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K.DeMarco
  • 2 days ago

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00:00and you still haven't found a mommy for us are you kidding what's going on what's wrong with you
00:07i mean you're trying to kidnap kids mommy mommy daddy we finally found her daddy we cannot let
00:15her know that we're rich i have to make sure that she's going to treat you guys good first
00:18that's a deal get out of my way you touch these kids again and i will kill you
00:26i only make three thousand a month that's fine i'm the driver for a ceo
00:32hey boss bye
00:36seems like he needs our help so let's get to work mom's gonna be very surprised i'll give you
00:43everything you want if you let me what is it we gotta start thinking about baby names
00:50where'd you get the kids
00:51yep her blood pressure is dropping
01:03come on push we're losing her we're losing her
01:10cassandra i can't believe you got yourself knocked up
01:14you're a skank and a disgrace i'm telling you dad i heard she got blackout drunk at
01:20some party and woke up at a motel two towns over you have to do something about her before she
01:25ruins my reputation pouring herself out like that you lose a moral brat you need to get rid of that
01:32bastard child right away before anyone else finds out do you hear me what about your bastard child
01:37right there you didn't have an eye having her behind mom's back so how about this you get rid of
01:44yours and then i'll get rid of mine get out and stay out cassandra mortensen i'm just owning you
01:50great exactly what i wanted to hear
01:54ah
01:55ah
01:56ah
01:57ah
01:58ah
01:59ah
02:00ah
02:01ah
02:03ah
02:04ah
02:05ah
02:06ah
02:07ah
02:08ah
02:09ah
02:10ah
02:11ah
02:12ah
02:13ah
02:14ah
02:15ah
02:16ah
02:17ah
02:18ah
02:19ah
02:20ah
02:26ah
02:27have you found a woman from that night yet?
02:28ah
02:35They are my babies
02:38ah
02:40ah
02:41there are my babies . I'm sorry ma'am. They both had fatal congenital birth defects. They didn't make it.
02:44here you go the babies is promised the mother thinks they're dead and i have the money now
03:03thank you so much for coming i hope you enjoyed let me know if you need anything
03:10thank you yeah thank you uh mr timon hey hi so i was the top sales employee again this month
03:22yep so i was just you know i was wondering if i could get those commission payouts and bonuses
03:31for the past few months please marry me i will pay in cash right now oh not to reject you or anything
03:45because i would never do that that'd be crazy i don't think that my husband would be too happy
03:49about that what yeah you are married ruben or are you fired
03:57for lying to me
04:01damn it how the heck am i supposed to find a husband
04:11here's the posters they put up this week mr steinwall
04:19help wanted sinking mother compensation five million dollars
04:25pants julian steinwall
04:27you rascal what were you thinking putting these up all over the city
04:45hot running talks come on dad you're going on 35 and you still haven't found a mommy for us
04:53all of the kids at school one of us because you obviously can't get a girl
05:00another word out of you chance and there's no allowance for you for a month
05:03every kid grows up with either watch of love or watch of money
05:07you're not willing to give me either i don't want you to be my daddy
05:11pants hold on wait for me
05:16are you kidding
05:18go get them
05:21never my chance
05:24just bring charity
05:26hey what's going on
05:35hey what's going on
05:38what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
05:57what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:02what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:05what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:07what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:10what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:12what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:17what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:22what is wrong with you i mean you're trying to kidnap kids in the middle of broad daylight that's insane
06:23i'm really sorry about that i didn't realize you were your dad i didn't know i'm sorry
06:28don't worry it's a classic rom-com it's cute don't worry mommy i can buy you a drink myself
06:35oh wow thank you so much bud um just one thing why do y'all keep calling me mommy
06:41because i see mommy in my dreams all the time you look just like her
06:46me too i got the same dreams too it's because we're twins
06:50twins mine were fraternal twins too where are my babies i'm sorry ma'am they both had fatal
06:59congenital birth defects they didn't make it anyway mommy what are you looking for in a future
07:08husband chance to knock it off hey now adoption button when kids are talking how about this guy over
07:16here whoa oh my god six feet tall handsome great career two amazing kids but never spends time around any
07:28woman yeah isn't that just your dad's picture i'm actually six foot two chance stop it right now
07:36you're crowded okay stop don't ground him they're having fun clearly it's not a big deal it's okay
07:42mommy daddy actually never grounds us he just pretends to be scary oh yeah charity what do you know
07:49about disciplining kids do you have any kids that's what i thought okay chance charity let's go wait
07:57uh what if we got married
07:59then if if we were married i would be okay disciplining them because they'd be mine
08:08there you are you skank i've been looking all over for you
