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00:00Are you serious?
00:02Yeah.
00:03Yeah, I thought this might actually be some good news.
00:09May I owe you an explanation?
00:12Allison!
00:14Jason!
00:15Get an ambulance!
00:16How dare you go around saying things about my son.
00:19Your whole family owes me.
00:22You fucking owe me.
00:24I know, it wasn't my fault.
00:27I left that night.
00:30No!
00:36God, Daniel.
00:38How did you want this to play out?
00:40I don't know, I didn't think, obviously.
00:42What if this life had been us?
00:44Who the fuck are you?
00:45Nothing happened.
00:47You say so.
00:49It was really good to see you again.
00:52I don't want to run from the past anymore, Dan.
01:00Oh my God.
01:02Jangan0000
01:08You're a detective-ana producerade.
01:09Look what else has he been looking for?
01:10Like a cat that's playing with a ball of twine
01:14That you call my heart
01:17Oh, but baby, is it so hard
01:20To cover two apart?
01:22And so slowly you unwind me
01:26Until I fall apart
01:29I'm only living for the hour
01:38That I see your face
01:41And when that happens
01:43I don't want to be no other place
01:47Until we get to life
01:52When will she be back?
02:02She's not coming back
02:04She didn't say anything about leaving
02:10She talked to you about it, right?
02:16She left me now
02:17None of this makes sense
02:23I did something happen
02:26You don't just up and leave home
02:29At 17, Peter
02:30Look
02:33Whenever she's settled
02:36I'm sure she'll be in touch
02:39How are you so calm?
02:44Because I can guarantee you
02:45Wherever she is now
02:50She's happier than she were here
02:54I got her a birthday present
03:05Who are you?
03:10He's just leaving
03:11I'm Alison's boyfriend
03:12Yeah?
03:16So she left you and all
03:18Don't worry too much about it
03:21She would probably shagging
03:23A few lads
03:24Fucking bitch
03:26Stop it
03:27Thought too much of her sin
03:28She'll say in the real world
03:31She'll get her comeuppance
03:32Ungrateful cow
03:35And this one
03:37Off to the army
03:38You give them everything
03:42And they're happy to just leave you on your own
03:46Selfish brats
03:48She'll get you on your own
04:18And they're happy to just leave you on your own
04:48Dear Daniel
05:05You've probably already worked out from the postmark
05:09I'm an island
05:11It's really cool here
05:13There's a great music scene
05:15You'd love it
05:16I miss you
05:18And I'm so sorry
05:19I didn't come see you before I left
05:20Hi Mark
05:27That's fine
05:27Hiya
05:30Can I help you?
05:33Yeah
05:34Just three pints please
05:36And just join us for a drink
05:37Yeah
05:37Last mile for us though
05:39Give her a break
05:46We're just messing around
05:47I'll get these yeah
05:50Really?
05:51Yeah
05:52Thanks
05:53Bye
05:54Hey dickheads
05:58Can I buy your drink
06:03Can I buy your drink to say sorry?
06:04No
06:05Thank you
06:05I'm working
06:06That's not an Irish accent
06:09Are you from England?
06:14I'm busy
06:15No worries
06:17I'm staying in some digs near here
06:20Can I see you about?
06:25I'm Michael
06:26By the way
06:27Nice to meet you Michael
06:29I know he loves me
06:41But sometimes it just feels suffocating
06:49He's used to being in control
06:59But that's your job
07:01Right?
07:03To be in control
07:05But you can't
07:06You can't control another person
07:08I mean he
07:10You tracked my phone
07:12You followed me
07:14Can you explain your thinking behind that Michael?
07:18Oh look
07:19I don't think it's that unusual
07:20To have a family tracking plan on iPhones
07:22I know a lot of people who do that
07:25But you didn't tell Alison or Stella
07:28That you had that plan
07:29You do accept that Alison is allowed her privacy
07:35Of course I do
07:39But Alison is so
07:44You're so in yourself
07:50That sometimes I just feel like I'm trying to find you
07:53And if that's suffocating
07:56Yeah I'm sorry
07:59Do you feel like you'd shut yourself off
08:03To Michael, Alison?
08:08No
08:09Maybe I'm
08:14Not consciously
08:17But there's some stuff that he doesn't ask about
08:24I mean you've never even asked about my past
08:27You don't want to talk about that
08:29But why do you just accept that?
