- 6/1/2025
S02E04 >>> https://dai.ly/x9kl2we
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TVTranscript
00:00What are you guys looking at?
00:14I wonder if they'll have their own sweet Jane.
00:16I think she's a Eve Life exclusive.
00:18Do you think that Eve Life is just for angry old women?
00:21Angry old white women?
00:23Sorry, Evelyn.
00:24Just make sure you include some notes from your man.
00:27It's important to get the male perspective.
00:28Is it?
00:30Oh, Margaret, it's lovely to see you again.
00:32Yes, enchante. It's a pleasure.
00:34Do you want my investment?
00:35I'm not going to use Eve Life to shame women for their choices.
00:39I'm just not going to. That's not what we do here.
00:41Maybe we did waste each other's time.
00:44Yeah, I'm Erica. I'm the librarian at his school.
00:47Sorry, I thought this was John's night.
00:49Yes, still not following.
00:51He hasn't told you.
00:53I will give him a call.
00:58From the north to the south to the east to the west
01:01Come on, everybody go off and go off
01:03I said it's not where you're from, it's where you're at
01:05Straighten up a bit.
01:07Mom!
01:08Sorry.
01:09It's good, it's good.
01:10Doing well.
01:12How's Vivian?
01:14She's good.
01:14Do you know much about how the engine works?
01:20Not really, no.
01:21You have to warm it up a bit.
01:25You have to know when to speed up, to pull back.
01:30Don't look at me, look at the road.
01:32Fuck!
01:33Can I get a proper lesson, please? My test is next week.
01:36I'm a very good teacher, Alex, and I would really like to be able to talk to you openly about engines.
01:41Can we please change the subject?
01:44Okay.
01:47How's your father?
01:49He's happy?
01:50He seems happy enough.
01:51More than usual.
01:53Is Erica around much?
01:54I can't believe I'm saying this, but can you get your mind off sex and focus on safety?
02:00Watch out, Lycrux.
02:01Lycrux.
02:03You have to watch those ones.
02:05Idiots.
02:07Just make sure you always wear a seatbelt, okay?
02:10Okay, Mom.
02:10And if you burst a tyre in the middle of it, there's a pill for that.
02:22Very juvenile.
02:24Your jealousy?
02:25No, this ball.
02:26Actually, all your props.
02:28Making me take my shoes off.
02:30So I'm grounded to the earth.
02:32Honestly, if I knew you were so new age, I wouldn't...
02:34I'm middle-aged.
02:35I'm not new age.
02:36Keep bouncing.
02:37I'm feeling very confused.
02:42I have all these feelings about John dating and I just don't have time for it.
02:47What's confusing?
02:47Well, we've split up.
02:51He's signed divorce papers.
02:53We live apart.
02:54I mean, why am I so bothered by it?
03:00What do you think?
03:01I think you'd pay me to sit here and generate intelligent thoughts, which I do, by the way.
03:07Lots of them.
03:11I think it's the finality of it all.
03:18Evelyn, what would you say if I told you that he might not love you anymore?
03:22I'd be devastated.
03:27Betrayed.
03:28And hurt.
03:30Well, do you want to get back together?
03:32God, no.
03:34Well, let's frame his moving on as a positive then.
03:44He deserves to be happy.
03:48Do you deserve to be happy?
03:52Time's up.
04:01We need some life around here.
04:03We're subleasing to a tech firm.
04:04What space?
04:05That space down the back where they're taking the fistful.
04:08No, what tech space?
04:10Oh, I don't know.
04:11Something to do with digital cash.
04:13And when I say firm, I mean startup.
04:15Where did you find them?
04:17Peter.
04:17What are they paying?
04:19In real cash?
04:19Oh, yes.
04:21We would need to decide that.
04:23Whose bike is this?
04:25Oh, I'm bike.
04:27Paul Bowen bike.
04:29Paul Bowen Clark.
04:30That's my bike.
04:32I'm going to let you keep working on that.
04:33Yep.
04:34Can you move it, buddy?
04:34Sure thing.
04:36Thanks, man.
04:38New tenants.