08:12i maxed out my cards buying you clothes and shoes and you you block my number
08:18excuse me for just a second i'll be a grip
08:23huh i knew it she's just after my money all right we'll go back and wait
08:29hmm cassandra i finally found you you're acting like you haven't seen me in three years it's been
08:40like three days besides you are a married man act like it wait a minute you know i was married
08:51and you still spent my money yes revenge oh also i did send everything i got directly to your wife
09:00so um i hope she loves designer
09:04okay so um anyway y'all got marriage think about it
09:18chance charity come on with the two of you go get some ice cream
09:24yes
09:25sure i'll marry you yeah but just to be clear i don't have a time to find it
09:33are you sure about that because your suit you're wearing looks like really nice actually
09:40i'm the driver for a ceo i only make like eight nine grand a month
09:45eight or nine that's not too bad significantly more than i make so
09:49uh i mean more like eight or nine grand uh quarterly
09:54oh and it fluctuates a lot i only make like two three thousand a month
09:59i mean that's that's not bad that's fine where are you living right now
10:02new parklands
10:03in a one bedroom one bed one bathroom apartment
10:08yeah it's just fairly big enough actually for me and the twins
10:11sorry did you just say new parklands
10:12come on
10:15no that's the literally the heart of the city those places go for what
10:18a couple thousand per square foot
10:21even the smallest ones are like two thousand square feet
10:24even if you were the ceo yourself you probably still couldn't afford to live
10:27there come on
10:28yeah no you're right new parklands is crazy
10:31that's crazy
10:32i know i'm sorry i i just do this thing when i get nervous i just start lying
10:36i do that
10:39no i do that too seriously i i work in sales i literally lie to customers for a living
10:44uh no actually though i'm i'm kidding um it's really it's about
10:49about what
10:51it's all about hard work and not giving up
10:54so
10:54keep working hard maybe you'll get to live there one day
10:58anyway i am cassandra
11:02officially introducing myself i sell shoes for a living
11:06i make about three thousand a month but i make commission
11:10so you know i could help out with the kids expenses
11:12stuff like that
11:13uh-huh
11:14whoa
11:15okay actually
11:15don't say anything
11:18a good saleswoman always gives their customer ample time to think things over
11:22so
11:22no rush
11:24think about my answer
11:25okay
11:26why won't you marry her
11:31i'm not gonna drink my milk anymore if you don't marry her
11:35sure
11:36have it your way
11:38miss margaret
11:40there
11:45happy
11:46and what is it with you two in this fascination with this woman anyway
11:50you don't even know her
11:51don't you remember what happened to you when you were little
11:53your old nanny that i had to fire gave you sleeping pills and tried to kidnap you
11:58daddy had to pay a fortune just to get you back
12:00do you really want that to happen again
12:02no no no no no charity charity i'm so sorry did daddy scare you
12:09no i'm hungry
12:10i really wish you could have milk and cereal right now
12:15well
12:16it's sitting there right in front of you
12:18why don't you just have some right now
12:19okay
12:20no chance your son can't eat anymore if you're not marrying her
12:25chance
12:27i told you to stop dragging your sister into this
12:29which one will you choose
12:31your pride
12:32or my sister who's starving to death
12:35you kids
12:37all right all right all right i'll marry her
12:41okay
12:42happy
12:43there's just one condition that we have to follow
12:47we cannot let her know that we're rich
12:49okay
12:50i have to make sure that she's going to treat you guys good first
12:53deal
12:54well then that's a deal
12:57you little rascals
13:04i have to make sure that she's going to be poor right now
13:09i still got left a few million dollars left for my birthday present and i still want to buy her a huge diamond tiara
13:19no no no silly
13:21that's not enough to get mommy
13:23anything
13:24first let's get focused on getting mommy and daddy married
13:29and then she'll get all daddy's money and that will be a lot more than we have
13:35hello
13:41who is this
13:42this is uh
13:44uh william
13:46stein
13:46okay and
13:48who would that be
13:50your husband
13:50you might want to save this number
13:53oh come on
14:02dude seriously
14:03i mean you are the richest bachelor in winchester
14:06i mean you can marry anybody
14:07and you're letting your kids choose
14:09crazy how one night at a bar seven years ago can completely change your life around
14:15i should have never dragged you out for drinks man
14:17i mean you wouldn't have gotten drugged and knocked up a stranger
14:20a little over two grand a month with two kids
14:26girl that does not sound too stable to me
14:29how do you know that he's not using you
14:31he's pretty cute
14:32and the kids
14:33abby
14:34they're a boy and a girl
14:36fraternal twins
14:37they remind me of
14:39my babies
14:41cas
14:44you can't say that out loud ever okay
14:46he's just gonna think you're trying to replace the kids you lost
14:49he won't trust you
14:50yeah
14:51anyway where's the ring
14:53any honeymoon plans
14:55come on we can't afford any of that
14:57girl no
14:58stand up for yourself okay
14:59tell him you want to go shopping right now
15:02shopping
15:02text him
15:04if he's not spending his money on you
