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Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00If you're tired of lemonade
00:00:19Come on, Mary Lou, move your eggs!
00:00:21Bought by milkmaid, spillin' any cup
00:00:24You'll get it up when you see six-pack Annie
00:00:28Step right up and join the crowd
00:00:33You'll lose your pride when nannies start shakin'
00:00:38Don't be surprised if it's hot enough to fry your bacon
00:00:41She rides through town on a fuckin' horse
00:00:46They don't all fit in the saddle, of course
00:00:49When she does her stuff with smiles and beers
00:00:52Well, guess this bunny or is everybody?
00:00:55Now bang, bang, the good times bang
00:00:58When daddy comes bangin' round
00:01:00Bang, bang, bang
00:01:02Good morning, six-pack
00:01:03Who in the hell taught you how to drive, Fustace?
00:01:06The same woman taught me to screw
00:01:07Well, they killed us both
00:01:09That's what she said
00:01:11Get out of my way
00:01:12I race you to the diner
00:01:13Dollar says I beat the pants off in you
00:01:15Oh, who says we're wearin' any pants?
00:01:18You're tired of crashin' boards
00:01:20Holdin' doors
00:01:24So pay em' no full price
00:01:26Take my advice
00:01:27Go be six-pack Annie
00:01:29Toss your hat
00:01:33Spin your spur
00:01:34You might be the one when Annie starts flirtin'
00:01:39She'll grab your hat
00:01:41But you love the way it's hurtin'
00:01:43She rides through town on a fuckin' horse
00:01:48They don't all fit in the saddle, of course
00:01:51When she does her stuff with smiles and beers
00:01:54Her kisses burn your ears
00:01:56Everybody now bang, bang
00:01:58Good times bang
00:01:59When Annie comes bangin' round
00:02:01I'm in her pants
00:02:03I got her now
00:02:04Hope that gang would love the bang
00:02:06Annie's down
00:02:07Woo-hoo-hoo!
00:02:09Marlowe, we're not gonna let that damn
00:02:11Fustace beat us
00:02:12We're gonna take a shortcut
00:02:14Woo-hoo-hoo!
00:02:15All right!
00:02:31Where did all these fucking cows come from?
00:02:58Eddie, no, stop!
00:03:17Fuck!
00:03:18What's wrong with your truck?
00:03:38You dare say?
00:03:39Hey!
00:03:40Hey!
00:03:41Hey!
00:03:42Hey!
00:03:43Hey!
00:03:44Hey!
00:03:45Hey!
00:03:46Hey!
00:03:47Hey!
00:03:49Hey!
00:03:50Hey!
00:03:51Hey!
00:03:52Hey!
00:03:53Hey!
00:03:54Hey!
00:03:55Hey!
00:03:56Hey!
00:03:57Hey!
00:03:58I'll tell ya what, instead of the dollar
00:04:00Why don't I take you to the hayloft tonight
00:04:01and buy you a couple of beers?
00:04:02Thanks, but I'll take the dollar
00:04:04Hey!
00:04:05Hey!
00:04:06Hey!
00:04:07Hank, I bought my girlfriend a new car yesterday, Chevrolet, about twice a week.
00:04:15Morning, six-patch. I've been waiting on you.
00:04:21Oh, you're gonna lose me my job.
00:04:25Shit, we'll keep up a joke.
00:04:27No, it ain't shit, I shovel. It's manure.
00:04:31Morning, Annie. Morning, Annie.
00:04:33You're late. You're late.
00:04:35Oh, you boys ready to order.
00:04:37I'm sorry, we're late at this. How you feeling this morning?
00:04:40I'm vagos acting up again. Arthritis is still hitting my joints and I'm coming down with a touch of the colic.
00:04:47Other than that, I'm fit as a fiddle.
00:04:57Here's your eggs, Bobby, too.
00:04:59What was there with Bustas?
00:05:01None of your business.
00:05:03It is to my business, because I love you.
00:05:06Bobby Joe loves a four-letter word, and when a boy starts talking about love, a girl's about to get laid.
00:05:12Yeah.
00:05:14You eat your eggs.
00:05:16Yes, ma'am.
00:05:18Mary Lou, this is getting pretty full. Would you mind taking it outside?
00:05:22Yes, ma'am.
00:05:23Well, it looks like it's gonna be a hot one today.
00:05:31How about a skinny tip?
00:05:32Is that all you ever think about Bobby Joe is sex?
00:05:36Mm-hmm.
00:05:37That in the heat.
00:05:38Well, all right.
00:05:39You bring the blanket.
00:05:40Don't forget to bring a six-pack.
00:05:41Annie Bodine!
00:05:42I've had a new egg!
00:05:44Morning, Sheriff.
00:05:45Morning, Sheriff.
00:05:46Morning, Sheriff.
00:05:47How about a hot one today?
00:05:48How about a skinny tip?
00:05:49Is that all you ever think about Bobby Joe is sex?
00:05:52Mm-hmm.
00:05:53That in the heat.
00:05:54Well, all right.
00:05:57All right.
00:05:58You bring the blanket.
00:05:59And don't forget to bring a six-pack.
00:06:06Annie Bodine!
00:06:07I've had a new egg!
00:06:10Morning, Sheriff.
00:06:20Lordy, lordy.
00:06:23Boy, it's hot.
00:06:25I don't think hell could be hotter than this.
00:06:30You look like you swallowed a worm in, Tess.
00:06:33It's a letter from Mr. Pike at the bank, darling.
00:06:37If we don't make those payments, we're gonna lose the diner.
00:06:41Those sons of bitches.
00:06:43And don't you swear, honey.
00:06:45It ain't ladylike.
00:06:47Well, I know you're working yourself to the bone.
00:06:50People just ain't eating out anymore.
00:06:52I suppose so.
00:06:53But Mr. Pike has got his own problems.
00:06:57What with times being what they are.
00:07:00I wish we had that damn Pike's problems.
00:07:03Everybody in the county owes him money.
00:07:05I know.
00:07:07Maybe we can borrow the money from Florida till things get better.
00:07:10No.
00:07:11Don't you go bothering your sister with our problems.
00:07:15Why not?
00:07:16She struck a rich in Miami.
00:07:18Yeah.
00:07:19Well, we only heard from her once in three years, Annie.
00:07:23You know how these city folk are.
00:07:25She's probably living high on the hog.
00:07:28She probably don't have one red cent to spare.
00:07:30You know what we need, Aunt Tess?
00:07:32Yeah.
00:07:34We need the money to meet the payments and fix up the diner.
00:07:38Nope.
00:07:39A sugar daddy.
00:07:41That's what we need.
00:07:42Someone to take care of us.
00:07:44Set us up in style.
00:07:45Buy us some new clothes.
00:07:47And a new car.
00:07:48Maybe two new cars.
00:07:51You got somebody in mind.
00:07:55That Bobby Joe Jamison.
00:07:58He don't have enough money in his raggedy jeans to pay for a stamp on a postcard.
00:08:05Well, there's gotta be someone, Aunt Tess.
00:08:08All we gotta do is find him.
00:08:09Come on.
00:08:12Whoa!
00:08:17What are you?
00:08:31Go for the tree lamp.
00:08:32Okay.
00:08:39Whoo!
00:09:03Well, well, might have won't not, ain't it?
00:09:07Oh, shit!
00:09:09Come on out of there.
00:09:12All right, come on.
00:09:13Just unscrew yourselves.
00:09:14Get on out of there.
00:09:15Who is it?
00:09:16You know who it is, Bobby George.
00:09:17Your friendly sheriff.
00:09:18And you're both under arrest.
00:09:20For what?
00:09:22I don't want no sass.
00:09:23Now, just get on your out of there.
00:09:25Oh, good kid.
00:09:26I'm very far without risking getting her tits blown off.
00:09:29Eddie, this is the last time now.
00:09:31Get on out of there.
00:09:32No.
00:09:34Oh, shit, sheriff.
00:09:36You know I can't come out like this.
00:09:38What's the matter, boy?
00:09:40Catfish got your touchy roll?
00:09:42Touchy roll?
00:09:44Oh, you know why I can't come out now.
00:09:47Come on out of there, boy.
00:09:48It's the last time I'm telling you.
00:09:50All right.
00:09:51I'm coming.
00:09:52I'm coming.
00:09:54I'm coming out backwards.
00:09:55Now.
00:09:59Move it, boy.
00:10:00I'm coming.
00:10:04Come on now, get yourself over there in that squad car.
00:10:06Yeah.
00:10:07And get in the back there and don't let me hear a word out of you.
00:10:09And don't fool my radio.
00:10:11Annie!
00:10:13Annie!
00:10:16Annie Bodine!
00:10:17Now you've just run me off my limits.
00:10:19Where are you?
00:10:20Annie!
00:10:22Annie Bodine!
00:10:23Come on out of there!
00:10:25You are the most aggravated.
00:10:27Shut up!
00:10:29Thank you, Mary.
00:10:30Thank you, sir.
00:10:31I don't want to number one.
00:10:32I want to number two.
00:10:34Damn!
00:10:35You looking for me, chef?
00:10:36I dare the fuck!
00:10:38It's all right.
00:10:39I'm so happy.
00:10:40You look for me, chef?
00:10:42No.
00:10:44No, no.
00:10:45No.
00:10:47It's all right.
00:10:49A while.
00:10:51I'm so happy.
00:10:53Here's the fire.
00:10:54No, no.
00:10:55It's all right.
00:11:00It's all right.
00:11:01You looking for me, Sheriff Waters?
00:11:06Annie Bodine, you are the most aggravating.
00:11:09Breaking the law, obstructing justice,
00:11:11impeding the law officer doing his duty.
00:11:13You fooling with my radio.
00:11:16And look what you did to my boots.
00:11:19This ain't no laughing matter.
00:11:20We're going up to my jail now.
00:11:31All right, Bobby Joe, Annie, come on, in you go.
00:11:37Bobby Joe, you know where the cell is,
00:11:38and I want to hear that door clank good.