04:39Yeah, this is...
04:42What's your startup called?
04:44Spec points.
04:45Spec points, that's right.
04:46And you are?
04:47Hugo.
04:48Liam.
04:49And that beast over there is Ryan.
04:52Well, welcome, boys.
04:53If there's anything you need, just let us know.
04:55Yes, anything you need, just let us know.
04:56And I'll ask Guy to hook you up with the Wi-Fi.
05:00Already in.
05:00Caliente.
05:09Do I need to change the Wi-Fi?
05:11Why?
05:11Because they hacked it.
05:12Weren't you going to give it to them anyway?
05:14Yes.
05:15I'm confused.
05:16Did they hack?
05:17Are they hackers?
05:18Well, what's with the frat boys?
05:20Oh, they're hot spacing.
05:21They're kind of cute.
05:22What we could do with some male energy around here.
05:24What?
05:25Oh, sorry, Paul.
05:26You know what I mean.
05:27No, I don't know what you mean.
05:28Yeah, they look handsy.
05:31Six hands all together.
05:33Do I need to read them the court of conduct?
05:35Definitely.
05:35The hunk is spanked me.
05:36They're joining the Wi-Fi, not the company.
05:38Just don't scare them off.
05:41You know, in some cultures, bicycles are actually seen as a sign of potency.
05:45Oh, shut up, Paul.
05:47Who-man's probably ten posts ahead of us by now.
05:50That man spanked my arse.
05:52Who got the beat this time?
05:58Who got the beat, beat Dan?
05:59Tell it, tell it.
06:00Who got the beat this time?
06:02Keep it hundred.
06:04What you gonna show me, fam?
06:05What you gonna show me, bro?
06:06That ain't me done.
06:07You want a word with me?
06:08You want to tell me some?
06:10And tell your bitch to get off my shit.
06:12Helen!
06:14A moment.
06:15Yes, Helen.
06:16I wanted to talk to you too.
06:18I hear things didn't go well with Margaret.
06:21No.
06:23She was very disagreeable.
06:26That's what I wanted to talk to you about.
06:29She's a no.
06:30Advertising revenue is down because of women.
06:33Traffic is up.
06:34And this is just a temporary shift that is gonna turn around.
06:40We're gonna bounce back.
06:41We are a long way from this month's revenue targets.
06:45To bounce back, you need to be very bouncy.
06:48I will be.
06:49And I've got a plan.
06:52Can we send Paul in?
06:55Yeah.
06:56Sure.
07:08Helen said you're pretending to have a plan.
07:11I need you to do a hard sell while I keep looking for a partner.
07:17Oh.
07:18What are you looking for in a partner?
07:21Broad shoulders, sense of humour, six foot?
07:23A business partner, bozo.
07:26Someone with deep pockets and no values.
07:29Finance person.
07:29I do have an Ask Adam post that I really want to...
07:32Maybe you should ask Adam if we can afford to keep that going.
07:36Yeah, I will.
07:39I know he'll say yes.
07:40I think it might have hanged you.
07:54I think it might have hanged you.
07:58Let it motivate you.
07:59Let it motivate you.
07:59Fuck.
08:00Any ideas?
08:01I'd love to...
08:02Has anyone seen the Who Man story on their reader profile?
08:06The woman woman?
08:07Yeah, that's the one.
08:08Like that's the modern woman.
08:09No one doesn't claim that.
08:10It's the woman woman.
08:11It's the woman woman.
08:12Kind of smart actually.
08:13It's very glam.
08:14I kind of dig it.
08:15How do they have a reader profile so quickly?
08:16It's like Kate with a C took months to perfect.
08:17It's just style over substance.
08:18I don't know.
08:19I don't know.
08:20I don't know.
08:21I don't know.
08:22I don't know.
08:23I don't know.
08:24It's the woman woman.
08:25It's the woman woman.
08:26It's the woman woman.
08:27Kind of smart actually.
08:29It's very glam.
08:30I kind of dig it.
08:31How do they have a reader profile so quickly?
08:34It's like Kate with a C took months to perfect.
