When I opened my mailbox I had some letters I wondered who they could be from except debtors Petitioning for funds they had never received The first one had a different name and I was relieved
The government was looking for child support And I was wondering who was on the run and a dollar short Did they miss their family or were they Hiding in the Caribbean playing the piano and wearing a beret
The second letter was stamped “important information” When I tore it open it wasn’t asking for donation I realized it was at the wrong address It detailed some poor women’s abscess
I didn’t know how to get a hold of her And when it comes to this I’m no connoisseur But she must be out there lying in a lot of pain With her sheets and mattress in bloodstain
The third commanded me to open right away When I cut it open out came a rug I was to pray On and a ring I was to wear and a form To fill out to pass through the storm
If I sent it back they’d give me a coin And curse my enemies if I would join I put my neighbor’s name down when I was drunk So they could start getting all this junk
