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Here We Go Season 3 Episode 1
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00:00I just wish I knew what was going on in there.
00:07Someone is stealing our spoons.
00:10The ants are back.
00:17Amy!
00:19Please!
00:25That was good that time, wasn't it?
00:27Not really, no.
00:28Is that banana meant to be a knife?
00:30No, it's meant to be a banana. I'm going to eat it.
00:32What's going on? Can you call me?
00:33No, Sam's just helping me with self-defence,
00:35and I need you to take that down, please.
00:37What? I've only just finished it.
00:39It's massive, and I need it out of my way.
00:42Well, that's what the French said at first.
00:44A lot of people wanted it pulled down,
00:45and now it's the most visited tourist attraction in the world, so...
00:49Oh, Amy, isn't it wonderful?
00:51Oh, it's like being in Paris.
00:53It's like being in Legoland.
00:55Are you not putting the flag on?
00:57What? What flag?
00:58For the tippy-top.
01:00Right, I'm off to the high street.
01:02OK.
01:03I'm taking one of the fobs, Rachel.
01:04Yeah.
01:05And I'll meet you at the escape shop at 3.
01:08Escape room.
01:09OK, bye, Sue.
01:10I'll see you later, Paul.
01:11I've just watched it.
01:12OK, everyone, listen up, please.
01:14I'm going to take my oatmeal bath now for my...
01:17Bum rash.
01:18Upper thigh rash.
01:19Thank you, Sam.
01:20And I shall be at least an hour.
01:22Please do not disturb.
01:24Thank you for that totally unnecessary announcement.
01:25You go and stew in your porridge.
01:26What are you looking for?
01:27I've lost the French flag for the top.
01:30It's not finished without it.
01:31OK.
01:32God, it's taken me ages.
01:34Er...
01:35Why is the door locked?
01:36I guess the smart locks are on.
01:38Where's the fob?
01:39I think Granny had it, didn't she?
01:40Oh.
01:41What?
01:42Oh, no.
01:43What?
01:44Erm...
01:45Has she locked us in?
01:46Oh, she's locked us in.
01:47What?
01:48Yeah, she's locked us in.
01:49Er...
01:50Go and get your dad, Sam.
01:51He's bathing in oatmeal.
01:52Go after your granny, Amy, and tell her she's locked us in.
01:55Yeah, I can't.
01:56She's locked us in.
01:57She's locked us in.
01:58Sam, go and get your dad.
01:59Put the camera down.
02:00We're locked in.
02:01Oh, God.
02:02We're locked in.
02:03We're locked in.
02:04Sam, go!
02:05Fine!
02:06Oh...
02:07Why am I nervous?
02:09What is it?
02:11Ta-da!
02:13Happy anniversary.
02:15Oh, babe.
02:18Huh?
02:19Yeah?
02:20I didn't think you...
02:21I didn't think you were going to get me one.
02:22Ah!
02:23Because...
02:25Because...
02:26And this is so funny.
02:28It really is funny.
02:30Erm...
02:31I got one as well.
02:33Ah!
02:37You got a big green egg for yourself?
02:40No, I...
02:41Well, for you.
02:43For me?
02:45Are you joking?
02:46For us.
02:47For the family.
02:49The discount code was about to expire,
02:51and you said you weren't getting me one.
02:53Yeah, because I wanted it to be a surprise.
02:55Where's your one, then?
02:56It hasn't arrived yet.
02:57OK, so my anniversary present isn't even here in time,
03:00and it's a barbecue.
03:01Oh, wow.
03:02This is great.
03:03Come on, you two.
03:04Your anniversary pancakes are ready.
03:07Oh, yeah.
03:08Huh?
03:09You know, I'm sorry, babe.
03:10I'll send back the other one.
03:11That one's full whack as well.
03:13Trust you to find the discount code, you stingy kid.
03:15Happy anniversary.
03:1725 years.
03:19Oh, it's not that long, actually.
03:21Well, it feels long, Sue.
03:23Baggies.
03:24And it's the same length as a minimum life sentence,
03:26appropriately.
03:27Yeah, well...
03:28Why are you standing like that?
03:29Just sit on a stool.
03:30Hmm?
03:31No reason.
03:33He...
03:34He can't sit down because of his body rash.
03:37Ha-ha-ha.
03:38Upper thigh rash, Mum!
03:39And I thought I told you that in confidence.
03:41Have you still not been to the doctor?
03:43I will.
03:44I just...
03:45I need to send him some photos.
03:46I'm finding it really difficult to get it at the right angle.
03:49Oh, my God.
03:50And in the light.
03:51Do you want me to take it, Paul?
03:52No, Mum!
03:53Well, we could use that angle-poised lamp.
03:56Oh, my God, no!
03:57Ugh.
03:58I don't want you shining a light up my bum like you're interrogating it.
