- 7/17/2025
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00You know, looking back at 2013, it really seems like that's when everything cool was happening.
00:05We had such iconic things like Iron Man 3,
00:08What kind of crappy suit is this?
00:09GTA 5, and how could I forget the Smurfs 2?
00:132013?
00:15But that's when DreamWorks was really in a creative boom.
00:18They would release banger after banger after this thing,
00:21and yet so many of them would flop at the box office,
00:24almost sending them into complete bankruptcy.
00:26However, there was a film that was a critical, financial, and historical success.
00:30It was Grug. It was the movie with Grug in it.
00:32He's loose!
00:35Food.
00:36Release the Croods!
00:39The Croods has really stood the test of time and become one of the most iconic films in their entire legacy.
00:44But how much of that was genuine, and how much of it was people who thought Thunk looked funny?
00:51Will the Croods be remembered for the next hundred years,
00:53or are we just stuck with Trolls' Boss Baby garbage forever?
00:56This one's been a long time coming.
00:58Here's my look at the Croods.
01:00However, before we get into it,
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02:00Thanks again to Fume for sponsoring, and let's get back into thunkin' gruggin' eepin' ugga.
02:04So our film starts out with the Universal logo where Super Nintendo World is.
02:08It's-a me, a Mario.
02:09Now we're in Disney World with the pedals from Coco, I think.
02:12I hope you die very soon.
02:13And we're showing some cave drawings that explain the history of our crude family.
02:17And I really like how Grug looks here.
02:20Bro hasn't even shown up in the flesh, and he's already making me smile.
02:24But we're told they sit in their stinky cave all day because they suck at finding food and drugs over-
02:28It-it caught-it auto-corrected Grug to drugs.
02:31And we're told that they did have neighbors at one point,
02:33but they all died due to, like, Ligma and, like, Sugma and AIDS.
02:37But the crude survived because they followed the rules,
02:39and they only stayed afloat because they fear anything new and innovative like the Pokemon company.
02:43I want a divorce.
02:47What?
02:47They got you!
02:48But then we get the introduction of Hollywood's most iconic,
02:52most beautiful man that has ever graced the Earth.
02:55That, of course, being Grug voiced by Nicolas Cage of Spider-Man Noir in, like, uh, uh,
03:00the movie with the meme of Pedro Pascal.
03:03FAN-TASTIC!
03:04FAN!
03:07Oh, yeah, Willy's Wonderland.
03:08Also, Willy's Wonderland.
03:09But then slowly and surely, the rest of our iconic family guys make it out into the sunlight.
03:12However, our man Thunk refuses to come out because he plays by the rules,
03:16and he demands to hear the signal from Grug to make sure that he's not an imposter.
03:19Hoo-hoo!
03:21Hoo-hoo!
03:22Ain't she gonna show me her hoo-hoos?
03:24Hoo-ah!
03:24And then Thunk comes out and makes Grug die again.
03:27Though he is happy to hear that his mother-in-law is finally...
03:30STILL ALIVE!
03:31But then we get the most hardest action scene of ever, all times,
03:34as Grug wants to see some real caveman action as we get our epic title.
03:39And then we get this beautiful shot, which gets funnier every single time I watch it.
03:43Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
03:44Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
03:45And our team looks out at their current objective, which is breakfast,
03:48since, you know, it rhymes with Grug.
03:50As Grug annihilates the elderly in order to tell Thunk that he's in,
03:53and as he runs over and grabs the Hatchimal with ease,
03:56he gets knocked out, so they call in the big guns.
03:58Release the baby!
04:00Let's go!
04:01And as Pecan Sandy is chasing down the big-looking ostrich thing,
04:04these two little glup-shadows decide to mess everything up.
04:07Also, these things, like, the existence as one of these things would be like,
04:10hell, Jesus Christ.
04:11Here comes Fenma, here comes Fenma.
04:13But when the old lady's down, she calls in Eep for support,
04:16and as she gets attacked, she's got to yeet the egg over to her old man,
04:19and now, like, 27 people are after this damn egg.
04:22Man, these egg prices are getting out of control!
04:24But then they awaken this big, giant, magical beast thing about to gobble them all up,
04:28and the gang all hop onto this giant, like, leopard-elephant-looking thing,
04:32as they all have to destroy their ankles in order to bring it to a screeching halt,
04:35eventually reaching the entrance to their iconic cave as they all go flying into the air,
04:39and Grug comes crashing down back to Earth with successful food in heist hands.
04:43However, after all that, he gives it to Thunk,
04:45and this f***ing idiot just breaks the damn thing!
04:47I'm so mad.
04:49Papa got a brand new thing.
04:50And this means they've all got to suck up the egg's contents one by one,
04:54and as they all leak, they realize they've only got a single little drop for the big man.
04:58Oh, that's all right. I ate last week.
05:00But then Grug realizes that the sun's about to go down,
05:03so they've all got to rush back to their cave for protection.
05:05However, Ugga starts beating a family senseless
05:07because they weren't holding a place in line to pre-order the Switch 2 at Walmart.
05:11But meanwhile, outside, Eep just, like, climbs the whole goddamn thing vertically like a goat.
