Narrow Escapes Season 1 Episode 6
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00:00The Great British Canal Network.
00:04Lovely, isn't it? Beautiful day for it.
00:06A picturesque escape for those who've swapped bricks and mortar...
00:10I can't believe she's asked.
00:11...for a new life on the water.
00:13But is it always smooth sailing?
00:16You're in the train.
00:17Sorry.
00:18Whether they're taking on new business ventures...
00:20It's father and son. It's never calm.
00:23...or embarking on epic adventures...
00:25Look at the view.
00:27...they keep their heads above water.
00:31Or will it be a washout?
00:33This is real boating.
00:34From dreams fulfilled...
00:35We can do everything. We just do it really slowly.
00:38...to moments chilled...
00:40I'm very lucky.
00:41...do they have what it takes to live out their dreams...
00:44This is just delightful.
00:46...and find their narrow escape.
00:49Coming up, we're on board Holly the cafe boat
00:52to find out if this family of three
00:54have found the perfect recipe for life on the canal.
00:57Wow!
00:58That's a good one, wasn't it?
00:59We meet May, who's balancing her yoga career
01:02alongside a minimalist lifestyle...
01:04I like how every time I have breakfast,
01:06it's always a little bit different.
01:07...and stand-up comedian Joe,
01:09as he takes his comedy show on tour.
01:12You haven't seen this before, have you?
01:13No.
01:14Oh, you're in for a treat.
01:19In Marple, on the Peak Forest Canal,
01:21it's time for Vic and Joe Gould and son William
01:24to take their two narrowboats and canoe out for a cruise.
01:28Now I've just got to move the canoe back,
01:31back to the back of the other boat.
01:34For the first time ever,
01:36Vic is going to try and move them all as one.
01:39Three boats in tow.
01:40Yeah.
01:42It's never been a good idea before,
01:44but I think why not try it now while there's cameras?
01:49The married couple Vic and Joe Gould are continuous cruisers
01:53who pull Holly the cafe boat and their canoe
01:56behind their floating home, the narrowboat Zero.
01:59We met at work and Vic already had a boat,
02:02he was living on a boat,
02:03and he was having the one that we live on now, Zero, built,
02:05and I guess I found that pretty intriguing.
02:07And then when that boat was ready, we both moved on it together
02:10and we've been on boats ever since.
02:12And while Vic and Joe move around,
02:14they also upload to an online video blog
02:17where customers and fans can keep up to date with their travels.
02:21We started doing this vlog on YouTube.
02:23We feel like we've got regulars, cos we do,
02:25like there's some people that we know
02:27just from them coming down to the cafe boat.
02:29Yeah, and they follow us wherever we go.
02:31Yeah, wherever we are, it's great.
02:33All of our time is filled with vlogging and baking for the cafe.
02:38And if it isn't enough to look after two narrowboats and a canoe,
02:42they also have their 18-month-old son, William.
02:46Wow! Wow!
02:48That's a good one, wasn't it?
02:50We'd lived on a boat probably for about seven years
02:52before we had William.
02:54So we were like, we knew boat life
02:56and how difficult that can be sometimes.
03:00So then we were just adding something else to the mix.
03:02I think if I'd have moved on a boat and had William straight away,
03:06we'd have moved straight off the boats.
03:08It was only cos we were used to the boats
03:10that I think we could, we were all right.
03:13As continuous cruisers,
03:15they've stayed as long as they're permitted to in their current spot
03:19and now need to move on.
03:21We've got what's called a continuous cruiser's licence.
03:25It's all written in sort of really old, ancient law.
03:29So you're supposed to move on to the next parish every 14 days.
03:34So that's kind of open to interpretation a little bit,
03:37these days, obviously.
03:40But we do move on to the next parish.
03:44And it's time to put Vic's connected boat theory to the test.
03:48Quick job is the best job, I thought.
03:50Come on, then.
03:52We're going.
03:53Oh, nice!
03:55And now's the perfect opportunity
03:57for William to do a spot of birdwatching.
04:00Although Vic and Jo do have to move every couple of weeks,
04:03they cruise mostly around the Peak Forest and Macclesfield canals
04:07and are off to set up shop for the first time this season.
04:16But birdwatching is tiring work and William is in need of a break.
04:21I'm just going to set up the baby monitor
04:24so that, because William's asleep right in the front of the boat,
04:27so if we're going along, I plug this in
04:31and then we can hear him if he starts crying.
04:34It's pretty hard to hear over the engine,
04:36so I have this with me outside and then I know if he's woken up.
04:39He just sleeps for ages whenever the engine's going.
04:42I think it must be, like, soothing him to sleep.
04:45With William asleep, Vic is keeping an eye out
04:48for the perfect spot to moor up.
04:50I feel like we've got the best of both worlds, really,
04:53because we live in this place where we're kind of surrounded by geese.
04:56Sometimes they're quite noisy, but they're always nice.
04:59And, you know, we've just seen ducklings this morning and stuff like that.
05:03It's quite idyllic, but then again,
05:05we can choose to be near towns for a little bit of convenience
05:08and to sort of run the cafe a bit easier and stuff like that,
05:11so I feel a bit lucky, to be honest.
05:15A big part of Jo's day is dedicated to her vlogs,
05:19advertising her brilliant baking.