04:01I thought it was your upper thigh.
04:03Hmm.
04:04Where's the Pepper H?
04:05I don't know.
04:06Go and have a look.
04:07You're the one standing up.
04:08Doorbell!
04:09All right, jeez.
04:10Pepper, don't put pepper on your strawberries, you pervert.
04:13Shut up!
04:14Oh, hey, Robin, Cherry.
04:16Robin and Cherry are here.
04:17All right, Paolo, Spielberg.
04:18Give chairs a bit of space, will you?
04:20Yeah.
04:21It's actually easier if I come in backwards because of the set.
04:24Boop!
04:25Boop!
04:26Caution.
04:27Vehicle reverser.
04:28Who is that?
04:29I told you.
04:30Oh, Cheryl.
04:31Look at the size of you.
04:32Yes.
04:33I know.
04:34I'm sick of it, to be honest, though.
04:35I feel like a bloody hot air balloon.
04:36A smoking hot air balloon.
04:37Thank you very much.
04:38I find it, honestly, very attractive.
04:40It does.
04:41It's a problem.
04:42It is.
04:43It's the last thing she needs at this stage.
04:44This idiot doubling down on the pregnancy.
04:45Oh, my God.
04:46It's doubling down.
04:47Yeah.
04:48Anyway.
04:49Bon anniversary.
04:50Doesn't that mean happy birthday?
04:5225 magical years of being my brother-in-law.
04:57I know.
04:58I can't believe it, eh?
04:59Mwah.
05:00Fantastic.
05:02It's my anniversary to you.
05:03Well, you get any nice presents?
05:04We both got each other the same barbecue, which only he wanted,
05:08and I think it's hideous, so no, not really.
05:11OK.
05:12And I got you the smart locks.
05:13Yes.
05:14Smart locks.
05:15Super secure, you know, digital locks.
05:17Oh.
05:18Because of the burglary spree recently.
05:20Spree?
05:21Oh.
05:22And the locksmith's going to fit them on Tuesday.
05:23It's not a spree, Mum, OK?
05:25I mean, we've hardly even talked about it down at the station.
05:28They're going on all the doors and windows.
05:30And Penny got us one of those smart frames.
05:32Oh, yeah.
05:33Which link up to your photo library.
05:34Yeah, I know.
05:35Yeah, pretty cool.
05:36I'll get it.
05:37Oh!
05:38Oh!
05:39Who's got your Lego Eiffel Tower?
05:40Oh, no, that's mine.
05:41Grow up.
05:42I'm clearing out the last of my stuff.
05:43Ah.
05:44Yeah.
05:45Is it full size?
05:46Oh.
05:47It...
05:48Well, no.
05:49I mean...
05:50I don't...
05:51I doubt it.
05:52It's 149 centimetres when fully erect,
05:54and the Eiffel Tower's pretty big and all.
05:56Millimetres, more like.
05:57Erm...
05:58Yeah, actually.
05:59Yeah.
06:00Give or take.
06:01You going to build it, then, or what?
06:02Well, no, not right now.
06:03I'm too busy job hunting.
06:04Oh, yeah.
06:05Have you seriously not got any pepper, Mum?
06:07Oh, I've got some in me bag.
06:10Have you?
06:11There's pepper in your bag, Sue.
06:13It's the spray.
06:14You're funny.
06:15The spray?
06:16As in pepper spray?
06:18Yeah.
06:19Just squirt a bit.
06:20Oh!
06:21Do not squirt pepper spray near me, Sue,
06:23because it might make the baby, you know.
06:25Sneeze.
06:26No, it's stupid.
06:27Oh, yeah.
06:28Can't be around sprays.
06:29I won't even let him spray Link's Java.
06:30QED.
06:31Why have you got pepper spray, Sue?
06:32Oh, sorry.
06:33Well, the burglaries, Rachel, and Bren saw a flasher a few weeks back.
06:37What, so you'd pepper spray a flasher?
06:39I would, yes.
06:40Yeah.
06:41The dirty devil.
06:42Blast him in the eyes and the bits.
06:44Okay, all right.
06:45Upstairs, down here.
06:46All right.
06:47Where did you even get it?
06:48Yeah, exactly.
06:49Er, just, you know, what's it called now?
06:52Oh, the dark web.
06:53The dark web?
06:54I love the dark web.
06:55What?
06:56You're 77, you can barely manage the light web.
06:59Can you put pepper spray on food?
07:01Of course not.
07:02Yeah, of course you can.
07:03I love that, Mum.
07:04It's illegal.
07:05Is it?
07:06Just do the self-defence class with Rachel if you're worried about that.
07:08Yeah, exactly.
07:09Well, you're doing a self-defence course, are you, Rach?
07:11I thought you were off counselling prisoners at the moment.