08:35So I mean the suffocating you or I'm giving you too much space
08:38It's like, which is it?
08:40There's work here
08:41But there's also love
08:43I can see that
08:45There we go
08:55How's Alex getting on?
09:01Oh, he's good
09:02He is planning to go to the Highlands with his mate for half term
09:07Yeah
09:07I do not know how much studying he's doing
09:10That sounds familiar, doesn't it?
09:12But he is happy
09:14Married my remits when Dan moved out
09:18I was not
09:19Yes, you were
09:20Not as bad as you
09:21Stuck in that shed all day with your pigeons
09:22That's not true
09:23He cried, you know
09:25You did?
09:27Right, Mum, go check the oven
09:29Not in mind, eh?
09:32No
09:32Got to go on myself
09:34Have a wazz
09:35Bill
09:36See you later
09:36Watch it
09:38Mind your rate
09:59I wasn't expecting you back from America so soon
10:13You're meant to be there for a few weeks
10:14Yeah, even longer
10:15I just had to come back and sort some stuff out
10:19Is everything okay?
10:28No
10:28Not really
10:31Well, I see
10:32You must have had that
10:38With Bill
10:39Right?
10:41Weren't there moments where you were
10:43Ready to just give up?
10:46I don't understand
10:47I get that two people don't change at the same time
10:52But
10:52What if you haven't changed?
10:56What if you're just not
10:57On the same page anymore?
11:04I'm lost, love
11:05It's okay
11:08It doesn't matter
11:09Well
11:14Marriages are hard, aren't they?
11:20Times would happily strangle Bill
11:21But
11:21Well, all that matters is
11:25That you're honest with one another
11:28And
11:28I'm sure everything will be fine, love
11:31I don't think so
11:33But
11:36I know
11:36I don't know
11:37What if you are
11:38You can't
11:39I don't know
11:39You can't
11:40I don't know
11:41I don't know
11:41I don't know
11:42You can't
11:43But
11:43Well, it's okay
11:43I don't know
11:44You can't
11:44You can't
11:45All right, Mama.
12:03See you later.
12:04Bye.
12:15Hey.
12:29Hey.
12:30Just checking in.
12:33How's counseling?
12:38How did you know we're at the counselors?
12:40I'm not a complete moron.
12:41Well, you're not a moron at all.
12:43You know, sometimes, sometimes you just need some help with your problems.
12:53That's all.
12:54Dad and I love you very much.
12:55You know that, don't you?
12:57This has got nothing to do with you or Thea.
13:03But all this kicked off when all that stuff happened.
13:08No, I didn't, darling.
13:10I promise.
13:11This is our own stuff.
13:13Are we going to keep doing this?
13:28Avoiding each other?
13:29I think I'm just afraid of what's going to come out when we start talking.
13:44She lives in Sydney, this author that you pretended you didn't know.
14:01There are no direct flies to New Zealand, Cal.
14:11There is so little we have in common anymore, Dan, but the inability to lie well is still true for the both of us.
14:19Did you go there to see her?
14:21Look, look, it was a stopover on that route to see Jack Leonard.
14:32And, yes, I did see her on our own Sydney.
14:37Well, it's not like you think.
14:41Right when we were kids, we were together, and she left Sheffield suddenly, and I just wanted to know why, not right?
14:49Why didn't you tell me that?
14:51Why didn't you tell me that?
14:54You could have.
14:55I don't know.
14:56I don't know.
14:58I don't know.
14:58You're right.
14:59I should have been straight with you from the start.
15:02I should have been, but, you know, we've been going through this weird space, and I just felt like this was my thing.
15:07The only thing I needed to once is, honestly, Cal, we're no more than that.
15:14We've been together for decades.
15:18You've never even mentioned her.
15:22Why not?
15:35I'm sorry, Cal.
15:37I'm sorry, but you were so fucking boring at the moment.
15:47Come on, one party.
15:48I need a wingman.
15:49You don't need a wingman.
15:51Right, there's that bird from that convent school.
15:53Rose Summer.
15:54I don't know.
15:55I need to think I'm nice and respectable.
15:57I'm definitely not helping with that.
15:59See?
15:59Dull.
16:01Come on.
16:03Here, isn't that?
16:05Peter.
16:06Peter!
16:07I didn't know you were back.
16:11Has there been any words from Al?
16:13Is she okay?
16:14Look, mate, I have to get on.
16:15He's not stopped pining for her.