15:06he's just gonna be spending it on someone else
15:08you know what
15:09you know what
15:09there is a little something that i want
15:13gold digger
15:20i knew it
15:22she's showing her two colors now
15:23i do think this is really pretty
15:27affordable too
15:28and
15:29okay
15:29yeah i'll take both
15:32so
15:35you're picking something out for the kids
15:38yes
15:39i wanted a gift for him
15:40you know
15:41it's my first time being a mom in all
15:43i wanted to
15:43go with a bang
15:45that'll be twelve hundred dollars please
15:48twelve hundred dollars
15:51for
15:52did i get a discount
15:54i did get two
15:55but i won't get one
15:56no
15:57we don't do that around here
15:59come on
16:01work with me here
16:03i actually work here too
16:04right around the corner
16:04lita's luxury shoes
16:05ever heard of it
16:06so you
16:07you throw me a bone here
16:08i'll hook you up next time
16:10you come into the stock
16:11yeah
16:11i'll throw in a
16:12free pair of heel projectors
16:13like that
16:13it's only twelve hundred dollars
16:17i mean if you can't afford it
16:18you don't need to waste my time
16:20are you taking them or not
16:22yeah
16:25yeah
16:26i'm taking them
16:28i'll take them
16:29they do do distance right now
16:36uh
16:37yeah birthdays
16:37holidays
16:38stuff like that
16:38although it's not my birthday
16:39so that's a
16:40long shot
16:41mommy
16:42mommy
16:43mommy
16:43mom you've got the paper
16:44and you'll take
16:45children like a gift
16:46thank you
16:48what about this one over here
16:52it looks nice
16:54doesn't it
16:54of course it's nice
16:56it's a hundred fifty thousand dollars
16:58a hundred and fifty thousand dollars
17:03for that
17:04my mom
17:05would like to try
17:06it on
17:07oh
17:09if you can't afford to buy it
17:11you can't afford to try it on
17:13i can be held responsible if you damage such a precious
17:16you
17:17daddy can you keep waiting for mommy
17:22okay sweetie heart
17:24i'll buy it
17:25i'll buy it
17:27i'm so sorry charity i seem to have left my wallet at home
17:34sir
17:34if you'd like some other options
17:37there's a goodwill right around the corner
17:39that might be more of your scene
17:41i'm doubting my father
17:45because you think he can't afford it
17:47what's going on here
17:49mr richard
17:50sir
17:50hello mr richards
17:52my wife here was
17:55looking at the rings over there
17:57in this locker right here
17:58but
17:58i seem to have forgot my wallet at home
18:00you guys do discounts for birthdays right
18:02just so happens to be my birthday today
18:05i was hoping
18:08you get that discount
18:11okay you know what will let's just call it
18:21if this is half off we couldn't afford it
18:22let alone some birthday discount
18:23uh killian
18:24what
18:25what was that
18:26what
18:27the necklace everything is free
18:30don't worry about it you have to pay
18:31no
18:32uh we'll even throw in the uh rings for the kiddos
18:35yes
18:36oh
18:37uh you enjoy your birthday
18:39right
18:40free
18:40yes
18:41thank you so much
18:44thank you charity
18:44you have yourself a fantastic birthday
18:46oh
18:46yeah
18:47thank you
18:47yes
18:48thank you
18:50hope to see you soon
18:51what's that
18:52sir
18:53what the hell
18:55how could you give away all of that for free richard
18:58are you the stupidest person in this entire ball that was killian steinwell the wealthiest man
19:07in all of winchester you know when the recession happened he kept this entire company alive and your salary
19:13i can keep up to hold that store everything for him
19:16she'll be right with you sir
19:19oh my god we got all of that for free you just gave us up that is quite the birthday discount if i've ever seen one i'm gonna come back every year it's settled
19:30wait why'd you take that off
19:34well it's expensive
19:36i want to keep it in pristine condition for when charity grows up i think she's gonna love it one day
19:41right
19:42yeah
19:43it was only 150,000 dollars i got it for you
19:46keep it
19:47did you just say only 150,000 dollars
19:51what do you think you are some sort of billionaire that was crazy that was a crazy statement
19:56anyway
19:57who wants to see what i got for you two
19:59me
20:00yes yes yes
20:01all right
20:01all right it's right in here ready
20:04necklaces here i'll put them on you guys ready
20:07ready
20:09thank you
20:11oh nice
20:12that birthmark on his collarbone
20:15one for charity
20:18yes
20:20oh charity has the birthmark too
20:24congrats mama
20:27it's a boy and a girl
20:28they're beautiful
20:30and they both have the same heart-shaped birthmark on their collarbone just like you
20:34they both have the heart-shaped birthmark
20:38oh
20:40where'd you get the kids
20:43get the kids
20:45from their mom what do you think i popped them out
20:52right
20:54right
20:55right uh so where is their mom now
20:58uh
20:59the ex-wife
21:01she moved to europe after the divorce we gave a fashion designer
21:08stop it cassandra
21:10of course they have a mom your bio kids died seven years ago
21:14oh
21:16hi
21:22miss mortensen you booked an appointment with us today to look at a three-bedroom apartment
21:26yeah sure sure yeah we'll be right over
21:29whoo all right who wants to go see our new apartment
21:33you
21:37wait wait wait hold on our new apartment like the four of us living together
21:42yeah
21:43come on it's kind of being married if we're not sharing expenses
21:47trust me it is much cheaper to rent as a couple
21:50but i am going to try to talk the realtor down a little bit price-wise i'm going to need all three of your helps