05:15These climbing skills would have been useful earlier, Emma Stone.
05:22But she gets all sad because the sun goes down,
05:24and she doesn't know if it's going to come back tomorrow.
05:26We on that North Sentinelese mindset grind?
05:29I'm never going to forget when I found this exact image,
05:32and I started losing my mind because I realized that the North Sentinelese
05:35paint themselves to look exactly like the far-from-home upgraded suit.
05:38Guys, million-dollar idea.
05:39We live-stream going over to North Sentinelese
05:42and we set up a big drone show of Galactus,
05:45and we make them think that Galactus is going to destroy the world in real life.
05:53And he's yelling for Eep to get down, but no scopes the thing right in the goddamn eyeball.
05:58Jesus Christ.
05:58And just barely gets Eep indoors before they get turned into Scooby Snacks.
06:02And then yells at her and tells her to never not be afraid of everything.
06:05And she's giving him the silent treatment as Grug takes it all out on Ugga.
06:08And she says,
06:08Hey Grug, why don't you tell us all a story?
06:10So Grug grabs his little bear doll with a slender tubby's face on it,
06:14and starts telling a story of how Mr. Bear was always playing by the rules,
06:17and he was careful.
06:18And most importantly, he was afraid of everything.
06:20However, one day, he got curious like my homie George,
06:23and because of that, he died!
06:25Fighting Spider-Man.
06:26How you like the new new?
06:27I wanna party.
06:29I wanna song.
06:30Having less of fun.
06:32Please take care.
06:33Cause...
06:33And as Grug's Twitter circle gets into a cuddle puddle,
06:38Eep is still being a bitch and won't get down from her stinky ledge,
06:40so Grug just falls to sleep like a sad little boy.
06:43But meanwhile, cut to the dead of night where the wild thing's Pop Mart looking thing
06:46is just like standing outside their cave.
06:48These like, these LeBooBoo Pop Mart things.
06:51LeBooBoo sounds like a, like a fake thing from like a cartoon to parody stuff like this.
06:55That sounds like it's from Phineas and Ferb.
06:57Dude, fuck this.
06:59Get the Teletubbies blind boxes instead.
07:01But there's this magical orange glowing light awakening the Eepster,
07:04and she looks outside to see it all engulfing her cave,
07:07confusing the hell out of her as she tries to locate it within Thunk,
07:10but she sees it all coming from the outside,
07:12so against her Grug's best wishes, she heads on out.
07:14And as she parkours her way through the cavern like Sonic Lost World,
07:17she's able to locate the magic deathlight in this big shadow of a cave person thing on the cave walls and shit,
07:23climbing up everything and seeing these little tiny sparks and little lights everywhere that are magical,
07:27but look out because live-action Seth Rogen's right behind you, isn't he?
07:31But she catches on and performs an RKO to ensure survival,
07:34and as she's about ready to cut a bitch, she sees it's got hands,
07:36and as it takes off its mask, it's revealed to be Ryan Reynolds.
07:39And as the two squabbles, she realizes it can speak unless Hugh Jackman's yelling at it,
07:46and she starts sniffing and poking at him out of curiosity until she sees Belt, iconic character.
07:54Learn about Belt so you know about the DVD combo pack, people.
07:57Also, he gets to bite Eep's toes, it should have been right.
07:59And our two dum-dum pops are squabbling over the right to yield the flame,
08:02but eventually Eep caves and lets him tend to the fire because it's gonna die,
08:05and she's like, you make this, you make more, make more for me.
08:08Well, I'd rather keep it a secret.
08:10I'll kill you!
08:10And as our man's dying, Belt's gotta do some CPR,
08:13but our man finally introduces himself as Guy.
08:15I'm not your guy, buddy.
08:17He's not your buddy, friend.
08:18I'm not your friend, Guy.
08:20But as he tells Eep that the entire world's about to end and the darkest days draw near,
08:23I'm calling it...
08:25The End.
08:26I'm here, reaching far across these new frontiers.
08:32Also, I just want to point out, this scene has like that iconic 2010s dreamworks,
08:37like harsh orange lighting scenes that I'm the only one who ever notices.
08:40That's all.
08:41I don't mean to sound too dramatic, but...
08:42And then SpongeGar tries to get Eep to come with him.
08:44She says that she can't, so he gives her a magic conch in order to call him if they both survive.
08:48And as he leaves, Eep backs into the man himself.
08:51And then she just like, completely admits that she left on her own.
08:54Now she's gonna die at the hands of Grug.
08:56Because, you know, it's strangulation.
08:57It rhymes with Grug.
08:58And as our duo head back to base camp,
09:00she tells the gang that she found something new,
09:02which causes an absolute mass panic.
09:04And then she tells her squad, wait, hold on, I'll call him.
09:06But then the entire gang just destroys her iPhone 6S
09:09to see if 10,000 Grugs will protect an iPhone from a 100-foot drop gizmo slip.
09:13And then she's all pissed off rightfully because that was my private property.
09:17Bitch.
09:18You wanna see dangerous?
09:19Here!
09:21And then Eep just crashes out and the entire world's tummy starts rumbling.
09:27Get to the cave!
09:28Grug, I'm going, I'm going!
