- 5 days ago
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00:00If that's another fucking lift you ain't in, living in my roof...
00:21Honestly, you lot love attics, keep in the barn and piss in the field.
00:33It'll be a lot easier.
00:35You know, who's done it then?
01:03Oh, the Millers. They were in a cult. You might have read about it. Dead messy.
01:09But at least now they're with their alien overlord or whatever the fuck they thought was going to happen when they blasted each other's brains out.
01:15R.I.P.
01:18You're quite weird, aren't you?
01:21Oh, thanks.
01:23Hey, if you ever want to come over and try your hand at embalming, just give us a pill.
01:30It'll be nice to hang out.
01:33I do.
01:34It's a fucking hell, not ten.
01:36Jesus Christ.
01:38Jack, mate, you do some sexy flirting up there.
01:40Oh, fuck off.
01:41I thought we would need to sort my loft out.
01:43We are.
01:44Are you sure it's Cardi's fucking foal?
01:46Vinnie, the rats have made a nest out of pizza boxes, which didn't come from me, because I don't eat foreign fucking food.
01:53All right, all right. There's too many for traps. And poison? No chance. My sheep might eat it.
01:59Why would your sheep eat poison in a fucking loft in a barn?
02:04Have you seen them goats that can climb mountains?
02:07Well, what's to stop a fucking sheep going up a ladder?
02:10I couldn't help overhearing that you've got a bad case of the ratus ratus.
02:15It's Latin for rat. Given the scale of the problem, right, there's only one one you can trust who can fix this. Unfortunately, he's a bit of a twat.
02:28Oh, fucking rat catcher.
02:31But you, lads, can call me Curtis.
02:35Hey, fuck me. You never said it were Curtis Plum.
02:38Curtis Plum, the DJ. That's right.
02:40Yeah.
02:41Ex-DJ.
02:42Oh.
02:43I've been that hedonistic lifestyle 15 years ago.
02:45I heard you had a breakdown.
02:46I had a fucking epiphany.
02:48His bird shacked up with another bloke, and he smashed up a Londis with a cricket bat.
02:53I donated me decks to UNICEF and realised what me true calling in life was.
02:57Killing rats.
02:58Amen.
02:59How much do you want for fucking murdering a ton of them in his loft?
03:03I don't work for money.
03:05Well, neither do we most of the fucking time, do we?
03:08What do you want?
03:09I want my old manager Mickey's ashes.
03:12In his wife's house, in the lounge.
03:14In an urn.
03:16There's the address.
03:18Do you know what I mean?
03:20Here.
03:21Don't lose it.
03:22Once they're in my possession, I'll get rid of your rats.
03:25I'll buy out for a deal.
03:26All right.
03:27I'm gonna have to already up on this, Vin.
03:29If the council get wind of this, I'm fucked.
03:32All right.
03:33I'm already on a section 1026 notice.
03:35So?
03:36Cunts.
03:37It should have been a section 1045, if anything.
03:39All right, now.
03:40Or a section 1022.
03:42I did have a section 1009, but that got overturned.
03:45Shut up and fucking stop saying numbers at me!
03:48Dickhead.
03:49I'm gonna send our Ashley round scope back the scene.
03:51If it's clear, we'll get that shit for you tonight.
03:53Get gone.
03:54Go on.
03:55Okay.
03:56Buzz in.
03:58So, I googled the wife.
03:59Right.
04:00Her name is Gina Mead.
04:01She was in a girl band in the 80s called Pink Ordeal, and has been on top of the pops.
04:04Not once.
04:05Not twice.
04:06But, would you believe it, three times.
04:08Shut the fuck up.
04:09Listen to me.
04:10We're robbing a fucking house.
04:11We're not writing a autobiography, are we?
04:13Biography.
04:14Eh?
04:15It'd be biography.
04:16If we were writing it, it'd be a biography.
04:17Auto means oneself.
04:18You know, like, auto for late, or to notch yourself off.
04:21Can you do that?
04:22Well, if I've been keeping up my Pilates, then, yeah.
04:24I fucking swear to God, I'm gonna auto for late the lot of you.
04:27Keep wittering on me.
04:28You're getting on me tits with you.
04:29Good evening, fellas.
04:30Shit.
04:31Big fella.
04:32Short fella.
04:33Chubby fella.
04:34And one with a hideous neck tattoo.
04:36All right.
04:37Weird egg with your moustache.
04:39I can have you for that.
04:41Offensive language.
04:42You fucking started it.
04:43I'm just letting you know that I've clocked you up here in the old grey jotter.
04:50Fuck me.
04:52Oh, fine.
04:53Carry on.
04:54Bye, then.
04:55Officer.
04:56Turd.
04:57Fucking hell.
