- 2 days ago
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00:00:00Oh, that beautiful blonde from Bashful Bend
00:00:04Never did learn to keep a friend
00:00:07She'd give him a start and shoot him in the end
00:00:10The beautiful blonde from Bashful Bend
00:00:13The yodel-ay, yodel-ay
00:00:15She's hardly the type to cuddle near
00:00:19She'd rather go out and rope a steer
00:00:22They never did build a school that she'd attend
00:00:25The beautiful blonde from Bashful Bend
00:00:28The yodel-ay, yodel-ay
00:00:30When she deals a poker hand
00:00:34You ought to see their faces
00:00:37Especially when she deals herself
00:00:40Approximately five aces
00:00:43I'ma bet my boot she'll meet some cuss
00:00:46Causing her heart to raise a fuss
00:00:49Then she'll fall in love
00:00:51And that'll be the end of the hard tootin'
00:00:53Free bootin', highfalutin', rude and tootin'
00:00:55Sick shootin', beautiful blonde
00:00:57From Bashful Bend
00:01:01The beautiful blonde from Bashful Bend
00:01:05That's right, Freddy
00:01:10Never wait too long between shots
00:01:12Or your finger might change its mind
00:01:14And shootin' ain't got nothin' to do with the mind
00:01:18It's all a matter of instinct
00:01:20There you go
00:01:22Pullin' the trigger again
00:01:24When all you got to do is close your hand gently
00:01:27Like you're squeezin' a sock full of dead mice
00:01:31That's better, baby
00:01:33Just like a bag of dead...
00:01:36That sticks
00:01:38Can I go play with my dolly now, Grandpa?
00:01:41You leave that dolly be
00:01:43And learn your lessons, Winifred
00:01:44Load up that gun
00:01:45Cause this is a rough country, little lady
00:01:48And the words they savvy best
00:01:49Is the words you say with that there thing
00:01:51Being a good shot ain't gonna get you in trouble
00:01:53It'll keep you out of trouble
00:01:55You ain't got a pappy or a mammy
00:01:57And I'm gettin' old
00:01:58And this is sudden country
00:02:00There's no tellin' where I'm goin' to be
00:02:02When you start to blossom out
00:02:03Into the flower of young womanhood
00:02:05I'll probably be up on the hill
00:02:07With just a couple of coyotes
00:02:09Howlin' over my grave
00:02:10To keep me company
00:02:11Then that there shootin' iron
00:02:13Has got to be your mammy
00:02:14And your pappy
00:02:15And your big brother
00:02:17So shoot, little lady
00:02:18Learn to shoot straight
00:02:21Quick!
00:02:22There we are
00:02:24Go on now
00:02:29Yes, sir
00:02:30That's Grandpa's good girl
00:02:35Now one for pappy
00:02:36Now one for mammy
00:02:41And one for big brother
00:02:47Fine
00:02:51Now one for the little boy
00:02:53Who lives down the lane
00:02:55Yes, sir
00:02:59We got the little boy
00:03:00Just where it done him the most good
00:03:02Yes, sir
00:03:03All you need now
00:03:05Is lots of practice
00:03:06And you'll be able to hold your own
00:03:08In this wicked old world
00:03:09Can I go press my dolly now, Grandpa?
00:03:12Yes, you can play with this dolly now
00:03:14Oh, motherless little Freddy
00:03:18What a shout
00:03:20Rock-a-bye, baby
00:03:23In the treetop
00:03:26When the wind blows
00:03:29The cradle will rock
00:03:32That beautiful blonde
00:03:34From Bashful Bend
00:03:36Never did learn to keep a friend
00:03:39She'd give him a start
00:03:40And shoot him in the end
00:03:42The beautiful blonde
00:03:43From Bashful Bend
00:03:45The yodely, yodely
00:03:46She's hardly the type
00:03:49To cuddle near
00:03:51She'd rather go out
00:03:52And rope a steer
00:03:54They never did build a school
00:03:56But she'd attend
00:03:57The beautiful blonde
00:03:58From Bashful Bend
00:03:59The yodely, yodely
00:04:01What are you talking about?
00:04:07This is a law-abiding town
00:04:08It ain't the Wild West
00:04:10People don't do things like this
00:04:12Without some reason behind it
00:04:13For heaven's sakes, Freddy
00:04:15You ought to have some kind of an idea
00:04:17How do I know?
00:04:18Those things just happen
00:04:19It can happen to anybody, that's all
00:04:21Well, it ain't so bad
00:04:23They say the first ten years
00:04:24Is kind of irritating
00:04:25But after that you get used to it
00:04:27They say, anyway
00:04:28What?
00:04:28But why did you shoot him, Freddy?
00:04:30I said, shoot
00:04:31If you wanted to get rid of him
00:04:33Couldn't you push him out a window
00:04:35Or down a well
00:04:36Or under a horse
00:04:37Or shoving him down a swamp
00:04:39From the back at midnight
00:04:40But, uh, but
00:04:42Why did you have to shoot
00:04:43The poor guy in the first place?
00:04:46I was jealous, I guess
00:04:48You know how girls are
00:04:54Do I?
00:04:55I was sitting at one table
00:04:57With a couple of suckers
00:04:58From the east
00:04:58Blackie was at the next table
00:05:00Giving me the fish eye
00:05:01Because we had a kind of a blow up
00:05:03Over this new jizzy
00:05:04That blew in
00:05:04Roulette, she calls herself yet
00:05:08Nothing serious
00:05:10But you can see me
00:05:11Getting sore about a number
00:05:12Like that one
00:05:13I wouldn't give her
00:05:14The satisfaction
00:05:15That Twilly
00:05:16Just minding my own business
00:05:19Hey, shall I give it to you?
00:05:24Draw it to you
00:05:25Will you excuse me, gentlemen?
00:05:34Maybe you do us a big flavor, Freddy
00:05:36In singing us a song
00:05:37That's what I get paid for
00:05:39So it can't be that big a flavor
00:05:40Will you excuse her, gentlemen?
00:05:42Feel me out, boys
00:05:43But don't forget me
00:05:44I'm possible
00:05:45Hurry back
00:05:46See you later
00:05:47Every time I meet you
00:05:52Sure
00:05:52Every time I meet you
00:06:16I meet you
00:06:18For the first time
00:06:21Just as though we never had met before
00:06:27Every time I kiss you
00:06:35I kiss you for the first time
00:06:41And my happy heart
00:06:44Keeps begging you
00:06:46For more
00:06:49Why, damn, my stocking, Sherry
00:06:54You escort me to my room, no?
00:06:55I'm afraid for all this man
00:06:57Well, uh
00:06:58I suppose so
00:07:00Every time I kiss you for the first time
00:07:02The moment is grand
00:07:04And the feeling is so brand new
00:07:09Every time you leave me
00:07:18Won't you take this far
00:07:23Along with you
00:07:28I've fallen in love for the first and the last time
00:07:37Every time I meet you
00:07:39Every time I meet you
00:07:41Every time I meet you
00:07:42I fall in love all over again
00:07:47Cause every time I meet you
00:07:52I meet you
00:07:55For the first time
00:07:57For the first time
00:07:59Just as though we never had met before
00:08:05Just as though we never had met before
00:08:10Every time I kiss you
00:08:14I kiss you
00:08:17For the first time
00:08:20And my happy heart
00:08:23Keeps begging you
00:08:25For more
00:08:27For more and more
00:08:30I'm begging you
00:08:32And every time
00:08:34You thrill me
00:08:36How you thrill me
00:08:39For the first time
00:08:42The moment is grand
00:08:45The feeling is so brand new
00:08:48The feeling is now
00:08:51Every time you leave me
00:08:59Won't you take this far
00:09:03Along with you
00:09:07I've fallen in love
00:09:12For the first and the last time
00:09:18True
00:09:20I've fallen in love
00:09:24For the first and the last time
00:09:26True
00:09:28There you are
00:09:56I remember my name, Rose.
00:10:00I see.
00:10:02Then you didn't actually mean to shoot the Honorable Alfalfa J-O-2.
00:10:05The Honorable Alfalfa J-O-2?
00:10:07Judge of the United States Circuit Court and shoot him good, what I mean.
00:10:11Is that who yelled?
00:10:13Do you blame him?
00:10:14Then where was Blackie in that tomato?
00:10:16Maybe under the bed.
00:10:17How do I know?
00:10:18The party we're interested in is the one that was on top of the bed.
00:10:21The Honorable Alfalfa J-O-2.
00:10:24I suppose he's awfully irritated.
00:10:27If he's alive, he is.
00:10:28And irritated doesn't begin to describe it.
00:10:31Maybe he doesn't remember my name, Ambrose.
00:10:33Maybe he forgot it in the excitement.
00:10:35Remember your name.
00:10:37In letters of fire, he remembers your name.
00:10:39In letters of fire, nine feet high.
00:10:42When I catch that Blackie...
00:10:44Look, Freddy, a man's a man.
00:10:46And when something new comes along, an opportunity presents itself...
00:10:50It's new about a twist.
00:10:51His thoughts just naturally turn to...
00:10:53You take like me, Freddy, sitting right here in this dungeon beside you.
00:10:57Even I, who sit here, Freddy...
00:10:59Even you, who sit there, Freddy, what?
00:11:02I got a right to sit, ain't I?
00:11:04Well, just keep on sitting.
00:11:05Pronto, open the door.
00:11:07Look what you've done over.
00:11:09That was...
00:11:10Put this bed over that way.
00:11:14Be careful, go.
00:11:15Go over that way, sir.
00:11:16Ah, put that floor down somewhere that way.
00:11:18That's over there.
00:11:20What's going on here?
00:11:23Is the judge still sore, Joe?
00:11:26Yes, he's sore.
00:11:27You mean, is he sore?
00:11:29He ain't sore, he's boiling.
00:11:30He ain't boiling, he's bloating.
00:11:32He's setting fire to the curtains.
00:11:33I brought you something to eat.
00:11:35Thanks, Joe, and for the bed.
00:11:36And the bath, now don't mention it, honey.
00:11:38Maybe I better apologize to him.
00:11:39I guess I better apologize to him.
00:11:41Oh, sure, and take him some fudge.
00:11:42You just take me over there, and when I tell him how sorry I am...
00:11:45I can't do it, Freddy, not without bed.
00:11:47I got the right, Ambrose.
00:11:48I got the legal right.
00:11:49You got what legal right?
00:11:51You got a legal right if you got a court order,
00:11:53and you know who the only person is who can sign that court order?
00:11:56I can guess, I guess.
00:11:57That's right, the Honorable Alfalfa J. O'Toole in person.
00:12:00It isn't as if I was asking for anything, really, Ambrose.