07:13Well, that's why she's doing it.
07:14She assumes they're going to attack her.
07:16No, I do not assume anything, thank you.
07:18You know, most convicted criminals the victims of circumstance and deserve are compassion.
07:23Ding.
07:24That said, if any of them do get aggressive, I need to know how to beat them off.
07:29OK, one way to deal with a flasher.
07:30Yeah, that's a little bit too much compassion on.
07:32As in, don't be childish.
07:33As in, getting them into a hold and bringing them safely to a...
07:38Planets?
07:39Prison officers, stop it.
07:41Come on then, Rach.
07:42Let's see the old beat-off in action.
07:43Come on, come on, come on.
07:44Ow!
07:45Well, the first video is about adrenaline control and...
07:47Oh, OK.
07:48I do panic a bit when taken by a surprise, so...
07:51Right, yeah.
07:52Actually, I give you all permission to startle me whenever you want.
07:55OK.
07:56Great.
07:57Don't mind if I do.
07:58Ta-da!
07:59Yeah, I was all right then.
08:00You were.
08:01What's this?
08:02OK, so this is your anniversary gift for me and Chez.
08:06Say hello to...
08:07Hopefully a good one.
08:08Doink, Tim!
08:09Woo!
08:10To who?
08:11Tim, he's a home assistant.
08:13Yeah, he's like the Alexa of Bulgaria, so...
08:15Oh, yeah, yeah.
08:16What?
08:17He's an assistant in that box.
08:19No.
08:20No.
08:21OK, so he's a smart home hub, Sue.
08:23So what you do, you plug him in, and then Tim can tell you if it's raining...
08:27Well, I can do that.
08:29Or, you know, what time Gardener's World's on.
08:32Eight o'clock on a Friday night.
08:34OK, and things you can't do, Sue.
08:36Like, he can play any song.
08:37Well, I can play some of them.
08:38OK, yeah, but he's online.
08:40He's always listening.
08:41He's the...
08:42OK.
08:43Why would we want a Bulgarian robot always listening, Robin?
08:46Well, rude.
08:47Spying on us.
08:48That is a bit rude.
08:49You know, smart locks, smart frames, smart homes.
08:53I mean, when did everything suddenly have to be smart?
08:56You know, what's wrong with the old thicko version of things?
08:58OK, OK, well, this is from me and Sam to encourage a couple of old thickos to be smart.
09:04OK.
09:05What is it?
09:07Erm, we booked an escape room.
09:10Yes!
09:11Why?
09:12I love an escape room.
09:13Well, this is what marriage is.
09:14One big escape room, everyone desperately looking for a way out.
09:16Yeah.
09:17It was to make you work together a bit, you know, help you two communicate.
09:20But do communicate, Sam.
09:21If anything, we communicate too much, actually.
09:24OK, you bought each other the same barbecue.
09:26Yeah.
09:27Well, I'm really pumped.
09:28Well, of course you are.
09:29You know, I don't want to be rude, but this present is worse than nothing.
09:33OK, you're welcome.
09:35Your strategy games make him unbearable.
09:38Just take over and boss me around again.
09:41I won't!
09:42You will!
09:43I won't, all right?
09:44We're going to do this together as a team.
09:47I won't take over, Rach, OK?
09:49I promise.
09:52Oh, Dad.
09:53I can't find the flag anywhere.
09:56Look for the fob, Amy, not the flag.
09:58The door is smart-locked.
09:59If we can't find the fob, then we're genuinely staring down the barrel
10:02of missing the escape room.
10:04Oh, God, that'd be great.
10:05Or bring the escape room here.
10:06Oh, yes.
10:07Right, can everyone just calm down, please?
10:09We'll be honest.
10:10Calm.
10:11You're the only one that isn't calm.
10:12There were two fobs, right?
10:14Mum only took one.
10:15So, basic maths dictates...
10:18Oh, my God.
10:19There's one fob in the house, yes.
10:21You don't need to basic maths dictate.
10:23This is why I don't do games with you.
10:24You get so pompous and bossy.
10:26Oh, right.
10:27Don't snipe, Rachel.
10:28This isn't exactly ideal for me, either.
10:30I just pulled the plug on my oatmeal bath.
10:32Literally.
10:33The locksmith's not answering.
10:34Right, OK.
10:35I'm going to look over there.
10:36You call Robin.
10:37Yeah, you can say, please.
10:38We're locked in, not in the army.
10:39Where did Granny say she put the fob?
10:41I don't know.
10:42I don't actually listen to what she says to me, Amy.
10:44Hi, Robin.
10:45Hi.
10:46Yeah, no, we're locked in.
10:47Yeah.
10:48Can you get over here as soon as you can?
10:52Oh, that was quick.
10:53I'll get it!
10:56Oh, yeah, it's locked, isn't it?
10:57Yeah.
