- 2 days ago
Grieving and lost, a chef opens a small country restaurant, hoping to find healing, success, and maybe a second chance at love through his food.Grieving and lost, a chef opens a small country restaurant, hoping to find healing, success, and maybe a second chance at love through his food.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00You
00:00:30Let's get started.
00:01:00I am a cook, not a model.
00:01:27I don't want a five-page spread in hello.
00:01:31It's not about schmoozing with celebrities.
00:01:34It's about cooking real food with real heart.
00:01:39It seems like I just want...
00:01:57No!
00:01:58No!
00:01:59Mate, come on, just one photograph.
00:02:00No!
00:02:01No!
00:02:02Hang on.
00:02:03Yes, darling.
00:02:04So?
00:02:05It needs work, but it's perfect.
00:02:07Well, when can I see it?
00:02:09Michelle will love it.
00:02:11I made an offer.
00:02:12Oh, hang on, hang on, hang on.
00:02:14Are you driving?
00:02:15Very slowly.
00:02:16Well, then pull over and call me back.
00:02:21If you are trying to talk me into this...
00:02:23I wouldn't dream of it.
00:02:24But he says he's not leaving as he gets a photo with a genius who cooks this.
00:02:27He's a genius?
00:02:28Definitely.
00:02:29Okay.
00:02:30Ingo?
00:02:31Take the pass.
00:02:32Your shift.
00:02:33Work it, baby.
00:02:34Work it, baby.
00:02:55A real pleasure.
00:03:00The curse of being a celebrity.
00:03:01I never turn mine on.
00:03:02Good advice.
00:03:03Don't run, you'll have an accident.
00:03:15Hi, this is Francoise.
00:03:16I'm sorry I'm not here to take your call, but if you leave me a message, I will call you back.
00:03:22Bye.
00:03:24Hey, darling, it's me.
00:03:26I just wanted to hear the sound of your voice and to tell you that I love you.
00:03:31And that I miss you.
00:03:32And that I miss you.
00:03:33Ah.
00:03:34You're looking at photos again.
00:03:35You're looking at photos again.
00:03:36You're looking at photos again.
00:03:37You're looking at photos again.
00:03:38You're looking at photos again.
00:03:39You're looking at photos again.
00:03:40You're looking at photos again.
00:03:41You're looking at photos again.
00:03:42You're looking at photos again.
00:03:44You're looking at photos again.
00:03:45You're looking at photos again.
00:03:46You're looking at photos again.
00:03:47You're looking at photos again.
00:03:48You're looking at photos again.
00:03:49I can't remember what she looked like.
00:03:50Was that bad?
00:03:51You're looking at photos again?
00:04:12I can't remember what she looked like. Is that bad?
00:04:16No, sweetheart. It's normal.
00:04:21Come on, you. Right, sir.
00:04:25And by the way, I found this.
00:04:30What's the boot?
00:04:35It's nothing.
00:04:38Night-night.
00:04:51Today's reviews?
00:05:00Jesus.
00:05:01I thought it was pretty good, actually.
00:05:03Some muscular cooking.
00:05:05Quite s***.
00:05:06No. The one below it.
00:05:08It's just some grotty old pub.
00:05:10Rob Halen's place.
00:05:12Had the heart and the head for it.
00:05:14Three years ago.
00:05:15He was up there.
00:05:16Christ.
00:05:17What happened?
00:05:18His wife died.
00:05:23And now, here on Channel 4, Guy Witherspoon takes us to Eden.
00:05:32As we slide into the season of mist, mellow fruitfulness, welcome to Food for Thought with me, your host, Guy Witherspoon.
00:05:44I'd never been to Wiltshire before. I'd heard there was nowhere to eat. Nowhere decent. Anyway. Nowhere...
00:06:13Until Jack and Jill Adams opened the inn.
00:06:19Jack conjures his marvels in the kitchen while Jill adorns the front of house with greater land.
00:06:27Shall we go in?
00:06:29All the menus are seasonal.
00:06:31So the quality and the freshness is second to none.
00:06:36It was very droll, little Geoffrey Chambert. Thank you so much.
00:06:48Shall I give you some?
00:06:50Lovely.
00:06:52A pub with real English food and guys doing a show on it. That's new.
00:07:05Do you know this bloke?
00:07:07Vaguely. He's very good, but he's a big drinker.
00:07:13Nothing could be further removed from the radioactive slurry that pours out of microwaves and pubs all over the land.
00:07:22I was watching that. What was the score?
00:07:34Here we have some adorable little...
00:07:36Those fish pies come in?
00:07:37Shallows?
00:07:38Yep.
00:07:39He certainly knows his onions.
00:07:40Concoction.
00:07:41Asperge.
00:07:42Poirot.
00:07:43A teeny bit of fatter cheese peeking out, I think, and...
00:07:47Oh, yes.
00:07:48Don't.
00:07:49My hostess, she's very authentic.
00:07:51She's absolutely copper-bottomed.
00:07:54Through and through, I'd say.
00:07:56Splendid creep.
00:07:59It's gourmet bloody everything these days.
00:08:02Even the boot's got things on sticks now.
00:08:04Kebabs?
00:08:05No.
00:08:06Corn dogs?
00:08:08No.
00:08:10Satay?
00:08:11That's the one.
00:08:18Oh, my God.
00:08:19What?
00:08:21Do you remember this?
00:08:23Oh, your Madonna phase.
00:08:26Yes, I do.
00:08:28A ten-year-old singing like a virgin is frightening.
00:08:31Especially if you're a father.
00:08:36It's good to have you own, Kate.
00:08:39We'll look after you.
00:08:41From Spain?
00:08:43If you want us to stay, we'll stay.
00:08:45We've had the reservation for months.
00:08:47Look, you could come with us.
00:08:49Review some restaurants.
00:08:51This is perfect.
00:08:52I'm gonna write my guide to chefs with talent and originality.
00:08:56Not celebrity and wannabe rock stars.
00:09:01No offense.
00:09:02Oh, yes.
00:09:03Very, very delicious.
00:09:04Rob?
00:09:05Concoction.
00:09:06Asperge.
00:09:07Well.
00:09:09Gordon.
00:09:10What are you doing here?
00:09:11Long time no see.
00:09:12Your empire is just amazing.
00:09:15Congratulations.
00:09:16What in the hell's going on?
00:09:18What are you talking about?
00:09:19Come on.
00:09:20What?
00:09:21Real food.
00:09:22With real heart.
00:09:23Does that ring any bells for you?
00:09:25Yeah, but I mean things change.
00:09:27Francoise would be horrified if she saw this.
00:09:29Don't bring her into this, please.
00:09:31Come on, you know she would.
00:09:33Still selling the trifle?
00:09:35Uh, not really, no.
00:09:36Another bloody critic who couldn't boil water, you know.
00:09:49I don't know, but by the look of things, that's really nailed it.
00:09:52This has got to stop.
00:09:53One a day.
00:09:54Okay.
00:09:55Have you got everything?
00:09:56I'm taking Michelle to school this morning.
00:09:57Can you pick her up this afternoon?
00:09:58Yeah, no problem.
00:09:59What are you up to?
00:10:00Are you thinking about buying mum's boot?
00:10:01Come on, you.
00:10:02We'll be late.
00:10:03We'll be late.
00:10:04Bye.
00:10:05Bye.
00:10:06Bye.
00:10:07Peace out, bye.
00:10:08It's time to sleep.
00:10:09Stay away.
00:10:10I'm taking Michelle to school.
00:10:11Can you pick her up this afternoon?
00:10:12Yeah, no problem.
00:10:13What are you up to?
00:10:14What are you thinking about buying mum's boot?
00:10:16Come on, you, we'll be late.
00:10:17A stupid old f**k.
00:10:47Bloody Charming.
