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Inside The Cult Of The Jesus Army S01E01 - Full Movie
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00:00I'm here to support you okay the purpose of this is to support you in the process
00:18of facing up to what happened to you it's about you telling me your experience and
00:26me bringing my knowledge and understanding of cults and spiritual abuse so we're not
00:35debunking personal faith that's not what this is about this is about debunking the cult from
00:43a psychological perspective and how spirituality and faith actually were used to control
00:56all of us need to understand the process of what we've been through in order not to repeat it
01:07I've seen it happen with others who've left cults they end up in a different cult
01:13how's that sarah yeah how are you doing
01:19it's hard
01:24you must bring yourself to a new commitment and you shall know what it is to be on fire for
01:46your lord when the jesus army marches to war their message is high pressure and hard line join
02:00the army or be damned
02:15i want you
02:31i want you i want you to be mine
02:37surrender the middle part of you an awful power of sin learns there now we give
03:03our genitals for jesus
03:10down the trumpet shall the gospel jesus christ is high
03:30bug book is an unpretentious north hamptonshire village but the very english picture painted
03:36by its local church and congregation has been challenged by a local group of unorthodox christians
03:43they're talking in different tongues now that's a thing i never understood because you can't speak another language unless you're taught it
04:00singing singing singing at the top of the voices that's not being neighborly is it clapping
04:07and stamping feet and in and age in and age you'd never think it was a place of worship
04:13we've only got to look at them to see what type of people is encouraging here they're not the village people certainly
04:21back in the early 70s i had heard there was
04:27inverted commas something going on at this place called bug brook which is a little village near northampton
04:35pastor of the chapel there had established a church that was very very different
04:52it was a completely new form of christianity becoming visible particularly in america at the time
05:02and they were all centered around a much more vibrant form of worship
05:08there were people talking in tongues there and apparently they felt that they could actually feel god inside of them
05:27of them and I wanted to find out if this was true or not when I first started I
05:44mean I just saw it as a as a radical church you know it seemed like the good
05:51idea I suppose I mean in those days it was still quite a stigma to be a single mum
06:06I'd gone to some other churches and nobody sort of spoken to me at all
06:12but when I first went to the chapel I'd got there a little bit late and they were already
06:19worshipping inside as I entered I don't know what it was whether it was Jesus but I just felt
06:32that this was where I was supposed to be
06:34come my brothers and sisters in the Lord the fullness of Jesus rightly belongs to us
07:01I'd heard a lot about this person Noel Stanton
07:19that everybody was
07:22in awe of him you're our brother and sister in Jesus you belong with us in the family of
07:28the Lord and that old world that old nature and all the world that was attaching to that old nature
07:36now dies amen
07:45Noel was conscripted into the navy
07:50it was there it was there that he became a Christian after that he started running his own
08:00stationary business in Bedford but he also at the same time became a lay pastor at Bugbrook
08:11Noel actually for a long time before the community started he was like a conventional Christian
08:21but then in the late 60s he was visited by God and he received the Holy Spirit it was very powerful
08:30it really profoundly affected him
08:35Jesus who said your heavenly father will give the Holy Spirit for those who ask him
08:41will give will give oh yes I've proved it I proved it four and a half years ago when I said father according to that word of Jesus I ask you now to give me the Holy Spirit
08:55and in an overwhelming fashion he surely did when I encountered Noel for the first time
09:04he claimed that he was a prophet speaking God's will
09:09and he picked up his Bible and and and and started slapping it I'm fed up of this weak-kneed
09:19lamby-pamby
09:21pamby christianity that's around us don't be so
09:27measly and feeble and then he said right brethren he said shall we make the earth tremble
09:34and and everybody started to sing with full voice
09:49it really did feel as if the very walls and ceiling were vibrating
09:57it felt thunderous
10:04and
10:05by the end of the chorus
10:09I had my hand up in the air along with everybody else
10:12but of course I had no idea really that there was something extremely manipulative about all of this
10:30because from now on for all of us it wasn't just the case of going to church it was a case of
