"My mom put my brothers and I on a 'husbands in training' course"

SWNS

A man says his mom put him and his brothers through a 'husbands in training' course aged eight to make them better partners.  Douglas Weaver, 36, and his two brothers would arrive home from school to find their mom, Nana Mickey, sitting and waiting to question them about what they learned.   While they were in lessons, Douglas' mom would listen to the radio and read books to be as informed as she could for when her two children returned home from school.  She set about teaching her boys how to be good partner - putting them through a 'husbands in training' course she devised herself.   They would learn everything from healthy communication skills, etiquette, consent and all about the porn industry.

Transcript

00:00So, when I was a kid, my mom did this thing for me and my two older brothers called Husbands

00:05in Training.

00:06That's what she called it.

00:07It was a full, like, multiple year curriculum on how to be a better husband.

00:13It covered everything from eating etiquette to chivalry to, like, the ethics of the porn

00:21industry.

00:22Just anything you can think of.

00:25Some of it was too much.

00:27I remember one thing in particular.

00:28It was called the Porn Quiz.

00:29I think I still have it on one of my old laptops.

00:32It was a quiz about the porn industry and it was too much.

00:36But there was a lot of really good stuff in that curriculum.

00:39There were things like what to do if your spouse says something and the information

00:46that they give is wrong.

00:48How to handle it if they say something wrong in public versus in private.

00:53When it is appropriate to correct them and when it isn't.

00:56We talked about consent.

00:58We talked about just the basics of respecting and honoring women and listening to women

01:07and all of the things that really just make you a decent human being.

01:13And then when I was in high school, my dad realized a lot of the things that we were

01:17learning from my mom were things that he was never taught growing up.

01:23And so he decided he also wanted to take Husbands in Training.

01:26So myself, my brothers, and my dad were all learning how to be better men from my mom

01:32through this Husbands in Training course.

01:34And my mom even made certificates of completion that she signed and gave to each of us on

01:43our wedding day.

01:45There are parts of this curriculum that should never see the light of day.

01:49Like the Porn Quiz.

01:52There's a lot in it that I think I will revive to do with my son.

01:57I'm definitely raising my son to understand how consent works and that the necessity for

02:01consent doesn't end when you get married.

02:04That things still need to be consensual.

02:06Identifying when women are in distress or in danger because of other men and when to

02:14intervene and how to appropriately intervene.

02:17Healthy conflict resolution and how to express your feelings in a healthy way and appropriate

02:24ways to respond when someone expresses their feelings to you.

02:28Because I gotta say, my brothers and I, we're all married, and I think all three of our

02:33wives really appreciate the hard work that my mom did trying to raise some decent men.

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