16:16For the fuck's sake.
16:17What's fucking wrong with your family?
16:19Eh?
16:20Why don't you tell me where she is?
16:23My mum's died.
16:27Jesus.
16:28I'm sorry.
16:30I'm sorry.
16:35Let's just leave her.
16:36Come on.
16:37Okay.
16:44Let me get her for you.
16:45Okay.
16:45Let me get her for you.
16:49Hello.
16:58Hello.
16:59Hiya, Al.
17:00Peter.
17:03Listen, er...
17:04I've got bad news.
17:07What's wrong?
17:08It's...
17:09It's mum.
17:09She, er...
17:13She died.
17:19She fell down the stairs.
17:27When...
17:27When's the funeral?
17:28Tuesday.
17:37So, I'm going to owe you the money for your flights.
17:41But if you don't think you can do it alone,
17:44I'll...
17:45I'll come over and get you.
17:48Why is it so soon?
17:50Can't we wait a week?
17:54She was seeing that prick Baxter again.
17:56He was weird when she died.
18:00He'd already been under the funeral directors.
18:06Baxter didn't tell me for two, four days she were dead.
18:11And he's gone around now,
18:12working like the chief mourner.
18:18I can't.
18:21I can't come home.
18:22I can't come home.
18:24What are you talking about?
18:26I'll pay you, Al.
18:27You don't have to worry about it.
18:28I'm not coming back.
18:29Look,
18:30I know you're upset.
18:31I understand.
18:33But she was our mum.
18:35Now listen,
18:36you have to do this.
18:37Even if you're angry with her.
18:40Yeah?
18:42Trust me.
18:45You'll regret it.
18:47You fell down the fucking stairs while she was drunk.
18:50I'm not going to a funeral.
18:51You're positive.
19:13Like a hundred percent.
19:14You were so reluctant before.
19:15What happened?
19:16Yeah, I just...
19:17I just made up my mind.
19:21Babe, I could kiss you.
19:22This is great news.
19:23I'm going to get on to the PR company,
19:25confirm all the interviews,
19:27and we're going to sort you out some lovely hotels.
19:29Okay.
19:29And will it just be you,
19:33or you're coming with Michael?
19:39Can I get back to you on that?
19:42Sure.
19:43Speak of the devil.
19:48Michael.
20:01Michael, I...
20:02I said I wanted to talk about something important.
20:05I know, I know.
20:06I just wanted to...
20:08do something nice for you.
20:10It's still allowed, isn't it?
20:11Some bubbles.
20:12You may recognise this.
20:15Tasmania.
20:16Yeah, Tasmania favourite.
20:19Oh!
20:20That's great.
20:22Here we go.
20:23Ladies first.
20:25You get a nice big pour.
20:28Here we go.
20:28Thanks.
20:30Okay.
20:31And on a mask.
20:35There we go.
20:37Cheers, my love.
20:38Cheers.
20:38Cheers.
20:41Hmm.
20:42Please, please.
20:43Yeah.
20:47Need a bit more of this, huh?
20:50Being a couple.
20:52Hmm.
20:54I love you.
20:58I know.
20:59So you told Cass that, uh, you're doing the tour?
21:08Yes, I did.
21:10I was thinking.
21:12I am due a lot of leave.
21:17What if I came with you?
21:18That's what I wanted to talk about.
21:22Oh, really?
21:24You thought that too?
21:31No.
21:33Actually, I thought it might be a good idea for us to have some time apart.
21:36What if I came with you now?
21:42Alison.
21:45I want to do this on my own, Michael.
21:51What about Thea?
21:53And Stella, with everything she's been through?
21:57Stella's stronger than you think.
21:58It really doesn't matter how hard I try, does it?
22:16You've changed.
22:21Yes.
22:24I have.
22:25I have.
22:28Stephen, you have to stop ringing me.
22:39I have to go.
22:42Who was that?
22:43Ah, a telemarketer.
22:45Did you get the steaks?
22:47I did.
22:48I did.
22:49Also got us a lovely bottle of red,
22:52so I thought we could, you know, put these on and...
22:54try and have a nice night in.
22:58That is...
23:02nice.
23:19Cut your phone!
23:20She was by myself in a helpless way to you
23:31I love you
23:37I love you
23:42I love you
23:48I love you
23:54I love you
23:57Is there something you need to tell me?
24:27Are you sure you don't want something to eat?
24:33No, no, I'm fine, I'm alright.
