe
26:59Bye, I love you
27:00Bye
27:00Oh my god
27:19Milo
27:20Hi
27:21Thank god you're here
27:24Oh my god
27:31Hey, so I need to be able to see you when I'm up on stage
27:33Yeah
27:34Alright, so stay up close
27:35Okay
27:35Yeah
27:36My boy
27:37Yeah
27:38You call this a party?
27:41Where are all the hot ladies you promised?
27:43Uh, we're literally standing right here
27:45Oh, uh, no offense
27:48I'm into older women
27:49Personal preference
27:50Yeah
27:51Hey babe, I'm gonna go help the guys finish something
27:53Okay
27:54Alright
27:54Bye
27:54Bye
27:55Bye
27:56Bye
27:56Okay
28:00Okay
28:00Well, have fun everybody
28:02I gotta go make the rounds
28:04Entertain the people
28:05You know
28:06Post shit
28:07Okay
28:08Come on Spike
28:08You're so cute tonight, you know that?
28:12Come on, let's go get some drinks
28:13I can't drink, I'm fine
28:14Okay
28:15What?
28:19Oh my god, but camp is gonna be so much fun
28:21I bought us all matching PJs
28:24Oh, you are going to need to buy one more set
28:26Guess who finally decides to join us?
28:29The killer B is gonna have her captaincy back from Donna in like no time
28:33You know what I mean?
28:33Yeah, right?
28:35But Coach Shaw, he's okay with it
28:36You know
28:37Come back
28:38I actually haven't talked to Coach yet
28:41I wanted to talk to you guys first
28:42I mean, after last season
28:45I totally don't blame you
28:47If you don't want me back on the team
28:48Oh, shut up
28:49You're always one of us
28:50Yes
28:51Right answer
28:53Bump, set, hit, swipe
28:55That's the way we like to fight
28:57Come on
28:59Come on, team
29:00Let's hear you scream
29:02Here
29:03End for you
29:05There we go
29:06Oh my god
29:07Holy shit
29:10Oh god
29:11It's game point, Ms. Conklin
29:16Bye-bye, Conrad
29:18Hey, you still there?
29:20So
29:21My roommate, Trusky
29:24Oh, did he sleepwalk in his underwear again?
29:26No, he didn't
29:27He didn't, thankfully
29:28But we were talking
29:29And it turns out he's a 5G conspiracist
29:32So apparently
29:33That guy that Katie was seeing
29:35Had a girlfriend
29:36The whole time
29:37I mean, it just sucks
29:38Like
29:38He didn't really seem like the type
29:41You know
29:41Did you know my dad cheated?
29:51Adam cheated on Susanna
29:52Yeah, the first time my mom was sick
29:54He had an affair
29:55With his secretary
29:57Kaylee
29:59I found out about it last spring
30:02I mean, like, the same day
30:04I found out of my mom's cancer coming back
30:06How'd you find out?
30:10Um, I came home early from school one day
30:14And heard them fighting
30:16She was crying so much, Belly
30:22She
30:22I've never heard her cry like that before
30:24So I left
30:28I went back out
30:30I drove around town for two hours
30:31And came back
30:32And pretended not to know anything
30:34I'm so sorry
30:36It sucks that you had to
30:39Carry that secret for so long
30:41Yeah, it's just exhausting
30:43Like
30:44I couldn't turn my brain off
30:47It was like
30:48If you do that
30:49Then this horrible thing is gonna happen
30:52But if you do this
30:53Then, you know
30:54Just this catastrophic thing
30:55Will happen
30:57Oh my God
30:58That sounds so stressful
30:59God damn it
31:06It's two o'clock
31:07You said you had practice earlier
31:09I should let you go
31:09Yeah
31:13Um, off-season workouts suck
31:15But, uh, there's a rumor that
31:18A college scout from Finch
31:19Is coming to watch our club team play this weekend
31:22And there's a chance coach might make me captain
31:24What?
31:25That's crazy
31:26I'll definitely let you go
31:27I didn't know that
31:28Five more minutes
31:31Yeah
31:34Yeah, okay
31:35Yeah
31:35I'll do it
31:37I'm gonna do it
31:38Yeah
31:38Oh, yeah
31:39What are you waiting for?