21:56all right listen up anytime she asks you any question this is what i'm gonna need i'm gonna need all of you to be like
22:02hmm i don't know
22:04like i don't think about that i'm not sure
22:05stuff like that to talk her down
22:07got it thumbs up
22:09got it
22:09all right
22:11yeah
22:11let's go
22:12what'd you think about the apartment
22:18uh yeah i mean it's okay
22:20it's just the master bedroom's a little small for us
22:24all right you said it was four thousand a month
22:27right
22:28that's just i don't know it's a bit out of our budget
22:31right
22:32well
22:33oh right
22:39right
22:39yeah
22:40yeah it's what 800 square feet
22:42i mean how the hell is anyone supposed to live in a place like that
22:45yeah
22:46the living room is smaller than the guest bedroom at home
22:49and the kitchen doesn't even have a private shelf
22:52it's a three bedroom for four thousand right in winchester city
22:59if you're gonna act like that then i'm sorry
23:01but i can't help you
23:03nobody can
23:04have a great day
23:07no i
23:08i told you guys to be really picky not insane
23:14great great that's awesome we just we don't have a place to live but that's okay we can
23:19come get your tent
23:21don't worry it's all money we have tons of houses all over the world
23:29like in france
23:30okay buddy
23:33i told you those are monopoly houses not real houses right
23:37we can't actually live there this is real life
23:40okay i was looking at some properties too actually you want to go check them out
23:46well yeah yeah let's go
23:49you did it
23:55come on kids let's go
23:56whoa
23:59wow okay so
24:02this is a four bedroom for only three thousand a month
24:08uh it's two thousand actually
24:10is someone murdered here why is it so cheap
24:14why is it only two thousand a month
24:21uh it's my ex-boss's place he's renting it out to us
24:26he's very picky about who he rents it out to
24:28let's see they have to be married
24:31no single renters
24:33no one over the age of 34
24:35they have to have kids
24:37twins specifically
24:39a boy and a girl
24:40yeah
24:41yeah that's it
24:43um and we check all those boxes so that's why he's giving us such a good deal on it
24:46yeah
24:47wow
24:48wow
24:50and we get all of this
24:59uh-huh
25:01yeah
25:01yeah
25:02all
25:03all ours
25:04we get to move in here today
25:05if we want
25:06i mean new homes new beginnings i guess
25:12i'm gonna go ahead and i'm gonna make you guys something super special for dinner
25:15oh come on dad let's help mommy
25:20where's charity at
25:23what's that teamwork
25:43hold on
25:43oh come home
25:49thank you mommy
25:56it tastes so good
25:58and it looks so good
25:59wow
26:00these do look good
26:02that's it
26:04that's it
26:06those are for the kids
26:07okay
26:08just
26:10whatever they don't finish
26:12i'm gonna whip up and turn to a pasta
26:14all right trust me it's gonna be good
26:16you sure
26:16yes i mean sure
26:18see
26:20i told you they wouldn't have it all
26:23cass i didn't know you could cook so good
26:26i can do more than just cook
26:27um
26:28sewing
26:29home repairs
26:30change a tire
26:31i can do it all
26:33where'd you learn to do all that
26:36what'd you have a job or something
26:38not exactly
26:39no
26:40okay if you want to learn any life skills
26:42all you have to do is
26:44a
26:45have your mom die when you're really young
26:47b
26:47have your dad remarry
26:49and c
26:49have that person he remarries
26:51be an evil evil stepmother
26:53uh just do all of that
26:54and i guarantee you
26:55you will have life skills
26:56faster than you think
26:58mommy that's what happened with cinderella right
27:02does that mean you're cinderella
27:04and that's the same thing that happened with prince charming
27:09does that mean you're prince charming
27:11honestly yeah when you put it like that
27:15that kind of is us
27:16i mean just there's everything with the shoes and your driver
27:19that's cute
27:21it's more than enough to let the light
27:24all right prince charming
27:25i'm gonna go get the dishes
27:26ah
27:27you sit down princess
27:29i'll be doing the dishes around here
27:32don't let it be
27:34hi
27:38i
27:39i
27:39marriage certificate right here
27:41so i am married
27:43can i have my commission
27:45you're married
27:46that's even better
27:49a secret
27:52i don't like my relationship
27:54spicy
27:56say yes to me
27:59and you get
28:00your commission
28:01you get some
28:02behave yourself
28:04mr simon
28:04i'm recording the whole thing right here
28:06if my husband sees that he's not gonna be happy
28:08oh yeah
28:10i heard that he's some driver
28:12and he has two kids
28:14those puttos mocosos
28:17when you become a real
28:20winner
28:21to be romantic
28:24we were meant to be?
28:30what are you?
28:31some kind of wacko
28:32fucking fortune teller?
28:34so what?
28:35you are poor taxi driver
28:36i don't need to read
28:38to start sighing
28:39to know that you are dying in poverty
28:42huh
28:44funny
28:45i'm a bit of a fortune teller myself
28:47and right now
28:48my fortune
28:49is saying your future
28:50looks pretty grim
28:51cause in about five minutes
28:53i'm gonna beat this shit out of you
28:55and you're gonna lose your job
28:56i need to make a phone call
29:06i need to make a phone call
29:06i'll hear if you need a finger
29:11you never get to commission now
29:16you are fired
29:17i'm suing you
29:18for my medical bills
29:20just your way
29:21cassandra
29:21i'll ruin you
29:23hey boss
29:27what's that
29:29what?