05:21Yeah, we'd bake things and show them on the vlogs
05:23and serve them at the cafe,
05:25and people would be asking me about the recipes.
05:27Anyone who watches the vlogs, they can order it
05:30and kind of make the cakes that we make on the cafe boat.
05:33But the cafe boat recipes have proved so popular
05:36that Jo is expanding their reach.
05:39I'm doing a little bit of work on the cookbook that I'm putting together.
05:42My friend Rebecca, she's been designing the cover for it
05:45and she's just sent me the sort of final version.
05:48It started out because when I had William,
05:51I had a lot of time sort of in the house with him
05:54and I used that time to get all of it written.
05:57And it looks like somebody has heard their name mentioned.
06:02Geese. Well, I don't know if I'm saying it right now.
06:05With William awake from his nap, it's back to nature watching
06:09as Vic keeps a keen eye out for the perfect spot.
06:16In London, at a comedy club in Shoreditch,
06:19comedian and narrowboater Joel Sanders
06:21is making the final preparations for tonight's gig.
06:24It's not quite level, is it?
06:26It's not quite central.
06:28It's the building that's wonky, it's not the...
06:30It doesn't matter. This is final.
06:32Looking forward to it. Would you like a drink?
06:34You know, if I do, I'm going to fall over,
06:36so no, I'm just going to sit with the waters for now.
06:38But thank you, Tim. All right. Thank you very much.
06:41When Joel is not making people laugh on land,
06:44he's living life on the water.
06:46It's a really nice way to live.
06:48Er, for me.
06:50But it's not for everybody.
06:52Gee! This one's scaring me.
06:54Do you see the way he snaps that?
06:56And with the freedom of boat life,
06:58it must mean Joel gets to perform all over the country.
07:01I've never done a show north of Milton Keynes, I don't think.
07:04I've always done it around where I happen to be on the boat,
07:07which is typically within 30 miles of London.
07:10Well, tonight he's performing his show, The Angry Boater.
07:14I've been doing it for eight years and I call it that because,
07:18well, there's this myth that boating is all about serenity
07:22and joy and peace and harmony.
07:25And it is sometimes, but if anyone's lived on a boat
07:28for any period of time, and I've lived on mine for 13 years,
07:31you know, there's a lot of problems that come with it.
07:34I'm on stage in 45 minutes.
07:37Am I nervous?
07:39Um...
07:40After eight years of performing, surely not.
07:43I am nervous tonight, yes.
07:45Tonight I'm more nervous than I normally am.
07:47And I don't like it.
07:49I don't always get nervous these days.
07:51I used to when I was younger.
07:53It's rarer these days that I get nervous.
07:56I do not have a pre-gig ritual other than to get there on time
08:01and to test the microphone.
08:03You don't have a microphone?
08:05Tim was meant to bring one.
08:07Ah, I've got mine, don't worry.
08:09I just hope it will fit into your system.
08:11Yeah, showing up on time, doing a sound check.
08:14And, yeah, trying to centre myself.
08:18Many years ago, I used to work in the States.
08:21I did a week in Vegas back in 2000.
08:23A week in Vegas.
08:24And now, and, you know, it was a beautiful green room there.
08:27I remember there was a leather settee there.
08:29It was lovely. They keep bringing you champagne.
08:31I've been very well looked after.
08:33Is it glamorous? There's a freezer.
08:35There's a bag of onions.
08:37When he's not hanging out in the glamour of the green room,
08:40Joel likes to schmooze some of his fellow boaters.
08:43You haven't seen this before, have you?
08:46Where are you at the moment?
08:49Ah, lovely. I was there a few weeks ago.
08:51I was on a bend there once and a deer fell in.
08:53It was at three in the morning.
08:55So my boat was rocking around like mental.
08:57I thought I had an intruder and it was a little deer.
09:00So I managed to untie the front and it swam off.
09:03Amazing swimmers.
09:04So these are my people, my tribe.
09:06If I have a tribe, I don't think I have a tribe, actually.
09:09I'm going to talk about that tonight in the show.
09:11I've never known who my tribe is.
09:13Sometimes I think it's boaters.
09:15OK, showtime.
09:18Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the show.
09:21Please put your hands together and do some clapping for Mr Angry Boater.
09:25Thank you very much. Yes.
09:28So, this is about anger and it's about boats.
09:31And it's true, if you live on a boat and someone buys you a gift,
09:34you've got to throw something out, haven't you?
09:36You've got to throw something else out.
09:38Now, I love my new coffee maker.
09:40I miss the twins.
09:44And the show gets under way.
09:51But Joel is not afraid to handle the big issues.
09:54I call it having boatential.
09:56Do you have boatential?
09:58If you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public cubicle.
10:04You have boatential.
10:06If the address registered with your GP is also an Amazon pickup point.
10:11Boatential.
10:13Thank you very much.
10:16Well, that's another gig done. I'm looking forward to going back to my boat.
10:19The fire will have gone off. I'm going to have to light that.
10:21I'll probably only be back to one in the morning.
10:23And Joel is aspiring to expand his horizons
10:26and follow in the footsteps of one of his great heroes.
10:30I was very inspired by Phil Collins on Live Aid,
10:33who in the same day managed to do two gigs 6,000 miles apart in London and America.
