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Transcript

00:00:00oh my god there are so many hot sanders now i'm not nearly tipsy enough i take it i'm pretty beat

00:00:12i think i'm gonna head on no sis don't be a scrooge some of us have to work tomorrow

00:00:17i am working my ass off to make sure you have a fun time tonight what is the point of living in

00:00:23the sexiest city in the world if we're not gonna take full advantage i take advantage

00:00:26the night screenings of harry potter does not count what if you meet your soulmate tonight

00:00:32i promise you my soulmate is not out at 2 a.m dressed up as santa claus

00:00:36oh my god he is so hot he's totally checking you out probably because i look ridiculous

00:00:47every santa needs a reindeer to ride and i am not stopping until i get you laid so come on let's go

00:00:56oh my god santa haughty is full on staring at you

00:01:10he probably just thinks i'm someone else yeah his soulmate you know i don't believe in soulmates

00:01:20okay i know you haven't dated since don't see his name since he who shall not be named but mia

00:01:27college was a lifetime ago and i know he broke your heart so i say this with love

00:01:31you need to get the hell over it i am over it i'm just too busy to date right now work is crazy

00:01:38it's the busy season at the library you know you can't date a buck right a girl can dream

00:01:44okay forget soulmate you just need to have fun and get laid i bet sam is great in bed what

00:01:51hi ladies great outfits you knew rudolph the red-nosed reindeer could be so sexy

00:01:58sexy i look like i belong to the zoo

00:02:02well i'm a fan this is my sister mia she's totally single

00:02:06well nice to meet you mia i'm deplin isn't that the name of the prince i hear they're in town

00:02:13on some diplomacy tour you know rich people stuff another round yeah

00:02:18cheers

00:02:36so do you come here often you've got to be kidding me

00:03:00So, do you come here often?

00:03:05You've got to be kidding me.

00:03:07What?

00:03:07Just conversation.

00:03:09Exotic accent and a couple free drinks normally work for you?

00:03:13You tell me.

00:03:14Absolutely not.

00:03:15Yeah, right.

00:03:16I bet you're secretly planning our wedding in your head right now.

00:03:20More like our divorce.

00:03:22Then I bet a lawyer.

00:03:24So judging by your accent, I'm assuming you're not from here?

00:03:28No, just visiting.

00:03:30What are you doing in town?

00:03:32Just fabulous things.

00:03:35Sounds fascinating.

00:03:36Work stuff's boring.

00:03:38It's more interesting things to talk about, such as your beautiful brown eyes.

00:03:43You're going to have to do way better than that.

00:03:47Am I?

00:03:48Wow, cocky.

00:03:50I just know what I want.

00:03:51Just go for it, Mia.

00:04:05Can't stop when your heart is on the line.

00:04:10Can't stop, no.

00:04:13Can't stop all the night.

00:04:17Can't stop when your heart is on the line.

00:04:21It's automatic.

00:04:23Waking up beside you like it's a habit.

00:04:28Too long what would happen.

00:04:33Oh, yeah.

00:04:34You do this every time.

00:04:36It's just so classic.

00:04:39Still don't know why we let go.

00:04:42I'm trying to find a little closure.

00:04:44I guess we just need some time.

00:04:47And if you want to come on over.

00:04:49Well, baby, that's alright.

00:04:52But you hate me if I put you closer.

00:04:54If only for a night or night.

00:04:57Trying, baby, but I just can't forget you.

00:05:02Can't stop, no.

00:05:03Can't stop overnight.

00:05:07Can't stop when your heart is on the line.

00:05:12Can't stop, no.

00:05:13Can't stop overnight.

00:05:17You're coming home with me.

00:05:18Like hell I am.

00:05:20Come on.

00:05:21You want me.

00:05:23Bad.

00:05:24What an arrogant asshole.

00:05:28Jared?

00:05:29Let me know when you're done calling me names so I can call my car.

00:05:34Fine.

00:05:35Let's go.

00:05:36I love America.

00:05:57Oh, before we go any further I need to tell you something.

00:06:09Don't tell me you're married.

00:06:11I can't do that again.

00:06:12No, I just want you to know I'm not looking for anything serious.

00:06:16We can have fun right now, but afterwards I don't want to date you or even know you.

00:06:20It's a one-time thing to help me get back out there.

00:06:22I know.

00:06:23Oh, Mia.

00:06:24What?

00:06:25Might be my dream woman.

00:06:27Great.

00:06:27So let's agree to have mind-blowing sex and then never speak again.

00:06:31Yeah.

00:06:31Aw.

00:06:32You hit me with the H-E-Y.

00:06:49I'ma hit you with the H-Boy-Boy.

00:06:52You told me that I'm too closed off, but you know that I'm not involved with Playboys.

00:06:58I don't want to be your Play-Toy.

00:07:01Don't you know that I'm so much more than a centerfold?

00:07:06You hit me with the what you're doing.

00:07:10I'ma hit you with the nothing much.

00:07:13As if it's any of your business.

00:07:15What am I even doing though?

00:07:18You told me that you want to come through Play-Toy.

00:07:21I can't let you flip through my pages and hold me close like those Playboys.

00:07:29I don't want to be your Play-Toy.

00:07:32Don't you know that I'm so much more than a centerfold?

00:08:02Where is it?

00:08:19Well, good morning to you two.

00:08:21I can't find my bra and I'm late for work.

00:08:25Where do you work?

00:08:26The library.

00:08:27So what are you so stressed about?

00:08:29Is there a book emergency?

00:08:30Can you just shut up and help me find it?

00:08:33Can't do anything before 9am.

00:08:36Wow, thanks so much for your help.

00:08:37I'm just going to go.

00:08:38You going to get a coffee?

00:08:40I'd love one.

00:08:41Two creams, one sugar.

00:08:43Thanks doll.

00:08:45Seriously?

00:08:46Fine, I'll order in.

00:08:48Breakfast?

00:08:49You Americans love everything deep-fried, right?

00:08:51What are you doing?

00:08:54Being a gentleman.

00:08:55We had an agreement, remember?

00:08:57Yeah.

00:09:00Sorry, I was in a tat habit last night.

00:09:04Ah.

00:09:04How much weight are you?

00:09:06Oh my god, it's not that kind of agreement.

00:09:08My apologies.

00:09:14Wow.

00:09:15I had no idea you were such a slut.

00:09:17Didn't realize you were so uptight.

00:09:23Look, I just want to find my bra, go to work, and never, ever speak to you again.

00:09:29Yes, of course.

00:09:31Let's find that bra and get you out of my life forever.

00:09:33Who is that?

00:09:38It's probably my stepmom.

00:09:40Oh my god.

00:09:41You live with your parents?

00:09:43You really don't know who I am.

00:09:46Since when was Santa so cocky?

00:09:48Since when was Rudolph such a bitch?

00:09:51Wow.

00:09:55Where are you going?

00:09:55I would rather go bra-less than spend another suck-it with you.

00:10:01Finally, we agree on something.

00:10:21Good morning, your royal highness.

00:10:23Good morning, your royal highness.

00:10:25Well, good morning.

00:10:40It was until I had to deal with your latest shenanigans.

00:10:44I can't imagine what you mean.

00:10:45I was a good boy.

00:10:46In bed by nine.

00:10:48Really?

00:10:49With yet another girl?

00:10:50Of course not.

00:10:52Can you please pass me the bar?

00:10:53The maid found this when making up your room this morning.

00:10:59Well, that's my bra.

00:11:01I've been looking for it everywhere.

00:11:03It's really my color, don't you think?

00:11:05Now you see here, we didn't make this diplomacy trip ahead of your coronation so you could bed a different American every night.

00:11:13That is no way for the future king to behave.

00:11:16My apologies, your majesty.

00:11:19I'll be on my best behavior, starting now.

00:11:22Good.

00:11:23Because this trip isn't just about fostering goodwill between our nations.

00:11:27We're here on a mission.

00:11:29What are we doing?

00:11:30I'm afraid the palace is in dire need of some funds.

00:11:33We're broke?

00:11:34Hmm.

