- 7/16/2025
Madea crashes a destination wedding, bringing her signature chaos, humor, and heart. Get ready for unexpected twists and non-stop laughs in this 2025 comedy!
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😹
FunTranscript
00:00I don't have a problem with you.
00:02Ms. Brown, did you pay for them great?
00:04You know that stealing, right?
00:05The Bible says taste and see.
00:06If I pay for them, then it'd be pay and see.
00:09And anyway, they grow out the ground.
00:10The Lord bought them.
00:11They should be free anyway.
00:12You know what?
00:13Well, just hurry up, y'all.
00:14Let's just hurry up and get to the car.
00:15Cora, why are you so nerdy?
00:16What is you shaking for?
00:17What the hell wrong with you?
00:18Well, then y'all act like y'all don't know
00:19that this neighborhood is bad.
00:21Cora, do you not know I've been coming to this grocery
00:23store since you was a little?
00:25Since you was smart?
00:26What?
00:27Since she was, since time?
00:29I've been coming to this grocery store
00:30since you was a little infantile baby girl.
00:31Yeah?
00:32You know what?
00:32Come on, y'all.
00:33We just need to hurry up and get to the car, OK?
00:35Cora, what is wrong with you?
00:36But then you need to start coming to this store
00:37during the daytime.
00:38Cora, I'm not coming up here with all them elderly people,
00:40driving slow, can't see, knocking things over in hell.
00:43I'm not doing that.
00:44Look, now you're elderly, too.
00:45Cora, I'm not elderly.
00:46But who the hell you calling elderly?
00:47You're in your 80s.
00:48You're elderly.
00:49Now, I'm still fine.
00:50Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:51Hey, wait a minute.
00:52I want you to define fine because you don't look fine to me.
00:54What?
00:55Beauty's in the eye to behold, and my eyes ain't beholding nothing.
00:59Baby, don't let them get over clothes.
01:00And if you keep them long enough, they come back in style.
01:02You're right.
01:03Look at me.
01:04Look at me.
01:04Hold on.
01:05Brown, don't help me.
01:06Don't help me at all.
01:07Why?
01:08Let's just get in the car, my dear.
01:09Come on, now.
01:09Let's put the groceries in the car.
01:10That's why Cora got me in for security.
01:12I'm secure.
01:13Y'all get them, put stuff out security.
01:14Brown, you stand there looking like a whole bunch of damn colors.
01:18You look like a suit that say, rob me.
01:20I'm easy.
01:20Doesn't that dress look like you say, milk me?
01:22I'm easy to be milk.
01:23Chocolate, number 2% milk.
01:25Go get in the car.
01:26You ain't got to bring the basket back.
01:28Let's get away.
01:29Leave the damn basket there.
01:30Somebody, ooh, ooh, ooh, part there.
01:32Oh, here.
01:33Can't take that out of nowhere.
01:35Give me that car.
01:36Give me that car.
01:37I'm nervous.
01:40Give me this.
01:41Where's the seatbelt?
01:42My car know how to wear it.
01:43You ain't have no seatbelt in this car.
01:46They had car seatbelts for whooping their ass back in the day.
01:49Well, I can't whooping no nothing of that tonight, but let's go.
01:53Wait a minute.
01:54Do I need to push?
01:56Whew.
01:57Wait a minute.
01:58No, where we going?
01:59We going to the gas station.
02:00I got to get some gas.
02:01Oh, my God.
02:02Carver, here.
02:03Hold on.
02:04Slow down.
02:05Wait a minute.
02:06Why did this turn?
02:07Oh, shit.
02:08Slow down, hell.
02:09I can't see that.
02:10OK.
02:11Look.
02:12Excuse me.
02:13Excuse me.
02:14Excuse me.
02:15I got to get some gas.
02:18Well, come out here.
02:19Just get on out the damn car.
02:20Get out of the car.
02:21Get out of the car.
02:22You ain't got no seatbelts in this drive.
02:23It's like most of my face.
02:24I'm going to use a seatbelt to beat the hell out of you.
02:26That's what I'm going to do.
02:27Jesus.
02:28Carver, get out.
02:29I can't even get out of this car.
02:30Go on up in there and pay for the gas for me.
02:31OK.
02:32So where's the money at?
02:33Carver, don't make me pimp you out.
02:34Go pay for the damn gas.
02:35I'm always paying for the money out.
02:37And you always going to get pimped out
02:38if you don't get the hell up in there.
02:39I need about $400.
02:40Ain't nobody finna feel that thing up.
02:41Sure ain't.
02:42Take $100,000.
02:43I'm going to put $2 on it.
02:45That's what I'm about.