10:38belonging to church
10:49so
10:50one thing I'm just going to say so important to really kind of use this c word
10:58call a cult a cult
11:00okay
11:02a cult exhibits great or excessive devotion
11:05to some person idea or thing
11:23Noel was like revered when he said yeah yeah so he's the person
11:27yeah
11:28of danton yeah so it's a great and we were devoted to him you were in his message yeah yeah yeah
11:36that was a big focus wasn't it that whole kind of
11:39yeah discipleship yeah i even had a photo of noel under my bed for ages
11:45so here we start ticking boxes
11:48dangerous leaders make important decisions about converts lives money dress personal possessions
11:54they cut themselves off either geographically or socially
12:00they perceive there's only one way forward all of that is weird it's really weird
12:06that was noel yeah he was exactly that basically
12:13yeah yeah it's fucking weird
12:24the lord has told us to move into a community to divide our possessions living in separate houses
12:31yes but belonging to one another as a true family loving at one another caring for one another sharing
12:37with one another that's the way it's blessed it's powerful it's working it's beautiful
12:54in an attempt to return to the lifestyle practiced by the early church
12:58a small nucleus of people have given their homes and all personal wealth to the new community
13:13the money given in by all the members has been used to buy properties where community members live together
13:19do you actually miss the privacy that having your own home would give you oh no not really
13:27we find that we have any privacy that we need
13:31when i moved in to new creation farm there was this real hum of excitement
13:37and almost immediately everything seemed different
13:53my mum she was trying to live in a way that she thought was
13:59the way god wanted us to live our lives
14:02and in a way i get it
14:11to begin with max she was full of beans
14:16little bundle of joy she was
14:20this pretty farmhouse is home for about 20 community members
14:25parents children single people all live under the same roof
14:31there was loads about sheepfold i loved
14:35as kids it was an amazing place
14:38there was just fields that we could all go and run and play in
14:42and we used to go and pick goosebreeze together
14:44so it wasn't only bad stuff there was really cool stuff as well
14:54when you went into the community you're giving up your earthly aspirations really
15:03you know we would be living as the early christians did
15:07so you shared things and had everything in common you just distributed them as people had need
15:13it sounds totally innocent doesn't it
15:20to begin with everything seemed wonderful
15:25i just felt such a peace and it obviously attracted quite a lot of young people
15:33they all greeted me as bro hi bro it's lovely to have you here
15:40it's like if you know you're going to live with someone for eternity
15:50yeah if you know that that forever they're going to be loving you for eternity
15:55and you might as well just just start start realizing that now
15:58to describe it as an idyllic dreamy kind of atmosphere is absolutely spot on
16:11it's almost like going on a trip the whole vision and the whole idea was one that
16:19was very separate from the world it was it genuinely a hundred percent like a fairy tale it was just beautiful
16:25it's just beautiful
16:35mags and me and mum moved in when i was about eight i was so excited
16:42sheepfold it was like this huge house honestly i just thought this was like being a princess in a castle
16:50there were lots of other families moving in as well so we've got kids to play with all the time
16:57but the first thing that i remember really well we'd moved all our stuff and i was like oh mum where
17:04are all my toys um because i'd got this you know i was quite obsessed with my dolls and
17:11my rather nice little dolls house that i had and um and mum said well i've given all your toys away
17:22because uh we don't have toys in the community they're just gone they hadn't you know there was no
17:29warning no nothing they're just gone i mean for me it wasn't anything weird because it was all i ever
17:35knew but there was loads of it it was really not whatever normal is it's like far from normal
17:54we moved it and just before my eighth birthday
17:57my parents wanted to be around other christians where we can all grow up together in a morally
18:05conscious environment committing everything that we had as a family to the church
18:16and you don't understand that as a child
18:18we moved into the house next door by a couple of fields to where noel lived
18:28so we were very tightly overseen by noel um you could feel his influence actually he didn't need to be
18:38there he used to preach a lot about spiritual family that was what was important not the natural
18:46family because the natural family i suppose were your link to your old self and that was a big no-no
19:04so you didn't have family time really you didn't just have time with your mum