00:11:40Sit yourself down right there, young man.
00:11:52Now, Tess, Marlon Waters here.
00:11:55Come on over to the jail and get your property.
00:11:59No, she's all right.
00:12:00Just in a little trouble again.
00:12:03Sheriff, can I have a Dr. Pepper?
00:12:08You got wax in your ears, boy?
00:12:10I told you to get in that cell,
00:12:11and I don't want to hear another word out of you.
00:12:15Good night, Annie.
00:12:17Good night, Bobby Joe.
00:12:21Well, Annie,
00:12:22here you are in trouble with the law again.
00:12:27You know, if you don't straighten out,
00:12:29you're going to flat turn out to be a genuine juvenile delinquent.
00:12:33You know something, Sheriff?
00:12:35What, Annie?
00:12:38What, Annie?
00:12:39Between you and me, Marlon,
00:12:41you are purely disgusting.
00:12:45Well, now,
00:12:45ain't that fine talk coming from you?
00:12:47Look at you sitting there half naked
00:12:49and had your butt slung clean over the county line.
00:12:52Yeah, well,
00:12:53this is going to be the high point of your career,
00:12:55catching Bonnie and Clyde skinny dipping.
00:12:57They're going to sing songs about you.
00:13:01Oh, Annie,
00:13:02I've been meaning to talk to you for some time.
00:13:05You know,
00:13:06there's two roads in life folks can follow.
00:13:08What are they?
00:13:10Well,
00:13:10there's the high road
00:13:11and the low road.
00:13:13Now,
00:13:13the high road,
00:13:14that's the good road.
00:13:15And the low road,
00:13:16that's the bad road.
00:13:18And you've got to be settling down,
00:13:20making up your mind
00:13:21which one you're going to follow,
00:13:22because you're flat at the crossroads.
00:13:25What are you driving at, Sheriff?
00:13:27Well,
00:13:27what I'm trying to say, Annie,
00:13:29it's hard for you to be settling down.
00:13:31And you need a strong man
00:13:32to help you down that road.
00:13:33Yes, Sheriff.
00:13:35Bobby Joe ain't that man.
00:13:38He ain't?
00:13:38Well,
00:13:38who is?
00:13:40I am.
00:13:43Oh,
00:13:43now,
00:13:43wait a minute.
00:13:45You mean you and me?
00:13:48The two of us?
00:13:49Uh-huh.
00:13:51Oh,
00:13:52I get it.
00:13:53You followed Bobby Joe and me tonight,
00:13:55didn't you?
00:13:56And out of the goodness
00:13:57of your little old heart,
00:13:58you hauled us in
00:13:59to keep up law and order.
00:14:00That's right,
00:14:00isn't it?
00:14:01Well,
00:14:01you're about as charming
00:14:02as an old water moccasin.
00:14:04Oh,
00:14:05Annie.
00:14:07Oh,
00:14:07Tess,
00:14:08here she is,
00:14:09I'm sorry to say.
00:14:10Oh,
00:14:11Annie,
00:14:12get in the car.
00:14:13Yes,
00:14:14Aunt Tess.
00:14:16Thank you,
00:14:16Sheriff Waters.
00:14:18It's all right,
00:14:18Tess.
00:14:19Oh,
00:14:19can I talk to you
00:14:20for a minute,
00:14:20Tess?
00:14:22Now,
00:14:22I know Annie's a good girl,
00:14:24and,
00:14:24well,
00:14:24I hope you understand,
00:14:26but,
00:14:26see,
00:14:26I got to uphold the law
00:14:28no matter who's breakin' it.
00:14:29I understand.
00:14:31I knew you would,
00:14:32and that's why I think,
00:14:34well,
00:14:34if somebody put Annie
00:14:35on the right track,
00:14:36put his foot down,
00:14:38keep her out of trouble,
00:14:39well,
00:14:39she'd be a fine,
00:14:40upstanding citizen.
00:14:42I got my hands full
00:14:43with the diner,
00:14:44Sheriff,
00:14:44don't have time
00:14:45to watch Annie
00:14:46every minute.
00:14:47Well,
00:14:47that's my point.
00:14:48Oh,
00:14:48you see,
00:14:49Tess,
00:14:49she needs a man
00:14:50to look after her.
00:14:52Now,
00:14:52them snot-nosed boy
00:14:53like that Bobby Joe.
00:14:56I heard about the trouble
00:14:57you was havin'
00:14:58over at the bank.
00:15:00Well,
00:15:00Tess,
00:15:01I carry a little weight
00:15:02in this town,
00:15:02and I might even be able
00:15:05to get pocket ease up
00:15:06on you.
00:15:06That way,
00:15:07it'll give you more time
00:15:08to get Annie
00:15:09on the right road.
00:15:11All I ask is you,
00:15:12you tell her to spend
00:15:13a little more time
00:15:13with me.
00:15:15Maybe I could help
00:15:16straighten her out.
00:15:17Now,
00:15:18you think on it,
00:15:18Tess,
00:15:19because,
00:15:20well,
00:15:21Lord knows,
00:15:22I know how worrisome
00:15:24it is
00:15:24to try to make ends meet.
00:15:27Thank you very much,
00:15:29Marlon.
00:15:30I'll think it over.
00:15:32Good night.
00:15:34Night,
00:15:34Tess.
00:15:43Enjoy your meal.
00:15:58Anything to drink?
00:15:59Glass of buttermilk,
00:16:00if you please.
00:16:01Say,
00:16:01that's a mighty fine-looking
00:16:02brooch, lady.
00:16:03Ever think of sellin' it?
00:16:04Oh,
00:16:05that was my grandma's,
00:16:07mister.
00:16:07Don't reckon I'd like
00:16:08to part with it.
00:16:09I'll give you a good price.
00:16:11Bates is the name,
00:16:12tradin's my game.
00:16:13I'll buy, sell,
00:16:14and trade anything,
00:16:14anywhere,
00:16:15anytime.
00:16:16My, my.
00:16:17I bet you'll move about.
00:16:19Lots of places,
00:16:20lots of faces.
00:16:21Like to take a look
00:16:21at what I got?
00:16:23I'll get you that
00:16:24glass of buttermilk.
00:16:25Ah,
00:16:25the secret of longevity,
00:16:27buttermilk.
00:16:27Yes, sir.
00:16:28Never drink less than
00:16:28a quarter day myself.
00:16:29Good for the heart,
00:16:30good for the mind,
00:16:31and good for the soul.
00:16:32My Uncle Tector
00:16:33lived to be 93
00:16:35on a quarter moonshine
00:16:36a day.
00:16:37Why,
00:16:37he must have taken
00:16:38the formula with it.
00:16:39What formula?
00:16:41Glad you asked
00:16:41and pleased to show.
00:16:43Bates' patented
00:16:44time-of-life formula.
00:16:46Guaranteed to cure
00:16:46the gout,
00:16:47dissolve corns,
00:16:47and bring life
00:16:48back to those weary bones.
00:16:50Mr. Bates,
00:16:50that ain't the half of it.
00:16:52I got the pain
00:16:53of rheumatism,
00:16:54the headiness
00:16:54of the vapors,
00:16:55the swelling
00:16:56of the onions,
00:16:57the colic cough,
00:16:58and the touch
00:16:58of the asthma.
00:17:01And on top
00:17:01of all that,
00:17:02the old ticker.
00:17:04She ain't what
00:17:04she used to be.
00:17:05Lordy,
00:17:07I reckon I'll be lucky
00:17:09if I live out
00:17:09the rest of the year.
00:17:11My, oh, my,
00:17:12you certainly are
00:17:13a measure of misery.
00:17:15You could say that again.
00:17:17Look, lady,
00:17:18I gotta be honest with you.
00:17:19There's only one way
00:17:20to beat a rug.
00:17:21This is your time of life
00:17:22for a time of life.
00:17:23Oh, thank you kindly.
00:17:28Hello?
00:17:29Aunt Tess?
00:17:31Oh, it's Mr. Parker
00:17:32at the bank.
00:17:34Oh, excuse me,
00:17:35Mr. Bates.
00:17:40Hello?
00:17:42How do, Mrs. Barnes?
00:17:44I reckon you have
00:17:45a few minutes to see me?
00:17:47Oh, yes, Mr. Parker.
00:17:49I reckon I can
00:17:51come over right now.
00:17:52Uh, the morning rush
00:17:54is about over.
00:17:55Fine, I'll be waiting
00:17:57for you in my office.
00:17:58Bye.
00:17:58Put that old boat
00:17:59to hunt.
00:18:00Oh, my, Annie.
00:18:01Mr. Parker's a good man.
00:18:04He's just trying
00:18:04to do his job.
00:18:06Well, he's doing a job
00:18:07on this town,
00:18:07I'll tell you.
00:18:08I'm going with you.
00:18:10All right, Annie,
00:18:11but you mind your mouth.
00:18:14You hold the fort, Mary Lou.
00:18:16We'll be back
00:18:16in a little while.
00:18:17Okay.
00:18:18Excuse me, Mr. Bates.
00:18:19I gotta go.
00:18:20Sorry.
00:18:21Oh, that's all right.
00:18:22No trouble at all.
00:18:23My time is your time, lady.
00:18:25See you real soon.
00:18:26Bye.
00:18:26Bye.
00:18:27I'll leave my card
00:18:27with the girl here.
00:18:28Oh, miss,
00:18:29may I have some ketchup, please?
00:18:30Sure.
00:18:31Sure.
00:18:31I'll leave my card.
00:18:37I'll leave my card.
00:18:40I'll leave my card.
00:18:41I'll leave my card.
00:18:41I'll leave my card.
00:18:42I'll leave my card.
00:18:42I'll leave my card.
00:18:43I'll leave my card.
00:18:44I'll leave my card.
00:18:45I'll leave my card.
00:18:45I'll leave my card.
00:18:46I'll leave my card.
00:18:46I'll leave my card.
00:18:47I'll leave my card.
00:18:48I'll leave my card.
