The Cat in the Hat (2003) Full Movie HD

Just Movies

The Cat in the Hat (2003), based on the beloved book by Dr. Seuss, is a colorful and energetic family comedy. When a mischievous talking cat shows up at the home of two bored children, their quiet day turns into a whirlwind of fun, surprises, and silliness. With imaginative settings and playful humor, the film delivers lighthearted entertainment for kids and fans of the original story.  the cat in the hat, 2003 movie, dr seuss, family movie, kids comedy, mike myers, colorful film, fun adventure, children’s book adaptation, playful humor, classic story, family friendly film, imaginative movie, kids entertainment, silly fun

Transcript

00:00:00Musique

00:00:30Musique

00:01:00There are gajillions of stories of mischief and fun,

00:01:18but to keep things simple, let's start with just one.

00:01:22About a mom and two kids and a house and a hat

00:01:27that, oddly enough, was worn by a cat.

00:01:32But soon enough, we'll get to all that.

00:01:36In the valley that stretches from this hill to that hill,

00:01:40a city is nestled.

00:01:42That city is anvil.

00:01:46Any more duty-fruity?

00:01:48It's a town that's not huge,

00:01:51but quite big enough

00:01:53for buyers and sellers to sell and buy stuff.

00:01:57From shoes and shirts and elongated bladders

00:02:01to sailboats and gibble-grated berry-juice bladders.

00:02:07So our story begins at the corner of Maine and Montreux

00:02:12in the spotless real estate office run by Hank Humberflube.

00:02:19Humberflube Real Estate, how can we make your dreams come true?

00:02:22What do you mean you're leaving?

00:02:31You're a babysitter.

00:02:32Babysitters don't leave.

00:02:33They sit.

00:02:34Baby leavers leave.

00:02:36I'm sorry.

00:02:36I really got to go, Ms. Wong.

00:02:37Well, I need to come home right away.

00:02:40Oh, my God.

00:02:40All right.

00:02:41Thank you, Amy.

00:02:42Sorry.

00:02:42Attention, everyone.

00:02:48It's 9.02.

00:02:50Staff meeting.

00:02:51Staff meeting.

00:02:52Live, everyone.

00:02:55First, I'd like to welcome aboard

00:02:57our newest member of the Humberflube family,

00:03:00Jim McFlinigan.

00:03:02Mr. Humberflube.

00:03:04I wanted a thank you.

00:03:05Fired.

00:03:06I beg your pardon?

00:03:07Fired.

00:03:09Good day.

00:03:09As you know, tonight is our bi-monthly meet-and-greet party.

00:03:26Tonight's host is Joan Walden.

00:03:30This is where people can meet our real estate agents

00:03:33in an informal yet hygienic setting.

00:03:37Mr. Humberflube, I have to get home to my kids.

00:03:42Ah, yes.

00:03:45Your children.

00:03:48Joan, let me make this perfectly clear.

00:03:52If your house is as messy as last time,

00:03:57you're fired!

00:04:03That's pretty clear, Mr. Humberflube.

00:04:05Don't worry.

00:04:07I promise.

00:04:08My kids will be on their best behavior.

00:04:11Great.

00:04:16Humberflube real estate,

00:04:17how can we make your dreams come true?

00:04:19Please hold.

00:04:20If you leave Humberflubes

00:04:22and turn left onto Main,

00:04:24three miles down,

00:04:26you'll find Lip Lapper Lane.

00:04:28A pleasant enough street in a pleasant enough way,

00:04:32where a neighbor greeted neighbor

00:04:34with a neighborly hey.

00:04:37Hey.

00:04:38Here the hedges were hedged,

00:04:41the weeds were all weeded,

00:04:43and lawns were mowed daily,

00:04:45twice daily if needed.

00:04:47And at the end of this street,

00:04:51in a house like any other,

00:04:53something magical would happen

00:04:55to a sister and her brother.

00:04:58Ah!

00:04:59Ah!

00:05:00Ah!

00:05:01Ah!

00:05:07Ah!

00:05:08Shh!

00:05:08Nevin, stealth mode.

00:05:11Today's to-do list.

00:05:12Number one,

00:05:13make to-do list.

00:05:15Number two,

00:05:16practice coloring.

00:05:17Number three,

00:05:18research graduate schools.

00:05:20Number four,

00:05:21be spontaneous.

00:05:23Number five,

00:05:24create lasting childhood memories.

00:05:26And number six,

00:05:27bend will.

00:05:31What is he doing?

00:05:33Ow!

00:05:34Ow!

