[Collab entry][YTP] Farts of the Pingas

Entry for the No Humans YTP Collab: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6iQIDsXlOQ

Transcript

00:00the emperor penguin is technically a penguin is technically the emperor the

00:06penguin is technically a homosexual bird although one that makes semen from his

00:11pengus the bird is technically the word although one that makes a turd in the sea

00:17so if you're wondering what he's doing up here on the ice well that's because he

00:29is a fucking dumbass and though he is a bird he is technically not a bird although one

00:35that is a bird he won't fly because he is on the no fly list though he lives in the

00:41sea he won't see because he is a fucking not see mostly he will walk but he won't

00:49walk but he won't walk alone

00:53it is march he said it he said it the birds never stop shitting and farting new roadblocks

01:02will appear to baffle them every year we're not exactly sure what a penguin is perhaps

01:09it's a kind of bird or the sun or some invisible squid or maybe thousands of wasps merged into

01:16a single mass they begin to pursue their journeys purpose smoking crack we don't really know

01:24what they're looking for in a partner we only know that they won't find it because i already

01:29fucked all the penguins with my enormous direction which is actually only a few inches long because

01:35there are fewer males than females here occasionally a female will attempt to mate with another female

01:41so the men don't seem to mind they just take the opportunity to engage in some gay sex

01:48having passed gas the exhausted female must fart quickly

01:52she must eat ass or she will die she must eat tested was as well

01:59and so for the third time this year the mothers take the long walk which is technically a bird

02:06they can hold their breath for over 1700 minutes and die instantly

02:12with the snap of its jaws the leopard seal actually does it all over again

02:19above them the southern lights dance virtually around the clock

02:23no it's the northern lights

02:25aurora borealis at this time of year in this part of antarctica

02:30yes may i see it

02:33he won't see

02:35yeah

02:48you

02:50you

02:52you

02:57you

02:58you

02:59you