00:18:48I'll leave my card.
00:18:49I'll leave my card.
00:18:50I'll leave my card.
00:18:50I'll leave my card.
00:18:51I'll leave my card.
00:18:51I'll leave my card.
00:18:52I'll leave my card.
00:18:52I'll leave my card.
00:18:53I'll leave my card.
00:18:54I'll leave my card.
00:18:54you know i ain't seen you much here in these parts mr bates well i'm new to the territory
00:19:17pardon me how's business well bad for some good for others depends on the line you're going to be
00:19:24there in the right place at the right time what you sell
00:19:27well i got some combs i got beautiful tortoiseshell pearlescent plastic comb no
00:19:38pens leaf proof fountain pens and a new line of ballpoint pens guaranteed to ride 150 feet
00:19:44underwater or at 30 000 feet up in the air no watches i got your gold filled your silver filled
00:19:52your platinum filled plain dial on your radiant dial i got the plastic strap the leather strap
00:19:56tool door plane and i got your expandable strap no bracelets no thank you touffees
00:20:08earrings necklaces costume jewelry modifying earrings that is a genuine handmade
00:20:14seashell earring with gold filled backing and an adjustable tension for the spring clam
00:20:18no no
00:20:20art over the heart blue boy venus de milo david the resurrection and the rapist say buying women
00:20:29right a beautiful high quality lithograph and that famous painting and only a dollar 95
00:20:35and i can get you to frame in gold or silver no thanks something a little saucy perhaps french art
00:20:41you've got a mighty fine collection there mister but uh i don't think so
00:20:49what else you got well how about this hold on there mr bates it's a new line of hardware
00:20:54hard or soft i ain't got but a thin dime mr bates maybe some other time oh you sure got a lot of stuff
00:21:06there well my father always told me you can't sell off an empty cart
00:21:13anybody here order a stud to go studs i got them mr bates why don't you just sit down and enjoy your lunch
00:21:18glad to oblige okay if you don't want that stud to go you can always eat it here
00:21:28well howdy mary lou you know john here john's a friend of mine from over in perville how do john
00:21:35well you sure got big muscles you want to feel mary lou
00:21:49john can slice pie all night long if you know what i mean mary lou all night long my goodness
00:21:58mary lou john here's looking for someone to take to the dance you know anyone that might want to go
00:22:04with him my over in perville john here's known as long john the all night wonder you know why
00:22:14no bustus why
00:22:18well whoever goes to the dance with him will get to find out why firsthand so as to speak
00:22:23my my what a coincidence i had other plans but uh they just got changed no kidding
00:22:35you hear that long john come saturday night mary lou is gonna be free certainly not free bustus
00:22:43but um definitely not expensive
00:22:46now that leaves one knot left to be tied mary lou what's that
00:22:56i figure in return for me fixing you up with long john here you can fix me up with annie
00:23:02bustus i don't think i can do that that's gonna be a hard one to pull off
00:23:07then the deal's off come on long john pull out
00:23:11no long john i mean let's go bustus is he always that willing
00:23:24all right i'll see if i can get annie to go to the dance
00:23:27well it ain't that we're not trying mr parker it just seems that business is off all over
00:23:33uh believe me mrs barnes i am profoundly sorry but we simply can't extend your commitments any
00:23:41further lordy lordy the truth of the matter is mrs barnes that well we should have foreclosed
00:23:49three months ago after all i haven't charged you interest for three months how much do you want mr piker
00:23:59well let's see
00:24:21five thousand six hundred and forty one dollars and 87 cents would wipe the sleigh clean
00:24:26oh lordy lordy five thousand six hundred and forty one dollars and 87 cents
00:24:37i'll get it
00:24:40now don't you worry none mr piker i'll get every cent of it you've only got seven days annie remember
00:24:50come on aunt tess oh uh mrs barnes if i can be of any further assistance to you
00:24:59oh well thank you mr piker
00:25:05my goodness annie what you going to say that for we were gonna get five thousand six hundred and forty
00:25:10one dollars and 87 cents he ain't gonna take away our living from us aunt tess it's ours now i'll get it
00:25:20i'll get it
00:25:25luke i've been married 19 years and i got 19 children but i'm not gonna have any more
00:25:30my wife bought a hearing aid a hearing aid i don't see the connection well you see for 19 years she was
00:25:37deaf and every night i'd say shall we go to sleep or what and she'd say what
00:25:43annie i gotta talk to you i gotta talk to you too this is a murder boy you ain't kidding we got a big
00:25:53problem i sure do this is our biggest problem ever this could really set us on our ass i sure hope so
00:25:58do you know how much this could mean to us i'd say about eight or nine inches
00:26:02merely who's the richest man in town what who's the richest man in town i don't know this town support
00:26:07ain't got a rich man oh you're right well who's the next richest oh rich person i know is flora flora
00:26:13yeah but she lives in miami and she ain't even a man well we'll go to miami we'll talk to flora i'm sure
00:26:19she'd give us the money her being rich and all wow that would solve all of our problems now we can
00:26:24even go to the day yeah that's all my problem too boy oh boy we are gonna have a high old time
00:26:38tonight long john i tell you i feel so good tonight is the night miss annie six-pack bodine is gonna meet
00:26:46her maker do you get it ace make her say why is love like a roll of toilet paper i don't know
00:26:55because once you tear off the first piece the rest comes easy that stinks now what's the difference
00:27:02between a sin and a shame what is the difference between a sin and shame it's a sin to put it in
00:27:07and a shame to take it out mary lou come over here honey fun mary lou uh what's the difference
00:27:18between a circus and a las vegas chorus line oh ace everybody knows that a circus is an array of
00:27:23cunning stunts
00:27:33now i got delivered my part of the deal mary lou where's annie
00:27:37oh if you'll excuse me a minute i gotta go to the little girl's room mary lou said she'd be here
00:27:43well why don't you go find her and i'll get us a picture of beer huh
00:27:46well there you are it's all over for him father jody's went to get some sex i gotta talk to you
00:27:52real quick how what well buces came into the diner today and he had a friend of his john from perville
00:27:56with him and but john didn't have a date for the dance tonight but by coincidence i didn't either
00:28:00so i said i'd be john's date if only you've been you little bucket of honey you'd be his date tonight
00:28:05oh thanks mary lee you late sweet thing you let go of me hey just what the hell are you doing with
00:28:12six-pack well she ain't your gal she sure as hell is she came with me she is staying with me and you
00:28:20better come with me come on now you're in about a foot of hog slop right now boy i'm in a foot you're
00:28:29in about three feet of hog slop oh well if i'm in three feet then you're up to your neck in hog slop
00:28:35you boys better not make waves now
00:28:42i saw him at the ball yelling peanuts here he was so good looking that to keep him near
00:28:53i kept buying peanuts till i had a ten foot stack and by the seventh inning i was selling them back
00:29:01i tell you every time i see them nuts my heart leaps to the sky
00:29:13and though without them red hot nuts i will surely die
00:29:21they gave me such a kiss right through a double plate
00:29:25they shacked up with me that i carried me next day
00:29:30one romantic thing we have which never disappears
00:29:34we've been eating peanuts for six long years
00:29:38i tell you every time i see them nuts my heart leaps to the sky
00:29:52i think you better find yourself on another table view system
00:29:58glad too bobby joe but i'm taking six pack with me
00:30:02is that a fact it surely is
00:30:17i'm so glad the peanut man may meet his wife
00:30:23god damn it
00:30:42god damn it knock it off
00:30:43god damn it
00:30:47Knock it off, will ya?
00:30:49What the hell are you doing?
00:30:51God damn it!
00:30:55Hit him with the knife! Kick him!
00:30:57Hit him! Hit him! Hit him!
00:30:59What is this?
00:31:03Time to kill!
00:31:17Get him!
00:31:19Get him!
00:31:32Get him!
00:31:33Get him!
00:31:35Get him!
00:31:47Oh!
00:31:57Is that you, Gardner?
00:31:59Get the hell off my hood!
00:32:07All right, everybody!
00:32:11Everybody.
00:32:17Hank, how's your wife?
00:32:25Compared to what?
00:32:39Oh, no. Here comes trouble.
00:32:41Morning, ladies.
00:32:45Annie, could I talk to your private for a minute?
00:32:47Morning, Sheriff. High as your head.
00:32:49You watch your tongue, young man.
00:32:51Yes, sir. What do you want, Sheriff Waters?
00:32:53Now, look, Annie.
00:32:55It's like I told your Aunt Tess over at the office the other night.
00:32:59See, I know about the problem you all been having with Mr. Piker over at the bank.
00:33:02What's that got to do with you?
00:33:04I can help.
00:33:06How?
00:33:08Lend you the money.
00:33:10Where did you get any money?
00:33:12Oh, now, Annie, you know I ain't ever married.
00:33:14And I'm a frugal man.
00:33:15I've been scrimping and saving for years.
00:33:17And I'd be mighty proud to give you the lend of the money.
00:33:20What do you want, Marlon?
00:33:24You, Annie.
00:33:26I want you so awful much I can taste it.
00:33:29Oh, God, Marlon.
00:33:31I can't help myself, Annie.
00:33:33I know you don't like me much, but I got all the money you need.
00:33:37You're shaming yourself, Marlon.
00:33:39No, I ain't.
00:33:41You meet me out on Mooners Road about four o'clock this afternoon,
00:33:43and we'll go into it further.
00:33:45And you have all the money?
00:33:47That's right.
00:33:48You better not be trying to trick...
00:33:50Annie, you know I'm as upright as a tombstone.
00:33:53Okay, Marlon.
00:33:55You got yourself a date.
00:33:56Shake it!
00:33:57Oh.
00:34:00Put that on your bill.
00:34:09What'd that old Marlon want?
00:34:10He looked about as happy as a pig and shit when he left.
00:34:12He says he's got the money.
00:34:14He wants me to meet him out on Mooners Road,
00:34:16and he'll give it to me.
00:34:17The money?
00:34:18That and other things.