00:11:17Hi, um, looking for John?
00:11:47It's a bit quiet.
00:11:49Yeah lad, busiest time of day.
00:11:52Aye, that it is.
00:11:58Ah.
00:11:59What the bloody hell do you want?
00:12:02Well, three years ago my wife, she made you an offer on this place.
00:12:08You're Rob Haley.
00:12:10You've got a bloody nerve showing your face around here.
00:12:13I picked out a lovely little retirement place in Alicante.
00:12:16What the hell happened?
00:12:18Things.
00:12:19Oh, that's all right then.
00:12:20If it's things, dinky dory.
00:12:23That explains bloody everything.
00:12:25That's peachy.
00:12:26The wife left me thanks to you.
00:12:28I'm sorry.
00:12:29No, really.
00:12:30I meant it.
00:12:31Best thing that ever happened.
00:12:33Is it still for sale?
00:12:36Well, I never.
00:12:39Hey, babe.
00:12:41Long time no see.
00:12:43Aren't you a sight for sore eyes?
00:12:45Hi.
00:12:46I'm Kate.
00:12:47Rob.
00:12:50Hi guys.
00:12:51He's going to buy the place.
00:12:54You can't sell this place.
00:12:57No, I'm thinking about it.
00:12:59He's a chef.
00:13:02What kind of food?
00:13:03Uh, British.
00:13:05Oh, like all day English breakfasts?
00:13:07Bangers, beans, fried bread.
00:13:09Love fried bread.
00:13:10Rob's a real chef.
00:13:12Oh, really?
00:13:14Well, I don't come here for the cuisine.
00:13:18This is perfect.
00:13:20Nothing pretentious.
00:13:21Oh, I don't do pretentious.
00:13:24I do real food with real heart.
00:13:29Kate knows a lot about food.
00:13:30She's a restaurant critic.
00:13:38You don't, um, like critics?
00:13:40No.
00:13:41Not a lot.
00:13:42Is that your car?
00:13:43Yeah.
00:13:44Yeah.
00:13:45Well, you'll kill somebody driving like that.
00:13:47And this?
00:13:48It's very unladylike.
00:13:49Oh, my God.
00:13:50That was you?
00:13:51Mm-hmm.
00:13:53Oh.
00:13:54Well, I sure hope you're better cooked than you are a driver.
00:13:58Hmm.
00:14:09Right, you.
00:14:12Get started.
00:14:13You've just cost me 400 grand.
00:14:16That's an awful lot of washing up.
00:14:18I'm so sorry.
00:14:19You should be.
00:14:21I can't tell you a couple days later.
00:14:22That's right, he looks a lot better than you are.
00:14:24You should beFXLograms.
00:14:25You should liveguard if you've got to.
00:14:26What's the best?
00:14:27You should be in the sea.
00:14:28No challenge.
00:14:29How do I go?
00:14:30Oh I don't know.
00:14:31My walk.
00:14:32I'm sorry.
00:14:33Oh, God.
00:14:34Whatever?
00:14:37One århades.
00:14:38Ah...
00:14:39That's just a big thing to find.
00:14:40My walk the road left.
00:14:41When I go is running long,
00:14:44You're a little.
00:14:45See a little.
00:14:46Think on the road?
00:14:47Okay...
00:14:50Darling, I'm so glad your father still knows how to throw a good party.
00:14:57I'm so glad that you still know where to find beautiful accessories.
00:15:01Oh, you haven't met?
00:15:03This is Roberto.
00:15:05Kate.
00:15:06Not a word in English.
00:15:08Mi amore, un altro bicchieri di champagne, per favore.
00:15:12Grazie.
00:15:15Can I be you when I grow up?
00:15:20Oh, darling girl.
00:15:22The first divorce is always the worst.
00:15:24It gets better after that.
00:15:26Believe me.
00:15:28Oh, I'm going to have to rescue him.
00:15:31The last thing we want is a Roman rage.
00:15:38Quail's eggs on a bed of shredded leeks with Scottish smoked salmon,
00:15:43lightly pickled cucumber and oat cakes.
00:15:47Don't remember ordering that.
00:15:48Where did you get it?
00:15:49I made it.
00:15:50Knocked me down with a feather.
00:15:52My dad used to be a chef.
00:15:54Yeah, my granny used to look good naked.
00:15:56Nice vessel, great.
00:15:57Just try it.
00:15:58Try it.
00:16:15Blimey, don't blame me.
00:16:16I'm after Totty, isn't I?
00:16:17Yeah, I could give her some, and that's for sure.
00:16:22Could you?
00:16:23You ain't got a chance?
00:16:24None whatsoever.
00:16:25Back in the day, Max, the two of us would have had her kit off in three seconds flat.
00:16:31If I so much as catch you glancing in my daughter's general direction again, I'll set my dog on you.
00:16:37I'm worried about her.
00:16:38It's a bit late now.
00:16:39She's all grown up.
00:16:40Could kill her husband of hers.
00:16:41Shagging your secretary.
00:16:42Pathetic.
00:16:43Well, you can talk.
00:16:44Well, at least my secretary was a woman.
00:16:47Got one.
00:16:48Thanks.
00:16:49Thanks.
00:17:17The single life suits you.
00:17:18You're glowing.
00:17:19Champagne.
00:17:20You know, you shouldn't write off all as men.
00:17:25And why would that be, James?
00:17:28Well, for one thing, we don't all turn out to be gay.
00:17:44She wants me.
00:17:45I can tell.
00:17:46And last, but not least, ta-da, Michelle's favourite.
00:18:02You'll have to share.
00:18:15It's a triumph.
00:18:16I totally bloody agree.
00:18:17Don't swear.
00:18:18You do.
00:18:19No, I don't.
00:18:20Last week when that man said his chicken pie was still frozen in the middle, you called
00:18:25him a fuck.
00:18:26Chefs, don't swear.
00:18:27Michelle.
00:18:28Well, what do you think?
00:18:32Should we give it a go?
00:18:34We're gonna need some help.
00:18:35Hello, mate.
00:18:36How are you doing?
00:18:37Can I get you?
00:18:38I thought you wanted to cook.
00:18:39It's better than what he's doing.
00:18:40He's holding up a new place.
00:18:41Oh, nice.
00:18:42Mate, I'm telling you, he's started to cook again.
00:18:43I'm telling you, he's starting to cook again.
00:18:44I'm telling you, he's starting to cook again.
00:18:45It's better than what he's doing.
00:18:46He's holding up a new place.
00:18:47Oh, nice.
00:18:48Mate, I'm telling you, he's starting to cook again.
00:18:51Coyne!
00:18:52How are you doing?
00:18:53I'm gonna get you.
00:18:54I thought you wanted to cook.
00:18:57It's better than what he's doing.
00:18:58Resulting up a new place.
00:19:00Oh, nice.
00:19:01Mate, I'm telling you, he's starting to cook again.
00:19:18Coyne!
00:19:19Come on.
00:19:33Come on.
00:19:37Right.
00:19:47Where are we off to?
00:19:48Francoise's old boot, apparently.
00:19:51Sounds great.
00:20:06Christ, what's she done here?
00:20:08Pays her bills and she said the kids are cute.
00:20:11Bloody hell.
00:20:13You going in?
00:20:14No, you. She likes you.
00:20:17Really?
00:20:18Definitely.
00:20:19Yes.
00:20:20She wants to speak to you.
00:20:21And, um, I'd leave your jacket here with me.
00:20:22Yes.
00:20:23Yes.
00:20:24Yes.
00:20:25Yes.
00:20:26Yes.
00:20:27Yes.
00:20:28Yes.
00:20:29Yes.
00:20:30Yes.
00:20:31Yes.
00:20:32Yes.
00:20:33Yes.
00:20:34Yes.