29:32i am fired
29:33wait wait
29:35no no no
29:36are you actually a fortune teller?
29:41because now it's insane
29:42no i dabbled in it
29:43here and there
29:44oh
29:44make hence me
29:45wow
29:46that's crazy
29:47well
29:48could you tell me
29:50when that 80k is gonna hit my account?
29:52because i could use that right now
29:54let me show you a magic trick
29:56i'd say you'd see it right
30:01about
30:03now
30:05check your bank account
30:06okay
30:09i'll check my bank account
30:10oh my god
30:13it's all there
30:1480k
30:14it's in my bank account
30:15it's right
30:15it is right
30:16what?
30:18i can't believe you're so excited
30:20over a mere 80k
30:21um
30:22did you just say a mere
30:2480k?
30:25that is so much money
30:26do you have any idea
30:27how much money that is?
30:29i'll instruct
30:29gold will
30:30yeah
30:34i was working under
30:37one of my family businesses
30:38i'll get her job
30:39all sorted out
30:40thanks bro
30:42you know you treat her
30:43awfully well
30:44for one of those
30:45contract marriages
30:46oh don't tell me
30:49you caught feelings for her
30:50oh you still got that scar
30:53huh
30:54tell you what
30:56drop by the hospital
30:57at some point
30:58and i'll get dermatology
30:59to fix it up
30:59right for you
31:00sir
31:01thanks
31:03no way
31:07you moved in with him
31:08okay how's married life girl
31:10stop
31:10stop
31:11it's not like that
31:12okay
31:12it's a contract marriage
31:13we don't even sleep
31:14in the same bedroom
31:14oh my god
31:15jeez
31:15cas
31:16come on
31:17don't tell me
31:17you're too shy
31:18to make a move
31:18you really have to
31:20get back out there
31:21i mean
31:21you literally
31:22haven't been with
31:23anyone else
31:24since that one guy
31:24from like seven years ago
31:26come on
31:27do you really not
31:29remember anything at all
31:30nothing
31:32please
31:33i mean with how drunk
31:34i was at night
31:35i can't even remember
31:35his face
31:36damn
31:38okay i mean
31:39there's one thing
31:40about him i remember
31:40but it's small
31:41it's minor
31:42oh my god
31:42tell me
31:43what is it
31:43he had like
31:45um
31:45like a scar
31:48right at the bottom
31:49of his abs
31:50oh
31:51it's
31:53something
31:53I fucking
31:54want
31:54oh
31:54oh
31:57hey
32:00uh
32:00are the kids
32:03worried
32:03are the kids asleep
32:05sorry
32:05the kids
32:07yeah
32:07i just
32:08read them a bedtime
32:08story
32:09and yeah
32:10they're asleep
32:10cool
32:11um
32:12you know
32:14i'm just gonna go to bed
32:15i'm gonna go to the guest room
32:16okay
32:17good
32:18sleep tight
32:19okay
32:21both go to the right
32:24yeah
32:25all right
32:26one two three
32:27okay
32:27wait
32:28he's such a straight-laced man
32:31he doesn't even know how to flirt
32:33and that's
32:34his wife
32:35seems like he needs our help
32:38again
32:40i'm gonna go this way
32:45yeah
32:45mommy
32:46hey
32:47mommy
32:48can we sleep with you tonight
32:50yes
32:50please mom
32:52chance
32:52charity
32:52what are you doing
32:53i'm just predicting your bedtime story
32:54you need to be asleep
32:55well
32:56you know what
32:57why don't i just take the big bed with them
33:00and you can live in the guest room tonight
33:02all right
33:02that sounds good
33:03thanks
33:04all right
33:05no
33:06daddy
33:07you two
33:08i can't do that
33:09i have to be up early tomorrow
33:10guys
33:11go to bed with mom
33:12daddy
33:12just this once
33:13daddy please
33:15i'll be once
33:25they fall asleep
33:26it won't be long
33:27if daddy gets cold
33:43he'll snuggle up with mommy
33:45just like a real couple
33:46yeah
33:47holy shit
34:14those pecs
34:16and those abs
34:19oh i cannot be having those thoughts about him
34:23wait
34:25how come he has a scar there too
34:27what are you doing
34:35cassandra what are you doing here
34:38this wasn't a part of the deal
34:40we were supposed to put the kids to sleep
34:41not be sleeping here
34:42together
34:43what am i doing
34:45you're under my blanket right now mister
34:48oh
34:51chance
34:53oh
34:53get in here right now
34:54stop yelling it then
34:56they were probably cold
34:57besides
34:59you're my husband now
35:02means i can do whatever i want with you
35:05including sleeping in the same bed
35:08are you trying to take advantage of me right now
35:11i think they're gonna kiss
35:14all right you two
35:17let's do some breakfast in those bellies
35:18let's go
35:23this mattress is so uncomfortable
35:26i can't sleep on this
35:28boris
35:33boris
35:34yeah you remember that ninety thousand dollar mattress
35:37send one to my new place
35:40thanks
35:41um what
35:52is all this
35:54um
35:56this
35:57is an old mattress that i found downstairs
35:59i figured i'd try to salvage it
36:00because
36:01we're trying to save money where we can't right
36:02yeah
36:03yeah
36:04cool lucky find
36:05awesome
36:06oh
36:09is this a constantine
36:10these watches are like 200 grand
36:14why do you have a watch this expensive
36:16and why do you have a watch that expensive
36:20uh
36:21sorry about that
