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Aliyan369
  • 6 days ago
#englishmovies #hollywood #english #movies#sexy #love #beauty #gay #erotic #hollywoodmovies #gay #gayboy #lgbt #lgbtq #chinesemovies #gayman #pride #gaypride #gayguy #love #gaylife #queer #lesbian #gay #lgbt #lgbtq #pride #bisexual #queer #love #transgender #trans #lesbians
Transcript
00:00:00Put it back, put it back, put it back, put it back, put it back.
00:00:03But he's blocking the door.
00:00:04Genius observation, that is, yeah.
00:00:06Maybe it's there for a reason, Victoria.
00:00:08Maybe the lock's busted.
00:00:13Don't be frightened.
00:00:15Here.
00:00:17Is it just me, or is Daz quite a looker?
00:00:23Definitely a looker.
00:00:25Hmm, I'm not sure.
00:00:27But we have just buried my sister's best mate,
00:00:29so I am going to let you take me out on a date.
00:00:33Ah, in the spirit of only living once, eh?
00:00:36Exactly.
00:00:37Come on, let's go.
00:00:38No.
00:00:39No, I might take you up on it, though,
00:00:41when you're a little less impaired.
00:00:48You two are sitting together.
00:00:51Er, near each other.
00:00:53Like you don't hate each other.
00:00:56We don't.
00:00:57No.
00:00:58We definitely don't.
00:01:00We do have regrets, though.
00:01:03Desperate ones.
00:01:04Yeah, desperate being the word of future about to hook up again.
00:01:07For sure.
00:01:08However, saying that, you could always don your masks
00:01:10and just pretend that you're not actually you.
00:01:13Hey!
00:01:14Stick your nasty beak
00:01:15back in its beak-y box.
00:01:17And what's going to happen if I don't, Vanessa?
00:01:22I've sorted things with Priya.
00:01:24Wow.
00:01:25Hey, it must be the wake.
00:01:26Nothing like a little death to forget infidelity.
00:01:29Oi, Frank.
00:01:30Is that what does it for you?
00:01:31The sweaty brow look.
00:01:33The worry lines.
00:01:34Er, Megan is a million lines better than you.
00:01:37A million lines there.
00:01:38You said it, yeah.
00:01:39The times.
00:01:40A million times.
00:01:41Mm-hmm.
00:01:42Anyway, er, speaking of scraping the bottom of the barrel.
00:01:46We're not!
00:01:48Right, leave it.
00:01:50She's just sad, pathetic, and desperate for a rise.
00:01:52Don't give her the satisfaction.
00:01:54Oh, hey!
00:02:08Super slosh girl.
00:02:09Brilliant.
00:02:11You ruined my dad and Megan.
00:02:13And now they're starting to get it together again,
00:02:16but you are still...
00:02:18You're still trying to mess it all up.
00:02:20Why?
00:02:21Is it because no-one can understand you?
00:02:23Because you've got no friends and no life of your own.
00:02:27You.
00:02:28You are a pathal...
00:02:30Pathological.
00:02:32Yes.
00:02:33A pathological...
00:02:34...interferer.
00:02:37And I will let you out once...
00:02:40I don't think you will.
00:02:41I will.
00:02:43I will let you out once you have apologised for everything.
00:02:48And then I'll let you out.
00:02:49Really?
00:02:51Well, you can't because the lot's broken.
00:02:53You can only open it from the other side.
00:02:55So well done you.
00:02:56Super screw-up girl strikes again.
00:03:05Help!
00:03:06Help!
00:03:07No.
00:03:09Help!
00:03:10Signal, stupid seller!
00:03:12Well, someone will see we're missing.
00:03:16Not me, they won't.
00:03:18Cos Noah's deep in video game trance and, er, Victoria's used to closing, so I won't be missed.
00:03:23Hmph.
00:03:24Understatement much.
00:03:26Not like anyone's gonna come looking for you either.
00:03:29Er, my sister.
00:03:31Just lost her best mate, sister.
00:03:33Don't think you're quite on her radar right now.
00:03:35All right, well, my dad, then.
00:03:36HE LAUGHS
00:03:37No, babe, I don't think your dad's really gonna be thinking about you now Megan's got him back in her clutches.
00:03:45No, basically, I'm stuck with you, aren't I?
00:03:47No, basically, I'm stuck with you.
00:03:49Oh, yadda, yadda, yadda.
00:03:52Ugh.
00:03:54Ew, why don't you have a swig of this?
00:03:55Cos the sooner you pass out, the better.
00:03:57Oh, always having a go!
00:03:58What? Well, I'm pathological, remember?
00:04:02Yeah, I shouldn't have said that.
00:04:03Oh, hey.
00:04:04I've heard it from people I care about a lot more than you.
00:04:08So drink, don't drink, I don't care.
00:04:11You and me are unfortunately stuck with each other for the foreseeable, aren't we, sir?
00:04:24SIGHS
00:04:25DAS
00:04:30Oh, not hot.
00:04:34Definitely not hot.
00:04:36I was just wanting to, you know...
00:04:39What?
00:04:40Throw caution to the wind, seize the day, live life to the full.
00:04:44All that impulsive rubbish.
00:04:47I mean, do it by all means, but maybe you don't do it with whom, cos I think you could do better.
00:04:52You're being nice.
00:04:55You're never nice unless you want something.
00:04:57Oh, I'm sorry.
00:04:59Now I'm being just as mean as you, aren't I?
00:05:00And I really, really don't want to be like you.
00:05:05Oh, sorry.
00:05:06Just can't help myself.
00:05:09Welcome to my world.
00:05:12Is that what it is?
00:05:14You just can't help sticking the knife in?
00:05:16Something like that, yeah.
00:05:17But I've locked you in here, and you haven't yelled once.
00:05:23I mean, if ever you could stick the knife in.
00:05:26You're too easy.
00:05:29Like a challenge.
00:05:31Is that your idea of fun?
00:05:34Winding people up?
00:05:35Are you really that bored and lonely?
00:05:41Hey.
00:05:43Do you know something?
00:05:46You are really, really good at being me.
00:05:51No, save it, please.
00:05:52This is like death by a thousand apologies, this.
00:05:54Okay, yeah.
00:05:59I am so bored and lonely.
00:06:02I go to town on people.
00:06:04Because I can.
00:06:07Even people I like.
00:06:09So you can like people?
00:06:10Not many.
00:06:11Some.
00:06:13Yeah.
00:06:14I especially enjoy toying with those people.
00:06:18Like the little boy who pulled the little girl's pigtail,
00:06:20wanting it to notice, isn't he?
00:06:21If I want someone to notice me,
00:06:29they notice me.
00:06:35Oh, I love returning from a night.
00:07:01Absolutely no help whatsoever.
00:07:03Well, the last thing that I can remember,
00:07:06you think your character has gorgeous eyes.
00:07:10But she can't wait for them.
00:07:12What?
00:07:14Anyway, it's my bad too, really,
00:07:16for leaving a mess.
00:07:17Well,
00:07:18you should really suck at me.
00:07:19This is so funny.
00:07:21Oh, rum,
00:07:22Sherry,
00:07:23Jane,
00:07:24this weird little...
00:07:25...side the barns again.
00:07:26Don't have a chance to grieve, eh?
00:07:28What do you really call Adam?
00:07:29Oh, or, erm,
00:07:32there's some French stick in here.
00:07:33If you don't mind giving your jaw, I'll work out.
00:07:36Beach jogging.
00:07:37Hello?
00:07:38Yo,
00:07:54Hadster.
00:07:54Have you come to join the party?
00:07:56No, I was after Marlon, actually,
00:07:58because I'd lost my door key.
00:07:59Well,
00:07:59when I say I've lost my door key,
00:08:02yeah,
00:08:02no, that's what I mean,
00:08:03I've lost my door key.
00:08:04I thought you were meant to be worming.
00:08:05And why are you wearing a cape?
00:08:08It's a worming
00:08:09cape.
00:08:10No!
00:08:12She...
00:08:12She's being daft.
00:08:14No,
00:08:15I, erm,
00:08:15I just called by to tell Charity that,
00:08:17that we've all decided to wear capes again today
00:08:20in, erm,
00:08:20in memory of Finn.
00:08:21That's very touching.
00:08:25Good.
00:08:26Okay.
00:08:26Right, well,
00:08:27erm,
00:08:27I'll, er,
00:08:27I'll see you at work then.
00:08:28Bye.
00:08:29Bye.
00:08:29Bye.
00:08:30Bye.
00:08:34And how was Johnny this morning?
00:08:35Yeah,
00:08:35he was great.
00:08:36He had a jam fight with Leo
00:08:37and he's still managed to look a whole lot better than you do.
00:08:39Hope you behaved yourself last night,
00:08:41young lady.
00:08:44What have you told her?
00:08:45About what?
00:08:46About me being at the pub.
00:08:47I haven't even mentioned the worming cape.
00:08:49In fact,
00:08:51I haven't mentioned anything about anything.
00:08:53Should I have?
00:08:54No!
00:08:55Listen,
00:08:55sorry,
00:08:56erm,
00:08:57apologies if I'm
00:08:57conclusion jumping,
00:08:59but
00:08:59was there not like a weird
00:09:01vibe between you and Charity?
00:09:04Probably.
00:09:05Right.
00:09:06Why?