00:11:36Father left me a generous inheritance when he passed.

00:11:38For you personally, yes.

00:11:40But it takes a small fortune to run the palace every day.

00:11:43So what are we going to do?

00:11:46Not to worry, I have a plan.

00:11:48As always.

00:11:49It seems that we are to be guests of honor at the governor's winter masquerade ball tonight.

00:11:54Unfortunately, the governor is traveling on business, but his daughter Courtney will be there and she has his ear.

00:12:00Whatever she wants, he agrees to.

00:12:02I plan to tactfully ask her for a loan.

00:12:07Brilliant.

00:12:08How can I help?

00:12:09By not further embarrassing the crown.

00:12:11The governor is very conservative.

00:12:17He has very traditional values.

00:12:19If he hears about your wild antics running around with different women, there is no way he'll agree to the loan.

00:12:26Of course.

00:12:29I'll do my very best.

00:12:30You'd better.

00:12:32Or there won't be a crown for you to inherit.

00:12:34I'll do my very best.

00:12:41Get rid of this immediately.

00:13:00We've got a press conference at the plaza, a luncheon with the American Diplomats Association,

00:13:15a fundraiser for Doctors Without Borders, a private tour of the Guggenheim,

00:13:19front row at the Gucci show, and invitations to drinks with three different Kardashians.

00:13:25Also, your fan mail has just arrived.

00:13:33This is just from today.

00:13:40Shall I bring the car around?

00:13:42No, I think I'll walk.

00:13:44Walk?

00:13:45Are you feeling all right?

00:13:46Yes.

00:13:48I've never felt better.

00:13:50Hey, you fetch me that bra.

00:13:52I'll return it to its rightful owner.

00:13:54Sir, I could handle this myself.

00:13:57That sort of errand is a little beneath you.

00:14:01Trust me, I know.

00:14:02This is the last thing I want to do.

00:14:04But I'm afraid I might not have to handle this myself.

00:14:06It's a sensitive matter.

00:14:08It must be handled discreetly.

00:14:10Certainly, sir.

00:14:11I'll go fetch it for you.

00:14:13Perfect.

00:14:14Now tell me, Henry.

00:14:16Where does one find a...

00:14:19library?

00:14:39Bye, sequencing you.

00:15:01Bye, misschien.

00:15:02Bye, maybe.

00:15:04Bye.

00:15:06Bye.

00:15:07Bye.

00:15:08Bye.

00:15:09Where is he?

00:15:33Find it!

00:15:34Where'd he go?

00:15:35Back now.

00:15:39What the hell are you doing here?

00:15:50Come with me.

00:15:51There he is!

00:15:54There he is!

00:15:56I hate my paparazzi following you. Who are you?

00:16:01Just calm down.

00:16:03Oh, because telling a woman to calm down is always such a great idea.

00:16:07I think he went this way. Follow me.

00:16:13Hurry. You've got to get a shot.

00:16:16What the hell is wrong with you?

00:16:32It was just my last resort. Sorry.

00:16:34Good, because that didn't mean anything to me.

00:16:37Didn't mean anything to me more.

00:16:39You're a child.

00:16:41How the hell do I get out of here?

00:16:43Are you afraid you're going to learn something?

00:16:45Just show me the way out.

00:16:48Gladly.

00:17:00What were you doing in a library anyway?

00:17:03Just returning a book.

00:17:06Thanks.

00:17:07Yeah.

00:17:08Well.

00:17:09Goodbye forever, I suppose.

00:17:10Yeah.

00:17:11Well.

00:17:12Goodbye forever, I suppose.

00:17:15Yeah.

00:17:16I love you.

00:17:18Goodbye forever, I suppose.

00:17:23Goodbye forever, I suppose.

00:17:24Yeah.

00:17:25I love you.

00:17:26Goodbye forever, I suppose.

00:17:41Yeah.

00:17:43.

00:18:13How can you be so blatantly disrespectful?

00:18:17Well, that was fast.

00:18:20Didn't I just warn you about the dangers of drawing negative attention?

00:18:23This makes us look like tabloid trash.

00:18:26The Governor will never lend us the money now.

00:18:29Your careless affairs might cost us the entire crowd.

00:18:32I can explain.

00:18:34You've left me no choice but to delay your coronation.

00:18:37Perhaps indefinitely.

00:18:39You can't do that. She's not just a random girl.

00:18:42She's my new girlfriend, Mia.

00:18:45Oh really? And who is this Mia?

00:18:48Well, she's a respectable young woman.

00:18:51She's a librarian.

00:18:53A librarian?

00:18:55How common.

00:18:57But that's just her cover.

00:18:59She's actually a princess.

00:19:02Oh really? Of what country?

00:19:07A small island off the coast of Italy.

00:19:10And what is the name of this island?

00:19:15Umbrelia.

00:19:16Umbrelia?

00:19:17Yes. Umbrelia.

00:19:19It's a beautiful little hidden gem.

00:19:21Really?

00:19:22Her family's reign goes back centuries.

00:19:24And her parents settled in America after they made a fortune in the diamond trade.

00:19:29Interesting.

00:19:30So that would mean that her family is...

00:19:35Filthy rich.

00:19:37Well, this is fabulous news.

00:19:40Of course, you'll have to make your debut as soon as possible so the press can report that this isn't another one of your random hookups.

00:19:47How about the couple makes their debut with the Governor's Masquerade Ball?

00:19:51Shut up, Henry. We're in the middle of an important conversation.

00:19:55I've got it.

00:19:56You can make your debut at the Governor's Masquerade Ball tonight.

00:20:00Wonderful!

00:20:01Wonderful.

00:20:02Wonderful.

00:20:03Yeah!

00:20:04Can we get a picture?

00:20:06Why didn't you tell me he was a prince, Kit?

00:20:09Sorry, sis.

00:20:10I seriously didn't recognize him with a Santa outfit.

00:20:12But how come you didn't recognize him when he took his clothes off?

00:20:16Wasn't wearing my glasses?

00:20:18When is the paparazzi going to leave me alone?

00:20:22Mia, this is the prince.

00:20:25This is like a really big deal.

00:20:26Oh, whatever.

00:20:27All this king and queen stuff is so...

00:20:29Ugh.

00:20:30Nonsense.

00:20:31I hate all this attention. It's such a nightmare.

00:20:35A nightmare?

00:20:36Mia, you hooking up with the prince is like the best thing that's ever happened to me.

00:20:40Well, don't get too excited. It was a one-time thing.

00:20:43Two times, but...

00:20:45He's cocky and arrogant and shallow and here?

00:20:49Mia!

00:20:50What?

00:20:51Mia, please let me up!

00:20:52The prince, he's...

00:20:53Mia!

00:20:54He's downstairs.

00:20:55I really need to talk to you!

00:20:56What are you doing here?

00:20:57I need to talk to you.

00:21:00Privately.

00:21:05Right.

00:21:06Okay.

00:21:07I'll just be in my room.

00:21:09Listening to every single word.

00:21:15You didn't think to mention your literal royalty?

00:21:18I'm sorry.

00:21:19You just didn't seem to care who I was and it was just so refreshing.

00:21:23Plus, it's just common knowledge. People just know who I am.

00:21:29Right.

00:21:31Listen.

00:21:32We had our one night of fun, but I meant what I said was really a one-time thing.

00:21:38I hate all of this attention.

00:21:39Yeah.

00:21:40I'm just a normal girl.

00:21:42Exactly.

00:21:43You're the type of respectable young woman that would look great on my arm and help people

00:21:48take me more seriously as their future king.

00:21:51I'm not following.

00:21:52Hear me out.

00:21:53If we can just pretend to be a happy couple that is madly in love until my coronation next week,

00:21:58he'll ensure the good graces of the press, my kingdom, and most important, the queen.

00:22:05What's that for me?

00:22:08Being on my arm isn't enough.

00:22:11No.

00:22:12I'm gonna give you a lot of money, Mia.

00:22:14Excuse me?

00:22:15We're not talking library money.

00:22:17We're talking money that will change your life.