09:30They've got a Crisis City Mach Speed sectionist, bitch.
09:32That thunk's carrying a car!
09:34But as Grug sees his family about to be obliterated,
09:36he has no other choice than no-scope thunk.
09:38Kind of a running theme about that nosing.
09:40And Grug takes on the full blast in order to save his family,
09:43sacrificing himself and ending our film.
09:47And after the debris field,
09:49Grug sees his entire estate completely destroyed.
09:51But then Eep crawls up and says,
09:53you guys really need to see this.
09:55That was in the trailer, I think.
09:56You really need to see this.
09:59Nicolas Cage, Ryan Reynolds, Emma Stone.
10:02And the gang look out to see Darth Vader's castle in the ba-
10:06That's just-
10:06That's just Darth Vader's castle.
10:08And as Grok says that they ain't moving nowhere,
10:10he's kind of forced to because the big thing comes back.
10:12Jumping off of the Grug lands and falling into the trees like Avatar 2009.
10:17I'm the only one who gets that reference
10:18because it seems like I'm the only one who gave a crap about the movie that made like $2 billion.
10:22And as Sanity Cheeks rushes over to the bushes and grabs this weird elephant mouse thing,
10:33That's floor s*** right there.
10:35That's three floor s***.
10:36Grug's all peeved out and says that they can't stay in the open for too long
10:39because they're going to get picked off.
10:40However, as the gang try to find a new cave,
10:42they're sent alerts to this big-ass cat thing.
10:44And blah, blah, blah, they just run around and try to find a new cave
10:47and wind up in a monkey field, feel the monkey monkey field.
10:52But they all go away because they see the iconic cat of death looming upon them,
10:56backing our crews into a corner and not even being fazed by Grug's side special.
11:00Wait, I just realized, someone should mod-
11:01Someone should mod Grug into DK Bonanza when that game comes out.
11:05Please, someone do that.
11:06I'm actually begging now.
11:08Please, Jesus Christ, do that.
11:09Hey, yo, Grug, I'm stuck on this level.
11:11I'm DK Jungle Climber.
11:12What do I do?
11:13Climb, climb, climb!
11:14Alright, thanks, bro.
11:15But they all run away using the legs of this giant creature thing,
11:18and they all hop into a brand new cave only to realize-
11:20BOOM!
11:25And as it gets spat out of the blowhole,
11:27like when Spice is out of water.
11:28But as Jake the dog's on the horizon,
11:30he's about to tear him a new one,
11:31believes after becoming scared after the sun goes down,
11:34as all the surrounding animals start going into sleep mode,
11:37all so that these little birds can start rising up,
11:39and they just murder the whale,
11:40and there ain't no afterlife in the crew's world.
11:42But he takes matters into her own hands and calls up her boyfriend,
11:44and like he just so happens to be like 100 feet away,
11:47how very convenient for them.
11:48The crew's writing is too smart for us.
11:50But as he turbo speeds into the battlefield and lights up a flame,
11:54he performs the coolest scripted segment in gaming history,
11:56as all the smelly birds just completely avoid him and we're winning the day.
12:00Oh.
12:01La la la lava.
12:03Ch-ch-ch-ch again.
12:05Steve.
12:05Chaveys.
12:06Chaveys?
12:07Guy, you do not have the right to say that word.
12:09And as we go through the same song and dance again with the fire and all that,
12:11the whole gang congregates around the fire where Grug tries to get everybody in check,
12:15and pure pandemonium sets in in one of the most iconic scenes in animation history.
12:19TRY HIGHER FROM IT IN THE TALL DRIED GRASS!
12:24I WIN!
12:26When all the people on Twitter say animation is cinema, now you know what they're damn talking about.
12:30And as they all become projectiles in the big cobblacorn of death, it all explodes and the results make fireworks.
12:35Somehow, I don't know how this works.
12:37I'm not gonna question how life was 50 billion years ago, I'm sure the team did their research.
12:44No, no, don't eat it, it's new!
12:46Nintendo YouTubers when the f***in' Switch comes out for some reason.
12:50And as they all wake up, Guy tries to make a daring escape but is denied.
12:53And Grugg says to let him go but Eep tries to convince him otherwise,
12:56eventually realizing that they're gonna need his fire.
12:58So he inserts them into an iconic log.
13:00Yeah, well log, cause you know, it rhymes with Grugg.
13:03And Guy pleads with the big man to let them go to the big Vader castle in the distance instead of a cave.
13:09That thing's going in the mammoth meatball machine.
13:12And Gorg says that they should go to that Vader's castle over there.
13:17I'll never live long enough to get there.
13:20Let's do it.
13:21And he convinces the whole gang that they gotta get in the very marketable pose that was on the album cover of the Thing song we'll get to later.
13:27Here, I'm gonna do what I think all these sound like here.
13:30Gah?
13:31Gah?
13:32Gah?
13:33Gah?
13:34Gah?
13:35Gah?
13:36Gah?
13:37Gah?
13:38Gah?
13:39Gah?
13:40Here!
13:41Right here!
13:42All your needs will be met!
13:43I'M HUNGRY!
13:44IN A MINUTE!
