- 6/9/2025
CBS Radio Mystery Theater (a.k.a. Radio Mystery Theater and Mystery Theater) is a radio drama series created by Himan Brown that was broadcast on CBS Radio Network affiliates from 1974 to 1982, and later in the early 2000s was repeated by the NPR satellite feed.
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00:00The CBS Radio Mystery Theater presents...
00:17Come in.
00:23Welcome.
00:25I'm E.G. Marshall.
00:26Welcome to the fear you can hear.
00:31Welcome to the world of terrifying imagination.
00:36It gives me a fiendish delight to invite you on a very unusual expedition.
00:43For in our tale to come, we are going to travel not to distant shores, not to outer space,
00:51but instead, backwards in time.
00:56Time as the archaeologist knows it.
00:59The depths of time.
01:02Strange thing about archaeology.
01:05It seeks to understand life by the study of death.
01:10Can we try to uncover the rest of the body, Professor?
01:13Of course.
01:15Jimmy, get the three or four fellows to help you, and do it carefully.
01:18There's no way of telling the body's position.
01:20Sure thing, Professor.
01:22Oh, this is awful.
01:24What are we going to do?
01:25Don't worry.
01:27Ancient bodies are your specialty.
01:29Fresh ones are mine.
01:30But how do you know it's murder?
01:32You surprise me.
01:34A suicide may dig her own grave, but you'd hardly expect her to pull the dirt in after her.
01:39Our mystery drama, Dig Me Deadly, was written especially for the Mystery Theater by S.J. Wilson
01:57and stars Louise Larrabee.
02:01It is sponsored in part by the Kellogg Company, makers of Kellogg's Special K cereal.
02:07I'll be back shortly with Act One.
02:10You and I know that death is no respecter of time.
02:27It often comes unbidden, unexpectedly, even fiercely and murderously.
02:35So, get your pith helmets, your sunglasses, your axes, shovels, and all the other paraphernalia you will need
02:45to join us in Dig Me Deadly.
02:51Young man, why aren't we on a road?
02:53Why do we have to cross the desert?
02:55Because it's the fastest way to where we're going, Detective Scrubshaw.
02:59Not Scrubshaw.
03:00Trubshaw.
03:01Trubshaw.
03:01Detective Claudia Trubshaw.
03:03And I bet your last toothpick, which I wish you'd take out of your mouth, that we're really
03:08crossing the Rocky Mountains.
03:09There in Colorado, this is Arizona.
03:12I know it's Arizona, Sheriff Wally.
03:14It's where I came to spend my vacation with my sister before you showed up with all your
03:18horn spoggling.
03:19Oh, ma'am, I did know such thing.
03:21Now, what else would you call it?
03:23I came here to get away from L.A. and all that smog and to breathe in the pure, fresh,
03:28clean air of Tucson.
03:29Now, thanks to you, I've got more sand in my mouth than the whole Sonora Desert.
03:34That's Mexico, this is Arizona.
03:36I've got news for you.
03:38It's left Mexico and settled in my lungs.
03:41Now, you mean to tell me that in the entire state of Arizona, there isn't a police officer,
03:46anybody who can cover this case, that you had to drag me into this no-woman's land?
03:51Those are my orders, ma'am.
03:52But why would my boss in Los Angeles assign me to an Arizona case?
03:57Well, I guess he knew you were in the neighborhood.
04:00That makes as much sense as kissing one of those cactuses.
04:03They're called saguaros.
04:05Now, stop changing the subject.
04:08Now, will you tell me where we are going?
04:09Like I said, west of Naco.
04:11Good for you.
04:13You have advanced to the next plateau.
04:16And why are we going there?
04:18Because that's where they're digging.
04:19Superb.
04:20Now, who are they?
04:22The kids that are digging.
04:24Wiley, did you ever have your IQ tested?
04:27Not so as I know.
04:28Well, don't.
04:29It's probably lower than Death Valley.
04:31And I know that's in California.
04:34Now, why are they digging?
04:37For dead bodies, I think.
04:39Stop this car at once.
04:41Well, what's wrong, detective?
04:44Now, I'm not riding another minute until you tell me what this is all about.
04:47What more do you want to know?
04:49Why, I'm sitting in this rolling junk heap on my way to West Naco or wherever.
04:54Well, there are these kids there.
04:56What kids?
04:57These kids from some school near L.A.
04:59Every summer they come and they dig up things.
05:01They're supposed to be real old.
05:03In other words, students working on an archaeological dig.
05:06Never could pronounce that word.
05:08Forget the pronunciation.
05:10Just try and make some sense.
05:12Well, a few days ago, I'm sitting in the sheriff's office when this here girl comes by.
05:18Excuse me.
05:22Sure, miss.
05:22Come on in.
05:24Is the sheriff here?
05:26The truth is, there is no sheriff.
05:28Then who's in charge?
05:29Well, I guess I am.
05:31Sergeant Deputy Sheriff, you could say.
05:33And name is Wiley.
05:35I'm looking for help.
05:36That's why I'm here.
05:37What can I do for you?
05:39But you're not a real sheriff.
05:41Well, I don't get paid for it, but they give me the badge.
05:45Hey, why don't you try me?
05:47I'm one of the students working at the Broadfield.
05:50The dig?
05:51Why don't you sit down?
05:52And there's some trouble there.
05:54And what kind of trouble?
05:55Well, that's just it.
05:56I can't tell exactly, but someone's following me.