00:22:20Oh, my God.

00:22:22I know. Genius plan, right?

00:22:24You arrogant prick.

00:22:28You think you can throw your money around and buy a girlfriend like a pizza?

00:22:33Well, I can't be bought.

00:22:36So, take your life-changing money and get the hell out of my house.

00:22:45I don't understand.

00:22:46Let me translate it for you.

00:22:49Get out!

00:23:03Why didn't Mia ride with us?

00:23:20She had work, but she will be here.

00:23:22She better be.

00:23:23Everyone is expecting your debut tonight as a couple.

00:23:26Don't fuck this up.

00:23:28What injury might have, your majesty?

00:23:30Courtney, how lovely to meet you.

00:23:40The pleasure is all mine.

00:23:42My father will be so disappointed to have missed you.

00:23:45Oh, please, give him my regards.

00:23:47Let me introduce you to my son, Declan.

00:23:50I wonder if we could have a moment in private later to discuss some personal business that

00:24:05you could pass on to your father.

00:24:07Absolutely.

00:24:09I wonder if we could have a moment in private later to discuss some personal business that

00:24:17you could pass on to your father.

00:24:18Let him talk d Saintisations was trong,

00:24:20Oh my God.

00:24:21Yes, I just horrified him.

00:24:22I should turn to that.

00:24:23He said, that you could pass.

00:24:24If you understand him or not, I mean committed to them,

00:24:25I'm not sure what he did.

00:24:26Go for pauses after me.

00:24:27I've done over there.

00:24:28I'm cut someуш 보マ

00:24:48I need to find the prince right now.

00:24:58Easy. Governor's Winterball.

00:25:00Okay, stalker.

00:25:02Don't insult my hobbies.

00:25:04I need to go talk to him.

00:25:06Uh, not like that you're not.

00:25:08We gotta get you all ready.

00:25:12So, if we could just get a modest loan, the palace, the whole country really would be so grateful.

00:25:22I'm sure my father would be happy to oblige.

00:25:25Great. It's settled.

00:25:27Not so fast.

00:25:29I'll encourage my father to give you the loan on one condition.

00:25:33Anything.

00:25:34My father would do anything to ensure my happiness.

00:25:37And what would make me happy is him.

00:25:42That's no problem at all.

00:25:44Good.

00:25:45But until he's mine, you won't see a cent.

00:25:48Now, young lady, no one gives orders around here besides me.

00:25:53My son's current girlfriend is a princess with a large fortune.

00:25:58I can assure you, no one has more money than my father, which you would have full access to.

00:26:05And if the prince and I were to marry, well, I would assure that you would maintain complete control of the throne behind the scenes.

00:26:13Young lady, you have a deal.

00:26:15Can I have this dance?

00:26:28Can I have this dance?

00:26:31I have this dance.

00:26:38Do I have a choice?

00:26:40Follow my lead.

00:26:59Smile from the camera, Princess Mia.

00:27:01Who are you wearing, Princess?

00:27:03We love the mask choice.

00:27:05Why are they calling you Princess?

00:27:07We need to talk now.

00:27:08You two want to pose together?

00:27:09Real quick, just one more.

00:27:10There's one more?

00:27:12Who the hell is that?

00:27:13That's his girlfriend, the Princess.

00:27:16Don't worry, I'll take care of her.

00:27:18You better.

00:27:19Or the palace won't get a dime,

00:27:22Your Highness.

00:27:22Why on earth would you tell them I'm a princess?

00:27:31I'm like the opposite of that.

00:27:33Trust me, I'm aware.

00:27:34But I had to explain the photo.

00:27:36I just started lying and I couldn't stop.

00:27:38I mean, a princess sounds better than a librarian.

00:27:40Of course, because being a good person with a normal job isn't good enough.

00:27:44Nothing is good enough for you people.

00:27:46Look, look, I'm sorry I lied, but what's done is done.

00:27:49And let's make the best of things.

00:27:51Let's move forward to my proposal.

00:27:52What makes you think I would ever go through with your idiotic plan?

00:27:56Because why else are you here?

00:27:59Pure desperation.

00:28:01My favorite trait of all.

00:28:03You'll be my loving, doting girlfriend, Princess Mia,

00:28:07until my coronation next week,

00:28:09in exchange for cold hard cash.

00:28:11And after that, you never have to have to speak with me again.

00:28:13We have ourselves a deal.

00:28:17Deal.

00:28:18But no more hooking up, or anything like that.

00:28:21This is strictly business now.

00:28:24Trust me, that won't be a problem.

00:28:42No, no, no.

00:28:51What are you reading for?

00:29:09For fun?

00:29:10You wouldn't have no fun if it'd beat you in the ass.

00:29:13Says the guy that has to pay a girl to hang out with him.

00:29:16All right.

00:29:17All right.

00:29:17Enough foreplay.

00:29:19We have a lot of work to do.

00:29:21Your performance last night left much to be desired.

00:29:24Got a lot of work to turn you into a proper princess.

00:29:26It's not my fault that you lied about who I really am.

00:29:29True.

00:29:30But if you want a dime of that money that I promised you,

00:29:32we'll make it your mission to become Princess Mia.

00:29:36Fine.

00:29:37I'll do it.

00:29:39But was all this really necessary?

00:29:41I had to ensure our absolute privacy.

00:29:45If this lie gets out,

00:29:46the Queen will delay my coronation perhaps indefinitely.

00:29:49We're not leaving this room until you're a proper princess.

00:29:52Now, let's get you royal.

00:29:55What about the Queen?

00:29:56Isn't she going to be back soon?

00:29:58She's out shopping.

00:30:00She'll be out all afternoon.

00:30:01Now, let's get to work.

00:30:11Let's get to work.

00:30:41Let's get to work.

00:31:11I'm exhausted.

00:31:22I'm going to go.

00:31:23Stay for that, my daughter.

00:31:25I insist.

00:31:31What the hell are you doing?

00:31:32You'll have to sleep over, I'm afraid.

00:31:34They'll keep the appearance that we're a real couple.

00:31:36Who cares?

00:31:38The press isn't here.

00:31:39The help is watching my every move.

00:31:41Oh, my God.

00:31:44What have they seen?

00:31:47How do you live like this?

00:31:48That's all I know.

00:31:51Oh, my God.

00:31:52I would feel sorry for you if you weren't such an asshole.

00:31:55Thanks, baby.

00:31:56So you'll sleep with me?

00:31:59I mean, you'll sleep over?

00:32:02Yes, but I'm not happy about it.

00:32:04I'm going to have a shower.

00:32:07No peeking.

00:32:08In your dreams.

00:32:10Hey, you're breathing.

00:32:30You're breathing.

00:32:30Come and stay.

00:32:31Hey, you're breathing.

00:32:33You're breathing.

00:32:33Come and stay.

00:33:35You sure you're okay down there?

00:33:55Oh, you're worried about me.

00:33:57I'm not. I mean, I don't care. I just can't hear you complain all night.

00:34:03I'm fine. Thanks.

00:34:05Just come sleep in the bed.

00:34:15Will you insist?

00:34:15You better not try anything.

00:34:29In your dreams, princess.

00:34:31I can't wait until this arrangement is over.

00:34:34Finally, we agree on something.

00:34:36I need to speak to the prince at once.

00:34:57I'm afraid he's still sleeping.

00:34:59Well then wake him up, you fool!

00:35:01But, um, I don't think he's alone.

00:35:04Good morning, sir.

00:35:32Sorry to wake you, but the queen has asked to speak with you.

00:35:36Now.

00:35:37Of course. We'll get dressed.

00:35:38No.

00:35:39You.

00:35:44Practice is over.

00:35:46It's time for the real test, princess.

00:35:47Hi, Henry.

00:35:50Hello, Mia.

00:35:57Your Majesty.

00:35:59You look even more beautiful up close.

00:36:02I wanted us to have a chance to properly get to know each other.

00:36:06It's been quite whirlwind for you.

00:36:08Yes, it's been a crazy past few days.

00:36:10Well, you should be used to all this, what, with your upbringing.