10:39What I want to see is if I, in a month,
10:42can manage two gigs 60 miles apart on a narrow boat.
10:46So tomorrow I'm going to start heading off to the Midlands.
10:49I don't even know where that second gig is going to be.
10:51I'm going to try and find a venue, promote it, sell tickets,
10:54get an audience and do the show, and do all that within 14 days
10:57before I am legally obliged to move on to the next place.
11:01And at a speed of four miles an hour and with tens of locks ahead,
11:05he's going to need those 30 days to achieve his goal.
11:08Coming up...
11:10Joel walks us through the realities of life on a boat.
11:13It's not sexy.
11:14Your toilet tank is empty. That is a feeling of euphoria.
11:17And we meet May, yogi extraordinaire.
11:20I have to get quite creative with how I do things.
11:29On the Oxford Canal near Cropperody in Oxfordshire
11:32is nature-loving May Mansfield,
11:34a yoga teacher who leads a sustainable lifestyle
11:37aboard her 62-foot narrowboat, Dwarf.
11:40He doesn't usually get it all to himself, but it's his lucky day.
11:43Where's Mummy?
11:45She's busy over there with the algae.
11:49May is a solo continuous cruiser
11:52and has been on board for over two and a half years.
11:55The best part of this lifestyle is being so connected to nature.
11:59I wake up in the morning and I can hear the swans and the ducks
12:02knocking at my hull, eating breakfast.
12:04It feels really peaceful.
12:06This boat is like my baby.
12:09I've completely moulded my entire career, everything around her.
12:14She's an online yoga instructor
12:16and streams classes directly from the boat.
12:18So I turn to yoga more as a way to get fit.
12:22And it's so powerful for your mental health.
12:25And I feel confident, empowered,
12:29and even when I don't, I know that I'll be OK.
12:32And that self-belief is invaluable,
12:35and that is because of yoga for me.
12:38And that's why I want to share.
12:45Oh, my gosh, so little left.
12:47Ever the health-conscious yogi,
12:49her day begins with a nourishing and wholesome breakfast.
12:53So I've got me oat milk.
12:55Goji berries.
12:57I like how every time I have breakfast,
12:59it's always a little bit different.
13:01Cooking for me is quite a creative process.
13:04I think the lifestyle can definitely help you think more
13:08about the way in which you want to live
13:11and how you want to have an impact.
13:13My diet very much comes down to the fact
13:15that I want to treat myself well
13:17so I can treat the world and the environment well.
13:21While her journey along the Oxford Canal
13:23is filled with the splendour of nature,
13:25her yoga keeps her focused and positive through the tough days.
13:29It is dark, it's rainy, it's muddy, it's cold,
13:32but I think it's about just cracking on with it.
13:35And May is not the only one who likes to start their day
13:38with a nourishing breakfast.
13:40You know how to make a girl feel guilty, don't you?
13:43Her strong connection to nature and positive outlook
13:46helps her deal with the challenges of a life constantly on the move.
13:51I definitely get attached to where I am.
13:55I get used to that feeling of having to just let it go.
13:58This lifestyle is a lot about accepting things when they prop up
14:02and you're not expecting them to.
14:04For example, sometimes I'm expecting to move on,
14:08turn my engine over, it doesn't turn on.
14:10And you're like, OK, well, today is an engine day.
14:13May's boat serves as more than just a home,
14:16it's also the studio for her yoga business.
14:19Working in a small space, you always have to get creative.
14:28I'm going to start piling stuff everywhere.
14:34Studio light.
14:36Tiny Home Yoga is pretty unique.
14:38There aren't many people doing yoga like I am in this way,
14:41teaching it online from the boat itself.
14:43It really gives you an insight into boat life.
14:46I have to get quite creative with how I do things.
14:48You know, I can't stretch my hands up, so I use my elbows.
14:51Exhale, hands come out to the sides, leaning with the wrists.
14:55All right, so I'm going to mute you all now.
14:58If you're in a small space like me, then keep your knees bent,
15:02feet flat on the floor, hands on your body.
15:05And as you inhale, lengthening up through the crown,
15:08just visualising and seeing how that extends up
15:11as your shoulders drop away.
15:13In order to extend beyond the physical confines
15:16of the narrowboat interior,
15:18May wants to build a wooden deck on her roof
15:21to provide her with an alternative space to practise her yoga.
15:25And today, she's off to collect some wooden pallets
15:28in order to start this new DIY project.
15:31The pallets were found, actually,
15:33I just came across them in this construction site,
15:37knocked on the door,
15:38hey, can I have some of those?
15:40And shoved them in the back of my car.
15:42I had the thought of buying all the wood
15:44and I started to get worried about how much that would start costing me,
15:47so pallets is the way, like, it's great to upcycle stuff.
15:50And with absolutely no carpentry experience,
15:53will this ambitious DIY project prove to be a stretch too far?
16:01Back on his boat on the Grand Union Canal
16:03in Apsley near Hemel Hempstead,
16:05Joel is excited about the journey ahead.
16:09I'm planning to get to the Midlands within 60 days
16:13and doing a show there, but anything could happen.
16:16I've got 70 locks to go through, at least.
16:19And you've no idea what could go wrong.
16:21I'm about to hit something, hang on.
16:23Luckily, a false alarm that time.