13:45I took a five hour energy earlier, it's f***in' paying off man!
13:47If you drank all night, you had enough energy to run around the whole world!
13:49And then they're all going on a magical mystery tour of Oz subbed in the yellow brick road,
14:00and they're arguing back and forth and being insufferable douches to one another,
14:03like your average whatnot reseller when he brings his family to get in line at Walmart at six in the morning
14:07so he can buy up all the Pokemon cards or sell them for a two dollar profit.
14:09I need a good head count, Timmy, it's two per person!
14:12As Grug sees food in the distance, he begins an assault,
14:15as him and Thunk try to steal a big egg from the big ostrich-looking thing, again,
14:19eventually settling on this big scorpion thing instead,
14:22and Guy's like, what about the bird and the egg and all that, I need my PROTEIN!
14:25And Granny's like, I'm still hungry, I need more, I need more food, that's what Boogie said.
14:28So listen, all you singers from me, it's evasion, you better crash the box, and get ready to clean-
14:31And Granny starts eating Thunk again, god damn you!
14:34So Eap's gotta get the stick.
14:36But as this is all going down, Guy tries and fails to escape again,
14:39but he says to Eap if she lets him go, he'll let her hunt.
14:41So the two go and set a trap so they can catch the beast and feast on its young,
14:44so they create a fake puppet and pretend that it's gonna try to hook up with the big bird over here,
14:48however they get pretty sloppy with the puppeteering because they have to upload three god damn videos a week,
14:52and we make two videos a week, some of them are gonna suck!
14:54And the ostrich thing catches on and it tries its damn hardest to end Guy's existence,
14:57and Grug catches him in his iconic log, and as he sees Eap about to be swallowed by the Thanksgiving turkey,
15:02it steps on the trap and now is the Thanksgiving turkey biatch!
15:06We're going back in time to stop the cave from being destroyed!
15:09God shut up!
15:10Sometimes I'll let Grugs burn down my fingertips just to feel something, anything!
15:13But as they all devour every scrumptious atom of the bird's carcass,
15:16Guy's just sitting there scared out of his mind.
15:19Also all the food here is cooked and you cannot convince me that these guys would have waited more than like 10 seconds to eat that bird.
15:24They wanted to eat thunk raw!
15:26But as Buttplug decides to make the entire classroom listen to a story,
15:29it's your average Grug tale where Thing disobeys the rules and dies,
15:33and then Guy says that his stories never end like that,
15:35so they all line up ready to hear a guy tale,
15:37as he tells the story of the little tiger girl who could,
15:40and despite her peers warning, she would always go out to the cliff,
15:42and every day she'd get closer and closer to that magical edge,
15:45and one day she jumped!
15:47And as the gang all thinks that she's dead and the story's over,
15:50Guy tells them that she flew into the forever sun,
15:53or whatever Rocket said in the Guardians 2 trailer,
15:55and that she chased tomorrow's sun that was so bright and a bunch of metaphors and crap,
16:02I don't understand cause I'm a shithead!
16:04Cause you're a shithead!
16:05That's fair.
16:06And as Guy tells the gang that he's gonna go to tomorrow,
16:08Grug's pissed off as per usual cause he's not the center of attention,
16:11as they all get some good ol' night night.
16:13Oh yeah, then Ryan Reynolds almost takes a tumble.
16:16And then they all go to walk again at the sandy shore,
16:18and Ape really wants to get her boyfriend out of his log so she causes a diversion.
16:23Oops.
16:24He's loose!
16:25And Grug decides to step on these little tiny spikes coming out of the sand,
16:28causing a chain reaction where everyone needs to prove themselves to their leader, Grug.
16:32That isn't until he realizes that goddamn Guy's doing it right now,
16:35and Grug's so mad cause he doesn't got shoes that are protecting his feetsies,
16:38and just he's about to grab the log, Guy makes his grand escape,
16:41and nobody can catch him cause that snail is too damn fast.
16:44Maybe if Guy Gagne had the rugged good looks of Grug,
16:47he could've beaten the snail in the Indy 500.
16:49But then he realizes that he can't leave Grug all alone, he needs a mother!
16:53But this means that the log ride is over,
16:55so it forces Grug to throw away his favorite toy into the stratosphere,
16:58and for an act of reciprocity,
17:00he gives epic feetsies to all of our friends,
17:02and as he does some screaming for money,
17:04they ask Guy where he gets all these crazy shark tank ideas from.
17:08I'm calling it a brain.
17:10Ted, I don't have a brain.
17:12Patrick, you've been wearing the same Keemstar underpants for the past three years straight.
17:16What do you call that?
17:17A BALD RE-
17:18However, Grug's still not convinced and says ideas are for weaklings,
17:21but MF's still out here using the cricket wireless mascots that Guy gave him for his feet.
17:25And as they traverse to the next town, they give a bunch of bananas to a bunch of monkeys,
17:29and it's really funny because there's an entire plot point in the second movie,
17:33where it's like how Grug never ate a banana,
17:35and he really wants to eat a banana,
17:37and it causes like the entire end of the movie.
17:39It's like so comical because like they make a such big deal about it in that movie,
17:44and he's holding a goddamn banana in this movie.
