- 6/21/2025
يتلقى عامل الخط الساخن للانتحار في وقت متأخر من الليل مكالمة مزعجة من شخص يدعي أنه هو، ويعرف تفاصيل شخصية لا يعرفها إلا هو.
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Transcription by CastingWords
00:00:30I'm still here.
00:01:00And so are you.
00:01:07I'm still here.
00:01:36So, you're not going to tell me your name?
00:01:49Don't make it a big thing, Mom.
00:01:50Well, she invited you to hang out.
00:01:52I know that.
00:01:54Hey.
00:01:55Hey.
00:01:56Hey.
00:01:57Guess who just might have a girlfriend?
00:02:00I heard he's got two of them.
00:02:02I didn't say that.
00:02:04Oh, my gosh.
00:02:04You guys are annoying.
00:02:09Good nap?
00:02:10Yeah.
00:02:11Weird dreams.
00:02:13Still have this headache that won't go away.
00:02:16You think you should call out?
00:02:18No.
00:02:18You know, they're probably short-staffed as it is.
00:02:22Speaking of which, have you seen my ID anywhere?
00:02:25Yeah, this is what happens now that you're only volunteering twice a year.
00:02:29She gave me a hard time to let them look forward.
00:02:31Guilt trip, man.
00:02:32Yeah.
00:02:33Yeah.
00:02:33Yeah.
00:02:33Yeah.
00:02:34Yeah.
00:02:34Yeah.
00:03:02What's he doing tonight?
00:03:04He said he's hanging out at a friend's house down the street.
00:03:08What about you? You still gonna do that work thing?
00:03:10I decided to ditch it and go to my sister's.
00:03:13She's having her annual shindig.
00:03:15It's quite a hike, isn't it?
00:03:17I know. I just feel like I owe her a visit.
00:03:19Check out the invitation she sent.
00:03:22Julia's New Year's eight bonanza.
00:03:25Well, you can't miss that.
00:03:27This came from your brother.
00:03:29I was thinking of putting him on the fridge.
00:03:32Where are those sweaters?
00:03:35I think the sweaters are cute.
00:03:37Dad, did you get the Lakers tickets yet?
00:03:39Oh, shit.
00:03:41No, not yet. I'm still working on it.
00:03:43If you give me your card, I can order them,
00:03:45because they're gonna sell out.
00:03:47No, no, I'm gonna do it.
00:03:49Oh, um, I almost forgot.
00:03:52I had coffee with Matt Chauvin's yesterday.
00:03:55He asked to read your book.
00:03:57It's really not that type of thing, you know?
00:04:00Well, he was thrilled to give you notes,
00:04:02so I-I sent it to him.
00:04:05Is that a problem?
00:04:08No, I mean, look, it's, uh,
00:04:10he's just a big-time fiction writer, you know?
00:04:13And you asked him to read my dumb little memoir.
00:04:15Wow, okay.
00:04:16No more goodwill gestures from me.
00:04:19Oh, okay. Appreciate it.
00:04:21Tracy Hoover was given the letter of a 9-year-old accident
00:04:37You've reached Andrew.
00:04:51Please leave a message and I'll get back to you.
00:04:53Maybe, brother, it's me.
00:04:55Just calling to say Happy New Year.
00:04:57I got those photos you sent.
00:04:59Thanks for those.
00:05:01Um, anyway, give me a call back.
00:05:04Let's catch up.
00:05:07Because I'm at work right now, you cannot just drop this on me last minute, Ty.
00:05:31It's New Year's Eve.
00:05:35Fine.
00:05:37No, I just can't argue about it right now.
00:05:40You know what?
00:05:41I'll figure it out.
00:05:45Steven, hi.
00:05:47How are you?
00:05:48Good.
00:05:48So good to see you.
00:05:49How are you?
00:05:50Ah, you know, same old, same old.
00:05:52Not interrupting, am I?
00:05:53No, that was just my ex-husband dropping the ball again.
00:05:57I actually have to go and get my kids.
00:05:59He got his dates all messed up and now it's impossible to find a sitter.
00:06:03Actually, I think it's just going to be you here most of the night.
00:06:05Cindy's off at 11.
00:06:06Oh, uh, okay.
00:06:08I'm so sorry, Steven.
00:06:09I know it's a lot from one person, but I just...
00:06:11No, no, no, no.
00:06:12It's fine.
00:06:13It's fine.
00:06:13Go be with you kids.
00:06:14It's okay.
00:06:15You're a lifesaver.
00:06:16Come on, you're the hero.
00:06:17I'm the one who sold out and went into private practice.
00:06:20Okay.
00:06:22Well, at least use my desk.
00:06:23I do have the nice chair.
00:06:25All right.
00:06:25Lifeline.
00:06:40Hello?
00:06:43I don't want to talk about myself.
00:06:46Okay.
00:06:47I understand.
00:06:52Hello?
00:06:52Lifeline.
00:07:17Hello?
00:07:17It's, uh, it's okay if you're not ready to talk, but, uh, can I get your name at least?
00:07:31Mary.
00:07:32Mary?
00:07:33Hi, Mary.
00:07:35I'm Steven.
00:07:38I don't really know how this works.
00:07:40Well, it's, uh, really whatever you feel like you need.
00:07:47What made you call in this evening?
00:07:50And there's no right answer to that.
00:07:52I just don't want to feel like this.
00:07:55I want it to be over.
00:07:58Please, don't tell the police where I am.
00:08:02Because they'll...
00:08:03No, no, no.
00:08:05No, no, no, I won't.
00:08:06I promise.
00:08:07This call is anonymous, so you don't have to worry about that, okay?
00:08:12Okay?
00:08:14I'd just like to talk a little bit about how you're feeling.
00:08:17Did, uh, did something happen at home tonight?
00:08:21Maybe a fight with family or, uh...
00:08:23Yeah.
00:08:24Yeah.
00:08:24Yeah?
00:08:26Can you tell me a little bit about that?
00:08:27Um...
00:08:33Um...
00:08:34It doesn't...
00:08:38I had it, it's been all over the place, and no one I know gets it, so...
00:08:44I got these pills.
00:08:47You have the pills with you now?
00:08:51Mm-hmm.
