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00:00I
00:30Oh, yeah, good boy, Johnny.
00:56Jokes we've stolen from other comedians to use in your show.
01:00Oh, terrific.
01:01No swearing, huh?
01:02No swearing to give from Don Rickles.
01:04I can't have any swearing, you understand?
01:07The Godfather has $50,000 from the Comic Relief Fund.
01:10Hey, good boy, Johnny.
01:11Hey, you're Johnny too, huh?
01:13Yeah.
01:13That was Johnny one, you're Johnny two.
01:15Yeah.
01:16I don't want this to go into Stephen Fry's pocket, you understand?
01:19Hey, Godfather, what do you want me to do with these?
01:22These go in the jacket pocket and my other coat, all right?
01:27Where do you want me, Godfather?
01:30John, you go in my pocket with all the others.
01:34Politicians and members of the clergy in the left pocket, union leaders in the right-hand pocket.
01:41It's always been the same.
01:43Hello.
01:44That's the controller.
01:46Controller, huh?
01:48Hello.
01:49Yeah.
01:50Yeah, the Godfather.
01:51Yeah.
01:52I'll be doing all the comedy spots from now on, you understand?
01:57Jasper Carrot, Man for Man Tee, French and so on.
02:00Why?
02:01Why am I doing the spots from now on?
02:04You got a TV set there?
02:06Watch the TV set.
02:07I'm going to tell you exactly why I'm doing the spots from now on, you understand?
02:11That's why I'm doing the spots from now on.
02:13I'm doing a Robert De Niro accent.
02:17So, what the f*** does it matter to you if I'm doing a Robert De Niro accent?
02:20The point is there, isn't it?
02:21You keep me off the TV screens, I'm going to do this to your mother.
02:24You understand that?
02:25All right?
02:26Bye.
02:26We'll be, uh, we'll be, uh, titles, titles, titles, oh, titles.
02:56See you next time!
03:26And no camera tricks.
03:52Moving right along, a small but live rabbit and no camera tricks.
04:00Next, a small but stuffed kitten and no camera trickery.
04:07Moving right along, a small stuffed but live dog.
04:12Blown it, blown it. Sorry, that was not part of the trick there.
04:16That was not the dog, the tart, the lesbian.
04:19OK, I'm going to start the sequence all over again, if you don't mind.
04:27Greetings, ladies and gentlemen, my name is Gerry Tadowitz.
04:29I'm a cross between Eric Morecambe and Ernie Wise.
04:31I'm dead boring.
04:34Now, I'm actually a cross between Ben Elton and a stand-up comedian.
04:40Wait, what's better than both the pet shop boys dying in a car crash?
04:45Absolutely nothing!
04:49Couple more bad gags I can hold up my own fruit shop, know what I mean?
04:52OK, I think I'll stick to the crappy card tricks, ladies and gentlemen.
04:55These card tricks are very alternative.
04:57What happens is, instead of you pick a card and I find it,
04:59what happens is you pick a card and you bloody well find it.
05:02I can tell just by the licks on your faces and the people at home,
05:06that what you people actually want is balloon animals.
05:09Am I right?
05:10Of course I am.
05:11I can pick up the vibes, no problem.
05:13Here we go, balloon animals.
05:15Hang on.
05:19Here's what I did earlier.
05:24Is there any feminists at home watching us who might be offended?
05:29You ain't seen nothing yet.
05:32It's only comedy, see?
05:34Comedy, see?
05:35Comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy.
05:37I actually hate feminists.
05:39They hate men so much.
05:40So how come they look like them?
05:41That's what I want to know, you know?
05:43See, women, they do really incredibly silly things,
05:45but you never get it reported in alternative comedy, you know?
05:47For example, women pluck their eyebrows out and then paint them back on with a crayon.
05:52Which doesn't smack her too much sense to my way of thinking, really, you know?