00:12:03You know I wouldn't get you in trouble for the world, Ambrose.
00:12:06I wouldn't even consider it, Freddy.
00:12:08Listen, I was absolutely sure.
00:12:11You'd left your gun here,
00:12:12you wasn't out of my sight for even half a second,
00:12:15and I was right with you all the time.
00:12:17Well, who else would I want to be right with all the time?
00:12:20Ambrose?
00:12:24Freddy, now, Freddy, now.
00:12:26If you just wouldn't wiggle around so much,
00:12:28I'd have it out in an instant.
00:12:30Oh, there we are.
00:12:32Now I've got it.
00:12:33Oh, elusive little devil, is it?
00:12:35I thought sure it was there, it got away again.
00:12:36Well, let's have another whack at it.
00:12:38Oh, if you'd just be a little less cheerful about it,
00:12:42you old windbag of all the butchers I have...
00:12:45Oh, well, I get even with you for there.
00:12:48There, there, there.
00:12:49Ha, ha, I've got it.
00:12:51Or have I?
00:12:51Is that a button off your trousers?
00:12:53No, no, no, it can't be a button off the trousers.
00:12:55It's a different shape.
00:12:56Oh, it can't be a button off the trousers
00:12:57because it'll have a thread in it.
00:12:58This has no thread in it.
00:12:59Oh, it's a safe bet that that's it.
00:13:01Oh.
00:13:02There, there, don't excite yourself.
00:13:03What's a little difference between friends?
00:13:05Between friends, I never even saw her.
00:13:07I haven't seen her yet.
00:13:08She works strictly from the back.
00:13:10I'll give her so much solitary confinement,
00:13:12she'll be talking to herself.
00:13:13And if that crook of a salary shelf
00:13:14allows her so much as one visitor, I'll...
00:13:17Get out and stay out!
00:13:20Yes, don't come in here.
00:13:22Oh, ho.
00:13:24Oh, hello, my love.
00:13:26What is this, Si, here,
00:13:28about your being shot in a young woman's bedroom
00:13:30by her irate and emeritus, you old...
00:13:31There's no sense word as emeritus, madam.
00:13:33Who is this old tramp?
00:13:35Madam, I happen to be the doctor.
00:13:36You were right the first time.
00:13:38Now, if you'll just go home and wait patiently,
00:13:40I'll explain the whole thing.
00:13:42What were you doing in her bedroom?
00:13:44Whose bedroom?
00:13:45Oh, is this a bedroom?
00:13:46How was I to know it was a bedroom?
00:13:47That isn't a hot stove you're sitting on.
00:13:49You can put two and two together.
00:13:50Will you keep your beard out of my soup?
00:13:52Naturally, the doctor put me on a bed.
00:13:54You were shot on a bed.
00:13:55How do you know?
00:13:56The whole town knows.
00:13:57What?
00:13:58It's a very dainty piece of conversation.
00:14:01An old walrus like you, honey-fogling round
00:14:02with this little blonde,
00:14:03when in comes your emeritus and lets you have it.
00:14:05Right in the caboose.
00:14:06Now, listen carefully, Elvira.
00:14:10I was feeling a little dizzy.
00:14:11You know how bilious I've been
00:14:13since your sister went east
00:14:13and you started doing the cooking?
00:14:15So Joe, the proprietor, brought me up here
00:14:17to lie down on that couch for a little while
00:14:18because it wouldn't disturb anybody.
00:14:19Why didn't you lie down downstairs?
00:14:21What on? The farro table?
00:14:22I look great with the customers
00:14:23betting both ends against my middle.
00:14:25So you're entirely alone.
00:14:27I was completely alone.
00:14:29And the next thing that happened...
00:14:30Your emeritus came in and let you have it.
00:14:31Who's the emeritus?
00:14:33Oh, if I live through that...
00:14:34Look, will you believe me
00:14:36if I get the thug she was shooting at up here
00:14:38and have him tell you himself
00:14:39it was him and not me she was trying to plug?
00:14:41I will not,
00:14:42but I would certainly admire
00:14:43seeing you trying to get him to say it.
00:14:45Go get him, doctor, and bring him up here.
00:14:47And if you need a paper, I'll sign it.
00:14:48Certainly.
00:14:48Be sure you find what to say
00:14:50before you bring him in.
00:14:51You may depend upon it, madam.
00:14:52Now, whose room did you say this was?
00:14:55I didn't say anything about it.
00:14:57I suppose it belongs to the hotel.
00:14:58It looks like a hotel room.
00:15:00It wouldn't be a lady's room
00:15:01by any chance, would it?
00:15:02I don't know.
00:15:03I've never been in a lady's room.
00:15:04I suppose this belongs
00:15:05to one of the bartenders.
00:15:06Oh, it may, for all I know.
00:15:08I never...
00:15:09Are these?
00:15:10I don't know.
00:15:11I don't know anything about it.
00:15:12I don't even know what they are.
00:15:13I hope.
00:15:14Oh.
00:15:15Whoever you are, stay out!
00:15:17Hello?
00:15:20Are you feeling nice, sweetie?
00:15:21You little tutu still on fire?
00:15:23I've seen you half-shot lots of times.
00:15:25This is sure the first time I've seen you...
00:15:27Then what are you doing in this room?
00:15:29What am I doing?
00:15:30What should I be doing in this room?
00:15:33What are you doing in my trousers?
00:15:34Your trousers.
00:15:36That's all I wanted to know, Alfalfa.
00:15:39Well, now that you think you know it,
00:15:40why don't you go home?
00:15:41But why is your mother upset?
00:15:42Your mother?
00:15:44Oh!
00:15:46Oh, no.
00:15:48Please.
00:15:49Hello.
00:15:50Hello.
00:15:51Hello.
00:15:51Hello yourself.
00:15:53Now get out of here.
00:15:53What do you think this is, a barbecue?
00:15:55Hello.
00:15:56I just happened to think, Your Honor.
00:15:58Well, cut it out.
00:15:58Now go away.
00:15:59If you want to see me,
00:16:00you can come to court the next time I sit.
00:16:02Oh, why did I have to think of that?
00:16:04She's just sorry she showed you.
00:16:05That's all she want to tell you.
00:16:07That's...
00:16:07What?
00:16:08Just a moment, you.
00:16:09When I get through with you...
00:16:11Now don't excite yourself into a condition,
00:16:12angel face.
00:16:13Now bring that she rattlesnake in here.
00:16:16When I get through with you, young woman,
00:16:18what do you mean,
00:16:19setting this female at liberty, you crook?
00:16:21Why, she ain't at liberty, Your Honor.
00:16:23It's just that she felt so bad on your account.
00:16:25She would have brought you hard, Your Honor.
00:16:27Oh, to know that you're alive, Your Honor,
00:16:29instead of rotting away in some lonely grave.
00:16:32You don't rot quite that soon.
00:16:33Well, why should he rot in a lonely grave from a little...
00:16:36Oh, you're taking this too lightly, Conchita,
00:16:38isn't she, Your Honor?
00:16:39Oh, it's nothing.
00:16:40Turn over, Honeybunch.
00:16:41Don't call my husband Honeybunch.
00:16:43I'm terribly, terribly sorry, Your Honor.
00:16:46If there's any man in the world,
00:16:47I wouldn't have wanted to...
00:16:48You stay away from my husband.
00:16:49Why don't you go home?
00:16:51I'm not thinking of him as your husband, ma'am.
00:16:53You don't have to worry.
00:16:54I'm not thinking of him as a man at all.
00:16:57I'm thinking of him as a father.
00:16:59A forgiving father.
00:17:01To put his arms around me and...
00:17:03Hi, Papi.
00:17:04If you could only find it in your heart to forgive me.
00:17:06To pretend this never happened.
00:17:08With my bucket full of lads.
00:17:10I didn't mean it for you, Your Honor.
00:17:11I didn't mean it for anybody.
00:17:13I don't hardly know one end of a gun from another.
00:17:16I don't hardly know how it got in my hand.
00:17:18All of a sudden, I see this big rook that I slaved for,
00:17:21that I bought neckties for,
00:17:22that I hocked my jewelry for,
00:17:24that I sewed buttons on for,
00:17:25playing puss in the corner with this beazel.
00:17:28What was I supposed to do?
00:17:29Well, he wasn't supposed to plug me, that's a cinch.
00:17:32Look in my eyes, Your Honor.
00:17:34Don't you do it, Alfalfa.
00:17:36Don't listen to her, Judge.
00:17:37He's a little bit upset tonight.
00:17:39Think how they'll talk about you when you let me go.
00:17:41They'll say there's a man with a heart as big as a bullfiddle,
00:17:45even though he did get shot up a little.
00:17:46A little? You should feel...
00:17:47That would have made some men as mad as a bear with a sore paw.
00:17:50It ain't my paw that's sore, honey.
00:17:52The Honorable Alfalfa set her free.
00:17:55He forgave her.
00:17:56He patted her on her little head and said,
00:17:59I forgive you, honey.
00:18:00Paint's a very pretty picture.
00:18:02You know it's what you want to do, Your Honor.
00:18:04Tell the sheriff, tell him to set me free.
00:18:06Don't hold the words in.
00:18:07And then as soon as you're on your feet again, come up and...
00:18:09Don't you do it, Alfalfa.
00:18:11Come up and point out the evil of my ways.
00:18:14I need your help.
00:18:15I need your guidance.
00:18:17I need a papa.
00:18:19Oh, papa.
00:18:20I don't suppose you was really aiming at me at that.
00:18:23Of course I wasn't, Your Honor.
00:18:25You know that.
00:18:26I couldn't any more aim at a human being than I could...
00:18:30I'm the gentle type, Your Honor.
00:18:32I'm the home type.
00:18:34You can see that.
00:18:35Look into my eyes again.
00:18:37Look deep.
00:18:39I got him.
00:18:40I got him.
00:18:41Here he is.
00:18:41Here he is.
00:18:42You wanted to see me, Judge?
00:18:43Judge, I understand there's been some little mis...
00:18:45Understanding that I had no connection with you, understand?
00:18:49But if I can be of any assistance...
00:18:50Oh, so you had no connection with all this in any way, huh?
00:18:53And I suppose you had no connection with that little French omelet either.
00:18:57Just as you didn't have with every other new twilly that's blowing in here.
00:19:00Cut it out, honey.
00:19:00Cut it out.
00:19:01Why, you triple-timing, too faintly.
00:19:03Now, now, wait a minute.
00:19:04So you think you're going to horse around with me, do you?
00:19:06Why, I don't even know what you're talking about, honey.
00:19:08You must have been looking at a couple of other people.
00:19:10Do tell.