00:09:09Have you not got you into anything dodgy,
00:09:11actually?
00:09:11No!
00:09:12Well, please don't tell me
00:09:12your dirty dad's been at her again.
00:09:15Not him,
00:09:16no.
00:09:16Not you.
00:09:17You and Charity?
00:09:24Urgh.
00:09:25Urgh.
00:09:26Oh,
00:09:26pack it in, Paddy.
00:09:27It was just a fumble.
00:09:28Urgh!
00:09:28End of.
00:09:29Ow!
00:09:30Ow!
00:09:30Ow!
00:09:31Ow!
00:09:31Ow!
00:09:32Ow!
00:09:32Ow!
00:09:33Ow!
00:09:33Ow!
00:09:34Ow!
00:09:34Ow!
00:09:35Ow!
00:09:35Ow!
00:09:36Ow!
00:09:36Ow!
00:09:37Ow!
00:09:37Ow!
00:09:38Ow!
00:09:38Ow!
00:09:39Ow!
00:09:39Ow!
00:09:40Ow!
00:09:40Ow!
00:09:41Ow!
00:09:41Ow!
00:09:42Ow!
00:09:42Ow!
00:09:43Ow!
00:09:43Ow!
00:09:44Ow!
00:09:44Ow!
00:09:45Ow!
00:09:46Ow!
00:09:47Ow!
00:09:47Are you in Charity?
00:09:48What?
00:09:49Drunken, ill-advised fumble.
00:09:52I was gonna say, an item.
00:09:54Which is insane, obviously.
00:09:56Yeah.
00:09:57Which I am.
00:09:58No.
00:09:58Whoa!
00:09:59You said it yourself.
00:10:01Urgh!
00:10:02And you're right!
00:10:03I mean, Charity.
00:10:04The conniving, swindling, bed-hopping...
00:10:07...woman.
00:10:09Well, you know the woman bit.
00:10:10That-that's her best quality.
00:10:11That-that's her best quality.
00:10:12Sigh.
00:10:13We got locked in the cellar, and we drank.
00:10:17A lot.
00:10:18And, er...
00:10:19...and then we kissed, but...
00:10:22...that's all.
00:10:23Normal day, then.
00:10:24Sigh.
00:10:25Unless she decides otherwise.
00:10:28Oh, Paddy.
00:10:29I am such an idiot.
00:10:30I mean, look how she tormented my dad.
00:10:33Well, then she needs to know.
00:10:40You don't mess with the nurse.
00:10:45Can I have a word?
00:10:46Sigh.
00:10:47Four down, six letters.
00:10:48To awaken.
00:10:50Arouse.
00:10:52A-R-O-U-S-E.
00:10:55Yes.
00:10:56Arouse.
00:10:57Sorry, what were you saying?
00:10:59Well, maybe in private, yeah.
00:11:01Sounds exciting.
00:11:02However, you might have told that thought, because I'm flying solo, and as you know, I only have one pair of...
00:11:07...hands.
00:11:09Frankie, baby!
00:11:11You wanna top up?
00:11:13No.
00:11:15Right.
00:11:16About last night.
00:11:17Hey, listen, it's fine.
00:11:18Whiskies on the house, yeah?
00:11:20I meant the...
00:11:22...you know...
00:11:23Oh, yes!
00:11:25Our little tongue twister.
00:11:27Quite the seductory to you, aren't you?
00:11:30No!
00:11:31It was a massive, monumental, ridiculous mistake, and it won't be happening again.
00:11:34Whoa!
00:11:35Buttercup!
00:11:36Chill your boots!
00:11:37Hey!
00:11:38Way better snug than your dad.
00:11:40So you're gonna use this against me?
00:11:43Like you did him?
00:11:44Well, there's nothing to use, unfortunately.
00:11:46You know...
00:11:47...the best thing for a hangover cure.
00:11:56No.
00:11:57No.
00:11:58Do you wanna come upstairs and find out?
00:12:10No.
00:12:11No.
00:12:12No.
00:12:13No.
00:12:14No.
00:12:15No.
00:12:16No.
00:12:17No.
00:12:18No.
00:12:19No.
00:12:20No.
00:12:21No.
00:12:22No.
00:12:23No.
00:12:24No.
00:12:25Running out on me again?
00:12:26I've, erm, I've gotta get to work.
00:12:28Mmm.
00:12:29Sit, please.
00:12:32See you next time, then, yeah?
00:12:33Charity, they won't be-
00:12:34Yeah, they will.
00:12:43Why are you always here?!
00:12:45Well, I could ask you the same thing, couldn't I?
00:12:47I don't expect to know the answer.
00:12:49Yesterday, you were worried that she was gonna tell everyone you'd kissed her.
00:12:52I know.
00:12:53And I went to talk to her.
00:12:54It looks like you did a lot more than talk.
00:12:56She's definitely gonna tell everyone now, ain't she?
00:12:58She might not.
00:12:59Of course she will!
00:13:00Well, you're just gonna have to deal with it, then, aren't you?
00:13:03It won't be as bad as you think, I'm sure.
00:13:06My dad can't find out.
00:13:08Nobody can.
00:13:09Oh, please, Paddy, can you talk to her?
00:13:11No.
00:13:12No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:13:13I've seen where talking can get you, and I don't wanna be the next one doing the walk
00:13:16of shame tomorrow.
00:13:17I'm desperate.
00:13:18And you're my only hope.
00:13:22I suppose so.
00:13:23Stop it.
00:13:33What can I get you, Paddy?
00:13:34I haven't come to drink, I've come to chat.
00:13:36Well, Marlon's busy, so I don't have to wait.
00:13:38Not with Marlon.
00:13:39With you.
00:13:40Can we just nip in the back?
00:13:41No, this isn't self-service.
00:13:42What do you want, Paddy?
00:13:43It's about what happened between you and Vanessa.
00:13:47She's very upset.
00:13:48Upset?
00:13:49What's she got to be upset about?
00:13:51I was brilliant.
00:13:52She wasn't complaining, anyway.
00:13:53Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:13:54I really don't wanna know any details.
00:13:56I just need, you know, to make sure, you know, Vanessa would prefer it if you didn't
00:14:04tell anybody or anyone because nothing like this has ever happened to her before.
00:14:08Well, it's not that big a deal.
00:14:10It's just sex.
00:14:11With a, with a, with a, with a woman.
00:14:13Yeah, it's just the same.
00:14:14No, it's not.
00:14:15Well, it is to me.
00:14:16Well, you're not like other people.
00:14:17Oh.
00:14:18Is that an insult?
00:14:19No.
00:14:20Far from it.
00:14:21I admire your attitude.
00:14:22You're not uptight.
00:14:23You don't care who you sleep with.
00:14:24That's definitely an insult, isn't that?
00:14:26All I'm saying, all I'm saying is you need to try and see things from Vanessa's point
00:14:31of view.
00:14:32I don't need to do anything.
00:14:34Cause she's a stuck-up cow who gets other people to fight abouts for her and do you know
00:14:37what?
00:14:38You ain't doing a good job, Paddy.
00:14:39What did you speak to her?
00:14:52And?
00:14:53I think the plan might have backfired a little bit.
00:14:56I don't believe this.
00:14:57How have you managed to make this worse?
00:14:58I don't know, because it's charity.
00:15:00I tried my best.
00:15:01Paddy, what am I supposed to do now?
00:15:03Try not to worry about it.
00:15:04Yes, I think your dad might be a bit upset, but I think he'll get used to the idea.
00:15:08Er, there's nothing to get used to.
00:15:10It's never happening again.
00:15:11Hey!
00:15:12You alright?
00:15:13Only, er, you were pretty out of it last time I saw you.
00:15:17I'm fine.
00:15:18Look, are you busy later?
00:15:19Why?
00:15:20Thought maybe we could go for a drink.
00:15:22Well, you're still drunk from the other day, are you?
00:15:25Well, do you want to or don't you?
00:15:26Yeah, alright then, yeah.
00:15:27Right, brilliant.
00:15:29Right.
00:15:30Laters.
00:15:31Oh, check him out!
00:15:32Can I have a coffee?
00:15:33All dressed up to come in here?
00:15:34I've got a date, if you must know.
00:15:35Ah, who with?
00:15:36Daz.
00:15:37Daz?
00:15:38That's right.
00:15:39Eh, after he knocked you back?
00:15:40I was drunk and he was being a gentleman.
00:15:41He didn't want to take advantage.
00:15:42Oh!
00:15:43He's here.
00:15:44Are you sure he's your type?
00:15:45I don't have a type.
00:15:46I'm pretty sure you do.
00:15:47Young.
00:15:48And pink.
00:15:49Wow!
00:15:50You look amazing!
00:15:51Thanks!
00:15:52Could, er, could we go to the pub?
00:15:54Yeah.
00:15:55Could, er, could we go to the pub?
00:15:57Yeah.
00:15:58Could, er, could we go to the pub?
00:16:00Yeah.
00:16:01Yeah.
00:16:02Yeah.
00:16:03Yeah.
00:16:04Yeah.
00:16:05Yeah.
00:16:06Yeah.
00:16:07Yeah.
00:16:08Yeah.
00:16:09Yeah.
00:16:10Yeah.
00:16:11Yeah.
00:16:12Yeah.
00:16:13Yeah.
00:16:14Yeah.
00:16:15Yeah.