00:34:25You're going to look to George.
00:34:26Seven, eight, nine.
00:34:27Afternoon, Annie.
00:34:28All right, sure is warm, ain't it?
00:34:42Good afternoon, Annie.
00:34:45It sure is warm, ain't it?
00:34:47Uh-huh.
00:34:48You got the money, Marlin?
00:34:49Got it right here.
00:34:50Lord, I can't get over how beautiful you all look.
00:34:53Well, thank you.
00:34:54Let me see the money, Marlin.
00:34:56Oh, Annie, let's just sit here on the tailgate and relax
00:34:59and talk about the future.
00:35:01Marlin, the money.
00:35:03Well, I got it right here in this cigar box.
00:35:05Well, come on.
00:35:06Open it up.
00:35:07Okay.
00:35:08Here's my bank book.
00:35:12I got $193 and changing it as cash money.
00:35:15Yeah, what else?
00:35:16Well, I got these redeemable mercantile savings stamps.
00:35:20They'll bring some cash.
00:35:21Savings stamps?
00:35:23Well, Annie, I got my life insurance policy.
00:35:25Look at there.
00:35:26I can cash in the annuity over $400.
00:35:28Ooh, hot damn, Marlin.
00:35:30Keep on going.
00:35:31What else you got?
00:35:32Oh, that's it.
00:35:34That's it?
00:35:35That's all you got, Marlin?
00:35:37Well, on me.
00:35:38But I got me a sure-fire plan that's gonna make us rich, Annie.
00:35:42Yeah, what is it?
00:35:44Parking tickets.
00:35:46Parking tickets?
00:35:47I'm gonna splash me parking tickets all over this whole damn county.
00:35:51I get 2% of everything I bring in.
00:35:54Marlin, you idiot.
00:35:56There ain't the 1,047 people in the whole damn county.
00:36:00I know it, Annie.
00:36:01And I ain't gonna miss one of them.
00:36:03Oh, Marlin, that's the stupidest plan I ever heard of in my whole life.
00:36:08It's dumb.
00:36:09No, it ain't, Annie.
00:36:10It won't work.
00:36:12Yes, it will.
00:36:13Annie, don't go.
00:36:15Wait, Annie.
00:36:16I know we can work it out.
00:36:17Annie, I know it'll work.
00:36:18Marlin.
00:36:19Goodbye, Marlin.
00:36:20Annie.
00:36:21Marlin, I...
00:36:22Annie.
00:36:23Don't, don't leave.
00:36:24I know we can work it out, Annie.
00:36:25Marlin, it won't.
00:36:26Annie.
00:36:27Annie!
00:36:28She ain't lost to work!
00:36:30Annie!
00:36:40Luke, that wife of mine's a liar.
00:36:42How do you know?
00:36:43Well, she didn't come home all last time.
00:36:45Asked her where she was.
00:36:46She said she spent the night with her sister, Shirley.
00:36:49So?
00:36:50I spent the night with her sister, Shirley.
00:36:53We'll get packed this afternoon and first thing in the morning we're leaving for Miami.
00:36:58Yeah.
00:37:03Hot damn Miami Beach, here we come.
00:37:06I figure it shouldn't take more than a day to get the money from Flora.
00:37:10And if we like it there, we could spend another day or two lying on the beach.
00:37:14Yeah.
00:37:15Don't you suppose Aunt Tess will be too mad at us leaving and not saying goodbye?
00:37:19No, I explained everything in a note.
00:37:22I told her as soon as we got the $5,641, we'd hightail it back to Ted Willow.
00:37:29Lordy, lordy.
00:37:39That must be that damn lock, John.
00:37:52There's some confidence. Pull over. Let's pick them up.
00:37:57Some company. Pull over. Let's pick them up.
00:38:11Well, hell, why not?
00:38:21Hey, you boys want a ride?
00:38:23Yes.
00:38:23My name's Mary Lou Carter, and this here's Annie Bodine.
00:38:27Nice to meet you. Where are you going?
00:38:30Miami, you?
00:38:31Same place.
00:38:34Y'all are yawning a lot. You tired?
00:38:36Been up all night. Waited two hours for a ride.
00:38:39Oh, Annie, if they don't get a rest, they ain't gonna be worth nothing.
00:38:44Y'all want some shut-eye?
00:38:46Why don't you jump in the back of the truck and you rest up now, you hear?
00:38:49Boy, Annie, they sure are cute.
00:38:53I'll take the one with the short shorts, and you take the one that looks like Warren Beatty.
00:38:58Looks ain't everything.
00:38:59I know, but the shorts do help, don't they?
00:39:01Oh.
00:39:02Besides, they need their strength for later, right?
00:39:05No.
00:39:06Hey, maybe we can get a little action out of those, too.
00:39:18Oh, come on, Annie, have some fun.
00:39:21Well, look in the back, see how they're doing.
00:39:23Oh, my God, Annie, look.
00:39:29They're kissing and hugging.
00:39:30What are we gonna do?
00:39:31Oh, shit.
00:39:34Everybody out.
00:39:37What's on fire?
00:39:38What the hell goes on around here?
00:39:40The truck's on fire and get out.
00:39:41Fire!
00:39:42Fire!
00:39:43God damn it!
00:39:57That proves that the whole world sucks!
00:40:01Don't you wish.
00:40:02Oh.
00:40:04I was never so surprised in all my life.
00:40:08Two handsome boys like that, kissing.
00:40:10What a waste.
00:40:13They must have had some Yankee blood in them.
00:40:15I can't imagine a couple of real Southern boys carrying on that way.
00:40:19That's the truth.
00:40:20Hey, Annie, pull over quick.
00:40:45What?
00:40:46Look over yonder.
00:40:47Now, I don't know about Miami, but the boys back home, they don't need a special place.
00:40:56They can have an erection anywhere.
00:40:58You're terrible.
00:41:00Oh, Mary Lou.
00:41:12Well, here we are.
00:41:14Miami.
00:41:15Miami.
00:41:15Oh, I can't believe what I'm so excited about.
00:41:19Look at all them palm trees.
00:41:21I'll be there.
00:41:22Look over here.
00:41:24Wow, look at that building.
00:41:30There's only one thing missing.
00:41:32A six-pack.
00:41:33Right.
00:41:34We'll just pop it here and grab ourselves a couple of beers, call Flora and tell her we're
00:41:39in town.
00:41:40You know, Senor Jack, one million dollars.
00:41:49That's all I need.
00:41:50That's all you need, huh?
00:41:51Well, that's what you said before the Bay of Pigs.
00:41:53And look how that turned down.
00:41:55Senor Jack, but that was a small tomato.
00:41:57You know, I got 10,000 men in Miami just waiting for a signal.
00:42:02You know, Castro will never know but hit him.
00:42:05I got everything already, Senor.
00:42:07The only thing I need is the boats, the guns, and the money, and the ammunition, and the
00:42:11gasoline.
00:42:12That's all?
00:42:12That's all.
00:42:13Well, it'll take a hell of a lot more than that to get that bearded hippie out of there,
00:42:18and you know it.
00:42:19You know, I could arrange for you to be the vice-presidente.
00:42:21Oh, get over here.
00:42:23Hey, how about another drake over here?
00:42:25For your tamales, Senor.
00:42:27I'm a little short-handed today.
00:42:29Well, how do, little lady?
00:42:32How do, cowboy?
00:42:34What do you got to do to get some service around this place?
00:42:36Oh, just out around.
00:42:39How about a six-pack over here?
00:42:41Yeah.
00:42:42Your friend's got a mighty fine pair of lungs.
00:42:46They get us around, okay?
00:42:48I bet they do.
00:42:49I want a six-pack.
00:42:52You go?
00:42:53No, we'll just drink it here, little feller.
00:42:55Mary Lou, I'm going to go call Flora.
00:42:57Okay.
00:43:00Hey, mister, what in tarnation are you drinking?
00:43:03What are you drinking there?
00:43:04Cornel, what the hell do you call this here thing?
00:43:07A coco loco.
00:43:07What the hell is that?
00:43:09A crazy coconut.
00:43:10You have a couple of those, and you just go right through the floor.
00:43:14Oh, my God.
00:43:16How many of you drunk?
00:43:17Five, heading for six.
00:43:19Oh, how do you feel?
00:43:21A little numb.
00:43:23Oh, Beth.
00:43:24Oh, five, three, two.
00:43:34Oh, five, three, two.
00:43:36How do?
00:43:37Flora there?
00:43:38This is Flora.
00:43:39Hi, Flora.
00:43:41This is Annie.
00:43:43Baby Annie, where are you?
00:43:45Me and Mary Lou's here in Miami.
00:43:48My God.
00:43:49Sis, I really got to talk to you.
00:43:52Uh, what are you doing?
00:43:54Uh, would you believe, uh, working?
00:43:57We got to see.
00:43:58When can we come over?
00:43:59Uh, well, um...
00:44:01Well, how about in a half hour?
00:44:03Uh...
00:44:04What's going on?
00:44:06My baby sister will be coming in 30 minutes.
00:44:08Well, I'll be coming in five if we ever get to it.
00:44:11Okay, Annie.
00:44:1330 minutes.
00:44:14That'll be...
00:44:15Woo!
00:44:17Wonderful.
00:44:18Okay.
00:44:18We're right over.
00:44:19Bye.
00:44:20Bye.
00:44:21Bye.
00:44:27How did Flora sound?
00:44:28She sounded real thrilled.
00:44:30Hey, what you little heifers doing over here?
00:44:32You all on vacation?
00:44:33No, we're working, girls.
00:44:35You need a job?
00:44:36I can use somebody with, uh, your talent.
00:44:39No, thanks, little feller.
00:44:41We got to work all cut out for us.
00:44:43We've come a-door knockin'.
00:44:44They certainly got them knockers for it.
00:44:47Knockers all drank to knockers.
00:44:49Crack another nut, Carmelo.
00:44:52Round them up.
00:44:56Real nice meetin' you fellers, but we gotta get on goin'.