05:55I am actually a non-sexist, non-racist comedian,
05:57which is a hell of a shame to have a brilliant joke about Tina Turner,
06:00but there you go.
06:02Moving right along, a little trick utilizing my intestine.
06:05Aaaaaah!
06:08I was actually going to use Russell Grant's intestine,
06:11but we'd be here all night, really, so...
06:14Now then, gentlemen in the front row,
06:15if you'd like to examine that piece of rope for me, please?
06:18While you're doing that, I'll do the trick with this one.
06:22Maybe stupid, but I'm not a complete prat, you know what I mean?
06:25Most of the things you can't say and can say on the TV,
06:27you know, this is a television program, of course,
06:29and you can't say words beginning with C and ending with unt.
06:33You can't say the word tricks unless you say it backwards,
06:35in which case it's ideologically corrected, you know?
06:38Oh, okay.
06:41If you make a joke about women, it's sexist, right?
06:43If you make a joke about a black person that's racist,
06:45if you don't make a joke about a black person that's negative racism,
06:48because you haven't mentioned them at all, you know?
06:50If you make a joke about a bloody cup of tea, it's teest!
06:53You shouldn't make jokes about a cup of tea.
06:55My wife drinks tea.
06:56Why don't you make a joke about coffee?
06:58That's the naughty one.
06:59Coffee keeps you awake at night.
07:01Why don't you make jokes about Perrier?
07:03Perrier, very naughty.
07:04Take the piss out of Perrier.
07:05Take the piss out of Perrier.
07:06There'll be nothing left in the bottle, you know what I mean?
07:08You can't even make jokes about, like, deaf people, right?
07:12You can't even say deaf people anymore.
07:14You've got to say, orally challenged.
07:16I presume the person who invented that is mentally insufficient, you know?
07:21Probably also sexually indisposed at the same time, you know?
07:25So, I actually have a thing in London called comedy workshops,
07:29which I think gives you a good idea of just how bad things are getting in comedy, you know?
07:33A comedy workshop, what is that going to be like?
07:36Excuse me, I'd like to be funny, please.
07:38Certainly.
07:39Have you ever been funny before?
07:40No, no, I haven't.
07:41This is my first time.
07:42And, uh, what's your name?
07:43Uh, Davidson.
07:44Jim Davidson.
07:45And this is my wife, Ruby Wax.
07:48There'll soon be a situation where you can only do clean jokes,
07:51which I think will be very, very sad.
07:52Can you imagine what a clean joke would be like?
07:54Guy goes to the doctor, and that's it.
07:57An Irishman goes for a job on a building site, and he gets it.
08:00What's funny about that joke?
08:02How many feminists that take to change a lightbulb?
08:04Who cares?
08:05I live in the dark, all right?
08:07So, here we go.
08:09Cutting the rope with a pair of scissors, like so.
08:12We can actually cut the bloody rope.
08:14It'll be a miracle, you know?
08:15Okay, two pieces of rope.
08:16And I'm going to tie the two pieces of rope together with a single knot.
08:19And, uh, and apparently the second half of the trick takes years to master, ladies and gentlemen.
08:24Years to master.
08:25Okay, what else have we got?
08:27The BBC actually asked me originally, can I be funny without swearing?
08:31Jumping.
08:32No problem for the likes of me, you know.
08:36Silent her.
08:37There we go.
08:39Jumping silk.
08:41Yeah.
08:42I think I'll do that again, because it costs me 35 bloody quid, you know.
08:46Do it again until you applaud.
08:48Thank you very much indeed.
08:55Okay.
08:56No messing about now, ladies and gentlemen.
08:57Move us around now.
08:59I reckon I could've got about 50 quid for this down at the sperm bank, you know what I mean?
09:02I had a terrible nightmare last night.
09:05Winnie Mandela was doing a benefit gig to get me released.
09:12Still shite, still shite.
09:14Okay, what have we got here?
09:23Honest to God, I don't know what this is, you know.