00:08:52They're for sleep and depression, but I figured if I take enough...
00:09:00Well, I'm really hoping you don't do that, Mary.
00:09:02There's no other way.
00:09:03I don't have a choice.
00:09:06Now, why do you say that?
00:09:08What?
00:09:09When you say that you don't feel like you have a choice, what do you mean by that?
00:09:15Mary, can you...
00:09:17Can you tell me where you are right now?
00:09:20Are you at home?
00:09:20No, I'm in Palm Springs.
00:09:23My husband rented a house here for the holidays.
00:09:27But he knows that you've been having a hard time.
00:09:31What?
00:09:32But he knows that you've been...
00:09:35Hurting?
00:09:40Mary?
00:09:41I don't trust him.
00:09:42He's the reason I'm...
00:09:44The reason that you, uh, that you feel like hurting yourself?
00:09:48Yeah, I...
00:09:50He drove us out here because I was having problems.
00:09:56There was a medication change I went through recently, and...
00:10:00I told him I was in therapy, and he got really mad.
00:10:05How come?
00:10:06I don't think I can talk once longer.
00:10:09Why not?
00:10:09Mary, is it because you're worried about your husband finding out?
00:10:16Yeah.
00:10:20Has your husband ever hurt you?
00:10:22Um...
00:10:22No.
00:10:26But I'm afraid of him.
00:10:28It's hard to explain.
00:10:35No, no, I think I understand.
00:10:37Um...
00:10:38But I gotta say, things, um...
00:10:40They sound really tense over there tonight,
00:10:42so I'd like to come up with a safe word or, uh, or phrase
00:10:47in case your husband comes home and we're still talking.
00:10:50What do you mean?
00:10:51What do you...
00:10:52It's just a way for you to let me know
00:10:54that you're feeling unsafe,
00:10:55so it...
00:10:56it doesn't trigger your husband.
00:10:58Can we do that?
00:11:00Okay.
00:11:01Fine, yeah.
00:11:02Okay, great.
00:11:04So the best thing to do is to pick a word or a phrase
00:11:07that's really easy to bring up in a conversation.
00:11:09Like, he's so wonderful or something?
00:11:17Yeah.
00:11:18Yeah, that's great.
00:11:19He's so wonderful works.
00:11:20That's great.
00:11:20And you remember that, right?
00:11:22Just in case?
00:11:23Yeah.
00:11:24Okay.
00:11:25I don't know.
00:11:27It feels really risky.
00:11:30Mary, listen.
00:11:31I just want to do whatever we can to...
00:11:33I should hang up.
00:11:35No, no, no.
00:11:35Mary, Mary.
00:11:36Wait, wait.
00:11:37Are you still there?
00:11:37Mary, if we can get you someplace safe tonight,
00:11:41away from your husband,
00:11:44okay, just until your therapist is available,
00:11:48do you think that you could hold off
00:11:50on maybe taking those pills?
00:11:55I don't know.
00:11:57Maybe.
00:11:58Maybe?
00:11:59Well, can you give me your address?
00:12:00And I just feel better if we got you out of that situation,
00:12:05away from him.
00:12:11578 Flamingo Drive.
00:12:13578 Flamingo Drive.
00:12:14And you said you're in Palm Springs, right?
00:12:17Honestly, I think it'd be easier to just send it.
00:12:21Mary?
00:12:21Mary?
00:12:22It just keeps happening.
00:12:23I know.
00:12:24Listen, I understand.
00:12:25Mary, I understand.
00:12:27Listen.
00:12:29But that would be...
00:12:32That would be a really big mistake
00:12:35and one that you cannot take back.
00:12:37Do you understand that?
00:12:40Mary?
00:12:40Mary?
00:12:43Shit.
00:12:44I don't know.
00:13:14Lifeline, how can I help you today?
00:13:38Mm-hmm.
00:13:44And give that hot bath a try, okay?
00:13:55Yeah, you too.
00:13:56Lifeline.
00:14:16Sorry, I'm sick.
00:14:21Okay.
00:14:22Well, that's okay, but this line is specifically for mental health purposes, so...
00:14:27So what?
00:14:30Well, if you have a cold, then you should talk to a doctor or someone more qualified than me.
00:14:40No, I mean, I also want to kill myself.
00:14:44Okay, that is something that we should talk about.
00:14:50Can you hold on a second?
00:14:52Sure.
00:14:57Listen, if this is a prank call, I'm going to hang up, okay?
00:15:08Julia, what are you two doing?
00:15:10I'm going to hang up.
00:15:40You all right?
00:15:48Oh, yeah, it's just a little coffee, Brian, thanks.
00:15:51How's your night going?
00:15:52Pretty good.
00:15:53Feels like it's been nonstop.
00:15:55Yeah.
00:15:56I'm going to make a little coffee, you want some?
00:15:59Lifeline.
00:15:59Lifeline.
00:16:19Lifeline.
00:16:20Lifeline.
00:16:21Hi.
00:16:22Hi.
00:16:23Uh, my wife Mary called a little while ago.
00:16:26My name's Jason.
00:16:28Okay.
00:16:29Yeah.
00:16:30Hi.
00:16:32She, uh...
00:16:33You know, well, I'll let her explain.
00:16:35She's right here.
00:16:36hello
00:16:38hi Mary it's Steven
00:16:41um
00:16:44yeah I just wanted to call
00:16:47and say I was sorry about before
00:16:49my meds
00:16:52they just make me think crazy
00:16:54thoughts and
00:16:55Mary is your husband there with you right now
00:17:00uh huh
00:17:03yeah
00:17:04he's so wonderful
00:17:09well thanks for letting me know you're okay
00:17:15and have a good rest of your night
00:17:17yeah
00:17:18happy new year
00:17:19you too
00:17:20Palm Springs Police Department
00:17:32what's your emergency
00:17:33hi my name is Steven Thomas and I'm a hotline responder at the Lifeline call center
00:17:38there's a lady in your area at 578 Flamingo Drive
00:17:42and I believe that there's a possible domestic violence situation with her husband
00:17:47all right let me put you through to an officer on patrol
00:17:51hang on
00:17:52this is the office of Fredericks with the Palm Springs PD
00:18:05you were reporting a domestic violence case
00:18:08yes she's at 578 Flamingo Drive
00:18:11that's the address that's the address dispatched in us
00:18:15is there a number I can reach you at
00:18:16sure
00:18:17my cell is 717-555-6455
00:18:22great
00:18:23I'll give you a call back once we get eyes on her
00:18:26what was the name again
00:18:27Mary I didn't get a last name
00:18:30okay well we're on our way now
00:18:33great I appreciate it
00:18:36very soon
00:18:37T mood
00:18:40well
00:18:42well
00:18:43well
00:19:19Lifeline.