24:36Well, you can stay here as long as you like, son, you know that.
24:39But you are going to have to sort it out eventually.
24:42Yeah, yeah, well...
24:44No, not now.
24:51Mum, did I ever get any letters?
24:54What?
24:56It's just Alison said that she sent me letters.
25:00Did they come here or are you now?
25:05Did you put them up for me or something?
25:10Mum?
25:12Oh, it was so long ago now, all of that.
25:19Mum, what did you do?
25:25You're my son.
25:29Wouldn't you do hope to protect your Alex?
25:34No, tell me that you didn't do that.
25:39I'm sorry, Dan.
25:43I did what I thought were best.
25:45She had hold on you, that girl, and...
25:48Well, she broke your heart, I knew she would.
25:50I were right.
25:52It was better she had just gone.
25:55No, no, no, you had no right.
25:57Do you understand me?
25:58You had no right to do that.
26:00You couldn't even get to imagine what she'd gone through.
26:02I realise that now.
26:03I've even realised it at the time, but...
26:12I was scared of losing you.
26:15Where were they?
26:16Where were they?
26:17Did you keep them?
26:18Oh, Mum.
26:23They would've made everything different.
26:25Like...
26:26My whole life.
26:27You were only kids.
26:29I didn't think...
26:30Yeah, you didn't think, did you?
26:32Dan!
26:33You didn't think!
26:34You didn't think!
26:35I'm...
26:36My whole life!
26:37Oh, Dan, I'm sorry.
26:39Don't go home.
26:55Alright.
26:57Let's see.
27:07Okay.
27:08I'll watch you.
27:11God, I'll see you later.
27:24I'll see you later.
27:26Okay?
27:27Jesus.
27:28Jesus.
27:29Jesus.
27:30Jesus.
27:31Jesus.
27:32Jesus.
27:53She ain't gone, man.
27:57No.
28:00She doesn't.
28:05I suppose it's...
28:08a bit of a way for her.
28:19Where is she, Peter?
28:24Ireland.
28:27She's working in a bar in Dublin.
28:32Ireland?
28:33Yeah.
28:39Right.
28:41I have to get on, mate.
28:43I have my savings and I'm selling all my records.
28:54You've been working for a long time on that American trip, son.
28:56But I'm worried over now.
28:57The flights are expensive and even if they stay in a hostel...
29:00I'll lend you a few, Bob.
29:01You won't be short.
29:02You will?
29:03Yeah.
29:04You believe she's worth it and so do I.
29:07You believe she's worth it and so do I.
29:10Your mum will have to wait for a microwave, mind.
29:13Hey, hey, hey, hey.
29:14Cheers, brother.
29:16It's all right.
29:18Appreciate you.
29:19Go get her.
29:20Have you heard from your brother?
29:30Yeah.
29:32He wants me to go home.
29:33What's your choice, Alison?
29:34I'm sure Peter loves you, but you said it yourself.
29:35He's got to live his life.
29:36Because if you do go back there, he's going to feel like he needs to look after you, isn't
29:49he?
29:50You know what I mean?
29:53I don't know.
29:56Like, we always looked out for each other, but now, I mean, it's not like this is my long-term
30:01plan.
30:03I love it, but I don't even know anybody here.
30:06You're the first friend I've made and you're going back to Australia.
30:09Yeah, the greatest country on earth.
30:16You're beautiful when you do that.
30:20You should smile just like that on our wedding day.
30:28You barely know me.
30:30I know you.
30:31You're just like me.
30:33You traveled over here on your own.
30:35Looking to see the world.
30:37You're fun, Alison Connor.
30:43Hey there, you with your sad face,
30:46I've been thinking.
30:47Hear me out.
30:48My parents are really well connected.
30:49My dad's got me this internship at this hospital in Sydney.
30:50Well, I reckon he could get you something and you would love Australia. I'll look after you there. Like, it is pretty far from Sheffield, but it would be a great adventure.
31:01I don't know if it feels huge.
31:02Yeah, and what about who's that woman you've been writing to? Is it Sheila? Yeah. Wouldn't it be good to see her?
31:07Be with your dad.
31:09Hear me out.
31:10I see my dad.
31:12They're a little baby.
31:13Don't know her.
31:14That's right.
31:15They'll be there.
31:16I think it's a little baby.
31:17They can feel like she's doing a lot with you.
31:18But I'm not alone.