00:44:59Y'all come back now, you hear?
00:45:02Si, come on, oh, well, well.
00:45:04What the hell's the matter to you, boy?
00:45:06Don't you learn how to speak the English language?
00:45:07Did you ever go to school?
00:45:09Oh, senor Jack, sure I went to school.
00:45:12I went to school three days.
00:45:14Three days?
00:45:14Si, senor.
00:45:15First day, I went to school.
00:45:17Second day, I did went to school.
00:45:20Third day, I went to school.
00:45:22And the teacher told me,
00:45:23Hey, Carmelo, what's the matter with you?
00:45:25You don't come to school yesterday.
00:45:27And I said, teacher, I'm very sorry,
00:45:29but I have to take the bull to the cow.
00:45:31And she said, can your father do that?
00:45:33And I said, sure, he can do it,
00:45:36but not as good as the bull.
00:45:39Oh, I...
00:45:42You sure this is the Flora's place?
00:46:02Yep.
00:46:03Number 69 Cherry Lane.
00:46:06Go.
00:46:06Well, now we've got to find number 45.
00:46:21Right on time.
00:46:39Andy, Flora!
00:46:46Oh, hi!
00:46:48Hello!
00:46:48Good to see you.
00:46:50My, you girls are so big.
00:46:52Well, we've grown up.
00:46:54How long has it been?
00:46:56Oh, five years.
00:46:58My, you look terrific.
00:47:01So, uh, this is what you've been writing us about,
00:47:04huh, Flora?
00:47:05Oh, you, uh, sure are living in style.
00:47:09Well, don't just stand there.
00:47:11Come on in.
00:47:13Make yourselves at home.
00:47:15Wow, you sure have a pretty view.
00:47:17Yeah.
00:47:17You girls, look at the view while I clean up.
00:47:20How's Aunt Ted?
00:47:21Oh, she's...
00:47:23She's fine.
00:47:25Well, what if this place sure gets messy?
00:47:28Thank you, honey.
00:47:29Well, sit down.
00:47:31Sit down.
00:47:33Let's hear her tell me all about it.
00:47:35Well, there ain't much to tell.
00:47:37Well, me and Mary Lou's on a mission of mercy.
00:47:40You don't say.
00:47:41What's wrong?
00:47:42Well, I ain't gonna mince words, Flora.
00:47:45That damn piker's fixing to sell the diner out from under Aunt Tess in six days.
00:47:50Well, we'd be beholden if you'd give us the $5,641.87, and we'll be on our way back to Titwillow.
00:48:01Hold on there just a minute, baby sister.
00:48:04I'd like to help you out, but I'm sort of between sugar daddies at the moment, and I ain't got the $5,600.
00:48:14Well, Flora, darling, I don't mean to pry into your private matters and all, but wasn't that your sugar daddy we met coming in here?
00:48:21Annie, honey, you aren't my sugar daddy.
00:48:24He's just a good gentleman friend.
00:48:26As a matter of fact, I'm sort of waiting around to find a new rich sugar daddy.
00:48:31Well, Flora, sweetheart, you just better get your precious ass in gear.
00:48:36Annie, baby, I'm gonna have to be flat out with you.
00:48:39If you need that kind of money, you're dipping in the wrong well.
00:48:44Well, don't that beat off.
00:48:46Damn, Annie, what are we gonna do?
00:48:49Have a beer.
00:48:51Well, it looks like there's only one thing to do, Marilee.
00:48:55What's that?
00:48:56We're gonna have to find us our own sugar daddy.
00:49:01Flora, honey, you're gonna have to help us out.
00:49:04Well, honey, if that's what you want, I'll do my best.
00:49:08Well, we gotta find a sugar daddy that has lots of money.
00:49:12You just tell us where to go, darling, and we'll take it from there.
00:49:16Well, first thing you gotta do is you gotta get yourself some clothes.
00:49:22I got clothes.
00:49:24Honey, you need some hustling clothes.
00:49:28Something that'll knock their eyes out.
00:49:30I'll tell you the name of a place to get them.
00:49:32And a place to use them.
00:49:42Yes, sirree.
00:49:44This is the one.
00:49:45Let's know what I've got.
00:49:47But tell them they ain't getting it cheap.
00:49:49Honey, you look good enough to eat.
00:49:51I sure hope you like southern food.
00:49:54Well, what do you think, lady?
00:49:55No hurry now.
00:49:56Well, no, I don't like the color.
00:49:59They're kind of like a shit brand.
00:50:02Hmm.
00:50:09Don't you happen to have some white, like, majorette kind of boots?
00:50:15Major?
00:50:15Oh, yeah.
00:50:19Something like this.
00:50:20Yeah!
00:50:21Mm-hmm.
00:50:24Do you want cowhide?
00:50:25Oh, now, those are real comfortable.
00:50:31Real nice.
00:50:32Nice pussy.
00:50:35Nice pussy.
00:50:37It sure is, lady.
00:50:39Would I try the other one out?
00:50:41Oh, sure.
00:50:41Oh, Annie, I don't, I don't think I ought to be going in there.
00:51:04I ain't dressed for a place like this, okay?
00:51:06Well, you, I am, and you promised to be my manager.
00:51:09Now, come on.
00:51:09Come on.
00:51:24Yes?
00:51:25Bonjour.
00:51:26Mr. Danton, please.
00:51:27I am Louis Danton.
00:51:29You are, of course, Miss Boudin.
00:51:32Your sister told me to expect you.
00:51:34You are Miss Boudin.
00:51:36Oh, how completely sensational.
00:51:38Won't you come here, please?
00:51:40I don't mind if I do.
00:51:42Thank you, sir.
00:51:49Uh, this is Mary Lou Carter.
00:51:52She's my business manager.
00:51:53How intriguing.
00:51:55I handle all Annie's affairs.
00:51:58How double intriguing.
00:52:00Would you follow me, please?
00:52:02Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:52:14Holy shit.
00:52:16Boy, this place takes my breath away.
00:52:19So far, so rich.
00:52:21Shh.
00:52:26Won't you sit down, please?
00:52:28Would you care for a Black Rossian?
00:52:36No, sir.
00:52:37I'm a good girl.
00:52:39I don't hush any.
00:52:41It's a sugar daddy's drink.
00:52:43Oh.
00:52:44No, thank you, Mr. Danton.
00:52:46We can drink later.
00:52:47Now, I think we ought to get down to business.
00:52:50Business?
00:52:50Well, we have to make sure that you meet our qualifications.
00:52:55Just sit yourself down, Mr. Danton, and we'll get on with this.
00:52:58Yes, of course.
00:52:59But isn't this, uh, rather unique?
00:53:05Now, Mr. Danton, are you married?
00:53:09Not at the moment.
00:53:11Good.
00:53:11I ain't no prude, but I ain't a homewrecker either.
00:53:14Quiet, Annie.
00:53:15Are you now, or have you ever been, a communist or an atheist?
00:53:22No.
00:53:23I'm a hedonist and libertarian.
00:53:29What's that?
00:53:30Go on to the next one.
00:53:32Do you have, or have you ever had, a social disease?
00:53:36Social disease?
00:53:37What is that?
00:53:39Specs on the pecker.
00:53:41Specs on the pecker?
00:53:42No.
00:53:43A freckle or two, no speck.
00:53:46Now, you can skip the rest of those questions and get down to brass tacks.
00:53:54Well, I guess you qualify.
00:53:56Now, I think we ought to discuss the business of payment.
00:54:00Payment?
00:54:01Of course.
00:54:02But how do I know how much to pay before I know what I am buying?
00:54:10Never thought of that.
00:54:11I suppose you'd sort of like to sample the milk before you buy the cow, so to speak.
00:54:18Well, I could be induced to pull on a tittoe, too.
00:54:23I don't suppose you'll be needing me here anymore.
00:54:26I'll see you out in the truck, Annie.
00:54:29It's been a pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Danton.
00:54:31The rest is up to you.
00:54:35Oh.
00:54:37Shall we go to the boudoir?
00:54:39What's that?
00:54:41That's French for workshop.
00:54:42Oh.
00:54:43This sure is some stable you've got, Mr. Danton.
00:54:54Oh, I'm sure you will find everything you need in here, Annie.
00:54:59I'll just slip into something more comfortable, if you don't mind.
00:55:03You hurry on back, Mr. Danton.
00:55:08Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:13Louie.
00:55:14Louie.
00:55:15Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:16Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:17Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:18Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:19Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:20Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:21Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:22Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:23Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:24Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:25Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:26Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:27Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:28Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:29Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:30Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:31Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:32Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:33Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:34Oh, you may call me Louie.
00:55:35I am the Emperor, not William Charles!
00:55:45I am the Emperor, not William Charles!
00:56:06Remember what's wrong!
00:56:14I came!
00:56:17I sold!
00:56:20I conquered!
00:56:24Kiss my foot, I'm coming!
00:56:28Kiss my ass, I'm going!
00:56:30Josephine, kiss my bonaparte!
00:56:41Lordy, Lordy!
00:57:00Let's go!
00:57:18Yay!
00:57:24Yes?
00:57:26Flora?
00:57:27This is Flora. You're late. Come on in.
00:57:32My name is Angelo. Harry sent me.
00:57:35Do you remember Harry from the Long Distance Truckers Convention last month?
00:57:39Oh, Harry, he's a big driver. I used to shift his stick quite a lot.
00:57:44Is this place okay?
00:57:46Okay. It always has been.
00:57:48Yes, this is my first time.
00:57:50It is. Congratulations.
00:57:52Thank you. No, no, I mean my first time with...
00:57:55You see, I'm a married man.
00:57:57I want you all. Come on, take your clothes off.
00:57:59Uh, well, uh, I gotta be extra careful, you see, because I, I, I got a wife.
00:58:04Oh, well, just relax. Let me handle it.
00:58:08Well, I'm a little... Take your clothes off.
00:58:09I know, but I'm a little nervous. I've never done anything like this.
00:58:12It's always hard the first time.
00:58:14Well, I've never done anything like this before.