00:19:11Ah, there you are, pretty puss.
00:19:13I hope I don't make you much trouble.
00:19:15I've been looking...
00:19:16Not as much as I'm going to make for you, you overdressed little...
00:19:19No, no, Freddie.
00:19:20Why is this, Freddie?
00:19:22What you need is some advice and some guidance.
00:19:24What I need is a gun.
00:19:26Save me.
00:19:27Give me that.
00:19:27No, stop.
00:19:28Give me that.
00:19:29Look out, now.
00:19:29Remember you don't know one hand of the gun from the other.
00:19:33Remember you don't know one hand of the gun from the other.
00:19:46Look out!
00:19:51Look out!
00:19:52No.
00:20:08No. Yes.
00:20:10Will you stop the... Shut up.
00:20:12Ow. Oh, dear.
00:20:14Will you stop the... It could happen to anybody.
00:20:16Not twice in the same place it couldn't. That's very unusual.
00:20:19I'm so sorry.
00:20:22Oh, go away.
00:20:24Don't know what I always say.
00:20:25Shut up.
00:20:26Will you get out of here, you stupid asses,
00:20:29and catch those murderers before they get to Alaska?
00:20:32What?
00:20:34Yes, sir, Your Honor.
00:20:36Well, how about it, Doctor?
00:20:39There, there, Alfalfa.
00:20:40There, there. Now, now, now, now.
00:20:42Have we lost our sense of humor?
00:20:44I should think it'd be a privilege to be shot at by a beauty or anything like that.
00:20:47I remember one time in humor I was going...
00:20:49Will you stop talking?
00:20:51Shove a pillow down your tonsils and start digging, you old windbag.
00:20:54Let's see. Where is it now? Let's see.
00:20:56Ah!
00:20:57Oh!
00:20:58Oh, is that you or the arm of the chair?
00:20:59Let's see.
00:21:00What if?
00:21:01Oh.
00:21:03Oh.
00:21:04Oh, good.
00:21:08Hurry up.
00:21:09Honchida won't miss it.
00:21:10What are you doing?
00:21:13Where'd you get these things?
00:21:20Never mind, I'll explain later.
00:21:27Well, I'm kind of crowded for space.
00:21:29You say you've got tickets?
00:21:30Certainly we've got tickets.
00:21:31What do you think we are, a couple of floobie-jubies?
00:21:33Should I see these here now tickets?
00:21:35We lost them.
00:21:36How's that again?
00:21:37We lose the keys.
00:21:38They're in the statue, but we lose the keys.
00:21:40That's right.
00:21:40Yoo-hoo!
00:21:41Well, shut up before you happen to win accidents, and you too.
00:21:44Now, where do we lay down?
00:21:46Any little old place will do.
00:21:47I'd just like to see them tickets first, because...
00:21:50We told you we lost the keys.
00:21:52Don't you take our word?
00:21:53I see.
00:21:54Well, maybe I can help out along that line.
00:21:57Here.
00:21:58What service?
00:21:59I think this one will just about do it.
00:22:03There we are.
00:22:05And here are the tickets.
00:22:08Oh, no.
00:22:10Yes.
00:22:11Well, chump my claim, if it isn't little Miss Hilda Swandemberg.
00:22:15Oh, naturally.
00:22:16Brother Hengelman's terribly worried about you.
00:22:19Brother who?
00:22:19Brother Hengelman, wondering where you was, told me to be on the lookout for you.
00:22:23Well, it certainly is nice to meet up with you, but he sure didn't tell me what a looker
00:22:27you was.
00:22:28Really?
00:22:29Of course, he's an awful flatterer.
00:22:31Always kidding.
00:22:32I'll telegraph me.
00:22:33You're on board.
00:22:34Woo-hoo!
00:22:35Shut up!
00:22:37Just come with me for to bring the bags.
00:22:39Yes, sir.
00:22:39You're sure going to like it in Snake City.
00:22:41I hope.
00:22:42You must be that little engine girl she was bringing with her.
00:22:45You leave Mama and Papa back home in teepee?
00:22:48How would you like to go with me and see white man's choo-choo, puff-puff engine, huh?
00:22:52How would you like to go sucking in?
00:22:53Oh, she's learned a little English.
00:22:55A little too much, if you ask me.
00:22:57Well, if you need anything during the night, just try pulling the bill handle.
00:23:00If anybody answers it, tell them what you want.
00:23:02Good night.
00:23:03Good night.
00:23:05In here.
00:23:06Yes, ma'am.
00:23:07Hope you all be nice and comfortable.
00:23:09Well, we won't get lost.
00:23:10That's a cinch.
00:23:11Yes, ma'am.
00:23:11Now, where did you get it?
00:23:17Get what?
00:23:17This swan dumper stuff or whatever she calls herself.
00:23:20We're traveling, ain't we?
00:23:21We got to have traveling bags, ain't we?
00:23:23Where did you get them?
00:23:24Oh, we'll send them back later.
00:23:25You stole them.
00:23:26How you talk?
00:23:27You did so.
00:23:28I did not.
00:23:28I heard that woman yelling when the train was pulling out.
00:23:31Couldn't cheat us.
00:23:31Some women are always yelling, never satisfied.
00:23:34You locked her in someplace.
00:23:35I did not.
00:23:36You ought to be ashamed of yourself doing that to another girl.
00:23:38I mean, I don't care what you do to a man, but to another girl.
00:23:41I tell you, I didn't.
00:23:42You know how long you can get for something like that?
00:23:44I mean, we can get.
00:23:45You know how long you can get for plugging or judging both ends?
00:23:48I mean, we also.
00:23:49I'd almost forgotten about that.
00:23:51Look, we needed wallaces, we got wallaces.
00:23:54We needed overcoats, we got overcoats.
00:23:56We needed reservations, we got them.
00:23:58We'll send them back later.
00:23:59Sure, and we'll probably spend the rest of our natural life.
00:24:02Say, what do you know?
00:24:03We're school teachers.
00:24:05How much is one thing's one?
00:24:06Who's school teachers?
00:24:07We are.
00:24:08We are Hilda Swandumper, and we got a license.
00:24:11Ain't that lovely?
00:24:12Just standing.
00:24:14Oh, nice clean work.
00:24:15No drunks to roll, no salesmen to listen to their silly jokes,
00:24:20no getting soused if you don't feel like it.
00:24:22Who's going to teach what?
00:24:23You?
00:24:24You, I guess.
00:24:25I'm just flat feet, the Indian girl, while you teach, I weave baskets.
00:24:29In a pig's pants, I'll be the teacher.
00:24:30Don't you see how this fits a solution?
00:24:32In the first place, I don't know anything.
00:24:34In the second place.
00:24:34What do you have to know to teach a lot of little mugheads
00:24:36who don't know nothing even?
00:24:37What am I going to teach them?
00:24:38How to play stud?
00:24:39Well, you can stud them off on plain draw, couldn't you?
00:24:41Very funny.
00:24:42In the second place, I probably don't look any more like Hilda Swandumper
00:24:45than I look like Swan the Hill Dumper.
00:24:47Or Swedes look alike.
00:24:48In the third place, if there's one place I don't want to be in the first place
00:24:51is when Miss Swandumper shows up without her tickets, without her satchels, without her overcoats,
00:24:55not to mention her hat.
00:24:57She ain't never going to show up.
00:24:58How do you know?
00:24:59Because I borrowed this stuff from a big black box.
00:25:02She must have croaked on the way out.
00:25:04Oh, then who was that doing the yelling when we pulled out?
00:25:08Blackfeet's the Indian girl, I guess.
00:25:10It couldn't have been the other.
00:25:12Oh, poor kid.
00:25:14Don't do that.
00:25:15What's the matter?
00:25:16It's bad enough to put a hat on the bed.
00:25:32I was really beginning to give up on this one.
00:25:36She must have come by way of Alaska.
00:25:39No, no, no.
00:25:40If she hears you sing like that, she won't even get off the train.
00:25:44Look at more enthusiasm.
00:25:44Now, once more.
00:26:01Welcome, Hilda Swandumper.
00:26:03You look so exactly like your name.
00:26:06Quiet, please.
00:26:07I wouldn't know you in a million.
00:26:09I am Dr. Smidlam.
00:26:11As leading music teacher and undertaker of Snake City,
00:26:14it is my pleasant duty to welcome you into our peaceful flight.
00:26:19Will you shut up and introduce the next speaker,
00:26:23Mr. Hingelman, chairman of the school board and local blacksmith.
00:26:28Friends, young ladies, fellow voters of Snake City,
00:26:32as chairman of the school board,
00:26:33as chairman of our school board,
00:26:35it is my warm duty to welcome you as our new teacher
00:26:38and say in conclusion,
00:26:40may bashful Ben's game be Snake City's loss.
00:26:43Thank you very much for both of us,
00:26:46me and my friend.
00:26:47I mean, my little Indian maid.
00:26:49Woo-hoo!
00:26:50Uh,
00:26:50Woo-hoo!
00:26:52Quiet!
00:26:52Shut up!
00:26:53Shut up!
00:26:54I brought my little, uh, friend along
00:26:56because you naturally don't want to live alone.
00:26:58I mean, you know how it is for a strange girl in a strange town.
00:27:01Woo-hoo!
00:27:02Woo-hoo!
00:27:03Woo-hoo!
00:27:04Woo-hoo!
00:27:04Woo-hoo!
00:27:05You won't have a thing to worry about, Hilda.
00:27:08I'm Mrs. Hinklevind, Julius,
00:27:09and I want you to stay with us up to our house.
00:27:11Don't be far.
00:27:12We sure do, Ma.
00:27:14And that goes for a little firewater here, too.
00:27:17How you leaving Papa and Mama, huh?
00:27:19Everything heaped good back in Wigwam?
00:27:21How would you like to go?
00:27:21Everything was wonderful.
00:27:23Fine, fine.
00:27:25Now, I want you to shake hands with Dr. Shultz
00:27:27in case you get sick.
00:27:28The pleasure is mine.
00:27:29And Mr. Sweetser, our sheriff,
00:27:31in case you shoot somebody.
00:27:33My pleasure.
00:27:34Which ain't very apt to happen, huh?
00:27:36Can you imagine?
00:27:37And then we have Mr. Jorgensen,
00:27:40the United States Marshal,
00:27:42in case you done that shooting,
00:27:43on government property.
00:27:45It ain't sweet also, Hilda.
00:27:47No foolin'.
00:27:48Yeah, sure.
00:27:49Bet you we shall have many
00:27:50yally good times together, by yingle.
00:27:53Four, I'll get you six.
00:27:56And last but not least,
00:27:58my son, Charlie,
00:27:59who's been teaching this school
00:28:00against your arrival.