00:19:38I'm going to kill myself.
00:19:41Okay.
00:19:43Can you tell me a little bit about why?
00:19:49That wouldn't make sense.
00:19:53Well, I'd like to try and understand.
00:19:56I'm in no rush.
00:20:02Can you tell me a little bit about yourself?
00:20:06Like what?
00:20:07You, um, you have a job.
00:20:10Are you a student?
00:20:12I go to UCLA.
00:20:14Oh, yeah?
00:20:15I went there.
00:20:17I mean, a while ago, but, um...
00:20:20What's your name?
00:20:23Steven.
00:20:25Steven.
00:20:26That's my name, too.
00:20:28Where are you right now, Steven?
00:20:31In a motel.
00:20:34I bought a gun.
00:20:39I gotta be honest with you, Steven.
00:20:41Um...
00:20:42Guns make me really nervous in this kind of situation.
00:20:48Did you tell anyone else where you are?
00:20:50I...
00:20:51I tried to tell my girlfriend, but...
00:20:56Er...
00:20:57Ex-girlfriend.
00:20:59But we just got into a fight, so...
00:21:02I'm sorry to hear that.
00:21:05What's your girlfriend's name?
00:21:11It's Vivian, but everybody calls her Viv.
00:21:14And you said your name is Steven?
00:21:17Yeah.
00:21:18What's your last name?
00:21:20Thomas.
00:21:23So, uh...
00:21:25You wouldn't happen to have gone to, uh, Woodrow Wilson High School, did you?
00:21:31Yeah, how did you know that?
00:21:34I'm gonna put you on hold for just a second, all right?
00:21:37All right.
00:21:37Hello?
00:21:38Hey, it's me.
00:21:39Dad?
00:21:40Yeah, nice work with that, uh, prank call there.
00:21:42What?
00:21:43That was good.
00:21:44Did you get your mom in on that, too?
00:21:45Dad, I seriously have no idea what you're talking about.
00:21:48But so the guy that called in claiming to be me, you knew nothing about that?
00:21:51No.
00:21:52I'm sorry.
00:21:53I'm sorry.
00:21:54I'm sorry.
00:21:55I'm sorry.
00:21:56I'm sorry.
00:21:57I'm sorry.
00:21:58I'm sorry.
00:21:59I'm sorry.
00:22:00I'm sorry.
00:22:01I'm sorry.
00:22:02I'm sorry.
00:22:03I'm sorry.
00:22:04I'm sorry.
00:22:05I'm sorry.
00:22:06No.
00:22:07Dad, it's really loud here right now, so...
00:22:12Okay.
00:22:13All right, well, we'll talk about this later.
00:22:15Okay, bye.
00:22:24Hey, so, uh, so listen, buddy.
00:22:26You seriously just put me on hold?
00:22:29I came here to blow my brains out, and you're too fucking busy to stay on the floor with me?
00:22:32Okay, okay.
00:22:33Hey, listen, listen, listen.
00:22:34I'm sorry.
00:22:35I'm sorry.
00:22:36That...
00:22:37You're right.
00:22:38That was wrong with me.
00:22:39I apologize.
00:22:41Whatever.
00:22:43It doesn't matter.
00:22:44I...
00:22:45It's happening no matter what, so...
00:22:51When you say it's happening, you mean...
00:22:52I mean I'm going to kill myself.
00:22:55I've already decided.
00:22:56I've already decided.
00:23:00But you haven't done it yet, and that's a great thing.
00:23:02And I told myself midnight.
00:23:06Is there a reason that you gave yourself a time?
00:23:09I don't know.
00:23:10It helps when I have a goal, I guess.
00:23:14Well, you seem pretty determined.
00:23:16Did you get the gun for this purpose?
00:23:20Yeah.
00:23:22It's either I use it on myself or on...
00:23:26On who?
00:23:30It doesn't matter.
00:23:32I'm too much of a coward to do that.
00:23:35He always knew that about me.
00:23:37I only call because I don't want to be alone when I do it.
00:23:42Instead, this hotline was anonymous, so...
00:23:44I figured if I told anyone else, they'd call the cops.
00:23:46Well, that's not going to happen with me, but I got to be honest with you.
00:23:49This, uh...
00:23:51This worries me, Steven.
00:23:53But you're not going to call it though, right?
00:23:55No.
00:23:56Just bring the one fucking siren.
00:23:57No, no. I'm not going to call the cops.
00:23:59I just want to keep talking to you, okay?
00:24:00That's it.
00:24:02Can we do that?
00:24:05Yeah.
00:24:06Okay.
00:24:09As long as you know it won't matter.
00:24:12We can't change what's happening.
00:24:15What specifically do you feel like you can't change?
00:24:20I...
00:24:21I just mean generally.
00:24:22I...
00:24:23I feel like we all believe we're in control.
00:24:26When we aren't.
00:24:28So you feel powerless?
00:24:29I don't feel.
00:24:30I am.
00:24:31I am fucking powerless.
00:24:32That's why I know nothing matters.
00:24:34I know people say that all the time, but it's true.
00:24:38It's like the only thing that's true.
00:24:42That nothing matters?
00:24:44We're all just talking to ourselves.
00:24:46Telling ourselves the same things over and over.
00:24:49Putting meaning into every little.
00:24:51We're pretending to be people we aren't.
00:24:53All of us.
00:24:54Acting like everything's perfect and normal.
00:25:00And what I did...
00:25:02I can't...
00:25:03What did you do?
00:25:04I mean...
00:25:06What did I let happen?
00:25:10Good boy.
00:25:12What did you let happen?
00:25:13What did I let happen?
00:25:15Good boy.
00:25:21What did you let happen?
00:25:22Forget it.