09:26A friend of mine, Laurie, gave me this. 37 pounds, apparently.
09:29All I can make out is these two things are joined, you pull those two.
09:32How does it work?
09:34Oh, magnets, fair enough.
09:37No, and then I'm totally mad.
09:40Okay, what else we got?
09:42Okay, I think it's time for the small vanishing red handkerchief trick.
09:46I was just thinking recently about the swearing problem,
09:48things you can say and can't say on the TV.
09:50I was going to get round the problem by crossing the word unt with the word bastard,
09:54but then you get custard.
09:56Which is, er, it's legal, but it sounds absolute rubbish, I think, you know.
10:01So, I think we're missing the red handkerchief.
10:02Can I have a small red handkerchief, please?
10:05Yes, it's a telephone.
10:09Got it here.
10:10My lovely assistant tonight, Miss Dreena Darrell.
10:14Yes, very good.
10:15Thank you very much, Dreena.
10:16Can I have the small red handkerchief, please?
10:18No.
10:19What do you mean, no?
10:20No, because you're a sexist little bastard.
10:21I heard you refer to me as a dog earlier on.
10:25That's entertainment.
10:26That scares the bloody handkerchief for a stop.
10:30All right, okay, okay, I apologize then, I apologize.
10:32I am sorry for comparing you to a dog.
10:34Good.
10:35At least some dogs you can train them to give you things, you know what I mean?
10:38There we go.
10:39Super.
10:40Smashing.
10:41Where would I be without Dreena Darrell?
10:42Probably happily married to a girl with at least a pair of tits on her or something, you know.
10:46Try it with the handkerchief.
10:47Goes into the fit.
10:48It's not really pathetic.
10:49You know this excuse for a man?
10:50Has the cheek to call himself a magician the closest you've ever come to pulling a rabbit out of a hat was pulling a hair out of your ass?
10:59Well, at least I try and do the tricks. I don't turn them every night.
11:04So I'm a prostitute now, is that what you say?
11:06Well, er, well, yes.
11:08Well, at least I don't come from a family of freaks.
11:10Oh, I'm a freak, am I?
11:11Mm-hmm.
11:12I'm a freak?
11:13Mm-hmm.
11:14How do you work that out?
11:15Ah, well, what else would you call someone who managed to give birth to their own pimp?
11:17I've actually seen that.
11:18Ha, ha, ha, ha.
11:19Super smashing.
11:20Bit off!
11:22Just go into the audience and get somebody out for the Roy Walton section of the programme.
11:25Leave, you know.
11:26Thank you very much indeed.
11:27Okay, the incredible vanishing small red handkerchief, ladies and gentlemen.
11:30And sometimes when I'm making the handkerchief disappear, I like to pretend that it's Dreena.
11:36Thank you very much indeed, ladies and gentlemen.
11:38Thank you very much.
11:45Sorry about that.
11:46I had to just go out there for a moment.
11:47Sorry.
11:48Okay, the classic ordinary brown envelope trick.
11:53Like somebody in the audience?
11:54Anybody at all?
11:55You!
11:56What do you think of your favourite word in the English language?
11:58Okay.
11:59Done.
12:00Think of it.
12:01Is the word you're thinking of banana?
12:04No.
12:05No.
12:06Thank you very much indeed.
12:07And now, why not join us for the Roy Walton moment.
12:20Roy Walton, ladies and gentlemen.
12:21The greatest magical genius of this century with regard to card magic.
12:24And do you now give us a point, please?
12:26Yeah, I've got it.
12:27This is Steve or Clive or something.
12:28I can't even get the name right.
12:30Excellent stuff, eh?
12:31Tick, top.
12:32BBC Entertainment.
12:33We don't even know your name.
12:34Hey, Gerry, Gerry, can I do my match trick now?
12:36No, you get to sit down and shut up.
12:38Now, this is a trick which I'm going to do from one of these books written by Roy Walton.
