Loneliness on the Rise

KentOnline / KMTV

Thrive Homecare are hoping to tackle misconceptions surrounding loneliness later in life, highlight the avenues of support and offer advice to families worried about someone they love  Chris Gage joined us.

Transcript

00:00Now, in a world where we feel like we're more connected than ever, seemingly, with our phones,

00:06social media, even the way we're speaking now, virtually, we can feel like we are more

00:11connected. But for some people, that's just not the case.

00:15Yeah, absolutely. And particularly for older people, but it affects all ages, there is

00:21a real issue where people feel aligned. And it's an issue for hundreds of thousands of

00:31people across the country and in Kent. And that is because we don't necessarily have the

00:38social connections. And this particularly affects older people as they age. And many of us will

00:44know older people who are perhaps living at home, they don't get out so much, they're not

00:49so connected with their friends, maybe their partner isn't around anymore. And that loneliness

00:56becomes very real for people in their own homes.

01:00And I suppose a key thing here is that we don't know if somebody's lonely or not, because

01:05the point is that they're not able and they're not seeking out that help or support from other

01:10people around them. So it is very easy, I suppose, for people to just slip under the radar.

01:15Yeah, completely. And services don't necessarily know about it. You know, people just aren't

01:21seen so much. And often people's friendship groups are also ageing at the same time. People

01:28perhaps develop dementia or other long term conditions in older age, and we just don't

01:34necessarily connect to know about them.

01:36And at Thrive Home Care, you sort of specialise in giving people one on one support and provide

01:44companionship and wellbeing care as well. But you sort of said that it's beyond just the

01:50check ins and the tea rounds as well, there needs to be some deeper connections, I suppose.

01:55Yeah, completely. And this is really at the heart of our approach to this, about long term

02:02trusting relationships, and that it's in those day to day, regular connections with the same

02:09person that is focused on them as an individual and understanding what's important to them, that

02:18people get to be seen, and they cease to kind of withdraw into themselves, but rather start coming

02:26out of their shell, because they feel important, again, fundamentally. And to give an example of

02:33that, there's a lady, Sheila, that we support, she's losing her sight and living at home more and more

02:41on her own, not getting out. And we put in place one to one companionship for her. And one of the first

02:46things she wanted to do was go to the peony farm, which was kind of a few miles away, and she hadn't been

02:52there for years. And so our companion arranged that, of course, we've got all the insurances and

02:58all the risk assessments to do that sort of thing. And she went to the farm, had a lovely afternoon,

03:05and they were having tea and cake afterwards. And she mentioned, because they're getting to know

03:11each other and building that relationship, that she had a dear friend around the corner that she

03:16hadn't seen. And our companion encouraged her to give that call, which is, and it's often the

03:24confidence thing that starts to go, people become kind of more withdrawn, their confidence kind of

03:30starts to fall away. But she got the confidence back up, put in a phone call, and 10 minutes later,

03:36she's there, reconnected with a dear old friend. And she wrote to us, to the companion next week,

03:43to just say how incredibly meaningful that day was for her. Not only has she been able to reconnect

03:49with nature, but also with friendships. And it's really that reconnection that's at the core,

03:56reconnecting people with life, with the things that are important, with them.

04:01That's such a lovely story, and how you were able to sort of help Sheila and give that,

04:06but it just reflects how much sort of resources needed to be able to get that connection going as well.

04:12It sort of begs the question, is there enough support for people like Sheila and her friend

04:16in Kent? Is it accessible?

04:20No, there isn't enough support for everybody. I think there's a much longer conversation we

04:27could have about the challenges in the care system. But what I would say is that there are

04:34services out there that we can really reframe how we think about loneliness, how we think about older

04:42people's experiences. And like all of us, we all become withdrawn and apathetic if we don't think

04:50people care about us. And that is at the heart of it is putting in place the things that are going to

04:57make people feel really cared about and important and meaningful deep relationships are the heart of

05:04what is going to cause that to happen. Not just meeting care needs, going in, dealing with the physical.

05:12It really does need to be about their relationships, their well-being, the things that give them meaning

05:19and purpose in the day to day.

05:21And sorry, Chris, just before we go, is there any advice you can give to people out there,

05:26to loved ones? We can see your website up on the screen now, but is there any targeted advice

05:31you can give just very quickly before we go?

05:33Of course, yeah. And the main thing is when you are there to try and be fully present with the

05:40person. Talk about what's happened in the past, perhaps when they were kind of performing at their

05:49best, kind of really validate people and makes a massive difference. And the other thing I really

05:53would say is get in contact with care services that really do focus on relationship and companionship

06:01and start putting that in place early because it makes a massive difference and can really help

06:07people not slide into such lonely, isolated state.

06:12Chris Cage from Thrive Home Care, thank you so much for your time today. Some really important messages

06:17and advice that you've given to our viewers. Thank you so much for your time.

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