02:46Give me $2 on pump, too.
02:53Oh, I know damn well.
02:54You ain't finna try to see about this.
02:56Is that something we're playing?
02:58Oh, that's a cue, Bill.
02:59That's a real cue.
03:00Go.
03:07Man, what are you doing?
03:08You crazy kid.
03:09Come out.
03:10What's the problem?
03:11What's the problem?
03:12What's the problem?
03:13What's the problem?
03:14What is the matter?
03:15What is the problem?
03:16What is the problem?
03:17What is the problem?
03:18Why are you running?
03:19Why are you running?
03:20Why are you running?
03:21Why are you running?
03:23Where are you running?
03:24Where are you running?
03:25Where are you running?
03:26Where are you running?
03:29Hold up.
03:30Hold up.
03:31What is going on?
03:34What is going on?
03:36What is going on?
03:40What happened?
03:44Let me get my chain!
03:45What in the world is going on?
03:48Everybody aware!
03:49Everybody aware, let me get my chain!
03:52Everybody get my chain!
03:53Let me get my chain!
03:55Let me get my chain!
03:56You're coming out!
03:58You're coming out!
03:59What I want to know is, why are we here in this fancy restaurant?
04:15What is this about?
04:16Tiffany wanted to talk to us about something.
04:18Well, when she wants to talk to us, we go to Red Lobster, so why are we here?
04:21Oh, no, I don't do that anymore, Brian.
04:24Oh, right.
04:25Yeah, you're a rich husband.
04:27Yeah, you're a rich, rich husband.
04:28Where is he?
04:29Ways away on business.
04:31Hmm.
04:31Oh, don't be jealous.
04:34Jealous?
04:35Mm-hmm.
04:35No, babe, I'm not jealous.
04:37Divorcing you was one of the best things I could have ever done.
04:41Can we at least just try to be sensible for tonight, please?
04:45Just for our daughter, we got one night.
04:47You're always so uptight.
04:49Yeah, I am uptight.
04:49You know why?
04:50Because their mom, who married some rich guy, comes in all the time and gives them all these
04:56great gifts.
04:56She's like the fairy godmother, but where was she when they were younger?
04:59When I was doing all the work, now she's here.
05:01Whatever this is, it better not be any drama, better not be any foolishness, okay?
05:05Oh, there's my son.
05:06Hey.
05:06Hi, Rob.
05:07Hi, Dad.
05:08Hey, son.
05:09Hey.
05:10What are you wearing?
05:12Oh, Tiff said dress up.
05:14Dad said it was okay, so I just threw on my old good things, you know?
05:19Looks great.
05:19This is my eighth grade.
05:20It still fits.
05:20Uh-huh.
05:21What's wrong with what he's wearing?
05:22Yeah.
05:23And, oh, and you brought your backpack.
05:26Yeah.
05:27See, a nice addition.
05:29What?
05:29Dad got it for me last week.
05:30Tiger to Teddy.
05:32Yeah.
05:33Actually, I really gotta go.
05:37I'm gonna use the lavatory.
05:39I have to tinkle.
05:39I've been holding this in all day.
05:41Dad, do you know where the-
05:42I think it's back there, son.
05:43Yeah.
05:43Oh, thanks, Dad.
05:44You gotta go, you gotta go.
05:45Right?
05:45Gotta go, gotta go.
05:46My boy.
05:48Okay.
05:49He's 19 years old, still walking around talking about Tinkle with a teddy bear on his backpack,
05:54Brian.
05:55Here we go with the judgment.
05:56Is that what you're doing?
05:57So you're bringing the judgment?
05:58Let's talk about judgment.
05:59Bring the judgment.
06:00I told you, let me spend some time with him so I could teach him about life.
06:04Did you forget the reason that I have custody?
06:07Did you forget that?
06:08My substance abuse was years ago, Brian.
06:11Yes, it was.
06:12At the time when both these kids needed you the most.
06:14Well, his daddy didn't teach you how to be a man, now did he?
06:17Vijay has a 4.0 GPA, okay?
06:19And he knows nothing about life at all.
06:21Are we really doing this in this restaurant?
06:23We're not gonna do that.
06:24Hi.
06:25Hey, sweetheart.
06:25Hey.
06:26How are you, honey?
06:27You aren't at it again, are you?
06:28No, no, not at all.
06:30We're fine.
06:31We're fine.
06:32Right, Brian?
06:33Dad?
06:36Who's this?
06:37Oh, you remember Xavier?
06:40No, I don't.
06:42No, I meant, I meant Mom.
06:43Right.
06:44You know what?
06:45Of course.
06:47Hey, Z, good to see you again.