12:42So, would you like to just point to any book, please?
12:44Okay, open it up.
12:45Open it up.
12:46And just point to any trick in the book.
12:48Because these books contain Roy Walton's tricks, okay?
12:50So, point to any trick.
12:51Sometime tonight.
12:52Same again, please.
12:54Right?
12:55This is sometimes known in the trade as oil and creams.
12:57It's an excellent trick, this.
12:58And it involves colours of cards, okay?
13:01So, you've got to watch very carefully because it's an observation test
13:03and therefore I shall be asking you questions later, okay?
13:06So, what we have here is a red card, a black card, red card, black card, red card,
13:09red card, red card, and a black card.
13:11See, Clive?
13:12Alternating.
13:13Get it?
13:14Alternating.
13:15I think I can supply my own pattern, you know?
13:16Okay.
13:17Now, what I'm going to do here is I'm going to do all the cards out.
13:18Red, black, red, black.
13:19Leaving me naturally enough with two red cards and two black cards, okay?
13:23Now, the observation test comes at this point.
13:26How many red cards do you think I'm holding in this hand?
13:29Two.
13:30Two?
13:31Absolutely, Caron.
13:32They are, in fact, all red cards.
13:34So, what colours do you think are over here?
13:36Black and red.
13:37Black and red.
13:38Absolutely right.
13:39But did you know they are, in fact, four kings?
13:40Thank you very much indeed.
13:42Yes!
13:43Thank you!
13:44Four kings right.
13:45Four kings right.
13:46Four kings right.
13:47Four kings right.
13:48Four kings right.
13:49Four kings.
13:50Why don't you four kings shut up?
13:51Okay, move right along.
13:52The two black kings will assist me in another Roy Walton trick, okay?
13:55Two black kings go into the pack like so.
13:57And, Clive, what I'm going to do is I'm going to think of any card in the pack.
14:01Alright?
14:02But not one of the two black kings because we're using them.
14:04Alright?
14:05What's going to happen here is we're going to snap the pack and instantly the card you're
14:08thinking of will appear in between the two black kings as if by tragic.
14:12Alright?
14:13Alright.
14:14So, ready for this?
14:15What was the card you were thinking of?
14:16I'm surprised.
14:17Ace of spades and incredibly in between the black kings.
14:22We now find the ace of spades.
14:25I don't know exactly where it is but it is there somewhere I can assure you.
14:29This is not much of a trick so what I'll do is I'll give the pack another snap like
14:32so and spit them out and this time we find that there is indeed only one card in between
14:36the black kings and one card only.
14:38Would you turn that card over please?
14:40Turn it over and we buy the ace of spades.
14:42I thank you.
14:45Now it's fine.
14:46Move that along.
14:47Move, move, move, move, move.
14:48My turn now.
14:49I'm doing a match trick, Clive.
14:50What I can do from this box of matches I'll take five matches.
14:54That's a good part.
14:55Five matches and I'm going to move those matches twice to form a perfect likeness of Jerry Sadowitz.
15:02Now, do you think I can do it?
15:03Yeah.
15:04Do you think I can?
15:05Do, do, do, do.
15:07Do, do, do.
15:09Do, do, do.
15:10That's very clever.
15:11Hey, shut up!
15:14Did anyone here tell you to applaud that?
15:15No?
15:16I see.
15:17Jerry Sadowitz is a tit.
15:18That's really clever, you silly cow.
15:19You've completely ruined the moment.
15:20That's it.
15:21End of story.
15:22Well, I'll see you again this time, next week, ladies and gentlemen.
15:24Don't tell him, don't tell him.
15:25Do it, do it, do it.
15:26Go on, please, Jerry.
15:27Tell me I'm brilliant.
15:28You are brilliant.
15:29You're really brilliant, Colin.
15:30I love you.
15:31All right, get up.
15:32Okay, I will venture to do another card trick.
15:34I hope that this one works as well.