00:20:35Yes.
00:20:36Yes.
00:20:37Yes.
00:20:38Yes.
00:20:39Yes.
00:20:40Yes.
00:20:41Yes.
00:20:42Yes.
00:20:43Yes.
00:20:44Yes.
00:20:45Yes.
00:20:46Yes.
00:20:47Yes.
00:20:48Yes.
00:20:49Yes.
00:20:50Yes.
00:20:51Yes.
00:20:52Yes.
00:20:53Yes.
00:20:54Yes.
00:20:55yes.
00:20:56I thought you said these kids were cute.
00:21:05Yes.
00:21:06You must be bloody joking.
00:21:07Look at you.
00:21:08Look at you.
00:21:12Come on.
00:21:21Oh, Goration.
00:21:23Sorry. Bloody hell.
00:21:27Aren't you going to say anything?
00:21:28She was brought up in the kitchen.
00:21:31Your mum loved this place.
00:21:33Hey, Cheryl, have you seen that?
00:21:38Oh, hello. It's the critic.
00:21:45So, you really did it, huh?
00:21:47We're turning it into a diner. Cheeseburgers, fries, shakes, just for you.
00:21:51And I thought it was going to be British cuisine with a Provence alt-twist and Tuscan overtones.
00:21:56And a dash of Northern Thai and a hint of Sichuan heat and everything on a stick.
00:21:59Gotta have those sticks.
00:22:00Sorry. No Provence alt-twist, no Tuscan overtones, no Catalonian subtext, no Cantonese top notes, no...
00:22:07Danish elements?
00:22:08Danish elements?
00:22:09No. No Danish elements. And no... Californian?
00:22:14Absolutely not.
00:22:15No Californian influence whatsoever.
00:22:17We're going to be serving the finest English ingredients treated with respect that's underpinned by classical French techniques.
00:22:25Aren't we?
00:22:27Well, are you?
00:22:28What'd she say?
00:22:29Well, there you are, then.
00:22:30Then I'm impressed.
00:22:31She's the boss.
00:22:33Don't ever work with your daughter.
00:22:35Good-bye.
00:22:36Happy birthday, Doctor.
00:22:54Perfect.
00:22:59Here you go.
00:23:00Here you go.
00:23:30There was a chef at the boot today.
00:23:37Excellent news.
00:23:38It'd be a disaster.
00:23:40Horns of people, the village choked with cars.
00:23:43Nothing like your parties then, Max.
00:23:45That's different. Anyway, the last one was for Kate.
00:23:48It was. We had 23 complaints at the council.
00:23:52Oh, a new record.
00:23:55It'd be nice to have somewhere local to go to.
00:23:57Then perhaps I wouldn't have to do so much cooking.
00:24:00You do make a good piece of toast.
00:24:01Well, it's more than you do.
00:24:05I was at his place in London a couple of weeks ago.
00:24:08I don't think the crowds are going to be the problem.
00:24:22Are you staring at my again?
00:24:23No.
00:24:24Nice shape, is it?
00:24:26I think it's firm enough for you.
00:24:28I'm going to give it a quick squeeze, see if it's ripe.
00:24:33Do you want a cup of tea?
00:24:37With one sugar?
00:24:38I'll have one too.
00:24:44We'll miss the flight.
00:24:45I'm only going to say hello.
00:24:47You can do that when we get back.
00:24:49Oh.
00:24:50Might be too late by then.
00:24:54Let's remove this lovely piece of vintage equipment, shall we?
00:24:57It's very precious.
00:24:58Bloody hell.
00:25:14Idiot!
00:25:16I'm really sorry. Are you okay?
00:25:17Bloody nearly killed me.
00:25:18Yeah, I'm sorry.
00:25:19We did a little bit of reorganizing.
00:25:20Are you sure you're okay?
00:25:21I'm Rob.
00:25:22Max Templeton.
00:25:23I live just around the corner.
00:25:25Can I get you a drink?
00:25:26A cup of tea?
00:25:27No, thanks.
00:25:28Kate's told me all about your plans.
00:25:29Kate?
00:25:30My daughter.
00:25:31The American.
00:25:32The 60s, rock and roll.
00:25:33The states, a long and brutal story.
00:25:34Look, we all value the peace and quiet around here.
00:25:37I hope you're not going to spoil it.
00:25:38Karaoke only will be twice a week.
00:25:39And abandoned on Friday and Saturday.
00:25:40What?
00:25:41I'm kidding.
00:25:42It's just a small pub with great food, and that's it.
00:25:45If you ruin it, I'll disembowel you.
00:25:48With a drink.
00:25:49Can I get you a drink?
00:25:50Can I get you a drink?
00:25:51Can I get you a drink?
00:25:52A cup of tea?
00:25:53No, thanks.
00:25:54Kate's told me all about your plans.
00:25:55Kate?
00:25:56My daughter.
00:25:57The American.
00:25:58The American.
00:25:59With a church spire.
00:26:09Do you think I got a chance with Shauna?
00:26:10I don't know.
00:26:11It's all about luck and timing, isn't it?
00:26:13What should I do?
00:26:14Well, try asking her for a start.
00:26:20Did you send for the cavalry?
00:26:29Rob Haley?
00:26:30No, he's inside.
00:26:32Won't be a minute.
00:26:42Can I help you?
00:26:43Rob Haley?
00:26:44Yeah?
00:26:45James Forrester.
00:26:46I own a bit of the land around here.
00:26:48Um.
00:26:49Sorry.
00:26:50So, uh.
00:26:51Gastronomic oasis, eh?
00:26:52Good old English grub, Kate tells me.
00:26:53Is she a friend of yours?
00:26:54Bit more than that if you catch my drift, don't you?
00:26:55So, lamb with lashings of mint sauce and red currant jelly.
00:26:58Is that the sort of thing?
00:26:59Can you pass the scrapper, please?
00:27:00Spotted .
00:27:01And the, uh, screws.
00:27:05keeping the creepy crawlies out, eh?
00:27:07That's the idea.
00:27:08Don't want the health and safety Gestapo after you.
00:27:10I'm expecting great things.
00:27:11Well, I hope I don't disappoint me.
00:27:12You won't.
00:27:13Good day.
00:27:22I'm expecting great things.
00:27:23Well, I hope I don't disappoint you.
00:27:25You won't.
00:27:26Good day.
00:27:27Thank you, Overy.
00:27:28Hello.
00:27:31Come on.
00:27:32Come on.
00:27:33Good day.
00:28:03Just a little reminder.
00:28:18That's it. That's it.
00:28:24Almost.
00:28:26Come on.
00:28:33Oh, well, that's pretty unequivocal.
00:28:36Yeah.
00:28:39Well, what do you think?
00:28:42You know, a trifle? Yeah, what about the trifle?
00:28:45Absolutely, I'll have a trifle.
00:28:48Ta-da!
00:28:50Shell?
00:28:51Do the honours.
00:28:53I now declare the boot open!
00:28:56Woo!
00:28:57Woo!
00:28:58Woo!
00:28:59Woo!
00:29:02A few customers.
00:29:03Word of mouth.
00:29:04We're off.
00:29:27Afternoon.
00:29:30Did you see the sign?
00:29:32What sign?
00:29:37Loz, get the pent.
00:29:40And the stepladder.
00:29:47At least someone's happy.
00:29:50I'll be jiggered.
00:29:53It's all right, I'll take a break.
00:29:55Bloody career waiting for these two to make up their minds.
00:30:00Now then, gents.
00:30:02What'll it be?
00:30:13Plowman's lunch?
00:30:15Plowman's lunch?
00:30:17If they think they can order off menu...
00:30:18Where are you going?
00:30:19Whoa, whoa, no, no, don't, man.
00:30:20Come on.
00:30:21They're only customers.