04:58I don't need you.
04:59Fucking hate you.
05:00Good evening, man.
05:01I can't find me fucking aisle.
05:03Oh, no, no, no, no.
05:04Just quit.
05:05Shit!
05:06You just walk round!
05:07You can just walk round like this.
05:08Oh, bollocks, man.
05:09Come on, Ash.
05:10You can take them off.
05:11What?
05:12What?
05:13Set the vallies off.
05:14Look who will.
05:15Quiet.
05:16She might be inside.
05:17Jesus crap.
05:18What?
05:19What? What?
05:20Set the bally's off. Look cool, Will.
05:22It's quiet. She might be inside.
05:25Jesus crap. What?
05:27The fuck?
05:29He said there weren't any dogs here, Ashley.
05:31That's not a dog, is it? It's a meerkat or something.
05:33Looks like a wig.
05:34It's a fucking dog. Get it before it parks.
05:37God, dude, it's a mutant.
05:39It's... Hiya.
05:41His name's Tom O. Look at his tag.
05:43What?
05:44It's called Little Tom O. It's called fucking Little Tom O'Neil.
05:46Get in the fucking house.
05:49Oh, bingo. What are you doing?
05:52Let me go.
05:52Dude, I'll eat first, you fucking lemon.
05:55Shhh.
05:57Oh, fuck.
05:58There's four of them.
06:00Oh, shit. Which one's Mickey's then?
06:01Put that fucking dog down.
06:02My beloved spouse, love of my life, darling Elizabeth.
06:05I've got no fucking idea.
06:06Shit. Right, but fuck it. Let's just take any of them.
06:10You fucking elf!
06:12You can pick the wrong elf this time!
06:14What are you doing? Going fires!
06:15Oh, shit!
06:17Oh, fuck me.
06:19Oh, fuck me.
06:20Oh, fuck me.
06:22Ah!
06:23Oh, fuck me.
06:25Oh, fuck me.
06:27Hit him down, hit him down, hit him down.
06:29Hit him down!
06:30Oh, fuck me, hell she's bit me, lad.
06:33Oh!
06:34Oh, fuck me.
06:35We're just here for the urn that has Mickey in it.
06:39You what?
06:41Who sent you?
06:42Huh?
06:43It wasn't Curtis Plum, was it?
06:44No, it wasn't.
06:45No.
06:46I'm gonna smash the urn!
06:48I'll punch you down!
06:49I knew I wouldn't!
06:50I was!
06:51It's over here!
06:52You should've done that, man!
06:53Who's broken?
06:54HE SIGHS
06:58Curtis Plum's a fucking liar!
07:00Tell him I hope he gets leprosy of the arsehole!
07:04Dude, I swear to God, I thought she was gonna smash the urn!
07:06Oh, fuck, dude!
07:10I think I'd rock my nose again.
07:19It's too big, Dad.
07:20It's not too big.
07:22There you go.
07:23All right.
07:24Oh, thanks for the bike, Vin.
07:27Oh, you're all right.
07:28I haven't nicked it off a kid.
07:33How's therapy going?
07:34It's good.
07:35Yeah?
07:35Yeah, it's all right.
07:37Do you feel like it's helping?
07:38I don't know.
07:40I don't know.
07:42Yeah, it must be.
07:43Yeah.
07:50What's going on between us, Vin?
07:55What do you mean?
07:57Come on.
07:58You know what I mean.
07:59That seat's too high up.
08:11It's fine.
08:11It's not, because if he falls off...
08:13He won't fall off.
08:14Just let...
08:15Let me just have a fiddle with it, and I'll come back.
08:17I'll come back in a sec.
08:18Come here to me.
08:19Show me a wheelie.
08:30I can't believe you sent this Curtis plum guy your grandmother's ring.
08:33Oh, I was 14 years old.
08:35It's not like I did it last week.
08:36Yeah, but why?
08:38Oh, everybody knew him and wanted him.
08:42Wanted to feel his body pressed up against stairs in a night of explosive passion.
08:46Rumor had it that he was a big lad.
08:49Oh.
08:50And that he could ride you to sunrise and still have enough left in the tank to smash the
08:57ghee out of you and your best friend after a light breakfast.
09:09Someone's told me that you want to meet a decrepit old DJ.
09:14I'm getting the ring back.
09:19Fuckin' hell, here we go.
09:21Oh, God.
09:25Fellas.
09:26Hmm?
09:26Ladies.
09:27Are we sorted or what?
09:29Did you get them?
09:29It's been a bit of a miss, that.
09:30Missed that, pal.
09:37But fuckin' Fecto.
09:38Are you happy?
09:38Mm-hmm.
09:39Fabulous.
09:40See?
09:42He's fancy coming in for a brew or what?