36:22this is actually fake
36:23i still wear it because
36:25i'm a chauffeur and i have to look the part
36:27but this is only like 50 bucks
36:29this is only 50 bucks
36:31oh
36:33man it looks really real
36:35oh
36:36oh you have to get me one
36:39yes
36:41yes
36:41see i have this friend
36:42her birthday's coming up
36:43and she's obsessed with watches
36:44usually the fakes are like crazy expensive
36:46though please
36:47please
36:47uh
36:48yes
36:48i don't think that's a good idea
36:50i mean this is a fake watch
36:51you don't want to give your friend a fake watch
36:53but i'm not gonna get her one
36:54i'm gonna get her five
36:55yeah yeah yeah
36:56i'll send you the money
36:57okay don't even worry about that
36:58just
36:58take care of getting the watches
37:00doesn't even have to be a constantine
37:01anything that they have
37:02rolex
37:03um
37:03whatever
37:04she loves them all
37:05if they look as good as this does
37:06she's gonna love it
37:09thank you
37:10uh-huh
37:13yeah
37:14all right so you guys go ahead and take this
37:21with my ice cream
37:23i'll meet you guys there okay
37:26welcome to legal's luxury shoes
37:35can i help
37:35cassandra
37:38what are you doing here
37:40i can't believe you're working customer service
37:42how the mighty's fallen
37:44you should have told us
37:46that way we could have laughed in your face sooner
37:48i bet you're regretting going no contact with us when you did
37:51you know what yeah i do regret that
37:54i wish i had left that hellhole sooner
37:57that's what i wish
37:58yeah
38:02dad just bought me a new villa last week
38:04jealous
38:05excuse me
38:07ma'am
38:08are you going to purchase anything
38:10because the door is right over there
38:12if not feel free to use it
38:13of course i'm going to buy something
38:16and i want you to serve me
38:20personally
38:24quick
38:27charity
38:28poor daddy
38:29tell him mommy's getting bullied
38:30come on
38:31okay these are from our curated collection
38:36i think you'll really like them
38:38get them
38:39i want you to put them on my feet
38:42sure thing ma'am
38:47mm-hmm
38:47oh
38:50look at you
38:51we came from the same family
38:53went to the same fashion school
38:55and now look at us
38:57i'm a hot couture designer
38:59and
39:00you're putting on my shoes for me
39:02like a little maid
39:03oh
39:04vanessa
39:06get me something else
39:13i don't like them
39:15right away
39:19these might be more to your taste
39:30these are handcrafted in italy
39:32typically reserved for our vip clients
39:34this pink pair
39:36in particular
39:37is a one-of-a-kind
39:38unique design
39:39so
39:40oh
39:45that's more like it
39:52yeah you like them
39:53we do also have those in purple
39:54they are also part of our premium collection
39:56with a price tag to match
39:58eight thousand dollars
39:59of course that shouldn't be a problem for you
40:02right
40:02you are a hot couture designer
40:04of course
40:06i have the money
40:07i'll just pick whichever pair i like more
40:10just give me one second
40:15okay
40:15all right
40:16what are you doing
40:19i'm just
40:20i'm helping
40:20there
40:22okay i just sent a poll to our entire high school
40:24right
40:24ran into vanessa mortensen at leto's luxury shoes
40:27help her decide between these two pairs of ultra high-end heels
40:30she can't afford them both
40:31oh my god the results are already coming in
40:33people are already voting
40:34that's crazy
40:35they love them
40:38vanessa
40:38oh you really should get both
40:40unless you really can't afford them
40:41money's not a problem
40:47awesome
40:48pack them up
40:49great so that'll be eight thousand for the purple pair and ten thousand for those pink ones right there
40:55awesome how would you like to pay cash or card
40:57great that was more than a month's worth of commission for me thank you so much
41:06i really do hope to see you again yourself
41:08get out of my way
41:12okay
41:16hey are you okay
41:16are you okay
41:17i'm fine
41:18i'm fine
41:19you're fine
41:19let go of me you psycho
41:25you can harass me
41:27harass me
41:29even assault me
41:30but you touch these kids again
41:32and i will kill you
41:34bitch
41:34what are you gonna do about it
41:37i'm the customer
41:38i can do whatever i want
41:39you better back off or i'll get you fired
41:42you better back off or i'll get you fired
41:46yeah go ahead
41:47i already got my commission
41:48and my bonus payout anyway
41:50what is that supposed to mean
41:51that mean
41:53i don't have to hold you back
41:59just you wait
42:06cassandra mortinson
42:08hi baby boy
42:13okay are you okay
42:14you're okay
42:14i'm totally fine
42:16what are you doing here
42:19charity told me that there was a damsel in distress in here but
42:22looks like miss damsel has it under control
42:28i'm sorry
42:29i let chance get hurt today
42:32how you doing buddy
42:34i'm fine daddy
42:36it doesn't hurt anymore
42:37see
42:38he's alright
42:40one more thing
42:41i uh
42:42i kind of quit my job
42:45just now
42:46what why'd you do that
