Dolphins DE Jaelan Phillips documents Racoon activities in the wild

WQAM-AM / AM 560 Sports WQAM

JFig informs us of Dolphins DE Jaelan Phillips testing his internal intangibles activities in the wild... we take a look at the video series.

Transcript

00:00So JP alerted us to this earlier, but are you doing synchronized swimming this evening, JP?

00:06No.

00:10We have found Jalen Phillips and his shenanigans with a raccoon.

00:16I don't know.

00:16So he drove to an island first.

00:19Yeah.

00:21He's in Florida?

00:22Yeah, he's in Florida.

00:23He went on a boat ride to an island and then he got off.

00:26You went to our guy's island, right?

00:29With the animals.

00:30Todd Faber from Jungle Queen?

00:32Yeah.

00:33I think he just went to some random island.

00:34It looks like he was on the island.

00:36Yeah.

00:37You know?

00:44You know, I don't think I'm gonna get any closer to you.

00:47I'm not sure if you're hot or a rabbit.

00:52You look kind of crazy.

00:57And why does everybody think that's the official noise to call an animal?

01:01And also, he doesn't want to get near it.

01:04I'm not going to get closer to you, but let me try woodland creature calls.

01:06Like I'm Snow White.

01:08Pretty much.

01:09The magical part of him coming out.

01:11It's coming out.

01:12Why?

01:12Oh no, but it will continue.

01:13He went, go, let's go.

01:15That's a good raccoon.

01:23Imagine the dolphin season being taken.

01:25Hello, friend.

01:27Now they're friends.

01:29You know how they kill their prey, right?

01:31They jump on their back and rip the guts out.

01:33I'm doing it.

01:37See, I talked to him like a few times.

01:39Oh, he's coming closer.

01:40I'm gonna run.

01:42See him backing up?

01:43See, I don't get it.

01:44How are you going to say hi, my friend, and then not start backing up?

01:47Now you're a cornerback.

01:48Yeah, like, are you going to be a friend to the woodland creature?

01:51Hey, now, this would be the true sign, right?

01:56Because if we got to this point and we had some snacks, we'd be throwing the snacks,

02:06right?

02:06Go ahead on.

02:06And he said he's officially intangibly close.

02:17Hey, hey, so right now, me and Vlad would be throwing the little pretty treats at him,

02:24right?

02:25That's what I'm out right now.

02:31The inner intangible is coming out because he started giving.

02:34No, it was coming out the way he was talking to him.

02:36It was so nice.

02:38I love how you know, Leroy, I love how every intangible always say the animal looks so

02:44nice and friendly.

02:44He does look friendly.

02:45So right before they get right before they get you, that's the lure to attack you.

02:51You don't see us saying, oh, he looks so nice.

02:54It's like, all right, I'm about to bounce.

02:56You know what I mean?

02:57Like, okay, he's not he's not bothering me.

02:59Every time Keith come over to my house, I say, hey, you ain't got to worry about Zeus

03:04Biden.

03:05You go.

03:05You got teeth, don't he?

03:18Are you friendly like the person like the animal talks?

03:24He's like, are you friendly?

03:26He's looking up like, wow, that's the part that I was referring to.

03:30That is a big ass.

03:32Inner intangible was coming.

03:33I was screaming.

03:34So did he hand feed him?

03:36No.

03:36So yeah, he think about that.

03:46This is all racially wrong.

03:51But no, no, no.

03:52Notice, check this out.

03:53He ate the watermelon first.

03:54That's what I'm saying.

03:55That was his black part.

03:56Yeah, even the raccoon.

03:59No, you ain't giving him nothing.

04:01Jalen.

04:01I'm ass piece.

04:03Yeah, I walked all the way, climbed out of the tree.

04:06Come over there.

04:06You gonna give me a watermelon, Ryan?

04:08Not and you ate it.

04:11I'm out.

04:13He was testing the waters first.

04:15So wait a minute.

04:16So let me let me say this.

04:18Intangibly close.

04:20Like when he was taken, when he was recording from afar, right?

04:26He was on the edge when he stuck that watermelon, Ryan out to have him come grab it.

04:31No, no, it's actually another part after this video.

04:36Oh, where's the other part?

04:37I gotta get it.

04:38It's basically he's giving water to the raccoon.

04:44The raccoon.

04:45Wait, he's trying to hydrate the raccoon.

04:48Yeah, he wants it as a pet.

04:49Like, the thing is, I think he names it Henry or something.

04:54Forgot.

04:55Horse.

04:57He named it.

04:57Logan says the show is bringing us together.

05:01Hey, there's nothing wrong with being different, right?

05:07Like Tobin, you would feed the raccoon.

05:10I don't really trust raccoons very much.

05:13You guys have heard my story.

05:15The possum is a lot friendlier than the raccoon.

05:19And guess what happened?

05:20He wasn't.

05:20He didn't look.

05:22Calls it Henry.

05:24That's a difference.

05:26Look how close he is.

05:27Gave that possible.

05:28The dude smiling is the record smiling for the picture.

05:31Yeah, it's like they're doing a photo op.

05:34He's going.

05:39I hear you're beating science.

05:41You know what?

05:42Rehab must be a lonely.

05:46That's pretty good.

05:46Rehab must be lonely.

05:47You're trying to get a raccoon as a friend.

05:49It is, dude.

05:50It has to be.

05:52You can't do all the things all your friends are doing.