00:36:13Of course.

00:36:14I was practically born in a ball gown.

00:36:17Tell me, where does your family summer?

00:36:21Uh, the pool?

00:36:22I, I mean, uh, Oliver.

00:36:26Paris, Italy.

00:36:28You name it.

00:36:29We summer there.

00:36:31Tell me more about your family's royal heritage.

00:36:35We come from a small island off the coast of Italy.

00:36:38It's gorgeous.

00:36:39You should totally come visit sometime.

00:36:41My parents made their fortune in emeralds and immigrated here.

00:36:46Diamonds.

00:36:46Excuse me?

00:36:49The prince said that your family made a fortune in diamonds.

00:36:55The prince said that your family made a fortune in diamonds.

00:37:01Right.

00:37:02Diamonds, emeralds, you name it.

00:37:04We made a fortune in it.

00:37:08Would you like some tea?

00:37:10Uh, no thank you.

00:37:12I'm trying to cut back.

00:37:13Being a princess yourself, I'm sure you've given some thought to our monarchy.

00:37:23After all, it might be you sitting up there ruling with the prince someday.

00:37:27You're right.

00:37:29Uh, I mean, yeah, right.

00:37:32Not a fan of our monarchy, are you?

00:37:36Honestly?

00:37:38Please.

00:37:40Not really.

00:37:40At least, I'm not a fan of the way the monarchy has been doing things for the past 500 years.

00:37:47I believe the point of the crown is to serve the people.

00:37:50To do good.

00:37:52My dear, the point of the crown is to uphold tradition and to give the people something to aspire to.

00:38:00With all due respect, I think that way of thinking is of the past.

00:38:05I'm more about the future.

00:38:06Not if I have anything to say about it.

00:38:12How much, you favorite ladies?

00:38:14Ah, Mia, would you give me a moment to have a word with my son in private?

00:38:20No problem.

00:38:21I have to pee anyway.

00:38:23There is absolutely no way you can be with that girl.

00:38:31There is absolutely no way you can be with that girl.

00:38:35Why not?

00:38:36She is not properly trained.

00:38:38What, is she a horse?

00:38:40I thought you wanted me to have a girlfriend.

00:38:41I do, but a more suitable match.

00:38:44But I, the press love her.

00:38:47There's something off about her.

00:38:49So she's a little different, but the status quo is boring.

00:38:52Not boring, classic.

00:38:55You need to be with someone who will ensure that our traditions outlive us all.

00:39:00You married into this family.

00:39:02They're not even your traditions.

00:39:03Like hell they're not.

00:39:04If it weren't for me, this palace would be in shambles.

00:39:07I promised your father on his deathbed that I would uphold the crown and make sure to keep you in line.

00:39:15It is of the utmost importance that you make a suitable match.

00:39:20You need to be with someone educated and refined.

00:39:24Someone like Courtney.

00:39:25Mia's special.

00:39:27Like, you just have to get to know the way that I have.

00:39:30I promise, she's mesmerizing.

00:39:32Declan, it's only a matter of time before everyone knows the truth.

00:39:37Mia is not queen material.

00:39:45Mia!

00:39:47Mia!

00:39:53Mia, please, wait!

00:39:54Just leave me alone.

00:39:55I'm sorry.

00:39:57The queen can be harsh, but she means well.

00:39:59I cannot believe you're defending her.

00:40:01I'm truly sorry.

00:40:02It killed me to have a talk about you like that.

00:40:04I wanted to know you.

00:40:05The real you.

00:40:07Because you're amazing.

00:40:08I don't care.

00:40:09I'm just here for the money, remember?

00:40:11This is all fake.

00:40:12Is this all what we did as a paycheck to?

00:40:13Yep.

00:40:14You don't mean that.

00:40:15Come on, Mia.

00:40:16Give us a smile.

00:40:17Don't tell me what I mean.

00:40:18Yeah, smile for me, dude.

00:40:20Mia.

00:40:21I'm really starting to like you.

00:40:23For real.

00:40:24Give me a break.

00:40:26I am just another one of your shiny new toys.

00:40:28You'll be bored of me in no time and back to your drawer full of condo.

00:40:31Mia, Mia, Mia.

00:40:32Will you all ship?

00:40:33Leave me alone.

00:40:35Mia, come on.

00:40:35We just want one phone.

00:40:36Hey.

00:40:37Oh.

00:40:39Not again.

00:40:40Are you okay?

00:40:42I am now.

00:40:44Of course.

00:40:48Cops?

00:40:48If this gets out, I'm finished.

00:40:51We need to get out of here.

00:40:52Somewhere normal can find us.

00:40:53Somewhere off green.

00:40:55I know the perfect place.

00:40:56Come with me.

00:40:56Okay.

00:41:06Well, well, well.

00:41:07There's a sight for sore eyes.

00:41:10Oh, hey, Daddy.

00:41:12And who do we have here?

00:41:14This is just a friend.

00:41:16Hello, sir.

00:41:17I'm Declan.

00:41:18Mia's boyfriend.

00:41:19Oh, Mia.

00:41:20You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend.

00:41:23Yep.

00:41:23He's my boyfriend.

00:41:26We're super in love.

00:41:28It's nice to meet you, sir.

00:41:31Who are you calling, sir?

00:41:33Call me Charlie.

00:41:35Welcome, son.

00:41:40Let me know if there's anything I do to help.

00:41:43Declan, it's okay.

00:41:44Sure, sure.

00:41:46The cows aren't going to milk themselves.

00:41:48We don't have cows.

00:41:50Come on.

00:41:51Let's do it.

00:41:53Oh.

00:41:54Get you.

00:42:01You're welcome.

00:42:06Oh.

00:42:10Oh.

00:42:11Yeah.

00:42:11Oh.

00:42:12Oh, you guys did a good job.

00:42:31This is delicious.

00:42:32Thank you so much, sir.

00:42:34It's my pleasure.

00:42:36It's been a long time since me

00:42:38and brought a boy home.

00:42:39A real long time.

00:42:40And a prince at that.

00:42:42Well, look, I'm just happy that you're happy.

00:42:46And if your mother were here,

00:42:48she would be happy too.

00:42:50So thank you for loving her.

00:42:54You're welcome.

00:42:55Mia's easy to love.

00:42:57It's so nice to have you home.

00:43:00Well, I still have a home.

00:43:02Look, I'm sure Mia already told you

00:43:05we're going to lose the farm.

00:43:07I can't afford the mortgage anymore.

00:43:12I mean, I've never said anything.

00:43:17Uh, enough for the depressing vibes.

00:43:25You're welcome.

00:43:27Come with me.

00:43:29Yeah.

00:43:30Hey, remember,

00:43:36in my house,

00:43:37you're still a virgin.

00:43:37I can't believe you grew up out here.

00:43:53Is this your idea of fun?

00:43:55Playing dress up in your dad's old clothing?

00:43:57Hey, when you're in the country,

00:43:59you'll have to get creative.

00:44:06Have a look.

00:44:07Like the opposite of a prince.

00:44:16Perfect.

00:44:18Well,

00:44:20why didn't you say anything about

00:44:24your dad being hurt?

00:44:27Kind of a heavy story.

00:44:28Sorry.

00:44:30I can do heavy.

00:44:33Please.

00:44:34When I was really little,

00:44:41I got sick.

00:44:43Pneumonia.

00:44:45And I was

00:44:46in and out of the hospital.

00:44:49Medical bills were really high.

00:44:52My dad was working around the clock

00:44:53trying to make as much money as possible.

00:44:56I was exhausted,

00:44:58barely sleeping,

00:44:59and there was an accident.

00:45:00He was exhausted,

00:45:04barely sleeping,

00:45:05and there was an accident.

00:45:08Fell off of his tractor,

00:45:09and

00:45:09it ran him over.

00:45:13Nearly snapped his spine in half.

00:45:16I mean,

00:45:16it was just really hard for him

00:45:17to do work around the farm.

00:45:20It was really stressful

00:45:21on my mom.

00:45:23She's doing everything.

