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00:00You
00:30You okay?
00:34Can I get you anything? I'm fine. You sure? I got Xanax Ativan Ambien. I think this might be a laxative
00:44I'll always take a laxative
00:51I'm just so confused
00:54You marry you have precious babies those babies have babies you keep a house
01:00Running the best you can you wear tiny hateful panties they go up into your crank and split you in two because you love him you
01:10You build a life in sickness and in health because you took a veil when you were young and skinny
01:18And you could have married little Tommy Turner. He was so cute. So cute
01:24It didn't matter that he only came up to here
01:30You chose Bill Murphy
01:36See was solid and kind
01:38Could have been a little bit more chatty, you know men only have so many words. I use in a day
01:44Sometimes not even words. It's more like noises
01:49And then after 33 years of complete and utter devotion you find out he's run off with a younger woman
01:55How do you know she's younger she has to be otherwise? I'm driving off a bridge
02:01Any idea how long this has been going on?
02:03I'm no Sherlock Holmes, but I'd say right around the time Amazon delivered that nose hair trimmer
02:10So what do you want to do you want to break some dishes set his clothes on fire?
02:14Get drunk on Kahlua and wander around the Walmart in your nightgown. That was you
02:19All I'm saying is I've been where you are more than once
02:22twice
02:23Okay
02:26But when it does come when the breakdown of all breakdowns hits I'll be there. Oh you will has you been there for me?
02:33But now it's your turn
02:35Hey mom
02:37Oh, hey my sweet angels give me that baby. How are you doing? I'm fine
02:44Aunt Carol? She's processing
02:47Nothing to process your daddy has chosen another woman to love and to cherish and do nasty filthy things with
02:55I will just have to carry on and go back to Weight Watchers
02:59Processing
03:00Mom you don't have to be strong. I can't help it. I'm from Fermi
03:05People we're built for lifting and hauling
03:08I will meet this unexpected turn of events with grace and dignity and alcohol again. That's you
03:15I do need one favor
03:17Anything
03:19Your son's name bill jr. Is problematic
03:23It's on his birth certificate. He's been baptized. So we'll redunk him
03:29The name bill will never be said in this house again
03:31Oh Carol say something
03:34How about Rex? I love it
03:37No Rex we're not changing his name. Oh, he won't know the difference. Look at him. He looks like a Rex to me
03:44Grandmama loves her big boy Rex
03:46Leigh-eh
03:55Here you go I made it sugar-free because I know you're diabetic. Oh, thank you Leigh-eh
04:00I don't need you losing another foot
04:01I don't know how long I keep this just breathe I'm having dark thoughts Carol that's understandable
04:10I keep imagining Bill and this other woman and I'm standing over and over until my arm gets tired
04:14oh hey Sylvie cute dress and there's blood everywhere and I'm laughing well how could you
04:21not oh no just remember your son turned out good hey mom that's what you wear to charge
04:29that would have changed but I haven't been home yet where on earth have you been I'm not sure I
04:35think it was like a blue house where's dad well he woke up with a little tickle in his throat
04:41feeling a little clammy and I thought with his history of strength hang on they found my car
04:45okay at some point you got to tell her about you and Bill yeah but not here and I'm certainly
04:52gonna wait until she's sober so at family day at Betty Ford oh Lord hey Mary how you doing doll oh
05:01you know me basking in the sunshine of our Savior working on a melanoma good for you
05:07wasn't it a beautiful service it truly was and it is nice to have you back Carol I was so sorry to
05:15hear about your marriage we were all rooting for you in that little Italian feller he's from New
05:20Hampshire still a Catholic can I get you some jello salad oh thank you so where's bill today
05:28so working sick of working well honey I tell you if my husband traveled as much as bill does well I'd
05:35be up all night with runaway thoughts your husband's dead but I know where he is
05:41Lord I hate that woman it's like she's got my phone tapped her new teeth look good though they do
05:55you gonna tell mama and daddy absolutely not it'll break their little hearts you can't keep it a secret
06:05watch me here you go mom and daddy oh thank you look at you two y'all are just the cutest couple Walter
06:15died Walter down the block well he's not down the block anymore he's in the sweet arms of Jesus I
06:23never liked him he was a little handsy we don't speak ill of the dead but yes he was in my day we'd walk a
06:32pervert deep into the woods and come back alone where's bill um mails working mama on Sunday no rest
06:42for the wicked no he promised that he was going to build us one of those walk-in bath tubs with a
06:50little door and a seat like on TV sit in the shower day I do that I'm walking myself into the woods
06:57so when can Bill get started I don't know but if he said he build it then he will he's a good man
07:07Leanne you're lucky to have him sure am salt of the earth yeah salt God love him yeah God love him
07:17menopause I might need to find a new church please you've been a good Christian your whole life
07:37you're entitled to a small psychotic break during fellowship where are you going to check on dad
07:43whoa whoa whoa come back we've got to talk what I do now it's not you honey it's not me either
07:50I just drink on the weekends
07:55see it
07:59your daddy's not sick but there is something wrong with him
08:08I don't know how to tell you this other than just tell you your father has left me for another woman
08:17oh my gosh mom I know I'm in shock yeah so what is she like young and hot
08:25I don't really know but one would assume
08:30this explains everything what why I am the way I am okay what am you
08:41hello I'm a child of divorce