05:55I gotta be honest with you.

05:56And then there's the worst part.

05:57You can't even really be caught hanging out.

06:00Because everybody gonna accuse you of not doing the things you need to do to get healthy.

06:05So it becomes a lonely day.

06:08But how does Mike Riddell even on his day off?

06:10You know, Mike Riddell needs to bring this up in a meeting where he's like,

06:13okay, perhaps it was not clear about off day activities.

06:17Ladies and gentlemen, if you could look here, we would like you.

06:21We would like to disregard you hanging out with woodland creatures, especially suspicious ones.

06:27When your first question is, are you rabid?

06:34Yeah, I don't get that, bro.

06:35Everyone's gonna be looking at him like.

06:37And he's just gonna say, everybody goes, but I'm so alone.

06:40Oh, Jalen.

06:43Poor thing.

06:44You know what I gotta tell him?

06:45Get a girlfriend.

06:49Are you friendly is the first question that he just tells the little raccoon.

06:54Are you thirsty?

06:55He said, hey, he said, why don't you come over here and see Intangible?

07:00And then, no.

07:02We all know how this story ends.

07:05The Intangible go over there to pet him.

07:07Leroy was getting all them shots.

07:11I think at one point he even said, are you going to come home with me?

07:14It's an inner war.

07:15He had a civil war within his tangible side, intangible side, because he was like,

07:21are you friendly?

07:22Let me back up.

07:23That was his tangible side.

07:25But it's intangible.

07:26It's like, are you thirsty?

07:28You got to get going.

07:29Okay, so let me get this straight.

07:30I just want to be clear here.

07:31You think if this is Zach sealer, that raccoon is taking a piggyback ride on him.

07:36Zach sealer and the raccoon sitting on his shoulder.

07:39He's chilling on the shoulder and walking around with it.

07:42And he's eating the grapes.

07:44Here you go, little buddy.

07:45Everybody, this is Ricky the raccoon.

07:46What are you talking about?

07:47I just do a thing of Pocahontas, basically.

07:50Right, yeah.

07:50What you talking about?

07:52You're claiming Zach sealer is going to cradle it like a baby?

07:54Yeah, like baby blue Jesus.

07:58Like little baby blue Jesus.

07:59I'm telling you what, I just said, ain't nobody in my family

08:04ever thought about holding and playing with a squirrel.

08:07He had an internal kind of way.

08:08I had a squirrel in my house.

08:10That ain't my side.

08:13That ain't my side.

08:14He kept it alive for quite some time.

08:16But it wasn't like, yeah, okay.

08:19Notice you haven't seen any close pictures of the raccoon or the squirrel?

08:23No, it was from afar.

08:25Why?

08:26Every day I get up, why our house got to be the zoo?

08:28Your house is a zoo.

08:29I mean, you do have a lot of dogs now.

08:31We got four dogs, right?

08:34Hand-wielding creatures.

08:35Yep.

08:36Dr. Toboggan said he's got a lord going on inside, no man is safe from him.

08:42He's like, hey, hey, the football can't fit between my legs.

08:49There you go.

08:50When do we need it?

08:51Oh my goodness.

08:53Looks to me like a raccoon.

08:55I can see it now, the raccoon will be sitting on a seal's shoulder,

09:01braiding his beard, like cleaning it out.

09:04That's adorable.

09:06He might put in a stroller.

09:07Oh, yeah.

09:08Or a little backpacks.

09:10Yeah, a backpack.

09:12But listen, if an intangible could even try to walk into Publix with a possum on her shoulder,

09:19right?

09:19If an intangible could even try to walk into Publix with a possum on her shoulder,

09:24right?

09:25You've seen that video with the, can I keep him?

09:29There has to be one of these where Zack Sealer's in the meeting and he has the raccoon and a baby

09:33Bjorn feeding him granola bars and the defensive coordinator looks over and goes,

09:39are you going to keep that thing here the whole time?

09:42My friend.

09:45He's one of us now.

09:46Like Dr. Evil.

09:48And you know, and then the room is going to be divided racially,

09:52because all the black people are going to be way over on this side,

09:54and all the white people are going to be trying to pet him.

09:58Butter wants to pet him.

10:00What happens when a raccoon goes after a cake that they give the defense?

10:06I think he's going to have a little cake mustache.

10:11Possum would be great for hard knocks.

10:13Yeah.

10:14Yes, it would have been a good.

10:16That is something that is something a possum or a raccoon,

10:21somebody having that as a pet would divide the team racially.

10:26Kind of say a possum and a raccoon.

10:28One's much cuter than the other.

10:30Not really.

10:31Well, raccoons, but guess what?

10:33The more dangerous one is cuter.

10:35Oh, that's true.

10:36No, the raccoon is cuter.

10:39Possums are not dangerous, but they are nasty looking, which is why Josh doesn't.

10:43He didn't have a chance to tell you.

10:47That raccoon.

10:48Hey, that possum reads everything.

10:49Sir, I mean Newark.

10:51Time out.

10:52If you jazz chiseled him, that possum might be happy that you jazz chiseled him out of Miami.

10:57He's probably somewhere in New York right now, living the life.

11:00That possum living the life.

11:03Hey, man, I was up there in West Palm Beach, and it wasn't that good.

11:07Then this guy decided to take a bat and swing me right to New York,

11:10and look at me now.

11:10I'm in a pennant chase.

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