00:30:23Come on.
00:30:28All right.
00:30:29Mm.
00:30:31Mm.
00:30:32Mm.
00:30:33Mm.
00:30:35Mm.
00:30:37Mm.
00:30:39Mm.
00:30:41Naive, domesticated little bold dough.
00:30:44Oh, the presumptuous air.
00:30:47Raspberry notes.
00:30:49Medium tannin and a...
00:30:51Oh, there's...
00:30:52Oh, shit.
00:30:54Is that any way to address an artist at work?
00:30:57Come, stay a while.
00:30:58Some of these are almost palatable.
00:31:00We're filming today, remember?
00:31:01No.
00:31:02I'll dazzle them.
00:31:03They'll cancel it, you know.
00:31:04They will not cancel it.
00:31:05I'm a national sensation.
00:31:08Anyway, I'm as sober as judge.
00:31:10Come on.
00:31:11Coffee time.
00:31:12I don't want coffee.
00:31:13Put it down.
00:31:14Put it down.
00:31:15But why?
00:31:16We're going to get some coffee.
00:31:18Come on, you naughty man.
00:31:19Come on.
00:31:20Bitch.
00:31:23Miserable old .
00:31:24And after all that, it was a cheese roll with p...
00:31:27Pickles.
00:31:29All right.
00:31:31Save my sorry soul.
00:31:49What's this?
00:31:50Trifle.
00:31:51Try some.
00:31:52Don't like trifle.
00:31:53Go on.
00:31:54Just a taste.
00:31:55Don't want to.
00:32:21What are you doing, babe?
00:32:22You're taking Flo out to play.
00:32:23Is that all right?
00:32:24Aye.
00:32:25I am.
00:32:26I am.
00:32:27I am.
00:32:28I am.
00:32:29I am.
00:32:30I am.
00:32:31I am.
00:32:32I am.
00:32:33I am.
00:32:34I am.
00:32:35I am.
00:32:36I am.
00:32:37I am.
00:32:38I am.
00:32:39I am.
00:32:40I am.
00:32:41I am.
00:32:42I am.
00:32:43I am.
00:32:44I am.
00:32:45I am.
00:32:46I am.
00:32:47I am.
00:32:48I am.
00:32:49I am.
00:32:50I am.
00:32:51I am.
00:32:52I am.
00:32:53I am.
00:32:54I am.
00:32:55I am.
00:32:56I am.
00:32:57I am.
00:32:58I am.
00:32:59I am.
00:33:00I am.
00:33:01I am.
00:33:02I am.
00:33:03I am.
00:33:04I am.
00:33:05I am.
00:33:06I am.
00:33:07I am.
00:33:08And I am.
00:33:09I am.
00:33:10And I am.
00:33:12And I may just be another dumb American to you, but I
00:33:17am not that stupid.
00:33:36Right. Well, let's get one thing straight.
00:33:40You're off the clock.
00:33:45Let me show you to your table.
00:33:51Calf's tongue with celeriac rimland.
00:33:56Sounds delicious.
00:34:06I like it.
00:34:15What next?
00:34:17She's American, so anything with its head still attached.
00:34:22Leave it to me.
00:34:24Madam.
00:34:27Well, hello there.
00:34:31Think you'll pick up?
00:34:33Well, the food might have been crap in London, but at least they were buying lots of it.
00:34:42Oh, no. Really, I couldn't. Thank you.
00:34:45Pudding. You'll like it.
00:34:50Okay. One bite.
00:35:03Oh, my God.
00:35:07Told you.
00:35:10Mmm. Mmm.
00:35:14That soul is great. Perfect. And that calf's tongue? A revelation.
00:35:20Thanks.
00:35:21And, wow, that is no ordinary trifle.
00:35:26I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but that is some seriously s*** pudding.
00:35:30Okay.
00:35:31So why aren't they lined up around the block?
00:35:33We've just opened.
00:35:35You have heard of publicity.
00:35:38Oh, are you just gonna do that British thing where you hide your light under a bushel and then complain when no one sees it?
00:35:45She knows the secret plan.
00:35:47You may want to rethink that strategy, particularly your critic issues.
00:35:52Come on.
00:35:54How much do I owe you?
00:35:57It's on the house.
00:36:07Shall I get the paint pot?
00:36:08What?
00:36:09No chance.
00:36:38Not yet.
00:37:00Still haven't converted to the joys of Laperler, I see.
00:37:03Still haven't gotten over your nick a fetish, I see.
00:37:07It's not a fetish. It's more of an appreciation.
00:37:10He seems like a nice enough chap for an artisan.
00:37:14Who's that?
00:37:15That fellow at the boot.
00:37:17Oh, Rob. Yeah, he's great. Really great.
00:37:22I, uh, read your review of his place in London.
00:37:28I'm sure he'll make a c*** this one, too, in due course.
00:37:32Well, everybody deserves a second chance.
00:37:34Of course they do.
00:37:40Oh, James, please.
00:37:42Kate, we were bloody good together.
00:37:46Oh, come on!
00:37:50Look what you've done.
00:37:52These trousers are dry, clean only.
00:37:55Then send me the bill.
00:38:01What can I get you?
00:38:02Oh, where's Michelle?
00:38:04Oh, I'm gonna go take her to feed the ducks.
00:38:08How's it looking?
00:38:09The yacht may have to wait.
00:38:10That's all right. I guess they're sick.
00:38:13How long have we got?
00:38:14Another month.
00:38:15Any more customers?
00:38:28Nope.
00:38:29That's a shame.
00:38:30Yeah, well, nothing we can do about it, is there.
00:38:32No, of course not.
00:38:34There's nothing that you can do.
00:38:35I mean, there's nothing anyone can do.
00:38:37Certainly nothing that I can do, because...
00:38:39I made a promise that no one else will ever know.
00:38:44Know about what?
00:38:45Dad's cooking.
00:38:47Don't you want people to know?
00:38:49I just don't want to be judged up by some puffed-up, know-nothing critic.
00:38:52Present company accepted.
00:38:54But don't critics get you noticed?
00:38:57Yeah, Dad.
00:38:59Don't critics get you noticed?
00:39:01Are you two gangin' up on me?
00:39:02Oh, hello?
00:39:16Hello?
00:39:19Uh...
00:39:20Four.
00:39:23That's...
00:39:24That's...
00:39:24Hang on.
00:39:31What are they?
00:39:32Do you know what the bloody time is?
00:40:01We're fully booked.
00:40:01No!
00:40:02Hello?
00:40:07The boot?
00:40:09Six for dinner at eight?
00:40:13Sunday?
00:40:14Lunch or dinner?
00:40:15Um...
00:40:16No, I'm sorry.
00:40:19Next week?
00:40:21I'm...
00:40:21I'm sorry.
00:40:24Okay.
00:40:25Bye.
00:40:26Bye.
00:40:26Bloody hell.
00:40:32What happened?
00:40:33We got a review.
00:40:47Stop!
00:40:47Don't run and don't ever, ever catch anything.
00:40:50If it falls, let it.
00:40:51It could be sharp, it could be hot, it could be both.
00:40:53I don't want you injured.
00:40:54I need you.
00:40:55Yes, Chef.
00:40:55What the bloody hell is going on?
00:41:06Bloody tourists.
00:41:08They ruin everything.
00:41:10Oh, do stop.
00:41:14Hey.
00:41:14Hey.
00:41:15This hasn't got anything to do with you, has it?
00:41:17Definitely not.
00:41:18Do you want to give a hand?
00:41:20Oh, no.
00:41:21You don't want my help in your kitchen.
00:41:22I use a smoke alarm as a timer.
00:41:24Ha ha.
00:41:24Bloody critics.
00:41:25I know.
00:41:26Can't even boil water.