31:19But you don't love Australia.
31:20I'll look after you there.
31:21Like it is pretty far from Sheffield, brother.
31:22It would be a great adventure.
32:25You're welcome.
32:35Thank you, thank you.
32:36Thank you very much.
32:38Oh, so I'm delighted to hear from you.
32:42Are you in Ireland?
32:44Pretty day about, do you, eh? Travelling already?
32:47Yeah, I guess I got the bug.
32:49That's why I'm ringing, really.
32:52I've... Well, I've met somebody,
32:54and he's Australian, and he's suggested...
32:58No. Are you coming out here?
33:01Would that be weird?
33:03Weird? Look, I'm getting a spare room, ready as we speak.
33:08It was just one night.
33:16I was drunk and really upset about us.
33:19And this work colleague of yours,
33:21he offered you his penis to cry on, did he?
33:23It's not quite the same, is it?
33:25No, it's not the same, Cass.
33:26I made a mistake. I didn't fly halfway.
33:29I didn't fly halfway around the world to meet an ex
33:31that you never told me about.
33:32A woman that you seemingly not been able to get over
33:34for the past 20-odd fucking years.
33:38I'm... Look, I'm... I'm sorry.
33:44I think we just need to face up to it.
33:46We've grown apart, Dan.
33:49I don't know, I guess when Alex was there,
33:52he was something that we were both focusing on,
33:54but now, who are we?
33:56I mean, when was the last time we even had sex?
33:59I don't mean plain, vanilla lights off, sex.
34:03I mean, actual, proper fucker...
34:05That's why you went with him, was it?
34:07Proper, lusty, fucking sex.
34:09What is me? Jesus Christ.
34:11Oh, come on. I'm sorry.
34:24Right, babe, I don't want it to be like this.
34:27Okay?
34:29I know you, Dan.
34:34I'm not letting you use this as your get-up clause.
34:38You're not as angry as your acting.
34:42Your head is somewhere else.
34:44It's on her.
34:48It's on her.
34:53Look, it doesn't matter who's done what,
34:55who's right or wrong.
34:59I wanted something different, too.
35:02That's why I suggested the States.
35:03That's why I...
35:08did what I did.
35:11If we'd been happy,
35:13it would never even have entered my mind.
35:16But it meant something to you when you went to Australia.
35:21And that's just facts.
35:30So...
35:32So what are you saying?
35:33I think you know what I'm saying.
35:41I love you, Dan.
35:44I know you love me, too, but...
35:49We're not in love anymore.
35:57I'm not saying it doesn't hurt.
36:00But we don't have to settle for this.
36:05Yeah, it's just...
36:08I think I'm just, you know,
36:09I just don't want to lose you, Kat.
36:12You know, and I don't want to lose Alex.
36:13And, you know, and I don't want to lose my life.
36:16No, you're not going to lose your life.
36:18No, you're not going to lose your life.
36:19Sorry.
36:20Come on.
36:25We're family.
36:27Right, Kat?
36:30We always agreed we would be on the same team.
36:38Um, we'd make plans together.
36:41You know, decide things together.
36:43You agreed.
36:44You made the decisions.
36:45You just let me think I was making them, too.
36:48Excuse me?
36:51It's about control.
36:55I see that now.
36:56What are you talking about?
36:59Michael has a way of doing things where he talks to you
37:01as though you're already on the same page.
37:03Like, recently I said I had to talk to him
37:05about something important,
37:07and he ambushed me with champagne and crudités,
37:11so I'd be on the back foot.
37:12Sorry, I forgot.
37:13My wife doesn't like romance.
37:15He's a wing clipper.
37:16He shuts me down.
37:17Are you kidding me?
37:18I practically had to beg you to come here for a second session
37:21so that we could talk.
37:22If anything, you're shutting me down.
37:24Michael doesn't make me do anything,
37:27and yet I always seem to end up doing exactly as he pleases.
37:31Like with Sheffield, for instance,
37:32I should have gone back to resolve things,
37:34but he was too afraid that he'd lose me.
37:36How do you come out with the stupidest things sometimes?
37:39Maybe we need to take a short break.
37:41I'm sorry.
37:42This was his idea.
37:44I should have been honest from the start.
37:48I need a break from this marriage.
37:56I'm done.
37:58Why don't you just be honest with us, Alison?
38:00This isn't about me.
38:02It's the old boyfriend.