00:45:27I think it broke her.

00:45:30One day she went

00:45:34to go get groceries

00:45:35and

00:45:36never came back.

00:45:41Oh, Mia.

00:45:42I know I was just a kid,

00:45:43and I know it wasn't my fault,

00:45:45but

00:45:45I just think that deep down,

00:45:50I think that everything

00:45:50bad that happens

00:45:52is because of me.

00:45:53I totally get it.

00:45:56You do?

00:45:57Yeah.

00:45:59My real mom.

00:46:00died when I was little.

00:46:02She was in a car accident

00:46:03on her way to come

00:46:04and watch me

00:46:05at swim practice.

00:46:08I hate swimming to this day.

00:46:12That's awful.

00:46:12I'm so sorry.

00:46:16Thanks.

00:46:19You know,

00:46:19when people say that,

00:46:20I usually feel their pity,

00:46:21but with you,

00:46:22you know,

00:46:22it feels different.

00:46:28Knowing we share the same pain,

00:46:29it helps ease it a little.

00:46:33So,

00:46:33thank you.

00:46:45Can I show you something?

00:46:47No.

00:46:52Not bad.

00:46:57Ready to swim again?

00:46:59Make some new memories?

00:47:03I'm not quite ready yet.

00:47:06That's okay.

00:47:08We can just look at it for now.

00:47:10Baby steps.

00:47:13Thanks.

00:47:13Let's go.

00:47:14Let's go.

00:47:15Let's go.

00:47:16Let's go.

00:47:17Let's go.

00:47:18Let's go.

00:47:19Let's go.

00:47:20Let's go.

00:47:21Let's go.

00:47:22Let's go.

00:47:23Let's go.

00:47:24Let's go.

00:47:43so are you excited about your coronation yeah of course

00:47:51you don't sound very excited

00:47:55i'm pretty nervous to be on king i mean i'm gonna be leading an entire nation

00:48:03and i've got so many plans of where to take our country but nobody takes me seriously

00:48:08just they think i'm a silly party boy what are your ideas they're dumb forget it

00:48:16how can you be the judge of that okay i'm very passionate about the environment

00:48:25i love finding alternative forms of energy in my country there's some of the most intense ones in

00:48:30the world and they're these wind turbines that are state-of-the-art and they can harness that

00:48:38energy they can convert for cars planes buildings homes you name it

00:48:46wow that's actually a really good idea really yeah you're really smart why are you such a fuck up

00:48:53well when my father passed away it was just it was a lot

00:49:04it's a bit too much in fact so i just numb out at a party

00:49:12yeah really yeah right miss perfect

00:49:16me i didn't even finish college why not let's just talk about something else

00:49:26come on i just poured my heart the least you can do is return the favor

00:49:32fine so i went to a very fancy school i was a scholarship student of course so i felt

00:49:40out of place already insecure

00:49:46but i met this boy

00:49:50i fell so madly hopelessly in love

00:49:57there's the most amazing feeling in the world

00:50:02it felt like i was flying

00:50:03and then i walked in on him cheating on me with someone else

00:50:13it wasn't it wasn't just someone else it was the prettiest richest most popular girl in school

00:50:20i spiraled

00:50:29i couldn't sleep

00:50:30i couldn't study and i i ended up dropping out of college

00:50:36i i just think that

00:50:40getting cheated on was

00:50:45confirmation of my deepest fears that i'm not good enough

00:50:51well the mia that i know is more than enough

00:50:55she's likable

00:50:59even lovable

00:51:02she's amazing

00:51:13what about the rules

00:51:14scrayed rules

00:51:23you

00:51:44.

00:52:14.

00:52:24I can't believe the prince is dating Mia and he hasn't seen through her lies yet.

00:52:28What do you mean?

00:52:30Well, I know where they are. Obviously they're hiding at Mia's farm.

00:52:35Farm? I thought Mia was a princess.

00:52:39Mia! I can assure you she is the furthest thing from a princess.

00:52:45Tell me everything.

00:52:49.

00:53:09.

00:53:15.

00:53:16.

00:53:17.

00:53:18.

00:53:19.

00:53:20.

00:53:21.

00:53:22.

00:53:23.

00:53:24.

00:53:25.

00:53:35.

00:53:36.

00:53:37.

00:53:38.

00:53:39.

00:53:40.

00:53:41.

00:53:42.

00:53:43.

00:53:44.

00:53:45.

00:53:46.

00:53:47.

00:53:48.

00:53:49.

00:53:50.

00:53:51.

00:53:52.

00:53:53.

00:53:54.

00:53:55.

00:53:56.

00:53:57.

00:53:58.

00:53:59.

00:54:00.

00:54:13.

00:54:14.

00:54:15.

00:54:16.

00:54:17.

00:54:18.

00:54:19.

00:54:20.

00:54:21.

00:54:22.

00:54:23.

00:54:24.

00:54:25.

00:54:26in a nearly fatal tractor accident when she was young and her mom took off for groceries one day

00:54:33and never came home. Poor prince got played. Oh my god. The last thing we need is for our name to

00:54:41be associated with a tractor. How does information get out? Who cares? The point is that Mia is a liar

00:54:47and has made a fool of us all. I only wish that I had found out sooner. Oh no, this is all my fault.

00:54:52I'm the one who lied about Mia being a princess. The details don't matter. Everything has gone to

00:54:58shit since that girl came into your life. I need to find Mia. Forget Mia. We have much more important

00:55:03things to discuss. No, nothing's more important than Mia. Where are you going? Come back here. Don't you

00:55:08take another step. Should I call a doctor? No, you fool. There's nothing wrong with me.

00:55:15You're going to take Mia down for good.

00:55:45What are you doing here? I need to talk to you. I am done talking. Just go. Just please listen to me.

00:56:06I'm sorry about that stupid article. You're sorry. A sorry excuse for a human being. You don't mean

00:56:14that. You're not thinking clearly. Please just go. No, I need you to know the truth. Why? Why is it so

00:56:23important? Why do you care? Because I like you, Mia. I really fucking do. Listen, I feel terrible

00:56:34about that article. I had nothing to do with it, I promise. The press are like vultures. What about

00:56:40all of the personal information? My dad's accident? My mom leaving? You are the only person I told.

00:56:47Oh, is this some plan to leak my personal trauma to the press to make yourself look better? Is this...

00:56:56What kind of sick game are you playing? Do you really think I'm that cruel? Jesus,

00:57:00Mia, after everything we've been through. How could you think so little of me? It's one thing

00:57:05for them to attack me. They attacked my family. They didn't ask for any of this. Mia, I love your

00:57:12family. I would never betray them. I knew I was right about you. You're no king. You're just a spoiled

00:57:17little prince. I knew this was too good to be true. I don't know why I was so stupid. I can't

00:57:22believe you don't trust me. How can I trust you when our entire relationship is built on a lie?

00:57:27We are so much more than a lie, and you know that. I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry.

00:57:36I'm done. We're done. Mia, forget the agreement. I need you in my life. Declan, stop. This is pathetic.

00:57:44Whatever this is, it's over. You're breaking up with me? We weren't even together, Mia. I'm ending

00:57:53our agreement. Your services are no longer required. We didn't even make it to the core nation. Your

00:57:58payment will be voided. I don't care about the money. That'll be a first. Goodbye forever.

00:58:04Forever can't come soon enough.

00:58:14There you go. I have just the thing to cheer you up.

00:58:41Good morning, Your Royal Highness. Hi, Courtney. Declan, help your lovely date to her seat.

00:59:00Call the press. The hottest new couple in town is going to make their debut tonight.

00:59:05The hottest new couple in town is going to make their debut tonight. I smell a press release.

00:59:20What a beautiful day. You gotta love this city.

00:59:23Okay, what's going on? You hate New York City. I can never get you to come visit me.

00:59:33I just want to tell you the good news in person. What news? We're not going to lose the farm.

00:59:39My God. That's amazing. What happened? Thank you. Your prints happened. What, huh?