10:58Delivery.
10:59Oh, yeah.
11:00Is it...
11:01Can it fit through the letterbox?
11:03Don't think so.
11:04It's a barbecue.
11:05Oh, my God.
11:06It's the egg.
11:07It's the second big green egg.
11:08I thought you'd send that back.
11:09It had already been dispatched, so they wouldn't let me.
11:10Hello.
11:11We're sending it back.
11:12What?
11:13Yeah, we've already got one.
11:15Got one!
11:16Why'd you order another one, then?
11:17Exactly!
11:18Great question!
11:19Well, because...
11:20None of your beeswax why, mate.
11:22OK?
11:23We are...
11:24We are returning it.
11:25I'm gonna try Sue again.
11:26Can you open the door?
11:27Oh, great idea.
11:28Hadn't thought of that.
11:29We're not choosing to speak to you through the letterbox, pal.
11:32We're locked in.
11:33OK?
11:34Even so, I am refusing the delivery.
11:37You can only do that in person.
11:39Well, I am in person.
11:40I'm just behind a door.
11:42I am a person.
11:43In person!
11:44I am in person!
11:46He's leaving it, Dad.
11:47Oh, look.
11:48Do not leave it there.
11:49Do not leave it there.
11:50I'm a policeman.
11:51I command you not to leave it there.
11:52Squire!
11:53Squire!
11:54Squire!
11:55He's gone, Dad.
11:58Bloody hell!
11:59Oh, Sue!
12:00Sue!
12:01I'm through, I'm through!
12:02Sue!
12:03Sue, can you hear me?
12:04Mum!
12:05Listen, you're gonna have to head back because you've locked us all in!
12:06Come on!
12:07I didn't, actually.
12:08Granny left her phone in the kitchen.
12:09Great.
12:12I'm on the app, Dad, but we need the activation code to sign up.
12:15OK, how do we get the code?
12:16It's printed on the fobs.
12:18Great news!
12:19Whoa, Dad!
12:20Your dressing gown's coming open.
12:21Oh!
12:22Oh, well, don't look at it!
12:23I'm not looking at it!
12:24Mr. Sash is very feeble!
12:27Who's that?
12:28Is that someone at the door?
12:29What?
12:30Are they burglars?
12:31Who are they?
12:32I don't know.
12:33Oh, my God!
12:34Oh, my God, are they taking the egg?
12:35Do not take the egg!
12:37I command you, I am a policeman!
12:40Barely.
12:41Drop that egg in the name of the law!
12:43Stop that!
12:44They're just ignoring you.
12:45Stop it!
12:47Great.
12:48Well, that's great.
12:49I mean, thank God we've got two.
12:53They were very expensive.
12:54Hmm.
12:55Well, that one was what with the discount code?
12:57No, we're calling the police completely.
12:58He is the police.
12:59No.
13:00I am a police.
13:01I am not the police.
13:02And we're not calling them us.
13:03Why not?
13:04We have been burgled!
13:05No, I mean, we left something outside our front door.
13:07We didn't leave it out there!
13:08It makes us look like goons!
13:10We are goons.
13:11We're trapped inside our own house.
13:12Yeah, but if the guys at the station find out about this,
13:15then they might make fun of me.
13:17Oh.
13:18Anyway, there's no point.
13:19We've got a doorbell camera.
13:20We'll have footage of their thieving faces.
13:22Look, the police won't, you know, investigate.
13:25Why not?
13:26We don't catch burglars anymore, Rachel.
13:28It's not the 1950s.
13:29Well, what do you do all day, then?
13:31Eat donuts and glare at people outside stadiums, mainly.
13:33And other stuff!
13:35Mmm.
13:36I'm going to try calling my mum again.
13:37Oh, my God.
13:38I have her phone!
13:39You'd literally just be calling me!
13:40Whoa, whoa!
13:41Hey!
13:42Now, cup of tea, John boy, and a wagon wheel as a coaster.
13:47Nah, I'm good, thanks.
13:48Nearly finished fitting the smart look, anyway.
13:50Oh, well.
13:51I'll leave it in case you change your mind.
13:53Oh, wow, look at that.
13:54That photo frame is clever, isn't it?
13:56Yeah, it's smart, like the locks.
13:58Anniversary gifts.
14:00Aw, congratulations.
14:01Tim.
14:02Tim.
14:03Ooh.
14:04And then come in with the elbow, and then follow up with the wrist, the heel of the head.
14:07Boo!
14:08Sam!
14:09What?
14:10Are you talking to Stalin?
14:11Yes, well, I wasn't ready!
14:12Well, that's the idea, isn't it?
14:14Oh!
14:15Tim.
14:16Tim.
14:17Tim.
14:18Tim.
14:19Tim!
14:20Are you sure it's on?