15:36What I'm going to try and do here, Clive, is to produce four aces from this borrowed,
15:40shuffled pack of cards, okay?
15:41This is extremely difficult.
15:43Here we go, cutting the pack, and we find the ace of clubs.
15:47Second ace is considerably harder.
15:50There it is, the ace of farts.
15:53This actually gets harder because there's only two aces left in the pack, you see.
15:57And so, obviously, there's less chance of actually finding it.
16:00But no problem to the likes of me.
16:01I simply slap the pack and the next ace jumps up to the top and also changes miraculously
16:08into the ten of clubs at the same time.
16:10So what I'll do is I'll just give it a little snap and just remove the disguise.
16:12As you can see, it turns into the ace of spades.
16:18Thanks.
16:19And last but not least, I'm afraid I haven't got any crummy pattern for us, but I'll take
16:22this card, the three of diamonds.
16:23Give it a little snap, whereupon it changes instantly into the ace of diamonds, giving
16:26us four aces.
16:27Thank you very much.
16:35So, Steve, what do you think of that?
16:36I mean, Clive...
16:39What happened to Clive?
16:40Uh, he went.
16:42What do you mean he went?
16:43He got bored and he went.
16:44Well, just bitched off?
16:45Yeah.
16:46Hey, get back here, you bastard.
16:47That took me 11 years to long.
16:50Jerry.
16:51So where's he going then?
16:52It's been wasted years, by the way.
16:53Do you know how much it takes me to practice this?
16:55You know, this is a lot better than pulling rabbits out of a hat or doves out of boxes
16:59or chickens out of the arse, you know?
17:03So where's he gone?
17:04He's gone to see the what?
17:05He's gone to see the fabulous falling over with us.
17:06Oh, the fabulous falling over with us, wouldn't you say?
17:08The fabulous falling over with us.
17:10Ladies and gentlemen, the fabulous falling over with us.
17:19Great.
17:20And now, a Paul Barrows Review report of the Magic Circle.
17:23Hello.
17:24I'm standing outside the famous Magic Circle here in Woodland.
17:27You would never guess from this anonymous-looking building that this is the place where thousands
17:34of magicians gather every week.
17:36To become a member of the Magic Circle, you have to be a great magician.
17:40And to be a great magician, you've got to be very cunning, very devious, totally insane, and above all, you've got to be a very good liar.
17:49So why the Magic Circle won't let women join is beyond me.
17:55Some very interesting photographs here at the Magic Circle.
17:57There's Tommy Cooper.
17:59Everybody loved Tommy Cooper, didn't they?
18:01But how many people showed up for his funeral?
18:03Invisible Man.
18:04He's good.
18:05This guy is the guy that I absolutely hate, right?
18:09This is David Copperfield, right?
18:11Sorry, Dave.
18:12This is the guy that comes on television and goes,
18:15Tonight we're going to make a jumbo jet disappear without the aid of any camera tricks.
18:19Like, how the hell else is it done, you know?
18:21What's he doing?
18:22Is he back-palming the aeroplane, you know?
18:24He's sticking the aeroplane up his sleeve and we're not looking, you know?
18:28I think his best trick, actually, is when he stands on stage for about half an hour,
18:31and then when the lights go on, the entire audience has completely disappeared.
18:36Oh, look.
18:37Here's a picture of me.
18:45Ah, now, this is John Ramsey.
18:47Now, this guy was an absolute master of misdirection.
18:50For example, he could put a coin in one hand,
18:52and while you're looking at the coin, he'd, like, rabbit punch you in the stomach.
18:55It's absolutely amazing.
18:57Magic Circle also houses some very rare props, for example,
19:00and here is the actual pack of playing cards used by Cardini.
19:05And if you don't believe me...
19:09See, still works.
19:11This is, uh, Cardini himself,
19:13their merde de preste digitation.