00:59:46Yeah. Yeah. When you guys came to visit me and he heard about our troubles, he immediately gave me the

00:59:52money. Enough to cover the mortgage and more. He didn't want me to tell you because he didn't

00:59:59want it to seem like we were some kind of charity case. But I can't keep a secret. He's a good man,

01:00:07you got there. The nicest thing anybody's ever done for me. Well, honey, that's love. Oh no.

01:00:22I messed everything up. It's too late. It's never too late for true love. Oh my God.

01:00:31I gotta go. Where are you going? To kiss the prince.

01:00:38Thanks, Daddy.

01:00:40It's you.

01:00:47It's you. Hello again, Mia.

01:00:53Oh my God. I'm so stupid.

01:00:59Mia, wait. Stop.

01:01:01I promise you nothing was happening.

01:01:05The Queen's forced me to be with her and I've never been more miserable.

01:01:20I can't believe this is happening again.

01:01:22Again? Courtney is the girl that my boyfriend cheated on me with in college.

01:01:31She destroyed my life. It wasn't just someone else. It was the prettiest, richest, most popular girl in

01:01:40school. Oh, I won't let this happen.

01:01:45No, no, Mia. She means nothing to me.

01:01:48You've broken my heart, your majesty.

01:02:06Mia, wait.

01:02:10It's not what it seems to me.

01:02:12It's not you again.

01:02:14Oh, oh, oh.

01:02:16Jacqueline!

01:02:26Are you okay?

01:02:27Me? You're the one that just got attacked by the paps.

01:02:30I had to get your attention somehow.

01:02:33Mission accomplished.

01:02:36I'm sorry about Courtney.

01:02:37It all makes sense.

01:02:39Courtney is the one that leaked my family's secrets to the press.

01:02:42I'm sorry. I didn't believe you.

01:02:44All I ever want is for you to be happy.

01:02:48Why do you care so much?

01:02:50Because I love you, Mia.

01:02:52I love you too.

01:03:12I'm feeling better already.

01:03:15Yeah.

01:03:19What about our agreement?

01:03:21Forget about the agreement.

01:03:23Be with me for real.

01:03:25Okay.

01:03:28Be together for real.

01:03:30All right.

01:03:45I just spoke with the doctor.

01:04:05Peter, you got your test results back and you're going to be just fine.

01:04:09Great.

01:04:11Now, can you please go take a break?

01:04:13You haven't slept a wink or eaten a thing since we got back from the hospital.

01:04:17No, I'm never leaving your side again.

01:04:20Mia, please take care of yourself.

01:04:22At least go to the bathroom.

01:04:24I promise I'll be here when we get back.

01:04:34Fine.

01:04:36I'll be right back.

01:04:38Love you.

01:04:40I like the sound of that.

01:04:51What the hell is she doing here?

01:04:53I thought we got rid of her for good.

01:04:55Apparently not.

01:04:57Your plan backfired and now they're more in love than ever before.

01:05:01What are we going to do?

01:05:04I have a plan.

01:05:06Going to send Mia on a permanent vacation from which she will never ever return.

01:05:11I'm going to need your help.

01:05:23I'm going to need your help.

01:05:34Fine, Mia.

01:05:34What are you doing here, Courtney?

01:05:37I have something that might be of interest to you.

01:05:39I have something that might be of interest to you.

01:05:39Nothing you have to say is interesting to me.

01:05:41I have a plan

01:05:49I'm going to send Mia on a permanent vacation

01:05:53from which she will never, ever return

01:05:55You deserve to know the truth about the Queen

01:05:57Mia, she wants to destroy you

01:06:00Now you have proof

01:06:02Thank you

01:06:06But I'm confused

01:06:09Why are you helping me?

01:06:12We hate each other, remember?

01:06:14This is so much bigger than all the past drama

01:06:17As much as I want to be with the Prince

01:06:19I can see how much he truly loves you

01:06:21I don't want to be in the way of true love

01:06:23You're the real princess, Mia

01:06:27I guess I am, aren't I?

01:06:33And for what it's worth

01:06:34I'm really sorry for everything that happened in college

01:06:39To be honest, I was always a little jealous of you back in the day

01:06:44You were always so different and interesting

01:06:48I wish we could have been friends

01:06:51Well

01:06:52If you want to be friends

01:06:56Then just maybe stop hooking up with my boyfriends

01:06:58And

01:06:59Just need a coffee

01:07:01Deal

01:07:01Thank you

01:07:04Come here

01:07:05Thank you

01:07:06If I'm going to take on the Queen, I'm going to need it

01:07:19Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

01:07:49I'm comfortable, my darling. Would you like another pillow?

01:07:54Where did Mia go? She said she was just going to the bathroom.

01:07:57I'm sorry, but she left hours ago.

01:08:02Did she say where she's going or when she's coming back?

01:08:06She told me to tell you that she just doesn't want to be with you anymore.

01:08:12It's over. I'm sorry, son.

01:08:16I don't understand. She just told me she loved me.

01:08:20You just can't trust a girl like that.

01:08:23She dumped you days before the most important moment of your life, your coronation.

01:08:28Now you don't even have a date.

01:08:31But not to worry, I have just the girl for you.

01:08:35I'll alert the press tomorrow that you are no longer with Mia

01:08:39and will be taking Courtney to the coronation.

01:08:42Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

01:09:04You and the prince can no longer be together.

01:09:11Screw you, whoever you are.

01:09:14I love him and nothing can stop me.

01:09:16You better stay away from him or else.

01:09:23Henry?

01:09:23Henry, you have to let me go.

01:09:35Please, I'm begging you.

01:09:37I'm sorry.

01:09:38I wish I could, ma'am.

01:09:40But I have direct orders from the queen to hold you hostage

01:09:43until you agree to never see the prince again.

01:09:47I can't believe she made you kidnap me yourself.

01:09:51She couldn't, like, hire out for that?

01:09:53She's trying to keep costs down lately.

01:09:56It's not a money thing.

01:09:57She doesn't respect you, Henry.

01:09:59She doesn't need to.

01:10:00I'm just the help.

01:10:01You're her secret weapon.

01:10:03You keep this whole ship running.

01:10:04You're incredible, Henry.

01:10:07I am?

01:10:08It's time for the queen's reign to end.

01:10:11I'm going to take her down.

01:10:14Please, help me.

01:10:17I'm sorry.

01:10:18I can't betray her.

01:10:20She's family.

01:10:22But how is that possible?

01:10:26The queen is my aunt.

01:10:29She hired me when she married the king and became a royal.

01:10:32But the queen grew up very poor in the countryside.

01:10:35Her parents were farmers.

01:10:37Just like you, in fact.

01:10:40So the queen hates me because she is me?

01:10:44It's all quite poetic.

01:10:46You have to do the right thing, Henry.

01:10:56You won't regret it.

01:10:57I promise.

01:10:58Declan, are you excited for your coronation?

01:11:07Very much so, yes.

01:11:08What have you enjoyed most about your time in America?

01:11:12Countryside.

01:11:14Farm life.

01:11:16Steel lake.

01:11:17The full moon.

01:11:18The prince will take one more question.

01:11:22Who's the lucky lady you're going to be taking to your coronation?

01:11:25Mia?

01:11:29Where have you been?

01:11:35It's a long story.

01:11:37It involved getting kidnapped by your stepmom.

01:11:40What?

01:11:41She's behind everything, Declan.

01:11:43I can prove it.

01:11:45Don't listen to her.

01:11:46She's crazy.

01:11:47You don't have to listen to me.

01:11:49Listen to yourself.

01:11:51I have a plan.

01:11:52Going to send Mia on a permanent vacation from which she will never, ever return.

01:11:58Declan, I only want what's best for you.

01:12:00No, you only want what's best for yourself.

01:12:02Your evil antics won't work anymore.

01:12:07You're done.

01:12:08You're banished.

01:12:09You can't do that.

01:12:11Like hell I can't.

01:12:12I'm going to be assuming my rightful place is king tomorrow during the coronation, just

01:12:16as my father intended.

01:12:17What will I do?

01:12:19Without my kind, I'll come nothing.