00:25:27Steven.
00:25:29Once I do this, I'll be free.
00:25:33I mean, it's all insane.
00:25:35And if the whole world is insane...
00:25:39Then why is it insane to want to end my life?
00:25:41I think it would be tragic.
00:25:45But insane?
00:25:48I don't know.
00:25:52You see, there's part of me that can understand the feeling that the whole world is rigged against us.
00:25:58Right?
00:25:59And no matter how hard we try, life just keeps putting obstacles in our way.
00:26:02Sometimes worse.
00:26:04Sometimes...
00:26:06Things feel like they're so bad that it is too much for one person to take on.
00:26:13Alone, at least.
00:26:17But that's why you called in.
00:26:20But that's why you called in.
00:26:25And I think that's great.
00:26:32Steven...
00:26:35Are you still with me?
00:26:36No...
00:26:37You still with me?
00:26:38No...
00:26:40No...
00:26:41No...
00:26:43No...
00:26:44No...
00:26:45No...
00:26:47No...
00:26:48No...
00:26:57No...
00:26:58Hi, this is Vivian. Please leave a message.
00:27:13Hey, it's me.
00:27:15Just had a call that threw me for a loop.
00:27:19Give me a call when you get it.
00:27:21I love you.
00:27:28I'm so sorry. I know you're about to head out,
00:27:31but I need to run down to the restroom downstairs.
00:27:33Can you cover for me for just a sec?
00:27:35Yeah, sure.
00:27:43Hello?
00:27:44Hi, it's Officer Fredericks.
00:27:46Oh, yeah.
00:27:47This is my cell. I just wanted to follow up.
00:27:49We arrested the victim's husband you called in about, uh, Jason.
00:27:53Oh, okay. And, uh, and how's Mary?
00:27:56She was worked up, for sure.
00:27:58And we had an ambulance take her to the hospital
00:28:00since her head was injured pretty bad.
00:28:02Oh, my goodness.
00:28:04But, hey, it's great you called.
00:28:07Who knows how bad things could have gotten
00:28:09if we hadn't showed up.
00:28:11Well, thank you.
00:28:13I'll give you a call this week
00:28:14since we'll need a full statement.
00:28:16For sure.
00:28:17This is the best number to reach you at?
00:28:19Uh, yes, it is.
00:28:21Okay. You have a good rest of your night, sir.
00:28:23You, too. Happy New Year.
00:28:25Happy New Year.
00:28:38Hey, there. I'm just gonna use your restroom really quick, alright?
00:28:40Key is on the desk right there.
00:28:44Oh.
00:28:45Oh.
00:28:46Oh.
00:28:47Oh.
00:28:49Oh.
00:28:51Hello.
00:28:56Oh.
00:28:57Oh.
00:28:59Oh.
00:29:04Oh.
00:29:05Oh.
00:29:06You're gonna listen to me!
00:29:32What was that?
00:29:33Damn gunshot victim.
00:29:34Those doctors, there's a hospital nearby?
00:29:37Yeah, next door in the West Tower.
00:29:40Tell you, a bunch of strange happenings going on in this plot.
00:29:43Man.
00:29:46You on eight, right?
00:29:47Yeah.
00:29:48Yeah, you'll probably see me around here later on.
00:29:50Graveyard shit for us, huh?
00:29:52Man, it gets lonely around here on New Year's Eve, I tell you.
00:29:56But...
00:29:58I don't believe this.
00:30:00Is this happening upstairs, too?
00:30:02Yeah, there's something similar.
00:30:04Must have been from that earthquake earlier.
00:30:07We had one?
00:30:08Yeah, you didn't feel it?
00:30:09Must have missed it.
00:30:12Hey, thanks again.
00:30:13Well, no problem.
00:30:14Happy to eat you.
00:30:15You too.
00:30:19Andrew!
00:30:21Hey, man.
00:30:22Sorry, I just got your message.
00:30:23No worries.
00:30:26Yeah, it's crazy.
00:30:26It's almost midnight here.
00:30:28Uh, the boys somehow have more energy than me.
00:30:30Yeah, they look really big in the photos you sent.
00:30:33Yeah.
00:30:34Tell me about it.
00:30:35Hey, I, uh, I was meaning to call you earlier this week.
00:30:39You know, it's just, it's been a little...
00:30:41No, no, no.
00:30:42I get it.
00:30:43I get it.
00:30:44It's weird.
00:30:45Uh, I've been thinking about Mom and Dad recently.
00:30:50And, uh, I don't know, it's, uh, it's like memories of them.
00:30:56They're fading, you know?
00:30:57Like, I can only remember them in bits and pieces now.
00:31:03Sorry, I, I don't know what I'm trying to say.
00:31:05No, I, I get it.
00:31:06It's the same for me.
00:31:07You know, it feels like it's easier to block things out most of the time.
00:31:12You know, I've been thinking about it, too.
00:31:15I mean, how can we not on a night like tonight, you know?
00:31:18You remember that time when Dad took Mom on that trip and left us alone for the weekend?
00:31:24And didn't tell us where they were going or anything and they just left?
00:31:28Yeah.
00:31:30Yeah, I remember that.
00:31:44You said something to me.
00:31:46I've never forgotten.
00:31:50What if he kills her?
00:31:54I don't know, but he came back a few days later.
00:31:56She was okay, but it ended with me going so far away for college.
00:32:04We'd never talked about it, but I could have done more.
00:32:10I know that.
00:32:13Hey, Steve, hang on one sec.
00:32:15Honey?
00:32:18Boys, I'm, I'm sorry.
00:32:21We're closing in on midnight here.
00:32:23Yeah, no, I, uh, I gotta run, too.
00:32:26I'm at work, so...
00:32:27Hey, but, uh, let's find a time to talk more, you know?
00:32:31When I'm not being used as a jungle gym.
00:32:35Yeah, for sure.
00:32:37I've been here with an internet for the last four years,
00:32:40when I come home...
00:32:40I'm gonna go get the darker way in the air.
00:32:42Okay.
00:32:43Especially now.
00:32:44I will never help for a time to come out this evening.
00:32:46And it's that I'll certainly stop maybe!
00:32:51Welcome to my family garden.
00:32:53Is that even my family garden?