42:48you're the kind of person who got married just to get a bonus
42:51why'd you quit so fast
42:53she went after the kids
42:55well that's where i draw the line
42:57i got bullied a lot when i was their age
43:02i don't want that for them
43:04well i mean there's plenty of other jobs out there right
43:06hey
43:08i'll pick up some more hours and meet the town
43:11here
43:14you can use this for now
43:17i'm the guy let me take care of things for a bit
43:24oh wow
43:26so mysterious so cool acting like a ceo over there
43:30i know right
43:31i might just treat myself to a fancy dinner
43:35tonight
43:36hey
43:36i'm kidding
43:37don't get carried away
43:38i'm kidding
43:39don't
43:40that was really sweet
43:41thank you
43:42so much for three years of work
43:46i guess i never really came to my chip store
43:49what's this
43:50nothing
43:52no it's just something i scribbled
43:54when i was born to work
43:55cassandra these are professional
43:58you have a real talent for this
44:00why don't you work at a fashion studio
44:02i did go to fashion school you know
44:05best in the country actually
44:08but uh
44:11senior year somebody stole my designs
44:13and i got kicked out for plagiarism
44:16blacklisted from all the major crash analysis
44:19what
44:21it was like seven years ago
44:23i'm over it i promise
44:24it's done
44:25oh damn i mean every time you talk about your life
44:27it just gets worse and worse you know
44:29okay and what are you getting so worked up about
44:32it's my life i'm fine with it
44:34besides
44:35i might not have ever met you
44:37or the kids if i was
44:39i was still in school you know
44:41you know there's got to be some company out there
44:43that doesn't care about your education
44:45how about ys house
44:48ys house
44:50yeah
44:51why don't you treat your luck there at least
44:53hey
44:55what's the worst that could happen
44:57boris
45:06call the director down at ys house
45:08and set an appointment up
45:09for a miss
45:10cassandra mortensen
45:11oh sure
45:13i didn't know they were hired
45:14they're hiring now
45:16oh my god
45:21will
45:23will
45:25will i got the job at ys house
45:27i got it
45:27she'll be thinking they're dead not them
45:38i think somebody is jealous
45:42me
45:43oh you're talking about me
45:45yeah
45:46yeah
45:46dallas
45:46yeah dallas
45:47dallas
45:48dallas
45:48dallas
45:49dallas
45:50oh my god
45:51thank you
45:57are you sure your boss is cool with you taking his car like that
46:05hey boss
46:06sorry for running late
46:08traffic
46:09boss
46:10sorry i thought you said you were a driver
46:14ha ha ha ha good one boss
46:16this is horace
46:18the ceo's assistant
46:19that's right
46:22i i am the ceo's assistant
46:23yes and i'm the driver
46:25and you are the driver
46:26yeah
46:26of course
46:27well i guess i'll let you
46:28drive
46:29yeah let me drive us to work
46:31you can sit in the back seat
46:33i'll sit in the back
46:34you drive
46:34william
46:36yes
46:37that's my name
46:38yeah
46:38you're gonna have such a good first day
46:41what are we doing
46:44play along
46:45just play along
46:46hey wait wait wait
46:51you didn't like
46:52pull any strings
46:54to get me into ys house
46:55pull strings
46:57yeah
46:57come on cass
46:58the only thing i know how to pull is uh
47:00is the clutch
47:02no you got the job
47:04cause you're good enough
47:05alright
47:06let's go
47:08space
47:14is the conference room
47:15and here is the common space
47:17where everybody is
47:18hi everyone
47:20my name is cassandra mortensen
47:21i'm starting today
47:22cassandra mortensen
47:25wow
47:27didn't expect you to show up here
47:29vanessa
47:31what are you doing here
47:34that's what i should be asking you
47:35bitch
47:36of course i'd end up working with my college dropout cheating sister
47:40that's right
47:41her sister plagiarized her senior project and got kicked out
47:43don't want to show her to that shitty boutique at the mall
47:46if any of you have a problem with me being here
47:49take it up with the hiring manager
47:51because i am not leaving
47:53get in room ladies
47:54mr laurel is coming in soon
47:56cassandra
47:57i want you sitting in
47:58to learn how we run things around here okay
48:01mr laurel is our newest client
48:04he's worked with all the top fashion houses in france
48:07so just stay out of the way
48:08and don't mess this up for everyone
48:10hmm
48:10to be honest
48:18i'm a bit disappointed with your designs today
48:21i expect it better
48:23sir my designs are based off monet's water lilies
48:27the colors
48:28yes yes yes monet
48:30it's always flowers and pictures with you people
48:33don't you know anything else about france
48:35i have something else sir
48:38shut it idiot
48:40i'd like to see it
48:42but i'm warning you
48:44don't disappoint me
48:46um this piece i call out of the cannon
48:49out of the cannon
48:53my apologies sir
48:56my sister
48:56she's new
48:57she technically shouldn't even be here
48:59because she was kicked out of fashion school for plagiarism