19:09it's a very extreme environment to grow up in it was dangerous actually when you think about it
19:25you know as a child it's stripping a person away from everything you need the support
19:32that's so true like yeah but yeah my mum wasn't around so it was cutting you off from family and not
19:42and the family being the church rather than being me my mum and my sister
19:49cool you know never used to like tea when i was little but jesus makes you less fussy doesn't he he does
19:55the leadership of the community is all male an elder lives in each community home and all problems
20:03and decisions are shared with him elders are to be found in all our houses and our households they
20:10are to be shepherds of the flock of christ they are the ministers of the flock of christ
20:14all right in in any situation like living together in a house you have got to have people who sort out
20:27things i was initially made what's called a leading serving brother lsb which always amused me because
20:35of my electronics background in electronics lsb stands for least significant bit
20:40so all right there's something of a need for humility and being called an lsb sort of it clicked with me
21:00it's easy to see only the rules but in the early days no had very much a vision for
21:08uh being god's people
21:18if noel had had a particular topic that he was speaking about that week everybody every brother
21:25would be on that thing no sugar no one's to have sugar sugar's the devil and and not being able to
21:32refrain from doing something's a devil and you have to be able to control yourself so no sugar anybody
21:38one of the things we we realized we didn't want to have large amounts of bits and pieces and we
21:44didn't want to get distracted by things like television so we didn't have televisions and we
21:48didn't have radios a pat lunch is worldly wearing fashionable clothes is worldly a bag of crisps how worldly
21:57and worldly stuff wasn't to be included or invited in because that was inviting the devil in literally
22:07inviting the devil in
22:09the battle is between satan and god satan and jesus
22:22what do you mean i mean satan is working in everybody who's not not he's working in the world
22:28uh and and and i mean you can tell just look at the state of the place
22:40every single night sat room like this somebody would be playing guitar somebody else would be
22:47speaking in tongues and there would be people who looked possessed and i remember these brothers all
22:56coming and like laying hands on them
23:00everybody speaking in tongues really louder and no yelling the devil
23:05exorcisms were quite frequent noel was one of these people who would quite easily sort of point out
23:17a demon in somebody people would throw up some people would convulse on the floor
23:23you don't know what it is and you're trying to rationalize it as a child
23:39one day i was drawing stick people with willies and boobs i've no idea why it's just something you
23:47do as a child sometimes and it was deemed that i had an unclean spirit and how old were you seven
24:05i can remember it clearly
24:08the elder of our household he used to put his hand his my head used to fit perfectly into his hand and he
24:16just used to sort of push down on it so i couldn't move
24:23it was really frightening
24:29i don't actually want to talk about that too much
24:31what is an interject an interject is a belief or behavior which you've taken into yourself that
24:50remains sitting in your psychological system like a lump of untewed and undigested food in your gut
24:58my thing that stuck with me is i'm possessed you know that i've got a demonic spirit in me i'm the devil
25:07that's taking everybody's eye off what they should be concentrating on and you know that needs to be
25:14taken out of me how dare they tell a little girl that she's possessed how dare they tell any of you
25:23that interject is still stuck in your stomach undigested poisoning you and i think we need to go i
25:33haven't got a demon they were controlling me they were abusing me by telling me these things
25:40for many people the control and living in conformity with the rules was incredibly difficult
25:59i shared a room at the farm with a guy called steve who would stay up till the early hours of the
26:08morning reading reading reading was considered to be a bit of a heady individualistic pursuit
26:17and i heard him arguing with noel on a couple of occasions i heard raised voices and i came out of
26:26my room to see what was going on and noel was stood by his bedroom door calling for steve to come
26:34back but steve just put his hand up dismissively in the air and and marched off but it is indicative in
26:46this case of of somebody who was unhappy i know that because he told me about it
26:54and it proved to be steve's last night with us actually
27:07somebody rang and told me that his body had been found on the railway track and that he was knocked
27:15over by a train so i immediately asked if i said oh has he committed suicide and and i was told i shouldn't