00:05:34Number five,

00:05:35make tomorrow's to-do list.

00:05:43Ooh!

00:05:44Ooh!

00:05:45Ooh!

00:05:46Ooh!

00:05:47Ooh!

00:05:51Number 10,

00:05:52make tomorrow's to-do list.

00:05:58Ladies and gentlemen,

00:06:00Nevins,

00:06:01your attention, please.

00:06:02You are about to witness

00:06:04the third most spectacular stunt

00:06:05ever performed

00:06:06under this roof!

00:06:08Do you know how hard

00:06:09it's getting to tell people

00:06:10that we're related?

00:06:12Relax.

00:06:13I'll put everything back.

00:06:17Ah!

00:06:24Enough!

00:06:25I'm indoor stair-luge!

00:06:28Indoor stair-luge?

00:06:30I'll have to add this one to my list.

00:06:32Go have no fun.

00:06:34Somewhere else!

00:06:36Eh.

00:06:37Go dive!

00:06:55Madden?

00:06:56Madden!

00:06:56Come back!

00:06:57Hey, Mom. What's up?

00:07:05You are so lucky you didn't ruin this dress.

00:07:09Mom, I know you're angry, but there's something you need to know.

00:07:13This was all Sally's fault.

00:07:15Oh, really? And how exactly was it Sally's fault?

00:07:18Uh, give me a minute. I'm working on it.

00:07:20Save it, Conrad.

00:07:22Why today?

00:07:24How did you have to pick today to destroy the house?

00:07:26You know what's happening today.

00:07:28I tried to tell him, Mom.

00:07:30Mom's throwing a very important party, I said.

00:07:32All of her important clients will be here.

00:07:34But he went right ahead and wrecked the house and let Nevins get away.

00:07:38Now, again, I hope you're going to ground him.

00:07:41Yes, Sally, for a week. But that's none of your business.

00:07:44A week? Come on, two days.

00:07:46I asked you to do one thing today, Conrad.

00:07:48Keep the house clean.

00:07:50Do you know how frustrating it is that you're always doing the exact opposite of what I say?

00:07:55Knock, knock, knock.

00:07:57Did someone lose a dog?

00:08:00I found him next door in my yard. Again.

00:08:04You are a saint.

00:08:06And here I thought you were only dating me for my good looks.

00:08:09Lucky us. Larry Quinn is here.

00:08:12Hey, a sport.

00:08:13Call me Lawrence, okay?

00:08:15You rescued Nevins.

00:08:17Thanks, Lawrence.

00:08:18It was my pleasure, Sally. Anything for my little princess?

00:08:21Oh, I don't want to be a princess. In a constitutional monarchy, Parliament has all the real power.

00:08:28I see. Okay, that's great.

00:08:30Uh, look, pal, be a sport, and why don't you go and, uh, tidy up the living room, okay?

00:08:35Dude!

00:08:36I don't have to listen to you, Larry.

00:08:38Conrad, do what Lawrence says.

00:08:40Have you given some thought about the Wilhelm Academy?

00:08:57You mean the Colonel Wilhelm Military Academy for Troubled Youth?

00:09:01That's the one, Joan.

00:09:03I'm not sure it's right for Conrad.

00:09:07Oh, Joan. Joan.

00:09:09Joan. Joan, Joan, Joan.

00:09:13I have so much respect for you, Joan.

00:09:16Single mother, career woman, raising two children on your own,

00:09:20and still finding time to be the best darn real estate agent in town.

00:09:26I know how hard it is, Joan.

00:09:29It is hard.

00:09:30Oh, I know.

00:09:33And I know how hard you're trying.

00:09:35This is a once-in-a-lifetime proposition, and you must act now.

00:09:40The Colonel Wilhelm Military Academy for Troubled Youth

00:09:43is what we call in the sales game a win-win scenario.

00:09:46A top-flight military school, and it's only eight hours away.

00:09:50Oh, the phone.

00:09:55I heard what you said.

00:10:06I'm not going to military school, Larry.

00:10:08Look, buddy.

00:10:10I know I'm not your dad.

00:10:13This is probably really strange for you, you know?

00:10:17Your neighbor's dating your mom, but...

00:10:20Here's the thing, son.

00:10:21Come here.

00:10:21I don't like you either.

00:10:25But I'm gonna marry your mom.

00:10:27And if it was up to me, you'd be at military school today.

00:10:32Not going to military school.

00:10:34I think you're gonna love it.

00:10:37It's just like summer camp,

00:10:38except with brutal forced marches and soul-crushing discipline.

00:10:42And one more thing.