14:21Yeah, you know, he's definitely listening.
14:22Look, cos the light's on.
14:23Tim.
14:24Tim.
14:25Tim.
14:26Why isn't he responding?
14:27Well, he's Bulgarian, remember, Paolo?
14:28Tim.
14:29You meant to be saying it right.
14:30Tim.
14:31Tim!
14:32Oh, can you look for a four-by-two flat grey piece, Granny?
14:34Yeah.
14:35Amy, can you pick up this letter, please?
14:36That's what I'm doing.
14:37Yeah, but not one piece at a time.
14:39Tim.
14:40It'll take ages.
14:41What's his problem?
14:42Why can't you do this in your flat?
14:43Come in, Tim.
14:44Well, Maya's working from home this week, so it'll get in her way.
14:46Tim.
14:47Yeah, but I'm working from home, and it's getting in my way.
14:50Tim.
14:51Can I report your grandmother to do it to, please?
14:53She's not forcing me.
14:54Tim.
14:55We're a team.
14:56Yeah, exactly.
14:57Tim.
14:58Tim.
14:59Timbo.
15:00Timothy.
15:01How can I help you?
15:02Whoa, that's creepy.
15:03Well, go on then, Paolo.
15:04I'll ask him something quickly before he goes away.
15:06Wow, OK.
15:07I don't know what to ask him.
15:09What time is it?
15:1110.26.
15:12The time is now 10.26.
15:15See?
15:16Waste of space.
15:17Anyone want a wagon wheel?
15:19Oh, yeah, go on.
15:20Hey there.
15:21Oh, no!
15:22Chill out, Rach.
15:23Are you all right?
15:24Yeah, I'm fine.
15:25I'm doing a self-defence course, sorry.
15:27OK, nice.
15:28So I just finished fitting your locks?
15:30Yeah.
15:31Fantastic.
15:32Let me walk you through the system.
15:33OK, great.
15:34Thanks, John.
15:35Thank you, John.
15:36Is it John boy?
15:37Cool.
15:38Oh, is it your anniversary, Dan?
15:39Uh-huh.
15:40Look at that lovely couple.
15:41Your wife is hot, isn't it?
15:42No, no, that's my mum.
15:43Oh.
15:44That's not my wife.
15:45Sorry.
15:46My mum.
15:47Sorry about that.
15:48Are you doing anything nice for it?
15:50Yeah, we are, actually, yeah.
15:51Yeah, we're going to an escape room tomorrow.
15:53Oh, no way.
15:54You're doing Temple of the Sphinx?
15:55Yeah, exactly.
15:56Well, I warn you, it is hard.
15:58Yeah.
15:59I mean, like, rock hard.
16:00You've got to sort of work out all them hieroglyphics and that.
16:02Hieroglyphics.
16:03Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:04And then you've got to sort of, like, put the gods in high order.
16:07Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:08Please don't tell me.
16:09No, no.
16:10Sure.
16:11And look, I didn't get the medal when I did it.
16:12Right, because I don't want to...
16:13There's a medal, is there?
16:14Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:15You get it if you get the code on the side of the mummy's body box.
16:19Sarcophagus.
16:20Yeah, please don't ruin it.
16:21Yeah.
16:22Okay, cool.
16:23Yeah, yeah.
16:24So...
16:25Oh!
16:26Smart locks.
16:27Yes.
16:28The app will lock and unlock the windows and doors at once.
16:31Yeah.
16:32Yeah?
16:33Yeah.
16:34And download the app.
16:35I would if I was you.
16:36Good.
16:37Yeah?
16:38Control it from your phone, and it will basically stop you getting locked in or out.
16:41Oh, my God.
16:42What?
16:43Dad.
16:44What?
16:45What is it?
16:46Whoa, come on.
16:47Who's...
16:48Don't look at that.
16:49Just don't look at it.
16:50Whatever you're into, there is no judgement.
16:51I'm not into that.
16:52What would that even be?
16:53It's a rash, okay?
16:54I had to take a picture to send to my GP.
16:56Can we just...
16:57But why did you take so many?
16:59Because I couldn't see what was going on down there.
17:01Oh.
17:02So I had to just...
17:03It's the arse, is it?
17:04Yes, it's the arse, okay?
17:05Oh, hey.
17:06But it's okay.
17:07Can we just focus on the smart locks, please, John?
17:09Yeah, yeah, yeah.
17:10Boy.
17:11Old mill bath.
17:12You need to do one.
17:13Trust me.
17:14What, is this about the escape rooms again?
17:15Because I really don't want to know.
17:16Escape room?
17:17No, no.
17:18This is bum-related.
17:19Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
17:20My grandad, same problem.
17:21All right?
17:22I mean, look, he's one as angry as yours.
17:24Old mill bath?
17:25Sort it right out.
17:26Okay.
17:27I'll check it out.