06:00Wherever I go, I have the feeling someone right behind me are hiding and waiting to do something to me.
06:06Something terrible.
06:07Isn't there anyone in charge?
06:09Well, Professor Wilkerson, he says I'm imagining things.
06:14Well, now, have you ever rarely seen anyone following you?
06:18No, but only the other day someone went through my bureau and my luggage.
06:23Anything massive?
06:24No, but things were all messed up.
06:25Uh-huh.
06:26Now, what's your name?
06:27Rogers.
06:28Edith Rogers.
06:29Miss Rogers.
06:30Now, do you have any idea why somebody would be telling you or looking through your things?
06:35I think someone's trying to kill me.
06:38Kill you?
06:40Hey, that's serious.
06:41Why would anyone want to do that?
06:43Because they're afraid of me.
06:44Scared of what I could do.
06:46Well, you don't look like you could trouble a horned toad.
06:49What are they scared of?
06:51Well, you see, no.
06:53I can't tell you.
06:55If they found out I came here, they'd do it faster.
06:58Anyway, you can't help me.
07:01Maybe nobody can.
07:02Hey, wait a minute.
07:03Wait a minute.
07:04Wait there.
07:10Then what did you do?
07:12I phoned that professor, Wilkerson.
07:14Say, say, detective, can we get this thing going again?
07:18All right.
07:18But only as long as you tell me everything you know.
07:21Well, I called up that professor and I told him about it.
07:26And he said that it was the girl's first summer there and that working in the hot sun and seeing all those graves and skeletons was something she just wasn't used to.
07:35Then he said he'd take care of it and for me not to worry.
07:38Well, now, at first I thought I'd better leave well enough alone, except the whole thing just kept pecking at me.
07:46So, a couple of days later, I dropped by the Broadfield spread and was told by a girl who ruined with this Edith Rogers that she, that is to say, this Edith Rogers here, she had left.
07:56Did she say when?
07:58I didn't ask.
07:59Did she say how or why?
08:02No, and I didn't ask that either.
08:04Were her clothes and luggage gone?
08:06Gosh, I didn't think to ask that neither.
08:10Then how come you thought to ask for me?
08:12Well, I called his friend of my father's who was assistant deputy chief of police.
08:16Say no more.
08:17You called my boss, Morgan.
08:19In other words, this isn't an official assignment, is it?
08:22Well, he told me you were in Tucson and to speak to you.
08:26And dragging me through this sand heap is your idea of speaking to me.
08:32Wiley, if I admit something to you, will you promise never to tell anyone?
08:36Sure thing, detective.
08:38I know of only one person who's a bigger fool than you.
08:42Who would that be?
08:43Me.
08:50Detective Troopshaw?
08:52I'm Julian Wilkerson.
08:54One of the students tells me you'd like to see me.
08:56Only in an unofficial capacity, professor.
08:59If you can be of assistance, fine.
09:01If not, I'll understand.
09:03Well, I'll try.
09:04Professor, this is Sheriff Wiley.
09:05Oh, yes.
09:06How do you do?
09:06Hi.
09:07What's it all about?
09:09The Rogers girl.
09:10I understand she's not here any longer.
09:12Yes.
09:13I knew that girl would be more trouble than it was worth to bring her out here.
09:16Then why was she here?
09:18Oh, she was thinking of archaeology as a major.
09:21You see, she apparently comes from a difficult home.
09:24She had nothing to occupy her this summer, and the dean asked me if we could fit her in.
09:29Try to make her feel she belongs to something.
09:31A group.
09:32Apparently, it didn't work out.
09:33No.
09:34She moped a lot.
09:36Quite depressed, suspicious.
09:38Felt she wasn't wanted.
09:40I did everything I could.
09:41I got two of the nicest girls to room with her.
09:43Now, who are they?
09:45Oh, Jeanine Boulanger, a French exchange student.
09:48Specializes in atomic physics.
09:50And Susan Maythrop, a straight-A student.
09:53Very outgoing, very bright.
09:55Were there any young men?
09:58Yes.
09:59I didn't like doing it, but I got Jimmy Trumbull to spend some of his free time with her.
10:04He's our prize.
10:05He's a brilliant fellow.
10:06We call him our Libby.
10:08Libby?
10:08Well, now, that's a girl's name, eh?
10:11Wiley, you're famous for not asking questions.
10:14Why not live up to your reputation?
10:16Professor Libby developed the carbon-14 dating system.
10:20Oh, he did, did he?
10:22Yes.
10:23Anyway, Edith didn't take to the work or do anyone.
10:28It's no surprise that she just dropped out.
10:30Are her belongings still here?
10:32Well, I wouldn't know, but Susan would.
10:35She's in the specimen shed next door.
10:37Let me call her.
10:38Sue?
10:39Sue Lathrop?
10:40Yes?
10:41Yes, Professor?
10:42Well, can you come to my office for a minute?
10:44Wiley, why don't you do something constructive, like seeing if you can get me something to wash down this sandstorm I swallowed?
10:51Thanks to you.
10:52Sure thing.
10:53Detective, anything special?
10:54Just something soft, wet, and cold, please.
10:58I'll be back in a minute.
11:00Oh, sorry, miss, I didn't mean to not...
11:02Oh, that's all right.
11:04Susan, I'd like you to meet Detective Cloupshaw.
11:07A detective?
11:08From the police?
11:09Yes, but not on official business.
11:12What for, then?