00:10:43It's Lawrence, you snot-nosed little son of a wonderful woman

00:10:48who I'm absolutely crazy about.

00:10:50Gosh, I love children.

00:10:52Oh, Joan, I didn't see you there.

00:10:53Lawrence, would you be a doll

00:10:55and help me bring up the extra chairs from the basement?

00:10:57Nothing would give me more pleasure, Joan,

00:10:59but I do have to run.

00:11:00I have a very important sales conference downtown.

00:11:02Oh, okay.

00:11:05Well, I'll see you at the party tonight.

00:11:07Sure.

00:11:13Mom, that guy's a total phony.

00:11:32You can't let Larry.

00:11:33It's Lawrence Conrad.

00:11:37Kate's catering.

00:11:38I'm here to do your party tonight.

00:11:39Oh, hi.

00:11:41Where's Kate?

00:11:42I'm Kate.

00:11:43Oh, okay.

00:11:45Right this way, Kate.

00:11:47Mom, you've got to listen to me.

00:11:49As soon as you went to me.

00:11:50Two weeks ago, you said you could.

00:11:51Ah!

00:11:52Erlo, I spent a little.

00:11:53See?

00:11:54Quiet!

00:11:55No, Ben.

00:11:57I said quiet!

00:12:03Joan Walden Real Estate,

00:12:05be it ever so humble.

00:12:05There's no place like Joan.

00:12:07This is Mr. Humberflube.

00:12:09Oh, hi, Mr. Humberflube.

00:12:11Joan, I need you to come back to the office.

00:12:13Today?

00:12:14Yes, Joan.

00:12:15No problem?

00:12:17No problem at all.

00:12:18Great!

00:12:21What's going on, Mommy?

00:12:24Mommy has to go back to the office.

00:12:26Oh, I hope Mrs. Kwan can babysit.

00:12:29Not Mrs. Kwan!

00:12:30Hi, Mrs. Kwan.

00:12:36Hi.

00:12:37I'm running late.

00:12:38Thanks for babysitting on such short notice.

00:12:41Yeah.

00:12:42Okay, Mrs. Kwan.

00:12:43Oh, oh, oh.

00:12:44I'll be back in a couple of hours.

00:12:47Conrad's grounded, so no video games.

00:12:51Sally, last chance.

00:12:52If you want to make cupcakes,

00:12:54I can take you to your friend Jenny's house.

00:12:56Jenny's not my friend anymore.

00:12:57Last time we made cupcakes,

00:12:59she wanted to be the head chef.

00:13:01I'm the head chef.

00:13:02Well, what about Denise, then?

00:13:04She talked back to me,

00:13:05so I ordered her not to speak to me anymore.

00:13:07And you don't like Bossy?

00:13:09I won't tolerate it.

00:13:10Right.

00:13:12Well, if you're boasting,

00:13:14remember the rules.

00:13:15Conrad, no playing ball in the house,

00:13:17no fighting,

00:13:18no answering the phone,

00:13:19City Morgue.

00:13:20Mommy, can't I have some rules?

00:13:24No chewing tobacco.

00:13:26Thanks, Mom.

00:13:26You have my word.

00:13:28And absolutely no one

00:13:30sets foot in the living room or else.

00:13:33Or else what?

00:13:34You're gonna do what Larry said

00:13:35and send me to military school?

00:13:37Maybe if you just behave,

00:13:38I wouldn't have to consider military school.

00:13:40I wish I could trust you.

00:13:44I wish I had a different mom.

00:13:45Well, sometimes I wish the same thing.

00:14:13Good luck with your meeting.

00:14:15Children, would you like to watch television with me?

00:14:41We don't have to tell your mother.

00:14:43We don't have to tell your mother.

00:14:53Taiwanese parliament.

00:14:55You tell them, Guai Zhang.

00:14:58No more big government.

00:15:00Rip his heart out.

00:15:02Hit me.

00:15:16So they slumped in their chairs,

00:15:22too glum to complain.

00:15:24They sat in the house on that cold, cold, wet day

00:15:36with no fun to have

00:15:38and no games to play.

00:15:40They could just stare out the window

00:15:42or perhaps get a nap in

00:15:44and hope that something,

00:15:46anything might happen.

00:15:48Quit bothering the fish.

00:15:50I know.

00:15:51Quit bothering the fish.

00:15:52Spit hands.

00:15:53Oh, gross.

00:15:54Get that...

00:15:55Oh, wait for me.

00:15:57Get it.

00:15:58Oh, wait.

00:15:59Then something went bump.