00:28:01How do you do, Miss Swandumper?
00:28:02Welcome to Snake City.
00:28:04Oh, so you were the teacher ahead of me.
00:28:06I'm actually a mining engineer by trade.
00:28:08And owns a little mine of his own.
00:28:10Quite a small one, I assure you.
00:28:11Silver?
00:28:12Oh, no, gold.
00:28:13Oh, I see.
00:28:15May you call me you?
00:28:17Why, the very, the very, the very idea.
00:28:20Me, that ain't hardly,
00:28:21that ain't hardly ever seen you before.
00:28:24Fight the interruptions.
00:28:24If I can be of any assistance whatsoever
00:28:26in acquainting you with that town,
00:28:27it's people, or the schoolhouse,
00:28:29or any other little thing,
00:28:29I am yours to command.
00:28:31Stand back, vomit!
00:28:32I'm about to take Miss Hilda
00:28:34through our fair city
00:28:35and buy her a little drink.
00:28:36Oh, you big wicked man,
00:28:37how dare you talk that away?
00:28:38And it ain't gonna be you, Razorback.
00:28:40Oh, look at that, Papa.
00:28:41Gonna be the real Hilda.
00:28:44How about it, cutie?
00:28:45How about what?
00:28:46And what do you mean
00:28:46by calling this young lady cutie?
00:28:48Take it easy, son.
00:28:49How dare you, son?
00:28:49Dog my cats,
00:28:51if it ain't Jojo the dog-faced boy.
00:28:53How's everything down the kennel, Jojo?
00:28:56I should think you'd be ashamed
00:28:57of yourself, Gus Besserman.
00:28:59Everybody's always trying
00:29:00to put me in the wrong.
00:29:02All I said was...
00:29:02Now, boys, why don't you move on?
00:29:04...in Jojo the dog-faced boy.
00:29:09Oh, you missed him.
00:29:11Get over there, son.
00:29:12I won't miss you, Gus.
00:29:13Is your father all right?
00:29:16Cut it out, boys.
00:29:17Cut it out, gentlemen.
00:29:18Don't let's carry this no further, Gus,
00:29:27because I don't want
00:29:28to have to hurt you, really.
00:29:29You don't, huh?
00:29:30I'll show you how much
00:29:32you're gonna hurt me.
00:29:33Now, boys, let's talk this thing over.
00:29:35You ain't gonna hurt me.
00:29:37You ain't never gonna hurt nobody no more.
00:29:41Get me?
00:29:41I ain't armed, Gus.
00:29:43Take a good look, Julius,
00:29:44because it's the last thing
00:29:46you're ever gonna...
00:29:47Who fired that shot?
00:29:51Who done that?
00:29:52What shot?
00:29:54Dog, my catch,
00:29:55if I didn't do it unconscious.
00:29:56One hundred percent unconscious.
00:29:59You've got a wonderful feeling of security.
00:30:00But the sheriff will be shoot like that,
00:30:02especially when he's a hundred percent unconscious.
00:30:06Of course, this is just my sewing room,
00:30:07but I think you'll be snug in here
00:30:09as two pins in a pin cushion.
00:30:10Now, here's the machine.
00:30:11If you want your little maid to run anything up,
00:30:13I suppose you sew.
00:30:14It has the foot travel,
00:30:15so much more convenient than the hand crank,
00:30:17at least I think.
00:30:18Well, now, dear,
00:30:19you'll sleep there,
00:30:19and your girl can't...
00:30:20What is your name again, dear?
00:30:22Bocahontas.
00:30:24Her name is really Consuelo.
00:30:25She's only half Indian.
00:30:27I ain't pure.
00:30:28She certainly doesn't look it.
00:30:29Only half, I mean.
00:30:30Well, dear,
00:30:31now you can sleep here on the trundle.
00:30:34See how comfortable it is,
00:30:35and be sure you push it back during the daytime.
00:30:38After I get off it.
00:30:39Naturally.
00:30:41She's quite right for it, indeed, isn't she?
00:30:42Well, now, you'll be wanting to go down to the school.
00:30:44Charlie's waiting to take you.
00:30:45In the meanwhile,
00:30:46Connie can make up the room.
00:30:47And I think she'd better hang all your things out alive,
00:30:50or maybe she'd better give them all a light washing and ironing.
00:30:52I always say there's nothing like hard work, soap and water, don't you?
00:30:55I'll go down and put on a tub full.
00:30:58We should have stood in jail.
00:31:00The trouble hasn't even started yet.
00:31:02Wait till I start teaching school.
00:31:03Wait till I start ironing.
00:31:06Of course, we could have walked it.
00:31:07But you wanted to show me your buggy.
00:31:09I guess, baby, I did.
00:31:10It's only natural.
00:31:12Did you have it sent out from the east?
00:31:13Oh, yes.
00:31:14From Omaha.
00:31:15Do tell.
00:31:16You must show me your gold mine, too, someday.
00:31:18If you don't mind going down in a bucket.
00:31:21How is that again?
00:31:22Well, you see, a gold mine having no stairs,
00:31:24you'd have to be lowered in a bucket.
00:31:25Like the girl from Nantucket.
00:31:27Excuse me.
00:31:28How is that?
00:31:29Oh, oh, just a poem.
00:31:30Is there a lot of gold in your mine?
00:31:33There might be.
00:31:33And then again...
00:31:34Oh, sure.
00:31:35At the moment, we're only taking out 40 ounces.
00:31:37That's about $800 worth.
00:31:39A year?
00:31:39Oh, no, a week.
00:31:41A week?
00:31:41Oh, yes.
00:31:43Well, what do you know?
00:31:46Oh, here's our little church.
00:31:48Would you like to see it?
00:31:49I'd love to see it.
00:31:50Then I'd love to show it to you.
00:31:53Oh, isn't this pretty?
00:31:55Do you come here on Sundays?
00:31:56As a matter of fact, I play the organ in it on Sundays.
00:31:58No fooling.
00:32:00Now, wherever did they get an organ?
00:32:01I mean, way out here.
00:32:03As a matter of fact, I gave it to them out of the gold mine.
00:32:05Now, isn't that something?
00:32:07Not really.
00:32:08Only $65 plus freight.
00:32:10Would you like to hear it?
00:32:11Oh, sure.
00:32:12It looks at least like a $100 one.
00:32:14That's what it said in the prospectus.
00:32:16But you sing.
00:32:42Oh, I do quite a lot of things besides schoolteach.
00:32:44Shall we try it again and you take the lead this time?
00:32:47I'll try to remember it.
00:32:48Is this key all right?
00:32:49Oh, I wouldn't know one key from another.
00:32:51Splendid.
00:32:52In the gloaming, O my darling,
00:33:05When the lights are dim and low
00:33:14And the quiet shadows falling
00:33:24Softly come and softly go
00:33:33When the winds are sobbing faintly
00:33:42With a gentle unknown woe
00:33:52Will you think of me
00:33:59And love me
00:34:03As you did once long ago
00:34:11Will you think of me
00:34:16Will you think of me
00:34:18And love me
00:34:22As you did once long ago
00:34:30That was wonderful
00:34:41The way you sang
00:34:43Combined with the way you look
00:34:44Combined with that perfume
00:34:45I'm terribly sorry
00:34:52I didn't want to make you do that
00:34:53Please don't cry
00:34:54I'm...
00:34:54Two...
00:34:55Two Indians
00:34:56What?
00:34:57Oh, the Bassman brothers
00:34:59Somebody gave them those feathers for Christmas
00:35:00I forgot to mention
00:35:02They're all so eavesdrippers
00:35:03Oh, I'm glad you warned me
00:35:05Did you think it was because you kissed me
00:35:07I got so frightened?
00:35:08Oh, I wouldn't be frightened of you, Charlie
00:35:10Thank you
00:35:11Thank you, Hilda
00:35:12I wouldn't be frightened of you, either
00:35:14Oh, thank you, Sheila
00:35:15Pass these down the line for me, will you, Orville?
00:35:27Sure, Wilbur
00:35:27Five foot two blonde
00:35:30Very pretty, nice shape
00:35:32That's a nice size, too
00:35:33I sure hate them big, fat ones
00:35:34Now, why does that ring some kind of bell in me?
00:35:37They sure ring my bell, them little juicy ones
00:35:39I remember one time...
00:35:40And hired a Mexican girl with her
00:35:42If them folks in Snake City hadn't all of known her so good
00:35:45And where she come from and all
00:35:46I'd have swore just that when I carry Saturday night
00:35:49With that fresh little Indian gal
00:35:50She was, huh?
00:35:52Told me to go suck an egg
00:35:53No fooling
00:35:54I bet you told her something
00:35:55Then you'll collect
00:35:56Shouldn't allow them to ride on trains at all
00:35:59The way I look at her
00:36:00But then I ain't running the government
00:36:01I'll take these down the line for you, Wilbur
00:36:03Thanks, Orville
00:36:04No trouble at all, Wilbur
00:36:05All aboard
00:36:10Yes, sir?
00:36:18Snake City, please
00:36:19One way
00:36:19You done perfect
00:36:34Goodbye and good luck
00:36:35Thank you
00:36:36As if you've been ringing for years, dear
00:36:38Well, you know, practice makes perfect
00:36:39We feel the children are in good hands
00:36:41Thank you
00:36:42Well, goodbye and good luck
00:36:44Not that you needed me
00:36:46Are you coming to school, Conchi?
00:36:48I got to do a washing
00:36:49Some fun, huh?
00:36:50I'll drive you
00:36:51Me too
00:36:54Thank you
00:36:55Bye
00:36:55Are you sure that you don't want me to stay just for the first morning?
00:36:58Well, if I'm going to handle them at all
00:36:59I might as well dive right in and get it over with
00:37:01Are you sure you don't want me to stay within screaming distance?
00:37:03Why should they scream?
00:37:04I'm not going to hurt them
00:37:05That isn't exactly what I had in mind
00:37:07However, in any case
00:37:08Will you take this as a desk piece with all my good wishes?