27:28be thinking such thoughts because of course he hadn't committed suicide um it had just been a terrible accident
27:37this was the public statement if you like from the community
27:49although the coroner now says that there is no evidence to support criticism of the sect his
27:55concern was based on the fact that in addition to steven's gruesome death there was an unusual
28:00coincidence of another death in unusual circumstances 18 months ago in this case another member of the
28:06sect was found lying naked in the garden in december and he died from exposure
28:16well it was cut-reaching the initial thought was it's gone so my praying and nothing to worry about
28:26i don't think anybody knows what happened or why it happened
28:29the circumstances of both deaths are just a mystery which raises questions really
28:42the new creation christian community has aroused its fair share of criticism there's a natural suspicion
28:48of any such highly committed and insular group of people who claim to have found the true way to god
28:54such ecstasy must surely have a flaw very very gradually through the years he has increased his evangelism
29:04until it became aggressive and that's when i skipped out i know what goes on
29:18the community members have bought an old hotel and some of the county's more elegant homes
29:32the community uses the skills of its members in several businesses
29:36a company called skano does all the building work on community properties there's a chain of health food
29:42shops called the house of goodness limited we were growing really fast at that point
29:50various articles were made about us because we were something unusual but of course the fear of the
29:57unknown i think is very very real i see a cult i know they're saying all the time that they're not a cult
30:07but i do see a cult an enclosed cult which exists for itself i mean there are people who want to dub us
30:15a cult uh but we are very orthodox we're a church we're a genuine christian church as the evangelical
30:23alliance have said we are a genuine christian church yes noel was a very dominating character
30:32however i'm against jesus fellowship being called a cult after all it sprang out of the baptist church
30:41and the baptist church has got uh nationally has got a structure we are people of historic christianity
30:48we recognize and and churches in general recognize that we belong to the church of christ throughout the
30:56world and and therefore of course we completely deny any suggestion that we are a cult in the
31:02way the word is now accepted our good does get evil spoken of there are false allegations and
31:09the like but we believe our testimony will win through
31:20oh god i have so many many sins
31:24but listen if we confess our sins god here are my many many many sins but god i don't want the
31:35things of the world anymore you must bring yourself to a new commitment to jesus you must be hundred percent his
31:54so
31:56at that point the thing that developed very interestingly was that
32:06celibacy became more and more something which noel encouraged
32:13he said that in the world in general there was far too much intimacy
32:24surrender the middle part of you many of us here
32:33will have to accept that an awful hour of sin
32:38looked there but now we give our genitals to jesus
32:53when i became celibate i was one of the earlier people to commit to that
33:01it was just presented as an option and then it grew into something else
33:08it did become the foundation for nol in a way and so it was a kind of a tick box
33:17for brothers to get elevated up the ranks
33:23in my case i was 24. i had this experience with a with a girl i was going out with
33:30um before i joined the church it wasn't a great relationship really
33:39so you know i wasn't an experienced exponent of you know
33:44i was probably in my early 20s
33:53in fact i'm a peculiarity uh having basically
33:57uh joined the community when i was 18 and um been so introverted before i was 18 i've never had a
34:04girlfriend so here i am 65 years old and i've never had a girlfriend all right
34:10um you know which in many ways must make me a bit bit unique but that is me and i i am what god has made me in that sense
34:21and of course noel himself was a single celibate
34:28celibate
34:28celibacy was for life
34:34for life but it wasn't just a case of holiness
34:41it went beyond that it it was far more
34:46to do with the control of people
34:54and in fact from now on relationships between brothers and sisters would be something that
35:00was entirely monitored and and regulated
35:16it got to the point where within the household men would sleep down one end of the house women would
35:24sleep at the other end and generally
35:28men and women didn't fraternize it's almost like there was a complete vacuum
35:33there with regards to anything of a sexual nature
35:39and i think that was a projection from noel actually
35:42in a sexual sense he was an incredibly mixed up