16:25But Joel is about to encounter the first of more than 70 locks
16:29as he begins his adventure beyond the outskirts of London
16:32for the very first time.
16:34It's the biggest fear often when you first get a boat,
16:36it's doing the locks, doing them on your own.
16:39It's like anything, you develop your techniques
16:42and you get used to it.
16:45Despite being a strenuous activity,
16:47it's a reality of canal life that Joel has perfected
16:51over his 13 years of cruising around Greater London.
16:55And this particular canal is the Grand Union,
16:58the longest in the UK,
17:00running from the Thames in London to Daventry in the Midlands,
17:04where it splits with one branch heading towards Birmingham
17:07and the other to Leicester.
17:09And it's to Daventry Joel is initially headed.
17:11But first, he needs to top up the essentials.
17:16This is the hydration point.
17:20I need to fill up with water.
17:23What you don't realise
17:25is when you have to make an effort to get your water
17:28and you have to manage your electricity and your gas
17:31and your energy and your toilet,
17:33you appreciate them a lot more.
17:35Because the greatest feeling in the world
17:37is when you've filled up your water tank
17:39and your toilet tank is empty.
17:41That is a feeling of euphoria. No feeling like it.
17:44It's not sexy.
17:46And it's even less sexy when you find out
17:48that in the cases of most boats,
17:50the toilet tank is located under the bed.
17:53There are various options
17:55when it comes to using the loo on a narrowboat.
17:57Compost toilets don't need water.
17:59Instead, the user sprinkles sawdust on the waste, dehydrating it.
18:03Eventually, this waste becomes fertiliser
18:06that can be reused sustainably.
18:08Compost toilets, on the other hand,
18:10simply hold everything in a box,
18:12which must be emptied and washed at an Elson disposal point.
18:16Whereas Joel has a pump-out toilet.
18:18They're popular for their ease of use.
18:20However, boaters must sleep with the waste tank under their bed.
18:24And back on his boat, it looks like the levels are rising.
18:27But Joel is focused on his mission.
18:30I used to do this a lot more up in a town
18:33and I'd just find a suitable venue
18:35and I'd get posts and flyers in as many shops as I can.
18:37I fly people in the street.
18:39If I can get any local media, local radio to promote it, I do.
18:42And then we do the show, just like that, organically.
18:44Like the old days, like the circus, P.T. Barnum.
18:46And, you know, when it works, it's great.
18:49Certain towns have done it and it's sold out.
18:51Sometimes, Windsor. Windsor was a typical one.
18:54I couldn't believe it. I thought Windsor would be really popular,
18:56a boating town.
18:57Seven tickets.
18:58Actually, seven people didn't come.
19:00Seven people bought tickets.
19:02Two of them didn't show up. Five people came.
19:04I still did the show.
19:05So there you go. That's the plan.
19:07Get there, find a venue, promote the show, sell the tickets,
19:11do the show, job done.
19:13Phil Collins.
19:15Rock and roll. What could possibly go wrong?
19:18With the jubilant feeling a full water tank brings,
19:22Joel departs onwards.
19:32How you doing?
19:33Blimey, what are you making?
19:37That is a big day. Your neighbours are going to love you.
19:41Some wonderful stretches.
19:43Look at that monkey there.
19:45It is Hemel Hempstead. It is Hemel Hempstead.
19:48Hey, how are you?
19:50Good, good, good?
19:51I'm going to places that I haven't been before.
19:53I'm going to hope to meet nice people.
19:55You just never know.
19:56Once you get loose and you start going to new territories,
19:59you kind of open up yourself.
20:00My spirit of adventure is going to be triggered.
20:02With this thirst for adventure ignited,
20:04Joel continues his epic quest, ready for anything that comes his way.
20:13Houston, we have a problem.
20:15It's full.
20:17I'm going to need to get it emptied
20:19before I embark on this particular voyage.
20:21I have a friend whose name is Warren.
20:24He has a pump-out boat,
20:26so I'm going to get Warren to come and do a pump-out for me.
20:29So is Warren your sort of go-to poo guy?
20:33I don't think he'd like it if I referred to him that way.
20:36But, yes, yes, he is.
20:39And without a functioning toilet,
20:41there's nothing left to do but settle in for the night
20:44and await help from his poo guy, Warren.
20:59Coming up...
21:00Some of William's favourite toys go for a swim.
21:03We've lost many a toy to the canal.
21:06And May takes on some wooden pallets.
21:09Nice big crack here.
21:11Who needs a gym membership when you live on a boat?
21:21Since 2012, the Canal and River Trust
21:24has helped to maintain our inland waterways
21:27as a modern community where people live, work and relax.
21:31But it wasn't always like this.
21:34From the 1700s onwards,
21:36when our 2,000-mile network was cut into the land,
21:39it was a series of vital industrial arteries
21:42transporting goods and busy people around a booming Britain.
21:48Here in Birmingham, a central hub of the Industrial Revolution,
21:52volunteer leader Shashi is taking out the Birmingham litter boat
21:56to clean up the canal.
21:58I'm a volunteer leader with the Canal and River Trust
22:01and I've been in this role for just over a year now.
22:04We have a crew that is completely led by volunteers
22:07and it's something, again, for them to get out and enjoy being on the water,
22:11making life better by water.