00:37:11Oh
00:37:11Oh, it's beautiful
00:37:15And so sweet and thoughtful of you
00:37:17I suppose you know which end you point at your objective
00:37:20Oh, yes
00:37:21Which end you hold in your little hand
00:37:22Yes, indeed
00:37:23And how to load and unload it
00:37:24Quite
00:37:25I hope there's no danger of your hurting yourself
00:37:27Oh, I don't think so
00:37:28Somebody might get hurt
00:37:29But it won't be me
00:37:30Thank you very much
00:37:31And I'll see you later, Charlie
00:37:33I've tried four times now
00:37:43And I'm beginning to be just a little tired of it
00:37:45You little kids are all right
00:37:47Later
00:37:48But there must be some foreigners in this room
00:37:50Because some of you big ones
00:37:51Don't seem to know what I'm talking about
00:37:53Now, I don't like geology any better than you do
00:37:56But you'll learn it if it cloaks you
00:37:58Also, you're going to quit talking in class
00:38:00You're going to listen
00:38:01Ah, phooey
00:38:04And those of you that have
00:38:06And those of you that have been drinking and smoking
00:38:15Are going to be very much surprised
00:38:17In a very short while
00:38:19Now, maybe some of you think I'm kind of little and small
00:38:22But where I come from
00:38:23The bunny rabbits have teeth that long
00:38:25And howl like timber wolves
00:38:27And even the dwarfs are over six feet six
00:38:32That's right, boys
00:38:36Get rid of some big ones
00:38:37Because they're going to be your last ones
00:38:38Now, I'm going to give you all a ten-minute recess
00:38:41To go out and play
00:38:41Only stay away from the building
00:38:43I've heard enough of you
00:38:44Now, beat it
00:38:45I'll accept you two
00:38:54Wouldn't you rather stay here and play with me?
00:38:57That's fine
00:38:58Just go back to your desk
00:39:00And we'll have lots of fun
00:39:02Oh, good
00:39:03Just us three
00:39:04Like yesterday
00:39:08In the window
00:39:10You, uh, like to drink in class, huh?
00:39:25What's the difference?
00:39:28Suppose I told you I didn't like it
00:39:30Other teachers told us
00:39:31They didn't like it, too
00:39:33But you didn't care what the other teacher said
00:39:37That's right
00:39:38You're going to care what this teacher says
00:39:41Is that, is that so?
00:39:43Or this little teacher is going to blow your little head off
00:39:46How is that?
00:39:50Why don't you take another little drink?
00:39:52I bet it would taste awful good
00:39:54You care to join us, ma'am?
00:39:56With pleasure
00:39:56Stick that cigarette in your mouth, ugly mug
00:40:04You, the other one
00:40:06No, no, just, just a minute
00:40:07You ain't got no, no, no money
00:40:10Stick that cigarette in your mouth
00:40:12Before I ram it down your throat
00:40:13Now turn and look at your brother
00:40:17And keep praying
00:40:18Shut up and put that ink bottle on your head
00:40:25The ink, the b-b-bottle
00:40:27Go on now
00:40:28No, no, no
00:40:29I'm going to tell my daddy
00:40:32Just for that you get the same, you rat
00:40:34Put that ink bottle on your head
00:40:35Before I shoot your ears off
00:40:37Steady
00:40:40Now, you want me to show you like this to the other kids
00:40:45Or do you want to make a little deal with me
00:40:47And wash your faces and behave yourselves from now on
00:40:49And help me keep order with the other bad ones
00:40:51Because I'm about as much scared of you
00:40:54As I am of a pair of mosquitoes
00:40:55And I've got two shots left in this thing
00:40:58Only the next time I'm not going to be so careful
00:41:01You get me?
00:41:01Oh, mom
00:41:03Oh, mom
00:41:04Quiet!
00:41:18Quiet!
00:41:18Quiet!
00:41:20Quiet!
00:41:20And now we're going to start our little lesson
00:41:26The earth is divided into three kingdoms
00:41:31The animal, the vegetable, and the…
00:41:35The mineral!
00:41:39Oh, and the mineral, of course.
00:41:43I knew you boys would work out sooner or later.
00:41:46And the mineral is called geology.
00:41:50Now, ain't that something?
00:41:57Howdy.
00:41:58Oh, howdy, stranger.
00:42:00Something I can do for you?
00:42:02I'm looking for a young woman called Freddie Jones.
00:42:05Winifred Jones.
00:42:06I heard she might have dropped off in your fed city.
00:42:10Last seen traveling with a little Mexican girl called Conchita.
00:42:14I'm wondering if by any chance...
00:42:15Oh, I used to know a fellow by the name of Freddie Jones.
00:42:18Only we just called him Plain Fred.
00:42:20He died about 20 years ago.
00:42:23Well, then there was Charlie Jones, son of Rufus B.
00:42:26And his wife, Mary.
00:42:28Mamie, they used to call her.
00:42:30Or was it Lucy?
00:42:31Well, it really doesn't matter.
00:42:32Oh, I might as well get it straight.
00:42:34Then, of course, there was Clifford Jones.
00:42:35Now, if you'd ever seen Freddie, you'd never mistake her for Clifford.
00:42:39That's right.
00:42:39She said a pretty girl.
00:42:41What a girl?
00:42:42Oh, a nice shape to her.
00:42:43Fantastic.
00:42:44Well, too bad I ain't seen her.
00:42:46I sure enjoy a nice shape to a woman.
00:42:48Well, who doesn't?
00:42:49Stabbing to your garden, boys.
00:42:51Hope that you'll find many joys.
00:42:53Some fun, eh?
00:42:54Buenos dias, señorita.
00:42:57Esperate que te quiero hablar.
00:42:58Ven aquí.
00:42:59Espérate que te quiero hablar.
00:43:00Ven aquí.
00:43:01A donde está ella?
00:43:01Ay, mi madre, yo no conozco a nadie.
00:43:03No, yo no conozco a nadie.
00:43:04Yo soy un vengueto, señorita.
00:43:05Dime dónde están los médicos mentiras.
00:43:06Espérate que está mirando.
00:43:09Am I sure?
00:43:10But you didn't tell him I was here.
00:43:11I could have stayed on the train after you got off.
00:43:12I didn't tell him nothing.
00:43:14I tell him I'd never seen him before.
00:43:16I tell him to go fry himself an enchilada.
00:43:18I tell him I am fresh in this country from Guatemala
00:43:20and that if he think I look like anybody he know,
00:43:22I'm crazy.
00:43:23All in Spanish, you understand.
00:43:24I tell him you got off the train two stations behind
00:43:27and that you have no connection with the new school teacher
00:43:29who's an old bag about 60.
00:43:31What did he say?
00:43:32He said he'll meet you at the schoolhouse at 8 o'clock.
00:43:34I see.
00:43:35All in Spanish.
00:43:36In perfect Spanish.
00:43:37You must have fooled him completely.
00:43:39I'm not certain.
00:43:39What could he want?
00:43:41Look in the mirror.
00:43:42Applesauce.
00:43:43A guy like that would never take a train for...
00:43:44Wait a minute.
00:43:45There might be a reward.
00:43:46A reward?
00:43:47For what?
00:43:48For me, dead or alive.
00:43:50Who would want you dead?
00:43:51That's it, the snake.
00:43:52He gets hunk with me for back there
00:43:54and some dough besides a cheap so-and-so.
00:43:56Where's my gun?
00:43:57Oh, now listen, please.
00:43:58It's down at the schoolhouse.
00:43:59You tell Charlie I went ahead.
00:44:00He's given me a lesson tonight
00:44:01and have him meet me there about a quarter after.
00:44:04That'll give me time to take care of Mr. Blackie.
00:44:06Haven't you had enough trouble?
00:44:07Not with him, I haven't.
00:44:19Anybody here?
00:44:32All right, all right.
00:44:42All right.
00:44:49All right.
00:45:19Come in, you rat.
00:45:34Good evening.
00:45:34Here's the sun dumper.
00:45:36Why, Mr. Jurgensen.
00:45:37I hope I don't interrupt him.
00:45:39You're certainly the last person
00:45:40I expected to see here tonight.
00:45:42I hope you're going to feel good.
00:45:44I've been pretty good.
00:45:45How have you been?
00:45:45I've been fine, thank you.
00:45:47I hope those two yackles
00:45:50don't give you too much trouble
00:45:52for your first day.
00:45:53Those two what?
00:45:54The bassemens, them two skerkles.
00:45:56Oh, no, not a bit.
00:45:57They were even very nice.
00:45:58You must have very good influence then
00:46:00because they are really a pair of yackles.
00:46:02No, no, no, no.
00:46:05Oh, yes, they are by yings.
00:46:07You better come away from the window.
00:46:09You might catch cold.
00:46:09Well, now, that's very sweet of you,
00:46:11Hildes van Dumper.
00:46:13I shall now tell you where I come to see you.
00:46:15I got a letter from U.S. Marshal in Rimpaw City.
00:46:18Oh.
00:46:18In letter is reward notice.
00:46:21Oh.
00:46:21Some young flicker called Jones,
00:46:23uh, Fred de Jones.
00:46:25She shoots it at federal judge.
00:46:27My gracious.
00:46:28Where'd you say she shot it?
00:46:30In Rimpaw City, on both sides.
00:46:32Why, I never heard of such a thing.
00:46:35I would like to see the way you hold the gun.
00:46:37A gun?
00:46:38Well, I wouldn't know any more about it.
00:46:40Miss Jones supposed to be wonderful revolver shooter.
00:46:43Twice from long distance,
00:46:44she shoot the judge in the same shooting place.
00:46:46I wouldn't know any more about holding a gun
00:46:48that I don't even know which end of the trigger you.
00:46:51Just let me see you hold it.
00:46:53Well, all right.
00:46:53But if anything happens.
00:46:56No, no, no.
00:46:56Not that way.
00:46:57This way.
00:46:58Oh.
00:47:00Is this where you put your finger?
00:47:01Yeah, yeah.
00:47:02That is correct.
00:47:03No, no.
00:47:04Don't ever put it.
00:47:06Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
00:47:07I told you not to.
00:47:09Well, I have now done my duty.
00:47:12I've been satisfied.
00:47:14I thank.
00:47:14Thank you, too.
00:47:16Thank you, Hildes van Dumper.
00:47:18Good night.
00:47:34What's all the excitement?
00:47:35A little pop gun bother you?
00:47:37Not in the slightest.
00:47:39But that wasn't a very nice thing to do to that comic.
00:47:41You nearly scared him out of his accent.
00:47:43How long have you been here?
00:47:44I'm always early for appointments.
00:47:45I found it a very healthy habit.
00:47:46You think so.
00:47:48I know so.
00:47:52Good to see you, baby.
00:47:53Taste that lip rouge.
00:47:54I sure missed you.
00:47:55I didn't miss you.
00:47:56Oh, yes, you did.
00:47:57But what I can't figure is how you're getting by as Miss Gargleswamp at the Mighty School Mom,
00:48:03or whatever that awful name is.
00:48:04You can't spell cat.
00:48:06I can spell louse.
00:48:07Very funny.
00:48:08And I might know a couple of other things you don't know about.
00:48:10You might, but you don't.
00:48:12I know each and every one of your talents.