35:50insecure person i myself encountered noel
35:58either in his underclothes or just wearing a bath towel
36:05and having younger brothers sat next to him
36:08on the bed which i thought was
36:17it unsettled me
36:21looking back i can say
36:25he was struggling i think with his sexuality
36:28and perhaps you know he was fighting against those tendencies
36:38how that came out at the time it was obvious
36:44anger
36:45i remember he used to work himself up into these massive rants where he used to like rage at everybody
37:06more and more noel absolutely hit the roof
37:13he used to get so irate and for some reason it was often young people
37:22i just remember every single night
37:29noel ranting sweating ranting and telling you about hell's fire and
37:35if you allowed the children to be swept away
37:39sometimes he'd shout so hard at the veins on his neck would just
37:44stand out it was horrific you know he just hated us
37:54and as time went past the way in which children in the community were treated
38:03became more and more extreme
38:07in all of the households birch sticks were kept hidden
38:21but we we all knew where they were
38:29it was preached that you spare the rod and spoil the child
38:32i do remember a lot of roddings maybe not as many as max you know my sister she was rotted from the age of two
38:45how how often were you disciplined do you remember
38:51i reckon every day
38:55or almost every day
38:56all of the children were rotted
39:03you would get disciplined because somebody a brother
39:07there has decided that something you've just done was defiant that's what i remember hearing a lot that i was being defiant
39:17one particular occasion we're in the bedroom um and um
39:23um mum was mum was disciplining mags she was about two and she was whacking her with a stick and
39:31magsy was just screaming and screaming and screaming and i just um so i like buried myself under the covers
39:38like covered my ears and like ruffled my feet to make noise with the with the bedsheets to try and block out
39:45the sound of this screaming baby
39:56i mean it wasn't
39:58i don't know it's it's difficult
40:01really i mean when you've got everybody together
40:04you know and everyone's looking
40:06you know you you it's it's it's difficult
40:11because i was a single mum and had no husband
40:16everybody or all the brothers thought it was their place to point out to me what they thought my child
40:24should or shouldn't be doing i mean the the elders would take decisions for my children you know and
40:30uh i found that really difficult how do you feel sort of overall it's affected your relationship with your mum
40:43um i haven't really ever spoken to her about how how it made me feel
40:52it's like the elephant in the room that you never talk about you just sort of politely skirt around
41:00but you kind of feel like you wanted to be more protected
41:12i've never been in any doubt that my mum really loves me and she's oh she's a good person and she
41:19of course she was doing it because she thought it was the right thing to do but the bit that gives me
41:24rage is the bit that's like that was your choice i didn't choose any of this yet children were
41:32anybody's sorry they were anybody's we were open to whoever and that as horrible as a pill that is for
41:40our parents to swallow that's the facts it's tricky
41:46but the key to successful brainwashing is to keep the subject unaware that they're being manipulated and
41:56controlled i've used the analogy of the frog in boiling water you know you a frog if you heat it up
42:04it's horrible but if you heat it up slowly it doesn't know it's being heated up and boiled alive so and
42:11i think there is an element of that happening so to your parents the punishment is justified as being
42:19necessary to cleanse this so-called sin the doctrine is more important than the individual's well-being
42:32what noel stanton seems to have created is a state within a state
42:37an apparently benevolent totalitarian system where the interests of the individual are subjugated to
42:42the interests of the majority
42:56all their businesses have grown out of their community needs there's a builder's merchants
43:00and a plumbing and decorating business which service their houses
43:06there's a firm of solicitors and a doctor's surgery of five gps
43:14in their heyday those businesses were regularly turning in profits
43:20and so that was giving us a very very good financial base which to work
43:25i pray for sales and i get my prayers answered
43:32and so do the rest of the staff
43:36i believe god loves this and i believe he wants to help us
43:39in the 80s there was a big expansion
43:59and i think the power if you have power there's that saying isn't there you know all power corrupts
44:06i think it does i'm a christian with power and i think as time went by um there were more and more controls
44:20with noel it was the natural progression of his personality which was
44:25so it's sort of like controlling bullying maybe