00:58:16You gotta be kidding. What did you do on your honeymoon? Play backgammon?
00:58:19How did you know?
00:58:21Women's intuition. Come on, take your clothes off.
00:58:25Uh, look, uh, tell me, have you had a medical examination recently?
00:58:29Would you like your family doctor to examine me?
00:58:32Do we have time?
00:58:34Time is money. If you wanna pay for it, I'll go for it. Hysterectomy.
00:58:38Huh?
00:58:39Take your clothes off.
00:58:40Honey, what I'm trying, what I'm trying to say is...
00:58:44I won't bring anything home to my wife, will I?
00:58:46Sure.
00:58:47What?
00:58:48I'll get green stamps. Move over.
00:58:50Uh-huh. Oh. Oh.
00:58:57A little lower.
00:59:03Oh, my God. Who's there? Nobody can see me here.
00:59:05I don't know.
00:59:06Who's there?
00:59:07Six-pack, Flora. Open up.
00:59:09I gotta get out of here.
00:59:10You goddamn right. I can't have six-packs see you.
00:59:14Uh, quick, quick, jump in there.
00:59:16Here, here.
00:59:19What the hell's the matter with you?
00:59:23Every time I get nervous, I sneeze.
00:59:25You're lucky. Every time I get nervous, I fart.
00:59:28Now, get in, hold your nose and be quiet.
00:59:34I didn't expect you back so soon.
00:59:36Neither did we.
00:59:37But you didn't tell us that that Mr. Louis Danton was nuttier than a fruitcake.
00:59:42Well, honey, them are the tricks of the trade.
00:59:47Well, no, thank you, Flora.
00:59:49I got better things to do than to mess around with foreign weirdos.
00:59:55Well, what are you all planning to do now?
00:59:57Louis is the richest man I know, so it's gotta be downhill from here on in.
01:00:00Well, that does sort of put a monkey wrench into our plans, all right.
01:00:05Ha-choo!
01:00:08What was that?
01:00:09It must have been something I ate.
01:00:12You got me money.
01:00:13This dress and boots kind of wiped us out.
01:00:17Well, I'd like to help you out, honey bunch, but my ship hasn't come in yet.
01:00:22Maybe you'd best think about getting a job while you're looking.
01:00:25Well, if we're working, we can't be looking.
01:00:27One of you can be looking while the other's working.
01:00:33Well, Flora, you got any ideas where we might go looking?
01:00:37Well, I used to pick up a trick or two.
01:00:40A lot of rich men hang around the bar at the International Hotel.
01:00:44Think we could do all right there?
01:00:46Don't see how you can miss.
01:00:48You'd better get yourselves right over there.
01:00:52Well, I think we best be going.
01:00:54Oh, let me know how you make up.
01:00:57Oh, you'll be the first to know.
01:00:59Bye now.
01:01:17Could...
01:01:19Could you do me a favor and change the green stamps?
01:01:21See, my wife saves blue chips.
01:01:25Yeah!
01:01:29Hey, Carmelo.
01:01:31About to dry up here, boy.
01:01:34Hi, y'all.
01:01:36Well, look what just bounced in.
01:01:40The boobs, the twins.
01:01:42Crack another nut, Carmelo!
01:01:44Yes, senor, come on.
01:01:46There he is.
01:01:48You just saddle right on up there, little darling.
01:01:52How many of them things are you drunk now?
01:01:54Oh, about 14 or 15.
01:01:57How are you feeling?
01:01:59Starting to get a little buzz on.
01:02:02You just tell Carmelo what the most beautiful girl in this world wants to drink.
01:02:08Cock an ear over here, Carmelo!
01:02:10Give me a beer.
01:02:12Give me a job.
01:02:14Oh, you want to work?
01:02:16I'll give you a job.
01:02:17Come on, I'll show you where to dress.
01:02:19Come on, here. Come on.
01:02:20Now you're talking.
01:02:22Hey! What about the other one, Carmelo?
01:02:23Ain't you gonna take her on, too?
01:02:25Nice of you to think about me, cowboy.
01:02:27But I already got all my work lined up.
01:02:30Oh, call me Jack, little darling.
01:02:33You know, you're just about the cutest little filly I ever laid my eyes on.
01:02:40I'll bet you and me could set the world on fire.
01:02:44I never take up with married men.
01:02:46Ain't that a coincidence?
01:02:48Neither do I.
01:02:50Well, ain't that a wind ring on your finger?
01:02:52Well, it's better than having it around my neck, and that's the truth.
01:02:58I gotta tell you something, little darling.
01:03:01When women get old, they sometimes get mean, ornery, and ugly.
01:03:08And my wife was all of them right from the start.
01:03:11Well, why did you marry her then?
01:03:14Oh, it was a matter of survival.
01:03:16We was having engine wars then, and she could drop a Shoshonee at a thousand yards.
01:03:23Sounds like a fine woman to me.
01:03:26Oh, she's getting much better since we got twin beds.
01:03:29Twin beds? How does that help?
01:03:32Well, her bed's in Dallas, and mine's in Miami Beach.
01:03:35Well, that's a mighty tall story, cowboy.
01:03:40You're damn right.
01:03:42Well, I'd like to stick around and jock, but I gotta get going.
01:03:45Time's a way to...
01:03:46Oh, honey, I've upset you.
01:03:48Here, let me make it up to you.
01:03:51I got something for you here.
01:03:53I'll put the damn thing I had right here.
01:03:56Oh!
01:03:58You know what that is?
01:04:00That is a genuine Russian birth control pill.
01:04:03Oh, here it is. Here it is right here.
01:04:08Look at that.
01:04:10That's for you, little darling.
01:04:13Lucky stone.
01:04:15Why, it matches the sparkle in your eyes and the bigness of your heart.
01:04:21There.
01:04:23Now, don't that look pretty.
01:04:25Oh, I can't take that.
01:04:26Oh, it's just a lucky stone.
01:04:29I'd be mighty hurt if you didn't, honey bunch.
01:04:31Mighty hurt.
01:04:33Besides, you never know when you might need a little luck.
01:04:36Ha! You got rats, Carmelo!
01:04:39I don't like this, Senor Jack.
01:04:41I got the idea for the Playboy Cops.
01:04:44Damn, I like her tail.
01:04:46Annie, you better get yourself a sugar daddy quick,
01:04:48because I don't know how much of this I can take.
01:04:49What will it be, Miss?
01:04:50Give me a beer in the can.
01:04:52I can't take it to you in the can. You'll have to drink it here.
01:04:54Oh. All right.
01:04:56Are you waiting for someone, uh, in particular?
01:04:58Sure am. I'm here to find me a sugar daddy.
01:05:01And I'd be most appreciative if you'd point out the richest one.
01:05:05Oh, I'm here to find me a sugar daddy.
01:05:07Well, I'd just keep my eyes open and point out the first one that comes in.
01:05:08Will you do that for me?
01:05:09I sure will.
01:05:10Are you new in town? I haven't seen you here before.
01:05:11Oh, I'm here to find me a sugar daddy.
01:05:12All right.
01:05:13Are you waiting for someone, uh, in particular?
01:05:15Sure am.
01:05:16I'm here to find me a sugar daddy.
01:05:17And I'd be most appreciative if you'd point out the richest one.
01:05:20Well, I'd just keep my eyes open and point out the first one that comes in.
01:05:26Will you do that for me?
01:05:27I sure will.
01:05:28Are you new in town? I haven't seen you here before.
01:05:29Oh, I just got in a couple of days ago.
01:05:30You plan to stay here long, Miss, uh, Miss, uh...
01:05:31Uh, Bodine. Annie Bodine.
01:05:32No, just till I find me a rich man.
01:05:33Well, you shouldn't have any trouble there. There's those of them around here.
01:05:35Well, I'm here to find me a rich man.
01:05:36I'm here to find you.
01:05:37I'm here to find you.
01:05:38I'm here to find you.
01:05:39I'm here to find you.
01:05:40I'm here to find you.
01:05:41I'm here to find you.
01:05:42I'm here to find you.
01:05:43I'm here to find you.
01:05:44I'm here to find you.
01:05:50Really?
01:05:51Are you rich?
01:05:52I'm as rich as Rockefeller.
01:05:54Rockefeller?
01:05:55Say, that is rich, all right.
01:05:57What's your name?
01:05:58My name is Mr. O'Meyer.
01:06:00Oh, Meyer, huh?
01:06:03What's the O stand for?
01:06:05Oscar.
01:06:06Oh, what do you do, Oscar?
01:06:08Oh, nothing, nothing.
01:06:09Nothing?
01:06:10Well, the rich don't have to work, you see.
01:06:13Well, that figures.
01:06:15Would you, uh, mind excusing me, Miss Bodine?
01:06:18Even the rich have to, uh, use the men's room for time.
01:06:22Well, you come on back, Oscar.
01:06:23You hear?
01:06:33Uh, which is Miss Bodine, sweet please?
01:06:34Uh, pardon?
01:06:35Uh, Bodine?
01:06:36I'm sorry, sir.
01:06:37We have no guest here by that name.
01:06:39You mean to say you have screwed up my reservation?
01:06:42My secretary called here last night from Nashville.
01:06:44Miss Bodine is flying in on a private plane at this very moment.
01:06:47She will be here in five minutes, and she expects to find her suite ready.
01:06:50Uh, uh, what did you say her name was again, sir?
01:06:53You mean to say that you have never heard of Annie Bodine,
01:06:56the biggest name in country western singing?
01:06:58My God, man, she's a superstar!
01:07:00Uh, just a moment, please.
01:07:02Uh, we have the, uh, Bimini suite available.
01:07:06Is that the best you have?
01:07:08I'm sorry, sir.
01:07:09The presidential suite is occupied.
01:07:11And by whom may I ask?
01:07:13By a very important Texan.
01:07:16All right, all right.
01:07:17The Bimini suite will have to do, but make sure that it's ready.
01:07:20And no publicity.
01:07:21She's, uh, ducking a date in Vegas.