17:46I genuinely can't tell if they're just like trying to mess with us like they-
17:49It's right here!
17:51I'm so mad!
17:52No!
17:53No!
17:54You guys know that the Crash and Bernstein set has the SML couch in it?
17:58And then as the gang use some stilts to get over the gorge,
18:00Grug's not doing too hot and almost dies,
18:02and other comical hijinks ensues with Grug losing at everything he tries to do,
18:06with my favorite one being the awesome gif of him going into the water.
18:10Six-year-old Timmy falling into the deep end of the pool looking for the Krusty Krab.
18:14And then as our montage ends,
18:15we find ourselves in this giant labyrinth maze looking place,
18:18and they all need to get handed out shells from their teacher
18:20in case they meet up with a stranger at the Chuck E Cheese field trip,
18:22and Grog Boy is appalled the guy thinks they should split up
18:25because Scrooge stick together, goddammit!
18:27That is until the Earth starts having tummy troubles again,
18:29and they all get shoved into the holes.
18:31No one ever was...
18:34And as Belt deploys his glider, they all got split up among the caverns,
18:37and Thunk's gotta find an exit among all the rumble and ruins.
18:40Guys, I just found this, like, really cool easter egg.
18:42If you, like, trace along, like, all the cracks in, like, the whole labyrinth maze place,
18:46it'll actually spell out CRUDES. Isn't that cool?
18:48As Granny, Ugga, and Sandy all find this beautiful flowery wonderland,
18:52and Thunk finds his new best friend.
18:54Oh, you're my best friend.
18:56And they all go along with their different paths as Grog struggles to make any progress whatsoever,
19:00and as they all have their super fun time, Thunk makes some memories with his best new mate,
19:04but finally, Eve and Guy make it out together and have a wonderful moment like Tarzan.
19:09But it's interrupted by man's best friend.
19:11Also, Ugga gets a new haircut that isn't dog shit, and I mean that, it probably did have actual dog shit in it.
19:16Best mask.
19:17But then she goes back in to find Grug who's throwing a hissy fit, and we see that Thunk named his new pal Douglas,
19:22of course being a reference to Ant-Man 3.
19:24They did a fourth, would you come back?
19:27As long as I could die.
19:28But then Michael Douglas gets his wish.
19:30Good boy, Douglas!
19:31And as Ma and Pa show up, Grug's pissed off because Guy's stealing his family again,
19:35and Ugga dumps him because he's being such a doom and gloom Snyder fan who won't accept hope,
19:40and he looks up at his family who doesn't give a crap about him anymore because he's being a big donut hole.
19:44You know, you're being a real donut hole, Tails.
19:46I make the Krabby Patty.
19:48And then Guy goes to claim his bride in order to ensure peak dominance and survival of his clan.
19:52That is until we see the end of days over the horizon, dear lord.
19:55We're gonna die!
19:56It's every man for himself!
19:58Help me, Leela!
19:59So Guy brings up the entire crew up to the top of the trees just like Tarzan,
20:03and we get the beautiful stars in the galaxy of Super Mario 3D All-Stars.
20:08I beg your pardon, but that looks like the skybox to Starlight Turner.
20:11And then Eep's like, yeah, I'm going with Guy because he knows what's up,
20:14and he can provide for me in a studio apartment in Burbank.
20:17I'd have a heart attack and die!
20:21And as they move forward in the next morning, we see Grug wearing an epic wig.
20:24He got that shitty Puggo haircut going on.
20:26Have you ever been on TV before?
20:28Once, when I took those hostages.
20:30And he's trying to imitate Guy in order to make up his own level of ideas.
20:33A ride rhymes with Grug.
20:35Uh, that doesn't r-
20:36Shut the f- up, you piece of garbage.
20:42And as Gruggo Puggo thinks of a few ideas that don't drive that well with the rest of the family,
20:46they finally made their way over to the promised Mustafar land,
20:49but none of that matters because they gotta get moving quick.
20:52However, after all that, Grug sees a cave and ushers them all inside,
20:55but nobody gives a crap about the Grug angle,
20:57and they're like,
20:58Yeah, we want to go ride to tomorrow with Guy.
20:59And Grug's like,
21:00Come on guys, we're in Dead by Deadline, I know what I'm talking about.
21:04And Eep crashes out to him and she says they'd be dead if they listened to Grug.
21:09Guy.
21:11Liquid cheeseburger.
21:12That's all right here, right now, on Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives.
21:16And as Grug chases after Guy for stealing everything he knows and holds dear,
21:19they done get stuck in a bat of tar.
21:21And as they all have a moment to calm down,
21:23Guy tells Grug that there's no getting out of this one,
21:25as he learns that Guy's family was game-ended in the tar pits many moons ago.
21:29Spoiler alert, they show that in the cold open of the sequel,
21:32and then none of the rest of the movie has anything to do with this one.
21:34And they have a heart-to-heart and all that stuff,
21:36and Belt's just kind of chilling here,
21:37and I don't really know what he's doing, he can leave.