00:48:14And I cherish each and every one of them.
00:48:17I see.
00:48:18Have you got any other bright last remarks before I let you have it?
00:48:21Before you let me have what?
00:48:22Oh!
00:48:23You going into your act again?
00:48:27Haven't you missed me enough times for one week?
00:48:28I said, have you got any other last remarks, you rat?
00:48:31Only that I love you.
00:48:33That I've always loved you.
00:48:34That I always will love you.
00:48:36I need to look even lovelier here in the candlelight than I remembered you're looking.
00:48:40Oh, shut up!
00:48:40And it's pretty hard for anyone, even you, to look better than the picture of you.
00:48:45I carry in my heart.
00:48:47With a reward sign under it.
00:48:49That I don't suppose you'd happen to know anything about.
00:48:51I know all about it.
00:48:52That's why I'm here.
00:48:53I see.
00:48:53I came to warn you.
00:48:55Very thoughtful of you.
00:48:56I suppose that thousand dollars didn't mean anything to you at all.
00:49:00Nothing at all.
00:49:01You'd sell your grandmother for forty dollars.
00:49:03That's an entirely different matter.
00:49:04She's very old and not at all well preserved.
00:49:06Whereas you, on the other hand, are the roundest, the daintiest,
00:49:10the most fragrant and the most irresistible little witch that ever flew out of a cave.
00:49:14Do tell.
00:49:14Even though you have the mind of a child of three and the disposition of a tarantula.
00:49:18Listen, you snake, you might as well save that applesauce,
00:49:20because I haven't any more feeling for you than I have for the cheapest,
00:49:23the slimiest, the lowest downer, the meanest...
00:49:26Skunk, you've already said rat, snake, and louse.
00:49:30Now, come on, let's get out of here before it's too late.
00:49:32This town isn't any good for us anyway.
00:49:34What we need is a nice little town with a nice little sporting element
00:49:37where they enjoy a song, where they like to play a little cards.
00:49:40After what you pull, I'd like to know how it's any of your business,
00:49:43where I stay or what I do or...
00:49:45Because I make it my business, baby.
00:49:47You've been all my business ever since the first time I got a gander at you.
00:49:50And until something happens to me, or to you, or to both of us,
00:49:54you're going to keep right on being my business.
00:49:56You come any nearer, you're going to be out of business right now.
00:49:59No, put that thing away and stop being ridiculous.
00:50:01You know you're fooling with sudden death, don't you?
00:50:03As a sudden death artist, you make me snicker.
00:50:07You don't think I'd be parading around like this
00:50:08if there was any ammunition in that cannon, do you?
00:50:10You think I'm fresh off a farm?
00:50:11What? You liar!
00:50:13Well, pull the trigger and find out.
00:50:15Now you see why it's good to be early for appointments.
00:50:18Here are the two live ones you had left.
00:50:20You must have been missing some of your other friends.
00:50:25I'd like to hit you with a nice, flat rock.
00:50:29Would you like me to go out and get you one?
00:50:34That won't be necessary, thank you.
00:50:37Why don't you stop talking like a little fathead and get ready to come along?
00:50:40You know you want to.
00:50:41Besides, you haven't any choice in the matter, honey.
00:50:43Haven't I?
00:50:44Of course not.
00:50:46I don't want to sound commercial, but if you forced me to let them know where you were...
00:50:49And collect the thousand.
00:50:51That would be small consolation for losing you, baby.
00:50:53But it would be something.
00:50:54Half a loaf is better than nothing.
00:50:56Yes, sir, a big, flat rock.
00:50:58Not a little jagged one that would mess up the place.
00:51:01Don't be gruesome.
00:51:02Or a round, lumpy one that would dent your skull in.
00:51:04How you talk.
00:51:06But a nice, big, smooth, flat rock.
00:51:10About like this?
00:51:11That's just about right.
00:51:13You may fire when ready, Gridley.
00:51:15You are the funniest, Luke.
00:51:20He ain't he, ain't he, ain't he?
00:51:23Well, he's still alive anyway.
00:51:24Yeah?
00:51:25What do you want us to do with him now?
00:51:27Throw him in the swamp.
00:51:28Let's just get rid of him before Charlie Hingelman gets here.
00:51:31We can throw him in old man Hingelman's forge.
00:51:33And oom-pah, oom-pah, oom-pah, the bellows.
00:51:36He's come out like a piece of toast.
00:51:38We don't need anything that fancy.
00:51:40There's someone coming.
00:51:41I can hear footsteps.
00:51:42Come on, help me put him in the closet.
00:51:43Hurry up.
00:51:44Yes, ma'am.
00:51:45Hurry up.
00:51:47Come on, lift him up.
00:51:48Oh, yes, ma'am.
00:51:53No, officer.
00:51:57It's locked.
00:51:58No, I can't hear you.
00:51:59No.
00:51:59Then we better take him with us.
00:52:01No, no, no.
00:52:02Put him under the desk.
00:52:04Look right.
00:52:05One, two, three.
00:52:10You didn't have to break every bone in his body.
00:52:12Now get out of here.
00:52:13Come on.
00:52:14Come on, ma'am.
00:52:16We'll be watching outside for the next one.
00:52:21Beat it.
00:52:28Come in, Charlie.
00:52:30Ah, all ready for our little arithmetic lesson, I hope?
00:52:33I hope I'm not late.
00:52:34Anything but.
00:52:35If you'd been one minute sooner,
00:52:36you would have been a couple of minutes too soon.
00:52:38I'm sorry I had to come on ahead.
00:52:40I hope you weren't afraid.
00:52:40I mean, being way out here alone for so long.
00:52:42Oh, you're never really alone, you know,
00:52:45with the owl, the bat, the night jar.
00:52:48Ah, yes, yes.
00:52:49Copley mulchus europeus or goatsucker.
00:52:51I hope your first day wasn't too hard
00:52:53with those two human buzzards disguised as schoolchildren.
00:52:55I mean, the baseman.
00:52:56No, no, no.
00:52:57Don't even think of it.
00:52:58Ah, ah, ah, this is a friend.
00:53:00How was that?
00:53:00They were even very helpful.
00:53:02I'm relieved to know it
00:53:02because of all the cold, brotherly cutthroats
00:53:04I've ever known,
00:53:05Wakefield, in my dreams,
00:53:07they take the meat hacks.
00:53:08No, no, no, no.
00:53:09I have the most real feeling
00:53:10that you're talking to somebody else,
00:53:11but I know you can't be
00:53:12since we're obviously alone
00:53:13but I have that peculiar feeling anyway.
00:53:15Maybe something you ate.
00:53:17Ah, Strix vulgaris,
00:53:19or boo-boo virginianus.
00:53:20If it is the great horned owl,
00:53:22he can probably see you from his perch
00:53:23and is telling the night
00:53:24how beautiful you are.
00:53:25That's very kind of you, Charlie,
00:53:27but if we're going to talk along those lines,
00:53:29let's take a little walk.
00:53:30Did you hear that?
00:53:31No, what?
00:53:32Felice Conkler,
00:53:32the American puma,
00:53:33it sounded almost as if...
00:53:35There it is.
00:53:35There it is again.
00:53:37Oh, I didn't hear anything.
00:53:38He must be able to death
00:53:39as practically in this room.
00:53:41It's a bear.
00:53:41It's just a Americanus.
00:53:42A bear?
00:53:42A bear, not a mouse.
00:53:43Well, I'm getting ready to run.
00:53:44Wait a minute.
00:53:45How could it be a bear?
00:53:45Let's not find out.
00:53:46You mustn't be ridiculous.
00:53:47I don't mind.
00:53:47Where's your gun?
00:53:48Right on the desk.
00:53:49I mean, I don't know where it is.
00:53:49I'll get it.
00:53:50He might bite you.
00:53:53Come on!
00:54:08I had such different plans for the night.
00:54:23I suppose you have.
00:54:25What was that?
00:54:26It's near the schoolhouse.
00:54:27Somebody must have shot that bear.
00:54:27Come on!
00:54:28Are you sure that you don't want to?
00:54:29I'm positive.
00:54:29Come on!
00:54:30Try to hit me with a rock, will you?
00:54:34You dirty little badger.
00:54:36Better men than you have tried to...
00:54:38Humpos.
00:54:52It's the Basserman boys.
00:54:54Still breathing?
00:54:56I don't think so.
00:54:58Poor little doggies.
00:54:59They weren't so bad.
00:55:00Who do you suppose could have killed them?
00:55:01Not that lots of people didn't have plenty of reason to.
00:55:03I guess I did.
00:55:04You did.
00:55:05You were right with me all the time.
00:55:06I know.
00:55:07I mean, in a way.
00:55:09There are a lot of things you don't understand, Charlie.
00:55:11We'd better go and tell somebody.
00:55:13The sheriff, I guess.
00:55:14Not that it'll do much good now.
00:55:16But I don't understand.
00:55:17I know you don't.
00:55:18And I'll explain it all to you someday.
00:55:20Just don't make me explain it all to you now.
00:55:21I feel sick.
00:55:31Now, just a minute.
00:55:32Just a minute.
00:55:33Let's get together here.
00:55:34Everybody talking at once.
00:55:35I'll conduct the investigation if it's all the same to you, George.
00:55:37Why, certainly, Cheryl.
00:55:38I mean, we don't get so many shootings around here.
00:55:40I was just trying to be helpful.
00:55:41I know, but we must be logical about this.
00:55:44Now, who in town would want to shoot the Basserman boys?
00:55:46Practically everybody.
00:55:47What is this terrible calamity I hear?
00:55:49What calamity?
00:55:50Those dear little Basserman boys are blown to mincemeat by some person.
00:55:53The person's unknown.
00:55:54Dear little Basserman boys.
00:55:56Aren't you exaggerating a little?
00:55:58Dr. Schultz has gone to bring back their bodies.
00:56:01Did they have a mother?
00:56:02I buried her.
00:56:03Aha!
00:56:05Now, where did you say the corposis was?
00:56:08In front of the schoolhouse.
00:56:09Oh, half on the porch, half off the porch, wasn't it?
00:56:12That's right.
00:56:12One with his face looking down, one with his face looking up.
00:56:15Ain't it?
00:56:15That's right.
00:56:16Ain't there?
00:56:17They ain't there.
00:56:17Absolutely next.
00:56:18Jump in Jerusalem.
00:56:19I knew I should have gone out there myself every time I trust everything to you.
00:56:22Listen, I tell you the corposis ain't there.
00:56:24There is no corposis.
00:56:25Delicti or any other kind.
00:56:27All we found was this.
00:56:29Now, you're putting fingerprints on it.
00:56:30I'm supposed to handle it with my teeth and my pee like a dog.