44:29and so in that name was above every other name the name of jesus christ who is lord
44:36now we baptize you jesus
44:39tonight we talked to members of britain's foremost religious sect are they here to give salvation or has
44:56that operation an altogether more sinister feel john everett you were involved for five years
45:03and then you left and suffered a nervous breakdown didn't you i i left the community because i had grown
45:11to believe that they were exhibiting characteristics which i began to associate with cultishness
45:19in the campus
45:29there were several key factors involved with my decision to leave
45:36there was the whole business of having one man at the helm with so much authority
45:44of course the way in which children in the community were treated
45:52and as time passed I became really angry
45:58and at that point I thought
46:02I need for the sake of people who might be drawn in
46:08I need to make known what I know about the community
46:14so in the first instance I wrote quite a long manuscript
46:21it was actually picked up by the Baptist Union and the Evangelical Alliance
46:28and I had meetings with them
46:32I think there's a real issue about the way the church was being administered
46:38there was an unhealthy emphasis on celibacy
46:42there was a concern that children may be being put in a more pressured situation than was helpful
46:49and that an excessive discipline might be being used
46:52when people spoke to the press
47:07the Judas word would get mentioned quite a bit
47:24and so I was the first formal excommunicant of the community
47:35nobody was allowed to talk to me
47:38or have anything to do with me
47:40because I'd become the enemy
47:43alright yes to be able to say we're part of the Evangelical Alliance was helpful
47:54we did want to maintain what connections we could with other Christian organisations
47:59but internally I think our desire was far more to be acknowledged by God
48:09than to be acknowledged by human organisations
48:10do not trust in the weakness of man
48:16we're in a fight
48:18we're in a fight
48:18we're in a fight
48:18we're in a fight
48:19will you take Jesus into the kind of church that he desires
48:27will you dare you
48:30and so a Jesus army was formed
48:35blow the trumpet
48:37move on
48:40advance
48:41join the fight
48:44when the Jesus army marches to war their battle is for hearts and minds
48:49and their message is high pressure and hard line
48:53join the army
48:54or be damned
48:55we're looking for a new Britain
49:05new Britain morally
49:07you see we live in a nation where
49:09there's all sorts of sexual permissive problems and the like
49:12every kind of moral problem
49:13when Jesus army came in
49:16there was this element of kind of
49:20how do you say this in a nice way
49:23up yours to the establishment
49:25just let the spirit fall upon you
49:28let's be revolutionists
49:52we've got to promote the Christian gospel in a fairly militant form today
49:57after all evil's on the march
49:59today the debate surrounding one of the most active new religious groups
50:03the Jesus army
50:04to some they're a dangerous cult
50:06to others they're a radical movement which changes lives
50:10this Jesus army is something that
50:14well frankly it disgusts me
50:17these Rambo jackets
50:20the uniform they have chosen is the uniform of force
50:24Jesus army was in one sense deliberately promoted
50:29as being up front in your face
50:32but one of the aspects I think of the Jesus army manifesto
50:37was to go where others don't go
50:39reaching those right on the outskirts of society
50:43whether it be drug addicts
50:45or those homeless
50:48you know reaching out into various
50:51the gay situations
50:53and things like that at times as well
50:56Barbara I just pray that you will work powerfully
51:10to show them that there is sin within them Lord God
51:15cause them to come to this bus Lord Jesus
51:18cause them to find out what's going on inside them right now Lord
51:21cause them to find out why they're so uncomfortable Lord Jesus
51:25I was probably about 13 or 14 the first time I was told to go evangelising
51:36I felt a lot of pressure actually
51:40it was drummed into us that this was the only way to gain redemption
51:45to go to heaven
51:47and sometimes it can be quite scary
51:51because you get people who were off their heads
51:54it really was the lion's den
51:56particularly for children
51:59it's great to be able to have the resources
52:19to be able to
52:20doing something that actually changed people
52:22that actually helped people directly
52:23I don't think there was
52:33any kind of randomness in it
52:35I think with Noel
52:37everything was a tool
52:38that was
52:40used for a purpose
52:43it's been a good night's work
53:00three people are travelling back to the farm for the weekend
53:03Steve from London
53:13Steve from London picked him up last night from Leicester Square
53:16we don't know much about his background
53:17anyway bless you Steve
53:19good to see you
53:20are you glad to be here?