21:39But Grug finally allows the Guy to make an idea to get the hell out of here,
21:42and as they create a puppet of Mr. Tiger,
21:44yeah, I remember him from like 30 minutes ago,
21:46Belt starts making a beat to grab his attention,
21:48and they try their ding-dang hardest to seduce the beast,
21:51and we get the best line ever,
21:52when he goes,
21:53hand me those acting sticks!
21:56And as Grug's masterful, Oscar-worthy,
21:58will-slapping performance draws the beast near,
22:00our gang gets yeeted out of the tar pit,
22:02but now they've got another problem,
22:04but it's okay because the tar pit has grabbed another booty.
22:06But now as the Croods are all back together,
22:08and the Earth forgot to take its Adderall,
22:10they all now need to make it to the end of tomorrow,
22:12something-something-thing James Gunn.
22:14They-they would all just be getting like blinded right now, Jesus.
22:18I'm gonna look through this telescope,
22:19and I'm gonna say hi to the man on this town.
22:21Okay, you do that.
22:22Just let me look through it.
22:23AHHHHH!
22:24ADVERTISER-FRIENDLY!
22:26But the Earth is having massive diarrhea
22:28because God's punishing us all
22:30for creating Pokemon scalpers and Pogo's Pizzeria!
22:35They're just about to make it,
22:36but they get blocked off by the terrain,
22:38and when Ugga wants to leave and find a new cave,
22:40Grug is staring out into the abyss,
22:42and he has to make a choice.
22:43Go back to the cave like they've always known,
22:45or reach out to the new tomorrow.
22:48And as Grug says that they need to follow the damn light,
22:51he says that he has his strength and that they'll be okay.
22:54And Ugga says it's too risky.
22:56They don't know what's over there.
22:57Grug says,
22:58it's a chance.
22:59It's a chance.
23:00So Grug does the noble thing,
23:01and grabs Ryan Reynolds to throw him across the Grand Canyon,
23:04I think,
23:05and belt holds on tight as they get thrown over the gorge
23:07like Bart Simpson,
23:09and Homer Simpson,
23:10and Peter Simpson.
23:11And as our boy made it to the other side,
23:13into the new tomorrow,
23:14Grug's gotta sacrifice himself to throw his whole gang over
23:17to live new lives,
23:18so he eats Thunk over to get him towards safety,
23:20and then Ugga along with Sandy,
23:22followed up by Granny,
23:23and just as he's about to throw Eep,
23:25she says there's so much that she needs to fix with him,
23:27and she doesn't have time,
23:29so Grug invents a new form of love,
23:31called a hug,
23:32since, you know,
23:33it sorta rhymes with Grug.
23:34And as he says that he loves her,
23:36they don't have much time,
23:37and he has to throw her pronto,
23:39and he says to never be afraid,
23:41it's like the beginning,
23:42but it's backwards.
23:43And as they all land safely,
23:44Grug's gotta get to the promised land,
23:46as he scurries away,
23:47and winds up in Avengers Doomsday land,
23:49I think.
23:50Yeah, that s*** looks like Fan Force 6 negative zone.
23:54And he's able to successfully make a fire,
23:56just like Guy told him many years ago.
23:58And as he's all alone,
23:59he does incel behavior,
24:00and draws an entire fake family on his wall.
24:02But Ruh-roh, he's got company.
24:07But as he's about to become a snacky time,
24:09the Jaguar of Death becomes his best friend,
24:11because they're both scared of the dark.
24:12But as Grug's thinking about his predicament,
24:14he hears the magic conch,
24:15meaning that they're all in trouble,
24:17and he's gotta get across that gorge.
24:18And he thinks to himself,
24:19what would Guy do?
24:20What would Guy do?
24:21What would Guy do?
24:22And he thinks,
24:23what would Grug do?
24:24And he says,
24:25I...
24:26have...
24:27an idea!
24:31Eleven-year-old kids when they realized
24:33they could play GameCube games on the Wii the whole time.
24:36So him and his new furry friend go out to alert the death birds from earlier,
24:39going over into the dead whale carcass skeleton rib cage,
24:42and just as they're all about to devour him and his new friend,
24:45they got stuck in the tar,
24:46allowing him and Oomph to fly over to safety.
24:49Just as they're about to get over the gorge,
24:50and he sees Douglas.
24:51Hey, I know that guy!
24:52But he's got no time to spare,
24:54as he sees a bunch of other animals,
24:56and he keeps collecting them like Noah's Ark, I guess.
24:58Grug was in the Bible, right?
24:59And as the explosion's just about to reach him,
25:01he gets blasted on out,
25:02as we see Eep on the other side trying to call out to him,
25:05as the rest of the gang need to break it to her that he's not coming back.
25:08But they all start preaching out with the conch shells,
25:11as they hear something in the distance,
25:13and realize he's doing it!
25:15He's riding the sun!
25:16And as he crashes on down,
25:18he rushes over to see why they're in trouble,
25:20as we get beautiful moment between Eep and Grugkind.
25:23And as everybody's saved,
25:24Thunk's thankful to see that Douglas has been preserved,
25:27and now they have a new cat they can raise like one of their own.
25:30And Eep once again looks out into the horizon
25:32and says that they really need to see this,
25:34as Grug says that they should go there and embrace the new.
