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  • 5/20/2025
Grosse Pointe Garden Society Season 1 Episode 12

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Transcript
00:00how everything just got out of control so fast i gotta get gas with a dead person in the trunk
00:06i've never heard of anyone getting killed the way that you've just described show me maybe i will
00:12take that light every garden needs to be left fallow for a season
00:18you let the soil rest so it can come back stronger in the spring
00:34it's the only way for the garden to transition from death to new life
00:40keith oh my god check his pulse help me put pressure on the wounds
00:49there's so much blood keith keith wake up i can't find a pulse
00:55keith come on move there's no pulse oh my god just keep keep putting pressure i am i am
01:00keith come on move something just anything guys oh my god oh god oh please guys please oh please
01:08oh god please why'd you do cpr too late or wait what about there's um the paddle thing that
01:16doesn't put the blood back in people he's gone call 9-1-1 okay wait wait wait wait
01:26let's think about this think about what we're gonna say
01:29what send an ambulance i mean about what happened it was an accident yeah well it doesn't look like
01:35one but it was our prints are all over his body because we were trying to save him or we pushed
01:46what didn't happen tell that to a jury we're on trial now we will be if we don't think this through
01:54but it's the right thing to do okay then what
01:58with the quilt and the wood chipper i mean i at best it's manslaughter
02:04like we literally slaughtered a man on accident that still puts us behind bars
02:09yeah you want to never see your kids again
02:14alice oh fine yeah i'll call no alice wait alice alice wait wait what did you tell patty
02:23huh to get her down here what did you text her
02:30first i said get your ass down to mac avenue garden center okay that's not so bad i mean
02:37it's a little aggro but and then i might have said i'm gonna take away what you love the most
02:48oh no jesus i met the quilt but it sounds like her husband
02:54i met the quilt but it sounds like her husband
03:00here goes manslaughter now what do we do mom she hasn't read it yet she will when the cops
03:08wake her up to say her husband's dead we can't call anyone else we can't we can't
03:15but he's my father-in-law i have to either way we're going to his funeral
03:21oh you want to go to jail too
03:32i don't think i want to guard him anymore
03:40why me if we get pulled over you're the drunk friend who needs a ride home
03:45oh you sure we shouldn't just try the lake no better to hide in plain sight please
03:56guarding makes the most sense yeah we decide what gets planted and how deep
04:05oh it's patty don't answer it what if it's an emergency
04:16oh
04:19sweetie it's too late for ipad daddy didn't close my closet addison
04:28monsters don't hide in the closet
04:38nowhere i'll ever let you be when are you coming home soon baby
04:42come home now only if you go to sleep okay mommy love you love you so much
04:55okay no more facetimes purses phones
05:02put them in here
05:12oh showtime drunk friend
05:28i know this might sound weird but
05:33try to take care of him
05:38we will
05:42hey it's lexi leave a message hey baby it's me i know you said you needed some space but uh
05:57i meant to congratulate you on all your new followers people are really eating up all your
06:02bartending content also couldn't help but notice you got a lot of men following you but hey you're
06:08a fierce woman if any of those creeps slide into your dms i know you'll be smart about it
06:14anyway it's looking like a slow night so if you get bored or anything hit me up uh whatever bye
06:39so
06:47hey man help us out well what do you need beer yeah my buddy and i forgot our ids at home
06:59i don't know i could get arrested come on well give me some i don't drink
07:09okay uh what about weed do i look like i do drugs
07:14well you don't look like you'd turn them down that's funny
07:19just get the hell out of here all right y'all are spoiled pricks go
07:25let's go dude all right dude good god dude am i crazy or did that guy smell hella good
07:31i thought the same thing yeah like uh like cologne but super fancy
07:37hey let's try this ass all right hey lady
07:47bro that's your fake mom
08:00okay stick it back onto the brick
08:07but this is bananas no matter what happens she can never read that text
08:16okay so keith came downstairs to make a quesadilla it has to be here somewhere right there