00:32:55Oh, well, never!
00:32:56I have a pretty good friend from him.
00:32:58I know that there are no others.
00:33:00I know that there are no others.
00:33:02I have no idea what to do.
00:33:04I haven't heard of him.
00:33:06I've heard of him.
00:33:08I've heard of him.
00:33:10I've heard of him.
00:33:12I've heard of him.
00:33:14I've heard of him.
00:33:16Hello.
00:33:18Stephen, hi.
00:33:20It's a magic machine.
00:33:22Hello.
00:33:24Stephen, hi.
00:33:26chauvin's a colleague of your wife's yeah hi how are you i'm good i'm good i'm good yourself
00:33:34i'm great um funny i'm actually looking at your wikipedia page
00:33:39no kidding yeah i uh i heard that vivian sent my uh draft to you so sorry i just didn't expect
00:33:50to hear from you so soon well good writers seek out other good writers whenever they can
00:33:55hey you're the professional i'm just a wannabe now please don't sell yourself short well i uh
00:34:02i'll admit by the end of college i was dead set on either being a psychologist or a sci-fi
00:34:07writer so you know oh yeah yeah yeah it's gonna be one or the other
00:34:12hello uh sorry did you uh did you feel that earthquake no no it must have not hit us here in the valley
00:34:33are you all right uh yeah yeah all good good so i know it's new year's eve i hope i'm not interrupting
00:34:47no not at the moment well i had to call because honestly i'm reading this memoir and i'm on the
00:34:55edge of my seat i could have put it down really that uh that means a lot yeah no it's gripping stuff
00:35:05i really can't wait to read the rest
00:35:08well i figured it was more or less finished page count wise
00:35:13so i'm just gonna give you my personal opinion you can take it you can leave it but
00:35:19no no please i uh i'd love the feedback well it feels like you stopped short right as things
00:35:27with your father start heating up
00:35:28i trust you
00:35:34but the way you set everything up until this point the father-son dynamic
00:35:41yeah i just figured there was more to explore with that relationship
00:35:46with my father um okay because i i don't think i really got into our relationship until around
00:35:55chapter eight or so
00:35:56huh vivian must have sent me an earlier manuscript this copy ends at chapter five
00:36:03i actually have the latest draft emailed to myself and i can forward that to you
00:36:11right now
00:36:11yeah that'd be great
00:36:14the writing is terrific and your teenage years i mean it's harrowing honestly
00:36:26yeah i just end up sticking to sci-fi and political thrillers maybe i'm too afraid of getting personal
00:36:33man i'm sorry i've got to call you right back
00:36:39oh okay let's uh let's talk later
00:36:43hey viv
00:36:45hey sorry i just got your message
00:36:47it's all right it's no problem
00:36:49have you talked to jeff
00:36:50uh yeah i talked to him about an hour ago he was uh still at the party
00:36:55why
00:36:57he hasn't responded to my text
00:36:59really
00:37:00i mean i know he's just down the street but i've been trying to check in
00:37:03oh hang on i just texted he's saying i'll be home by 12 30 at the latest
00:37:10you're great and how was your party
00:37:13uh i left early i'm actually on the road now
00:37:18that much fun huh
00:37:20no it was fine it was good to see julia she spent at least an hour telling embarrassing stories from when we were young
00:37:25how is everything on your end your voicemail sounded no i think i just wanted to hear your voice
00:37:32you know conversations tonight got me thinking
00:37:37yeah yeah but what
00:37:41us the past
00:37:43oh not the past
00:37:46yeah that little old thing
00:37:51you just think there's uh things i've forgotten you know
00:37:59senior year of college and uh maybe before
00:38:05tell me what you remember about us
00:38:08about us wow
00:38:10yeah
00:38:14yeah from the beginning
00:38:16no i hope you haven't forgotten that much
00:38:20nah i'm just in a reflective moment
00:38:24and i am writing a memoir
00:38:26supposedly anyway
00:38:28yeah that's true
00:38:31so
00:38:32well i mean you first met in a psych class
00:38:36but i don't think we started dating until
00:38:40physics i think
00:38:43we ended up getting partnered together for a final that paper we wrote god why do i always forget the name
00:38:51the mini worlds one
00:38:53yeah yeah that one
00:38:55which by the way i found that stashed at home earlier today
00:38:58you kept that
00:39:00yeah yeah probably just sentimental value i guess
00:39:05yeah i hadn't thought about that till today
00:39:08yeah i don't know why i held on to it i just
00:39:10i just felt like we got through some tough times that year so
00:39:16but yeah that that paper it was way above our heads
00:39:21we were trying to prove that parallel universes existed or or something like that
00:39:26i remember you had doubts
00:39:29yeah that sounds like me
00:39:30i don't know why
00:39:31you got all philosophical that first night working on the take home
00:39:37debating whether life was deterministic
00:39:39you had this relentless belief in free will
00:39:46and that among other things is why i fell in love with you
00:39:50what do you mean by we um we got through tough times that year
00:40:00well you know i mean
00:40:04i don't even want to think about it now but
00:40:05you know what
00:40:10no it's just it's hard to think about how close things came to ending
00:40:15what do you mean ending
00:40:17just us everything the day in the car
00:40:30it was a few weeks after you first told me about the scars
00:40:32when you're back where they really came from
00:40:42go get our room
00:40:51you were so afraid to talk about it back then
00:41:02doctor
00:41:20no crying
00:41:23quiet stephen
00:41:32The number you dialed is not a service.
00:41:51Hello?
00:41:52Jeff?
00:41:55Sorry, man, you got the wrong number.
00:41:57Come on, I know this is Jeff's number.
00:41:59I'm his father.
00:42:02Hey, you've reached Tyler.
00:42:05Leave a message.
00:42:32Just go.
00:42:52Lifeline.
00:43:13It's me again.
00:43:16Steven?
00:43:18Yeah.
00:43:19I'm glad you called back.
00:43:24You still in the motel?
00:43:27Yeah.
00:43:29Do you believe in the afterlife?
00:43:34Well, um, I'm not religious, so in that sense, no.
00:43:41You know, as a kid, the idea of the afterlife scared me.
00:43:47Even reincarnation.
00:43:52What do you think?
00:43:55It's like that Greek myth, Sisyphus.