00:16:01What was that?

00:16:04How that bump made them jump.

00:16:06I think it came from the closet.

00:16:08I think it came from the closet.

00:16:09Oh.

00:16:36Oh.

00:16:41Conrad?

00:16:44Conrad?

00:16:47Come on, Conrad.

00:16:55Shouldn't scare people.

00:16:56You should have seen the look on your face

00:16:58it was like you saw a monster.

00:17:00A monster?

00:17:01Where?

00:17:02Yeah!

00:17:05That could have gone better.

00:17:14What was that?

00:17:15I don't know.

00:17:16Looked like a humongous cat.

00:17:19Humongous?

00:17:20I prefer the term big bone to jolly.

00:17:22Now, what are we hiding from?

00:17:33That was a giant cat.

00:17:34But that's impossible, isn't it?

00:17:36It's entirely impossible.

00:17:38You know, I like this hiding place a lot better.

00:17:41They'll never find us here.

00:17:45Scream and run.

00:17:48And away they go.

00:17:53Who are you?

00:17:54Who?

00:17:55Me?

00:17:56Why, I'm the cat in the hat.

00:17:58There's no doubt about that.

00:18:00I'm a super fundiferous feline

00:18:03who's here to make sure that you're...

00:18:07Me-line.

00:18:09Key-line.

00:18:11Herpin-pine.

00:18:13Hi.

00:18:15I got nothing.

00:18:16I'm not so good with the rhyming.

00:18:18Not really.

00:18:19No.

00:18:22Look.

00:18:23I'm a cat that can talk.

00:18:24That should be enough for you people.

00:18:25Oh, I don't even know what's going on.

00:18:27I can talk.

00:18:28I'm a cat.

00:18:30Where did you come from?

00:18:34Hmm.

00:18:35How do I put this?

00:18:36When a mommy cat and a daddy cat

00:18:38love each other very much,

00:18:40they decide that...

00:18:41Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:18:43Where did you come from?

00:18:45My place.

00:18:46What do you think?

00:18:49No.

00:18:50How did you get here?

00:18:52I drove.

00:18:53Look, I've been here two whole minutes

00:18:55and no one has offered me a drink.

00:18:57A rope.

00:18:59Sorry, Mr. Cat.

00:19:00Would you like some milk?

00:19:02Milk?

00:19:03No.

00:19:04Lactose intolerant.

00:19:05Gums up the works.

00:19:06Oy.

00:19:08You'll thank me later.

00:19:11Hello.

00:19:12Surf's up.

00:19:13Yeah.

00:19:14Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.

00:19:16Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.

00:19:17Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.

00:19:18Nice spread you got here.

00:19:19Hum-mina, hum-mina, hum-mina, hum-mina.

00:19:20Who is this?

00:19:22Oh.

00:19:24That's my mom.

00:19:25Awkward.

00:19:26Gats.

00:19:27Yes.

00:19:28Yes, this place will do quite nicely, actually.

00:19:29Yeah.

00:19:30Although those drapes are a train wreck.

00:19:34And this is the lumpiest couch I ever sat on.

00:19:37Who is this dreadfully uncomfortable woman?

00:19:38Get off her.

00:19:39That's our babysitter.

00:19:40What the?

00:19:41Babysitter?

00:19:42You don't need one of those, do you?

00:19:43Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

00:19:44Let me get this straight.

00:19:45You pay this woman.

00:19:46You pay this woman.

00:19:47No you don't need one of those.

00:19:48Do you?

00:19:50Oh!

00:19:51Oh!

00:19:52Yes, oh!

00:19:53No.

00:19:54No.

00:19:55No.

00:19:56No.

00:19:57No.

00:19:58No.

00:19:59No.

00:20:00No.

00:20:01No.

00:20:02No.

00:20:03No.

00:20:04No.

00:20:05No.

00:20:06No.

00:20:07No.

00:20:08No.

00:20:09No.

00:20:10No.

00:20:11No.

00:20:12Cette femme, elle s'arrête sur les bébés ?

00:20:15C'est malheureux !

00:20:19Je ne fais pas pour rien !

00:20:25Maintenant, nous voyons voir ce que l'ancienne phénoméne veut dire.

00:20:29Phénoméne ?

00:20:30Oui, il meurtra que vous êtes de l'air.

00:20:42C'est parti !

00:20:50Ah !

00:20:51Control freak !

00:20:52Oui !

00:20:53Maintenant, vous !

00:20:54Commentez-vous !

00:21:12Claire, vous pouvez d'enverte en vous.

00:21:15Ah !