00:41:28I keep that to remind me.
00:41:30Of how hard you have to work to maintain standards?
00:41:32No, what I'm going to do to the little b**** when I find them.
00:41:36If there's any truth to it at all, I think they did you a favor.
00:41:43Where's Michelle?
00:41:44She's, uh, upstairs.
00:41:48One, Kate.
00:41:50Thanks.
00:41:51What for?
00:41:55Engel, vegetables.
00:41:56Now.
00:42:05Michelle?
00:42:21Kate?
00:42:23Oh, hey.
00:42:24Um.
00:42:25Pa, you ready to go check out the ducks?
00:42:36Oh, here.
00:42:38Where are you going?
00:42:39To give that jumped-up little twat a piece of my mind.
00:42:45What the bloody hell's going on?
00:42:46You look well.
00:42:47You had a good time.
00:42:48I wouldn't stand there if I were you.
00:42:49Listen, we're booked solid, but we can always squeeze you in.
00:42:52My fellow's a beat.
00:42:53You've ruined it.
00:42:55What?
00:42:57It's taken me two hours to get here.
00:42:59Two hours.
00:42:59It normally takes me 40 minutes.
00:43:01The whole place is choked with cars.
00:43:03It's a disaster.
00:43:04Are you looking for trouble?
00:43:06No.
00:43:06But if you could just move a bit.
00:43:07I'm not moving anywhere.
00:43:09You're the ones who are going to move.
00:43:11You're going to move.
00:43:23Half a minute if you please shouted the man over his shoulder
00:43:29and vanished into a babble of voices and a cloud of smoke.
00:43:35You fancy me, right?
00:43:44Anyway?
00:43:45Night-night. Sleep tight.
00:43:48Mind the bad books, don't buy it.
00:43:59He loves me.
00:44:22Oh, I said, and all you did to me.
00:44:29Was a stone that flies beneath a dark blue sea.
00:44:34Hi.
00:44:35Hi.
00:44:39I owe you one.
00:44:40Oh, no, it was nothing, Alyssa. I was happy to do it.
00:44:54I'm sorry.
00:44:57God.
00:44:59What happened to her?
00:45:06She was a very fast driver.
00:45:09Oh.
00:45:16I'd better get going.
00:45:18Yeah, me too. I'm off to bed.
00:45:20And, Kate, thank you.
00:45:29Anytime.
00:45:32Okay.
00:45:34Good night.
00:45:35Night.
00:45:35Good night.
00:45:49Good night.
00:45:49Good night.
00:45:50Good night.
00:45:51Good night.
00:45:51Good night.
00:45:53Good night.
00:45:53Good night.
00:45:54Good night.
00:45:54Good night.
00:45:55Good night.
00:45:55Good night.
00:45:56Good night.
00:45:56Good night.
00:45:57Good night.
00:45:57Good night.
00:45:58Good night.
00:45:58Good night.
00:45:59Good night.
00:45:59Good night.
00:46:00Good night.
00:46:00Good night.
00:46:01Good night.
00:46:01Good night.
00:46:02Good night.
00:46:02Good night.
00:46:03Good night.
00:46:03Good night.
00:46:03Good night.
00:46:04Good night.
00:46:04This was a good idea.
00:46:34This was a good idea.
00:47:04Perfect. Off you go.
00:47:23My dad showed me he left me by having his secretary sign my birthday cards.
00:47:28She's a lucky girl.
00:47:30She hasn't got a mom, has she?
00:47:31No, she's got a great dad. It's more than most.
00:47:34Yeah, you'll lose something like that.
00:47:37Let me show you how to hold a knife.
00:47:40You, um, you keep your finger on the blade.
00:47:44Short strokes.
00:47:45Keep your eye on it and keep your thumb out of the way.
00:47:47Keep the point of the knife on the board and let your knuckles guide the blade.
00:47:50There you go.
00:48:00It's a more even slice and a nice chance of your fingers ending up in the dish.
00:48:03Because you've got such beautiful hands.
00:48:06You don't want them to end up like this.
00:48:13Safety's a big thing for you.
00:48:15Well, you know, kitchens are a dangerous place.
00:48:17And not just kitchens.
00:48:18So, what happened to, um, to your ex?
00:48:24Jack?
00:48:25Mm-hmm.
00:48:26Um, tall, handsome, well-educated, good family, great job, gay, and...
00:48:35Exactly.
00:48:37And, um, okay, um, what's his face?
00:48:42Oh, James?
00:48:43Mm-hmm.
00:48:44How can I put it?
00:48:45A, uh, youthful indiscretion?
00:48:49Momentary lapse.
00:48:50Drunk?
00:48:51Oh, paradise lost.
00:49:02Don't be silly.
00:49:03It's just a few extra cars.
00:49:06He's a great guy, an amazing cook, and what he does brings pleasure to a lot of people.
00:49:12At my expense.
00:49:14It's always about you, isn't it?
00:49:16I don't know what you mean.
00:49:16It's always when you want it and how you want it to look.
00:49:22Rubbish.
00:49:25Before it was rock and roll and a single life, and now it's tranquility and being my father.
00:49:34Well, you didn't make it easy.
00:49:36You took your mother's side.
00:49:41Are you serious?
00:49:44I was 12 years old.
00:49:45How was your screwing around my fault?
00:49:48You left.
00:49:51I didn't mean to hurt anyone.
00:49:54But you did.
00:49:57Kate, I'm...
00:49:59I'm sorry.
00:50:01I'm really...
00:50:03Really sorry.
00:50:05And, uh...
00:50:06I want to make it up to you.
00:50:10I know.
00:50:10I know.
00:50:15I'm going to walk back.
00:50:21Yeah.
00:50:21I know.
00:50:21I know.
00:50:22I know.
00:50:22I know.
00:50:24I know.
00:50:25Why aren't they really waiting for my arrival?
00:50:43Am I expected to commune with my muse in these intolerable circumstances?
00:50:48Keep your hair on. They won't be long.
00:50:50Why don't you toddle along and find out exactly how long?
00:50:53What's this?
00:50:54The boot in Wootten-Dusset has just opened.
00:50:57We thought it might be a possibility to fill the gap we have on the 17th.
00:51:01Well, let's see if it's still there in ten years' time.
00:51:03It's Rob Haley's new place.
00:51:05Oh, Rob. Poor Rob. It's too sad. It really is.
00:51:10It's totally lost it. What a shame.
00:51:13What on God's green earth are those nincompoops up to?
00:51:19Do be a dear and go and find out, will you?
00:51:22Oh, my God.
00:51:23Oh, my God.
00:51:24Oh, my God.
00:51:26Oh, my God.
00:51:27Oh, my God.
00:51:28Oh, my God.
00:51:29Your Bloody Mary, with a splash of sherry, as ordered.
00:51:33Derek, you are a god.
00:51:36I thought Nanny would never go.
00:51:44This new place. Where is Wootten-Dusset?
00:51:49About 20 minutes away.
00:51:51Time for a little expedition.
00:51:52You can get me into serious trouble.
00:51:56You're used to it by now, Derek.
00:51:59Anyway, it's research for the 17th.
00:52:03You heard what Little Miss Muffet said.
00:52:04Uh, boss.
00:52:11I think we might have a bit of a problem.
00:52:16Derek.
00:52:17Are you in trouble again?
00:52:19Sean, what is he doing here?
00:52:32Who?
00:52:33A guy with a spoon.
00:52:35S***.
00:52:37Do you want to get rid of him?
00:52:38What's the line?
00:52:39You know how many people watch his show.
00:52:40Well, we'll freak if he sees him.
00:52:42Okay.
00:52:42You can go. How long for my soul?
00:52:44Two minutes, mate.
00:52:45Tell me there isn't a problem.
00:52:51No problem.
00:52:52No problem at all.