31:41Good luck
31:44Wow, you're, uh, really good at
31:52Operating a keg
31:54Wow
31:55Hi, Conklin
31:56Oh, um, comment v'on cateney ce pita?
32:00Uh, en paril mortal comme d'habitude
32:03Yeah, good, good
32:04I don't know you took French
32:06Oui
32:07You want one?
32:09No, no, I'm okay, thanks
32:10Uh, I'm the Didi tonight
32:12Cheers
32:14I could spend my life
32:20In this sweet surrender
32:23I could stay lost in this moment
32:28Forever
32:30And every moment spent with you
32:35Is a moment I treasure
32:37I don't wanna close my eyes
32:44I don't wanna fall asleep
32:46Cause I'd miss you, baby
32:48And I don't wanna miss a thing
32:51Do you wanna know something so romantic?
32:53Milo wrote this song for me
32:55It's a cover
32:57Love that song from the movie Armageddon?
33:02Oh
33:03Well, it's still romantic
33:04Okay, wait, don't make me beg you for details
33:07What did you and Corey talk about?
33:09Uh, the book I'm reading
33:11I'm sorry, you suck at talking to guys
33:15Okay, I'm Rusty
33:16And also, he's the one who brought it up
33:18And he spoke to me in French
33:20Bitch, what?
33:21In French?
33:22Okay, that's so hot
33:23Like, he sounds obsessed with you
33:25Yeah, I don't know
33:27I mean, that combo took so much effort
33:29Like, is it supposed to be that hard?
33:33I mean, like, look at you and Milo
33:34You guys just make sense
33:36Well, Milo and I are soulmates
33:41I fall asleep cause I miss you, baby
33:44And I don't wanna miss a thing
33:47Cause even when I dream of you
33:49The sweetest dream would never do
33:53I still miss you, baby
33:55And I don't wanna miss a thing
33:58Woo!
34:03Woo!
34:04Woo!
34:04Woo!
34:05Woo!
34:05Woo!
34:05Woo!
34:05Woo!
34:05Woo!
34:07Woo!
34:07Woo!
34:08Woo!
34:08Woo!
34:09Woo!
34:09Woo!
34:09Woo!
34:10Woo!
34:10Woo!
34:11Woo!
34:11Woo!
34:11Woo!
34:23Woo!
34:24Woo!
34:24Woo!
34:25Woo!
34:26Woo!
34:26Woo!
34:27Woo!
34:27Can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk?
34:31I didn't mean to call you that
34:37Can't remember what was said or what you threw at me
34:41Please tell me, please tell me why
34:48Belly, I'm going to crowd surf. Hold my shirt for a second and make sure no one spills anything on it.
34:54Ew, Steven, no, I don't want to hold your bloody t-shirt.
34:57Woo!
34:59Yeah!
35:00What the hell?
35:01Are you okay?
35:03Belly, I'm sorry.
35:04No, yeah, no, I'm good. I'm totally fine.
35:06I'm just, um, I'm going to go get a drink.
35:11Well, you're my sober driver, Belly Bells. Don't let me down!
35:15Steven!
35:16It's no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy.
35:21I had this weird thought today.
35:25Yeah? I love weird thoughts.
35:28I was thinking, if my dad had cheated on my mom, she probably wouldn't have even cared.
35:37Is that hard?
35:38No, but you really think Laurel wouldn't have a reaction?
35:41I mean, kinda.
35:43Like, nothing about my dad ever excited her.
35:46You know?
35:47They were, like, never romantic around each other.
35:49And you want to see your parents being romantic?
35:51Maybe.
35:53Maybe.
35:55I mean, I just can't imagine marrying someone who didn't give me fireworks.
36:01You know, like, like electric jolts every time I saw them.
36:06Were you surprised when you found out your parents were getting divorced?
36:09Uh, yes and no.
36:11I mean, I always thought divorce meant fighting, you know?
36:16And there was none of that.
36:17I mean, they were cold for a little while, but, um...
36:21Now everything's kind of back to normal.
36:24In a weird way, that must almost be a little harder to understand.
36:29Exactly.
36:33Oh, wow.
36:34What?
36:36I don't know.
36:38Just never sent any of this to anyone before.