11:13I was wondering if Edith Rogers' belongings were still in her room.
11:16Oh, Edith.
11:17Oh, no.
11:18She took everything when she left.
11:20When was that?
11:21Oh, about four or maybe five days ago.
11:24I'm not sure.
11:25Do you have any idea why she left?
11:27Not really.
11:28She...
11:29She didn't tell anyone she was going, but then...
11:32She just didn't get...
11:33Well, what can I say?
11:36Susan's trying to be discreet.
11:37The fact is the girl just didn't belong.
11:40Did anyone notify her family?
11:42I know I didn't.
11:43We just assumed that she hitchhiked her way home,
11:45or perhaps to one of the youth communes around here.
11:49Then, at this point, we don't know if she left or disappeared.
11:53But what would make you think she disappeared?
11:56She went for help to what's supposed to be the local sheriff's office.
12:00She was frightened, thought she was being followed,
12:02that someone wanted to kill her.
12:04That's just like her.
12:05She was so silly, so romantic,
12:08always making up stories where so-and-so loved her madly,
12:11and so-and-so was terribly jealous of her.
12:14And, of course, she was always at the top of the trying.
12:16Uh, I suppose we could phone her home and see if she got there.
12:21You're a fool!
12:21You're a stupid idiot fool!
12:23Well, there's no call to get yourself all heated up.
12:27It's just an old arrowhead.
12:28Besides this radioactive area, do nothing to us.
12:31Sounds like Wiley tried to get me a bottle of Atomic Soda Pop.
12:34Oh, that's Shaneen.
12:35Let's, uh, see what the fuss is about.
12:39Now what, Wiley?
12:40Well, it beats me.
12:41I just picked up this here arrowhead in that shed,
12:43and she comes down on me like an eagle on a stray lane.
12:47That is not an arrowhead, young fella.
12:49Uh, it's a spear point that happens to be about 12,000 years old.
12:54Trouble is, it's recently been through carbon-14 dating.
12:56That?
12:57Yes, and it may still be hot.
13:00Like an atom bomb.
13:01Hopefully, Wiley.
13:02You'll go up in a mushroom any minute.
13:05Oh, Professor, I am so sorry.
13:07Uh-huh.
13:08Wiley, just give that arrowhead to Shaneen.
13:10She's wearing protective gloves.
13:12And then follow her.
13:13She'll take you to the decontamination room.
13:15You'll probably be all right.
13:16Don't look so worried, Wiley.
13:18There's no chance of it affecting your brains.
13:20You sure now, Detective?
13:22Absolutely.
13:23Follow me, you girls.
13:25Quickly!
13:25So that stone point is 12,000 years old.
13:30Yes.
13:31Well, that's as close as we can get within the margins given by C-14.
13:35But Jimmy is now working with radioactive potassium,
13:39which can give us an earlier reading.
13:41I thought 10,000 to 15,000 was about the earliest records we have of men on this continent.
13:46Well, we've got some surprises in store.
13:49Not only for you, Detective, but for the world.
13:52Really?
13:53Care to give me a clue?
13:53I already have.
13:55I filed that one away.
13:57Which one?
13:58With C-14, you can date back some 50,000 years.
14:02But with potassium, it went back to at least one million years.
14:06Right?
14:07Yes.
14:08That was the clue.
14:09Interesting.
14:10What are you hoping for?
14:12It's no longer a hope, Detective.
14:14But you'll have to be patient and wait until we release our reports.
14:20What's that all about?
14:21I don't know.
14:22The kids seem to be heading for the northwestern bridge.
14:25I've got to go.
14:26I'll bet it's Wiley again.
14:27Nothing like this has happened before.
14:29Nothing like Wiley has happened before.
14:30Susan?
14:31Susan, do you know what's happening?
14:32No, Professor.
14:34But it's something exciting.
14:35Maybe a new find.
14:36I hope they didn't have to dig as much sand as I've got in my shoes.
14:40I'll catch up with you.
14:40Hi, Detective.
14:41Aren't you coming?
14:42Someone screamed.
14:44Wiley, where have you been?
14:45I've been in that shed with that French refrigerator.
14:47I need your shoulder.
14:48What's wrong?
14:49To lean on so I can get the Sahara out of my shoes.
14:51Okay, but you better hurry.
14:53Wiley.
14:54Hmm?
14:54No matter what has happened up there, you've got to do something for me.
14:57What's that?
14:57In that shed.
14:58Can you remember what you saw there?
15:00Pretty much.
15:00Then listen carefully.
15:07Oh, boy, dear.
15:09It's a woman's hand.
15:10And I know whose it is.
15:12By the ring.
15:13The silver band.
15:15Well, whose is it?
15:16Edith Rogers.
15:18Oh.
15:19All right.
15:19No one touch anything until Detective Troopshaw gets here.
15:22A detective?
15:23A lady detective.
15:24Yes.
15:25Okay, kids.
15:26One detective coming up.
15:27Let me through.
15:28All right.
15:29Yes, yes, yes, yes.
15:30Cut the detective through, please.
15:31Well, from the looks of it, here is a lady who definitely needs a hand.
15:37Who found her?
15:38I did.
15:39And who are you?
15:40James Trumbull.
15:41I told you about him, remember?
15:43Oh, yes.
15:44You're Libby, as you call him.
15:45Yes.
15:46But there doesn't seem to be any digging around here.
15:50Is this the way you found her?
15:52Just one hand sticking out of the sand?