19:16And, uh, well, I don't like to brag or anything,
19:19but, um, I actually consider myself to be the exponent of Cardini's work,
19:24and, uh, tonight I thought a little tribute to the great man might be in order.
19:28So, uh, join me for Sadowitz on Cardini.
19:31Who cares how cold and brave the day may be?
19:49Wait until dark, and we'll be warm.
20:01Our place of love is where we face...
20:08The moon lives together.
20:17And, at the base you stay full...
20:23And I can feel your mission..
20:34in the night
20:36My disappointment
20:42is
20:43that
20:45a
20:47cheeriest day
20:51may bring us
20:54little dreams
20:55that seems
20:58to be still
20:59are
21:01but oh
21:03my darling
21:05wait
21:06until
21:09darling
21:10and
21:21oh
21:26This day may bring us little dreams
21:44That seem to miss them all
21:49But oh, my darling, wait
21:56Well, I'm sure you'll agree, some fantastic magic
22:03If you're drinking McCarty
22:05Okay, just time for one last incredibly sick joke
22:08This guy goes to a brothel, right?
22:09And he says, what can I get for a fiver?
22:11Say, what can I get for a fiver?
22:12Jerry?
22:13Yes?
22:13This is Bill and Irene from Luzon
22:16Yeah?
22:17They're good, aren't they?
22:19Yeah?
22:23Oh, it kind of makes you appreciate that being McGee, really
22:25So anyway, he goes in, he's looking at a fiver, right?
22:27So she says, go up the steps
22:29There's a door on the left
22:29There's a girl in there
22:30Who'll do the business for you, right?
22:31So he goes in
22:32And it's the most painful shag
22:33He's ever had in his life, right?
22:35I mean, what?
22:35You're going to do the pensioner trip?
22:37Oh, the pensioner trip?
22:37Yeah
22:37Have you got a pensioner?
22:38Yeah, yeah, yeah
22:38Oh, this is brilliant, by the way
22:39I actually have got this incredible ability
22:42Of being able to cure all these pensioners
22:44Of any kind of ailment
22:45It's a power handed to me by David Icke himself
22:48Wolf, roll the germs, please
22:51So anyway, he goes in
22:59And it's the most painful
23:00I know it didn't work
23:02It never works
23:03You've got to keep practising, haven't you?
23:05So anyway, a week later he comes back, right?
23:07But this time he says
23:08What can I get for 50 quid?
23:09Right, what can I get for 50 quid?
23:10So she says, go up the steps
23:12There's a door on the left
23:12There's a girl in there
23:13I'll do the business for you
23:14You can do the Houdini trick
23:15Oh, the Houdini trick?
23:16Yeah
23:16The Houdini trick?
23:17Yeah
23:17No
23:17I'm going to joke
23:18What can I get for 50 quid?
23:20Right
23:20So she says, I've got the steps
23:22You might as well
23:22I mean, we've got the whole studio
23:23Might as well make use of it
23:25Why don't we do the Houdini
23:26Houdini escapes from a big box, doesn't he?
23:28Where are we going to get a big box from?
23:34What about the handcuffs?
23:35Ta-dee
23:36These are the genuine Houdini handcuffs, are they?
23:38Yes, they are
23:39No, they're not
23:40These are the ones, ladies and gentlemen
23:41That we use every night
23:42When...
23:42The guy goes back to the brothel
23:45I've said all that, right?
23:46It's the same woman
23:47And this time it's the most pleasurable experience
23:49We also have the genuine Houdini straitjacket, ladies and gentlemen
23:52Well, that looked good
23:56Must have cost a fiver for a set of lister
23:58Well done, that girl
24:00Yeah, it was, isn't it?
24:01And also, by the way, you know, Jerry
24:02They have finally let women join the magic circle
24:04Really?
24:05So how does that help you?