06:48Z, yo, that shit on that boat?
06:50Shit on the boat.
06:52My husband was being so naughty.
06:54I'm sorry.
06:57Who are you?
06:58I'm your daughter's man.
06:59Yeah.
07:00Yeah.
07:00What's up?
07:02Xavier, but they call me Z.
07:04What's up, my nigga?
07:07What is happening right now?
07:08Hey, hey, what's up?
07:10Hey, what's up, VJ?
07:12Oh, okay.
07:13Z, hey, man.
07:15What's up, big man?
07:16Wait, wait, wait, wait.
07:17You know him, too?
07:18Oh, yeah.
07:19Mama introduced us last year, you know, summer vacation in Italy.
07:22It was pretty fun.
07:23Uh, so last summer?
07:25Yeah, yeah.
07:26Last summer, yeah.
07:26Well, that's when Tiffany and Z really hit it off, and now they're dating.
07:30Dating?
07:31This was four months ago, and I have not met him.
07:35Yeah, that's because I wanted to be sure.
07:39I'm sorry, be sure about what?
07:40Did you want to still date him?
07:42What, what?
07:43Shit, more than that, I'll be hitting that.
07:45Oh.
07:46Okay, stop it.
07:46What was that?
07:47He's emailing it.
07:49Wait, sorry, my dad.
07:53I'm trying to tell my dad.
07:54Wait, wait, what, what, what, what?
07:55Okay, okay, can we all just sit down so we can have dinner and discuss it, please?
07:59Yes.
08:00Come on, Z, come around here.
08:03Oh, goodness.
08:06Brian, come on, have a seat.
08:08Yeah, I just want to know, discuss what?
08:11What?
08:11Let me.
08:12Okay.
08:13Tiffany wanted us all to meet here so she could share something with you that I already know.
08:18Tiffany?
08:19Share something.
08:20What's happening?
08:22Xavier asked me to marry him, and I said...
08:25Yes.
08:27And I gave my blessing.
08:29And now all we need is yours.
08:31Yeah, we don't need it, but she would like it.
08:38Can I get mine?
08:39Yes.
08:40Well, Dad, say something.
08:47Brian?
08:48I, um, I think I left the doggy door locked, and we need to let the dog in.
08:54Wait, what?
08:55When did we get a dog?
08:56How did the dog y'all go?
08:57Dad!
08:58I'm allergic!
09:00What?
09:00Hey, go easy, my nigga.
09:03He doesn't look too well.
09:05Ah!
09:10Freeze, my!
09:11Blow your brains out if you move!
09:13Daddy, it's me, your son.
09:15I don't know you.
09:16Who the hell say I know you?
09:18Your mama done lied to you, said that I'm your daddy.
09:20Your mama done lied to you, said that I'm your daddy.
09:22I know you, my child.
09:23I know...
09:24Ow, man.
09:24Stop it.
09:25Oh.
09:26Yeah, you, my child.
09:27Sitting there whining like a little beard.
09:30Come on, Mabel.
09:31It's that boy that the condom broke on.
09:33Oh, hey, hey.
09:35Look at him.
09:36I didn't know who the hell was...
09:38What are you doing in the bushes?
09:40Look, they been bringing the house around here, but they come to this address, they gonna
09:42get gawked up in this piece.
09:45Why do you have an assault rifle and a gun?
09:47What am I missing?
09:48I'm the district attorney in this city.
09:49Good, then you can help us get off.
09:51Yeah, free me.
09:52In the club, I'll be free me.
09:56So I guess you really think that blood is thicker than the law?
09:59Hell yeah.
09:59Oh, it's gonna be thinner than these bullets when you layin' out here bleedin'.
10:03Uh, stitches get snitches, chickas.
10:06Stop it.
10:06Stop it.
10:07And what kind of guns are these?
10:08People are getting killed by guns every day.
10:10But guns ain't killin' people shit.
10:11People killin' people with the guns.
10:13That's right.
10:14You think I'm gonna sit in my house with a damn .22 when these fools around here got
10:17tech lines?
10:18I gotta meet power with power, baby.
10:20Ha ha.
10:20That's right.
10:20Ha ha ha ha.
10:21I hold it like this.
10:22Ha ha ha ha.
10:23I saw this on the TV.
10:24Ha ha.
10:25Tell you, as a Democrat, this is miracle.
10:27You understand, this is America, and my second, called dependent, codependent, something
10:32about a, something, something amendment.
10:34Something, one of them amendments say I can carry this gun.
10:37Do you even know what the second amendment says?
10:39Yes.
10:40It say I can shoot your black ass for sittin' on my porch, and I can stand my ground.
