00:00How do you protect yourself from zina? The reality is number one, number one. Everyone listen to this. It's not what you think I'm going to say. Self-restraint. Restrain yourself. You can restrain yourself. I mean, I had a 14-year-old come to me not so long ago. How do I protect myself from zina? I want to get married. Come on, be a little bit realistic. You've got to protect yourself. You restrain yourself. Sabor, Sabor. Come on, your day will come. When we were young, we also used to look at the opposite sex sometimes and think, when will I ever get married? Today, MashaAllah, you know, we've
00:29got children of our own. MashaAllah, I'm sitting on about eight children by the will of Allah. So, SubhanAllah, to be honest with you, you have to protect yourself. That's what Sabor is all about. You reward. The reward you're going to get is for abstaining from prohibition. That's the reward. So not only your salah and your zakah, that's doing good deeds, but abstaining from bad is also a reward. So here's your opportunity. Stay back. However, the hadith speaks about fasting. So you will fast. Fast every Monday and Thursday. Fast three times a month.
00:59This will help you concentrate. Have good company. Good company really goes a long way in protecting you from adultery. So what we need to do, SubhanAllah, is protect ourselves, have good company, read a lot of the Quran, go into lessons, try and expand your religious learning. Watch out how you use your phone. How you use your phone. I want to tell you something sad. Many of us feel we're in love with someone because of the phone.
01:29We've got married as a result. A few have been happy, but a lot say, it's not who I thought it was. You know why? Today, like you have Photoshop, you also have Akhlaaq shop, which means somehow their Akhlaaq is shocked. You think that they're really amazing. And when you live with
01:44them, they ignore you, they're on the phone with someone else. And you start thinking, so don't be deceived by the phone. You know, when someone says, I love you, wallahi, so many of them are just saying it because it's just like saying, hello, hi, how are you? And you know what? I love you means sometimes nowadays, I want to use you. That's what it means. I promise you. I promise you it means that. Have you seen what I've said once sometime back on Twitter? I said, if people can say lol without laughing, they can say, I love you without loving.
02:14I tell you a lot of the people say, I love you and actually mean without you knowing, I just want to use you. And because women are generally, you know, emotionally, they get more attached. It's sometimes the youth, the young men who are abusing this attachment. So be careful, abstain, be strict on yourself. You fast, you have good company and you try and engage in more acts of worship. Go out and become a volunteer. Help here, help there. And subhanallah, when the time is right, then you start opening your eyes. And I have one statement for a lot of the brothers
02:44and sisters who are not married. Subhanallah. And that is, before you are married, don't close your eyes onto one person. As tough as that sounds. As tough as it sounds. Once you're engaged, then you close your eyes. Done. Because maybe Allah doesn't want you to marry the person because they are bad, horrible. Or maybe Allah doesn't want it because something might go wrong with the children that couple will have and you don't know. So maybe Allah is keeping you apart. I'm not saying don't try. You try. You
03:14speak to your parents. You convince them. You can even change your wilayah if you want. You know what that means? This is my wali. He's my father. I will go to the panel of scholars and tell them my father is blocking my marriage without any reason. So I want to marry without my dad. And if you qualify for that, you can actually shift that wilayah to a wali will be someone else. Who will it be? That panel of scholars in an Islamic country, you'd have the qadi or someone who would represent you as a wali. So the person becomes a wali of yours.
03:44If you do that and you know that the person you want to marry is not standing on their own two feet in terms of, you know, finances and so on, you might have to come back to your family one day and they might not want you at that stage. I think most families do take you back. But why should we do that? May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala grant us. So if you want to protect yourself from zina, there are steps. The hadith speaks of fasting and lowering your gaze. Today, people watch movies and watch this and you know what?
04:14By the males. I don't know what for. Hijab tutorials. And they forward you and say, did you see this hijab? You know, is this the camel hump? Brother, there's a hump in your head, man. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala forgive us. What are you worried about this thing here for? Take it easy. Let the sisters go ahead and have a peep. But then you look at your wife and you say, you know, I saw the tutorial. I think you need to look a bit like so and so, you know, so and so. May Allah forgive us. So this is why we don't lower our gaze and we don't realize lowering the gaze is very important. Even when it comes to the
04:44screen, I know, you know, you always get wise cracks in the youth. Sometimes they say, but sheikh, I'm lowering my gaze, looking in the screen, you know, I'm lowering my gaze. That's not what it is. You know what I mean. You don't look at these things by the will of Allah. And if you do, you know, you are allowed to say, mashallah, you know, if you really have great intentions, you can even say, inshallah, but it's okay. That's where.