09:44Oh, yes, I would.
09:44A can of worms, love.
09:46Fuck.
09:46Come on, man.
09:47Sure good.
09:47Fuck is that?
09:48Cheese in there.
09:49Yeah, and pickle.
09:50Dude, it is a shithole in here.
09:52It's the deal.
09:53Yeah, come in, come in.
09:54We look around as soon as he fuckin' fucks off.
09:59Just moved in, Chris.
10:00Well, yeah, sort of, but it was about 2015.
10:04Just after me auntie Moira died.
10:06Yeah.
10:07She used to like things quite neat.
10:10Actually, guys, can you just give me a minute?
10:11I'm just gonna have a little, uh, tidy up.
10:14Yeah, man.
10:14Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
10:15Thanks for having us, man.
10:18What the fuck?
10:19Jesus, lads, this place is like a murderer lives here.
10:22I swear to God.
10:23Get your fuckin' voice down.
10:24He's not a murderer.
10:26He's an oddly topless, sensual DJ.
10:29Vincent, he's got hooks on the fuckin' ceiling and he kills rats.
10:33I mean, serial killer shit, isn't it?
10:35Yeah, and he never wears a top.
10:36Yeah, Geoffrey Diamond never wore a top.
10:37Yes, he did.
10:38Fred West wore tops.
10:40Ted Bundy wore tops.
10:41I've got a Ted Bundy top.
10:42I've got a Ted Baker top.
10:43Stop talking about what serial killers wore bloody tops.
10:47He's a fuckin' DJ, that's it.
10:49He's a nice fella, he's sensitive.
10:50Huh, he's a DJ?
10:51Right, fair enough, then.
10:52Cos they're all nice lads, then, aren't they?
10:53Whoa!
10:54Hey!
10:55Now, then.
10:55Now, then.
10:56Now, then.
10:56Thanks for having us.
10:59Come in, make yourself at home.
11:00Yeah, just...
11:01Hey!
11:02Sorry.
11:04Do you have any chairs, or...?
11:06Jeez, chairs.
11:07Look, I am so used to not having any that I didn't even notice that the...
11:14Yeah, love, cos you're up the duff, aren't you?
11:17It's not quite the phrase I'd use, but thanks.
11:20I don't really have many visitors.
11:23Just thinking out loud, but do you reckon you don't have any visitors cos, er, you don't have any chairs?
11:28Maybe I got rid of chairs cos nobody came round.
11:30Yeah, that's what I'm saying, er.
11:34Jeez, I forgot, Mickey.
11:38Mickey.
11:42Can you just excuse me a minute?
11:46Actually, it would mean a lot if you could all be there.
11:52It would mean a lot if you could all be there.
12:00Thanks... thanks, guys.
12:01Thanks for being here.
12:12That's it, aren't you?
12:12So long, you fucking prick!
12:26Oh!
12:27Well, hello.
12:27Group.
12:28Sorry about the, er, eclectic array of cobs, but there is a lot of you, isn't there?
12:40Dude, what's all this shit in here?
12:43What do you mean?
12:44What do you mean, what?
12:44It's madness.
12:45It's madness in here.
12:46This can't all be from rat-catching, love.
12:49Well, you'd be surprised.
12:50Mm.
12:50But, yeah, you know, once I'd had my, er...
12:54Mental breakdown.
12:56Epiphany.
13:00I couldn't bear to be parted from objects of great beauty.
13:04Mm.
13:05I can see that, but all this shit now, dude, it's anxiety-inducing the gasp.
13:10Just so much stuff, Aaron, it's unnatural.
13:12It's... I'm riddled with anxiety.
13:14I've been here ten minutes, I can't imagine how you feel.
13:17There you go.
13:19What can I say, brother?
13:21Tidying just didn't me thing.
13:22Mm.
13:23I thought about getting some money once, but, of course, they just want money, don't they?
13:27Unbelievable.
13:28Yeah.
13:28Some people.
13:32Well, we can... we can clean the house.
13:34Come on.
13:34Yeah, yeah, let us all be out, get rid of all this mess.
13:37All right, I suppose a spring clean might be a good idea.
13:40Although, a lot of this stuff is very precious to me.
13:46Valuable.
13:47Oh, by the way, I've got some unopened nappies somewhere in the house.
13:50You can have them as payment.
13:51Oh, thank you.
13:52Say, well, that sorts that right out, doesn't it?
13:55Hey, listen, I want you up at Jim's farm tomorrow morning, 9am.
14:00Three, two, one.
14:02It's two fucking hours late, then.
14:05The love of Christ.
14:06Listen, Rent-A-Kill give you an half day of window, didn't they?
14:09So you're still up on the fucking deal.
14:11Will you stop whining?
