What's it like at a Karen's Diner?

The News, Portsmouth

Karen's Diner has arrived to Portsmouth. And our reporters got more than they bargained for

Transcript

00:00 *crowd cheers*

00:02 You *bleep* disgusting *bleep*

00:05 What's this?

00:07 You, come here!

00:09 Who else is it gonna be? You just got picked *bleep*

00:12 What's your name?

00:14 What went wrong?

00:16 Everything. Yeah, clearly.

00:18 How *bleep* is she getting away with this?

00:21 *music*

00:24 I'm a bit scared, I'm excited.

00:28 I wanna see how bad their customer service actually is

00:31 but all together I just can't wait.

00:33 *crowd noise*

00:35 There's quite a few people here.

00:37 There's four of us. Name?

00:39 Martine Kelly. *bleep*

00:41 *crowd noise*

00:43 *bleep*

00:45 *laughter*

00:47 Get out my way! Go stand there! Go, go, go!

00:50 *music*

00:53 Two burgers for table four.

00:55 Table four?

00:57 *music*

01:04 Faster than Benjamin Applegate.

01:06 *music*

01:18 *bleep*

01:20 *music*

01:22 Yeah, I was actually really nice in.

01:24 Yeah?

01:26 *crowd noise*

01:28 How are you?

01:30 You need to bring someone here and not tell them why.

01:33 *crowd noise*

01:39 How's the service been so far?

01:41 Disgraceful.

01:43 *laughter*

01:45 I really wouldn't recommend this restaurant.

01:47 I'm just trying to work up a note.

01:49 *laughter*

01:51 You're funny but you're not that funny for once.

01:53 *bleep*

01:55 *crowd noise*

02:16 It was fun!

02:18 Embarrassing.

02:19 But very fun.

02:21 Is it like your typical course of the night?

02:23 No, very different.

02:25 Very different.

02:27 Something we've never experienced.

02:29 Yay!

02:31 It's *bleep* trouble.

02:33 Very good.

02:35 Funny.

02:37 But we're really frightened of what they're going to say to us to be honest.

02:41 It's two equals four.

02:43 Do you want to keep pointing out *bleep* for yourself?

02:45 I was just saying it's good.

02:47 No you can't.

02:49 *laughter*

02:51 *crowd noise*

02:53 Please try me.

02:55 I feel like a new someone today.

02:57 Try me.

02:59 Who cares what you think.

03:01 Yeah it's good.

03:03 I like it.

03:05 A bit leery though.

03:07 Too leery.

03:09 No, leery.

03:11 *crowd noise*

03:25 Questions in the room?

03:27 How many legs does a cow have?

03:29 Four.

03:31 So can you stop wasting everyone's time and do it *bleep* quickly.

03:35 *laughter*

03:37 Did I force him to pick a cow?

03:39 No.

03:41 *bleep*

03:43 I bet you wish you took your 10,000 kilometres.

03:45 *laughter*

03:47 *crowd noise*

03:51 I've been married all this.

03:53 *crowd noise*

04:05 Look he's *bleep* sweating.

04:07 *bleep*

04:09 *bleep*

04:11 *bleep*

04:13 Did you just lift your leg and show a table of kids your *bleep* cobweb *bleep*

04:19 *laughter*

04:21 You're a hairdresser.

04:23 *bleep*

04:25 So my name's Paige. I run the events at Drift Southsea.

04:27 We've got Karen's Diner in today.

04:29 They're here to give you the worst day of your life.

04:31 The most crazy insights you can think of.

04:33 Definitely the queue along the street and people trying to come in to ask what's going on.

04:37 They've just been told to *bleep* which is what all the staff normally think.

04:41 Obviously we can't say.

04:43 *laughter*

04:45 I mean none of us really knew what to expect.

04:47 Even when they kind of arrived they were all really nice and smiley.

04:49 And then it was literally as soon as customers arrived it was like full Karen road.

04:53 So yeah.

04:55 Well I just wanted a beer. I kept saying can I have a beer.

04:57 I know you're going to say *bleep* but just please can I have a beer.

04:59 And needless to say I got to *bleep*

05:01 *laughter*

05:03 So how was the rest of it? How was the food? How was the atmosphere?

05:05 The food was awful. I just wanted some ketchup.

05:07 Turned out I had to walk all the way down to get my own.

05:09 But she did tell me it's not *bleep* though.

05:11 You've got to get your own.

05:13 It was very typical.

05:15 *laughter*

05:17 Does it live up to your expectations of what a typical Karen's Diner is about?

05:19 Well obviously you would come to this kind of establishment with no expectations.

05:23 Because you're only going to be let down one way or another.

05:25 *laughter*

05:27 I actually agree with that.

05:29 *laughter*

05:31 (laughing)

05:33 [BLANK_AUDIO]

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