00:16:16Yeah.
00:16:17Yeah.
00:16:18It's all right here.
00:16:19No, it's just ... um, I had a bit of history with this place.
00:16:20Long time ago.
00:16:21It's ... well David doesn't really like me.
00:16:25Plus your Dad's giving me the evils.
00:16:28Just ignore him.
00:16:29I'd feel a lot more at home in a pub though, if you don't mind.
00:16:34Right, well, if that's what you want.
00:16:37Yeah.
00:16:38I'll just, erm, just finish my drink.
00:16:39Yeah.
00:16:40Yeah.
00:16:41Oh, I love a man in uniform.
00:16:45Huh?
00:16:46Well, you were in the army, weren't you?
00:16:47Oh, right, yeah, yeah.
00:16:48Ah, I bet you looked fit.
00:16:50I bet he didn't.
00:16:53Don't ask.
00:16:54Ah, there you go.
00:16:57Hey!
00:16:58Well, this is a surprise.
00:17:00You want a pint?
00:17:01Yeah.
00:17:02Do you wanna get a table?
00:17:03No, no.
00:17:04It's my round.
00:17:05Well, you can get the next one.
00:17:06Don't send him away.
00:17:07I wanna hear all about this.
00:17:08Whatever this is.
00:17:10Oh, hey, you got an audience now?
00:17:14Did your dad follow you around on all your dates?
00:17:17No, this is a first.
00:17:19What are you doing here?
00:17:20I was thirsty.
00:17:21Pipe, please.
00:17:22Dad!
00:17:23Well, don't worry.
00:17:24I won't interfere.
00:17:25You enjoy yourself.
00:17:26Look, do you wanna go somewhere else?
00:17:27No, no, no.
00:17:28I'm fine.
00:17:29You are.
00:17:30Hey, you must be very proud.
00:17:31Vanessa, she's got herself a real catch.
00:17:33Well, at least she can get a man.
00:17:35Nobody'll touch you.
00:17:36Well, you did, so...
00:17:37Oh, well, you walked right into that room.
00:17:39Another whole round of drinks, please.
00:17:41Excuse me.
00:17:42I'm serving Vanessa.
00:17:43Well, I'll bring the drinks over if you wanna sit down.
00:17:45Sit down.
00:17:49Let me...
00:17:50Oh.
00:17:51Dan's doing my head in.
00:17:52Night for sleeping Hetty tonight.
00:17:54Aw, poor you.
00:17:56Aw, you need someone to keep you warm.
00:17:59Please don't do anything you're gonna regret.
00:18:02Who me?
00:18:03Paddy, have you seen the state of her?
00:18:05Do you think that's healthy?
00:18:06Throwing yourself at him like that.
00:18:08But that's not for us to decide, is it?
00:18:10She has to make up her own mind, really.
00:18:12Well, she did.
00:18:13Ness.
00:18:14I'm really sorry, babe.
00:18:15This...
00:18:16This isn't right.
00:18:17Do you really think that sleeping with him is gonna make you forget about...
00:18:21...last night?
00:18:22What happened last night?
00:18:24You don't have to be scared.
00:18:27You can be gay.
00:18:29It's fine.
00:18:30Um, she's on a date with a man.
00:18:32Yeah.
00:18:33But last night she was in bed with a woman.
00:18:36This woman.
00:18:44Was it true?
00:18:45Of course not.
00:18:47It is, isn't it?
00:18:49Only if it is, um...
00:18:52I'm not bothered.
00:18:53Oh, that is a difficult bloke response, that is.
00:18:57Were you not listening?
00:18:59She is gay.
00:19:00She is not?
00:19:01Well, she was the other night.
00:19:02One hundred percent.
00:19:03Very good kisser, by the way.
00:19:06I mean, come on, admit it!
00:19:08You're loving this, aren't you?
00:19:10Humiliating me.
00:19:12Well, it's true.
00:19:14I'm sorry.
00:19:16Oh, don't be.
00:19:17I know what she's like.
00:19:18You know, she used you to get to me.
00:19:20Why is this always about you, Dad?
00:19:25You don't think you're in love with Charity, do you?
00:19:29God, no!
00:19:30Oh no, it was nothing like that.
00:19:32She was just there and up for it and...
00:19:35Well, I haven't slept with anyone for a really long time.
00:19:39I'm sure you could have found somebody else though.
00:19:41It didn't have to be her.
00:19:43So...
00:19:44You must have been attracted to her.
00:19:47I was.
00:19:49Right.
00:19:51So...
00:19:52And this isn't me trying to put a label on you, but...
00:19:57Maybe you are gay.
00:19:59Or bi.
00:20:00And whichever it is, it's fine.
00:20:02You don't even have to decide.
00:20:04I just wish I knew.
00:20:06See you around, innit?
00:20:08Yeah, see you.
00:20:09That's the third time in a week I've seen her doing a walk of shame.
00:20:12Is she in or out?
00:20:14You tell me.
00:20:19I bet everyone's loving this.
00:20:22What, you and Daz?
00:20:23Always they've thrown her.
00:20:24Don't get me wrong, I was up for it.
00:20:26Well, at first anyway.
00:20:28Why?
00:20:29Just to prove a point to yourself?
00:20:31I don't know.
00:20:33Moment of madness.
00:20:35Anyway, nothing happened.
00:20:37We had a drink, chatted, and I ended up crashing out.
00:20:41Look, I know you didn't sleep with him.
00:20:44But how different did you feel when you were with Charity, in comparison?
00:20:50It was, erm...
00:20:53It was completely different.
00:20:56As in...
00:20:57Good?
00:21:03As in...
00:21:06I've never felt that way before in my whole life.
00:21:12Oh, hey!
00:21:13Come in!
00:21:14Or should I say...
00:21:15Come out!
00:21:17Teeny!
00:21:18Oh, ignore her.
00:21:19Look, I've been calling you.
00:21:20Is everything alright?
00:21:21I need to be somewhere.
00:21:27Just face up to her.
00:21:29Always fight...
00:21:30...for what you want.
00:21:31Oh, and er...
00:21:32...a cola.
00:21:33For Amelia as well.
00:21:34With ice.
00:21:35Hey!
00:21:36What can I get you?
00:21:37Jean tea?
00:21:38LGBT?
00:21:39To save you from gossiping, and for anyone she hasn't yet announced it to...
00:21:56I slept with Charity.
00:21:59Mum's a lesbian too.
00:22:01Good for her.
00:22:02But see, I don't know if I am one.
00:22:05Well, not yet.
00:22:06Cos right now, I don't know if I'm gay, straight, bi, curious.
00:22:12I'm just having fun finding out.
00:22:14So...
00:22:16No labels.
00:22:17No gossip.
00:22:18And no laughing.
00:22:19I kissed a girl once in 1964.
00:22:23Tasted of strawberries.
00:22:25Wasn't my thing, but...
00:22:27Good for you, love.
00:22:30Charity.
00:22:32If your stirring extends to two decent G&Ts, we'll be over here.
00:22:37Hey!
00:22:38I bet I can guess all your secret superpowers.
00:22:41Scratching.
00:22:42Flying.
00:22:44Gawping.
00:22:46She's gawping.
00:22:47What's yours, then?
00:22:48An acid-tipped tongue.
00:22:50Ooh!
00:22:51No.
00:22:52That's my weapon.
00:22:53My secret superpower...
00:22:55Er...
00:22:56Well, that is...
00:22:58Turning women gay.
00:23:00Watch out, David.
00:23:01Tracy could be next.
00:23:02Er, are you discussing my love life again?
00:23:04Sorry.
00:23:05You must think she's stalking you.
00:23:07Charity started it.
00:23:08Oh, Vanessa, please.
00:23:09Will you just admit it?
00:23:10I changed your life for the better.
00:23:12But hey, I've gone and ruined it for other women, haven't I?
00:23:14And men.
00:23:15Obs.
00:23:16Right, give that to Jack and that one to Sarah.
00:23:19That room.
00:23:20Why can't you do it?
00:23:21Kinda rushed off my feet.
00:23:22Is, er...
00:23:23Charity not helping you out?
00:23:24When is she ever useful?
00:23:30Oh!
00:23:31Careful!
00:23:32Hey!
00:23:33Where are you running off to?
00:23:34What business is that of yours?
00:23:36You know when you get stroppy, your nose twitches.
00:23:38It's very cute.
00:23:39I'll get really cute if you don't get out of my way.
00:23:47Hey.
00:23:48Erm...
00:23:50I'm sorry about before, you know, winding up.
00:23:52Isn't that what you do?
00:23:54I do a lot of things.
00:23:56Free later if you want me to fill you in.
00:24:05Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
00:24:07Oh, please.
00:24:08If it's that stupid video of a hamster riding an eagle.
00:24:11You do know it's been photoshopped.
00:24:12What?
00:24:13No, it's Rona.
00:24:14What?
00:24:15Riding an eagle?
00:24:16Being ridden by a hamster?
00:24:18Standing me up.
00:24:20Vanessa!
00:24:21Are you two-timing me?
00:24:24And you should try and pull a fast one.
00:24:26Paddy's hiding.
00:24:27No, Paddy's through there, I think.
00:24:29So it's left to me to do the annual schmooze of Veronica.
00:24:33Oh, she's a high-value client.
00:24:35We pay for lunch and listen to her insult us.