22:13For this morning's litter cruise, Shashi is met by Taz,
22:17the CRT's urban engagement manager.
22:20Morning, Taz. Hi, Shashi. How are you doing? You OK?
22:23Are you ready? Yes, I'm good, thank you very much.
22:25He wants a taste of a volunteer's life on the waterways.
22:29He works with local community teams
22:31and has done a lot in terms of cleaning up the canals
22:34and making sure that there's well-being activities
22:37for everyone to join in on.
22:39This is great because I'm trying to encourage volunteers
22:42to come and join us to do these activities,
22:44so to have an opportunity to try it myself, I can sell it much better.
22:49As they head towards the city, Shashi shows Taz the ropes.
22:56Oh, there's one that got away.
22:58See, I'm not very good at this. I do need a bit more practice.
23:01It's quite difficult.
23:06Back in Oxfordshire, on the Oxford Canal,
23:08and energised from her breakfast and morning yoga session,
23:11May is setting off to collect the first wooden pallet
23:14she wants to upcycle for her new decking.
23:17It's a bit on the dusty side.
23:20She plans to use the platform
23:22as an alternative yoga space on the roof of her boat.
23:27All right, let's do this.
23:29Free from the limitations of her interior space.
23:32I want to make a total of seven tiles to go on the roof.
23:37This should make about two tiles.
23:39The first stage, I have to break it all up,
23:41have to get all the nails out
23:43and then fill the nail holes with wood filler.
23:49And to meet her own target of two tiles per pallet,
23:52she'll have to salvage every bit of available wood.
23:56I'm going to hit the boat then. Add it to the list.
24:00I was not a DIY enthusiast before I moved onto a boat.
24:04I like to reuse and recycle materials
24:07that have been used for other things
24:09because it's part of the sustainable lifestyle
24:12that I'm going for, living on a boat.
24:14The environment is really important to me.
24:16It's one of the reasons why I'm here today in the environment,
24:19working alongside it.
24:21I think there's more rewards living a hardier life
24:25than living a comfortable one.
24:34A lot of work goes into this.
24:36Come on, baby!
24:43OK, maybe this isn't the technique.
24:45Who needs a gym membership when you live on a boat?
24:48But it isn't easy.
24:52Crack.
24:54Nice big crack here.
24:56Can't salvage all of them.
24:58It's part of the process. Things go wrong all the time.
25:01I hoped that this would create two tiles,
25:04but now I think it might only just create one.
25:08Oh, you know.
25:10No way. I can still do it.
25:12I need two more. Three more.
25:14How many more? Three more.
25:18So brittle.
25:25Oh, my God!
25:27Whether it's sheer brute force or bad luck,
25:30a lot of the wood is split
25:32and, unfortunately, she only has enough for one tile.
25:35I'm taking all the nails out so that I can fill the holes.
25:39To be honest, I think most of the nails are actually in the pallet still
25:43because of the brittleness of it.
25:45I am currently filling the nail holes with wood filler
25:51and this will just protect the decking from disintegrating, I guess,
25:56quickly because of the weather.
25:58It's going to be quite challenging for it, really,
26:01living on top of the boat.
26:03Once the filler has dried overnight,
26:06I will be sanding it down and then I will be varnishing it.
26:11I'm going to... Actually, I'm going to be oiling it.
26:15Then the next step after that will be to assemble, put them together.
26:21Whilst waiting for the filler to dry,
26:23May takes the opportunity to have a spot of lunch with Mum, Claire.
26:27Hi, Mum. Yeah.
26:30I'm really sore.
26:32Oh, my God.
26:36Yeah. Can I have a cup of tea? Yeah.
26:39I bought my own tea bag and my own cow's milk.
26:44It was really difficult. We had a pallet.
26:47It was so brittle and dry.
26:48It took me about two hours to get it apart
26:50and every single one snapped apart from those two that are up against the tree now.
26:54But despite the creaky start,
26:56May hopes to crack on with her ambitious DIY project
27:00after a cup of tea with Mum.
27:05On the Macclesfield Canal in High Lane,
27:08Vic and Jo have moored up in order to prepare Holly, their cafe boat,
27:13for business tomorrow.
27:15But first, their entertaining 18-month-old son, William.
27:19Hi.
27:22Spent quite a lot of time hanging out this window
27:25and waiting for ducks and geese to pass by.
27:29If we look here, a few boats.
27:31But this is like his TV. We don't have a TV, so...
27:35This is as entertaining as it gets on here.
27:38But it looks like William has his own ideas when it comes to entertainment.
27:47Oh, my goodness.
27:52No, we've lost many a toy to the canal.
27:56Go and wash that.
27:57Thankfully, nothing valuable has been chucked out yet,
28:01just his toys, and it's always his favourite ones.
28:04He just wants to love them.
28:05I think he knows what the water is,
28:07but he doesn't understand yet that it's dangerous
28:11or that he shouldn't go near it.
28:12And maintaining a regular routine of stimulating activities
28:16is a challenge in itself.
28:18It's quite hard to keep to a routine cos we move around all the time.
28:22I do a lot of Googling on my phone,
28:24where's the nearest library, where's the nearest park?
28:27I think he likes socialising, but we move it around all the time,
28:30so it's a different library group every time.