36:42Me either.
36:46Hey, can I ask you something?
36:49Anything.
36:51Um, how's...
36:53How's Jer?
36:53Is he...
36:54Is he doing okay?
36:55Um, yeah.
36:56Yeah, he seems good.
36:57Why?
36:58I don't know.
36:59I've texted him a few times since summer ended, and, uh...
37:02He never writes back.
37:04Yeah, no.
37:04I mean, he's probably just busy with senior year stuff.
37:07Right, right, right.
37:08Or, you know, it's that he'll never get over what I did and hold it against me for the rest of our lives.
37:12Belly.
37:13I can't prove mine.
37:14Forget I said anything.
37:23I learned something kind of cool.
37:25Tell me.
37:26Did you know that Venus is an evening star for 263 days out of the year?
37:34And then it disappears from the sky for 50 days before returning as a morning star for another 263 days?
37:41I did not know that.
37:43That is very cool.
37:44And right now it's an evening star.
37:46It's really bright next to the moon.
37:49I'm actually looking at it right now.
37:50It's probably against the rules to say this, but, um...
37:58I wish we were looking at it together.
38:06Me too.
38:14And Belly?
38:17Yes, Comet?
38:17I couldn't be with someone who didn't make me feel electric, either.
38:22I don't know if I was a man who didn't make me feel electric, but I didn't mean to call you that.
38:43Yeah.
38:48Hey.
38:49Hey, Conklin.
38:51Hey.
38:51Long time no see, huh?
38:53Yeah.
38:53No, I know.
38:54It's been ages, right?
38:55Yeah.
38:56Is that seat-taking?
38:58Uh, nope.
38:59Nope.
38:59I'm right ahead.
39:00I wonder if Venus is a morning star or an evening star tonight.
39:12I think Venus is a planet.
39:14No, actually, uh, ancient astronomers, um...
39:18You know what?
39:20Never mind.
39:21Okay.
39:22It's dumb.
39:22All right.
39:24You know, you can hardly see any stars this close to the city, anyway.
39:28There's a lot more by the beach.
39:30I, uh, used to spend every summer at this beach in Massachusetts.
39:36Hmm.
39:39Are you going this summer?
39:41Uh, nope.
39:42No, I'm not.
39:44So then you'll be here for the 4th, huh?
39:46Okay.
39:48Well, my folks are gonna be out of town, and I'll just think about having a few people over.
39:52You and your friends should totally come.
39:54That-that sounds cool.
39:56All right.
39:56Cool.
40:00Come here.
40:02You kind of have something.
40:03Here.
40:03All right.
40:04Yeah.
40:04Uh, Belly, no, I was just...
40:09Oh, my God!
40:10No, I was just...
40:11You had something in your...
40:11I have something in your...
40:12You know why?
40:13Because I just...
40:14It's crap.
40:14Because I just got kicked in the head.
40:15That's right.
40:15Holy shit.
40:16But no, no, no, I'm totally fine.
40:18I'm just, um...
40:19I'm gonna go.
40:19Okay.
40:20See ya.
40:20Yeah, yeah, yeah.
40:21Um, hey, hey, Belly, actually.
40:23Yeah.
40:23Can you do me a favor?
40:25Could you put in a good word for me with, uh, your friend Marcy?
40:30Yeah.
40:31With Marcy?
40:32Yeah.
40:32Yes.
40:32And you.
40:33Yeah, that'd be great.
40:34Yeah, I totally will.
40:35You guys...
40:35Cool.
40:36It's really...
40:36Thank you for this.
40:37Yes.
40:38Okay, bye.
40:38Belly.
40:48Belly, come here.
40:51Hey, sis.
40:52Sis, sis, sis.
40:52Check it out.
40:53Check it out.
40:53Check it out.
40:55Oh!
40:55Oh!
40:56Oh, my God.
40:57Oh, my God.
40:59I can't believe you did that.
41:01This party sucks.
41:02Dude, it's beer, man.
41:04It'll dry.
41:04Chill.
41:06I'm leaving, okay?
41:07Wait.
41:08Wait, did something happen?
41:09No, nothing happened.
41:10Whatever.
41:11Uh, Stephen, can you just get Spike to drive you home, please?