00:52:53Why would there be a problem?
00:52:54I'm going in.
00:52:54The sous chef's really shy.
00:52:56Yeah, I don't care.
00:52:56Dipped his face in the chip pan.
00:52:58Never mind.
00:52:58Horrible burns.
00:52:59Anything else?
00:53:00Buggy crisps?
00:53:01Yeah, I'll go.
00:53:02No, no, no.
00:53:04What's going on?
00:53:05Nothing.
00:53:06I wasn't asking you.
00:53:08What the hell's going on?
00:53:09Look, mate, no. Come on.
00:53:10You don't want to see it.
00:53:11You really don't want to see it.
00:53:13What if I...
00:53:14Rob?
00:53:14They said you weren't here.
00:53:17Guy?
00:53:20Dear boy.
00:53:26You know, he's the only critic worth a hill of haricots.
00:53:29You've got time for a little catlet.
00:53:31Oh, a quick one.
00:53:33Armagnac?
00:53:34You remembered. I'm touched.
00:53:35Lafitte de Boignier?
00:53:37I think we have some.
00:53:38Then twist my rubber arm.
00:53:39Right.
00:53:46Love your tie.
00:53:48Thank you, love.
00:53:51Darling boy, this program immortalizes us.
00:53:54It can immortalize this lovely place of yours.
00:53:57See, I'm not interested in immortality guy.
00:54:02I just want to feed people.
00:54:04What about the team?
00:54:05It might be quite pleasant for them.
00:54:06Might it not?
00:54:07I did not tickle them.
00:54:10Think it over.
00:54:11I'm not badger you.
00:54:12Call me if you change your mind.
00:54:16If and only if you think it might be fun.
00:54:21Hmm.
00:54:24You off?
00:54:26You can't leave that lovely stuff trapped in there.
00:54:30It's cruel.
00:54:30Hmm.
00:55:00What are you doing out here?
00:55:08Trying to think of something to say.
00:55:10How long is that going to take you?
00:55:12Um.
00:55:14You are bloody useless.
00:55:17Is this all I get off the months of waiting?
00:55:23Get inside, you lovely big burk.
00:55:27What do you mean, months of waiting?
00:55:28Mel.
00:55:29Cocosnaps.
00:55:35Or porridge.
00:55:38I know what you mean.
00:55:42Morning.
00:55:44Sleep well, did you?
00:55:45Like a baby.
00:55:49I, um, I don't suppose you want to be on TV, do you?
00:55:54What?
00:55:55He wants to do food for thought from him.
00:55:59Seriously.
00:56:04So that's a no then.
00:56:09What's going on?
00:56:11I'm playing some stupid game.
00:56:13I am going to be a TV star.
00:56:16Food for thought?
00:56:17Oh, yes.
00:56:18Oh, no.
00:56:20You're in my car.
00:56:22Come on.
00:56:23Shall I do the tea then?
00:56:28Shall I do the tea then?
00:56:30So we start outside.
00:56:32We'll get guides through the introduction.
00:56:33That's right.
00:56:33I'm sorry.
00:56:34I'm sorry.
00:56:36Just, just, just, just look at him.
00:56:39It's your aftershave.
00:56:41It's damaged my olfactory receptors.
00:56:45Now I can't wait for them any longer.
00:56:47You need me.
00:56:50Let's all stay calm, shall we?
00:56:56Now we shoot on a 17th.
00:56:59I promise that Guy will be there sober and on time.
00:57:02Now, now, Tanya.
00:57:03What have I told you about making promises?
00:57:07Terry!
00:57:07Terry!
00:57:12Terry here.
00:57:13We'll be making sure that nothing untoward occurs.
00:57:17Won't you, Terry?
00:57:20Mr. Witherspoon will be at the appointed place,
00:57:23at the appointed time, ready to go.
00:57:25As clean as a whistle, as pure as the driven.
00:57:28Not a drop of alcohol will pass his lips until then.
00:57:33You can't do that.
00:57:35Really?
00:57:36Watch me.
00:57:44Are we expecting anyone?
00:57:47Flash, b****ster.
00:57:58He's landing on my bloody Krab K-Law.
00:58:01Sorry to ruin your little game.
00:58:29I think the pilot got a bit lost.
00:58:32Oh, you could have fooled me, son.
00:58:34You don't know where Rob Haley's boot is, do you?
00:58:37What?
00:58:38It's that way.
00:58:39At the end of the drive.
00:58:41Okay, nice one.
00:58:42Cheers.
00:58:45Right, that's it.
00:58:46Game over.
00:58:47Not till you hit the post.
00:58:49I think the croquetto went very well with the skate.
00:59:01The Puy Puy, say, might have been a better choice.
00:59:04But you've got to love the way it does the butter.
00:59:07Blackened to perfection.
00:59:08And exactly the right amount of capers.
00:59:11Who would have thought you could do that with a carrot?
00:59:15I can definitely help.
00:59:19You're forgetting about my military training.
00:59:21I thought you were kicked out of the territorials
00:59:24because all you ever did was go to the dinners.
00:59:26I wasn't kicked out.
00:59:27I was asked to leave.
00:59:29Huh?
00:59:30And what's the plan?
00:59:31Don't move.
00:59:33I'll be back in a minute.
00:59:42Operation Rat-A-Tooie.
00:59:46Huh.
00:59:50What? What's wrong with her?
00:59:51It's not what they ordered.
00:59:52Dude, it's getting nasty out there.
00:59:54It's not much better in here.
00:59:55Tell them it's all we've got.
00:59:56Tell them it's on the house.
00:59:57The steak's gone, the halibut's finished,
00:59:59and there's no more syllabus.
01:00:00Well, I mean, you're like it.
01:00:01Out!
01:00:02What?
01:00:03What did you do?
01:00:04What did you do?
01:00:05No, it's okay. It's okay.
01:00:06Did you ever find your knickers, my darling?
01:00:26Oh, I really wanted that one.
01:00:28Then you shall have it.
01:00:32I know the owner.
01:00:35Um, I wouldn't go in there, mate.
01:00:40Is that so?
01:00:42What the bloody hell is going on?
01:00:53Oh, excuse me.
01:00:54Listen here, moon face.
01:00:55I'm an expert at martial arts.
01:00:57Well, I'm in a blind panic.
01:01:05Right.
01:01:06You're coming with me.
01:01:07You didn't just snap your fingers at me.
01:01:09I did.
01:01:11You know,
01:01:12kitchen's a very dangerous place, James.
01:01:16Anything could happen.
01:01:18Leave now.
01:01:19You haven't heard the last of this.
01:01:29Mike Tango,
01:01:31this is Juliet Foxtrot.
01:01:33No, Max, it's James.
01:01:35Operation Moussaka is a go.
01:01:36I repeat, Operation Moussaka is a go.
01:01:39Ah, bless you.
01:01:43Cheers.
01:01:43Cheers.
01:01:49So?
01:01:50What?
01:01:52So what are you going to do about Kate?
01:01:54Do?
01:01:55Well, she fancies you.
01:01:56You fancy her.
01:01:57Well, hello there, Oprah.
01:01:58Didn't recognize you there for a moment.
01:02:00I'm trying to do you a favor.
01:02:01Great.
01:02:02We'll look after Michelle for me, will you?
01:02:04I'm popping out for a bit.
01:02:06You what?
01:02:07Uh-huh.
01:02:08Yeah.
01:02:12Oh!
01:02:16I don't need that with a feather, man.
01:02:19I don't need that with a feather, but I'm still his little girl, so shh.
01:02:37Okay.
01:02:37Okay.
01:02:49I have to tell you, um, it's been a while.
01:03:11Me too.
01:03:11Boot.
01:03:25I'll give him the boot.
01:03:29You sure you're okay?