00:24:39Er...is she a farmer?
00:24:41No, on a stud farm.
00:24:42What?
00:24:43And that can't put a smile on her face.
00:24:45I do know what a stud farm is.
00:24:46I was joking.
00:24:49So this Veronica, is she a sour-faced, witchy-looking thing?
00:24:53Hmm.
00:24:54Sour-faced, witchy, and teetotal.
00:24:56How'd you know her?
00:24:57No, I don't.
00:24:58Just guessing.
00:25:01Next time, I'll choose the restaurant.
00:25:04It's like I got in my car in 2017 and got out in 1987.
00:25:09Keith Floyd in the kitchen and pound-shot Kim Basinger behind the bar.
00:25:14Do you mind?
00:25:16People are nice here.
00:25:18Aw, bless.
00:25:20I wonder if they possess a coffee machine here.
00:25:23And if anyone knows how to use it.
00:25:24Excuse me.
00:25:29If I said to you, espresso, what would spring to mind?
00:25:34Mmm, small.
00:25:36And bitter.
00:25:38Well done.
00:25:39Now trot off and make me one.
00:25:40And what you have in base?
00:25:41Hold that thought, I know exactly what you want.
00:25:46Another one of your delicious coffees, please, Charity.
00:25:52A large one.
00:25:54Oh, was everything to your satisfaction, by the way?
00:25:56She loved it.
00:25:57Don't pander, Vanessa.
00:25:59You know as well as I do, the lunch was mediocre.
00:26:02It was very nice.
00:26:04The lunch was nice.
00:26:07People are nice.
00:26:09It's not a great quality in a person, if you ask me.
00:26:11Wafting through life, taking the easy option.
00:26:14Excuse me, you know nothing about Vanessa.
00:26:16Or a life.
00:26:17Charity door.
00:26:18Rona's not afraid of speaking her mind.
00:26:20Probably why she's not even here.
00:26:21Because it's safer that way.
00:26:23Rona stood you up.
00:26:25Paddy stood you up.
00:26:27She's the only one who won't actually throttle you.
00:26:29I think you need to go and get the owner.
00:26:32I am the owner.
00:26:34So I'd like you to leave right now, please.
00:26:37Or I will pull that poker right out your backside
00:26:40and hit you over the head with it, yeah?
00:26:43Go on, twat on.
00:26:49You're drunk.
00:26:51I'll make sure Paddy Kirk hears about this.
00:26:53I cannot believe you just did that.
00:26:59Oh! My heart is racing.
00:27:01Yes, so is mine.
00:27:02Meet you down the cellar in two minutes, yeah?
00:27:03What?
00:27:04You heard.
00:27:05Oh, sir.
00:27:06Who cares, Vanessa?
00:27:10Where's Charity?
00:27:11Not here.
00:27:12They reckon she went to change a barrel, but that was ages ago.
00:27:14So who's serving?
00:27:15What the hell has got into Veronica?
00:27:16She's steaming.
00:27:18She's not drawn breath for the last five minutes.
00:27:20Paddy!
00:27:22No, no.
00:27:24I am sure she never intended to...
00:27:26No, of course not, Veronica.
00:27:28We are all very, very fond of you.
00:27:31Well, are you sure you couldn't have misunderstood...
00:27:34Hello?
00:27:35Hello?
00:27:39I'd like to know what has come over Vanessa,
00:27:41because she's normally very good at controlling her tongue.
00:27:45Paddy, what's wrong?
00:27:46I think I've just seen something there, shouldn't I?
00:27:51Ron are there for you.
00:27:52What?
00:27:56Um...
00:27:57Something to remember.
00:27:58Maybe.
00:27:59When...
00:28:00It's late and you're lonely.
00:28:02I am so sorry.
00:28:03Are we doing refills?
00:28:04She's trouble.
00:28:05Yeah.
00:28:06Maybe that's what I like about her.
00:28:07She's fun.
00:28:08It's fun.
00:28:09She makes me laugh.
00:28:10I'm happier when she comes into the room, you know?
00:28:11My heart...
00:28:12It beats a bit faster.
00:28:13Listen, um...
00:28:14I really hope I've not lost your business.
00:28:15You know, with Veronica.
00:28:16Oh, I don't worry.
00:28:17We'll send Paddy to go and make nice.
00:28:18Maybe you'll have to muck out her horses.
00:28:19In a French maid's outfit.
00:28:20While she takes photos.
00:28:21I hope so.
00:28:23Look, I...
00:28:24Home.
00:28:25Charity, I don't want any misunderstandings.
00:28:26I mean, this was fun, but...
00:28:27Why?
00:28:28It's not like we're suddenly across.
00:28:29I think it's funny, huh?
00:28:30My heart...
00:28:31...it beats a bit faster.
00:28:32No, it doesn't matter.
00:28:33I think this is funny.
00:28:34My heart...
00:28:35it beats a bit faster.
00:28:36Listen, um...
00:28:37I really hope I've not lost your business.
00:28:38You know...
00:28:39...with Veronica.
00:28:40I don't worry.
00:28:41We'll send Paddy to go and make nice.
00:28:42Maybe you'll have to muck out her horses.
00:28:44In a French maid's outfit.
00:28:45While she takes photos.
00:28:46I hope so.
00:28:47Look.
00:28:48Charity, i...
00:28:49I don't want any misunderstandings.
00:28:50I mean, this was fun, but...
00:28:51It's not like we're suddenly a couple.
00:28:53Don't flatter yourself.
00:28:54A couple of weeks I'll be bored of you.
00:28:58Go on, then. What are you offering up for the skills auction?
00:29:01Mm-hmm. What delights you gonna tempt us with, Vanessa?
00:29:04You'll have to tell us eventually we have ways and means.
00:29:07Mm-hmm.
00:29:09Knitting.
00:29:12Wow. I did not see that one coming.
00:29:15Yes, I am gonna teach people basic knitting skills. You got a problem with that?
00:29:19How old are you? Seventy?
00:29:21I have never seen you knit.
00:29:23I know. Well, I do it in private, so you two idiots don't take the make.
00:29:26Sorry. No, knitting's good. My gran used to do it. In the 1920s.
00:29:30And then there's Pearl. I mean, I think she's into it.
00:29:34Pearl's the one who taught me, actually. She's got the patience of a saint.
00:29:37Knit one Pearl, what?
00:29:38Oh!
00:29:39Actually, to be fair, it's supposed to be bang on trend right now.
00:29:42How many hidden talents can one girl have, eh?
00:29:45I hope you brought your piggy bank.
00:29:48With my knitting skills, there's bound to be a bidding war.
00:29:52Well, I'm not really a woolly jumper kind of girl, babe.
00:29:55Well, in that case.
00:29:57I'll have to think of some other service to offer you.
00:30:00Ness!
00:30:01Can you put your girlfriend down? Come and help us get ready, please.
00:30:03Thanks.
00:30:04I have a bid of £80. Is anybody prepared to go any higher? Anyone?
00:30:13OK. All done. At £80, then. Going once. Going twice. Sorry. Sold to Rishi.
00:30:22Yes!
00:30:25Unblock my drains any day of the week.
00:30:29Eighty-five.
00:30:31Ninety!
00:30:33I thought you were gonna snap me up.
00:30:35Hope you and Rishi will be very happy together.
00:30:37I'd rather be happy with you.
00:30:40What, that girlfriend and girlfriend?
00:30:43What?
00:30:44Well, that's what Rona seems to think we are.
00:30:47Well, she's wrong. Me and you were just...
00:30:49What?
00:30:51Two single women who like each other?
00:30:53Exactly.
00:30:54Right.
00:30:55Then where's the problem?
00:31:00Hey!
00:31:01Gaz, how you doing?
00:31:03Guess you'll be wanting me to fill your glass, top you up.
00:31:06Only I'm the woman who can sort you out.
00:31:09If you mean Dora wants a pint...
00:31:12Yes, please.
00:31:14Coming up.
00:31:16What are you doing?
00:31:17You're acting all maniac-y.
00:31:18Is Vanessa watching?
00:31:20Yes, she is. And so is half the pub.
00:31:23Not surprisingly.
00:31:25Don't you think it's a bit pathetic what she's doing all puppy-dogging stuff?
00:31:28She has been watching me all afternoon, yeah?
00:31:30Like some crazy hot stalker.
00:31:33Yeah.
00:31:34Just drop it.
00:31:35Still, shame to waste your efforts sitting round here.
00:31:37Maybe we should go into town.
00:31:38Excuse me!
00:31:39Who's wasting anything?
00:31:41There are plenty of decent people round here too, you know?
00:31:43I'm sorry, are you...
00:31:44Is she actually trying to flirt with me?
00:31:46Probably, yeah.
00:31:48She's been slavering over everyone else.
00:31:50Pathetic, isn't it?
00:31:52Sounding a little bit insecure there, Vy.
00:31:54Yeah?
00:31:55We'll back out your charity.
00:31:56You know, for someone who insisted that we were no strings, you've practically busted
00:32:00gut trying to get a rise out of me.
00:32:08Hey!
00:32:09Pete only went and fell asleep.
00:32:11Oh!
00:32:12That's not funny!
00:32:13Well, it could've been worse.
00:32:14He could've fallen asleep on Rona.
00:32:17I was exhausted.
00:32:19And you said you wouldn't say anything to anyone.