14:12Oh.
14:12Here he is, look.
14:13Finally.
14:14Hold on.
14:19Morning.
14:20Oh, here he is.
14:21Efficient, I see.
14:24The right fucking season, at least.
14:26I overslept.
14:27It's a good job you've been paid already,
14:29because I've been ducking your wages now.
14:31I don't like your attitude arshing me out, brother.
14:34Tell you what, I'll go and I'll come back when you're full of peace and love, yeah?
14:36You'll have a long fucking wait, pal!
14:38Just hang on a minute.
14:39I'm sorry about it.
14:40Just listen.
14:41He's always been this way, and he has got a load of rats shagging the life out of his loft,
14:46so we need it sorting.
14:47Council's pecking his head now, aren't they?
14:50So it'll be fucking nice.
14:54Pretty please.
14:55You prick.
14:59Pillock.
15:00So what's the sleeping bag for?
15:02Dead rat overflow?
15:04Oh, I like to nest in with him, you know, until job's done.
15:06And Mrs Ratcatcher's happy with that as shit?
15:09Mrs?
15:10No.
15:12I'm young, free and single, brother.
15:14It's not going to be a problem with staying, is it, Vin?
15:16Because I think, you know, it's best I'm out of the way while the girls clear the house,
15:19and, you know, it's going to be tough for me watching my life's work disappear in the back of my mind.
15:23Absolutely.
15:24No, I get it, man.
15:25I get it.
15:26It is no fucking problem whatsoever, is it?
15:31Join the club.
15:33Why not?
15:34There's more nob-ends slept in that attic recently in the fucking Hilton.
15:38What do you want?
15:39Fucking room service?
15:42That'd be lovely.
15:45Oh, Jesus Christ.
15:46I rest.
15:51Ah, maybe we'll just forget about the ring.
15:53It's not as if the ground was that happily married.
15:54No way!
15:55No!
15:57Are you up for this, you?
15:58Anything to take my mind off, JJ?
16:00Anyway, I'm going to need to find them gross nappies that Curtis mentioned if I'm going to be a single mum.
16:04Oh, God, listen, you are going to be everything what that baby needs, all right?
16:10Anyway, you're not single.
16:11You can stay at my house for as long as you like.
16:15Right, where do we start?
16:16Cousin Fergal, it'll be over later in his dead nan van, and he will rid this place in no time, and he will give us 200 quid for the pleasure.
16:24All we have to do is find that feckin' ring.
16:26It's preparation, preparation, preparation.
16:32Is this a fucking bed and break?
16:33Stop pestering me, will you?
16:35Yeah, even the bloke with the terriers said he could get the job done in two days.
16:39Still getting on, then.
16:40Here, lazy prick.
16:42I'm never fucking doing that shit for you again.
16:43Don't get used to that.
16:44Mate, I wasn't going to leave this tosser in my house by himself then.
16:48In fact, I've changed my mind on those rats. Let's just nuke the fucking lot of them!
16:55Oi! Stop shouting, all right?
16:58So what was your fucking beef with me? He's a sweetheart.
17:00He doesn't even wear tops, Vin. And that's a black belt wanker move.
17:04I need to give the rats full access to me pheromones.
17:07Right.
17:08He wants to be up there a week. A whole fucking week, Vin.
17:11You just don't respect me methods, brother.
17:13I heard him in the attic reciting poetry to him.
17:17Rats are highly intelligent mammals.
17:19Rats are cunts!
17:20You've got to gain the trust, you see. Gain the trust, then BAM!
17:25What do you mean? You're just twatting with your steak?
17:28Pretty much.
17:28Fuck me.
17:29How do you think I maintain 12% body fat?
17:31Well, it's just twatting rats to death, innit?
17:34I'm the rat master. You need to trust what I'm doing. Trust my methods.
17:40I actually invite them to leave first. Man or a rat out.
17:46Then, if they don't...
17:55Ah!
17:55What are you going to do?
17:56No!
17:57Ha ha ha ha ha!
17:58Don't put him down!
18:04That's all.
18:04Oh!
18:05Oh!
18:05Hey, hey.
18:14Oh, he loves.
18:20Come on, wait.
18:35We're never going to get that smell out of our nostrils.
18:44I am in so much pain.
18:46My neck.
18:47All right, tell Fergal it's the recycling next.
18:50And then this is the stuff that wants fixing.
18:53And then this stuff is good for resale.
18:56Yeah?
18:57We're not even a third way through the house yet, are we?
19:00You know, let's just call them dickheads so they can help.
19:03Yeah.
19:04Yeah?
19:05Yeah, we did.
19:06We need help.
19:08Eight hours manual labour and all we've got to show for is some old boxes of cassettes and this, yo.