00:21:16C'est bon.

00:21:17R premiere.

00:21:18Vous來 sampai à cetteurrection.

00:21:19Desольно.

00:21:20C'est bon, c'est bon, c'est bon.

00:21:50C'est bon, c'est bon.

00:22:20C'est bon, c'est bon.

00:22:50C'est bon, c'est bon.

00:23:20C'est bon, c'est bon.

00:24:50Ah!

00:24:54You in the fiddle!

00:25:04Bravo, Cat.

00:25:06I think these children are smart enough not to fauf your MTV style flash

00:25:09at the expense of content and moral values.

00:25:12That was wicked cool.

00:25:13Do it again.

00:25:15I'd love to, but Shamu is right.

00:25:16I really should be going.

00:25:18No, don't go!

00:25:19No, I should go!

00:25:21I should let you and the fish have all your fun conjugating verbs,

00:25:24cleaning a room, doing long division.

00:25:26No, you have to stay!

00:25:29All right, I'll stay.

00:25:30Yeah!

00:25:31Oh, yeah!

00:25:32But if I'm going to stay, there's something I want to show you.

00:25:35Something magical and full of wonder.

00:25:41It's called a contract.

00:25:43You want us to sign this?

00:25:45Just a formality, really.

00:25:47Or they.

00:25:49Magical time-traveling elves.

00:25:53Yeah!

00:25:54Magic!

00:25:59Okay, they're my lawyers.

00:26:01Liability issues, litigious society, frivolous lawsuits, you understand.

00:26:05Basically, this contract guarantees you can have all the fun you want and nothing bad's ever gonna happen.

00:26:11All the fun we want.

00:26:13Nothing bad will happen.

00:26:14No!

00:26:15Come on, Sal, for once in your life, try something spontaneous.

00:26:19It goes and gets my better instincts, but...

00:26:25Fine.

00:26:27Beautiful initial here.

00:26:29And here.

00:26:30And here.

00:26:31And here.

00:26:32Not here!

00:26:35Turn it over.

00:26:37This is nothing.

00:26:39Scratch this.

00:26:41Smell that.

00:26:42Terrific.

00:26:43Yaddy, yaddy, yaddy.

00:26:45Sign the bottom.

00:26:47Lit!

00:26:48Okay.

00:26:49Give me five.

00:26:50Four.

00:26:51Let's get this party started.

00:26:52Uh-huh.

00:26:53Hey!

00:26:54Check out this room.

00:26:55What now?

00:26:56Mom says we're not allowed in the living room today or else.

00:27:09She's worried we'll mess up the couches by jumping on them or something.

00:27:12And she's right.

00:27:13You can't jump on these.

00:27:15Not like this.

00:27:16They need some adjustment.

00:27:18Yee-haw!

00:27:19Let's take a look under the hood.

00:27:24Yeah.

00:27:25Here's my jacks.

00:27:26Sorry.

00:27:27What do we got here?

00:27:28Woo!

00:27:29There we go.

00:27:30It's oversized.

00:27:31That's unusual.

00:27:32Here it is!

00:27:33Down, Chimpa!

00:27:34Down, Chimpa!

00:27:35Get out of here!

00:27:36Spray me, would ya?

00:27:37Yeah!

00:27:38Oh!

00:27:39Oh!

00:27:40Oh!

00:27:41Oh!

00:27:42Oh!

00:27:43Oh!

00:27:44Oh!

00:27:45Oh!

00:27:46Oh!

00:27:47Oh!

00:27:48Oh!

00:27:49Oh!

00:27:50Oh!

00:27:51Oh!

00:27:52Oh!

00:27:53Oh!

00:27:54Oh!

00:27:55Ah!

00:27:56Oh!

00:27:57Oh!

00:28:06Thanks for the help.

00:28:12Back in a second.

00:28:14You're a couch mechanic.

00:28:15I've gotta call Mr. Catridge.

00:28:16Oh, mon frère !

00:28:18Mon frère ! Mon frère !

00:28:20Oh !

00:28:22Oh !

00:28:24That ought to do it.

00:28:26Woo !

00:28:40C'mon, kids !

00:28:42I could use a little company.

00:28:44What about Mom's party ?

00:28:46What about it ? We signed the contract !

00:28:48Wahoo !

00:28:52One cushion left, Sally !

00:28:54She'll never do it. She doesn't know how to have fun.

00:28:56Fun ?

00:28:58Sally, you're better than fun.

00:29:00Fun is beneath you.

00:29:02Remember what your mother told you.

00:29:04No one sets foot in the living room.