15:55No.
15:55I was on my way to the datum point to figure out what the next grid would be.
15:59When I passed this place and noticed that someone had been digging around here.
16:03The sand wasn't as flat as the surrounding area and not as compact.
16:07So I began to brush away the top layer until I uncovered this one hand.
16:13Professor, have I your permission to supervise this matter until I get official regulations?
16:18Yes, of course.
16:18Thanks.
16:19Has anyone been able to identify the hand?
16:23Susan, she said it is Edith Rogers.
16:26What makes you think that?
16:27The silver band.
16:28I was with her when she bought it in town a couple of weeks ago.
16:31She bought a silver wedding band?
16:33I asked her why and she said she expected to be married very soon.
16:37It just sounded like one of her crazy stories, so I forgot about it.
16:41I see.
16:42Well, rings have been known to change fingers.
16:45Can we try and uncover the rest of the body?
16:47Of course.
16:48Jimmy, get three or four fellows to help you.
16:50Do it carefully, please.
16:51There's no way of telling the body's position.
16:53Sure thing, Professor.
16:55Oh, this is awful.
16:57What are we going to do?
16:58Don't worry, Professor.
17:00Ancient bodies are your specialty.
17:02Fresh ones are mine.
17:03Yes, but this is liable to stop our work.
17:05This place will be crawling with police, newsmen, television crews, what all.
17:09Really?
17:10Why?
17:11Isn't murder a little too common to rate that kind of attention?
17:14But how do you know it is murder?
17:16Miss Lathrop, you surprise me.
17:18A suicide may dig her own grave, but you'd hardly expect her to pull the dirt in after her.
17:24It's very shallow, Professor.
17:26I don't think we should use shovels.
17:28Shall we use the brushes from here?
17:29Sure, but let's get a move on, eh?
17:31Ah!
17:33Look!
17:33Look!
17:34The hand!
17:35It's attached only to bones, to a skeleton!
17:39Oh, no, I've never seen it!
17:40Oh, now, now, will you all stop crowding?
17:42You'd think this was a Hollywood opening.
17:44Oh, Janine is right.
17:46There is no body.
17:48The hands are attached to a skeleton.
17:58Fully fleshed hands attached to a body that is nothing more than bones.
18:03A skeleton.
18:04A skeleton.
18:07You know, Mother Earth is very miserly about giving up her secrets.
18:12But, little by little, man has dug them out of her.
18:16But never before has there been this kind of puzzle, in which the hands belong to the present, and the body to the past.
18:27We'll be back shortly with Act Two.
18:29We return to our dilemma.
18:44The question is, what is a bunch of young, bright college students going to do about a body that has fully fleshed hands attached to the bones of a skeleton?
18:57And what is our lady detective, Claudia Troopshaw, going to do with this seemingly improbable corpse?
19:06Yes, Captain.
19:08You've got to tell me under whose jurisdiction this case belongs.
19:11No, there is no local police department.
19:17The hands may be the Roger girls, but the body, where do you get this?
19:22It's a skeleton.
19:23And the professor tells me it's over two and a half thousand years old.
19:30Stop yelling.
19:31I know it sounds crazy, but they just did a C-14 test on one of the bones.
19:34And that's the result.
19:36Two and a half thousand years old.
19:41But not the hands.
19:44Whose case is it, I want to know?
19:46Mine?
19:48Why mine?
19:50Well, will you get in touch with the FBI at once?
19:54No, I can't use anyone here to help me that's already here.
19:58Why not?
19:59Because they're all under suspicion.
20:01That's why not.
20:03Lunkhead.
20:04It's nice of you, Miss Boulanger, to take time off to have this little talk with me.
20:14Professor Wilkerson said I should answer all your questions to the best that I can.
20:19Do you always do what Professor Wilkerson asks?
20:22Oh, yes.
20:22He is a marvelous man.
20:24He is so brilliant.
20:26I'm sure.
20:27Tell me, do you have many friends among the other students?
20:30I don't think so.
20:31Not even Jimmy Trumbull?
20:32Oh, he is nice, but he is such a little boy.
20:36And the others?
20:38I am afraid they're all too jealous.
20:40Do you know why?
20:41Oh, they think that the professor treats me like a favorite.
20:45Well, does he?
20:46Of course not.
20:48But I have studied all this and done it in France before, so I know it very well.
20:53And they do not.
20:54I think I understand.
20:57This body we found, you've seen it?
21:00I could not bear to look.
21:02Oh, but you did.
21:04Now tell me, in all your work, both here and in France, have you ever seen anything like it?
21:09No, absolutely not.
21:12And you couldn't explain how two perfectly fleshed hands could be attached to a prehistoric skeleton?
21:16Well, it's against all possibilities.
21:20What did you think of Edith Rogers?
21:24She was very unfortunate.
21:26In what way?
21:27Oh, she so badly needed some kind of an attachment.
21:31With a boy, I mean.
21:33And I think she almost found it.
21:35But then that Susan Lathrop got in the way and kept it from happening.
21:39How do you mean?
21:40Oh, I don't like talking gossip.
21:42But Edith Rogers liked very much this Jimmy Trumbull.
21:45But that Susan who blows hot one day and calls the next makes up her mind that Jimmy is her property.
21:52And she says to that Rogers girl, she should stay off her property.
21:56Anything else, Janine?
21:58No.
21:59That is all.
22:02You've been very helpful.
22:03Come on in.