19:14Which I can only assume is an old bit of acid.
19:17Tom, do you want that?
19:18No, no, no, no, I'm going to stress it.
19:19Narrow, aren't I?
19:20Fucking hell.
19:23Red balloons.
19:2499 red balloons.
19:26Fucking legendary, that stuff.
19:27Jesus Christ.
19:28No, all right, all right.
19:29It's all right.
19:29What I'm saying is I'm not going to take it, am I?
19:32It's just, um...
19:34It's a collect as item.
19:35It's vintage, yeah.
19:37Hang on.
19:38Okay, how do you, Angel, did you find us?
19:40No, but...
19:41Of course it's.
19:44Oh, that is vintage.
19:46Oh.
19:47It looks pagan.
19:50Oh, what's it made of?
19:52No, that doesn't feel like paper, that.
19:55One way to find out.
19:58Oh!
19:58What?
19:59What?
19:59What?
19:59What?
20:00It's a mammary papilla.
20:04Huh?
20:04It's a nipple.
20:05It's a fucking nipple.
20:06Surely that's not the first dead nipple you've had in your mouth.
20:08So it's some kind of animal skin with tattoos.
20:11Oh, my God, it's human.
20:13Oh, my God!
20:14Oh, my God!
20:15It's me!
20:15It's so fucking tasty!
20:16I can taste it!
20:17Oh, they're still together, Tom.
20:19Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa!
20:21Very nice, yes.
20:22Well done.
20:24You, you, follow me.
20:26Where?
20:26The one place that I've seen this symbol before.
20:35Closed my arse.
20:38It's not me.
20:39It's not necessary, that, isn't it?
20:42I said I'm closed.
20:45I'm closed.
20:47Right, yes, well, it is quite important, so...
20:49And I'm talking to dead people.
20:51Oh!
20:52Anyway, do you know what this is?
20:56Rings a bell.
21:01It's an occult symbol I had drawn on the wall
21:03to jazz the place up a bit.
21:06No idea how it got on your map, however.
21:09Hmm.
21:09Map?
21:10However.
21:10Interesting.
21:13Vellum?
21:14Mm-hmm.
21:16Human?
21:17Oh.
21:17Oh.
21:18Yeah.
21:21Give you 20 quid for it.
21:22Great.
21:22Eh, eh, eh, eh, Ashley, no.
21:24Let's get out of here.
21:28There it is.
21:28Oh!
21:29Eh, eh, eh, sticky fingers.
21:30It's, you know.
21:32Hmm.
21:37Hmm.
21:39Hmm.
21:41Hmm.
21:41Hmm.
21:42Hmm.
21:46Okay.
21:48Yeah, I'll ask him.
21:51100.
21:53That's good.
21:55The spirits are very keen for me to have it.
21:57Tell them all.
21:58Right, yeah, but crucially, what you're saying is
22:00you're not going to give us any information.
22:01Right.
22:02Very good, lads.
22:03Onwards.
22:04It's cursed.
22:06The map is cursed.
22:08Shhh.
22:08Shhh.
22:09Shhh.
22:09Shhh.
22:10Shhh.
22:11I curse it.
22:13And I curse you too, you little wanker.
22:15Shhh.
22:15Shhh.
22:16Yeah.
22:17To be honest, when you're five foot five
22:18and you hang around with these cunts,
22:19you're pretty much cursed to his ears, aren't you?
22:20Yeah, so, I'll take me chances.
22:24Erm, please, please, can I buy some crystal before I'm here?
22:29Sure.
22:30Shhh.
22:32Ah.
22:32Why didn't we take the hundred quid, Tommel?
22:39That's way more than anyone else is going to pay
22:40for a soggy old bit of skin we found in Curtis Plumsgaff.
22:43Cos, Ashley, you saw the look on the woman's face.
22:45Whatever this map leads to is clearly worth more
22:47than whatever she was offering, you know?
22:49You mean like treasure?
22:50No, not fucking...
22:52Well, yeah, treasure.
22:53It's treasure.
22:53This is weird, right?
23:08I just hate my fucking hands.
23:10The...
23:11They're odd to me.
23:14My fucking face is the same.
23:15I'll look in a mirror,
23:17every now and then it just...
23:18It feels like...
23:20It's not my face.
23:23Like it doesn't belong to me.
23:25I mean, I could just be a bloody narcissist.
23:29You know,
23:30who...
23:30thinks he's fucking ugly or something of that kind, you know?
23:35Hmm.
23:38Well, we're all narcissists to some degree, wouldn't he?
23:41Hmm.
23:42Hmm.
23:43We used to have this...
23:46..fancy dress thing once a year at school.
23:53Because Dad was always drunk, it was like last minute.
23:56Everything was last minute.