00:29:06You know what ? Let's just watch some flashbacks.

00:29:08Absolutely no one sets foot in the living room.

00:29:12You're fired.

00:29:14Fired.

00:29:16Fired.

00:29:17Fired.

00:29:18Fired.

00:29:19Fired.

00:29:20Fired.

00:29:21Fired.

00:29:22Fired.

00:29:23And that's why...

00:29:24This is where they buried my brother !

00:29:26Yeah !

00:29:34Yeah !

00:29:35Yeah !

00:29:36Oh yeah ! Yes !

00:29:37This is amazing !

00:29:38Like being in a circus !

00:29:40Yeah, but without those tortured animals or drunken clowns that have hepatitis !

00:29:45C'est-ce qu'ils ont dit que nous pouvons avoir fun ?

00:29:47Mais c'est qu'il n'y a pas, personne n'a jamais...

00:29:53Judas Priest, je ne peux pas croire ce que je vois.

00:29:57Oh, Mr. Quinn, j'ai juste demandé Conrad de sortir de la couch.

00:30:02C'est bon, Conrad, c'est bon !

00:30:04Sallie, baby, angel, princess...

00:30:08Je vais vous laisser en un petit secret, ok ?

00:30:12...Nobody likes a suck-up !

00:30:25What is the carrot ?

00:30:26I don't know !

00:30:33Oh !

00:30:35Good breath !

00:30:39What are you two looking at ?

00:30:42Is there a cat in here ?

00:30:51I'm gonna...

00:30:52You're gonna...

00:30:53I have to...

00:30:57Get out of here !

00:31:01See, kids, I told you, stick with me, it'll all work out !

00:31:12Oh, no !

00:31:14Little known fact, cats always land on their tushy.

00:31:19Thought they always landed on their feet.

00:31:20Oh, sure, now you tell me. A rump !

00:31:23So, kiddo, what do you wanna do for fun ?

00:31:26I wanna make cupcakes !

00:31:27Cupcakes !

00:31:28Oh, yeah !

00:31:30To the kitchen !

00:31:31Live from the kitchen, the following is a paid commercial announcement for Astounding Products !

00:31:35Hi ! Welcome to Astounding Products !

00:31:38I'm your host, the guy in the sweater who asks all the obvious questions.

00:31:46Now, here to tell us about his astounding product for making cupcakes, all the way from Cheshire, England, please welcome...

00:31:53Me ! Hello !

00:31:55Now, hello Owen !

00:31:57I'm so excited !

00:31:59Do you love making cupcakes, but hate all the hard cupcake work ?

00:32:04I know I do !

00:32:05Don't forget everything you know about making cupcakes !

00:32:09And say hello !

00:32:12To the amazing cupcakeinator !

00:32:15I'm so excited !

00:32:18Cupcake-a-what ?

00:32:19Cupcakeinator !

00:32:21This amazing device can instantly make cupcakes out of anything that you have in the kitchen !

00:32:28Wait a minute, did you say anything ?

00:32:30Anything !

00:32:31Anything !

00:32:32Yes, anything !

00:32:33Anything !

00:32:34Anything !

00:32:35Anything !

00:32:36Anything !

00:32:37I'll get you !

00:32:38And I'll look like a bloody accident !

00:32:40Anything !

00:32:41Now, let's see !

00:32:42Take off the lid !

00:32:43You can put in, I don't know, a carton of eggs !

00:32:45What ?

00:32:46How about a pack of hot dogs ?

00:32:47Why not ?

00:32:48Some ketchup !

00:32:49If I went about !

00:32:50I know what you're thinking !

00:32:51Even a fire extinguisher !

00:32:53There we go !

00:32:55Now, close the lid and Bob's your flippin' uncle !

00:32:58What an astounding product !

00:33:01Oh yeah !

00:33:02Open the drawer !

00:33:04Fill the patented cupcake in and out a tray !

00:33:09Close the drawer !

00:33:12Then plate it in a conventional oven !

00:33:14Oh yeah !

00:33:19Delicious cupcakes are just minutes away !

00:33:22Did you just say minutes away ?

00:33:24That's impossible !

00:33:25You're not just wrong, you're stupid !

00:33:27Now wait just a minute !

00:33:29And you're ugly, just like your mum !

00:33:32Did you just call my mother ugly ?

00:33:34Shut up !

00:33:35I mean it !

00:33:36I will end you !

00:33:37Oh !

00:33:38Um...

00:33:39Cat !

00:33:40Your tail !

00:33:42What about it ?

00:33:44Oh, I see !