01:12:21I finally understand why you hate me so much.

01:12:26You grow up poor just like me.

01:12:28You're so afraid to lose your power, but power comes from within.

01:12:33It's about loving someone and letting someone love you.

01:12:37True power, it can't be bought.

01:12:39It's priceless.

01:12:43There's a new queen in town.

01:12:52Well, congrats to the happy couple.

01:12:55Courtney, I hope that your father will still consider granting the palace alone.

01:13:00Sorry, my father doesn't do charity.

01:13:02Courtney, wait.

01:13:04Declan has some amazing ideas for his reign as king.

01:13:08I do.

01:13:10I do.

01:13:11I would love to share them with you and your father.

01:13:15I really should be going.

01:13:17Two minutes.

01:13:19Just two minutes.

01:13:22I'll give you one.

01:13:25Well, I'm very passionate about the environment.

01:13:29I believe environmental activism is actually quite profitable.

01:13:33I want to invest in alternative energies.

01:13:36For example, I recently discovered this new state-of-the-art wind turbine that is more efficient

01:13:40than most fossil fuels.

01:13:42My first order of business will be to erect these turbines all over the country.

01:13:47We'll do good for our planet and also make a boatload of money doing it.

01:13:50Now, that is something we would definitely be interested in investing in.

01:14:06Henry, you idiot!

01:14:07Bring my car around!

01:14:09I'm afraid I must attend to my new boss.

01:14:12The king.

01:14:13What am I supposed to do?

01:14:15Have you tried the subway?

01:14:17Everyone has come out to celebrate our new king, Sir Declan.

01:14:27Long live the king.

01:14:29The king is in great spirits.

01:14:31All thanks to the lovely lady on his arm, Mia.

01:14:36You look perfect.

01:14:38Well, it's not my reindeer costume, but it'll do.

01:14:41Oh, my God.

01:14:46Mia, will you do me and the entire kingdom the honor of being our queen?

01:14:52Yes!

01:14:53Yes!

01:14:54Of course!

01:14:56Yes!

01:14:58Oh!

01:14:58Kurt and I fell in love when we were 17.

01:15:23We're sneaking off to a cabin this weekend to celebrate our anniversary.

01:15:27Chloe!

01:15:27Have you guys seen Kurt?

01:15:29Kurt, baby?

01:15:30Kurt, baby?

01:15:32I can't believe this.

01:15:34I didn't know you were going to be here tonight.

01:15:36Happy anniversary.

01:15:38You've been to the cabin for the weekend, so we're here to bring you up there.

01:15:42You know, guys, there's one thing you didn't think about when you kidnapped me.

01:15:45There's only one bed in this cabin.

01:15:47This is an all-out war for Chloe's heart.

01:15:50Game on.

01:15:50You really think about me like that?

01:15:52Chloe, you are all I think about.

01:15:54What's one of the ways you guys are planning to spoil me this weekend?

01:15:57We would do anything for you.

01:16:00Me?

01:16:01And I swear to you, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you laugh like that.

01:16:05But I want you to choose me.

01:16:07Chloe, if you're choosing him over me, I need to know right now.

01:16:10Okay?

01:16:10I can't stand it.

01:16:11Jack, you need to relax.

01:16:12Relax?

01:16:13The woman I love is slipping through my fingers!

01:16:15You think you're the only one that loves her?

01:16:17You love me?

01:16:19Looks like we're going to be here a little longer than two nights if it keeps coming down like...

01:16:22What was that?

01:16:25Storm knocked a little power out.

01:16:27He too.

01:16:27You are worth fighting for.

01:16:30Even if it means fighting with my best friend in the whole world.

01:16:34This weekend has meant everything to me.

01:16:36Let's make a deal then, baby girl.

01:16:38For one more night.

01:16:39You don't have to choose.

01:16:40Will you be here in the morning?

01:16:45Just as the sun is rising.

01:16:48How many people can say they're half of the perfect couple?

01:16:52Feels so good when you're next to me.

01:16:54Kurt and I fell in love when we were 17.

01:16:58He was the captain of the soccer team, and I never thought he would notice me, but...

01:17:04Will you be my everything?

01:17:06Suddenly, we're soulmates.

01:17:08We came to college together, where he met Jack on the soccer team and Emmett in business classes.

01:17:18But even with these two in his life, he always made time to surprise me.

01:17:22And I got two new guy friends in my life as a bonus.

01:17:26Over-protective, sure, but always looking out for my best interests.

01:17:32It's been five years since our first kiss.

01:17:34We're sneaking off to a cabin this weekend to celebrate our anniversary.

01:17:39And I'm pretty sure this is it.

01:17:43He's going to propose we get married after graduation.

01:17:46Cause you are my everything

01:17:49Drink self, light self

01:17:59I like the small talk, but it's over now

01:18:02Light it up, give me some

01:18:04I like the way you tease me with your soft lips

01:18:08White case

01:18:10You're the one I can't resist

01:18:11She's the woman I wanted to see

01:18:15Chloe!

01:18:16Hey, beautiful

01:18:17Hey!

01:18:17Let me go get you a drink.

01:18:19You shouldn't have to push your way through a crowd

01:18:22Whoa!

01:18:23Watch where the fuck you're going, buddy.

01:18:24You almost ran right into her.

01:18:25These people are animals, huh?

01:18:27Okay!

01:18:28You look stunning!

01:18:29Oh, thank you.

01:18:30So, have you guys seen Kurt?

01:18:35I haven't, no, but didn't know you were going to make an appearance.

01:18:39Yeah, I thought you had that huge midterm you had to finish your British life.

01:18:42Yeah, I actually finished it early.

01:18:45Plus, Kurt surprised me with a bottle of champagne and cookies at my doorstep.

01:18:49I thought maybe it was my turn to surprise him back.

01:18:52Hmm.

01:18:53Well, we even see him in a hot minute, but knowing Kurt, he's probably hiding in some dark corners somewhere.

01:18:58Okay.

01:19:00I'll do a lot.

01:19:02Thanks, kids.

01:19:04Excuse me.

01:19:06Kurt, baby?

01:19:08Kurt, baby?

01:19:10He always did like surprises.

01:19:12Louie!

01:19:14I can't believe this!

01:19:16I can't believe this!

01:19:18I can't believe this!

01:19:20I can't believe this!

01:19:22I can't believe this!

01:19:24I can't believe this!

01:19:26I can't believe this!

01:19:28I have to go!

01:19:30Chloe, wait!

01:19:31Shit!

01:19:32Hey!

01:19:33Chloe, stop!

01:19:34Chloe, wait!

01:19:35Hey!

01:19:36Chloe!

01:19:37Chloe!

01:19:38Chloe!

01:19:39I didn't know you were going to be here tonight.

01:19:42Oh, so that makes it okay?

01:19:43Well, you don't need to be such a fucking bitch about it.

01:19:46I'm the bitch?

01:19:47After catching you ready to fuck some other girl?

01:19:50What, is this some sort of fucking shock to you?

01:19:52I didn't want you to follow me to college like some dumb dog I can't get rid of, okay?

01:19:56I never asked for any of this in the first place!

01:19:58You can't fucking talk to her like that!

01:20:00Fuck off!

01:20:01Happy anniversary!

01:20:02Whoa!

01:20:03Sweetheart, hey!

01:20:04What's wrong?

01:20:05What's going on?

01:20:06It's Kurt.

01:20:07I have to go.

01:20:08Chloe!

01:20:09How can you fucking cheat on Chloe like that, huh?

01:20:10What the fuck are you doing?!

01:20:11Get off me!

01:20:12Kurt!

01:20:13You cheat on Chloe, son of a bitch!

01:20:14Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Twitter, YouTube!

01:20:15Hey, what's going on?

01:20:16It's Kurt!

01:20:17I have to go!

01:20:18Chloe!

01:20:19How can you fucking cheat on Chloe like that, huh?

01:20:20What the fuck are you doing?

01:20:21Get off of me!

01:20:22Kurt, you cheat on Chloe?

01:20:23Son of a bitch!