22:11Oh, hello, Jimmy.
22:12Hello, Detective Troupshaw.
22:14Professor Wilkerson says you want to see me.
22:16I have just a few questions that may or may not help clear up some of your problems.
22:21My problems?
22:22No, not yours personally, but the outfit.
22:25But where's the problem?
22:27Well, if those hands belong to Edith Rogers, it means she's dead.
22:31And that, I'd call a problem.
22:34This whole thing's crazy.
22:35It's some kind of gag.
22:36I mean, it's not possible for a skeleton of someone who's been dead for over 2,000 years
22:41to have the hands of someone who was alive a week ago or less.
22:44Did you see Edith Rogers about a week ago?
22:47Yes, ma'am.
22:48I understood you were one of the very few who was sort of interested in Edith Rogers.
22:54Well, I was sorry for her.
22:56She was lonely and frightened.
22:58Did any of the others talk to you about her?
23:00No, but Edith had a lot to say about us.
23:03Can you give me some idea?
23:05Edith thought Susan was a fake, that Janine was phony, and the rest of us pretty silly
23:10digging away in over 100 degrees temperature.
23:13She just didn't understand why we were doing it.
23:15Didn't that make you wonder what she was doing here?
23:18Oh, sure.
23:19But she was lonely and she would have done anything to be anywhere.
23:23Oh, say, I almost forgot.
23:25Something funny happened this morning, and I meant to tell you about it, but with all
23:29the rumors and gossip, well, it just slipped my mind.
23:31What was it?
23:32On my way to the grid we're working on, I ran into this Indian, a really strange guy.
23:37He was dressed in some weird Mexican costume and had long drooping mustaches.
23:42And he asked me in this queer accent if I knew where Minnehaha was buried.
23:47Minnehaha?
23:48Was he kidding?
23:49Who knows?
23:51When I told him I didn't know, he became very sad.
23:54And he said his name was Tepexpan, and that his wife had died 10,000 years ago.
24:00Tepexpan, no less.
24:01The name's sort of familiar.
24:03Oh, come on, Jimmy.
24:05Even I know that for years the Tepexpan man was considered the earliest specimen of man
24:10found in the United States.
24:11Oh, of course.
24:13What else did he say?
24:14Now, let's see.
24:15Oh, I wrote it down here.
24:17Here it is.
24:17He said, she who seeks shall find the answers in her mind if she can find the man that is
24:24called Tepexpan.
24:25You're putting me on.
24:26No, I'm not, honestly.
24:28And Denny said that she would find the star of Tepexpan in the south of Tuxpan.
24:32Can I have that paper, Jimmy?
24:34Of course.
24:35Thanks.
24:37Tepexpan my foot.
24:39Wiley must be a genius to be able to drive this Kidney Buster.
24:50I could just about manage to keep the wheels straight.
24:53Now, where am I?
24:56Tepexpan, Tepexpan.
24:57Ah, here it is.
24:59Tepexpan Avenue.
25:00Now, turn south.
25:02How am I supposed to find the building?
25:05The star of Tepexpan.
25:07Ah, lo and behold, a building with a star over the door.
25:10Enter in peace, all ancient squaw.
25:26I'll fix that one's tape, Tepex.
25:30I was told you've been to the ancient burial ground.
25:34You have been told well.
25:35I go to see my wife.
25:37Is she one of the workers of the day?
25:40Oh, no.
25:40She toils no more.
25:42Your people toil for her.
25:45Hit me with that one again.
25:47She has been dead for over 10,000 years.
25:51I thought it was 2,500.
25:54Ah, but what's a few years in a romance that's lasted that long, right?
25:58Her spirit gives me many answers to my prayers.
26:01Do the answers to mine happen to be among them?
26:04Well, if you open the pouch, I will place a magic message within.
26:10Gracias, senor.
26:11It is by the will of the gods that I obey.
26:16Incidentally, senor Tepexpan, the next time you speak to the spirits of the gods,
26:20find out the name in Indian for fruitcake.
26:24As ancient squaw commands.
26:26And take that silly toothpick out of your face.
26:29Who's there?
26:38Shirley Holmes.
26:39Who?
26:42Oh, it's you, detective.
26:44I was just being cute, Miss Lathrop.
26:46Shirley, Sherlock Holmes, get it?
26:49What's there to get cute about?
26:50I see you're packing.
26:52I'm leaving.
26:53I'm sorry, Miss Lathrop, but you're not going anywhere.
26:57Why not?
26:57Because everyone stays put, until I get the answers to a thing or two.
27:02Such as?
27:03If the body we found yesterday was Edith Rogers...
27:06I told you, it has to be Edith.
27:08They are her hands.
27:10Attached to a prehistoric skeleton.
27:12I don't care what the radiocarbon dating says.
27:15I was with her when she bought that wedding band.
27:17She didn't say anything about when she planned to get married.
27:21No.
27:22And you didn't ask?
27:23I thought she was clowning.
27:25So she impressed you as the sort of person who would clown about getting married.
27:29I guess she wasn't old-fashioned enough to be serious about it.
27:33But most of the girls here aren't into things like getting married.
27:36We don't have such hang-ups.
27:38And Edith Rogers was a square.
27:41Very square.
27:42You must have found it a bore to room with her.
27:44Frankly, she was a bit of a drag.
27:47How did Janine get along with her?
27:49They hardly spoke to each other.
27:50Because of Wilkerson?
27:51Um, how did you know?