08:37It's just style over substance.
08:39Soulless air.
08:40Penny, say something cutting and funny to make me feel better.
08:45They're a bit shit.
08:47Okay.
08:48It's true.
08:49I guess.
08:50What are we doing today?
08:52Plastic celebs.
08:54Bit mean.
08:55Punching up, not down.
08:57All our plastic celebs have been nominated for Oscars.
09:00What's that?
09:01Oh, there's a renewed push for GMO labelling.
09:03Got it.
09:04I mean, I just don't know what I've got to do to come up with an original idea.
09:08I've got to find it myself, I suppose.
09:10Do I?
09:11Is this, is this who we are?
09:13It's who we were yesterday.
09:15Pen, are you with us today?
09:19Yeah.
09:20No.
09:21Um.
09:22You don't seem like your usual droll, deeply sarcastic self.
09:27Are you alright?
09:29Yeah.
09:30I'm just distracted by all this marriage equality stuff in the US right now.
09:35I feel like I'm not being straight with my readers.
09:37Oh, you're not opposed to it, are you?
09:39No.
09:40No.
09:41Okay.
09:42I am being straight with them.
09:43Like, really straight with them.
09:46You've completely lost me.
09:48I want to come out to my readers.
09:50Oh, come out.
09:52Oh, I didn't know you were in.
09:56Surprise.
09:57But you write about Dear Husband.
10:00Yeah, it was a cover up.
10:01I don't know why.
10:02I just thought you wouldn't want to get a parenting editor.
10:06Oh.
10:07No.
10:08I don't mind.
10:09I love it.
10:13Well, I owe it to them.
10:16Nah.
10:17You don't owe them anything.
10:18I mean, if you want to do it, do it for yourself.
10:21Go.
10:22Thanks, Ev.
10:23Ev.
10:24I thought you'd want to know that the tech boys have eaten all the crunchy peanut butter.
10:38Did you know Penny was gay?
10:40Yes.
10:41Did you hear me?
10:42The entire jar.
10:43Are you feeling insecure, Paul?
10:46Well, what are you going to do?
10:47Are you going to reprimand them?
10:49Hey, it's just me.
10:51Can I get a package?
10:53What's going on?
10:55That is my cold-pressed juice delivery.
10:58What's all this?
10:59You don't have to get stabby.
11:01Happy to share my juice with you.
11:04Running cliche.
11:05Leave some space for me, please.
11:06For my wife.
11:09More.
11:13More.
11:19This is about Erica, isn't it?
11:21Look, I would have told you.
11:23Thing is, it's just, it's not that serious.
11:26We're not even divorced.
11:28That's because you haven't posted the papers.
11:30Yeah, well, why don't you post them?
11:34This is both our place.
11:36I know it is.
11:37Well, we need to set some boundaries.
11:39I'm appalled that you've brought a woman into our family home without me having met her first.
11:45Yeah, well, like you said, Ev, this is both our place, okay?
11:49Mine too.
11:50And I wasn't aware that I had to run everything by you.
11:53Besides, she's the school librarian, okay?
11:56She's like a notch below being a nun.
11:58Doesn't look like a nun.
12:00She hasn't even stayed the night.
12:03I mean, is it even allowed?
12:05At work, we have a code of conduct.
12:07Oh, come on.
12:08Paul was desperate to ask Opal out, and I said no.
12:11Can you please put the knife down?
12:15We have to find a way of making this work.
12:21How would you feel if I was seeing someone?
12:25Well, are you?
12:26No.
12:28I'd be happy for you.
12:29I think you should.
12:30Unlike you, I'm enjoying my own company.
12:33I think your company's just fine.
12:35I meant I'm okay with being alone.
12:37Right.
12:38Sorry.
12:40I even talk to myself sometimes, especially in the car.
12:43And honestly, I make some pretty solid points.
12:47Well, that's great, Ev.
12:49Maybe you should record that.
12:52A one-on-one with yourself.
13:00Maybe I will.
13:04I want everyone's full attention for this.
13:07Hi, Paul.
13:08Oh, sorry.
13:09This is content.