08:47sweetie this just happened yesterday
08:51did it or has it been going on my whole life
08:58no idea what happens now I have to choose between you and dad
09:05of course not I would never ask that of you but if you do want to choose good over evil I'm here for
09:12you it's not that simple mom there's two sides there's always two sides there's one side
09:22it's my side it's the side that took you to get fitted for a diaphragm
09:28oh
09:28wow I blame myself for that I took a buttload of dexatrim before I knew I was pregnant with her
09:38yeah that could do it and I kept wondering why I wasn't losing weight
09:44can't believe I'm gonna be a divorcee
09:54nothing to be ashamed of I'm one
09:56what's that look
09:59you can't compare our situations
10:03you married Boris because he had a Camaro
10:05and Alex so his dying little mama wouldn't know he was gay
10:10she knew she left him her pearls
10:14point is I was married to my college sweetheart for 33 years
10:21we had a successful business together
10:24we raised two wonderful children
10:26we have a beautiful grandbaby
10:28so
10:28so I win
10:30and now I'm looking to be alone for the rest of my life
10:36oh don't be ridiculous you'll find someone
10:39are you crazy I'm not gonna date
10:41why not
10:42you think I'm gonna crawl into a stranger's bed and let him see all this
10:47please get a juice cleanse and a spray tan and you're open for business
10:51you don't understand even if this was all tight and tawny
10:56up here the idea of being with another man is unthinkable
11:00it turns my stomach
11:01what if it was Tim McGraw
11:04I guess we could make out on his bus and see what happens
11:09attagirl I'll keep his bass player busy
11:12if only we had hormones
11:16here you go daddy
11:24thank you
11:25I'll tell you Walter died
11:32you did
11:34did I tell you how
11:35no
11:35reading on the toilet
11:38it's a silent killer
11:40that's why I keep the door open
11:43thinkin' ahead smart
11:47how you doin' on money
11:52I'm fine
11:53of course you are
11:54you ain't got no children
11:55I swear I will never make my children bathe me
12:01carol ain't got no children
12:03yes daddy thank you
12:05it was your turn
12:06I know
12:07I just wish we could put a snorkel in her mouth and run her through a car watch
12:11you know you wouldn't have to help her if Bill gets started on that walk-in tub he promised
12:17um he was just here the other day
12:20taking measurements
12:21isn't that right carol
12:22he was
12:23he was
12:24he was
12:24Bill was here
12:27oh daddy
12:28you have a nice bath mama
12:32uh-huh
12:33what you doin'
12:38taking this potato salad over to Walter's widow
12:41don't you think you wanna put some clothes on first
12:44she's just down the road
12:46are we just gonna watch this happen
12:51all right she'll find her way back she always does
12:55did I tell you Walter died?
13:00you did
13:01did I tell you how?
13:03brace yourself
13:04I tell you Walter died
13:13stop it
13:15you have got to be kidding me
13:20what are you doing here?
13:22I just came to get a few of my things
13:24you son of a bitch
13:25I always knew you couldn't be trusted
13:27what are you talking about?
13:29I'm the one you called when you had that trouble in Mexico
13:31what's this now?
13:34don't listen to him
13:35he's a proven liar
13:36okay thank you for your help
13:39but I got this
13:40go
13:41no I mean I've got this by myself
13:43what do you want me to do?
13:46I don't know
13:46take a walk around the block
13:48it was a destination wedding
13:51and I was framed
13:52so what?
13:57you were hoping to sneak in and out of here
13:59without having to face me?
14:01that was the idea yeah
14:02who ends a 33 year marriage with an email?
14:07can we not do this now?
14:09oh I'm sorry
14:09is this inconvenient for you?
14:11tell me when would be a good time?
14:14tomorrow
14:14ow
14:15who are you?
14:17talk to me
14:18I'm the same guy I've always been
14:20just
14:20tired of being miserable
14:23you were miserable?
14:25did you ever think to tell me you were miserable?
14:28come on Leanne
14:29you and I haven't touched each other in years
14:31we're more roommates than anything else
14:33so this is all about you getting touched?
14:35no
14:36it's all about me being happy
14:38and I found someone who makes me happy
14:40you found somebody that makes you happy?
14:44yes I did
14:45ow
14:47oh darn it
14:48now I'm happy
14:49I'm just over in Clarksville
14:53I can still be around for all the important stuff
14:56I thought I was the important stuff
15:03I'm so sorry
15:15I keep thinking this is all a bad dream and I'm gonna wake up
15:19you're gonna get through this
15:21no I won't
15:22yes you will and you'll be stronger and better for it
15:25what else you got?
15:28I don't know
15:29don't swim after a big meal?
15:32I love you
15:33stop talking
15:34you want me to stay the night?
15:37thank you but I can manage
15:38if you'll just help me make up this couch
15:40why?
15:42I can't sleep in that bedroom
15:43seriously?
15:45we made a baby on that bed
15:46you never did it on the couch?
15:50oh yeah
15:50technically it wasn't this couch
15:56it was the green chenille with the dimples
15:58the one you gave to me
15:59yeah but I flipped the cushions
16:02oh
16:03you can do this
16:11see you tomorrow
16:13yeah see ya
16:16good night
16:28love you
16:29love you too
16:30carol
16:49come back
16:51thank you
16:58oh you'd do it for me
17:00I would
17:00if you won't I can snore and fart so you think he's still here
17:03very considerate
17:05but no
17:06good night
17:08good night
17:10you know what
17:15there is one thing you could do
17:18good night
17:20good night
17:21you know what
17:23I'm sorry
17:25yes
17:27good night
17:28and I'm sorry
17:29good night
17:29you know why
17:30it's going
17:31impressive
17:32no
17:32not
17:33no
17:33good night
17:33at the吧
17:35the eve
17:37jump
17:38I know
17:39this town
17:40of God
17:41is
17:43the email
17:43this town
17:44is
17:45season
17:46the

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