17:28How old's your grandad?
17:29Oh, do you know what?
17:30There's actually a water level in your escape room.
17:32He's 86.
17:33You're sort of like, you're fishing.
17:34Yeah, can we focus on the locks again?
17:35Yeah, yeah, no, no.
17:36But you've got this sort of magnetic fishing stick.
17:38Rod.
17:39Yeah, yeah, yeah, Rod.
17:40I don't want to know.
17:41And you've sort of got to get Pharaoh's coins from the well.
17:43Yeah, okay.
17:44And it's...
17:45Wow, bruv, that is...
17:46Nah, that's not okay, you know.
17:48Nah, that is bad, isn't it?
17:51Aggressive.
17:53Oh, well...
17:54Well, you don't know what...
17:55Do you want to zoom in on that?
17:56Yeah.
17:57So how many fobs do we get?
17:59Rage!
18:00Robin!
18:01Oh, Robin!
18:02You okay?
18:03Robin, yes, no, we're locked in.
18:04And we've had a barbecue stolen.
18:05And the escape room starts in five minutes.
18:07Yeah.
18:08Okay, don't worry, I've got this.
18:09I'm going to jimmy the lock.
18:10Jimmy Howe.
18:11What does that mean?
18:12Just a case of sliding in the old flexible, eh, friend.
18:15What friend?
18:16Great.
18:17You've got a friend?
18:18And then finding the biting point.
18:20Okay, hurry up then.
18:21And then carefully easing open the...
18:24Oh.
18:25Oh.
18:26Oh.
18:27Oh.
18:28That one snapped, Robin.
18:29Yeah, cheers.
18:30I know.
18:31Don't worry, she's the old American Express.
18:32That'll do nicely.
18:33Don't break all your cards, you, Bill.
18:35You need it.
18:36No, I know.
18:37Don't worry, babe.
18:38It's just, look, I went in at the wrong angle last time.
18:39Here we go.
18:40Find that biting point.
18:41That's it.
18:42Looking good.
18:43And then just very gently just...
18:44Oh.
18:45Oh.
18:46You fell.
18:47Okay, anyone got any cards they can put through the letterbox?
18:50Well, not any that we want snapped, no.
18:52Just barge it down, Robin.
18:54Oh, gosh.
18:55Really, Terry?
18:56Barge it down?
18:57Can you do that, Robin?
18:58Can you barge it?
18:59Yes.
19:00Oh, I can barge it.
19:01Don't you worry about that.
19:02Yeah, a bit of the old onion barging.
19:04No problem.
19:05Um...
19:06I mean, judging by his previous goes, he'll probably just snap himself in two.
19:10Oh, the whole door.
19:11Yeah.
19:12Everyone stand back.
19:13Okay, Sam, get back.
19:14Come on.
19:15I mean, do we want the door barged out?
19:16Well, not really, no.
19:17I don't know if we can...
19:18Art nouveau, that is.
19:19It coming!
19:20Oh!
19:21Oh!
19:22Oh!
19:23It didn't work.
19:24Yeah, we got that, Cherry.
19:25Thanks.
19:26You all right, Robin?
19:27No.
19:28Can you not just, like, open a window or something?
19:32No, no, no, because they're all smart locked.
19:34But, I mean, unless one of them was already open.
19:36The bathroom window's open.
19:38Really?
19:39I opened it when I ran my oatmeal bath, because it was so steamy.
19:42We can't jump out.
19:43It's on the first floor.
19:44Oh, well, yeah, but I can jump in, climb in.
19:46Can you?
19:47Big time.
19:48I can waddle around the back and then nancy-wancy spider-man way up the water spout.
19:51Oh, amazing.
19:52Well, they're all coming together.
19:53That's great.
19:54Cherry, you get in the car, drive to the high street and see if you can find Mum.
19:58My Mum.
19:59Right.
20:00Robin, you shimmy up the water spout.
20:01Yeah.
20:02Rachel, Amy, you look for the fob.
20:04Go, go, go!
20:05What?
20:06Stop bossing us around.
20:07We're a team.
20:08You're not in charge.
20:09Yeah.
20:10Well, I'm hereby taking charge.
20:11What do you mean you're hereby taking charge?
20:12Rachel, baby.
20:13Some people thrive in a crisis, okay?
20:16And some people get startled.
20:17And I'm not being horrible.
20:18They melt.
20:19And you, if we're being honest, are a melter.
20:22So just follow my lead.
20:23I got this.
20:26Wow.
20:27Unbelievable.
20:28Grasp the frame.
20:29You can do it, Robin.
20:30Go on, Robin.
20:31I've got you.
20:32Don't drop him.
20:33I've got you.
20:34Should you fall?
20:35Oh, careful, careful.
20:36Oh, you are an absolute hero.
20:38Come on.