49:01oh really
49:04no no i never plagiarized
49:07although this is actually inspired by other people's work
49:12this is inspired by other people's work
49:17the parisian street artists
49:22sometimes the best art isn't found in a museum
49:25it's all around you
49:27especially in a city as unique and vibrant as paris
49:30i feel like it's important for people to stop and
49:33take a look at what's going on around them
49:35out of the cannon
49:37the spray can
49:38that is a fantastic idea
49:41the best one i've heard all day
49:43why wasn't it with the others
49:44oh that's my fault
49:46i turned it in late
49:47that's all right
49:48you obviously know french culture
49:50you don't also have to know wines
49:53don't
49:54well let's just say i have quite the collection
49:57and you know a glass of wine here or there
49:59helps when you need a little inspiration
50:01i'm last
50:04someone who understands me
50:05quite the collection huh
50:07cass
50:07well how about this
50:09how about you have mr the rolled over tonight
50:11we'll all tag along to see where you get all your inspiration from
50:14i'm sure you'd love to have us over right
50:17oh
50:18you know well the thing
50:19that is a brilliant idea i'd love to see how you work sondra
50:25oh so it's settled
50:27i'll see you at six
50:29i would love to see how you pull this one off in your shitty one bedroom shack
50:36will
50:42hey
50:43mommy
50:43daddy's on the worst trip
50:45did you need anything
50:46all right
50:47chance
50:48charity
50:48listen up
50:49um
50:50here's the deal
50:51mommy has got a
50:53really
50:53really big
50:55client
50:55who wants to come over to our house tonight
50:57at 6 p.m. with a lot of people in there expecting
50:59fancy wine
51:00and dinner
51:01guess what
51:02we don't have any of that
51:04so
51:04i'm gonna need your help right now
51:05i'm gonna need your help whenever everybody shows up tonight
51:07i'm gonna need you to pretend like nobody's home
51:09and i'm gonna need you to not open the door under any circumstances
51:12got it
51:15okay
51:15thank you
51:17does mom need their help again
51:20yes indeed charity
51:23and we're not six anymore
51:25we're seven
51:26it's time to get to work
51:32hello
51:33this is margaret
51:35our new mommy
51:36needs your help
51:38all right everyone
51:45attention please
51:47we only have one hour to work
51:49so let's get to work
51:50come on run
51:57what's up
51:57i guess i'm kidding
51:59that was
51:59oh you're right
52:00and i'm gonna go for 10k
52:02on the top of you
52:04sparkling in both day
52:05on the side
52:06and don't even bother
52:07or anything
52:08on their 2k
52:08got that
52:09where did you want this antique
52:11balls and plates
52:12and a kitchen of course
52:13what would you like this matisse
52:14i'm gonna add a few more holes
52:16next to the japanese watercolors
52:18got that
52:18mom's gonna be very surprised
52:22she's gonna love it
52:24oh man
52:30gosh
52:31it looks like nobody's home
52:32and i don't have my keys
52:34so
52:34welcome home
52:35mommy
52:36yeah let's do it
52:42cas what is this
53:01a home goods
53:02please
53:04a fake matisse
53:05it's true
53:07daddy got it
53:09an auction
53:09don't lie
53:11rat
53:11lying makes you ugly
53:13well
53:15where's your wine collection
53:17for mr larold
53:18and collection
53:18for mr larold
53:19oh mr larold
53:22a pleasure
53:23to meet you
53:24mommy mentioned
53:25you have a great taste
53:26in wine
53:27feel free
53:28to look around
53:29and tell me
53:30if there's something
53:31you like
53:31what is all this
53:34you just slapped a bunch
53:36of fake labels
53:37on these
53:37didn't you
53:38i can't even pronounce
53:39half of them
53:40that's not
53:41that's right
53:42mr larold
53:43this is larold carton
53:46charlemont
53:47and this one is
53:49chateau
53:50lafitte
53:511988
53:53this one of course
53:55is ronet
53:56conti
53:57vintage
53:58limited edition
53:59sold
54:00at auction
54:01for
54:0118,000
54:03you're a dirty little liar
54:05just like your stepmom
54:06hey watch it
54:07vanessa
54:07oh
54:09and you're
54:10the ugly witch
54:11who has no idea
54:12what you're talking about
54:13oh let me change that
54:15monster
54:15why you
54:18i can't believe it
54:20this is the real deal
54:22i didn't realize
54:26you had such a collection
54:27it's incredible
54:28but this still seem
54:30a bit fancy
54:30for a casual gathering
54:32like this
54:33don't worry
54:34mr larold
54:35mom picked out
54:36this one special
54:37we actually have
54:39plenty more in storage
54:40uh-huh
54:42ma'am
54:43of course
54:44how did the kids
54:45just pull us off
54:46did will put them up
54:47to the
54:48i'm so excited
54:53yes enjoy
55:01excuse me
55:01where did you guys get this
55:09me and charity
55:10wanted at a raffle
55:12raffle
55:13we
55:14there was a promotion
55:15at the mall
55:16and they just gave it to us
55:18come on cassandra
55:20come on cassandra
55:20yeah
55:24come in
55:25we
55:26we
55:27we
55:29we
55:32we
55:32we
55:32we
55:33we
55:34we
55:35we