00:32:22Well, it's them pillows, innit?
00:32:23She brings it on herself.
00:32:25Bet no one's fallen asleep on you, have they?
00:32:27Tiny blonde rocket woman.
00:32:28So what can I get you?
00:32:29Apart from a quickie round the back.
00:32:30I've got a break in ten minutes, babe.
00:32:31On second thoughts, hang fire, babe.
00:32:32I may need to exercise my hetero side just for five minutes.
00:32:33And I thought you'd never ask.
00:32:34Oh no, babe.
00:32:35Look behind you.
00:32:36Oh.
00:32:37Anyway, I was here for my knitting date, Vanessa.
00:32:38It's the funniest thing anyone's ever said.
00:32:39We brought you wool?
00:32:40Yeah.
00:32:41Can I make a sweater?
00:32:42Well, why don't we just start with a scarf?
00:32:43Yeah, yeah.
00:32:44I mean, she's all wild and adventurous, this one.
00:32:45Be careful.
00:32:46Look, I've got to go and get ready.
00:32:47We'll get ready to go.
00:32:48Look, I've got to go.
00:32:49I need to go.
00:32:50I need to go.
00:32:51I need to go.
00:32:52You can't go.
00:32:53I need to go.
00:32:54I need to go.
00:32:55I need to go.
00:32:56I need to go.
00:32:57I need to go.
00:32:58I need to go.
00:32:59I need to go.
00:33:00I need to go.
00:33:01I need to go.
00:33:02I need to go.
00:33:03I need to go.
00:33:04It's a little bit of fun.
00:33:05Look, I've got to quickly pop back to work, but I'll just get you started.
00:33:09Okay, let's get knitting.
00:33:13I hope you find you more entertaining than I do.
00:33:22Hey, you, er, you might want to look at these.
00:33:25Ta.
00:33:29Through.
00:33:31Off.
00:33:33Is this what we call mindfulness?
00:33:35Can I have it back, please?
00:33:36Oh, so boring.
00:33:43I'm doing ever so well.
00:33:45How long will a scarf take?
00:33:46Forever.
00:33:48So you may have to low ease sights like I've done with her.
00:33:51Don't you have a man to trap somewhere?
00:34:00Keep going, Rishi. Very, very good.
00:34:03I'm working towards an iron jumper.
00:34:06Oh, I only teach Yorkshire knitting.
00:34:08So are you like a proper lesbian now?
00:34:11Nobody gets hung up on labels these days.
00:34:13And that means yes.
00:34:15Who exactly are you doing this for?
00:34:21No one.
00:34:22Not what?
00:34:23Not even yourself?
00:34:24Well, yeah, obviously me.
00:34:25Anything you can do, I can do.
00:34:27You know, I am sick and tired of your games.
00:34:31Now, except for getting me my drinks, please leave me alone.
00:34:34Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:34:38Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
00:35:02Oh, this is going to be amazing for your dating profile.
00:35:05Well, there's got to be someone out there looking for a blundering blonde who can chew up the gerbil.
00:35:10Yeah.
00:35:12Someone who doesn't have the emotional intelligence of an amoeba.
00:35:16Actually, if you must know, I cried myself to sleep last night.
00:35:21No, wait, that was because I was watching Titanic!
00:35:24You know, she foregoes a lifeboat for him.
00:35:27Yep.
00:35:28Yeah, now in my new top ten reasons for staying single.
00:35:31So there's no obligation to freeze to death should a massive iceberg hit.
00:35:34Here we go again.
00:35:35Ain't no one going to cramp my style.
00:35:38Bye, Charity.
00:35:41Come on, don't pretend you don't love it!
00:35:46Yeah, Pete's mucky wellies could ruin my carpet any day.
00:35:50Right.
00:35:51Well, I bet he can't spot megabacteriosis in a budgie, though, can he?
00:35:55Oh, let's face it, Paddy.
00:35:57Even the most miraculous kitten resuscitation will never replace a woman's need for a solid pair of manly hands.
00:36:07Ooh, gives me a strawberry.
00:36:09No, babe, it's good!
00:36:11It gives you a kind of exotic, adventurous air, which, let's face it, is a first view.
00:36:16It's not going to work.
00:36:17I am not going to rise to your...
00:36:18Amazing times.
00:36:20Look, let's get this straight.
00:36:22You are dull.
00:36:25Yeah.
00:36:27I said it.
00:36:28We might have had a few wild nights in the sack, but right now, Charity, you are boring me.
00:36:34Comprende?
00:36:35No-one's perfect.
00:36:40Shut up, Char.
00:36:48Hey!
00:36:49Glorious day, isn't it?
00:36:51Kind of, er...
00:36:52frosty, crispy, wintry morning.
00:36:56So I was thinking maybe me and you could go for a cheeky coffee, babe.
00:37:01Oh, come on, Vanessa, I'm trying to be nice of you.
00:37:05I'd rather poo a porcupine.
00:37:13Oh!
00:37:15Babe!
00:37:15You shouldn't have.
00:37:17She didn't.
00:37:18Although, there are a few things in there for your benefit.
00:37:21Er, Tracy!
00:37:22Oh, I will look forward to that.
00:37:25You've got a pint.
00:37:26Thanks.
00:37:26Oh, just a tonic water for me, please.
00:37:28I am still trying to shift this hangover.
00:37:32A bit frosty tonight.
00:37:33Nip in the air.
00:37:35Lovely smell of wood smoke.
00:37:37Out of the wood burner.
00:37:39What do you want?
00:37:40Look, this isn't easy for me, all right?
00:37:43I'm not used to all this indifference.
00:37:45I'm used to pressing buttons and people jumping the way I want them to.
00:37:49I don't have the time for all that.
00:37:50I'm a grown-up.
00:37:52I've got a grown-up job and a small person to look after.
00:37:54Oh, I have too, actually.
00:37:55I've got two small people and a big person.
00:37:56Okay, look, I know this sounds weird, yeah, but, um, I do actually care about you a bit.
00:38:04Quite a bit.
00:38:05And, you know, that's not something that you're going to hear every day or at all from me.
00:38:08You care about me so much that you play games to prove we're nothing.
00:38:12I just thought you and me were having a bit of fun.
00:38:13Yeah, well, maybe we are.
00:38:14And maybe that's all I can offer you right now.
00:38:17You know, and if that's not enough, fine, I get that.
00:38:23But if it's a Mrs. and Mrs. White wedding you are after, I am so not your woman.
00:38:31Even if it was, who said you would be?
00:38:36Really?
00:38:39I like you, Charity.
00:38:41I like you a lot.
00:38:43Well, that's as far as it goes.
00:38:47Can't make any promises, okay?
00:38:49I can't even promise that I won't hurt you in the end.
00:38:52You think I can?
00:38:54But up until that point, I will rock your world, if you like me.
00:39:05We go to the pub tomorrow.
00:39:10Vote for tonight.
00:39:13There's nobody in it, mine.
00:39:15There's nobody in it, mine.
00:39:15There's nobody in it, mine.
00:39:15Did you have a nice time then?
00:39:45Yeah, yeah it's alright if you like Lanzarote.
00:39:50So shall I come round tonight then to pick up where we left off?
00:39:54We left off with you leaving and not saying goodbye.
00:39:56I had to go away for the kids.
00:39:58You have a problem with that?
00:40:00Nope.
00:40:01Just think a postcard might have been nice that's all.
00:40:04Right well.
00:40:05I'll see you in a bit then.
00:40:07Oi!
00:40:08Get your coat, you pulled.
00:40:13Spoken for, sorry.
00:40:15Painting the town rainbow with them.
00:40:17Robert's getting his mojo back.
00:40:19I'm just checking, we are still casual.
00:40:22You still don't want tying down right?
00:40:24Yeah pretty much.
00:40:25Great.
00:40:26Might get my mojo back too then.
00:40:27Er, put her down.
00:40:28Hurry up you.
00:40:29Woohoo!
00:40:30Hashtag squad goals.
00:40:39Hashtag living my best life.
00:40:42Hashtag what happens in the club stays in the club.
00:40:44Yeah.
00:40:45Where's she gone?
00:40:46School disco.
00:40:47Oh gay bar.
00:40:48Oh.
00:40:49Is that skin off my nose?
00:40:51Hmm.
00:40:52Hashtag whatever you say.
00:40:53Oh.
00:40:54Oh, she's made a new friend and she's not that...
00:40:58What are you talking about?
00:40:59Shut up.
00:41:00Let me see.
00:41:01Vanessa is definitely worse for wear though cause I can't even understand the hashtags
00:41:08this time.
00:41:09Babe, seeing as you're quiet and Moses is with Sammy, I might just...
00:41:12Just stay for a whole shift for once.
00:41:14Babe, please.
00:41:15Serves your right for playing it so cool.
00:41:17Woohoo!
00:41:18Oh!
00:41:19Oh!
00:41:20Oh!
00:41:21Oh!
00:41:22Oh!
00:41:23Oh!
00:41:24Oh, good!
00:41:25Oh, good!
00:41:26It's not good.
00:41:27I'm good.
00:41:28Oh, good!
00:41:29Oh, good!
00:41:30Oh, good!
00:41:31Oh, good!
00:41:32Oh, good, good!
00:41:33Oh, good!
00:41:34Oh, good!
00:41:35Oh, good!