28:33I don't think he really minds,
28:34but it's just an extra thing to think about all the time, wherever we are.
28:38It helps us, like, integrate with the places that we're in.
28:42Cos I think before you could just drift through,
28:45but it's quite good now because in most places
28:48we've been to the library, met a couple of people,
28:51William's gotten something, some illness from one of the other kids,
28:56and then we move on.
28:57Shall we go to the park before he goes to sleep?
28:59Yeah, we could do.
29:00There you go.
29:02No.
29:03No.
29:04Come on, then.
29:05Oi!
29:06No!
29:09With William clearly bustling with extra energy,
29:12it's time for an excursion to the local park
29:14before finishing up preparations for the day.
29:17We're really thankful for these kind of spaces, really,
29:21because you find you've got to get off the boat.
29:23Actually, William's really good at getting us off the boat as well.
29:26I think probably before we would have always been outside
29:29most of the day anyway.
29:30Yeah, but it's hard to spend a big chunk of time in the boat,
29:33especially, like, that's why winter is the hardest,
29:36just because you're, like, if it's raining outside or really cold,
29:40it's, like, less appealing to get outside
29:43and it's just a bit harder with William.
29:49Let's give it a go.
29:51Variety's the spice of life,
29:53so Vic and Jo try to get William to experience
29:57different parts of the playground.
29:59But he's having none of it.
30:01Do you want to go up here?
30:03What, to the swing?
30:05To this one.
30:08What's this?
30:10No.
30:11Back to the swings.
30:13Wherever we go, we just tend to live on our doorstep.
30:16But that's so handy. I actually love...
30:18We've got a bike seat for him now, so we can take him on bike rides
30:23and he really enjoys it, which I'm so happy about,
30:26because it just means that we can pass her about a lot more.
30:33Come on, he's developed a swing addict.
30:36Yeah, maybe let's take him for a nap.
30:38Yeah. Time for a nap.
30:41Coming up, May faces her fears.
30:46It's the way they move!
30:48It's Warren to the rescue for Joel and his toilet tank.
30:51Here he is, the Father Christmas of the canals.
30:54And here we go, pay a visit to the waltzing Matilda.
30:57I bet you want to cry when the last piece of door goes out
30:59and there's none left for you.
31:06There's an old boating adage that says
31:08when the boats are rocking, don't come a-knocking.
31:11But in this case, in Berkhamstead on the Grand Union Canal,
31:15it's because Joel is in the middle of one of his VR workouts.
31:19Stand up.
31:21Up a cunt a bit.
31:23Mate, stand up.
31:27Downstairs. Upstairs.
31:30Stand up.
31:34The inconvenience of Joel's full toilet tank
31:37means he's been delayed on his journey north,
31:40and he's waiting for the arrival of his friend Warren and the pump-out boat.
31:44You try to put as little into your toilet as you possibly can.
31:48When I have friends come to visit,
31:50I try and encourage them to use a toilet in a pub first,
31:53because, unlike them, I don't have the privilege
31:56of eternal flushes on my toilet.
31:58The more people that use my toilet, the more often I've got to wait
32:01around for somebody like Warren to come and empty it for me.
32:04So let's put it this way.
32:06If you get invited to a party by somebody who lives on a boat
32:10and the invitation says, bring your own bottle,
32:13it does mean an empty one.
32:16And while waiting for his toilet to be pumped out,
32:19there are advantages to some other maintenance.
32:22There is a trade-off with living on a boat.
32:24On the one hand, I have to do stuff like this and change my gas bottle
32:29and learn all kinds of physical skills that I was never raised with.
32:34On the plus side, if you don't like your neighbours,
32:38you can untie your ropes, drift away, new neighbours.
32:43So there you go, gas bottle changed, but now we've got to wait for Warren.
32:48Captain Shytanic is on the way.
32:55How's it going?
32:57Hey.
32:59Are you on holiday or are you...?
33:01Well, we've got the rest of the family on a hire boat.
33:04Oh, nice. Good luck.
33:06Cheers.
33:08Eventually, Joel's patience pays off
33:10as he hears the distinctive tone of the pump boat on the horizon.
33:19Here he is, the Father Christmas of the canals.
33:22This is what kids feel like at Christmas
33:25when they're waiting for Santa to arrive, the euphoria.
33:28You've no idea.
33:32We are not worthy.
33:34I hope you can hear me over the sound of his engine.
33:36That engine is so distinctive,
33:38he can't pass me without me knowing it's him.
33:41I know when it's coming from a mile off.
33:43It's like the equivalent of the ice-cream man.
33:45I am relieved to see Warren.
33:48And I'll be even more relieved
33:50when Warren has done the job that he's here to do.
33:55Ever the professional, Warren wastes no time in starting a pump out.
34:08As you know, Warren, I like to refer to your boat as the Shytanic.
34:12You do? And you and various other people now, thanks to your show.
34:17Have I started a trend? You have.
34:19Warren, what I don't understand about you is, you know,
34:21you used to be my neighbour in Apsley, in the marina. I did.
34:24Long before you were doing this.
34:26And back then, you were a sound engineer, you were working,
34:29you were setting up the sound for a lot of major bands,
34:31you were touring the country.
34:32Was that not glamorous enough for you?
34:34There's nowhere near as glamorous as this.