08:21oh
08:27um tried dog's birthday zero nine two five nine one
08:35god damn it think maybe maybe her street address that's not enough numbers
08:40honey what are you doing you better not be eating again
08:51oh
09:06what are you doing i let myself in i didn't mean to scare you
09:12uh what time is it late um is doug here uh no no we sent him to the cabin
09:22um you know i was uh i was worried uh well don't be his dad is uh is joining him tomorrow
09:33it is keith car in the driveway
09:37i didn't see it that man is always at some fast food drive through stuff in his face
09:47thinking i won't wake up
09:51well since uh no one's sleeping how about some tea
09:57i feel terrible uh
10:06about what happened tonight it was embarrassing for everyone
10:14is doug okay you really care he's still my husband
10:26then let's talk honestly for once okay can't fake a marriage alice doug
10:37means everything to me that doesn't mean there isn't some tiny bit of room
10:42for someone else i've never cheated patty but if you stay in this game long enough
10:48and there's bound to be another man who gets you better than your husband
10:56i
11:00had to go let's just get out of here what if we had to make a slight detour first
11:07what okay so remember when you were in high school and your parents were like if you ever
11:14get drunk at a party we'd rather you call us and drive home and we promise you won't get punished
11:19and then you fall for it and you get grounded for like a month and then that's like the last
11:23time you ever call them for anything ever again what
11:35are you kidding they're out here wasted trying to buy beer why is that our problem
11:40because they could get arrested i'm sorry but how is that more important than us going to prison
11:49because i want him to know that he can count on me
11:54or you could just get a new garden intern
12:04he might be more than just a garden intern
12:13that's not what's going on come on wife to wife no
12:20so you mean to tell me that you have no feelings whatsoever for your friend
12:27not even a pang patty oh come on i mean let's just lay the cards on the table okay you're right
12:39which part
12:40um which part
12:44maybe there is something else with brett that um just ignored
12:58all this real talk is making me hungry
13:02you want a burger keith says the calories don't really count between midnight and 8 a.m
13:11oh you know what i can't read a damn thing without my glasses
13:18don't get old alice
13:31uh so what do you want i'm good oh you mean to tell me you don't do fries with that metabolism
13:42i'm just exhausted well marriage will do that to you alice okay it's long and hard and complicated
13:55but if you're faking it you're not in it
14:02i'm in it patty
14:07it took me a long time to appreciate what i have in keith
14:19uh you'll never know how sorry i am about what happened tonight
14:27okay
14:29don't waste all that time if it isn't right
14:37okay
14:42but i might leave him if he doesn't text me back about those fries
14:50thank you never let him see you young brother
14:53well old nights are kicking my ass you gotta embrace it you gotta be one with the darkness
14:58we're not killing vampires babysitting drunks that's how you want to see it well it's not
15:04going to get me to division chief you got half the town at that charity event tonight
15:09so what well think about it you got a bunch of rich people all being rich together what is the
15:16worst that can happen oh come on man listen every case that comes through that door could be the
15:21one to get your feet on the ladder lady witnessed some kind of fight at the gala two guys trashed the
15:26place see there you go
15:42our crew is counting on us not my problem we can't show up empty-handed
15:48dude your mom's fire i think your friend's had enough to drink you're in for a go-to
15:59lovely all i'm saying is i think there's a real opportunity here
16:06this is your moment to decide what kind of mom you want to be lame mom or cool mom how about just mom
16:15oh flame
16:19oh my god there's a phone yeah that's how calls work
16:24who's wifey uh just a friend who you call wifey what do we do send it to voicemail
16:40whose car is this
16:41guys i don't feel too good open the window it's locked
16:49locked
17:08did you guys steal this car
17:12one six-pack
17:19so
17:26i'm sorry
17:50they should be here by now oh god what do we do
17:55take your breath
18:19hey leave a message
18:30hey lexi stop stalking me all you have to do is pick up your phone did you put another