00:41:36Oh, good!
00:41:37Oh!
00:41:38Oh, good!
00:41:39Oh, good!
00:41:40Oh, good!
00:41:41Oh, good!
00:41:42Wow. Could have saved myself a trip.
00:41:47What?
00:41:48Well, I thought she was gonna pull. A muscle, yeah, but an actual person with those dance moves, no chance.
00:41:57She cares!
00:41:59Look who's here.
00:42:02Yes, because your texts stopped making sense and I thought you might actually get murdered.
00:42:06Aww, she cares if I die or not.
00:42:09Hey, babe, let's not run away with ourselves, yeah?
00:42:12Excuse us.
00:42:16Remember that little chat we had about lowering your expectations?
00:42:19Mm-hmm.
00:42:20It still applies, yeah?
00:42:21You came to find me, though. And you care!
00:42:26No!
00:42:27Shh!
00:42:28Don't ruin it.
00:42:33Crisscross will make it!
00:42:35Jump! Jump!
00:42:36Daddy Mac will make it!
00:42:37Jump! Jump!
00:42:38Crisscross will make it!
00:42:39Jump!
00:42:40Jump!
00:42:41Make you pay for going AWOL with the World of Pain!
00:42:43It's a rubbish remix.
00:42:44And we are not posting their microbrewery.
00:42:47Oh, I am back in the building, will you relax?
00:42:50Babe, you need to get out more, come on. Ages but a number, even if it's a big one.
00:42:55Shot, please, on the house.
00:42:58Party animals, us old folks turning in.
00:43:01Well, you've changed your tune.
00:43:02Yeah, well, the thought of you minding this place for a month can do that.
00:43:06A month?!
00:43:07Are you a maker?
00:43:10Right, I might follow their lead.
00:43:13Well, stop here if you want.
00:43:14I mean, Rona's got Johnny, haven't she?
00:43:17And you're okay.
00:43:18Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
00:43:20I thought you were cool with the lack of strings.
00:43:24Thought you were.
00:43:25I am.
00:43:27Well, why come running then?
00:43:29Because you invited me, you drunkard.
00:43:32Anyway, what if I said I wouldn't mind the odd string?
00:43:36What if I said them texts and pictures made me feel a bit sick and panicky and...
00:43:41Oh, I'm characteristically jealous.
00:43:44I'd say.
00:43:46What have you done with my girlfriend?
00:43:48Girlfriend?!
00:43:49Oh, go on, head for the hills.
00:43:52I'm going nowhere.
00:43:54Neither are you.
00:43:56Come here.
00:44:01Hey!
00:44:05Oh!
00:44:07Oh, look at that.
00:44:08Little fella carped it, has he?
00:44:11He's not dead, Charity. He's still under from his hop.
00:44:13Oh, right.
00:44:15Having said that, what a great idea that'd be.
00:44:17Ever thought about branching into your taxi, don't we?
00:44:19Stuff the ones that die?
00:44:21Er, no, weirdly.
00:44:23Be glad you can't hear her, Augustus.
00:44:25Augustus?!
00:44:27Never Brian or Alan, is it?
00:44:29Look, was there actually something?
00:44:30Oh, yeah. There was, actually.
00:44:32Just wondered if you fancied coming over later when you've dealt with the rat.
00:44:36He's a chinchilla.
00:44:37Who cares?
00:44:39You and me spending some consensual adult time together, that I do care about.
00:44:45Er, give us a minute to, er, to do his ops.
00:44:47I'll, er, get him settled and I'll be right over.
00:44:49Bedtime for everyone, then, eh?
00:44:51See ya.
00:44:52Hey.
00:44:53What's in the bag?
00:44:54Are we playing vets and...?
00:44:55Hamsters?
00:44:56Didn't think that one through, did I?
00:44:57We're not playing at anything.
00:44:58Rhona's twisted my arm into taking her call out.
00:44:59Mr. Kilby's got some frisky heifer he wants looking at.
00:45:00Has he?
00:45:01What about this frisky heifer?
00:45:02What she needs looking at?
00:45:03What if she needs looking at?
00:45:04In a...
00:45:05less invasive, non-medical way.
00:45:06Mm-hm.
00:45:07I promise now, I'm sorry.
00:45:08Unless...
00:45:09...we nip in the bag for five.
00:45:10Not in a critical way, this horny cow, is it?
00:45:11Oh, I can't.
00:45:12I'm late already.
00:45:13Really, really, really, really.
00:45:14Is that your final, final answer?
00:45:15Is it?
00:45:16Come on, I wanna know what's in your little magic bag.
00:45:17Got some kind of heavy-duty restraints?
00:45:18What if she needs looking at?
00:45:19What if she needs looking at?
00:45:20In a...
00:45:21less invasive, non-medical way?
00:45:22Mm-hm.
00:45:23I promise now, I'm sorry.
00:45:24Unless...
00:45:25we nip in the bag for five.
00:45:27Not in a critical way, this horny cow, is it?
00:45:29Oh, I can't.
00:45:30I'm late already.
00:45:31Really, really, really.
00:45:32Is that your final, final answer?
00:45:34Is it?
00:45:35Come on, I wanna know what's in your little magic bag.
00:45:40Got some kind of heavy-duty restraints?
00:45:42You know, just to pick something at random.
00:45:44Oh, I have got all sorts in here.
00:45:47I have got flea treatments.
00:45:49I have got tranquilizers.
00:45:52I have got constipation medicine.
00:45:54I've got plastic gloves for if the constipation medicine doesn't...
00:45:57Okay, babe.
00:45:58So that's pretty much more disgusting than dirty, so...
00:46:01I'd just like to see the vet now, please.
00:46:03Okay, well, erm...
00:46:04I'm gonna need you to lie down.
00:46:06Yeah, sure.
00:46:07Ta-da!
00:46:09I'm happy.
00:46:10What was that noise?
00:46:11What noise?
00:46:12Who's them bags and coats?
00:46:13Run.
00:46:14Oh, make it quick.
00:46:15I've got plans to curl up and die.
00:46:16What no heifer?
00:46:17Apparently she's perkier.
00:46:18Well, that was the problem.
00:46:19The over-perkiness.
00:46:20Come on, babe, I don't know why you're mad at me.
00:46:22You're the one who dropped me like a monkey stick and came running here.
00:46:23Er, maybe because I lose my brain every time I'm within five metres of you.
00:46:28I chose a bunk up with you over my job.
00:46:29All right!
00:46:30Look, I'm really sorry.
00:46:31Really?
00:46:32Really?
00:46:33Yes.
00:46:34For being unfairly sexy and irresistible.
00:46:35Oh, my God!
00:46:36Oh, my God!
00:46:37You're so sorry!
00:46:38It wasn't as good as I was told.
00:46:39I have to go back here.
00:46:40Well, that was the problem.
00:46:41The over-perkiness.
00:46:42Come on, babe.
00:46:43I don't know why you're mad at me.
00:46:44You're the one who dropped me like a monkey stick and came running here.
00:46:47Er, maybe because I lose my brain every time I'm within five metres of you.
00:46:50I chose a bunk-up with you over my job.
00:46:52All right!
00:46:54Look, I'm really sorry.
00:46:56Really?
00:46:57Yes.
00:46:58For being unfairly sexy and irresistible.
00:47:10I'm bossy.
00:47:11What?
00:47:15I thought you liked the bossy bit.
00:47:20I have messed up.
00:47:22I mean, really messed up.
00:47:24What, with work?
00:47:26What have you done?
00:47:27Have you got a pickover excited?
00:47:28I'm losing it.
00:47:29I'm proper losing it.
00:47:31A vial of ketamine has come missing from my bag.
00:47:36No, no, obviously I'm not saying you've took it.
00:47:39Oh, really?
00:47:40Because that's what it seems like to me.
00:47:42Look, I'm sorry.
00:47:42I have your girlfriend.
00:47:44You actually think I'd be capable of that?
00:47:48Oh, don't get upset.
00:47:49I'll get over it.
00:47:50No, I'm not upset over you.
00:47:52I'm upset because I've lost the tranquilizers.
00:47:53And because of that, I could lose something else.
00:47:55My job.
00:47:56Well, you need to stop panicking, all right?
00:47:58Because it will turn up.
00:48:00How?
00:48:00Where, when?
00:48:01I've already looked everywhere I can think of.
00:48:06So, Belle's just phoned.
00:48:09Lisa's out of surgery.
00:48:09They reckon she's going to be all right.
00:48:11Thank God.
00:48:12Well, she's tough as old boots, Lisa, isn't she?
00:48:14Have they got any idea what caused it?
00:48:15Well, yeah, this is the weird thing.
00:48:16They found ketamine in her system.
00:48:18They reckon she's been spiked.
00:48:19Yes.
00:48:25Finally.
00:48:26Excuse me, it's my morning off.
00:48:27And I had a cattle CPD day booked, but all those rotting tongues and rancid hooves.
00:48:33Ooh, just look at when she talks dirty.
00:48:35I just couldn't sum it up the interest.
00:48:38Liv, either you call her or I will.
00:48:41Oh, it's the RCVS.
00:48:42What's that, babe?
00:48:43Royal College of...
00:48:45...very scary bosses?
00:48:48They want me to contact them immediately.
00:48:51Hey.
00:48:54An investigator's still coming on Thursday, but now...