20:39Anything.
20:40Yeah.
20:41Yes!
20:42Yes!
20:43How does this actually help?
20:44Having Robin in here as well?
20:46I'm not sure, actually.
20:48Well, better to be inside the tent pissing out than outside the tent pissing in.
20:52Why are you pissing at all in this tent metaphor?
20:54I do need a widdle.
20:55Do you?
20:56Yeah, after that.
20:57I could ask you to...
20:58This will go, shall we?
20:59Oh, Dad!
21:00Your dressing gown again.
21:01Oh!
21:02Oh, I'm sorry.
21:03Oh!
21:04I am well sweaty after that as well.
21:05If I can just borrow some Dio while the cat's away.
21:08Yes, of course.
21:09Oh, that's pepper spray, Robin!
21:10What?
21:11Oh, God!
21:12Ah!
21:13Ah!
21:14Ah!
21:15Ah!
21:16Don't breathe, Sam!
21:17Ah!
21:18Ah!
21:19Ah!
21:20Get down, Sam!
21:21Everything!
21:22Everything!
21:23Ah!
21:24Ah!
21:25Ah!
21:26Ah!
21:27Ah!
21:28Ah!
21:29Ah!
21:30I mean, you can have some of my oatmeal if you like.
21:32Thanks.
21:33What?
21:34I'm not hungry.
21:35What are you talking about?
21:36No.
21:37My oatmeal bath.
21:38There's some sloppy bits at the bottom and there's some in the kitchen, you know.
21:40They work wonders on my bum rash.
21:41Yeah, they did.
21:42Was your bum rash this red, was it?
21:43Well, it was like that?
21:44Yeah.
21:45Oh, God.
21:46Ah!
21:47Oh, my God!
21:48Why are your privates everywhere?
21:49I know!
21:50It's a sash!
21:51Why?
21:52Why?
21:53And the bottom is not one of the privates, Amy!
21:54Well, none of us want that public, so can you just cover up?
21:57Yeah, put it away.
21:58Oh!
21:59What's that noise?
22:00Oh!
22:01Is there someone in the garden?
22:02What?
22:03What?
22:04Is there?
22:05Oh!
22:06I did leave the side gate open, I think, actually.
22:07Oh, come on, Robin!
22:08Oh, my God!
22:09Whoa!
22:10Dad!
22:11Huh?
22:12No!
22:13No!
22:14Not the other egg!
22:15Dad's dressing gowns.
22:16Oh!
22:17Don't look at me!
22:18Oh, my God!
22:19Oh!
22:20They need to be strung up!
22:21They're saving bloody scumbags!
22:22I thought criminals were victims of circumstance and deserve compassion.
22:24Yeah.
22:25Except what they're stealing from us, obviously.
22:26I mean...
22:27Do you like that barbecue?
22:28No, that does help a tiny bit.
22:29Oh, God.
22:30Oh, so what's the plan, then?
22:32Seeing as you're in charge.
22:34Yeah, I'm phoning the police now!
22:36Hi, hello.
22:37Police, please.
22:38Yeah, and actually, also a fire brigade.
22:41And ambulance, Paolo.
22:42What?
22:43Really?
22:44Wouldn't say no, yeah.
22:45And an ambulance.
22:46Yeah, it's a full house.
22:48Well, we're locked in.
22:50My brother-in-law has pepper sprayed his armpits, and we've had two big green eggs stolen.
22:55Two eggs stolen?
22:56So, it's all three eggs.
22:58No, I'm fine.
22:59They're barbecues.
23:00Oh, my God!
23:01There it is!
23:02What?
23:03The fob?
23:04Oh!
23:05Hold the line.
23:06We might be all right.
23:07Yeah.
23:08Throw the flag!
23:09Oh.
23:10Oh.
23:11Oh, God, so gaming.
23:12Oh, no, that's what you wanted.
23:13No.
23:14I can finally finish it.
23:15God.
23:16False alarm.
23:17Oh, God.
23:18We're still locked in.
23:19Although the oatmeal seems to be working very well.
23:21Oh, yeah.
23:22Oh, yeah.
23:23Oh, sorry.
23:24Oatmeal.
23:25Laura is putting oatmeal on his burns.
23:26Tell him it's soothing.
23:27It's soothing.
23:28Yeah.
23:29No, it's still very much an emergency.
23:31Yeah.
23:32Yeah.
23:33Well, I am meant to be solving an escape room literally right now.
23:35We.
23:36We are.
23:37It's not just you.
23:38We're meant to do the escape room together.
23:40As a team.
23:41How can I help you?
23:42Help me!
23:43Oh!
23:44Ah!
23:50What have you done?
23:52I'm so sorry.
23:55I didn't mean to.
23:57Erm.
23:58I was startled by Tim.
24:00Oh.
24:01Yeah.