38:05The one you fucked the last time you abandoned your family.
38:11Fuck off, Michael.
38:18I love you.
38:40I love you.
38:40I love you, Melissa.
38:42I love you.
38:43What do you do?
38:52Come here.
38:56I'm out of my head.
39:04I'm out of my head.
39:07Come here.
39:12I bet you miss home comforts like they say
39:17Oh, well, Sheila's always getting stuff sent over, thank you
39:21She loves serving me heart attacks on a plate
39:24Of course, Sheila, how is she?
39:29She's, well, she's good, she's, um, cookie as anything
39:33But she was asking after you, actually
39:36I can't believe it
39:40Yeah, three whole weeks
39:42Well, some of it in London
39:45Oh, well, we'll come down and see you if you like, won't we, Peter?
39:49I'd love that
39:50Yeah
39:50Are you two okay if I nip out to work?
39:55Oh, yeah
39:56Yeah, we'll be fine, we'll be love
39:57Yeah, of course
39:58Lovely to meet you, Alison
39:59Oh, you too
40:00Oh
40:01Peter's always talking about you, I feel like I know you already
40:06Oh, I can see how happy you both are
40:08And I really hope that I get to know you more
40:11Yeah, of course
40:12See you later
40:15Take care
40:17Yeah, you too
40:18Peter is lovely
40:27I can't believe he is in uni now
40:38Ah, yes
40:39And Stella's almost ready to leave the nest
40:42You did well with them girls
40:48Thank you
40:52Well, Thea, she's never been any trouble
40:57But Stella, she's, um
41:00Well, Stella's Stella
41:02She's not without her problems
41:04You're Arthur
41:08Peter
41:15Peter
41:15I'm sorry
41:17I'm sorry
41:18My God
41:19What do you have to be sorry for?
41:21I'm sorry
41:23There shouldn't be more of a living
41:25No
41:26Oh, I wish
41:27I wish I had made you feel more welcome to come and visit
41:30I wish I'd
41:32I dealt with things differently back then
41:35You're here now, Alan
41:37That's all that matters
41:38What happened?
41:48Don't bring this all on now
41:49I don't know
41:58It's, um
42:01It's been building
42:03This tension between Michael and I
42:06And then
42:10Well, I had, um
42:13Had a blast from the past
42:16And
42:18And
42:20And it shook me
42:21What was a blast from the past?
42:26Oh, just
42:26Just somebody I used to know
42:28Wouldn't be called Daniel, would you?
42:37What makes you say that?
42:42Took him a long time to get over you
42:44And I figured
42:49Went looking for you that first time
42:51He'd try again
42:54What do you mean the first time?
43:01He was broken, I was
43:02And I told him he'd gone
43:05The next thing I heard
43:09He booked a ticket to Dublin
43:10And
43:11He was there for a few days
43:14He'd come back without you
43:15And
43:15And you never mentioned that
43:19For
43:19I don't know
43:21I just
43:22I wonder
43:28If he ever really got over you
43:30He followed me
43:33He never even replied to the letters
43:38He
43:38He never said anything
43:41He was a good life
43:45It's rare to love somebody that much so young
43:50Do you mind if I pop out for a little bit?
44:03Not at all
44:03I'll be back
44:04I'll still be here
44:06Beautiful dreamer
44:12Wake unto me
44:15Starlight and dew drops
44:18Are waiting for thee
44:22If misery walked
44:26It skips a break
44:30Your marriage is over
44:32Cry me a river
44:33Cry you a river?
44:35What, you been taking
44:35Counselor lessons or something?
44:37It's been coming, son
44:38That's all I'm saying
44:39It's no surprise, is it?
44:43I love you, Katri
44:44Don't get me wrong
44:45Because you were never really the one
44:48Bloody hell
44:50It looks like everybody knows more about me life than I do
44:52Dad, can I ask you something?
45:00Hmm?
45:02Did you know about the letters that Alistair wrote back then?
45:09And my mum chucked him in the bin before I could see him
45:11No, I did not
45:16Your mum's a wonder, son
45:22But she is prone to acting before she thinks
45:27What can I say?
45:31She didn't know I offered you a loan to go to Ireland
45:34It's a long time ago, put it behind you
45:36Seems like there's some things you can't move on from
45:44You know what my biggest regret is?