25:37And we get one final look at all the crudes wearing their new clothes
25:40to symbolize them growing up I think,
25:42or something,
25:43like they did that at the end of Brave I think.
25:44Beast Jedi!
25:45Also the grand return of the damn home mic problem!
25:48Yes!
25:49We're not exactly cavemen anymore.
25:53And as Eep says that they no longer need to look towards the darkness
25:56and only towards tomorrow,
25:58they know that they never have to be afraid,
26:00because they know that they can look towards tomorrow.
26:02And as they all run off along the sun setting beach one last time,
26:06the KT extension event comes on and destroys the entire dinosaurs and everything again.
26:11And there you go!
26:12There's the crudes!
26:13What an iconic film!
26:15I think you can gather how epic this movie is,
26:17with just how locked in I was for that end part there.
26:20This film is stuffed full of nothing but heart and soul.
26:23It's very clear that they had many ideas when making this film,
26:27and basically all of them got to shine.
26:29The idea of a caveman movie sounds so unmarketable and gross and weird,
26:33but they made it work so damn well.
26:35Somehow all the characters keep saying these big words,
26:38and it doesn't like break the immersion at all,
26:40because you just love them so damn much.
26:43I mean there's really no sore points in this whole thing.
26:45Every character gets a good amount of time to shine,
26:47plus the whole concept of early humans trying to avoid extinction.
26:50It's like Dinosaur, but if anyone actually remembered or cared about Dinosaur.
26:54You know it's bad when they're replacing you with a Lucasfilm property in the Big 25.
26:58And all the characters are just built to work off each other,
27:00and the actors do such a good job.
27:02Ryan Reynolds' snarky comebacks and demeanor just works so perfectly
27:05with the character who's clearly the smartest out of everybody.
27:08Nicolas Cage is perfect and can do no role wrong.
27:11And Emma Stone is funny because she died in The Amazing Spider-Man 2.
27:16I mean the guy who voiced Belt is the guy who created Lilo and Stitch,
27:19the good one.
27:20They know what they're doing here.
27:21Oh yeah, he also like wrote and directed the whole thing,
27:23but that's less important.
27:24The lady who played Ugga was the bad Evelyn lady from Incredibles 2.
27:28Cannot think of a worse downgrade.
27:30Also the guy who did the voice for Sandy is also the voice of Toothless.
27:34I'm no power scaler, but like.
27:36Besides that though, the visuals in this film have aged pretty well I'd say.
27:39For the 12 billionth time.
27:41This film was created before they reached the peak of CG animation
27:44and forced them to either go hyper realistic Pixar garbage or do more stylization.
27:48But they managed to make the most disgusting grimy character models ever
27:52and not making them feel all weird and gross.
27:54I can't really describe it, but there's just something about all these guys that's just not repulsive somehow.
27:59Even though all the realistic dirt and grime isn't like stylized in any way, it's just real.
28:04Why does the model of the teenager with acne peeve me out more than the big sweaty hairy fat man covered in tar?
28:10Moving on from the movie itself.
28:11There is something I need to talk about right now.
28:13I've been holding this off for months now until I made this video.
28:17This is my moment.
28:18There is a commercial.
28:20So I'm not gonna describe what the commercials about.
28:23Let me just play this little old clip for y'all.
28:27I swear to God, I don't even know where to begin.
28:39How am I not making this up?
28:41The crudes, they see a Kia car and they track it down.
28:46They get inside the damn thing.
28:49Only for them to go through a magical interdimensional time portal.
28:54And they play the movies like Owl City theme song.
28:57And we got a bunch of crude shots of them playing around with the car.
29:01And they take a damn picture.
29:04And they just have like a real picture of them in front of the damn car.
29:08What is this picture?
29:10And then they got a bumper sticker of them.
29:13It'd be one thing if they just had like clips of the car.
29:17But they go through the magical time travel portal.
29:20How much of this is canon?
29:22Like what? I don't even know man.
29:24I don't even fucking understand it.
29:25The Jennifer Lopez home music video seems grounded in comparison.
29:30They get in the fucking car.
29:32And they just get, they go through the fucking time travel portal.
29:35Yeah, it'd be one thing if they just shoved the car in.
29:37The time travel portal is sending me into spirals right now.
29:41This image will start wars.
29:43I have a game theory though.
29:44I fully believe that this commercial is canon to this other one.
29:48Where they go and get the McDonald's happy meal for the movie.
29:51And they're just like in real life and they're looking for food.
29:54This is food.
29:56Thank you bootleg Ryan Reynolds.
29:57Jeffy the puppet.
29:58Yo mama's so fat.
30:01Jeffy the puppet.
30:02Kylo Ren.
30:03People's true.
30:06These two things cannot be unrelated.
30:08They have the ability to time travel.
30:10They had to have gone to 2013.
30:12Why didn't they just time travel to after the world ended?
30:14Why didn't they call the grugs disleague?
30:16Are they stupid?
30:17After that insanity though.
30:22I actually did find these neat beta crudes logos on this website.
30:25They're pretty neat all things considered.
30:27I like this one with the little caveman in the center.
30:29That's neat.
30:30Nothing else to say about it really.
30:31Just neat little oddities.