13:10Can I post it?
13:11Okay.
13:12Quickly.
13:13Looks like great content.
13:14It is.
13:15Thigh gaps.
13:16Thigh gaps?
13:17What, so everyone who's not a mermaid?
13:18How's Ask Adam?
13:19I'm glad you asked Adam.
13:20It's going really well.
13:21I got three new reader submissions today.
13:23Okay, guys.
13:24That's enough.
13:25So, this whole who-man-woman situation reminded me of something.
13:31Something that I may have lost focus of over the last few weeks.
13:35They may be able to outspend us, but what have we got that they haven't?
13:42Um, for our boys?
13:45No.
13:46Well, yes, but no.
13:48You.
13:49Well, yeah.
13:50We have me, but what else?
13:52Kate.
13:53No.
13:54You.
13:55Us.
13:56Our ideas.
13:57What they can't do is outthink us.
14:00Now, we have to do what we've always done.
14:03We have to pioneer a new territory.
14:05We've been talking about podcasting, and I think now is exactly the right time.
14:12Have our voices heard in a new way.
14:14Let's generate some show ideas.
14:16We could even have some fun puns.
14:18New hate puns.
14:19May have changed my puns-ish.
14:21Well, I like them if they're smart and they make sense.
14:26Opal minds.
14:28The best of what to watch, wear, read and eat.
14:31Beauty spots.
14:32Beauty trends and natural remedies.
14:35Love it.
14:36And pen?
14:37Hmm.
14:38I'm crap with it.
14:39How about penny for your thoughts?
14:40Yes.
14:41Where we can talk about parenting trends and identities.
14:44So, they don't all have to be puns, guys.
14:47Okay, what about socially unconscious?
14:49Or the digital feminist?
14:51Keeping feminism alive in the modern world.
14:54Really good.
14:55Hmm.
14:56Now let's think about setting up a little studio.
14:58Yeah.
14:59Should I get Helen in? Budget?
15:00No.
15:01Don't bother her.
15:02No.
15:03Where should we set it up?
15:04Somewhere quiet.
15:06Soundproofed.
15:11No.
15:12But you said that you love sitting at the communal table because you don't want to miss out on anything.
15:16No, I didn't.
15:17Come on, Paul.
15:18You're always going on about how soundproofed it is.
15:21Dude, I'm sick of you gloating about having your own office anyway.
15:24Thank you, Paul.
15:25It's wonderful.
15:26Good on you, Paul.
15:27Thank you, Paul.
15:28Thanks, Paul.
15:29Evelyn, can I have a chat to you?
15:30In my office?
15:31Literally just parking now.
15:33I'm sorry.
15:34I know.
15:35I know.
15:36You missed maths.
15:37Oh, wow.
15:38Same class I used to skip when I was in high school.
15:43I'll take French.
15:44I can get by, conversationally.
15:45You can order a kilo of pears.
15:46That doesn't count.
15:47Manger de la merde.
15:48Okay.
15:49I'm going to take science.
15:50I'll meet up later in PDH, alright?
15:51Okay.
15:52Hi, guys.
15:53Hi.
15:54This is like academic speed dating.
15:55Come over for a drink after.
15:56I'm parched already.
15:57Oh, yeah.
15:58Okay.
15:59I'll text you when we're done.
16:00Where's Daniel?
16:01Oh, he's bribing the science teacher with some legal skills.
16:04Oh, yeah.
16:05Oh, yeah.
16:06Okay.
16:07I'll text you when we're done.
16:09Where's Daniel?
16:10Oh, he's bribing the science teacher with some legal skills.
16:13Ophelia's failing already.
16:16I'm concerned about Addy.
16:21Is there anything going on at home that I should know about?
16:25No.
16:26Nothing at all.
16:27Well, we're getting a divorce.
16:29And the separation is still fresh.
16:31But you already knew that, didn't you, Cathy?
16:34Yeah.
16:35Annabelle told the whole faculty.
16:36Oh.
16:37She has a massive mouth.
16:39Well, everything we do is for the children.
16:42I mean, even separating.