01:03:31Yes.
01:03:32She comes first, and she should.
01:03:36Okay.
01:03:37I'm so happy.
01:03:43No.
01:03:43I'm so happy.
01:04:05I don't know.
01:04:35I think there's someone outside.
01:04:40It's rather just a fox or something, sweetheart.
01:04:43Go back to bed.
01:05:01Mr. Hayley? Mr. Robert Hayley?
01:05:03Yeah. Health and safety.
01:05:05Feel somewhere I can get changed?
01:05:09What's this about?
01:05:11There's been a complaint.
01:05:13What sort of complaint?
01:05:15I couldn't possibly say.
01:05:19Who was it?
01:05:21You should know better than that, sir.
01:05:25Do you want some coffee?
01:05:31Oh, dear.
01:05:33Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.
01:05:37That is disgusting.
01:05:41I'm giving you an official warning.
01:05:42You're in breach of health standards regulations.
01:05:49I don't want some bloody publican from London
01:05:52turn the entire village into a car park
01:05:54and ruin it for everyone.
01:05:56For you, you mean?
01:05:57For everyone.
01:05:58Change the record, darling.
01:06:00You haven't had a hit for years.
01:06:02I suppose a boiled egg's out of the question.
01:06:16Morning, Dad.
01:06:21Good morning.
01:06:23I've got a surprise for you.
01:06:25Oh?
01:06:26Mm-hmm.
01:06:28Close your eyes.
01:06:40Open wide.
01:06:41Ah.
01:06:46Oh.
01:06:48It's wonderful.
01:06:50Amazing, huh?
01:06:52Absolutely.
01:06:53He's gifted.
01:06:55And he has the cutest daughter.
01:07:00You're happy here, then?
01:07:02Mm.
01:07:09You okay?
01:07:10Never better, darling.
01:07:12Never better.
01:07:17No one.
01:07:20I have a warrant to search the premises.
01:07:22Of course you do.
01:07:23What for?
01:07:24I'm sorry, sir.
01:07:25I couldn't possibly say.
01:07:26Of course you can.
01:07:27You better come in.
01:07:29How the hell did they know?
01:07:30I haven't got a clue.
01:07:40Sis.
01:07:41You've been closed, pending a review by the council.
01:07:44It's a summons.
01:07:45There have been a lot of complaints.
01:07:47You've outstayed your welcome.
01:07:50You know, the chap who normally does this gets paid ten pounds an hour.
01:07:54I gave him 200 to let me do this one.
01:07:57Best money I ever spent.
01:08:00One more thing.
01:08:01One more thing.
01:08:04She's mine.
01:08:05Keep your hands off.
01:08:06There's a good chap.
01:08:07Or things could get really nasty.
01:08:12I almost forgot.
01:08:14Ever wondered who wrote that review you have up in your kitchen?
01:08:19Kit?
01:08:21I see you have.
01:08:22Well done.
01:08:24Clever you.
01:08:27See you next Tuesday.
01:08:31Kit's boyfriend and her dad have shut us down.
01:08:36Kit's got a boyfriend.
01:08:40Hi.
01:08:41Good morning to you two.
01:08:48What's up with Grumpy?
01:08:51They're closing us down.
01:08:53What?
01:09:00Kate, leave him alone.
01:09:02They can't do this.
01:09:04They have.
01:09:05What can I do?
01:09:06I think you've done quite enough.
01:09:07What do you mean?
01:09:08Your dad, Forrester, they signed the complaint and your boyfriend left these.
01:09:12Oh my God.
01:09:13Oh so they are yours.
01:09:15He is not my boyfriend and I swear I don't know where he got these.
01:09:20Do you know anything about this?
01:09:22I've been trying to tell you.
01:09:24Of course you have.
01:09:25Get out.
01:09:26Oh Rob, please don't do this.
01:09:28Get out.
01:09:30You were cooking crap before and you know it.
01:09:34And if you think I'd screw you over then you don't know me very well.
01:09:36Well ain't that the truth.
01:09:37Get out.
01:09:41Just because your wife died and you have a cute kid, that doesn't give you the right to be.
01:09:45Okay, thank you.
01:09:46Bye.
01:09:47Close the door on your way out.
01:09:48Oh and Kate.
01:09:50Do me a favor.
01:09:52Don't say goodbye to Michelle.
01:10:06Say goodbye to Michelle.
01:10:07She's a big, ghost!
01:10:38Hey!
01:10:44Hey!
01:10:45What the hell are you doing?
01:10:51What?
01:10:52You Rob Haley?
01:10:53Yes.
01:10:54Good.
01:10:55Her Royal Highness will be here at 11.
01:10:57You've got to be ready by then, or there's going to be hell to pay.
01:11:00Her Royal Highness?
01:11:02Guy.
01:11:03Witherspoon.
01:11:06Mars!
01:11:07If they close us down, we get one great moment.
01:11:10If they don't, who knows?
01:11:11Well, then who's going to cook?
01:11:12You?
01:11:19It's a pity we got rid of the microwave.
01:11:23Just warm this up, and you'll be fine.
01:11:28Did you see this lady you gave that guest repub last week?
01:11:30It was called blooded murder.
01:11:32You'll be all right.
01:11:33Of course you will.
01:11:34It'll be fine.
01:11:34We'd be finer if Kate was here.
01:11:37Sure.
01:11:38Sometimes grown up swallow.
01:11:41Come and give me a good luck hug.
01:11:43Bite me.
01:11:44So, I can have a glass of wine when I've finished.
01:11:55Is that right, Tanya?
01:11:56Yes, Guy.
01:11:57As long as everyone's aware.
01:11:58You can do it.
01:12:16Of course you can.
01:12:17It'll be great.
01:12:18Really great.
01:12:20We have a critic to impress.
01:12:23Thank God.
01:12:24What about the hearing?
01:12:25Well, if they don't want us here,
01:12:26then we'll just have to go somewhere that they do.
01:12:28Wouldn't we?
01:12:30Come on!
01:12:36How much longer, Mr. Forrester?
01:12:39He should be here in a few minutes.
01:12:43At my signal, unleash hell.
01:12:46Where is Mr. Hayley?
01:12:52He probably realises it's a lost call.
01:12:55He should be here in a few minutes.
01:13:25I'm sorry I'm late.
01:13:30Kate, darling.
01:13:32So glad you came.
01:13:33Oh, yeah?
01:13:34How about dinner this evening to celebrate?
01:13:36Oh.
01:13:38You might want to stick these back in your collection.
01:13:42Gap haven't made them like this in ten years,
01:13:44and I bet they look real cute on you.
01:13:47How do you know?
01:13:48Mr. Templeton will not be joining us this morning,
01:13:57but he would like to withdraw all his complaints.
01:14:00What?
01:14:02And I am here on behalf of Mr. Hayley.
01:14:05Kate, you can't.
01:14:06Watch me.
01:14:07Look, could we just get on with this, please?
01:14:10Right.
01:14:12Let's start with the rats.
01:14:13Oh, your special subject, Mr. Forrester.
01:14:16There's a rather long list of complaints.
01:14:19All complete crap.
01:14:21I'm sorry.
01:14:21Can I say that here?
01:14:22The parking issues?
01:14:23What parking issues?
01:14:24Miss Templeton.
01:14:27The Hell's Angels.
01:14:29You're kidding, right?
01:14:30Miss Templeton, I warn you,
01:14:31if you interrupt again,
01:14:33we will eject you from the proceedings.
01:14:34All Rob Haley does
01:14:38is be a great cook and a great dad.
01:14:41If that's a crime,
01:14:42then we're all screwed.
01:14:46There must have been at least
01:14:47a hundred cars trying to get into the village.
01:14:49You couldn't breathe because of the fumes.
01:14:52There were even coaches of tourists.