00:43:57You know that one?
00:43:59Yeah, I do.
00:43:59The guy that pushes the rock up the hill over and over.
00:44:01Sometimes I think that's all life is.
00:44:07These endless cycles of pain that we all just accept.
00:44:11I wanted to know that when we die, that it's just over.
00:44:14Just blackness, no more consciousness, no more pain.
00:44:19Is that something you find comforting?
00:44:25Finality.
00:44:25Yeah.
00:44:28I hate the idea that there could be two possible outcomes.
00:44:34Death just feels like it should be so definitive.
00:44:38Like it's the one thing you can't cheat.
00:44:42Well, I told you I don't think it's an insane thought to contemplate death or even think about taking your own life.
00:44:48But I think with what you have going on, Stephen, that this is...
00:44:55Stop.
00:44:57Stop what?
00:44:58Just get it through your fucking head that you're not going to talk me down.
00:45:02I'm not calling you to be fucking saved.
00:45:06You should treat this like it's already happened.
00:45:10What's already happened?
00:45:11Yeah, because there's no stopping it.
00:45:13I'm killing myself at midnight, like I said.
00:45:18But I agree, obviously, that it's not insane to think about it.
00:45:26It's insane if you don't think about killing yourself.
00:45:30Honestly, I think everyone, every person on Earth is just doing therapy with themselves constantly.
00:45:38I mean, one part of our brain telling another part not to kill ourselves.
00:45:43That there's some reason to keep...
00:45:48That's an interesting way of looking at life.
00:45:52Maybe a little cynical, but I think it makes sense.
00:45:54I don't know.
00:45:55It's so weird that I'm even telling you this.
00:45:58What, calling in tonight?
00:46:01Yeah.
00:46:01I've always hated talking about myself to other people, especially when I'm in a bad place.
00:46:09Well, I'm happy that you did, because I'm a big believer in talking things out.
00:46:14I think it helps.
00:46:17You know, when I was younger, I think I was a lot like you, and I didn't talk about anything.
00:46:20You know, my first girlfriend in college, I never told her anything personal.
00:46:28I was never vulnerable.
00:46:31If you can't talk to me, then...
00:46:33Then I can't do this anymore.
00:46:37Then go.
00:46:40Steven.
00:46:41Just go.
00:46:44You know, I've taken a few psych classes, so you don't have to bullshit me.
00:46:48I'm not.
00:46:49Yeah, you just ran a bond with me.
00:46:51I know how it works.
00:46:53Well, I'm sorry it came across that way, but I do believe I can relate to what you're saying.
00:47:00How do you do it?
00:47:02Do what?
00:47:05I don't know, stay optimistic while taking calls from people like me.
00:47:11I mean, when you go home, what?
00:47:12You just shut it off and forget about it?
00:47:16I wish it were that easy.
00:47:18So what?
00:47:18You get high or something?
00:47:21No.
00:47:26Well, I have been known to finish off a bottle of wine when I get home from time to time.
00:47:31But, um...
00:47:32I'm lucky to have people in my life I can rely on.
00:47:41Yeah.
00:47:43That's the thing about luck.
00:47:44No one wants to talk about it.
00:47:47You really feel like you don't have anyone you can rely on?
00:47:51You're not after what you've done to me.
00:47:57After what you've done to me.
00:48:04Your father?
00:48:05You're a girlfriend.
00:48:06Tell me more about her.
00:48:08Vivian.
00:48:09Vivian.
00:48:09You never ever...
00:48:09I'm sorry.
00:48:10I'll listen.
00:48:11No.
00:48:12No.
00:48:13No.
00:48:14No.
00:48:15No.
00:48:16No.
00:48:17No.
00:48:18No.
00:48:19No.
00:48:20No.
00:48:21No.
00:48:22No.
00:48:23No.
00:48:24No.
00:48:25No.
00:48:27No.
00:48:29No.
00:48:30No.
00:48:31Tell me more about her.
00:48:35Vivian's her name, you said right?
00:48:39Yeah.
00:48:44We've been dating since we were sophomores, so a couple years.
00:48:49I always thought she was out of my league.
00:48:53Don't surprise me, she asked me out.
00:48:57I know you said that you guys had a fight.
00:49:02But she seems like someone you've confided in before.
00:49:06Or trusted.
00:49:08I-I-I told you, I...
00:49:12I can't trust anyone.
00:49:17Not after what he's done to me.
00:49:31Are you a father?
00:49:41I am, yeah.
00:49:43I am, yeah.
00:49:48You seem like you'd be a good one.
00:49:54I feel like that's rare.
00:49:57Can we talk about your dad for a minute?
00:50:06Cause he seems like a...
00:50:08pretty hard guy to have for a parent.
00:50:10You-you could say that.
00:50:18Did he abuse you?
00:50:21Yeah.
00:50:22Yeah.
00:50:27But he always disguised his love.
00:50:33He's always with me.
00:50:35His voice.
00:50:37I-I-I hear it.
00:50:42Even now.
00:50:44I feel him hovering over me all the time.
00:50:47Like...
00:50:49One day he's telling me how proud he is of me.
00:50:52Then what?
00:51:02Fuck it.
00:51:04Doesn't matter.
00:51:05No, it does.
00:51:06It does matter.
00:51:07What were you gonna say?
00:51:09Nothing.
00:51:11Steven.
00:51:15Steven, can we push back this deadline that you've set?
00:51:18Can we do that?
00:51:22No.
00:51:24I can't...
00:51:25I can't just let him eat away at me a little by little...
00:51:28Then let's talk about that a little bit more.
00:51:29No, I...
00:51:31I can't fucking think straight.
00:51:33I just...
00:51:34I just want you to fucking talk about something else, okay?
00:51:35All right, then...
00:51:36All right, I'm sorry.
00:51:37Then let's talk about something else.
00:51:38We can talk about whatever you want.
00:51:40Okay?
00:51:43But there's one thing that I need to know, Steven.
00:51:49Do you have the gun in your hand right now?
00:51:51What are you doing right now?
00:51:52No...
00:52:16This is Officer Frederick.