45:49So I just didn't fight for her
45:55Alison, I mean
46:00She had such a hard life
46:06And nobody fought for her
46:08You're looking down the barrel of a divorce
46:14And still thinking about your first love
46:16I should be telling you some of it
46:18Yeah, well, she's married now, isn't she?
46:24Happily
46:24Yeah
46:25I mean, to be honest, they were right, Swat
46:29It's too soon for all that
46:34I need time to, you know
46:35Be miserable?
46:36Yes, that'd be miserable
46:38Thank you
46:39Anyway, I'm drunk, are you?
46:44Not drunk enough
46:45Come on
46:47Let's go to a pub
46:49You can pine for the love of your life
46:51With a proper pint in front of you
46:53You can pine for the love of your life
47:23Sorry, Mom
47:27Sorry, Mom
47:27Don't push poker
47:28Sorry, Mom
47:29Just펫
47:30Stay
47:30Thank you
47:32You can marketplace
47:33Pull
47:33To grow
47:34As they speak
47:35Mhm
47:36Come on
47:37Oh
47:37Yeah
47:45Eric
47:46I know
47:48I don't think it's true
47:48You can
47:53I don't know
47:54God
47:54Slowly
47:54Sweet
49:05Is tea okay, Alison?
49:07Yeah, thanks.
49:11You've changed your hair.
49:13Yeah.
49:14Obviously the sun suits you.
49:16Oh, well.
49:16Took me a few years to adjust.
49:17You sound like one of them and all, don't you?
49:23Shall I pour it for you?
49:25Oh, yeah.
49:25Thanks.
49:26So, um, you're just, uh, back to promote your book?
49:37Yes.
49:38Milk?
49:39Please.
49:40Tell me when.
49:42Ah, that's perfect.
49:43Sugar.
49:44Yeah.
49:44And you're married.
49:51I am.
49:52I am.
49:53You've got kids.
49:54I have two.
49:55I have two girls.
49:56Oh?
49:56Yeah.
49:57Been busy.
49:57I have been busy, yeah.
49:59It is crazy you remember it now with Daniel after all this time.
50:11Well, he meant a lot to me.
50:16You were so young.
50:17How old were you and Bill when you got together?
50:26Well, that were different times, weren't it?
50:31Just deaf kids.
50:38I'm staying with my brother, Peter.
50:40How?
50:41He told me that, uh, Daniel came looking for me after I'd left.
50:47I think when, you know, when you have kids, you just, you want to do anything to protect them.
51:11You want them to have the very best of things.
51:17Can I just say, Alison,
51:30I am so very sorry.
51:37I am about all of it.
51:40There were problems back then.
51:51You were being a good mom.
51:52But I'd very much like to talk to Daniel now.
52:04Just saying, I know things, son.
52:23I know, Dad.
52:24You're always just saying.
52:26You're one shot at life.
52:27Yeah, okay, yeah, thank you.
52:28Let me finish.
52:30You pay made a mess of things when you were kids.
52:33I'm not saying either of you wasted your life.
52:36You made the best of it.
52:38But it hasn't worked out.
52:39Oh, well, thanks for that, Dad.
52:43You're not kids anymore, that's what I mean.
52:48It's like my pigeons.
52:50We all make our way home eventually.
52:54It's just taken you longer.
53:00She's your home, son.
53:02I was just going to say, I booked somewhere for dinner.
53:24We can eat in if you need a bit more time.
53:26Oh, yeah, that'd be great.
53:31I just have something to do first.
53:36Or not.
53:37I can't decide.
53:39Where are you?
53:41I'm standing out in front of a pub,
53:45deliberating whether or not to go in.
53:47Oh, man.
53:48You know, if you're off to drink,
53:49it's a whole good idea to go to a pub.
53:52Christ, no, I'm not like a mom.
53:56No, there's just somebody inside I want to talk to.
54:02Somebody?
54:06Daniel.
54:08Ah, pleasure.
54:09What are you going then?
54:12Because I think he might be with his wife.
54:15And I've got nowhere to check,
54:17because he, ah,
54:19I think he blocked my phone number.
54:22Ah, there's a lot to unpack there.
54:25Can I give you some advice?
54:28Yeah, I wish you would.
54:32Life's too short, I have regrets.
54:34And love is worth fighting for.
54:37Ha.
54:38You old poet.
54:40Don't lie on the way.
54:43Bye, love.
54:43Dad, dad, dad, dad,
55:12Don't lie on the way.
55:34Bye, love.
55:35Sorry.
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54:34
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