27:54Do you think either of them got anywhere with him?
27:57Janine was making points.
27:59Not that she's so hot.
28:00But her father's an important politician in France.
28:03And Wilkerson is impressed by that sort of thing.
28:06Ambitious, eh?
28:07Even at his age.
28:09Oh, come on, Miss Lathrop.
28:10He's not that old.
28:12Old enough to have a son who's in college.
28:14As a matter of fact, it was good old Edith Rogers who told me that.
28:18Did she tell you anything else?
28:19Nothing important.
28:21Have you ever seen anything like that body before?
28:24Never.
28:24Think hard.
28:26Maybe an experiment done on an animal in a lab?
28:29Or in the dating shed?
28:31No.
28:32And besides, I'm not allowed in the shed.
28:34Why not?
28:35I don't get to work on dating until next term.
28:37Oh, I guess I'll have to take my own advanced course with Professor Wilkerson.
28:41Oh!
28:42Oh!
28:43Help!
28:44Help!
28:44That's Janine!
28:46I was waiting for the second moccasin to drop.
28:49Let's go.
28:58It is written in the book of Proverbs, and wisely, I believe, that whoso diggeth a pit
29:06shall fall therein.
29:09Our problem is that all our characters are diggers in pits.
29:14Even our ardent detective, Claudia Trubshaw, has been digging through level after level, but
29:21getting seemingly nowhere.
29:23I'll be back shortly with Act Three.
29:26Do you realize that the gunshot we heard at the end of the second act was the first time
29:43anyone has used a conventional weapon in our story?
29:46Well, gunshots may not only be used to signify someone's end, they may also be fired to start
29:55something.
29:57Isn't that typical of a woman?
29:59She calls for help but doesn't bother to tell where she needs it.
30:02It sounded far away.
30:03Maybe from the northern grid section.
30:05You mean where the body was found?
30:06Yes.
30:07What could anyone be doing out there?
30:09Looking for clues?
30:10Maybe hiding.
30:11Well, why didn't I think of that?
30:14There's our man.
30:15You mean Professor Wilkerson?
30:17Yes.
30:17Hey, Professor.
30:18There's a detective over here.
30:20There he is.
30:20He turned on his flash.
30:22Professor, hold it a minute.
30:23Let me catch my breath.
30:25Did you hear Janine call?
30:26No, I was covering grid S-42.
30:28We were working late there.
30:30Are you sure with Janine?
30:31Pretty much, unless someone's imitating her accent.
30:34We don't know from where she called.
30:35I think it came from that north grid.
30:37First, we heard what may have been a gunshot.
30:39And then we heard LaBelle Janine calling for help.
30:42Hey, has everyone around here gone bananas?
30:44They say they heard a gunshot.
30:46Detective Troopshaw says Janine cried for help.
30:48And where were you, Mr. Trumbull?
30:50In the barracks, doing some research.
30:52Well, anyway, the detective thinks that Janine is locked in somewhere.
30:55How about the lab shed?
30:57I think you're in the tank.
30:58Come on.
31:00Who has the key to the shed?
31:01I do, but you'll have to wait out here.
31:03What for?
31:04I'll have to go in first to check on possible radioactivity inside.
31:07Just one second, Professor.
31:09Janine?
31:10Janine, are you in there?
31:12Yes, I am.
31:14I am.
31:15Is it safe for us to come in?
31:17Yes.
31:18It is very safe.
31:19All right, I've got my key here on the mugger.
31:24Professor.
31:28That girl faints easier than I can think.
31:30Janine.
31:32Janine, are you all right?
31:32Don't ask her.
31:33She'll say no.
31:35Get her back inside.
31:36Now, for the rest of you, please, stay out here.
31:39Don't go anywhere.
31:40Anyone.
31:42Still planning to leave, Susan?
31:44She wouldn't let me.
31:45Besides, what difference would it make to you if I did?
31:49I'm just being friendly.
31:51Isn't it a little too late?
31:54What do you mean?
31:54Well, now that Edith Rogers is dead, do you think I'd be waiting around to catch you on the rebound?
32:01Look, I was just being kind to her.
32:04Kind?
32:05Isn't there a phrase about someone being killed with kindness?
32:09What are you getting at?
32:10Now, listen, James Trumbull.
32:11Because Edith Rogers was a fool doesn't mean all girls are.
32:15Well, no one ever said you were.
32:18Look, the only reason I took her out a couple of times was because the professor asked me to.
32:23Aren't you the obedient student?
32:26What professors say, Jimmy, do.
32:29I don't know how else I can convince you.
32:31You can't.
32:32And if I were you, I wouldn't try.
32:35Look, you can count on my being fair and keeping quiet.
32:38I'm not out for revenge.
32:40But I'm also not about to stick my neck out for anyone, including you.
32:44I still don't know what you're getting at.
32:46I'm getting at who killed Edith Rogers.
32:54I don't know why it is, Professor,
32:56but I've never seen a woman in a faint whose legs didn't look lousy.
33:00Oh.
33:02What happened?
33:03That did it.
33:05It always does.
33:06Janine.
33:07Janine.
33:08I don't want to interrupt,
33:10but like a good archaeologist,
33:11would someone please get to the bones of the matter?
33:14I am speaking as fast as I knew.
33:18I heard a noise at the window.
33:20What kind of noise?
33:21The window was opening.
33:22Wasn't it locked?
33:23It's always locked.
33:24So I went to see what could be happening,
33:27and already there was this man climbing inside.