01:07:23Oh, I see.
01:07:26Now, would you sign this, please, Mr...
01:07:28My Oscar Mayer.
01:07:30Not THE Oscar Mayer.
01:07:32Please, I'm just here as her manager.
01:07:34And send up a magnum of champagne and a large bowl of fruit.
01:07:37Oh, you can count on me, Mr. Myer.
01:07:40Good.
01:07:47Yes, sir.
01:07:48I'd like to see those rings there, please.
01:07:49Oh, we've got some beautiful turquoise.
01:07:52No, I'd like to see something more like this.
01:07:54Now, uh, how much is this one here?
01:07:56That's $4.95.
01:07:58Four, four not...
01:07:59Uh, I'm getting this for my little girl, you see.
01:08:01And I'm not quite sure of the size.
01:08:02So, uh, if it doesn't fit, could I have my money back?
01:08:04Well, certainly.
01:08:05Thank you very much.
01:08:06Oh, that's $4.95.
01:08:08Oh, $4.95.
01:08:11I have a little spare change here.
01:08:13I'll see if I've got a hundred or something.
01:08:14Here's, uh, five.
01:08:16Keep the change.
01:08:26Well, I'm glad you're still here.
01:08:27Of course I'm still here.
01:08:29You think I'd run out on a hot prospect?
01:08:31Hotter than you think.
01:08:33Let me see the same beautiful thing around.
01:08:36Woo!
01:08:37That's sure pretty.
01:08:39Is that a diamond?
01:08:40Of course it's a diamond.
01:08:42It's really something.
01:08:44Does that mean you're gonna take care of me?
01:08:47I'd certainly like to.
01:08:49Whenever you want to start.
01:08:51Hot damn, Oscar.
01:08:52You got yourself a deal.
01:08:54How do you like that?
01:08:55I got me the jackpot.
01:08:56Say, you don't go in for any of that weird stuff, do you?
01:09:01Like, uh, funny outfits or swords or anything like that?
01:09:05Annie, what do you take me for?
01:09:07Woo, Rich!
01:09:08Shall we go?
01:09:09There's a duck butt!
01:09:10Woo!
01:09:11Oh, my God!
01:09:12Do I get to live in a place like this all the time?
01:09:27Well, of course you do, my darling.
01:09:28Oh!
01:09:29Oh!
01:09:34Oh, my God!
01:09:36Do I get to live in a place like this all the time?
01:09:39Why, of course you do, my darling.
01:09:41Oh!
01:10:03Penny.
01:10:06Oh, Oscar, I should have come to Miami years ago.
01:10:09You had.
01:10:11Oh!
01:10:41Can we go swimming in the pool later?
01:10:42Uh, later.
01:10:43Uh, later.
01:10:44Uh, later.
01:10:45Oh, Oscar the man.
01:10:46Oh, Oscar the man.
01:10:47Oh, Oscar the man.
01:10:48Here's a wild goose.
01:10:49Or, would you go swimming in the pool later?
01:10:55Yeah, would you go swimming?
01:11:00in the pool later?
01:11:02Later.
01:11:13Oh, Oscar, man.
01:11:26Oh, look, all the proof.
01:11:30It even has my name on it.
01:11:32Really?
01:11:33Yeah.
01:11:34Miss Bodine, enjoy your stay.
01:11:36The management.
01:11:38How'd they know my name?
01:11:40Because I told them.
01:11:41Oh, this is terrific.
01:11:44Look at all this fruit.
01:11:46Mm-hmm.
01:11:48There's apples and oranges.
01:11:50Mm-hmm.
01:11:51And cherries and bananas.
01:11:54You want a piece?
01:11:55I certainly do.
01:11:56Okay.
01:11:58Here's a banana for you.
01:12:03And I'll take a big, red, juicy cherry for me.
01:12:06But I don't want a banana.
01:12:08Oh.
01:12:09Well, I'll eat your banana.
01:12:12And you can take my cherry.
01:12:14Mm-hmm.
01:12:15That felt real good.
01:12:16Which one of you did it?
01:12:17Mm-hmm.
01:12:18Mm-hmm.
01:12:19Well, you know, I have something real luscious for the guy who's man enough to admit it.
01:12:23Mm-hmm.
01:12:24Mm-hmm.
01:12:25Mm-hmm.
01:12:26Mm-hmm.
01:12:27Mm-hmm.
01:12:28Mm-hmm.
01:12:29It was me.
01:12:30Mm-hmm.
01:12:31It was me.
01:12:32Are you sure?
01:12:33I wouldn't want to make a mistake.
01:12:34Well, sure, I'm sure.
01:12:35I mean, it was me, wasn't it?
01:12:36Mm-hmm.
01:12:37Mm-hmm.
01:12:38Mm-hmm.
01:12:39Well...
01:12:40Mm-hmm.
01:12:41It was...
01:12:42It was me.
01:12:43Are you sure?
01:12:44I wouldn't want to make a mistake.
01:12:47Well, sure, I'm sure.
01:12:48I mean, it was me, wasn't it?
01:12:50You did it, yeah.
01:12:51Are you sure?
01:12:52Well, certainly, I'm sure.
01:12:53Good.
01:12:59Thank you, and fuck you.
01:13:19Yeah?
01:13:20Uh, Miss Bodine?
01:13:21Yeah?
01:13:22Oh, this is the desk.
01:13:24Uh, your luggage hasn't arrived as yet, and, uh, we've been wondering, is there some problem?
01:13:30No problem.
01:13:31I...
01:13:32I ain't expecting any.
01:13:33But your...
01:13:34Your manager said that you were expecting luggage and ducking a date in Las Vegas.
01:13:40Mary Lou?
01:13:41How did you find out about Mary Lou?
01:13:43Mary Lou?
01:13:44Who's Mary Lou?
01:13:46Mr. Meyer said that...
01:13:48Oh!
01:13:49Oh, Oscar.
01:13:50No, uh, he ain't my manager.
01:13:52He's my sugar daddy.
01:13:53Ain't ya, Oscar?
01:13:54Oscar?
01:13:55Better luck next time.
01:14:02Miss Eddie Slicker.
01:14:03Miss Bodine?
01:14:04Miss Bodine?
01:14:05Miss Bodine?
01:14:06Miss Bodine?
01:14:07Miss Bodine?
01:14:08Miss Bodine?
01:14:09Miss Bodine?
01:14:10Miss Bodine?
01:14:11Miss Bodine?
01:14:12Oh, my God.
01:14:13Son of a bitch!
01:14:15My ring!
01:14:17Oh, my God.
01:14:19Son of a bitch!
01:14:24My ring!
01:14:27Oh!
01:14:28Oh!
01:14:30Yes?
01:14:32Oh, yes?
01:14:46Oh, thank you.
01:14:55Diff and dumb.
01:14:57Oh, here.
01:15:02Sounds good.
01:15:09Same to you, buddy.
01:15:14You're cute.
01:15:27I got screwed.
01:15:30I knew you could do it.
01:15:35I gotta talk to you.
01:15:37Oh, don't mind him.
01:15:39He's deaf and dumb.
01:15:41Why is it that I'm meeting up with all the crooks and the weirdos and the slickers?
01:15:46It seems like that's all there is in this here city.
01:15:49You're lucky.
01:15:50You found that out in two days.
01:15:53Took me eight years.
01:15:55Well, I ain't giving up, Flora.
01:15:57I know there's a sugar daddy waiting for me out there somewhere.
01:16:01You got any more advice?
01:16:03Honey, get your ass back to Titwillow before it's too late.
01:16:08You all come back and see us again, you hear?
01:16:13We're lucky.
01:16:14We're lucky.
01:16:15We're lucky.
01:16:16You all come back.
01:16:17We're lucky.
01:16:18We'll be back.
01:17:19Oh, well, if it ain't my little filly.
01:17:24Oh, Jack.
01:17:26Jack, are you okay?
01:17:27Sure, I'm okay.
01:17:30Somebody just moved the goddamn bar, that's all.
01:17:33Well, what happened?
01:17:34Yeah, did you come up with anything?
01:17:36Shit, no.
01:17:37For two days, I searched high and low to find me a good, honest, upright, church-going, goddamn, God-fearing, sugar-daddy.
01:17:47You hear that, Carmelo?
01:17:52That's truth, boy.
01:17:53That's American truth you're hearing straight from the mouth of a southern woman.
01:17:59The odds of Texas are upon us.
01:18:02Crack another nut, Carmelo.
01:18:04I didn't know Texas was in the south.
01:18:06Oh, my God, can't you see he's in terrible shape?
01:18:09Why don't you take him home?
01:18:11Well, I can't leave the bar all along.
01:18:13Well, where does he live?
01:18:14At the International Hotel.
01:18:16The International?
01:18:18You know where that is?
01:18:19Oh, I sure do.
01:18:21Come on, cowboy.
01:18:23Hasta luego, amigo!
01:18:29Te vino en la banda!
01:18:32El cabelero!
01:18:37Where the air is pure!
01:18:42That's it!
01:18:43Right there!
01:18:44Well, we should not have that sickter's key.
01:18:46And the zephyr's frown.
01:18:48I think I found something, but it ain't a kill.
01:18:50You know? I got it.
01:18:52Whoa! That ain't it.
01:18:54You can't milk a bull.
01:18:56Here it is.
01:18:58And the breeze
01:19:00above me
01:19:02and light
01:19:04that I
01:19:06would not exchange.
01:19:12Oh, my God, take a look
01:19:14at this. You sure we got the right
01:19:16place? Well, we got in, didn't we?
01:19:18Oh, come on in, come on in.
01:19:20How about a little drag?
01:19:22I think maybe
01:19:24it's time you went to sleep, Jack.
01:19:26Sleep, pal? I don't want to go to sleep.
01:19:28You go to sleep.
01:19:34Whoa! Jack!
01:19:36You turkey! Come on!
01:19:38Get up!
01:19:40You, come on, Jack.
01:19:42Buffalo, come on!
01:19:44Come on!