16:45We weren't modelling a healthy relationship, Cathy.
16:49We were fighting a lot.
16:51Well, that's an interesting way to frame me being yelled at a lot.
16:55I wasn't fighting with myself.
16:57Anyway, we just woke up one day and we wanted different things.
17:01John was winding down.
17:03I was winding up.
17:04Well, you were definitely wound up.
17:06But seriously, I do think we're doing a better job at presenting as a functional partnership,
17:12but separated.
17:13Oh.
17:14Partners in divorce.
17:15Yeah.
17:16Can we get back to Addie?
17:18I'll have a chat to her about not challenging the teachers.
17:23In the meantime, can you please stop telling her to question authority all the time?
17:27I didn't mean literally.
17:29Do you think she's exploring her sexuality?
17:34I wonder whether that's why she's struggling with her friends.
17:37I'd hate to think she can't talk to us.
17:40Yeah, me too.
17:41I wish someone had warned us about how much parenting involves frantic speculation about your kids having sex.
17:47Enjoy your night off.
17:48See you Sunday.
17:49Mm-hmm.
17:50See you then.
17:51Hey.
17:52Hey.
17:57How are ya?
17:58Good.
17:59How are you?
18:00I wanna go for you.
18:03Is it serious?
18:16I don't know.
18:17She certainly is.
18:19Did you know about this?
18:21Well, you know men don't really gossip the same way that women do.
18:24You just deal with what's directly in front of us.
18:26Shut up.
18:27So I guess it's over?
18:28but he's literally having sex with someone else.
18:33Um, can I just remind you that you actually left him, remember, moving out?
18:37Thanks for the reminder, Dan.
18:40Anyway, on top of that, our kids don't even want to spend time with us anymore.
18:44Yours are older. It's normal, Ev.
18:46I hated my mother.
18:49Yeah, same.
18:50I don't know what it is. I just feel a bit wobbly.
18:53It doesn't matter. I'm just tired. I'm always tired.
18:56Let's change the subject.
18:58How's the hiatus going? Are you bored yet?
19:01No. I'm loving pottering around our lovely new home.
19:05Signed up for pole dancing.
19:07Have you?
19:08Mm.
19:09Mm. How?
19:10Stimulating.
19:12Hope you appreciate all of this.
19:14It doesn't help me. We don't have a pole in the bedroom.
19:17I've just spent so much time in my head.
19:19When you intellectualise everything, it's easy to become disconnected.
19:24You think sliding up and down a pole's going to fix that.
19:26I don't know. It makes me feel younger.
19:28You should come.
19:29I can't. My hips don't rotate the way a normal person's does.
19:33Haven't had sex for...
19:34Oh, okay. Thanks. That's enough.
19:37I, um, I better tell the kids that it's time for bed.
19:40Be back in a minute.
19:41Hey, um, I need your help.
19:50Do you remember the Tinder mishap?
19:53The one-off mishap?
19:55Well, it was more like a four-off, but anyway.
19:59Why am I not surprised?
20:01She's been harassing me, like, really badly, calling three, four times a day.
20:05She even sends nudes.
20:07Here, look, I'll show you.
20:08I don't want to see.
20:10Okay, show me.
20:13It's a still photo, but you really get a sense of movement.
20:19I need you to talk to a woman-to-woman, like, get her to back off.
20:23Why don't you get fucked?
20:25You may try in bed multiple times.
20:28You line it.
20:29This would destroy Lucy.
20:31Please, I'm going to text you my number, okay?
20:36Our kids are in our bed.
20:38You might want to sleep on the couch again tonight.
20:40Oh, great.
20:50Hello?
20:51I'm home.
21:01Oh, hi.
21:05Hi, Mum.
21:07Hi, darling.
21:08You want to watch something?
21:10Oh, um, I was just going to head to bed.
21:14Okay.
21:15Night.
21:17I love you.
21:26You should be you on the side.
21:29You should always be you.
21:31Because you're bloody brilliant.
21:34I think you should share your story.
21:37I'm just worried about the fallout, you know?
21:39It's pretty controversial.
21:40Some people aren't too keen on...