33:31What was he like?
33:32He was an old Indian man with long moustaches.
33:35I told him to get out,
33:36that he was dangerous to be here.
33:38And then?
33:39He would not say anything,
33:40but stood there.
33:41So I run back to the lab room where I have my pistol.
33:44And when I returned,
33:45I found him in the specimen room.
33:47He had a leather bag tied around his waist.
33:49It was open.
33:50Did you see him put anything in it?
33:52No, but I held up the pistol and told him I would shoot
33:55if he didn't put back whatever he took.
33:58So he put his hand in the bag
33:59and took something out and threw it in my eyes.
34:02Then I pressed the pistol.
34:05What did he throw?
34:06Little things.
34:07I don't know.
34:08Let's take a look.
34:09All right.
34:10Now, wait, wait, wait.
34:12Here on the floor.
34:14It's thin slivers.
34:15It's maybe wood.
34:16Let's take a closer look.
34:17No, no, no.
34:18No, no.
34:18Don't touch them.
34:19For heaven's sakes, why not?
34:20They may be hot.
34:21I'll get the counter.
34:23Is anything missing, Miss Boulanger?
34:25I have not looked.
34:26Well, do that little thing.
34:28And, Miss Boulanger,
34:30the next time you find that you're stuck in here,
34:33just open the lock and walk out.
34:36Okay, folks.
34:46Time has come to stop playing games.
34:48What kind of games?
34:50The game where one hand washes the other.
34:54Now, since you've got seniority, Professor,
34:56we'll start with you.
34:58What kind of a game could I possibly be playing?
35:01Well, as a professor, you're a great show.
35:03As a poker player, you're stupid.
35:05Oh, really?
35:05You don't know how to bluff.
35:08Remember how you insisted that spear point
35:10Wiley took from the shed had to be radioactive?
35:12Well, you were lying.
35:14How dare you?
35:15When it comes to the truth, Professor,
35:17I'm very daring.
35:19That spear point was in perfect condition.
35:22If it had been dated,
35:24a piece of it would have had to be missing.
35:27How could you know that?
35:29What do you think they teach us at the police academy?
35:31Home economics?
35:32Now, putting it simply,
35:36the less carbon-14 in an object,
35:38the older it is, right?
35:40That is correct.
35:41And the older, the more valuable.
35:42Sure, that's what we're here for,
35:44to find evidence leading back
35:45to the first human being in America.
35:47And when you can't find it,
35:49well, then you can fake it, can't you?
35:52What do you mean, Detective?
35:54There's no dating equipment in that shed.
35:56You are preposterous.
35:59Wait till you hear how preposterous I really am.
36:02Only two people have been allowed in that shed.
36:05You and Miss Boulanger.
36:07Yes, those are the rules.
36:09Well, a certain friend of mine broke those rules.
36:13Signor, to Peck's pen, if you please.
36:16Hey, Miss Boulanger, how about that?
36:21Now, if you'll just get rid of those tired handlebars
36:24from under your nose.
36:25Glad to.
36:26They sure it.
36:28Wiley.
36:29They're serious.
36:31The one who asked me questions about you.
36:32Right.
36:33And he got into that shed not to take things,
36:36but to return them.
36:37Didn't you, Wiley?
36:38I sure did.
36:40But, uh, what did you take that had to be put back?
36:43That old spear point and the nozzle on that machine.
36:46The head?
36:47The bombarding head?
36:48And I took them both to Tucson
36:50to have the experts there take a look at them.
36:52And they confirmed my best suspicions.
36:55Professor Wilkerson,
36:57you and Miss Boulanger were faking your specimens,
37:00making them older.
37:01That's one accusation I won't buy.
37:03You can always return it for credit
37:05when I open that department.
37:08Meanwhile, you were bombarding those specimens
37:10repeatedly, trying to get them to date
37:12more than 50,000 years.
37:14Professor, did you do that?
37:17I just can't believe it.
37:18Why not, Trumbull?
37:20You invented the machine.
37:21Well, only by accident.
37:22It was a fluke.
37:24And you told your esteemed professor
37:26about that fluke,
37:27and he told you to keep it under wraps.
37:30Yes, I did keep it under wraps.
37:31I never wrote a paper.
37:33Well, how did they know about it in Tucson?
37:35Well, I sent them a report,
37:36but only for their opinion.
37:38Trumbull, you're a damn fool.
37:40You know, Professor,
37:42you're just plain not nice.
37:44Here we girls spend fortunes
37:46trying to keep young
37:47while you try to make a fortune aging us.
37:50Which brings me to Edith Rogers.
37:54Of those present,
37:56only Wilkerson, Trumbull,
37:57and Miss Boulanger
37:58knew how to operate that machine.
38:00No, they ought to be arrested at once.
38:03You'd like that, Miss Lathrop, wouldn't you?
38:04Well, it leaves your hands clean, so to speak.
38:08Now, listen to Tapium.
38:09I had no reason...
38:10Getting her pregnant
38:11and being blackmailed to marry her
38:13isn't a reason?
38:15Come off, Professor.
38:17He did?
38:18The Professor?
38:19Surprised, aren't you, Miss Lathrop?
38:21But why...
38:22Why would I want to hurt that Edith Rogers?
38:25You knew she had something on the Professor,
38:28else she wouldn't have been here.
38:30But when you heard about the wedding ring,
38:32you thought you just might lose
38:34not only your Professor,
38:35but more importantly,
38:36that machine.