24:02Yeah, no.
24:03My wife just knocked over the Eiffel Tower.
24:05Why me?
24:06Yeah.
24:07No, the Lego one.
24:08I'm not mad.
24:09Yeah.
24:10Although, I am actually a policeman if that makes a difference here.
24:13It won't.
24:14No?
24:15Okay.
24:16Cool.
24:17Why did you even turn Tim on?
24:18I didn't.
24:19I said, Tim.
24:20How can I help you?
24:21Shut up, Tim.
24:22To remind your dad that we need to work together.
24:24It's his fault, in a way.
24:25Team.
24:26Yeah.
24:27How can I help you?
24:28I actually know a Bulgarian called Team.
24:29I should have got that.
24:30Well, the police aren't coming, which means we have to wait for Mum, which means we're
24:33going to miss the escape room.
24:34Oh.
24:35We're just going to give up.
24:36Well, I just don't think there's anything we can do, Sam.
24:38Hang on.
24:39Wait a minute.
24:40Er.
24:41Tim.
24:42Er.
24:43Team.
24:44How can I help you?
24:45Er.
24:46Robert, he listens to everything we say, right?
24:47Er.
24:48Well, when he's on, yeah.
24:49Why?
24:50I help you.
24:51Do you remember hearing anyone say where they were putting a fob in the last couple
24:55of days?
24:56Checking entries for fob Thursday at 9.26.
25:00Now everyone listen.
25:02I'm putting the fobs in the jar by the sink.
25:05Rachel, Amy, are you listening to me?
25:09Would anyone like a wagon wheel?
25:12No way.
25:13Oh, Rachel.
25:14You're a genius.
25:15That's amazing.
25:16I can't believe it.
25:17I can't believe it.
25:18I did it.
25:19I'm so sorry I called you a melter.
25:20That's all right.
25:21Well, don't do it again.
25:22Oh, I love you.
25:23Happy anniversary.
25:24Oh, that's nice.
25:26Oh, I said we make a great team.
25:28How can I help you?
25:30I mean, it is really creepy.
25:31He listens to everything, though, isn't it?
25:32No, it's appalling.
25:33We'll have to put it in the bin.
25:34Oh, uh-oh.
25:35That's the locksmith.
25:36Hey!
25:37Hello, John Boy.
25:39Hang on.
25:40This doesn't mean we're still doing the escape room.
25:41Surely.
25:42OK, so we rotate the pyramid.
25:45Yeah, and a little blue bug thing drops out.
25:48A scarab beetle, sure.
25:50Yeah.
25:51What do we do next, then, John Boy?
25:52Then you put the beetle in the alligator's eye socket.
25:54It's a crocodile.
25:55It would be a crocodile in Egypt.
25:56Sorry, why do we need to know all this before going in?
25:58Hang on, please, John Boy.
25:59Because we only have 15 minutes to complete it
26:01and we really want to win that medal.
26:03Right, yeah, the medal, obviously.
26:04Can we not just rebook it and do it again properly?
26:06No, no, no.
26:07This is much better.
26:08Let's get it over with.
26:09We want an escaping-from-places role anyway.
26:11Yeah!
26:12Yeah, sorry to be a buzzkill,
26:13but I'm wondering if I should go to the hospital after all,
26:15just pits-wise.
26:16You'll be fine.
26:17Carry on, big boy.
26:18John Boy.
26:19John Boy.
26:20So there's this viper, which is like a padlock.
26:22Go on.
26:23So you turn his body so the pattern matches.
26:25They're crusting over, I think.
26:26Crusting.
26:27Yeah.
26:28And unlock the ancient, you know, safe.
26:30I think we'll be all right, actually, John Boy.
26:32Eh? What do you mean?
26:33Oh, yeah?
26:34Ah.
26:35Has she escaped?
26:36Where have you lot been?
26:38I did it in record time, look.
26:41Ha, ha, ha, ha.
26:42Oh.
26:43Oh.
26:44Huh.
26:46So what do we do then?
26:48Um, I suppose...
26:52Lego Eiffel Tower.
26:54Yeah!
26:55Let's do it!
26:56Hell yeah, bub.
26:58I'm down for some Lego.
26:59Not you, John Boy.
27:00Oh, oh.
27:01I'm trapped.
27:02Like a fool, I'm in a cave.
27:04I can't get out.
27:05You say I'm trapped.
27:06Can't you see I'm so confused?
27:08I can't get out.
27:09You say I'm trapped.
27:10Like a fool, I'm in a cave.
27:12I can't get out.
27:13You say I'm trapped.
27:14I'm trapped.
27:15Can't you see I'm so confused?
27:16I can't get out.
27:17I can't get out.
27:18Oh, oh, oh, oh.
27:26Can't you see I'm so trapped?
27:28And I don't know what to do.
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