00:33:46I've chopped it off !

00:33:47Well, that's interesting because...

00:33:49Son of a !

00:33:51Look, I'm not saying we're going to sue !

00:33:57I'm just saying we have a case !

00:34:00We'll talk later !

00:34:01Ixnay !

00:34:02Ixnay !

00:34:03Hi !

00:34:04Uh...

00:34:05Cat ?

00:34:06Is the oven supposed to be making that sound ?

00:34:10Of course !

00:34:11That means they're almost done, Conrack !

00:34:13Conrack !

00:34:14That's what I said, Condor !

00:34:15Cat !

00:34:16Now that's my name !

00:34:27Yep !

00:34:28They're done !

00:34:30Oh, man !

00:34:31There's nothing to worry about !

00:34:32I'm sure they still taste fine !

00:34:34Ugh !

00:34:35They're horrible !

00:34:36Who wants some ?

00:34:37Come on !

00:34:38Come on !

00:34:41Oh.

00:34:42My.

00:34:43Cotton !

00:34:44Ow !

00:34:45Cat !

00:34:46You need to clean this mess up.

00:34:47Pronto !

00:34:48We have a contract !

00:34:49All right !

00:34:50I'll try !

00:34:51Huh ?

00:34:52You don't try !

00:34:54You do !

00:34:55Yes, ma'am !

00:34:56Right away, ma'am !

00:34:58I'll be right back !

00:35:00Whoa !

00:35:01Whoa !

00:35:06Hi, how are ya ?

00:35:08Look !

00:35:09I'm a girl !

00:35:10Hooray !

00:35:11Stop !

00:35:12That's !

00:35:13Mom's dress !

00:35:14A roof !

00:35:15This filthy thing ?

00:35:16She was gonna wear that tonight and you ruined it !

00:35:17Honey, it was ruined when she bought it !

00:35:18Yeah !

00:35:19I told you all this would happen !

00:35:21But no one listens to a fish !

00:35:22A dog goes woof woof !

00:35:23And everybody knows that little Timmy's trapped in her log !

00:35:24But a fish speaks in plain English !

00:35:25All right, everyone !

00:35:26Let's just take a deep breath and calm down !

00:35:27You know who's gonna solve it ?

00:35:28Me !

00:35:42I am !

00:35:44mais un fish qui parle en anglais.

00:35:46All right, maintenant,

00:35:47on va prendre un profond et calmer.

00:35:53Vous savez qui va le faire?

00:35:55Me.

00:35:56Je vais prendre tout.

00:36:00Et je sais juste les gens qui font ça.

00:36:14Dans cette boxe sont deux choses.

00:36:18Je vais vous montrer les deux choses.

00:36:20Et je vais vous montrer les deux choses,

00:36:22et je les n'appelle Thing 1 et Thing 2.

00:36:24Ces choses ne vont pas vous battre.

00:36:26Ils veulent avoir un plaisir.

00:36:28Donc, sans plus d'adieu,

00:36:30meet Thing 2 et Thing 1 !

00:36:37Oh, oui !

00:36:41Thing 1, Comrade Sally.

00:36:43Thing 1, Thing 2, Comrade Sally.

00:36:45Comrade Sally, Thing 2.

00:36:46Thing 1, Thing 2, Thing 2,

00:36:47Thing 1, Comrade Sally.

00:36:49Conrad, I am the cat.

00:36:51Ah, yes, of course.

00:36:53Thing 2 would like to clarify

00:36:55that just because he wears the number 2

00:36:57does not imply in any way that he's inferior

00:36:59to Thing 1.

00:37:00And all of the above.

00:37:01He says you may feel free to call him

00:37:03Thing A if you like.

00:37:05He will also accept Super Thing,

00:37:07Thing King, Kid Dunna, My Chocolate Thunder.

00:37:09Or dead.

00:37:11Thing 1 says he's Thing 1 for a reason

00:37:16and some people should just get used to it.

00:37:18It's a Thing Thing you wouldn't understand.

00:37:21Okay, enough.

00:37:23You are quickly turning into one of my least favorite things.

00:37:26Listen, Comdex, you probably don't want to do that.

00:37:30Why not? It's just a crate.

00:37:32This isn't just any old crate.

00:37:34It's the trans-dimensional transporter later.

00:37:37It's kind of like a doorway

00:37:39which leads from this world to my world.

00:37:41But it says made in the Philippines.

00:37:43Yes, but not this Philippines.

00:37:45Look.

00:37:47Now, I'm not usually a rules guy, but this is a biggie.