53:21yep sure am
53:22we haven't got too many rules here
53:25we just want to be like Jesus
53:34and move in peace and love
53:36we believe in Jesus Christ
53:42to save your heart
53:44I think by then Noel had realised that we needed to kind of make ourselves some sort of charity
53:52or organisation to help support people
53:54so then people say
53:57well look at all the good that he did
53:59you can't weigh it up like that
54:04a lot of good does not outweigh a whole load of bad
54:07you can't weigh it up like that
54:37your strength and your grace and your healing power
54:51my best friend
55:00she had a really hard time
55:02at this new community house
55:03battle centre
55:04she was very unhappy
55:08I remember her saying how depressed she was
55:12how she hated her life
55:14how difficult it was
55:16I used to go visit sometimes
55:20this elder
55:24he didn't seem to mind that I was there
55:27he would use me as a lookout
55:31so that I could warn him
55:33so that I could warn him if anybody in the community house
55:35was coming into the room or passing by
55:37he
55:40took her down into the cellar
55:42and he would touch her
55:44try and hug her
55:46and
55:46I mean
55:48I didn't actually try and watch
55:49because I was supposed to be the lookout
55:51but
55:51you can't help yourself but watch
55:54we were 12 and 13
55:57at the time
55:59one day my dad approached me
56:06and told me that
56:08my best friend had tried to commit suicide
56:12I felt ashamed
56:17I felt ashamed of what he'd done to her
56:21I felt ashamed that I hadn't told anybody already
56:23so the next day my dad arranged for me to
56:29tell the elder of our household
56:31they would report back to Noel
56:36Noel was just adamant I was a traitor
56:42and I was in collaboration with my best friend
56:46the dark voices
56:51what have they said
56:55what damage have they done
56:59what lies have they told
57:03what gossip has come from them
57:06the brothers
57:23they still didn't believe me
57:25men
57:26come and stand right at the front of the stage
57:28and just stand there and pray against me
57:30and curse me
57:31I was an abomination
57:34basically
57:35now part of this Jesus revolution
57:45is showing everyone that
57:46the Christian faith
57:48the living Christian faith
57:49is a faith of real joy
57:52you simply have to surrender
57:56and receive
57:58well of course
58:01she was not the only one
58:03what happened next
58:05was horrifying
58:06I later found out
58:09actually
58:10most of my peers
58:11had been abused
58:12these people
58:16they thought they were above the law
58:18and we
58:32said that
58:34all
58:35though
58:35about you
58:36they
58:37thought they were above them
58:37they found out
58:38they found out
58:38they loved by saying
58:39they informed them
58:40and they heard
58:40that thing
58:41they cannot
58:41they saw
58:41they found out
58:43they could
58:43they would
58:46You
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