00:48:56...I've got a disciplinary hearing in London the next day.
00:49:00Well, wait.
00:49:01Maybe they're just covering their backs, you know, ticking boxes.
00:49:03Not this, not this said, for me to take my solicitor.
00:49:06So, I'd better look one up.
00:49:08In veterinary malpractice.
00:49:10You're getting that surgery and you scour it, OK?
00:49:13So the inspector can eat his dinner off the operating table.
00:49:16Oh, and here.
00:49:18Why don't you take this?
00:49:19This is Lydia's miracle polish.
00:49:22She'd kill me for lending it you, but you know what?
00:49:23The smell of it sends our brewery up wild.
00:49:26Charity Dingle recommending cleaning products.
00:49:29Yeah, I know, but, you know, first impressions count.
00:49:31Basically, the secret to my entire success.
00:49:35You'll be awesome, girl.
00:49:36Er, just give them lots of space, yeah.
00:49:40Shall we get you a drink?
00:49:45He'll go ballistic when he finds out.
00:49:47Poor Tracy.
00:49:48With Lena, I mean, that is such a shock.
00:49:51I know.
00:49:52Makes you wonder if any relationship's worth it.
00:49:54I mean, if they can't work it out, who can?
00:49:58Right, lady.
00:49:59I am sick to death of you avoiding my calls.
00:50:01You're holding out on me about something, aren't you?
00:50:03Look, if this is about me...
00:50:06You are so self-obsessed.
00:50:07Why is everything about you?
00:50:09So are you going to tell me?
00:50:09Bet you've told this one everything, haven't you?
00:50:11Erm, since when did you become the needy girlfriend?
00:50:13Do you know what, Vanessa?
00:50:14Let's forget it.
00:50:14Yes, let's.
00:50:15Cos none of this is worth it.
00:50:21Here's to you, Debs.
00:50:22I well and truly take my hat off to you.
00:50:25Oh, it's only a house.
00:50:26No, actually, it's way more than that.
00:50:28And you know it.
00:50:29Thought he could break you, didn't he?
00:50:30Well, turns out you broke him instead.
00:50:32So, way to go, kid.
00:50:34And while we're at it, here's to steering clear of relationships.
00:50:39I thought you were happy with Vanessa.
00:50:40Ugh, can't be doing with her moods.
00:50:42Oh, well, I like her and so do you.
00:50:44Yeah, well, all good things and all that.
00:50:46Oh, come on, Mum.
00:50:47You're good together.
00:50:49Hey.
00:50:50I saw you coming in.
00:50:51Really good for you.
00:50:53Look, I'm sorry for snapping at you like that.
00:50:55Call me a moody cow.
00:50:58Tracy and David breaking up, it got to me.
00:50:59And I took it out on you.
00:51:01I'm sorry.
00:51:01Oh, right.
00:51:02So we're not splitting up, then?
00:51:04What?
00:51:04No.
00:51:05It was just one little round.
00:51:06Why do you want her?
00:51:09Not particularly, no.
00:51:11Oh, you guys.
00:51:13Go on.
00:51:14Get a glass.
00:51:15Join in.
00:51:15Moody cow.
00:51:26Look at the bottom on that.
00:51:28What are you doing?
00:51:29More to the point, what are you doing?
00:51:31You did all this yesterday, babe.
00:51:32But not the floors.
00:51:33And I didn't tidy it.
00:51:34And the inspection's tomorrow.
00:51:35So that's...
00:51:36What's about drugs going missing?
00:51:38It's about whatever they want to make it about.
00:51:40Look, the better things look, the better it'll go, is my theory.
00:51:42Although I do have another theory, and I should be spending this time getting my answers straight.
00:51:47So where's Pearl?
00:51:49Oh, she's off Paulie.
00:51:50So Paul Rank, get her in doing this.
00:51:51Well, that's a great idea, except she's an old lady and I'm not a monster.
00:51:56Oh...
00:51:56What?
00:51:57Give me a cloth or something.
00:52:01You want to help?
00:52:02Want?
00:52:03No.
00:52:07Hmm.
00:52:10Well, the day after would be good if you can manage it.
00:52:12That way we can give you our full attention.
00:52:15That's great.
00:52:16OK, see you then.
00:52:19Funny, isn't it?
00:52:20How suddenly you had a load of phone calls to deal with once muggins here got cracking.
00:52:24Well, what can I do?
00:52:25Give me your full attention.
00:52:27That's what.
00:52:28I will look when we're finished.
00:52:29We are finished.
00:52:30Well, this is a mess.
00:52:34Well, now it isn't.
00:52:35Hop on.
00:52:36What, but the door?
00:52:37Locked, it's fine.
00:52:38Get on the table.
00:52:40Come here.
00:52:46What?
00:52:47Again?
00:52:48Cool.
00:52:49Might have lied about the door.
00:52:50Hi.
00:52:51What's she doing here?
00:52:52I'll tell you what she's doing here.
00:52:53She's here witnessing scenes of...
00:52:55Lesbianism.
00:52:56Yes.
00:52:56Yes, that.
00:52:57She's also here working for free to make up for being a drug thief.
00:53:01Now, can you go in the back room and clean up, please?
00:53:03Er, clean up what?
00:53:04Whatever's dirty.
00:53:06We'd better start with this one, eh?
00:53:07Get that and, er, three more, please.
00:53:14Oh, not for me, thanks.
00:53:15I'm dittery enough.
00:53:17Okay, well, I'll bring it over.
00:53:18Look, stop panicking.
00:53:19It's gonna go fine today.
00:53:20And, whatever happens, you've always got us.
00:53:24Oh, yeah, and charity, I imagine.
00:53:26Well, yeah.
00:53:27It's harder like I need my hand holding.
00:53:29Well, that's a good job, cos I just spent the last hour up to my armpits in Rancydale.
00:53:32Oh, you smell rank.
00:53:35Coming from the woman who carries sheet droppings in her pocket.
00:53:38Maybe not for much longer, eh?
00:53:40Oh, well.
00:53:41Here goes.
00:53:43Back I'm dead, sis.
00:53:44Maybe it's a last resort.
00:53:46Oi.
00:53:47You'll walk it, kid.
00:53:49Go on.
00:53:49Like throwing away six years of training.
00:53:58Look, you're bright.
00:53:59You're resourceful.
00:54:00You could turn your hand to anything.
00:54:02Look, I'm a vet.
00:54:03I make animals better.
00:54:05That's what I do.
00:54:05What about a bit of conservation work abroad?
00:54:07Broaden your experiences?
00:54:09Ship the embarrassment off to another country, you mean.
00:54:11Sorry, but I've got my son to think about.
00:54:13Well, it doesn't mean there isn't a silver lining.
00:54:15Charity's right.
00:54:15All we have to do is find it.
00:54:19Well, then I tell you what.
00:54:20Why don't I leave you lot to organise my miserable little life while I go pack for London?
00:54:26That would get quietly plastered.
00:54:32Teenie!
00:54:36Might as well face it.
00:54:38My career is kaput.
00:54:41And don't you give me that look, either.
00:54:43After tomorrow, it doesn't matter how sick you might feel, I won't be able to help you.
00:54:51And do you know why?
00:54:52Let me guess.
00:54:54You're a snake charmer.
00:54:56Well, go on, get out your funny hat, shove him in a basket, cos this I've got to see.
00:55:00Oh, that's right.
00:55:01Laugh at me.
00:55:02That's all I'm fit for.
00:55:03Oh, wow.
00:55:04Well, you weren't wrong about getting hammered.
00:55:07Hey, good job I didn't don my, er, fake moustache.
00:55:10A proper comedian, aren't we?
00:55:13Come on, then.
00:55:13Keep on coming.
00:55:14Well, how about you lighting up?
00:55:17I was just worried about you, all right?
00:55:19Well, guess what?
00:55:20I'm fine.
00:55:21What, chatting to a snake?
00:55:22How's that working out for you?
00:55:24Might as well, now I'm practically struck off.
00:55:27What have I got to lose?
00:55:29No job.
00:55:30Hardly any savings.
00:55:32You.
00:55:33Excuse me?
00:55:34Look, I know you.
00:55:36You want a good time, not some unemployed has-been with no prospects.
00:55:40Oh, get the violins out.
00:55:42Just do yourself a favour, abandon ship before I bring you down as well.
00:55:46Well, maybe you're wrong.
00:55:49OK, yeah, I'll admit, I like a giggle.
00:55:52But trust me, babe.
00:55:53You talking to a snake, that more than ticks the box.
00:55:57And I'm not going anywhere.
00:56:00So how about I help you pack?
00:56:02Because, babe, you've got a train to catch, remember?
00:56:04How could I forget?
00:56:06Well, I could always help you take your mind off it for a bit.
00:56:11Close your eyes.
00:56:11I'm not a charity.
00:56:12Please, just close your eyes.
00:56:23There.
00:56:24Now, if that doesn't float Martin's boat, nothing will.
00:56:31See?
00:56:32That's more like it.
00:56:37Hey.
00:56:38I'm just looking for Vanessa.
00:56:40She's not back yet.
00:56:42Was that good or bad?
00:56:43I don't know.
00:56:44It's not guaranteed the panel are going to accept Martin's recommendation.
00:56:48No.
00:56:48Not since you insulted his wife.
00:56:50I know.
00:56:51I need to learn to keep my trap shut.