23:58So we'd have to sort of pull together
23:59some sort of a fucking outfit from around the house.
24:03So I remember once,
24:05I wore a snorkel with the bloody goggles
24:08and them fucking flipper things.
24:10When we got to school,
24:13me Dad sort of announced me as a fucking snorkel boy
24:16or some shit like that.
24:17He found it hilarious.
24:18But I suddenly got really fucking embarrassed.
24:21No one laughed at it.
24:23They just...
24:25...stayed.
24:26Oh, it must have been hard.
24:35Do you remember how it affected that little boy?
24:39I wanted to get away from it all.
24:44I wanted to disappear.
24:45Become invisible.
24:48Invisible.
24:49Hmm.
24:50Why?
24:51Just how much of a fucking...
24:54...ugly little weird, or must I be,
24:57to be stared at like that
24:59by the teachers and by the kids.
25:01Do you think that's why you constantly change your appearance?
25:08You know, the tattoos and stuff.
25:12Rather than to be noticed,
25:14you become unrecognisable
25:15and therefore invisible.
25:19Maybe, actually, yeah.
25:21I just...
25:21I don't...
25:23...feel like it's bloody...
25:26...vanity.
25:26Do you know what I mean?
25:27I just...
25:27I've never liked the way I look.
25:29Never.
25:32Bloody hell.
25:33Sometimes when that goes off, I'm furious.
25:36And the rest of the fucking time, I'm just relieved.
25:40Homework?
25:41I must not call myself an ugly cunt
25:45and have to write it down a hundred times.
25:47Is that it?
25:48No, I want you to be more aware
25:50of other people's feelings.
25:53Seek first to understand,
25:55then be understood.
25:58Hmm.
26:00It didn't work, by the way.
26:02What's that?
26:04You're not invisible.
26:06I can see you.
26:08Hmm.
26:10All these are from my loft.
26:12Yeah.
26:14Good job you don't charge by the kilo.
26:17What'd I tell you, Jim?
26:20Trust me.
26:21Trust you?
26:23I know your type.
26:25Ex-pretty boy.
26:27Never done an hard day's work in your life.
26:30Spraying it about all around town,
26:33but can't turn your hand to anything manual.
26:35Whoa, whoa, whoa.
26:37One.
26:37I'm highly trained.
26:39I'm the best.
26:40Then why aren't you finished the fucking job yet?
26:42Two.
26:43I don't go fucking spraying it around town.
26:46Not anymore, anyway.
26:51Not since, er...
26:52Gina.
26:56Is that the...
26:57ex who battered the lads?
27:02Fantastic woman, Jim.
27:04Sounds like a total fucking nightmare.
27:06Spirited.
27:10Spirited.
27:13Strong thighs.
27:18Hey.
27:19We...
27:19We've all had women who make us cry.
27:26Yeah.
27:29Whether they...
27:30break our hearts or...
27:33run off...
27:35with our new...
27:37and very fucking expensive milking equipment.
27:40just...
27:44make sure you're finished by tonight.
27:50When you said Tomos sounded weird on the phone...
27:52I don't know.
27:53Well, what did he say?
27:54He said he was at the lady pub.
27:56It's where the map leads, apparently.
28:01Found any treasure yet, Tom?
28:03Treasure?
28:07No, no, look.
28:10I'm looking for Bones.
28:12Yeah, she's, er...
28:13she's helped me realise what's going on.
28:14I mean, it's obvious when you think about it, innit?
28:16The garden of the lady...
28:18is Bones.
28:19Sorry, who's this...
28:20Clara Marie?
28:21No, you fucking idiot.
28:22No, it's the fucking ghost lady from the Rat and Cutter, innit?
28:25She...
28:25Mmm.
28:26Oh.
28:27Got to fill you in, hasn't I?
28:29I've had...
28:31a vision.
28:36Help me, Tomo.
28:37Find me, Tomo.
28:41Find me, Tomo.
28:45She wants me to put her flesh and her bones back together.
28:50This was her dream?
28:51More of a sort of waking nightmare sort of situation, yeah.
28:55Tomo, Tomo, sorry.
28:56You haven't had any of that old acid by any chance, have you?
28:59I did, because it was vintage.
29:01Right?
29:02But you promised Hans he wouldn't.
29:03What, what, Hans, but we don't tell Hans that I've had it, then?
29:05No, I've...
29:06Go on, then.
29:09How was it?
29:09It was.
29:11Piquant.
29:12Yet.
29:14Intense.
29:15Yeah.
29:16Anyway.
29:17She wants me to get her bones back,
29:18otherwise she's going to have to come and kill us all, so...
29:21Ready, get on with it?
29:24Bones.
29:25Bones!
29:25Bones!
29:45Shit.