00:56:33Ain't this the gun I gave you, Charlie, when you was 21 that you never learned to shoot?
00:56:37Now, we're getting something.
00:56:38Why, yes, but I...
00:56:38He gave it to me.
00:56:39Oh, ho!
00:56:40Oh, what?
00:56:41Now, hold your horses, Ike.
00:56:42This is the lethal weapon.
00:56:44The what weapon?
00:56:45Stop lisping, will you?
00:56:46I can't understand you.
00:56:47Oh!
00:56:48Oh!
00:56:49Oh, you killed my boys, huh?
00:56:52First you broke my wife's heart, then you tried to drive me out of town, and now you killed my boys.
00:56:57Who done it?
00:56:58Come on, spit it out.
00:57:00Keep an eye on me just to soon shoot me.
00:57:01Keep your hair on, Gus.
00:57:03We feel just as bad about this as you do.
00:57:05Just the same.
00:57:05You can save that hogwash who killed my sons.
00:57:08Now, just a minute.
00:57:09Shut up, you.
00:57:09That's what we're trying to find out, Gus.
00:57:11That's what we're here for.
00:57:12Where are they at?
00:57:13You don't have to try and hide them from me.
00:57:15I'll bury them myself.
00:57:17And I'll bury some of the rest of you if you don't tell me you've done it.
00:57:20That's a good one.
00:57:21Shut them all.
00:57:22We don't know who done it, Gus.
00:57:24Now we don't even know where the bodies is.
00:57:26My son's seen them and examined them at the schoolhouse, but now they're gone.
00:57:29What do you mean they're gone?
00:57:31Why should they be gone?
00:57:32What kind of a cock and bull story is that?
00:57:33Wait a minute.
00:57:34Why are you trying to hide them from me, you drunken buzzard?
00:57:36Tear my sons.
00:57:37Take your hands off me.
00:57:38What's so sacred about you?
00:57:40Why is Mr. Hingelman's son so much better than Mr. Basselman's son's?
00:57:43You mustn't put your hands on Mr. Hingelman's son.
00:57:45But Mr. Basselman's son's, you can take them out and shoot them like dogs.
00:57:50And then throw them out on the swill pile.
00:57:54Whose gun is that?
00:57:56Is that what done it?
00:57:57Who's gun is that?
00:57:58Get excited, Gus.
00:57:59Now, just a minute, Mr.
00:58:00What are you going to say about it?
00:58:01You little...
00:58:02I'm terribly sorry, Mr. Basselman.
00:58:05I didn't know your boys very well.
00:58:06I just met them today, but I liked them.
00:58:08I really did.
00:58:09And that's my gun.
00:58:11Oh, it is, Gus.
00:58:12Take your hands off the lady.
00:58:13What lady?
00:58:14Well, you drunken sod.
00:58:14I gave her the gun.
00:58:15Oh, you did, did you?
00:58:21Stop it and get out of here.
00:58:24You will, will you?
00:58:29Stop that to me.
00:58:30Get him back to me.
00:58:32I'm going out of here.
00:58:33Oh, I asked you, I command it yourself.
00:58:35Oh, my God.
00:58:35Stop it.
00:58:39Be careful, miss.
00:58:44Get out of my way.
00:58:47Look out.
00:58:48Let's go.
00:59:18Let him in.
00:59:19Come on.
00:59:20Hold the gun.
00:59:21Where are they?
00:59:22Hold it!
00:59:23Hold it!
00:59:24Hold it!
00:59:25Hold it!
00:59:26Hold it!
00:59:39Hurry!
00:59:48Come on!
00:59:56Come on!
01:00:18Move him.
01:00:19How about to blow!
01:00:20Marketチャンネル is in a very nice corner!
01:00:21Come on!
01:00:22Come on!
01:00:23Come on!
01:00:24Come on!
01:00:25Andy?
01:00:27Come on!
01:00:28There's a team!
01:00:29I'm going to get here here!
01:00:30Come on!
01:00:31Move me!
01:00:32There you go!
01:00:34Ah!
01:00:35I got to get hurt!
01:00:37This man didn't get hurt.
01:00:39He didn't get hurt!
01:00:40If I to get touched,
01:00:41give me a voice.
01:00:43Get agitated!
01:00:44Get on your screamed!
01:00:45Come on!
01:00:46Let's go.
01:01:16Let's go.
01:01:46Let's go.
01:01:47Let's go.
01:01:48Let's go.
01:01:49Let's go.
01:01:50Let's go.
01:01:51Let's go.
01:01:52Let's go.
01:01:53Let's go.
01:01:54Let's go.
01:01:55Let's go.
01:01:56Let's go.
01:01:57Let's go.
01:01:58Let's go.
01:01:59Let's go.
01:02:00Let's go.
01:02:01Let's go.
01:02:02Let's go.
01:02:03Let's go.
01:02:04Let's go.
01:02:05Let's go.
01:02:06Let's go.
01:02:07Let's go.
01:02:08Let's go.
01:02:09Let's go.
01:02:10Let's go.
01:02:11Let's go.
01:02:12Let's go.
01:02:13Let's go.
01:02:14Let's go.
01:02:15Let's go.
01:02:16Let's go.
01:02:17Let's go.
01:02:18Let's go.
01:02:19Let's go.
01:02:20Let's go.
01:02:21Let's go.
01:02:22Let's go.
01:02:23Let's go.
01:02:24Let's go.
01:02:25Let's go.
01:02:26Let's go.
01:02:27Let's go.
01:02:28Move us to pieces, to pieces.
01:02:29Should we stop breathing?
01:02:30I saw the shooting.
01:02:31Where's the fight?
01:02:32Right here, brother.
01:02:33Ha ha.
01:02:34You look like you'd had one already.
01:02:35Just fire through that window over there!
01:02:37You got a gun?
01:02:39They have one of mine.
01:02:40Just fire through the window right over there.
01:02:43Hit anything you can see.
01:02:46Get that horse ready!
01:02:50Don't działers outкивARRNote Mr. Hengeman.
01:02:53Look!
01:02:54Look! Look! Stop!
01:02:58Listen! Look here!
01:03:05Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop!
01:03:21How are you?
01:03:24Now, pick this thing up and hold it in front of us, if you can.
01:03:49Well, you got your side, huh?
01:03:53Pick him up in the halo.
01:03:55Hang him out the window.
01:03:56He'll get something to shoot at.
01:03:58How do you want him, Hank?
01:03:59That's upside down by the top of the house.
01:04:01What's the matter with the usual way?
01:04:04They took the mine.
01:04:05A son for a son.
01:04:07Take him out.
01:04:08Come on, you.
01:04:09Come on.
01:04:11We'll bring Charlie back or kill a whole bunch of them.
01:04:14Who's going to do the shooting here?
01:04:15They ain't that good.
01:04:16I'll do the shooting.
01:04:17Oh, you think so?
01:04:18You said it, I bet you can.
01:04:19Go on, third break.
01:04:20Come on.
01:04:21Come on.
01:04:22Do you mind?
01:04:23Come on.
01:04:24Do you mind?
01:04:25Come on, you're crazy.
01:04:44Come on.
01:04:50Come on.
01:04:51Come on, hurry up, will you?
01:05:01Just a minute.
01:05:10Oh, no, Hilda, I was here.
01:05:12Never mind.
01:05:21Hey, wait a minute, what are we shooting at her for?
01:05:35Herb, that could be a blow started all the trouble.
01:05:38Wait a minute.
01:05:39I must be on the wrong side.
01:05:41Oh, you are, are you?
01:05:43Oh, you would, would you?
01:05:45Take it easy, you wouldn't shoot me down in cold blood like a rat.
01:05:48Oh, yes, I would.
01:05:49Cut it off, will you?
01:05:50You didn't think that way about the people out there.
01:05:52Take that.
01:05:56You would, would you?
01:05:57You would, would you?
01:05:59Hey!
01:06:00What's the matter, Chief?
01:06:01Call a spy.
01:06:02Just watch what I'm gonna do to him.
01:06:04Come on, get it over with.
01:06:05He's supposed to do that, Chief.
01:06:06You're supposed to hang spies.
01:06:07Are you?
01:06:08It's more dishonorable that way.
01:06:09Oh.
01:06:10Why don't you finish it?
01:06:11Take him up and hang him with the other one, then.
01:06:15We gotta do things proper.
01:06:17Excuse me.
01:06:20Where?
01:06:21There.
01:06:22Right out of the barn, lost.
01:06:23Charlie!
01:06:27Give me that other gun.
01:06:28Hurry, hurry, hurry.
01:06:29Here comes another one.
01:06:31Where?
01:06:32Blanche!
01:06:35Hurry, here's the hurry.
01:06:36Shut up.
01:06:37Steady, Freddy, steady.
01:06:38You got plenty of time.
01:06:39It takes a man minutes to strangle.
01:06:43Don't quit pulling that trigger, honey.
01:06:44Just do like Grandpa said.
01:06:45Squeeze the hand.
01:06:46Squeeze the whole hand like a bag of debt.
01:06:51Shut up.
01:06:52Shut up.
01:06:53Now for you, you rat.
01:06:54Steady.
01:06:55Just a nice, easy squeeze like a bag full of debt.
01:06:59Are you all right, boys?
01:07:00Charlie, charge.
01:07:01Put me down here, man.
01:07:02You, you rat.
01:07:03Open your eyes, will you?
01:07:04I tell you.
01:07:05Nobody could shoot that good.
01:07:06Open your eyes, will you?
01:07:07Or sneak out your tongue or do anything, will you?
01:07:08Just let me know that you're alive, will you?
01:07:12Wait a minute, Gus.
01:07:13Ain't them your boys down there?
01:07:14Well, what about it?
01:07:15Ain't that what we're fighting for?
01:07:16Oh, God, if it ain't.
01:07:17I tell them for God.
01:07:18I'll make a flag.
01:07:19What are you doing?
01:07:20Just one more for love.
01:07:42Open up.
01:07:45Open up.
01:07:47Open up.
01:07:48And how are my bouncing boys?
01:07:55And how is this one?
01:07:56Ah, making mountains out of mold skins like they all do.
01:07:59Imagine giving up a gold mine for a tramp like this.
01:08:02What can you see in him, anyway?
01:08:04I don't know.
01:08:05Probably the way his hair curls around his ears.
01:08:08I guess that's it.
01:08:09It's probably why I fell for him in the first place.
01:08:12I guess.
01:08:15Oh, hello, Mr. Jorgensen.
01:08:16Hello.
01:08:17I didn't know you were standing there.
01:08:19I'm sure glad to see you looking so good.
01:08:21I've been feeling pretty good.