01:20:31Chloe, you've got visitors.

01:20:33Goodness, it's not Kurt.

01:20:34Knock, knock.

01:20:35Hey, Beautiful.

01:20:36Come on, buddy.

01:20:37Jack? Emmett? What are you-

01:20:42We decided what you need most right now is to be kidnapped.

01:20:46You know you rented the cabin for the weekend, so we're here to bring you up there. You deserve to get your vacation.

01:20:52But you guys are his best friends.

01:20:54You really think we want to still be friends with him after what he did to you? Not a chance, sweetheart.

01:20:59We hate seeing you like this. It's breaking our hearts.

01:21:02I don't know, guys. That's very sweet of you, but I'm just not really on a vacation then.

01:21:07Oh, come on, Claude. We'll go on some hikes. We'll play some games.

01:21:11We'll cook. We'll get drunk. And most importantly, we'll get your mind off this shit show.

01:21:19You guys, I thought I was going to marry him. I just had my heart shattered.

01:21:26Well, let me help you mend it.

01:21:28And when Emmett inevitably doesn't, I will be there to actually put you back together.

01:21:35The point is, we're not taking no for an answer.

01:21:38Yeah, we will bring you out to the car, holding you if we have to. Come on, you're coming with us.

01:21:44The only choice you have in the matter is what clothes you get to bring.

01:21:48Personally, I think you look great in red.

01:21:50Emmett's an idiot. I know you look amazing in everything.

01:21:53So, what do you say? Want to splash some water in your face and have the best weekend of your life with me?

01:21:59I guess Jack will be there too.

01:22:01Haha, very funny. So, are we carrying you out of here? Or are you going to walk out of here yourself, baby girl?

01:22:07Whenever I'm in love, yeah, I'm all in it. I haven't felt this way in a half minute. Everyone before you is now in it.

01:22:19I like the way you move, yeah, you feel different. I just want to tell you what's on my mind. The other ones are for you and I'm surprised.

01:22:26Here we go. Setting you down now, beautiful?

01:22:30I said I could walk.

01:22:32I said I would take every opportunity to have you in my arms.

01:22:36Hey, this place is nice.

01:22:39Hot Cart was going to propose to meet here.

01:22:42Figured we'd have the pictures for the rest of our lives.

01:22:46Sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry.

01:22:48Hey, it's okay, sweetheart. You had a really shitty week.

01:22:53I think I might have something that will help with that.

01:22:56How about we pop this bad boy open and cheers to a lovely weekend?

01:23:00I do love champagne.

01:23:02I know you do.

01:23:03Really? Did I tell you that?

01:23:05I think just once, but I remembered.

01:23:10Besides, I gotta be honest, I snagged this one from your own kitchen.

01:23:13How did you know she even had it?

01:23:15Well, because I'm actually the one that left it for you.

01:23:22I knew that you were finishing up your midterms.

01:23:26I didn't want to surprise you. It was me. It wasn't Kurt.

01:23:30If we're being honest here, those peanut butter cookies were for me.

01:23:36I made them for you one time and you said that they were the best cookies you've ever had.

01:23:41You guys did that for me? Why?

01:23:43Well, I mean, I can't speak for Jack, but I knew that Kurt would forget how much that paper meant to you.

01:23:50Yeah, and I know you love surprises and didn't want Chloe to be disappointed.

01:23:54Making cookies is a little more time consuming than buying champagne.

01:23:58Okay, shut up. I mean, we both had the same thought.

01:24:00But if you want to tell us which one of the presents was better, be open to that too, baby girl.

01:24:07I can't pick. They were both so thoughtful.

01:24:11I can't believe you guys would do something like that for me when my own boyfriend didn't even remember.

01:24:15Well, hey, he's not your boyfriend anymore. Yeah. We are both aware that you were very, very single.

01:24:23You know, guys, there's one thing you didn't think about when you kidnapped me.

01:24:28Trust us. We thought of everything.

01:24:30If you had thought of everything, then you would have thought about the fact that there's only one bed in this cabin.

01:24:35When I was planning a romantic getaway for Kurt, I didn't plan for guest star appearances.

01:24:40Oh, believe me. I thought about that.

01:24:43Oh, did you?

01:24:44Mm-hmm. I thought about you and me sharing that bed.

01:24:47Oh, that couch is more jack-sized than me, bro.

01:24:50Chloe and I should be sleeping together.

01:24:52How about I just sleep on the couch?

01:24:54Absolutely not. No, this weekend is about spoiling you.

01:24:57That doesn't kick off with you having to sleep on a lumpy-ass couch.

01:25:00All right, then it's settled. You and I will snuggle up in that bed.

01:25:03What the hell you are? You don't get to just call dibs like that.

01:25:07How about a compromise?

01:25:09How in the world are we supposed to share the sexiest woman in the cabin?

01:25:13I'm the only woman in this cabin.

01:25:15Let's just settle on taking turns. That way, each of you only get one night on the couch.

01:25:19The couch isn't what I'm worried about.

01:25:21It's this guy making a move on him is what I'm worried about.

01:25:24Come on, bro. Like, you're not going to be slobbering all over her?

01:25:27Guys, guys, guys. One night keeps it fair and cuddly for everyone.

01:25:33Only problem, though, is who gets the first day.

01:25:37I think I have a way we can compete for that.

01:25:45Yeah! Okay!

01:25:47Rules of the game are we all ask each other questions.

01:25:51If you don't want to answer a question, take a drink.

01:25:55If you drink, you lose the game.

01:25:58Okay, game on, bro.

01:26:00All right, Emmett. What is the most humiliating thing that's ever happened to you?

01:26:05Oh, I, uh, I split my pants right down the ass in the middle of a PowerPoint presentation.

01:26:13Oh, my God.

01:26:14Yeah, you'll have to do better than that.

01:26:16Catching her cheating on me. God, that's a really depressing answer.

01:26:21Okay, it's my turn. Um, I need to pick me up after reliving that in my head.

01:26:26Um, what's one of the ways you guys are planning to spoil me this weekend?

01:26:31Well, I will be giving you the best massage of your entire life.

01:26:34And I will run you the best bubble bath you've ever had.

01:26:38Not to mention, I'll be cooking for you.

01:26:41I don't think I didn't see the little hot tub out back. We will be spending lots of time in there.

01:26:48Damn, I guess I lost.

01:26:50No worries, sweetheart. The real winner is the guy that gets to end up in bed with you first, which is gonna be me.

01:26:58Shut up and ask your question.

01:27:00All right, uh, Jack, would you be willing to share your internet search history with us?

01:27:12Ha! Fuck you! I win!

01:27:15Asking a man to share his browser history is blatant cheating.

01:27:18Sorry, Jack, I'm with Emmett on this one. Emmett gets the first night.

01:27:21Yeah!

01:27:23Fine. Then I guess I will just get to spoil Chloe first then.

01:27:27Come on over, Chloe.

01:27:29Let's kick this weekend off with a little massage.

01:27:36This isn't over.

01:27:38It can't.

01:27:40That's a really once bad rub I've ever had.

01:27:44You like that?

01:27:45Until you try my spicy veggie chili.

01:27:47Ooh, chili's my favorite.

01:27:49Oh, I know.

01:27:50Are you gonna come and help me with this?

01:27:52Absolutely.

01:27:53Anything to get dinner on the table faster.

01:27:57Hold on.

01:27:58You gotta be in uniform to be in my kitchen.

01:28:06Again?

01:28:07Mm-hmm.

01:28:13Stop it.

01:28:14You're distracting me from cutting.

01:28:16Maybe. I can't help myself.

01:28:20I need some music.

01:28:24All right. See?

01:28:25Bobby?

01:28:26Whoo!

01:28:28See you.

01:28:30See you.

01:28:31See you.

01:28:32I'm getting married.

01:28:33Oh, shit!

01:28:34See you.

01:28:37I can't help you.

01:28:38See you, David.

01:28:39I can't help you.

01:28:41Okay.

01:28:42What?

01:28:43I have fun.

01:28:44I can do this.

01:28:46hyvin.

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