18:38tracker on my car yeah that's what i do for a living go back to work hey uh everything okay
18:45here none of your business tough guy he's my boss i'll be inside if you need me
18:57why are you working so late on a school night because i can't pay tuition dad
19:01what about that birthday check i sent you that covered like one book how much do you need
19:08don't worry about it that's why i'm here because i worry about you
19:12awesome i'll get you a world's greatest dad t-shirt just give me another shot bourbon or
19:19tequila i'm not that person anymore oh you moved on to scotch okay okay fair enough truce please
19:34so
19:41fine how much is tuition you can't afford it that's my problem not yours
19:55just don't break my heart again
20:04so
20:08i'm sorry about your car that's okay i don't
20:13okay thank you
20:18for uh
20:21whosever it is how are you getting home
20:28uh i've been crashing here for a little while actually
20:30why why my mom's pissed at me what'd you do this time
20:42i told her that i want to hang with you more
20:47oh
20:51i'd like that
20:57thanks for being so cool
21:01okay okay love you what oh no not in a weird way that was like no yeah hey man love you
21:10you get it okay i'm gonna go okay
21:22dude she got us non-alcoholic
21:31i'm sorry about all that
21:38it's okay
21:41i didn't know what to do
21:46you did what any good mom would do
21:49so
21:59you really think we're gonna get away with all this
22:04they don't have a choice
22:13i mean even if they did get pulled over for something it doesn't mean they got arrested
22:18but if they didn't get arrested why wouldn't they be here oh man
22:35let's say we get through this okay then what what do you mean how how are we supposed to wake
22:44up tomorrow and make breakfast with this seared in our brains i don't know here's an omelet doug
22:53would you like a fork like the pickaxe that was in your dad or maybe a spoon to
23:00shovel some sugar over your cereal like the the dirt that i dumped on your dad
23:10you guys eat big breakfast
23:14but he was right about me the same woman who shot your dog
23:27you're a good friend
23:33thank god wait it's not them
23:37hmm what do you mean it's a cop
23:51this is not good
24:07so
24:15attention lovebirds this is private property so you don't have to go home but you should go home
24:37so
24:58did you mean what you said to patty
25:00it doesn't matter kind of our lives are already a mess just answer the question and then what
25:12i don't know but we pretend like like i'm not married
25:20and that we're not about to bury my father-in-law
25:23oh it's about time
25:42what are we gonna do about their car
25:48take it to one of those chop shops downtown parts get sold off across the country
25:52what about dna strip the fabric from the trunk
25:58that uh that only takes care of the blood
26:04what about the back seat
26:08who's in the back seat
26:12oh dude oh god it's everywhere
26:21uh wifey oh god it's patty again
26:28you gotta text her something no okay her next call is gonna be the cops
26:41what do i say whatever buys us the most time
26:47so
26:51it's not the worst thing we've done tonight yeah yeah yeah we'll do it together okay
27:18so
27:37wait where's the phone and where's bernie
27:40we made a deal i know no more secrets
27:57have you been up all night still can't sleep you're gonna pass out during your soccer game today
28:05none of the monsters eat me first okay where are they
28:24sorry just your jacket did you check under the bed no oh they love it down there
28:35oh
28:39puppy i've been looking for him yeah
28:49can i ask you something
28:53why would a monster want to eat you they did something bad
28:58everyone does bad things i spilled my juice box on daddy's laptop oh well that sounds like an
29:07accident but i blamed julie well what did daddy say they need a new babysitter he was just upset
29:19should i tell him it was me
29:21should i tell him it was me
29:26well
29:31it won't fix his laptop
29:39just because you do a bad thing doesn't make you a bad person
29:51so
29:58can i help you ma'am
30:01i'm here to see joel you a friend i was follow me
30:21so
30:39come on open up zoe has to go to the bathroom
30:42hey come here
30:54daddy i gotta pee i can't breathe i know i just missed you guys you just saw them yesterday
31:05wow how late were you out
31:08oh i lost track oh who were you with friends who
31:20i don't even remember i had a lot to drink
31:28is that why you pulled me on the dance floor
31:29is that why you pulled me on the dance floor
31:33huh because you were so drunk