01:08:24Thank you, Miss Jones.
01:08:27Oh.
01:08:28I've been terribly sorry, Miss Jones,
01:08:30but I've been thinking we've been taking a little trip together.
01:08:36To the impossibility.
01:08:38I've been thinking you've been shooting too good for sweet.
01:08:44I get you, Mr. Jorgensen.
01:08:45You should have left them both hanging up there.
01:08:47The more you do for these traps, the more you get it in the end.
01:08:50But why did you have to shoot them down, Freddy?
01:08:53I said shoot.
01:08:54And tip your mitt again.
01:08:55Couldn't you have done it with an axe?
01:08:56Or jackknife?
01:08:57Where's Blackie?
01:08:58I don't know.
01:08:59I suppose his...
01:09:00Isn't that lobster even gonna come over and see me take the raft?
01:09:03Want to sit here, madame?
01:09:04Merci.
01:09:05Merci beaucoup.
01:09:06Hello, darling.
01:09:07How you feel, Freddy?
01:09:08Glad to see you.
01:09:09Order in the court.
01:09:10Everyone rise and remove their hats.
01:09:13Come on.
01:09:14Come on.
01:09:15Come on.
01:09:16Come on.
01:09:17Come on.
01:09:18Come on.
01:09:19Come on.
01:09:20Come on.
01:09:21Come on.
01:09:22Come on.
01:09:23Come on.
01:09:24Come on.
01:09:25How you feel, Freddy?
01:09:26Glad to see you.
01:09:27Order in the court.
01:09:32Everyone rise and remove their hats.
01:09:34How do you do, your honor?
01:09:48I'm sure glad to see you.
01:09:49I sure hope you feel good.
01:09:51I feel great.
01:09:52I've been looking forward to this moment.
01:10:04Why don't you look at your door?
01:10:07Where I'm going?
01:10:08We only have my stronger glasses.
01:10:10Pick up your stuff.
01:10:11Huh?
01:10:14Shut up.
01:10:15Sit down and keep quiet.
01:10:18Now.
01:10:19Let's get this thing over with.
01:10:20I don't want to sit no longer than I have to.
01:10:23Everybody knows who did the shootings,
01:10:25who got shot,
01:10:26both times,
01:10:27and where the alleged crime occurred.
01:10:29What do I mean, alleged?
01:10:31So call your witnesses.
01:10:33Your honor,
01:10:34before this case goes any further,
01:10:36I'd like to ask your honor one favor.
01:10:38Well, make it a quick one.
01:10:39Out.
01:10:41I will not even attempt to tell your honor
01:10:43about the wonderful courage displayed by this young woman
01:10:46while this other Rube and I were hanging by our necks
01:10:48outside this bandit's loft.
01:10:50Our breath came in short pants.
01:10:52Our faces turned purple.
01:10:54Our eyes bulged out like pool balls.
01:10:56Our tongues were down to here.
01:10:57But she kept on,
01:10:58through the avalanche of bullets,
01:11:00the rain of lead,
01:11:01coolly and calmly,
01:11:03and shot us down without any more fuss than if...
01:11:05She'd been shooting at me.
01:11:07Oh, you don't mean that, your honor.
01:11:09You'd have been proud of her, just as I am.
01:11:12And that other time when you got nicked a little...
01:11:14Nicked a little?
01:11:15You have a talent for understatement, it is.
01:11:18Oh, I know.
01:11:19It's always worse to be the recipient.
01:11:20That's just where I got it, too.
01:11:21You ought to feel my recipient.
01:11:22I'm sure of it, your honor.
01:11:24But it was all a mistake,
01:11:25and if anybody's to blame, I am to blame.
01:11:28Very noble, but it isn't going to get you anywhere.
01:11:30I don't expect it to, your honor.
01:11:32All I'm trying to do is to tell your honor the truth,
01:11:34and ask one favor before the court convenes
01:11:37and this unfortunate young woman is...
01:11:39The court has already convened,
01:11:41and you're turning out to be quite a blabbermouth.
01:11:44If you think you're going to talk this blonde assassin out of a sentence,
01:11:48you've got another thing coming,
01:11:49because I'm going to stick her in a dungeon so deep and full of rats
01:11:52that when they go to find her,
01:11:54all they'll find is a little bundle of bones in a bag of dried skin.
01:11:58I know that, your honor.
01:12:01I know what you're going to do,
01:12:03and I wouldn't even try to change your honor's mind,
01:12:05because I know it can't be changed.
01:12:07All I ask is that before you do it to her,
01:12:09you give me the one chance to make amends,
01:12:11and show how sincere I feel about her,
01:12:13and join us in holy wedlock.
01:12:15Join you in holy wedlock?
01:12:17Why, they're dirty?
01:12:19Well, what do you know?
01:12:20Oh, no, you don't.
01:12:22You ain't going to get her out of this with anything that simple.
01:12:24I know it's hard for your honor to understand,
01:12:27because compared to people like your honor...
01:12:30We probably look like kind of terrible people.
01:12:32I mean being gamblers and shills.
01:12:34And singers and things like that.
01:12:36But way down deep, your honor.
01:12:38We're just the same as everybody else, your honor.
01:12:40We dream of little white cottages.
01:12:42With little white picket fences running around them.
01:12:44In the twilight.
01:12:45I was going to say the moonlight, your honor.
01:12:47The twilight's just as good, don't be fussy.
01:12:49And crickets chirping in the trees.
01:12:51And don't forget the pitter-patter of little baby feet.
01:12:53Oh, we haven't, your honor.
01:12:55We're crazy about them.
01:12:56Lots and lots of them.
01:12:58Paints a very pretty picture.
01:13:00You think you could really put up with this long drink of ink?
01:13:03Oh, he's not so bad, your honor.
01:13:05He's not so bad as he looks.
01:13:06I mean, way down deep, he's about as true and faithful as a...
01:13:10As a two-dollar trumpet.
01:13:12Don't go any further.
01:13:13You're breaking my heart.
01:13:14And I suppose you are madly in love with this bag full of trouble.
01:13:18Way down deep, I mean, of course.
01:13:19And are champing at the bit to love, honor, protect and support her in a style to which she's totally unaccustomed.
01:13:24Answer yes or no.
01:13:26Oh, she's not so bad, your honor.
01:13:28Way down deep, I mean.
01:13:29I'm a lard head to do this and I'll probably regret it the rest of my life.
01:13:33But I'm considering, only considering, mind you, suspending sentence in this case and...
01:13:39Oh, your honor.
01:13:40Shut up.
01:13:41I've heard enough out of you.
01:13:42Has anybody got a ring in the house?
01:13:44Oh, your honor.
01:13:47You can have mine.
01:13:49I do not need it anymore.
01:13:51Cut it, though.
01:13:52Oh, gee, that's terribly kind of you.
01:13:56It's nothing.
01:13:57I've nothing to remember and I don't want to remember anything.
01:14:01It came from Paris.
01:14:03For luck.
01:14:04Oh, gee, that's awful sweet of you.
01:14:06Darling, this is La Belle Berger.
01:14:09How do you do?
01:14:10How do you do?
01:14:11You are a lucky girl.
01:14:12I guess I am way down deep.
01:14:14A handsome dog.
01:14:15I suppose so, if you look at him in the right light.
01:14:17And what a dancer.
01:14:19Yeah.
01:14:20But how do you know?
01:14:22Oh.
01:14:23How do I know?
01:14:24Well, one kind of mushroom, these things, no?
01:14:26No.
01:14:27Not with him you can't.
01:14:28So that's the kind of...
01:14:29So that's the kind of poker you play while I'm spending the night in the calaboos.
01:14:32Ah, ah, ah, ah.
01:14:33Now, wait a minute, honey.
01:14:34I was only passing a little time.
01:14:35Yeah, now I know who you were passing it with you, two-faced, triple-timing.
01:14:38Now, take it easy, will you, baby?
01:14:39Now, wait a minute.
01:14:40Is this any way to...
01:14:41Cut it out, will you, baby?
01:14:43You, you cross-eyed, lost-faced wrinkle, no...
01:14:46Wait a minute, honey.
01:14:47Oh, if I just had a gun.
01:14:49Look out!
01:14:51Now, stop that, buddy.
01:14:53You've learned your lesson.
01:14:56Stop that!
01:14:57Order in the court!
01:14:58Don't give it to her, Sheriff.
01:14:59Don't give it to her!
01:15:00Look out!
01:15:05Stop that!
01:15:06Order in the court!
01:15:07Somebody got it!
01:15:08Look out!
01:15:09Stop it!
01:15:10Don't give it to her, Sheriff!
01:15:11Don't give it to her!
01:15:12Don't give it to her!
01:15:13Look out!
01:15:14Look out!
01:15:15Look out!
01:15:16Look out!
01:15:19Look out!
01:15:21Give me this.
01:15:23I'll get it.
01:15:25I'll get it.
01:15:27Look out.
01:15:28Freddie, wait.
01:15:29I'll get it.
01:15:31Let me have it.
01:15:32Let me have it.
01:15:33Look out!
01:15:34Look out!
01:15:35Don't!
01:15:36Stop!
01:15:37Look out!
01:15:38Look out!
01:15:39Oh, say it ain't so.
01:15:44Get out!
01:15:45Get out of the way!
01:15:46Get out of the way!
01:15:49Shh!
01:15:51Tell me it didn't happen.
01:15:54When it comes to him, you never miss.
01:15:56Oh, no.
01:15:57No.
01:15:58Well, here we go again.
01:16:00Three times for luck, I always say.
01:16:02Oh, that beautiful blonde from Bashful Bend.
01:16:07Never did learn to keep a friend.
01:16:10She'd give him a start, then shoot him in the end.
01:16:13Shoot him in the end.
01:16:14Shoot him in the end.
01:16:15Yee-haw!
01:16:16Yee-haw!
01:16:17That hard-tootin', free-bootin', sick-shootin' beautiful blonde.
01:16:21That beautiful blonde from Bashful Bend.
01:16:30He's maybe like now and even h existing.
01:16:32It's up and so long.
01:16:33It was too late.
01:16:34Yeah, okay.
01:16:35Good to see you.
01:16:36You're so happy with her.
01:16:37Seema in the end.
01:16:38I can't see her barely looking.
01:16:39That towed went on board, door!
01:16:40I can't see her sweater.
01:16:41Alright, thanks.
01:16:42I'm sorry.
01:16:43I got caught up.
01:16:45Chill out.
01:16:45He was loads with hanging hands.
01:16:46All right, we're shoulders.
01:16:47From here I am.
01:16:48exhausted betweenessä,
01:16:51Melinda and what's going to be looking at this thing?
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