30:32Though this website is kind of funny.
30:34Because it's just like of a graphic design company.
30:36And they've just seemingly worked on like every movie of all time.
30:40Like they made that first poster of Cars 3.
30:42Lanai McQueen just dying dear lord.
30:44They also made Turbo.
30:45Mr. Peabody and Sherman.
30:47Rebel Moon.
30:48Also Ralph breaks the internet.
30:50Perfectly balanced as all things should be.
30:52Also I was scrolling on this website.
30:53Ah!
30:54Boom!
30:55Chicka!
30:56Boom!
30:57Chicka!
30:58We went back in time.
30:59And we showed this movie to like actual caveman.
31:01You think they could relate to like grugs caveman Oonga Boonga struggles?
31:05Or would they probably just start like throwing sticks and rocks at the ground.
31:08And shitting themselves.
31:09Also I want to mention the Croods video game for Wii U.
31:12Very iconic.
31:13And like for some reason this game.
31:14Like sealed in box and still shrink wrapped.
31:16Is worth like 150 bucks.
31:18Like used it's only like 30 bucks.
31:20It's not that bad.
31:21But for some reason when it's sealed it's like.
31:23People bitching about $80 Mario Kart.
31:25When there's a $150 grug experience.
31:28Also there is that TV show.
31:29And I was gonna talk about it.
31:30But I watched it for like 5 minutes.
31:32And it's just.
31:33It's just slop.
31:34I'm sorry.
31:35I don't care.
31:36I think I've always just had like a vendetta against these shows.
31:38Because they're not one to one like the movies.
31:39I was indoctrinated by a young age.
31:41Because Sherman looked like this and not this.
31:43You know what?
31:44Here's a promise.
31:45When I do the Croods 2 video.
31:46Inevitably.
31:47My water fell.
31:48When I do the Croods 2 video.
31:49I will review the.
31:50This.
31:51This episode.
31:52Of the Croods 2.
31:53Hulu show.
31:54That has 8 fucking seas.
31:558 SEASONS.
31:56Instead though I will talk to you about the Fisher Price Croods toy line.
31:59Look at this.
32:00It's not too extensive.
32:01It's just a couple of little simple figures.
32:03With gimmicks I guess.
32:04And they just got some of the characters.
32:05And some play sets.
32:06But the odd thing is that they seemingly only made like one wave of stuff.
32:10Like they made Grug, Guy and Thunk of all people.
32:13And then they just.
32:14They just never made Eep.
32:15You know like the main character of the whole series.
32:17Just nope.
32:18I'm just assuming that these toys didn't sell well.
32:20And they were holding off on Eep for like a big wave too.
32:22They didn't strike while the crude iron was hot.
32:25And these probably went to clearance I guess.
32:26At least we got this beautiful guy figure.
32:28None of you told me there was an official Croods tenor section.
32:32We're looking at this now.
32:33Let me just play some very nice music.
32:35And then I'll just do like a little slideshow of some of my favorites.
32:38How about that?
32:39This sandy plush looks like what sandy and spongebob make after their wedding night.
32:58And there's the end of our Croods journey boys.
33:01My head hurts.
33:05Fucking bitching stupid dollar general would only let me buy two packs of Pokemon cards.
33:10Damn these scalpers.
33:11I've been bitching about the Pokemon scalpers in this video because this week's been pissing me off.
33:15I don't know why.
33:16I think that five hour energy is cooling down because now I'm all tired and shit.
33:19I don't know how much of that exhaustion is mental, physical or both because I was screaming about funk for like 20 minutes.
33:25Wait, oh my god.
33:26I just looked at my email.
33:27I just forgot that the new has been YouTube's figures.
33:29I'm buying these while I'm recording.
33:30Add to cart.
33:31Bow chicka bow wow.
33:33Entering my credit card number.
33:35Do $21 shipping man.
33:37Fucking hell.
33:38I'm gonna go steal the nifty YouTube's like thunk stealing that big ol' egg.
33:42I bought this like Pokemon booster box as an investment earlier today also.
33:45So that was that was funny.
33:47I'm gonna hold on to this thing for like 15 years and that's gonna let me retire and buy all the Croods figures from Fisher Price.
33:53These endings of my videos have just gotten dog shit, man.
33:56I don't even talk about nothing.
33:57Man, I'm hungry as shit, man.
33:59I'm standing on my chair because it'll be quirky and different.
34:02It is kind of funny though because this is kind of like, you know, this is the end.
34:05This is after all the- this is kind of the last like original 2010's Dreamworks movie that's like so iconic.
34:12Except Megamind because everybody's talking about Megamind.
34:14Who cares?
34:15I'm gonna beat my mic with a big ass Hulk Marvel Legends figure now.
34:18If you're still watching this, then um, why- why are you doing that, man?
34:23You know, if you're damaging your brain enough to be still watching this crap, here's a teaser for next video.
34:28You earned it, Chief.
34:29Thanks again to Fume for sponsoring.
34:31Also, once again, thank you to my $15 Ultra Mega Super Chad Supreme Patreon tier, Nataniel Glad Stolafoy the goat.
34:40Subscribe right now or hand me those acting sticks!