31:40i'm just like
31:44really freaked out yeah maybe too melissa that doesn't mean that we can't
31:52um maybe we shouldn't just jump into this what's that mean
32:06uh it's complicated okay well you seem to have it all figured out last night well
32:14i'm not in the best place right now
32:16are you serious
32:24it wouldn't be fair to you you know i just i kind of can't understand what changed literally
32:29overnight nothing i could ever explain
32:37okay thanks for the update oh wait no you know you don't have to do the whole like it's not you
32:44it's me thing i i get it no i highly doubt that come on it was a stupid idea anyways why
32:54we were never gonna fix something this broken right
33:15so
33:33oh
33:44marilyn whoa just slow slow down slow down okay what no i haven't listened to your voicemail yet
33:52i oh my god oh okay okay okay i'm coming
34:14my friends and i sort of murdered someone
34:26all right
34:29let's do this
34:32now would you rather wait till the store is open we cleaned everything trust me
34:39there's always evidence
34:45i really don't want to go back there i'm sorry but uh
34:52i'm really gonna need you to walk me through it
34:56can't i just tell you how to get inside
35:00homicide's still gonna need your statement why do we need to involve them
35:04because that's what happens when you're charged with murder
35:12i was sort of hoping that we could keep this just between the two of us let me get this
35:18straight you rip out my heart and now you expect me to help you can't i just owe you a favor you
35:25then spiked it on the ground while it was still barely beating and then you stomped all over it
35:32for sport okay i could have handled that differently yeah i've got notes i needed
35:39to make sure that you wouldn't come back mission accomplished because i would have wanted you to
35:45and then we would have had tons of hot sex because there is no other kind with us
35:49and then i would have felt terrible and broken up with you again and then more hot sex except
35:53now it's even hotter because you're mad and the cycle just repeats itself over and over again
35:59like a snake eating its tail and what is wrong with that it's not fair to everyone
36:08you know you could have just broken up with me over a text
36:11like a normal person there's nothing normal about this joel
36:21it's good you came in first the da will take it easy and you'll do less time than your friends
36:26i can't sell them out it's the only way to avoid a long sentence i can't do that either
36:31you might surprise yourself they've got toilet wine i can't have our baby behind bars
36:57so
37:05probably would have covered up a murder for you anyway
37:09that's not the only reason i told you
37:19how the hell are we gonna do this
37:21i don't know but i know i only want to do it with you
37:33and you're a hundred percent sure that it's oh god nothing happened with my ex well you're
37:39such a good liar well then why don't you give me that polygraph
37:51so
37:59they only had decaf freshly brewed
38:04my fave um thank you so much for meeting me on short notice
38:11i didn't know if you'd be hungry oh maybe later
38:14so this is gonna sound a little bit strange the guy that you've been following for my husband
38:22that boy brett
38:25what exactly have you found on him
38:33not a damn thing
38:34not a damn thing
38:44oh sorry no to your chair no i don't have to
38:50did you get any sleep no
39:05i think we'll ever be the same maybe someday i meant us
39:19oh hey has anyone heard from birdie just go straight to voicemail
39:27and why is marilyn calling goddamn meeting so early shouldn't she be at home with her goddamn
39:31cat how are we ever gonna get the quilt back we're not how are we ever gonna get that phone back
39:39or not
39:49there's just no way this ends well everything leads back to us
39:57so when a garden goes fallow it may seem like there's nothing to do
40:09it's time to wake up stop calling it love it's time to get even though it just looks
40:19like a bunch of empty soil it's actually the most crucial time
40:32the slightest misstep like adding too much fertilizer can create problems for generations
40:38to come
40:44looks like she bought it
40:47so we dump it in some frozen lake by their cabin no he's not going ice fishing
40:53where's he going shopping for what his new life
41:02that's why you have to be willing to roll up your sleeves and get your hands dirty
41:09so
41:13whatever it takes to protect the garden you love

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