34:36It's beautiful, isn't it? Yeah, it's wonderful.
34:38And in the time it takes Joel and Warren to have a cup of tea
34:41and catch up on old times, the toilet tank is empty.
34:45Now, I'm good for another three or four weeks.
34:47That's good. Thanks to you, Warren.
34:49And I'll see you next time. Safe travels.
34:51I'll see you when you get back.
34:53It's just another relief,
34:54it's one of the things you have to manage when you're on a boat.
34:57Right now, I've got a pretty full water tank,
34:59I've got an empty toilet tank.
35:01I'm a pretty happy guy. I'm in a good place.
35:04And with the liberation that a full water tank
35:07and an empty toilet tank bring,
35:09Joel is free to get back on track with his adventure.
35:16BIRDS CHIRP
35:18Back on the Oxford Canal in Oxfordshire,
35:21May is taking a break from her DIY project
35:24and having lunch with mum, Claire.
35:27You hate spiders. I do.
35:29Can you remove him?
35:31I don't think I want to. He's happy there.
35:33Why would I want to remove him?
35:35He was making his web and he was going back and forth
35:37and I was going to sleep, I was reading my book,
35:39and the thought went through my head, shall I go get the hoover?
35:42But then I thought, no, it's fine.
35:44I carried on reading my book, I looked back, he wasn't there,
35:47and old May would have wanted to not sleep,
35:51but I slept.
35:53And I was thinking, you know, he's all right,
35:55he's probably just behind the curtain.
35:57Definitely better at coexisting with them now.
36:00But, yes, still not a massive fan.
36:02OK, he's quite cute.
36:04THEY LAUGH
36:07It's the way they move!
36:09Oh, I'm sorry, May, I really just ruined your day.
36:13You're still scared of them.
36:15Arachnophobia conquered, it's time to get down to some chores.
36:19Shall we take our tea to the engine room?
36:21Yeah, let's do that.
36:22And today May needs to recharge and top up her batteries, literally.
36:29Most narrowboats have two battery banks,
36:31one to power the engine and one known as a leisure battery
36:35to run domestic appliances, and they need constant maintenance.
36:39I think if you buy a boat that's got character, that's older,
36:42you are going to continuously have projects and work that needs doing.
36:45And there's that attitude in this community
36:49where you just get on with it, you fix it,
36:51you learn how to do it yourself.
36:53The lifestyle evokes that sense of independence.
36:57It's time for Claire to head back home,
37:00while May returns to the pallet
37:02for the next stage of constructing her yoga platform.
37:06The job for today is we're going to sand down these blanks,
37:10we're going to make them look pretty,
37:11we're going to do some oiling to protect them from the weather.
37:14Got a claw hand from the crowbar.
37:17I can really feel it today.
37:26Sanding complete, May moves on to oiling the wood.
37:30A lot of this lifestyle is about trying things
37:33and making lots of mistakes
37:35and then doing it differently the following year.
37:37The reason I'm doing tiles is because I want to be able to move it
37:40and take it off and put it back on quite easily.
37:43Then there's the issue of storing,
37:45which is interesting on a narrow boat, storage is always a problem.
37:48I have a rule with my storage system, one in, one out.
37:52So if I want some new pillows or some new rugs or something like that,
37:56then I will have to get rid of the ones that I've currently got.
37:58And I always give to charity or upcycle so it's not wasted.
38:02I like the imperfections.
38:04I like that you can kind of see the repairs.
38:07Gives it character.
38:10Right, these are finished now.
38:13You can see the different colours and stuff, I quite like it.
38:18Picasso is happy.
38:20With the wood fully prepped,
38:22May can finally create a template for her portable platform.
38:26This is just to get an idea of how this first tile is going to be.
38:32I've designed this so I can change the size of it, I can extend it,
38:36I can make it smaller depending on what I want to do with it.
38:39Next stage is drill pilot holes into these centre ones.
38:43They are all going to fit together
38:45and it doesn't really matter which one fits into what.
38:47One day it might look a little bit to the left,
38:49one day it might look a bit to the right, upside down,
38:52but ultimately they're all going to fit together
38:54and the purpose is going to be that I can use it as decking, which I can.
38:58It doesn't matter how it really looks.
39:00I think that's very much the kind of person I am.
39:02I've never been one to get caught up on it being perfect.
39:07With the measurements and design finished,
39:09it's time to bring the prototype all together.
39:16It's the risky bit because of the splitting.
39:19These ones are going in a dream.
39:22Last one.
39:24I'm really chuffed with this, it looks great.
39:26When you see the finished piece, it makes it all worth it.
39:29And given this wood that would have potentially gone to landfill
39:32or burnt or something, I'm turning it into something useful.
39:35One down, seven to go.
39:38And with that, May is one step closer to being fully decked out.
39:46Moored up in High Lane on the Macclesfield Canal
39:49and on their way back from the park,
39:51Vic and Joe meet the crew of a familiar floating pizzeria.
39:56Hey, neighbour.
39:57How you doing?
39:58Yeah, good.
39:59That's pretty good.
40:00That's an impressive-sized kitchen.
40:02Yeah, it is.
40:03Can I have a look?
40:04It's warm in here.
40:05Is it?
40:06The fire's on.
40:07Wow.
40:08Oh, my gosh.