00:56:52Yes, you do.
00:56:53And I need to know what's going on.
00:56:54Can you not ring him to see what they've decided?
00:56:56I can't.
00:56:56I've got a call-out.
00:56:57It's an alpaca emergency.
00:56:58Some fungal disease.
00:56:59But you can tag along if you want.
00:57:00Oh, no.
00:57:01You're alright.
00:57:01Yeah.
00:57:02But I've not got the right bedside manner.
00:57:03Excuse me.
00:57:04My bedside manner is legendary.
00:57:07Babe, I've been trying to ring you all morning.
00:57:09How did it go?
00:57:12I've been suspended for 12 months.
00:57:15What?
00:57:16Gross negligence.
00:57:18Apparently, I'm lucky I haven't been struck off.
00:57:20Maybe you could appeal.
00:57:27Nah, the decision's final.
00:57:29It's been posted on their website.
00:57:31Vanessa Woodfield, persona non grata.
00:57:34Why can't they see it was just an innocent mistake?
00:57:37I'll try telling Lisa that.
00:57:39What am I going to do in her job?
00:57:41I can sack Rebecca.
00:57:43Could have some shifts behind here.
00:57:45You've only just taken Rebecca on.
00:57:46Yeah, but the state of mind she's in.
00:57:47I could tell her she imagined it.
00:57:49Speak callous.
00:57:50Look, it's irrelevant anyway.
00:57:51I'm not a barmate.
00:57:52Oh, Dad, no.
00:58:07That's unfair.
00:58:09What, more unfair than making me play these ridiculous party games with ridiculous people
00:58:12I've seen naked?
00:58:14I know, that's how I reacted too.
00:58:16Not a pretty sight.
00:58:18Stop it, Charity.
00:58:19Well, you can always concede.
00:58:20I concede.
00:58:21No, she doesn't.
00:58:22Pick another name.
00:58:22His birthday.
00:58:23His rules.
00:58:25Fine.
00:58:26Well, someone pretentious, I'm guessing.
00:58:28Is that a question?
00:58:29Look, what's the point?
00:58:30She'll never get it.
00:58:32Have you ever read a book?
00:58:33Well, I'll put my time to better use, wouldn't you say, Frank?
00:58:37Charity.
00:58:39Here's a hint.
00:58:41She wrote The Secret Garden.
00:58:43Any idea?
00:58:44Right then, that's you out.
00:58:46Frances Hodgson-Binnett.
00:58:47Pow!
00:58:50Suck it, losers!
00:58:53Trace, you're ditching me on my birthday.
00:58:55We're out of line.
00:58:57I'll be back in two minutes.
00:58:59Hey, how did you know?
00:59:01I mean, not that you couldn't.
00:59:02Please stop digging yourself deeper.
00:59:05Secret Garden was...
00:59:08It just helped me.
00:59:09Out of a rough patch when I was a kid, that's all.
00:59:12Well, it took the wind out of their sails.
00:59:14I'm sure there's plenty of hot air in reserve.
00:59:17I thought I'm gonna go for a week
00:59:18and then can we just get this over with, please?
00:59:29Oi!
00:59:30Stop that, you little terror, will you?
00:59:35But you're just a little kid.
00:59:38Why would you do that?
00:59:39Why would you, you evil cow?
00:59:40You're ruining me dad's life with your sick lies.
00:59:43Now I'm gonna ruin yours.
00:59:44No, I didn't do anything, it was your dad.
00:59:49Liar!
00:59:50No, your dad!
00:59:51He admitted it, the blackmail!
00:59:53Only because you trapped him.
00:59:54No, he pleaded guilty, he did it.
00:59:57And it wasn't just me, was it?
00:59:59Why would I lie?
01:00:00Even if he did, you just don't manky tart.
01:00:02You deserved it.
01:00:02Now mum's kicked him out
01:00:05and you're trying to put him away for years.
01:00:07He's my dad.
01:00:08I can't wait to suffer just because you're a cheap prozzie.
01:00:11Oi!
01:00:11You better shut your mouth, you stupid little girl.
01:00:14Give me that.
01:00:15Your dad is a sleazy bully
01:00:19who did some horrible things to her
01:00:20when she was practically the same age as you!
01:00:23Do you think she wanted that?
01:00:25Do you think she deserved to be touched on by that, creep?
01:00:27Charity, stop it, she's a kid!
01:00:29For you!
01:00:30No, I wasn't.
01:00:31Well, she's old enough to know better!
01:00:33Okay, fine.
01:00:35It's not your fault your dad was a nasty man,
01:00:37but this is all you, isn't it?
01:00:38This is down to you.
01:00:39So go on, you better do one now.
01:00:40Go on, go!
01:00:45Charity, are you okay?
01:00:49She just doesn't get it, does she?
01:00:51Yes, she does.
01:00:54I'm the woman who's destroyed her family.
01:00:56No!
01:00:57Her dad was the one that destroyed that family, not you!
01:01:01And don't you dare
01:01:02ever think otherwise, alright?
01:01:15Oi!
01:01:24Little Miss Banksy.
01:01:25Don't even think about it.
01:01:26I wasn't.
01:01:27I thought I told you to get lost.
01:01:29You don't get it.
01:01:30My dad's a good person, he doesn't deserve this.
01:01:32She has to drop the charges.
01:01:33Well, it's not happening, so do one!
01:01:35You don't know him!
01:01:36I don't have to!
01:01:37I know his type inside out!
01:01:39He explained!
01:01:40He paid her, nobody forced us to do anything!
01:01:43No, but he filmed it without her knowing
01:01:45and used it as blackmail.
01:01:46You're lying!
01:01:46No, he's lying!
01:01:48He's lied to you your whole life
01:01:50because that is who he is.
01:01:52He's a disgusting, sick, pervert of a man
01:01:54who takes what he wants,
01:01:56throws a few quid at the damage
01:01:57and moves on.
01:01:58And finally, it's catching up with him!
01:02:02And I'm telling you this,
01:02:04he deserves every slow, miserable year
01:02:06behind bars he's got coming.
01:02:09Tell your mum to let him rot.
01:02:13Oh, hiya!
01:02:18You've just missed Vanessa,
01:02:18she's gone to drop Johnny at the Charmander's.
01:02:21Well, I came to see you, actually.
01:02:23There'll be a drink behind the bar
01:02:24waiting for you when you're done.
01:02:28Pretty sure I'll need one.
01:02:34Well?
01:02:35He got four years
01:02:36for blackmail and harassment
01:02:38on two counts.
01:02:39The other girl was there as well.
01:02:41She was amazing.
01:02:43We're gonna keep in touch.
01:02:44And the judge gave him
01:02:45a right telling off.
01:02:47That is great.
01:02:48Good for you, babe.
01:02:49Got the bubbly on ice,
01:02:50as promised.
01:02:51Oh, do you know what?
01:02:52I think I'm just gonna head on.
01:02:53I'm sorry, what?
01:02:54She's turning down free booze.
01:02:55Houston, we have a problem.
01:02:58I'm okay.
01:02:59It's a good thing.
01:03:00I wanted him put away, but...
01:03:01Well, it just stings a bit, doesn't it,
01:03:03having it all draped up again.
01:03:05Ah, yeah, you can say that again.
01:03:08What have you done and Ness?
01:03:10Our dad had to rush off
01:03:11to take Eliza to an appointment
01:03:12and then Rowan had just
01:03:14grabbed Vanessa about
01:03:15some fetters things, so...
01:03:17I'll be fine.
01:03:18Wait there, please.
01:03:20Marlon!
01:03:21You're up!
01:03:22Come on.
01:03:23It's a new home.
01:03:24And it wasn't just
01:03:28the blackmail, was it?
01:03:30It was
01:03:30the way he made me
01:03:32feel about what I did.
01:03:34Hey,
01:03:35don't give him what he wanted.
01:03:36Don't you dare.
01:03:38Jacob.
01:03:40Oh.
01:03:41Put the tally on.
01:03:42You've made the news.
01:03:44Who attempted to blackmail
01:03:46two women
01:03:46has been jailed
01:03:47for four years today.
01:03:49The conviction came
01:03:50as a result of a new initiative
01:03:51by Houghton Police
01:03:52to support vulnerable witnesses
01:03:54and crack down
01:03:55on this type of crime.
01:03:57Detective Inspector
01:03:58Mark Bales
01:03:58had this to say.
01:04:00Unfortunately,
01:04:01in recent years
01:04:01we've noticed
01:04:02an increase in these cases.
01:04:05Offenders trying
01:04:06to extort money
01:04:06by obtaining images online
01:04:08or otherwise
01:04:09that the victim
01:04:09would prefer
01:04:10to keep private.
01:04:11I hope the success
01:04:13of this investigation
01:04:14sends a message
01:04:15that we take
01:04:16these offences seriously,
01:04:18that we will prosecute
01:04:19and we'll do our utmost
01:04:20to protect anyone
01:04:21who comes forward.
01:04:22to report these crimes.
01:04:29Wow.
01:04:30That really makes
01:04:31it all seem worth it
01:04:32when he puts it like that.
01:04:35That's who handled
01:04:36the case then?
01:04:37D.I. Bales?
01:04:38Yeah.
01:04:40He's been brilliant.
01:04:41That really makes it so well.
01:04:42So that's what I'm doing.