29:46Fuck it.
29:52Vincent.
29:53Ah, baby.
29:55I've been better.
29:56Oh.
29:57All right.
30:01Never did get to thank you properly for the funeral.
30:04It was really very lovely.
30:07Until it all went tits up.
30:09It was my pleasure, man.
30:10Honestly.
30:11I mean, it wasn't a fucking pleasure, was it?
30:13It was a shaggy nightmare, but...
30:15You know what I mean? It's fine. I'm glad I cut out.
30:17Just a shame our Barry didn't get to see for himself just how loved he was.
30:21Fucking did get to see, though, didn't he?
30:23That fucking lunatic.
30:25Jesus Christ.
30:29Still can't believe he's gone.
30:32Miss him terribly.
30:34I'll fucking bet you do.
30:35I'll bet you do.
30:37Look, you're not on your own, man.
30:39You know, you've got your sister Donna.
30:40Donna's a cunt.
30:42Right.
30:43Right, then.
30:45I mean, that's fucking news to me, dude.
30:48Do not fuck with her, Vincent.
30:50I'm telling you this as a friend.
30:53I'm glad I could help you with your brother's funeral, but you're not a friend.
30:58I can't trust you after that fucking Dylan fiasco.
31:03What makes you so sure that I had anything to do with Dylan going missing?
31:07I was extremely fond of Dylan.
31:08Manolito has told me that he rescued him from the back of that fucking car boot.
31:14And you believe him?
31:15Yes.
31:17How very naive of you, Vincent.
31:20I've had a fucking text from Dylan himself.
31:23I fucking know it was you, Davey.
31:24Do not fuck with her.
31:37For fucking fuck's sake.
31:39I hope you were trying to make him see sense, and not just poncing about.
31:46Slowly, slowly, catchy monkey.
31:49What the fuck does that mean?
31:51I've got something to tell about the pretty one.
32:04Still fucking here.
32:06Heartbroken or not?
32:09Fucking had enough of this.
32:10Oh, yeah.
32:19Oh, fuck.
32:21If you got rid of them all, why are you still in my fucking loft?
32:25I like it up here.
32:26He stinks of rat piss!
32:28You lot, you've been so good to me.
32:30You know, cleaning me house and that, you know, and...
32:34And our little chats.
32:36You mean me shouting at you?
32:37It's been a long time since I've had this kind of connection with someone.
32:41Hey!
32:41We do not have a connection!
32:43And, you know, my house, it's just...
32:46It's too much, innit?
32:48You know, it's noisy and it's chaotic and...
32:52Well, up here in your little elastic hive...
32:54I've found peace.
32:58I'm not ready to let it go just yet.
33:01She really did a number on you, didn't she?
33:07Hey.
33:07Peace...
33:09Is up here.
33:11What you need...
33:13Is some closure.
33:15Hmm.
33:16Maybe...
33:17Post a turd through a letterbox and tell her how much of a horse she was for ruining your life!
33:23I was up one day, though.
33:24You know, on her back.
33:26Maybe not the turd thing, then, eh?
33:28I'd ever stop loving her, Jim.
33:31It's her face I see in every single rat that I kill, you know?
33:34Well, don't tell her that, either.
33:37No.
33:39Hey, the girls have probably cleared your house by now.
33:43Yeah.
33:44You should go home.
33:45Right.
33:46Have a shower.
33:47Then put a fucking shirt on.
33:53See how you feel.
33:55I was dancing when I was twelve.
34:05BFF, bro.
34:07BFF.
34:07I was dancing when I was twelve.
34:10I knew it!
34:12I fucking knew it!
34:14You know nothing, you fucking idiot.
34:18What's she doing, eh?
34:18We asked her to come.
34:19She's got something she's got to tell you about the map.
34:21Well, whatever you think is going on, it isn't.
34:24What I think is going on is I need to reunite this bit of flesh with these bones so the poor lost soul they belong to
34:31don't have to wreak their revenge from beyond the grave.
34:33I mean, it's obvious, isn't it?
34:37Well, if not, why have I found a lot of bones here, then, eh?
34:39It's a pub garden.
34:41It's probably chicken bones from a barbecue.
34:43No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
34:44That could be a foot bone, mate.
34:45Ha, ha, ha!
34:46I'm doing it.
34:46I'm fucking doing it.
34:48No, no, no, no, no, no, don't bury me, Matt.
34:50Stop it.
34:50So, what do you mean, your map?
34:51My map.
34:53Moira Plum was my lover.
34:55Moira, what, the rat catches auntie?
34:58Why was she drawing nipples on maps for you?
35:00She was my lover and my teacher.
35:02We've all been there.
35:04I used to have a fella came round to teach me maths to the side, Mr McIntosh.