38:38I'm sorry.
38:38What's going on here?
38:39I'm all along.
38:40So am I, Trumbull,
38:41when it comes to you.
38:43I can't figure what you had to do with all this.
38:46He may not be that innocent.
38:47He did try and make time with Edith Rogers
38:49until she dumped him.
38:51That's not true, Susan.
38:53You're calling me a liar?
38:56I think you and your two pals
38:57are all to blame for that girl's death.
39:00You all deserve to be murdered.
39:02And this time, Miss Lathrop,
39:04you'd do it properly, wouldn't you?
39:06What are you talking about?
39:08Trumbull,
39:08did you ever tell Susan here about the machine?
39:11Well, yes, sort of,
39:13but not how to work it.
39:14I hadn't finished it then.
39:15But she was smart enough
39:16to know how it could be used.
39:18You're just guessing.
39:19True.
39:20But then came the monkey wrench.
39:23Trumbull began dating Edith Rogers.
39:25I didn't care.
39:26Not until she bought that wedding band.
39:29Now, why would that girl buy her own ring?
39:32You know why.
39:33Because no woman would go to a doctor
39:35for that kind of an examination
39:37without the necessary decoration on her finger.
39:39What's that to do with me?
39:40While Janine thought it was the professor,
39:43you thought it was Jimmy Trumbull
39:44who might be the father.
39:45First, you threatened Edith Rogers.
39:49But when Jimmy tried seeing her again,
39:51you took no chances of ever losing that machine,
39:53and you just removed her from the scene.
39:56You're crazy.
39:57Not crazy enough to use a machine
39:59I knew nothing about,
40:01because that's what you did.
40:02You know, your biggest mistake
40:04was in tying Edith Rogers' hands over her head
40:06before opening that machine full blast.
40:08Those hands were protected
40:10by the lead shield over her head.
40:13Of course.
40:13Only the lead shield could have saved those hands,
40:16kept them from dating back.
40:18The result?
40:19A 2,500-year-old skeleton
40:21with Edith Rogers' hands.
40:24Okay, detective.
40:25Who saw me?
40:26Where's your proof?
40:28Yours were the only fingerprints
40:30found on the bombarding head
40:32Wiley took to Tucson.
40:34Susan,
40:34you didn't work that machine
40:36without gloves,
40:37without protection.
40:38Why?
40:39What's wrong with that?
40:40Oh, good Lord.
40:42You didn't.
40:43What are you saying?
40:44Oh, no.
40:46Your body's probably got
40:47more than 600 radioactive units
40:49in it right now.
40:50You're...
40:51You're trying to scare me.
40:53It's not true.
40:54Susan,
40:55400 units are fatal.
40:58Help me.
40:59Someone help me.
41:01Or I die.
41:03Help me.
41:06Help.
41:09Help.
41:20Obviously,
41:21Miss Susan Lathrop
41:23got a dose
41:24of the same medicine
41:25she gave Edith Rogers.
41:28Except in her case,
41:29its effects will be
41:30much slower
41:32and very much
41:34more painful.
41:36Sad.
41:38Very sad.
41:40But,
41:41it will save the state
41:43a great deal of money.
41:46I'll be back shortly.
41:47Here's a little thought
42:00to take to sleep with you.
42:02Never indulge in excesses.
42:05Eat moderately,
42:07drink moderately,
42:09and murder moderately.
42:11Our cast included
42:14Louise Larrabee,
42:15Mason Adams,
42:16Ralph Bell,
42:18Corrine Orr,
42:19Ann Costello,
42:20and Christopher Tabori.
42:22The entire production
42:23was under the direction
42:24of Hyman Brown.
42:27Now,
42:28a preview
42:29of our next tale.
42:31I saw the glowing tips
42:32of two flip cigarettes,
42:34and then...
42:34Kiss me, Richard.
42:36I'm crazy about you.
42:38Stop it!
42:39Stop it!
42:40Tom!
42:41What are you...
42:41Marianne, go inside.
42:43Go inside, I tell you.
42:43Now, wait a minute.
42:44Why?
42:44If you have anything to say,
42:45you can say it here
42:46in front of Richard.
42:47Go inside!
42:48Let go of my arm!
42:49Now, listen,
42:49you leave her alone.
42:50Let go of her!
42:51He broke my grip on her arm
42:53and pushed me away.
42:55This shove
42:56made me slip to my knee.
42:57I came up swinging
42:58at his legs.
42:59I missed.
43:00He pinned my arms
43:01from behind.
43:01I know, Richard.
43:02What's the matter with you?
43:03Are you crazy?
43:04I broke out of his grip,
43:07stepped back from him,
43:08and fell across the shovel.
43:10I grabbed the handle,
43:12jumped up.
43:12No!
43:13No!
43:14And swung at Emory.
43:15Too late for me
43:16to stop the swing.
43:17No!
43:18As she rushed in between us,
43:19the sharp edge of the shovel
43:20hit her in the back of a head.
43:23I stood there,
43:26holding the shovel,
43:28unable to move.
43:29Radio Mystery Theater
43:30was sponsored in part
43:31by Anheuser-Busch Incorporated.
43:33Brewers of Budweiser.
43:36This is E.G. Marshall
43:37inviting you
43:38to return to our mystery theater
43:40for another adventure
43:42in the macabre.
43:44Until next time,
43:47pleasant dreams.
Recommended
42:50
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