00:52:17Hey, Steven, I know that you're all alone in a motel and you're sounding really depressed
00:52:26And you told me that you have a gun
00:52:33I know that you're in the red palm motel. I didn't tell you that
00:52:38Yes, you did you
00:52:40Told me that you told me where you I just forgot the room. No, I just forgot the room. Just tell me the room
00:52:45I didn't tell you my room number either
00:52:48Steven, I don't want you to die. Can you just tell me where you are, please?
00:52:54Just so I know
00:52:58It's room 15 all right
00:53:08But I told you if you call the cops I know I know if you hear any sirens you're gonna kill yourself
00:53:13And I don't want that Steven
00:53:18But I was thinking
00:53:21What if I came
00:53:24Not the cops just me
00:53:26It'll take me a little bit to drive out there, but I can be there
00:53:29No, no, no, there's no time just stop, okay?
00:53:32Okay, okay, then just it's important for me to know where you are
00:53:37Okay, and I'm just confirming you said the red palm motel room 15, correct?
00:53:41What the fuck? Why did you keep asking when I said it doesn't matter?
00:53:44I'm sorry, you're right. I won't ask again, okay?
00:53:46Okay
00:54:05Tell me a story
00:54:06A story
00:54:11A story
00:54:15One from when you were a kid
00:54:19That's the only good memory I have of my dad
00:54:23He'd read to me when I was little
00:54:27He really enjoyed that for some reason
00:54:34Steven
00:54:34Hey, Steven
00:54:38I have to do it. I'm sorry
00:54:41No, no, hold on
00:54:42Hold on. I know it's really hard right now, but I need you to stick with me for just a little longer, okay?
00:54:48Because I really think that I fully understand what you're going through
00:54:50You couldn't
00:54:51You couldn't
00:54:52No, I do
00:54:53Oh
00:54:53No
00:54:54I do
00:54:59Your father
00:55:00I know
00:55:02I know
00:55:05I know everything
00:55:08Your mother, I know her too
00:55:11What?
00:55:11I know what happened to her and how you blame yourself
00:55:24I don't, how do you
00:55:25I just know Steven
00:55:31No, you can't
00:55:32You can't know him that's he
00:55:36He covered it up and he forced you to lie
00:55:38I'm going to have to tell the police what happened
00:55:48I trust you
00:55:50And then when she was gone and your brother went away to college
00:55:53He turned to you
00:55:58He started hurting you
00:56:00He made you powerless, but you're not Steven
00:56:02Yes, I am
00:56:04I told you we all are
00:56:05It's not your fault
00:56:06You did everything you could to protect your mom
00:56:09Especially for being a kid
00:56:10And everything your father did to you
00:56:26I know the effects it had on you
00:56:33We can protect you from him
00:56:38We can fix this without
00:56:41You don't have to do this Steven
00:56:43How do you know all this about me?
00:56:45I know it's strange
00:56:47I know it's strange
00:56:49But I'm here to tell you there's hope
00:56:51And no matter how bad you're feeling right now
00:56:52Those feelings they're survivable
00:56:55And I know that because I've seen it Steven
00:56:58I've seen it
00:57:02I can't
00:57:04I can't
00:57:06Yeah you can't
00:57:06I'm sorry
00:57:08No
00:57:09Just stay with me
00:57:10It's easy
00:57:10Just stay
00:57:15Steven are you here?
00:57:20I have to
00:57:22No you don't
00:57:22I'm sorry
00:57:23Because you have a future
00:57:25I promise you
00:57:26I promise you that there's a future with people who love you
00:57:30I promise you Steven these people are going to
00:57:31Shoot
00:57:32No!
00:57:33So
00:57:33I've heard you
00:57:34Best
00:58:01Hello?
00:58:05Hi, yeah.
00:58:07Hey, just wanted to stay on the line to confirm.
00:58:10You've got a potential suicide victim at the Red Palm,
00:58:12is what it sounded like.
00:58:14Room 15, right?
00:58:16Yes, room 15, but hurry.
00:58:18I think it's...
00:58:19I'm already on my way.
00:58:21I'm only a minute out, so I'll call you back.
00:58:31What?
00:59:01Hello.
00:59:06Yeah, hi.
00:59:07So, nothing here at the Red Palm.
00:59:10Actually, the hotel manager says no one's checked in at all tonight.
00:59:14What?
00:59:15But, uh, sort of a weird thing.
00:59:17I found a bullet hole in the wall of the bathroom in room 15.
00:59:22You did?
00:59:23Yeah, I mean, I can't tell if that's what it is for sure or how recent it is, but it looks old.
00:59:29I had to guess.
00:59:31Um, well, uh, thank you for your help.
00:59:36I guess I don't...
00:59:43Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
00:59:52Okay.
00:59:54Hey!
01:00:24Hey!
01:00:45Hello?
01:00:52Hello?
01:00:54Hey!
01:00:55You're not authorized to be on this floor, are you?
01:00:56No, I, uh...
01:00:57Come on, man, I like you.
01:00:58I don't want to have to report you.
01:00:59Hey!
01:01:00Hey!
01:01:01Hey!
01:01:02Hey!
01:01:03Hey!
01:01:04Hey!
01:01:05Hey!
01:01:06Hey!
01:01:07Hey!
01:01:08Hey!
01:01:09Hey!
01:01:10Hey!
01:01:11Hey!
01:01:12Hey!
01:01:13Hey!
01:01:14Hey!
01:01:15Hey!
01:01:16Hey!
01:01:17Hey!
01:01:18Hey!
01:01:19Hey!
01:01:20Hey!
01:01:21Hey!
01:01:22Hey!
01:01:23Hey!
01:01:24Hey!
01:01:25Hey!
01:01:26Hey!
01:01:27Hey!
01:01:28Hey!
01:01:29Hey!
01:01:30Hey!
01:01:31Hey!
01:01:32Hey!
01:01:33Hey!
01:01:34Hey!
01:01:35Hey!
01:01:36Hey!
01:01:37Hey!
01:01:38Hey!
01:01:39Hey!
01:01:40Hey!
01:01:41Hey!
01:01:42Hey!
01:01:43Dean, right?
01:01:45Yeah.
01:01:47You said there's a hospital in the West Tower.
01:01:49Mm-hmm.
01:01:50What's the name of it?
01:01:53Not a dean.
01:02:13Hello?