21:42Fuck them.
21:43Anyway, I think they're ready.
21:45And if they're not, we'll bring them along with us.
21:48I'd be honoured for it to be Eve's first podcast.
21:53Just make sure you enunciate.
21:55Okay.
21:56I'll get writing.
21:57Thanks, Ev.
21:58See you tomorrow.
21:59Bye, Pen.
22:01With a mic that plugs into the laptop and we've made a soundproof fort.
22:14Oh, wow.
22:19Oh, I love it.
22:21Wow, how exciting.
22:23Oh, a new frontier for Eve live.
22:26We can really connect with our audience.
22:28Mixing console.
22:30Those fancy little desk mics.
22:32Production values.
22:33That can all come later.
22:34That can all come later.
22:36Oh, my God.
22:38Okay.
22:40Cold there, Neil?
22:41Yeah.
22:42All right, that's for you.
22:44All right.
22:45Cool.
22:46Evelyn told me to remind you to...
22:48Enunciate.
22:49Oh, no.
22:49Okay.
22:50Hello, listeners.
22:54Welcome to Eve Life's very first podcast.
22:57I'm Jeet Achari.
22:58Thrilled to be here as your digital feminist.
23:01Thank you, Jeet.
23:02Shall we get on with it?
23:03Yeah.
23:03Yeah.
23:04Hello, world.
23:06Welcome to The Honest Mother, a place where you can have messy conversations about parenting.
23:11I'm Penny Wilson, your host.
23:13But before you get honest with me, I've got Jeet here who will help me get honest with you.
23:20Hi.
23:21So, Penny, we were talking the other day about how there's a part of yourself that you haven't
23:26shared with Eve Life's audience before.
23:28Yeah.
23:30Okay.
23:31Here goes.
23:33I'm a mum.
23:34I'm a writer.
23:36I'm allergic to mangoes.
23:38And I'm gay.
23:39For the past couple of years, I've been writing online, and I've always omitted that part
23:45of myself, my identity.
23:48Why do you think that is, Penn?
23:51I just got used to not expressing my sexuality.
23:55I was worried that people wouldn't value my voice in the same way that they would a straight
24:00writer.
24:01I still worry about that, actually.
24:03But I'm hoping that it's all worth it, because I don't want to hide anymore.
24:09Oh, we've run out of time.
24:12That was a lot to get off my chest.
24:13But thank you for listening, and I can't wait to share more with you.
24:17See you next week on The Honest Mother.
24:18It's so good.
24:22Penny.
24:22Really?
24:23Did you cry?
24:24Are you crying?
24:25No.
24:25Hang on.
24:26I may have a stinging sensation around the rims of my eyes.
24:30I only cry at videos of children hearing for the first time.
24:34Okay.
24:36You feeling good?
24:38Yeah.
24:38That's it.
24:51We have entered the world of podcasting.
24:53Yes!
24:54Good riddance, dear husband.
24:56You have died a brutal death.
24:59How did he die?
25:00Chort on a sausage.
25:01All right.
25:02Now we need to direct our readers to listen.
25:05Go and write some stories.
25:06In the silence I hear you're feeling cold
25:14In your eyes I see, feel it all
25:22Have you seen the comments on Penny's podcast?
25:41Oh, don't tell me.
25:42People don't want parenting advice from a lesbian.
25:45I know, the world's still fundamentally homophobic.
25:47You know that.
25:48I know that.
25:49I mean, I just would none the wiser.
25:50Penny!
25:51Oh, poor thing.
25:53I'll tell Guy to take it down.
25:54I've probably pushed the podcast a bit much.
25:56No.
25:57They're positive.
25:58Everyone's loving it.
25:59Are they?
26:00Fantastic.
26:01Well, that's fantastic.
26:03That's very gay.
26:04You cold?
26:06Yeah.
26:07You look great.
26:08I've had a slew of hot date offers.
26:11I've got a babysitter, a new lipstick, and a late start tomorrow.
26:17You should be careful going on dates with strangers.
26:19Oh, duty.
26:20Women tend to look out for each other.
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