40:10You've cheated out of your full kitchen.
40:13That's an incredible amount of surface space.
40:16It's nice and warm, though, isn't it?
40:18Whilst Joe takes a look around the waltzing Matilda,
40:21Vic is moving their cafe boat, Holly,
40:24to a perfect position to open tomorrow.
40:27We're this side of the bridge now.
40:29We think it might be probably a better position
40:31on the other side of the bridge.
40:33That's where waltzing Matilda boat are.
40:35And I think there's another boat that's just pulled up,
40:38might be selling crochet and stuff like that.
40:40So there's a bit of a trader market vibe happening over there.
40:44So even though it's only a short distance,
40:46we might just move over there and join in,
40:49hopefully, if the engine works.
40:52Yes.
40:54With the engine thankfully working,
40:56they can move the boat towards the waltzing Matilda
40:59and grab a slice of the action.
41:03Oh, my goodness, this dough is so soft, isn't it?
41:06So it's very airy.
41:08And what your goal is, is to try and keep the air in it.
41:11So you want to get the air into the crust,
41:14so the crust will rise.
41:16And then I tend to...
41:18Because it's quite strong, you pick it up,
41:20flex your hand a bit.
41:22It's delicious.
41:24That looks good, doesn't it?
41:26It does.
41:28OK.
41:30Go a tad more, only because it will dry out.
41:32The oven's really hot, that keeps it...
41:34And then a sprinkle of this?
41:36Yeah, just a little drizzle of that.
41:38There we go. That's it.
41:40That's all right? Yeah, perfect.
41:42Ready? Go for it.
41:44And while Joe savours the aromas of a hand-crafted pizza,
41:48Vic is dealing with something altogether different.
41:52Bins are, like, the big deal.
41:56Cos you can't keep them.
41:58It just means we end up doing a lot of long canoe trips.
42:01Vic needs to prep the boat for tomorrow's trading
42:04and it's currently a bit of a mess.
42:07Joe's been baking in here this morning
42:10and actually she's been making the dough
42:12non-stop for the past couple of days,
42:14just making cakes.
42:16So it's a little bit still in that mode.
42:19That's the thing with having a business like this
42:21in such a small space,
42:23it kind of still is two or three things at once,
42:26cos it's a kitchen where Joe bakes, like, quite a lot of cakes.
42:30And, you know, then it's got to be a cafe and stuff like that,
42:33so sometimes we're a bit on top of each other
42:36and there's been occasions when Joe's baking
42:40while we're serving, you know, and then we start to run out of cake
42:43and Joe's like, I think I can get another one out,
42:45I think I can do another one.
42:47And so she'll start doing that while I'm making coffees and stuff
42:50and then it's all a bit like...
42:52We're good at that, though, thankfully.
42:54We've lived on boats for a long time now,
42:56so we're quite good at the whole sort of Tetris
42:58of, like, moving round each other while each other are doing stuff.
43:01So that's good.
43:04And boating isn't Vic's only passion.
43:07He's got a real nose for coffee.
43:10I also thought that getting a hold of coffee
43:12and finding coffee roasters and suppliers
43:14was going to be like a real headache, and it's actually like a total joy.
43:17It's so nice, cos people are doing it locally.
43:20I didn't realise what kind of little micro-roastery industry
43:23there was in this country.
43:24People are doing it in their garages and stuff like that.
43:27Before William came along, this was it.
43:29Now this is like my second child.
43:31Now that Vic's second child is fully prepped for tomorrow
43:34and with grandparents looking after his firstborn,
43:36it's time to try one of Joe's pizzas.
43:38Hello!
43:40Pizza Delivery.
43:41Oh!
43:42This is Mark Two.
43:43Oh! Right, right.
43:45She's given herself ten out of ten for this one.
43:48She's tied down.
43:49Oh, wow!
43:50She's getting better, isn't she?
43:52It's pretty impressive, yeah.
43:53And where better to tuck in than their brand new spot, Canal Side.
43:57She's doing a good job.
43:58I bet you want to cry when the last piece of dough goes out
44:00and there's none left for you.
44:01We just got a Chinese takeaway.
44:03You get 20 quid up until you go and get a Chinese takeaway.
44:06Do you get people then from quite far away
44:09to come and visit you?
44:11We've had a few weird ones.
44:13I mean, most of our customers are local
44:15and then some come from a little bit further afield.
44:17I think the furthest we've had, though, was Norway.
44:20She'd followed us from the start of our Covid journey
44:24and she was always messaging me,
44:26but I didn't clock on she was from Norway.
44:28One day she was like,
44:29I've got a ticket, I've got a plane ticket,
44:31I'm coming to see you.
44:32Wow, that's amazing.
44:33Yeah, it was here actually, in High Lane she came.
44:36And I felt really bad, I was like,
44:38I hope it lives up to her expectations.
44:40Yeah.
44:41You've come all this way for a pizza, I hope it's good enough.
44:44And hoping they can meet their customers' expectations,
44:47Vic and Joe are ready for tomorrow.
44:52Next time, angry boater Joel prepares for a landmark show.
44:56If you fancy coming, next Friday.
44:58May tests out her DIY decking.
45:00It's definitely higgledy-piggledy, I can feel it,
45:02but that doesn't matter.
45:04And Vic and Joe open for business.