41:14Spike?
41:15No, Spike is drunk.
41:16You promised to be my sober ride tonight.
41:19Okay, well, I'm ready to go now.
41:21Okay, well, I'm not.
41:22Great thing.
41:22Can you just call an Uber or something?
41:24Why are you being such a buzzkill right now?
41:26Oh, I'm sorry.
41:27Am I ruining your fun night, Mr. Perfect Valedictorian?
41:30Kinda, yeah.
41:31Okay, well, in case you forgot, which it clearly seems like you did, Susanna just died, so I'm a
41:36little bit sad, but please don't let that stop you from having the time of your life.
41:40Fuck you.
41:41You know, I lost Susanna, too.
41:43Okay, you don't think I'm sad about that?
41:45Oh, what, were you crowd-serving the pain away?
41:47My apologies.
41:47No, you should apologize.
41:49You screwed up and now everything is weird with Conrad and Jeremiah.
41:52I mean, they won't even text me back anymore because of you.
41:54Okay, guys, wait a second.
41:55That is not my fault.
41:56Isn't it?
41:58Hmm?
41:58I should be celebrating with them tonight, but they wouldn't come because you made things
42:03messy.
42:05You had Jeremiah, and it just wasn't enough.
42:07You had to have Conrad, too.
42:10God, you are so fucking selfish.
42:12Steven!
42:13What?
42:13Serious?
42:13I had to have Conrad.
42:15Are you kidding?
42:17I was in love, Steven.
42:19Like, out of my mind in love.
42:20What was I supposed to do?
42:24Belly.
42:26Belly.
42:27Steven.
42:31Hey.
42:34Steven is a drunk idiot right now.
42:36Please do not listen to him.
42:37No, he's right.
42:38I mean, I ruined things with both of them, and then Susanna died, and I completely ruined
42:43her funeral, and I just, I wish I hadn't started any of it.
42:45No, you don't.
42:46Yes, I do.
42:46No, you don't.
42:47Yes, I do, and I'm so tired of feeling sad all the time, and I just, I don't think I
42:52get to feel better.
42:53You think that right now, but I promise you.
42:55No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
42:57Nothing is promised.
42:58You can't promise anything.
43:00I'm sorry.
43:01I'm sorry.
43:01I just, I know you're trying your best.
43:03Because I don't, I don't expect anyone to understand what I'm, I'm going through right
43:09now, and I think I just have to deal with it alone.
43:18I'm gonna go home.
43:19Okay.
43:20I can come with you.
43:20No, no, no, no.
43:21You stay.
43:22I mean, it's your boyfriend's debut, and I just, I just need to go to bed.
43:28Okay.
43:29Will you text me when you get home, please?
43:31Yeah.
43:32I love you.
43:33I love you.
44:03I love you.
44:04I got my driver's license last week, just like we always talked about, because you were
44:11so excited for me to finally drive up to your house.
44:16But today I drove through the suburbs, but today I drove through the suburbs, crying because
44:21you weren't around.
44:23All my friends are tired of hearing how much I miss you, but I kind of feel sorry for them, because
44:36they'll never know you the way that I do.
44:39And I know you the way that I was driving home to you, and I know we weren't perfect.
44:52But I've never felt this way for no one.
44:57Oh, and I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone.
45:08I guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me.
45:15You said forever, now I drive alone past your street.
45:20You said forever, now I drive alone past your street.
45:26Hey.
45:27Hey.
45:28Happy almost Halloween.
45:29Conrad.
45:30I know I'm not supposed to be here, but I'm... here.
45:35I brought candy.
45:55Do you want me to go?