35:07He taught me a fair few more things than maths, I'll tell you that much.
35:10No, not a school teacher.
35:13She was a clairvoyant, my mentor, and that map was a gift for me.
35:18But we had a huge row and never spoke again.
35:20Hang on, sup.
35:23Your clairvoyant ex-lover drew you a map on human skin.
35:28Yeah, we're always doing fun stuff like that.
35:31It's esoteric, innit?
35:32I mean, it's also a bit weird.
35:33Parking all that, where's the treasure?
35:35Treasure?
35:36X marks the spot.
35:37Coins and all that.
35:38No, that's not treasure.
35:41The X marks Moira's favourite erogenous zone on my body.
35:45You know, just inside the lady garden.
35:47You know, so the treasure she wanted me to find was my own.
35:54You know.
35:55No, I don't know.
35:56She brings a G-spot, Cardi.
35:57Oh.
36:00Give her that.
36:02Yeah, give me the...
36:03Oh, well, I'll tell you what.
36:04Actually, Cardi, I'm just going to say this and we'll say it out loud, right?
36:09If I'm doing any drugs again, just stop me.
36:11Just fucking stop me.
36:20Thank you, Jim.
36:22Don't you fucking dare tell them that I was nice to you.
36:26Now, fuck off.
36:27Sorry we didn't find the ring, Carol.
36:38Ah, do you know what, Heron?
36:40Doesn't matter.
36:40She would have been very proud of us now with this deep clean.
36:43Yeah.
36:44Oh, there it is.
36:45Good deeds are repaid.
36:50Here we go.
36:52Ta-da!
36:54What the fuck?
36:57My God.
37:01Sweet, Auntie Moira.
37:03It's amazing.
37:10What's that smell?
37:11Citrus detergent.
37:13Fresh.
37:13Smell of clean, innit?
37:15Bloody hell, I could get used to this.
37:18How can I ever repay you?
37:20Oh, don't worry about it.
37:21I'm after finding this box of cock rings, so we're sorted.
37:25I'm happy.
37:25Oh, I'm looking everywhere for them the other day.
37:29Here.
37:31A fan sent me this years ago with a letter.
37:35Meant a lot of the time.
37:37Bloody hell.
37:41You have it.
37:42It was a thank you.
37:46Thanks very much.
37:48Oh, my God.
37:48It's my granny's ring.
37:49I know it was your fucking granny's ring.
37:51He's been on his hand the whole fucking time.
37:53Well, pardon fucking me for not to expect the men's hands.
37:55For fuck's sake.
37:56Come on.
37:57Oh, shut up the very...
37:57Ladies, ladies.
38:00We have a group hug.
38:02Okay.
38:02Okay.
38:03Okay.
38:07Is that rat piss?
38:08Yeah.
38:09It looks nice.
38:10Just breathe it in.
38:12Oh, my God.
38:13Thank the girls for me again, will you?
38:20It didn't just clear me house, it cleared me head.
38:22Mm-hmm.
38:25A wise man once said that peace is up there, man.
38:30Oh, he's fucking right.
38:32I think it also involves not having a shitload of crap in your house, driving you insane.
38:37Do you know what I mean?
38:37Mm-hmm.
38:38Good lad.
38:40One love, bruv.
38:44Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
38:45Listen.
38:48I'm gonna be thinking about you.
38:51Go and get going.
39:00Fucking handsome.
39:03Ahem.
39:04Curtis Plum.
39:18I'm sorry, Gina.
39:21For a reading.
39:28They're real.
39:29Wait.
39:41Curtis.
39:45Oh, my God.
39:46Oh, God.
39:50Oh, fucking fuck me.
39:53Oh, fuck.
39:54Get in the house.
39:56Christ, I wish I had a libido like that.
40:19The person you are calling has...
40:22Fuck.
40:23Oh, fuck's sake.
40:30Yorda's had a caravan, Nick.
40:32It's a shocking business, this is.
40:35I'm going to offer 10 grand for its return.
40:37He's probably stashed all his fortune in it.
40:40That's what it is.
40:41It's definitely the McGregor.
40:42They must have hit it up beyond that hill there.
40:44Oh, my God.
40:45Oh, my God.
40:46Oh, my God.
40:46Bastard!
40:47Oh, my God.
40:47Oh, my God.
40:48Oh, my God.
40:49Oh, my God.
40:50Oh, my God.
40:51Oh, my God.
40:52Hey!
40:53What the fuck?
40:54Oh.
40:55I've got so much trouble in my mind
40:57I've got so much trouble in my mind
41:01I've got so much trouble in my mind
41:06I've got so much trouble in my mind
41:10Give me the strength to carry on
41:14Give me the strength to carry on
41:18Cause everything I got is just about gone
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