01:02:38Hey.
01:02:39Uh, I'm so sorry.
01:02:41I just realized my sister and her friends,
01:02:43they prank called this number earlier tonight,
01:02:46and when I realized it was this...
01:02:48Julia, no.
01:02:49Come on, you said you'd apologize.
01:02:51Julia, I...
01:02:52Wait, wait, your sister's named Julia?
01:02:55Your younger sister?
01:02:56Yeah, she's...
01:02:57Sorry, you know.
01:02:59She's a little young.
01:03:00And you're Vivian?
01:03:03Yeah.
01:03:05How did you know that?
01:03:07It's January 1st, 2009, where you're at, right?
01:03:12Just past midnight.
01:03:13Uh, yeah.
01:03:16I need to tell you something about Stephen Thomas.
01:03:19Do you know Stephen?
01:03:21Yeah, it's a long story, but listen.
01:03:23Right now, I need you to go to, uh...
01:03:27St. Jude's Hospital in Palm Springs, okay?
01:03:30Do you have a car?
01:03:31Uh, yeah, but what's going on?
01:03:37Stephen tried to kill himself tonight.
01:03:40And I don't know if he's gonna make it.
01:03:42Uh, uh...
01:03:43Okay?
01:03:44Okay, okay, I'm, uh, I'm, I'm, I'm going now.
01:03:48Um, wait, are you the person he said he talked to earlier tonight?
01:03:52I don't know, did he, uh...
01:03:54He said he tried calling someone, but that he kept hanging up.
01:03:56He wasn't really making sense, but, um...
01:04:00Anyway, whoever you are, thank you.
01:04:12He tried to call.
01:04:13I don't know.
01:04:34I don't know.
01:05:04I don't know.
01:05:34I don't know.
01:06:04I don't know.
01:06:34I don't know.
01:07:04I don't know.
01:07:34I don't know.
01:07:36I don't know.
01:07:38I don't know.
01:07:40I don't know.
01:07:42I don't know.
01:07:44I don't know.
01:07:46I don't know.
01:07:48I don't know.
01:07:50I don't know.
01:07:52I don't know.
01:07:54I don't know.
01:08:00I don't know.
01:08:08I don't know.
01:08:10I don't know.
01:08:11I don't know.
01:08:12I don't know.
01:08:14I don't know.
01:08:16I don't know.
01:08:20I don't know.
01:08:22thinks he has a girlfriend but he's too shy to talk to me about that stuff and so recently I've
01:08:31only been volunteering a few times a year ever since I went into private practice
01:08:36and I was told that writing a memoir would be a good therapeutic exercise
01:08:42so I'm about five chapters deep in right now
01:08:52so
01:08:57so
01:09:03so
01:09:07so
01:09:09so
01:09:13so
01:09:15so
01:09:19I don't know.
01:09:49Tell me a story.
01:10:19I don't know.
01:10:49I can't take any more of these seizures.
01:10:59Let's induce hypothermia again to reduce the brain swelling.
01:11:06Clear.
01:11:07Knock, knock.
01:11:12Who's that?
01:11:14Do you ever see a future between us?
01:11:28Steven.
01:11:34Steven, we're good.
01:11:36Just go.
01:11:38I'm alive.
01:11:48I'm alive.
01:11:50Okay, stay with us, Steven.
01:11:54Steven.
01:11:55We're open now.
01:11:56Who?
01:11:57I'm alive.
01:11:58I'm alive.
01:12:00I'm alive.
01:12:02I'm alive.
01:12:04I'm alive.
01:12:12I'm alive.
01:12:14I'm alive.
01:12:15I'm alive.
01:12:16I'm alive.
01:12:17I'm alive.
01:12:18I'm alive.
01:12:20I'm alive.
01:12:22I'm alive.
01:12:24I'm alive.
01:12:26I'm alive.
01:12:28I'm alive.
01:12:29You know his odds aren't good.
01:12:30And even if he does make it.
01:12:32You know, his odds aren't good.
01:12:42And even if he does make it.
01:12:51I, I can't stand to see him like this.
01:12:54I need to go on a walk.
01:12:56Andrew.
01:12:57I'm sorry.
01:13:02Hi, Mary.
01:13:28How you doing?
01:13:29Okay, I guess.
01:13:31So your concussion symptoms were pretty mild,
01:13:33but we're still going to want to keep you overnight, okay?
01:13:36Also, there's a detective here that would like to speak with you.
01:13:47Mary, hi.
01:13:49I'm Detective Fredericks with the Palm Springs Police.
01:13:52I'd like to get more background about your husband, Jason.
01:13:55Yeah, that's fine.
01:14:00Thanks.
01:14:01Hey, Loretta.
01:14:04Hello?
01:14:05Dr. Williams.
01:14:06No, I, I can't.
01:14:07I can't get a sitter that fast.
01:14:08Dr. Williams, I'm sorry.
01:14:09It's really urgent.
01:14:09Come on, you're just not telling me this.
01:14:12I just have to show you one thing.
01:14:13I gotta call you back.
01:14:14Be really quick.
01:14:15Great.
01:14:15So, patient.
01:14:17It's just this one.
01:14:18Yeah.
01:14:19I'll see you.
01:14:19I'm just laughing.
01:14:20I'm sorry.
01:14:20I'm sorry.
01:14:21I'm sorry.
01:14:22I'm sorry.
01:14:22Oh, no, no, no, no.
01:14:52Oh, no, no, no.
01:15:22They told me it's not likely you'll wake up, but I don't believe it.
01:15:35I know you.
01:15:36And when you do, we're going to talk more, okay?
01:15:42We're not going to hide things.
01:15:44I'm scared, though, Stephen.
01:15:52But I'm still here, and so are you.
01:15:56I'm still here, and so are you.
01:16:26I'm still here, and so are you.
01:16:56I'm still here, and so are you.
01:17:26I'm still here, and so are you.
01:17:56I'm still here, and so are you.
01:18:26I'm still here, and so are you.
01:18:56I'm still here, and so are you.
01:18:58I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:00I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:02I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:04I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:06I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:08I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:10I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:12I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:14I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:16I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:18I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:20I'm still here, and so are you.
01:19:22I know.
01:19:24I love you.
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