01:19:46Get up!
01:19:50Hey, come on, y'all.
01:19:52Just play leapfrog.
01:19:54Oh, Jack, Jack.
01:19:56Oh, Jack, you mother.
01:19:58Hey, where the hell are you girls?
01:20:00Where are we going?
01:20:02This is ridiculous.
01:20:04Grab his belt.
01:20:06Wee-haw!
01:20:08Wee-haw!
01:20:10Turn him around! Turn him around!
01:20:12Wee-haw!
01:20:14Oh, Jack!
01:20:16Oh, Jack!
01:20:18Jack!
01:20:20Wait!
01:20:22He's too drunk to sleep!
01:20:24Oh!
01:20:26I'm okay.
01:20:28Oh, coffee!
01:20:30I'm gonna drink!
01:20:32I'm trying to put it to bed!
01:20:34Oh, shit!
01:20:36Woo-ee!
01:20:38Oh, Jack!
01:20:39Oh, here.
01:20:40Here, let's just get this.
01:20:42Here.
01:20:43Here.
01:20:44Okay.
01:20:45Woo-hoo!
01:20:46Okay.
01:20:47Woo-hoo!
01:20:48All right!
01:20:49Here we go!
01:20:50Yee-haw!
01:20:51Look at that!
01:20:52Hey!
01:20:53Yee-haw!
01:20:54She's winking at me!
01:20:57Cut that out, Jack!
01:20:59You're more trouble than you were!
01:21:01Oh!
01:21:02Oh!
01:21:03I'm worth a lot more trouble than you think!
01:21:07Not unless you find me a sugar daddy, you light!
01:21:11Oh!
01:21:12Now get your ass over here!
01:21:15Oh!
01:21:16What the hell's all foreign important about a sugar daddy?
01:21:20Well, it ain't so much the daddy, is it?
01:21:22Sugar!
01:21:23Sugar?
01:21:24Yeah!
01:21:25You mean money?
01:21:26Hell, money ain't no problem!
01:21:28Whatcha need it for?
01:21:30Well, the bank is gonna pull out the rug from under my Aunt Tess, and I swore I'd bring back
01:21:36the money!
01:21:37You poor little critter!
01:21:40How much you damn foreman's wonk?
01:21:43Fifty-six hundred dollars!
01:21:46Chicken feed!
01:21:48Where's my money?
01:21:50Damn, I'll show them who can pull out a rug off from underneath a fine upstanding southern lady!
01:21:57Here you go!
01:21:58One, two, three, four, five, six thousand dollars!
01:22:03Ain't got no change!
01:22:04Oh!
01:22:05Six thousand dollars?!
01:22:06Oh!
01:22:07Oh!
01:22:08Oh, Jack!
01:22:09Oh!
01:22:10Oh!
01:22:11Oh!
01:22:12Oh!
01:22:13Jack Quiddleston, you son of a bitch!
01:22:16Open this door!
01:22:17Who's that?
01:22:18Oh!
01:22:19Oh!
01:22:20Reckon it's the little woman!
01:22:25There you are!
01:22:26You worn out piece of rawhide!
01:22:29Oh, Edna!
01:22:31How many times I told you to knock first?
01:22:34I leave you alone for a minute and you're out whoring and drinking!
01:22:38Yeah!
01:22:39Put those hands up where I can see them, you old galoot!
01:22:42How much were you gonna give her?
01:22:44Well, Edna!
01:22:45It was only six thousand!
01:22:47It ain't what it seems, Mrs. Whiddleston!
01:22:50We ain't got time for this joy!
01:22:53This trouble a-brewin'!
01:22:55Slap leather, Jack!
01:22:56Them damn Shoshones is liquored up!
01:22:58Liquored up?!
01:22:59Who gave far water to the fuckin' Shoshones?
01:23:02Ah, damn it!
01:23:03Now, where's my boots?
01:23:05Here they are, bad guys!
01:23:08What's goin' on, Jack?
01:23:09Where are you goin'?
01:23:10Sorry, little lady.
01:23:11Shoshones!
01:23:13Come on, Jack!
01:23:14The jet's warmed up and the boys are standin' by!
01:23:17Hey, Scamishers!
01:23:23Come on, Edna!
01:23:24Move your gun, gangay!
01:23:29Come on, Jack!
01:23:30Come on, Jack!
01:23:31Come on, Jack!
01:23:32Come on, Jack!
01:23:33Come on, Jack!
01:23:34Come on, Jack!
01:23:35Come on, Jack!
01:23:36Come on, Jack!
01:23:37Come on, Jack!
01:23:38Come on, Jack!
01:23:39Hey, Annie, what happened?
01:23:40Are you alright?
01:23:41Where's Jack?
01:23:42Shoshones!
01:23:43Shoshones!
01:23:44What?
01:23:45I don't understand!
01:23:48Neither do I, Mary Lou!
01:23:51But we're goin' home!
01:23:56What?
01:23:57We'll just have to get the money some other way!
01:24:02But I thought that...
01:24:03Hey, how come your dress is unzipped?
01:24:15I finally got rid of the rats around this place!
01:24:18How'd you do that, Hank?
01:24:19Well, I went down the cellar and I put one trap by the apple barrel.
01:24:23I put one trap by the nut barrel.
01:24:25Where'd you catch them?
01:24:26By the apples?
01:24:27Nope!
01:24:28I caught them by the nut!
01:24:30Lordy, lordy!
01:24:34Have faith, Aunt Cass!
01:24:36We'll get the money somehow!
01:24:38We're gonna need more than faith, honey!
01:24:40We're gonna need a miracle!
01:24:42Here you are, Mr. Bates!
01:24:45Thank you very much, Annie!
01:24:47Say!
01:24:48That's a mighty pretty stone!
01:24:49May I see it?
01:24:50Why, Shirley!
01:24:51Thank you!
01:24:52Hey, Annie!
01:24:53Here comes Piper and the Sheriff!
01:24:57Mary Lou, can I have some one of you, please?
01:25:00Sure, Mr. Bates!
01:25:01Afternoon, Tess!
01:25:02Mary Lou!
01:25:03Annie!
01:25:04Well, I guess you know, I'm here!
01:25:06Get on with it, Mr. Parker!
01:25:07Now, Tess, you know how I hate to do this, but...
01:25:10Well, business is business!
01:25:12Yeah, the oldest profession in the world!
01:25:14Now, it's all legal and upright, Annie!
01:25:17There ain't nothing to do with it!
01:25:19Well, you know how I hate to do this, but...
01:25:21Well, business is business!
01:25:22Yeah, the oldest profession in the world!
01:25:24Now, it's all legal and upright, Annie!
01:25:26There ain't no cause to talk that way!
01:25:28The hell there ain't!
01:25:30The color is flawless!
01:25:32You come over here and try to take everything Aunt Tess worked for her whole life!
01:25:36Now, I said it's all legal and you can't stop him!
01:25:40Well, you can serve as many papers as you like, Mr. Piker!
01:25:43Because you're gonna have one hell of a fight when you try to get us out of here!
01:25:46Right!
01:25:47Annie, can I see you a minute?
01:25:49Mr. Bates, will you please keep out of this?
01:25:51I'm sorry, Annie, but I haven't seen a stone like this in 20 years!
01:25:55I'll give you $5,000 for cash!
01:25:57What?!
01:25:58All right, seven!
01:25:59What?!
01:26:00$7,000 for that stone?
01:26:03Now, if you'll just sign a bill of sale, I'll get you the $7,000 from the bank!
01:26:07Why, Mr. Bates, I just purely don't understand it!
01:26:11You got yourself a deal!
01:26:13Say it!
01:26:14Oh!
01:26:15Lordy!
01:26:16Lordy!
01:26:17Well, I guess that does it!
01:26:19We got the money if you got the cash in that puny little bank of yours, Mr. Piker!
01:26:24Cash?
01:26:25$7,000 cash?
01:26:27Well, I don't know!
01:26:30You'll have to give me a couple of days!
01:26:32Well, you just get on over there and start counting!
01:26:35Because Mr. Bates here has got to finish his lunch!
01:26:37Well, uh...
01:26:38Well, uh...
01:26:39You enjoy your lunch, and I'll see you all later!
01:26:43Ha! Ha! Ha!
01:26:45Surely our badge just is all over!
01:26:46No!
01:26:47Oh!
01:26:48One of these days!
01:26:50Oh!
01:26:51Oh!
01:26:52Oh!
01:26:53Oh!
01:26:54Oh!
01:26:55Oh!
01:26:56Oh!
01:26:57Oh!
01:26:58Oh!
01:26:59Oh!
01:27:00Oh!
01:27:01Oh!
01:27:02Oh!
01:27:03Oh!
01:27:04Oh!
01:27:05Oh!
01:27:06Oh!
01:27:07Oh!
01:27:08Oh!
01:27:09Oh!
01:27:10Oh!
01:27:11Oh!
01:27:12Oh!
01:27:13Oh!
01:27:14Oh!
01:27:15Oh!
01:27:16Oh!
01:27:17Oh!
01:27:18Oh!
01:27:19Oh!
01:27:20Oh!
01:27:21Oh!
01:27:23Oh!
01:27:25Oh!
01:27:26Oh!
01:27:27Oh...
01:27:28Oh!
01:27:31Oh!
01:27:33Oh,
01:27:34Eno!
01:27:35That's the great thing,
01:27:37Oh!
01:27:38Oh!
01:27:39Oh,
01:27:43She rides through town on a fucking horse
01:27:45They don't all fit in the saddle, of course
01:27:48When she does her stuff with smiles and views
01:27:51Her kisses burn your ears
01:27:53Everybody now bang, bang
01:27:56Good times clang when Anna comes banging around
01:27:59Bang, bang, bang
01:28:01The whole damn gang would love to bang it down
01:28:05Bang, bang, bang
01:28:07The whole damn gang would love to bang it down
01:28:11With love to bang Anna down
01:28:13With love to bang Anna down
01:28:16With love to bang Anna down
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