01:14:54One coach.
01:14:55And it's not like they were on a gastronomic pilgrimage.
01:14:58It was a bunch of bare-ass
01:14:59f***ing rugby players.
01:15:01Out.
01:15:01If you can't get it through your pea-sized brain
01:15:03that he's been lying to me.
01:15:04Out.
01:15:04Kate, sometimes discretion
01:15:07is the better part of valour.
01:15:08You think valour's a couch covering?
01:15:11Out, Miss Templeton.
01:15:24Bye, Kate.
01:15:30One last thing, Mr. Forrester,
01:15:32if I may.
01:15:33The Hell's Angel.
01:15:36What kind of motorcycle was it?
01:15:43Here we are on this splendid, crisp, autumnal day,
01:15:47barely an hour away from the fleshpots of London,
01:15:50deep in the Arcadian splendours
01:15:52of the British countryside.
01:15:54And we're here to have lunch at the boot.
01:15:59Here, it must be said,
01:16:03despite the manifest splendours and beauties surrounding us,
01:16:09we are in a culinary desert.
01:16:12A culinary desert relieved by Rob Haley and his team
01:16:15who have created a veritable oasis
01:16:17serving British food
01:16:20with honest heart.
01:16:23Shall we go in?
01:16:25And cut!
01:16:25Straight through, not stumble.
01:16:27That looks good in the...
01:16:49Go.
01:16:50A modest little selection,
01:17:04but very carefully chosen.
01:17:05Warm salmon mousse
01:17:18with an English asparagus sauce.
01:17:21And...
01:17:21When you've finished...
01:17:24What's up?
01:17:24Would you have gold?
01:17:25Have you gone completely mad?
01:17:28Don't panic.
01:17:29It's apple juice.
01:17:30Guy,
01:17:31if you don't mind,
01:17:33we've got two more courses.
01:17:34Just give us an opinion, would you love?
01:17:37Action!
01:17:46Perfect.
01:17:46Beautiful textures.
01:17:48Extraordinary combination of flavours.
01:17:51Inspirational.
01:17:59So there we have it.
01:18:00Another excellent meal in convivial surroundings.
01:18:03Further proof, if any further proof were needed,
01:18:05that in the culinary steaks
01:18:07we can look our continental cousins
01:18:10squarely in the eye.
01:18:13So, as the good guide says,
01:18:16worth the detour.
01:18:19Bon appétit.
01:18:21And that's a wrap!
01:18:23And believe it, there is a god.
01:18:41Oh, for goodness sake, sit down, will you?
01:18:45Have a glass.
01:18:46Not for me, thanks.
01:18:47I couldn't bear the thought of starting over again.
01:18:50Two years,
01:18:50127 days.
01:18:54Oh, well.
01:18:55Er...
01:18:55Why don't you have some of this?
01:19:00Cherry-free, I promise you.
01:19:03Absolutely marvellous.
01:19:11Nice.
01:19:11Hey, Alfie.
01:19:23Hey, Alfie.
01:19:24Have we our last pint?
01:19:26Oh.
01:19:26Ah.
01:19:27You mind if I call Bertie?
01:19:30More the merrier.
01:19:31It's half a barrel left.
01:19:32Oh, great.
01:19:33Oh, great.
01:19:46The mystery hell's angel.
01:19:50Oh, how very flattering.
01:19:51Bloody hell.
01:19:52Yes, indeed.
01:19:53Yes, indeed.
01:19:54I've come to tell you that you can reopen.
01:19:56How?
01:19:57Why?
01:19:58Well, I suggest you put your tongue back in your mouth, get in your car and go and ask Kate.
01:20:02Er, no.
01:20:03Why are men so ridiculously obtuse sometimes?
01:20:06I'm sorry?
01:20:07Who do you think came to the council this morning on your behalf and saved your bacon?
01:20:12You're joking.
01:20:13No, I'm not.
01:20:15Yeah, but she still wrote that bloody awful review.
01:20:18Rob.
01:20:19In a minute.
01:20:20Rob.
01:20:20Jesus, Ross, get the man a drink.
01:20:21Rob.
01:20:22What?
01:20:23Don't be a bloody fool.
01:20:25She did you a favour.
01:20:32Oh, Christ.
01:20:33And despite everything, she still actually likes you.
01:20:36She does?
01:20:37So if you don't go after her now...
01:20:39Where is she?
01:20:42She's left for the airport.
01:20:50No, he never goes over 20 miles an hour.
01:20:52He's going to have to do better than that.
01:20:54No chance.
01:21:01Well.
01:21:03I'm better getting out of pain.
01:21:05Gotta look myself in the eye
01:21:08And say it's gonna be all right
01:21:12Maybe everything won't be all right
01:21:16All the time
01:21:18It's got a tight finish, tight seems where they lie
01:21:23It's gonna be all right
01:21:26Gotta see things at the time
01:21:30I'm sorry.
01:21:56You must be joking
01:22:01Hey, stop!
01:22:07Stop!
01:22:08Stop!
01:22:08Stop!
01:22:08Go!
01:22:08Stop!
01:22:08Stop!
01:22:09Stop!
01:22:29Stop!
01:22:29see i've never hit a thing even if it deserved hitting so it's 15 miles per hour or this
01:22:44all or nothing it's kind of hard in the car isn't it you got to take risks once in a while
01:22:49is that a fact i've been an idiot yes you have and you were right i was cooking awful just
01:22:55awful food you reminded me of who i was and what i was supposed to be and and what i could be
01:23:02i know the british are rubbish at saying anything heartfelt and i'm worse than most but i just
01:23:06wanted you to know that everything has changed because of you and and i just wanted you to know
01:23:11that before you left that's very sweet but you could have told me that next wednesday what i'm
01:23:22only going to paris for a week i don't care if it was for a week or a day or an hour it was totally
01:23:28worth it from now on i'll do the driving why i thought it turned out rather well
01:23:51so there we have it another excellent meal in convivial surroundings further proof if any
01:24:10further proof were needed that in the culinary stakes we can look our continental cousins squarely
01:24:17in the eye so as the good guy says worth the detour bon appetit
01:24:26what the hell are you lot looking at get back to bloody work
01:24:32you love the shade
01:24:37open the window introduce another day you met your match last night
01:24:47you got lost in the storm searching for another life
01:24:54i found a melody to sing
01:24:57i think today's gonna break
01:25:02everything sunshine
01:25:05everything brighter
01:25:07everything left for us to do
01:25:10falling in order
01:25:12don't you think some days
01:25:16better than never
01:25:17don't you think all we're going through leads us to all we never knew
01:25:23everything sunshine
01:25:25and i don't miss you then
01:25:30you look like you're up for fun
01:25:37so put on your nice shoes and dance until what's done is done
01:25:44i've got a second wind
01:25:48i thought it was ending
01:25:51we're only just about to begin
01:25:54i've got a melody to sing
01:25:59i think today's gonna bring
01:26:03everything sunshine
01:26:06everything brighter
01:26:08everything left for us to do
01:26:11falling in order
01:26:13don't you think some days
01:26:16better than never
01:26:18don't you think all we're going through leads us to all we never knew
01:26:23everything sunshine
01:26:29tell me we'll get better babe
01:26:31tell me we're alright
01:26:34remember of those lonely evenings and every sleepless night
01:26:39told me that you loved me then and you said you love me now
01:26:44and though we only learn as fast as time will allow
01:26:49everything sunshine
01:26:58everything sunshine
01:27:00everything brighter
01:27:02everything left for us to do
01:27:05is
01:27:19and i don't miss a thing
01:27:22Oh, we never knew, everything's sunshine
01:27:25And I don't miss a thing
01:27:52I don't miss a thing
01:28:22I don't miss a thing
01:28:52I don't miss a thing
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