24:07It's the most pleasurable experience he's ever had
24:09Listen, you little prick
24:10It's bad enough you come over like a poor man who's very married
24:12But you dress like an overage student
24:14And your dolly little joke
24:15Had a thinly disguised misogyny
24:16Probably a result of severe mental deficiency
24:19Don't sit on the fence, Trina
24:21What do you really think?
24:23You know, one of the absolute worst things
24:25You have a show business
24:26Is meeting hypocritical Scottish comedians
24:28And bowlerats
24:29You know the type
24:30Oh, you don't understand comedy, Alexei
24:32When I say that all women are bastards
24:34They're really being ironic
24:35I really mean men
24:36Look, Trina
24:38When I say that all women are devious
24:40Cunning, boring, vain, scheming
24:42Bastards
24:43I'm really being ironic
24:44I'm really referring to men
24:45See, if Alexei Sayle was on this programme
24:47He'd understand
24:48You know, Jerry
24:49You know what I think?
24:50What do you think?
24:51I think the reason you make all these jokes about women
24:53Is because you've got a tiny little knob
24:55You can't get it up
24:56And you can't get a girlfriend
24:57Right!
24:59That's exactly why I do it
25:00Now let's get on with a bloody joke
25:02So, it's the most pleasurable experience I've ever had in his life
25:04Fifty quid
25:05Jerry, the Houdini trick
25:06Can we do the Houdini trick?
25:08No, we cannot do the Houdini trick
25:09Because Houdini's got to escape from that box
25:11And Houdini is dead
25:12There's no way he can escape from that box
25:14Jerry, Jerry
25:14He's not alive anymore
25:16So, it's doing the joke
25:18Alright
25:19What is this?
25:23This is Houdini
25:24This is Houdini's ashes, isn't it?
25:28Actually, um
25:28Careful, careful
25:29Don't have escaped this joke
25:30You're a sick man, Brina
25:33Ladies and gentlemen
25:35So, the Houdini is now locked in the box
25:36In a stroke jacket and handcuffs
25:38He has two seconds to escape
25:39Can we have a drumroll, please?
25:41Goodbye
25:41Cut
25:51Get the axe
25:52I told you this wasn't going to work
25:53We had a brilliant joke
25:54We had a fantastic joke
25:55This stupid
25:56Shut up
25:57Two
25:58Don't be able to tell you
25:59He's used to it
26:00Unbelievable
26:03These terrible ladies and gentlemen
26:05Houdini in the sink
26:06And my box
26:07And a beard on the back
26:08And I'll see it now
26:09What a show business
26:10Invent
26:11Jerry, it's not Houdini's ashes
26:13Huh?
26:13They're my grandmother's
26:14Don't be serious
26:15Oh, John
26:15Houdini's ashes
26:16And a beard on the house
26:18Would you just have a taste?
26:20It's my grandmother's
26:21Hang on a second
26:23Hang on
26:24Dreena
26:24What?
26:26This is your granny
26:27Granny, you're saying hello
26:29Dreena
26:30Hello
26:31Dreena
26:31You're saying hello to granny
26:32Hello
26:33Granny, say goodbye
26:35Dreena
26:35Bye
26:36As for you
26:38Pick up and make me a balloon animal
26:41So
26:45Guy
26:46Prostitute
26:4750 quid
26:48Same woman
26:49Fantastic
26:50Pledgeable experience
26:51He says, I don't understand it
26:52What do you do for the extra 50 quid?
26:53She says, well for the extra money
26:55What I do for the extra money
26:56Is I f***ing all the
26:56F***ing all the
26:57F***ing all the
26:58F***ing all the
26:58F***ing all the
26:59F***ing all the
26:59Fantastic audience
27:00I hate all those individuals
27:01And what can I say
27:02Coming into the show
27:04I find it very difficult
27:04Winding up a set properly
27:05So what I'll do
27:06Is I'll phone you
27:07Tuesday
27:08Old age pensions
27:13Don't you just hate them?
27:23See it
27:32Bye
27:33And
27:33And

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