10:44That's my second amendment.
10:46Now, Brian, you know you need to call before you come over here, cause I would hate to have
10:49to bury your ass in the backyard like them other mans.
10:52You know accidents happen.
10:53I'm sorry, you would just stand there and shoot somebody for sitting on your porch?
10:57Basically.
10:58Hell, if I could bury the body, they can't find you.
11:00No face, no case.
11:04Why did I come over here?
11:05That's what hell we want to know.
11:08All right, now.
11:08Come on, tell me.
11:09Why'd you come over here?
11:10What is it?
11:10Apparently to be abused.
11:12And shocked.
11:13Ha ha ha.
11:13Double tap.
11:14Bam, bam.
11:14Ha ha ha.
11:16What's going on, boy?
11:17Tell us.
11:18Fine.
11:19Fine.
11:20The state can't get any worse.
11:21It's my kids.
11:23Oh, Lord.
11:24It's my...
11:25Okay, what's that look for?
11:28You two damn soft on them children, let them talk back and shit.
11:31Right, and that little boy?
11:33Yeah, he just like a daddy.
11:34He a little brrks, too.
11:35Yep, just like a daddy, a little brrks.
11:37You know what?
11:38I'm going home.
11:39Boss, set your sensitive ass down.
11:40Here.
11:41He's just talking to you.
11:42Well, hell, you know we believe in tough love around here.
11:44Don't come out here looking for no sympathy.
11:45We're going to laugh your ass right out the door if you're looking for sympathy.
11:48Ha ha ha ha ha.
11:49Life is hard.
11:50Get used to it.
11:51Suck it up.
11:51Oh, you think this is funny?
11:54Great.
11:54You think it's funny.
11:55I'm sorry.
11:55We've been smoking.
11:56Ha ha ha ha ha.
11:58Ha ha ha.
11:59Wee ha ha.
12:00If Coral had ever told me like your kids talk to you, I'd have been in the electrical chair.
12:04Hell no.
12:05Them children would have been dead.
12:06No, no.
12:06That's what I mean.
12:07I would have been in the electrical chair for killing them.
12:09That's what I'm saying.
12:10Okay, so what was I supposed to do?
12:11Beat them like you beat me?
12:12Look at you.
12:13You turned out great, didn't you?
12:14You're a little on the side, but you all right.
12:15You're a successful law-abiding citizen, better than we was.
12:19All right, listen, I just feel like I fail sometimes.
12:21Like I didn't raise my kids well, okay?
12:23I just didn't want to give them the beatings that you gave me.
12:26I didn't want them to be afraid of me.
12:27I wanted them to have the freedom and be able to express themselves and be able to do whatever
12:32they wanted to do, and you know what?
12:34Maybe if I had a better example as a fox.
12:38You about to get shot.
12:39You better shit up.
12:41Are you saying I'm the reason your damn children is jacked the hell up?
12:45You blaming me?
12:45Everybody want to blame the parent.
12:46What about that crackhead-ass mama?
12:48Well, there are psychologists that say...
12:50Don't be talking about no psychology, man.
12:52I made you a man.
12:53That's what I did.
12:54You need to beat them kids' ass before the police do.
12:56Look now, hell, it's taking too long.
12:58I'm getting tired.
12:58What these kids do now?
12:59I need to go in here and lay down.
13:00Now, Tiffany is getting married to some boy I just met.
13:06She's getting married?
13:06Who is this boy?
13:07Somebody I want to kill.
13:09Oh, Mabel, look who want to gun down.
13:12I don't know what to do.
13:13He's rude, he's disrespectful, and they want to get married in like two weeks.
13:16Two weeks?
13:17Yeah.
13:18Oh, hell.
13:19Oh, yeah, the rabbit died.
13:20She pregnant.
13:20She pregnant.
13:22No.
13:22Oh, hell, it's a shotgun wedding.
13:24No, no, he ain't got no shotgun.
13:26He ain't got no...
13:27He ain't got no...
13:28He ain't got no...
13:29Oh, I'm so high.
13:33What am I going to do?
13:34Go your ass home.
13:35Bring them back here tomorrow.
13:36I'm having fish fry.
13:37We're going to play a little cards.
13:38We're going to play a little space.
13:39And I'll talk to them in.
13:40So bring them back here tomorrow, okay?
13:42You hear me?
13:43You know what?
13:44That's not a bad idea.
13:45I know.
13:45I thought of it.
13:46Now get your ass home out of my house.
13:47Go home.
13:48Get your damn chair.
13:48But wait, I want to...
13:50I wasn't done talking.
13:56This is family.
13:58Jesus.
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