46:00don't wait just um what what are you doing here um i wanted to see you so yeah yeah um
46:12you know but i thought right no i know i know you you were worried about jared but look i had
46:18a chance to talk to him and he's doing really good actually he's um doing on dates you know
46:25and um he's been on this high ever since he got made homecoming came that's great so um he's over yeah
46:32i think he is
46:36ellie i don't think i could ever get over you
46:43i mean i'm not i'm here
46:47but whenever i talk to you i'm just happy
46:52and i gotta say standing in front of you right now it's torture not being able to kiss you
46:58belly we need to talk
47:04belly we need to talk
47:10i'm kind of tired sit down
47:32you didn't eat your guidance counselor emailed me
47:43i didn't know you lost your volleyball captaincy or that your grades were so bad
47:47yeah i'm sorry i'm not getting into princeton like stephen that's not what i'm saying you can do
47:53better than this i'm really disappointed in you sorry mom you know susanna died remember you don't
47:59get to use susanna's death as an excuse this whole year has been hard for me too you were barely here
48:06and i don't blame you for being there for susanna and the boys they needed you but you can't blame me
48:11either for things that happened because you were away this isn't about blame this is about you and
48:16the choices you made it's about taking responsibility for yourself even when things are hard life keeps
48:22going you can't just give up you want to talk about taking responsibility you won't even promote
48:28your book because you refuse to talk about susanna you can't just suddenly be concerned about volleyball
48:34when you haven't gone to a single one of my games this year i waited all year for you to step up
48:40and be a parent you gave up way before i did
48:55you have to do that at every stop it is kicking up my gag reflex if you'd rather walk we can let you
49:01out right here i'd probably be safer honestly hey you don't gotta worry man i'm fully sober
49:09fucking belly man taking my car and and leaving me straight into my own party who who does that
49:15hmm i don't know who yells at their own sister in front of everyone for being sad she yelled at me
49:21first okay so mature of you steven how about you try some compassion next time asshole aren't you
49:27supposed to like come together and grief life cannot be separated from death wow so helpful man thank
49:37you milo's very in touch with his emotions that's what makes him a great musician um thanks babe you know
49:46i actually have a record label interested in siamese what yeah check it out cancel culture records
49:57babe they only have one post yes that's what's so punk about it yeah dude congrats man congrats
50:16my darling steven congratulations on your graduation this is the start of what is sure to be an
50:33exceptional journey i wish i could be there to watch you shine but you have an extraordinary mom who will
50:41be with you every step of the way remember the world is not only happening to you but you are
50:49happening to the world and don't forget to enjoy the ride love suzanna
51:11hey i know it's late but about the bookseller event i changed my mind i'll do it
51:28i knew i knew i'd lose suzanna eventually
51:40i just didn't know i'd end up losing all of them
51:44in my memory the three of them will always be entwined forever linked there can't be one without the
51:51others
51:59now they're all gone
52:04the words that you whisper were just us to know you told me you love me so why did you go
52:18so
52:41Billy?
52:52Hi, Jeremiah. I'm so glad...
52:54Are you with Conrad?
52:57Uh, no. Why would I be with Conrad?
52:59I don't know. I just thought maybe you guys would...
53:01Jerry, what is going on?
53:07Conrad's gone.
53:09Wait, what do you mean, gone?
53:12He's not answering my texts or picking up my calls.
53:15Since when?
53:16Yesterday.
53:18I mean, isn't he in the middle of finals?
53:19Maybe he pulled an all-nighter at the library.
53:21No, no, I don't think so.
53:23Apparently, he told this from me that everything is fucked,
53:25and then he just took off.
53:28I think I'm gonna go to Brown in the morning
53:29and see if I can track him down.
53:31I'll never get Susanna back.
53:33But I can't let Jeremiah and Conrad go, too.
53:36Okay.
53:39But I'm coming with you.
53:40I saw you dancing in a crowded room
53:49You look so happy, but I'm not with you
53:53But then you saw me, caught you by surprise
53:58A single tear drop falling from your eyes
54:02I don't know why
54:04I won't run away
54:07I'll make you cry when I run away
54:15Take me back, cause I wanna stay
54:22Sing your tears for another day
54:26Save your tears for another day
54:32Save your tears for another day
54:36Tears for another day
54:39I'll make you cry when I run away
54:56Save your tears for another day
55:03Save your tears for another day
55:13Save your tears for another day
55:23Save your tears for another day
55:33Save your tears for another day
55:37Save your tears for another day
55:39Save your tears for another day
55:43Save your tears for another day
55:45Save your tears for another day
55:47Save your tears for another day
55:49Save your tears for another day
55:51Save your tears for another day
55:53Save your tears for another day
55:55Save your tears for another day
55:57Save your tears for another day
55:59Save your tears for another day
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