Therapy Thursday: Falling Back Into The Same Negative Relationships

Beasley Digital

Transcript

00:00which therapist you need therapy thursday now on wild 94.1 i understand therapy hi everybody

00:05all right it's the freak show therapy thursday well we just talk it out and some people got

00:10some things they got going on they'd rather hear it out loud it does help uh sometimes it ain't

00:15brilliant but we make our way through it all right we got callers and texts what we got sometimes

00:20yeah the best way is just to talk about it and that's what this no name out of lakeland i think

00:24wants to do good morning you are live with the freak show oh yeah man i've been with my girl

00:30about a year and a half so recently about about three months ago i've seen her texting some other

00:36guy and we haven't been having intercourse i just want y'all to like do y'all think i should leave

00:42or try to work it out how long how long ago did you find the text about two two months ago and it's

00:50like we're like roommates or something do you have any context to the text like what it what it is

00:55say is there any way it could have been innocent he was telling the other guy that um basically that

01:03i'm just a roommate we're not having sex and all this type of stuff and so it's factual though because

01:10you did say it feels like you're a roommate and you're not having intercourse so she was being

01:14factual so does that mean are you guys at a point right now where you you know it's pretty much done

01:22um i mean we still live together we still do all of the things we're just not intimate you know like

01:32you know i'm a man i need something and before i go run off and go do it i'm trying to make it work

01:37but yeah and if it's not working then i mean you know i'm just trying to figure it out should i

01:44just give up or should i just keep trying because we're i don't know if it's visible it seemed like

01:50it is but some days it just seemed like it's just this old as a man you need you said you need sex

01:56and i'm telling you she needs it too um because apparently if she's looking i mean both so if you

02:01guys want to fix it you can but realistically you need to figure out if it's worth fixing go ahead

02:06dami i'm sorry to cut you off i was gonna say sometimes like as a man if you get shut down a

02:11couple times then you kind of stop trying and you you stop you you get frustrated and things like

02:17that are you at the point in your relationship now that it's been so long that you're not putting in

02:23the effort because you already have a feeling you know where it's gonna go um some days you know

02:30some days i'm still trying and these they'll give me an excuse about like he's having mental

02:38problems or something like that but i'm figuring if you have a mental problem why are you texting

02:43another guy okay and have you brought this up just to clarify have you brought up the text to her at

02:48all oh definitely okay and she's still texting uh that i don't know you know okay here's what here's

02:57what you do now so apparently she might still be oh yeah it sounds like here's what here here's what

03:01you do both of you guys since she knows you saw it both you guys have sit down and have a conversation

03:05say hey man listen i saw the text we know it uh it's truthful because we're not having intercourse

03:10and you know we do feel like roommates is this worth us moving forward both of us need to make a

03:17decision because either we can make a clean break or we can really invest in this and and and both put

03:22the work in it's on both of us we'll make that decision and just move forward because we believe

03:29in this or not either way it go you know both of y'all are showing that y'all need something that

03:34you're not getting so if you can fix it you can move forward if not then you know y'all break up but

03:38make a decision together and i hope that works out for you pimping good luck bro yeah i think the only

03:43thing that's keeping us together is this lease you know i think that might be it too but that's

03:49part of the conversation no no need to think about any of this stuff because y'all are both grown adults

03:53committed to a relationship sit down and figure out exactly where y'all are if it's about the least

03:58then make make that be known but but iron it out together yeah appreciate that all right that's

04:05funny man a lot of people have stayed together just to wait out at least it's expensive i'm not getting

04:10no bad credit and a bad relationship yo in certain senses it's like the responsible slash adult thing

04:16to do i don't know all right that's that's for another day we have chelsea on the line from

04:20lakeland what up chelsea chelsea are you there yes i'm here okay turn your radio down for me so we

04:28can hear you you're live on the air for therapy thursday what's your question okay well i recently

04:34just got out of a two-year relationship and right now i'm i don't know what i should do um

04:43we the first you know the first year was good or whatever and then the second you know

04:50towards the end it got bad well he asked me to move in with him and

04:55um your ex asked you to move in with him uh when we were dating okay okay but chelsea hold on now

05:04baby because you you said you started off with i was i was in a two-year relationship so you're not

05:10in this relationship now right no sorry about that yeah i currently i just ended a two-year

05:18relationship okay okay yeah and so when we was dating he asked me to move in with him and then

05:26he had to go upstate for work well um then he accused me of cheating while he was uh going up

05:35there to work so i we sat down and talked about it over the phone and he's like i think you're

05:39cheating on me and i was like no i'm not cheating on you i promise like you can have all my passwords

05:43and everything so then uh two days later he calls me again and he's like i still think you're cheating

05:51on me and i'm like well i'm not and he lived with a roommate and the roommate i guess was telling him

06:00that i was i was going out you know dressed like a horse oh you know like provocative and i was like

06:10what no so i don't i just need an opinion like here's my opinion chelsea chelsea my opinion is

06:17you're not in the relationship anymore that's where that was the whole point you said i was in

06:21a two-year relationship you're not in it anymore so why are we even discussing what happened when

06:26y'all were in the relationship he accused you of cheating you're not in it anymore so why not just

06:32find something else going on instead of talking about what used to be no yeah i you know i still have

06:39feelings for him or whatever but i just don't know if i should go back to that or okay i've dealt

06:44with this before first of all you don't want somebody you don't want to be with somebody that

06:48lets a friend in on your relationship first of all second of all he's talking about how you should

06:52dress and shouldn't dress no that's a big no been there done that don't put up with that third of all

06:57you guys are broken up for a reason and just because it's convenient and yes you can hook up again but

07:02it doesn't mean you're growing and finding somebody better out there are y'all currently still seeing each

07:06other um yeah yeah yeah and by the way it sounds like he's projecting he could be the one that's

07:14actually cheating and then just saying it's you because that happens all the time you don't don't

07:19know don't dig so deep into this there's only one of them responses and it's the fact that if you left

07:23for a reason don't go back don't don't get delivered from egypt and then go back to the beach all

07:27right just i mean you've been delivered moses kept moving keep it moving girl you ain't got you don't go

07:33back i mean and i know you're going to do what you want to do because that's what we do but we're

07:37just telling you advising you're hearing what you said you jumped immediately into the relationship

07:43after saying i'm not in it so it's like you're in your mind you're still in it and you want to be

07:48there be there but i i would say keep it pushing you can find a better person thanks for calling

07:52chelsea good good luck with all that what a mess i know it sounds like young love remember when you

07:57were dumb and young not that she's stupid but i'm just saying somebody just texted the same thing

08:02she sounded like she's 20 yeah it's like that you know because young love you do really silly

08:06stuff like that like like say hey i ain't in a relationship but when we was together it's like

08:10i know you look back on you're like why did i even put up with that right silly silly i think we did

08:15good what y'all think i think we did okay yeah i think we did all right man we told everybody out

08:20there that is unsure get out yeah go run go run run as fast as you can run

08:27sorry

08:33you

08:34a

08:37all right

08:39you

08:40s

08:43it

08:43say

08:44you

08:45you

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