00:37:51No opening the crate.

00:37:53No looky, no touchy.

00:37:55Got it?

00:38:04Things front and center.

00:38:06Cool.

00:38:07All right, Things.

00:38:09I'm not paying you to stand around and look pretty.

00:38:11Here's Mom's dress.

00:38:13Oh, body dress.

00:38:19What about the couch?

00:38:21Which couch?

00:38:22The clean one or the horribly stained one?

00:38:25Oh!

00:38:40Incoming!

00:38:45Pat!

00:38:46They're wrecking the whole house!

00:38:53How?

00:38:55Matt!

00:38:57Matt!

00:38:58tyranny

00:39:09Pirate, help!

00:39:11Help yourself!

00:39:14dot com

01:10:06Nous avons réveillé la maison et nous avons réveillé une pop-tune pour le soundtrac.

01:10:10C'est important.

01:10:13Je pense qu'il y a juste une dernière chose à checker.

01:10:18Ah-ha.

01:10:29Il y a tout comme tout est bien.

01:10:31Mais tu es encore plus que beaucoup de cigars.

01:10:33Et vous, laye-off de sauce.

01:10:39Cat,

01:10:40ce jour a été...

01:10:42...amazing.

01:10:45Merci, Cat.

01:10:49Pour tout.

01:10:54Conrad.

01:10:57Sally.

01:11:01Adieu.

01:11:03C'est parti.

01:11:06Cat!

01:11:07Oh!

01:11:07Huh?

01:11:08Wait, Cat.

01:11:09Don't go.

01:11:10Oh, ha-ha.

01:11:11Oh!

01:11:12Oh!

01:11:13Ah!

01:11:14All right, kids.

01:11:18This place better not be a mess.

01:11:20I'm...

01:11:21...home.

01:11:22Hi, Mom.

01:11:23Hi, Mom.

01:11:24Oh!

01:11:25Ms. Walden.

01:11:26Home so soon?

01:11:27The children were angels.

01:11:29Thanks, Mrs. Puan.

01:11:30Hello, John.

01:11:31Ah!

01:11:32Lawrence, what happened to you?

01:11:37They...

01:11:38...happened to me.

01:11:40Your...

01:11:40...demonic...

01:11:41...children.

01:11:44They destroyed your house?

01:11:49The house was alive.

01:11:50The wall was made of paper.

01:11:52I fell off the cliff.

01:11:53And the giant cat!

01:11:56The giant cat!

01:11:58The giant cat!

01:12:00The feller.

01:12:02Larry.

01:12:03Larry.

01:12:04You look terrible.

01:12:06And my mom thinks you're insane.

01:12:10This is what we in sales call a win-win scenario.

01:12:17Joan, you were passing up the opportunity of a lifetime.

01:12:19You know what kind of kid your boy is.

01:12:23I mean, who are you going to believe?

01:12:28You're right.

01:12:29I do know what kind of kid Conrad is.

01:12:31He can be irresponsible.

01:12:32Yes.

01:12:33He makes bad choices.

01:12:34Yes!

01:12:35Sometimes he makes me want to tear my hair out.

01:12:37Yes!

01:12:38Yes!

01:12:39Yes!

01:12:40But he's a good kid.

01:12:42And I believe in him.

01:12:44Now I'd like you to leave.

01:12:45What?

01:12:46Joan.

01:12:47Joan.

01:12:48Joan.

01:12:49Joan.

01:12:51Joan.

01:12:52Oh, Joan.

01:12:53Joan.

01:12:54Joan!

01:12:55Joan!

01:13:01Oh.

01:13:02Oh.

01:13:05Oh.

01:13:06Will you marry me, Joan?

01:13:07Joan.

01:13:08Joan.

01:13:09Joan.

01:13:10Joan.

01:13:11Joan.

01:13:16Yes!

01:13:17Yes!

01:13:18Yes!

01:13:21Yes!

01:13:22Yes!

01:13:23Yes!

01:13:24Yes!

01:13:25No!

01:13:26Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada

01:13:56C'est parti !

01:14:26Oh! Hello! I was just, uh, I really should be going.

01:14:33How'd they get so small?

01:14:35Oh, yeah!

01:14:41Come on, things. Let's go. What's on my schedule for tomorrow?

01:15:01What do you say we go on vacation?

01:15:05How about Hawaii? I like Hawaii.

01:15:09I should warn you, there are certain places that don't allow certain things.

01:15:13Oh, things are complicated.

01:15:17Kids are getting weird. Things are getting tough.

Catégorie

Transcription

Recommandations