What Happens if a Client gets an Erection_(360P)

What happens if a client gets erection.                By           Kashif Mag

Transcript

00:00well y'all it's that time again i've been getting more and more and more and more and more

00:13more this question and i address it about every year maybe every six months so i guess this is

00:19it's time again by the way hi my name is keely i'm a cuddle therapist thank you for putting this

00:26question in the way that you did not everyone is as wonderfully respectful and asking something that

00:31everyone is genuinely curious about so thank you for being really respectful and it's very normal to

00:38ask this question and y'all erections happen they do they're really not a big deal i've been doing this

00:49work for almost 10 years like your body anyone who has a body that does that it's just doing what

00:57it's designed to do the thing about it is we don't have to act on it we don't have to do anything

01:06with it about it part of our agreement in the work that i do the integrity piece of it

01:13is that we know and we are committing and promising to each other that we're not going to pursue

01:21gratification we're not going to bring intention into the session that's sexual in nature we're

01:29going to maintain our intention as platonic and deep connection and deep care and kindness and compassion

01:37and we keep it in that realm i want to take a quick second to uh give a quick shout out to emily

01:45nagosky if you don't know who dr emily nagosky is i highly recommend the books that this person has

01:51written they're great but one of the things that they talk about is something called arousal non-concordance

01:57take a look at that if anyone take gets like a little educational note from this video go google what

02:03that is your body is going to do what your body's going to do but that doesn't dictate your actions

02:09it doesn't even mean anything deeper than your body is noticing it is in a familiar situation and

02:17as adults in our culture our touch deprived culture the only time we really get the opportunity to cuddle

02:24people for many of us in our adulthood is in relationships where it's going to lead somewhere

02:32almost immediately your body has conditions response remember pavlov it's a conditioned response

02:40it's a normal bodily function if either person is uncomfortable we simply adjust that's it no

02:49heaviness no no need for more worry or anxiety or stress if either person is uncomfortable we adjust

02:58we do that if our arm falls asleep right we ever been in that moment where you're cuddling and your

03:03arm kind of falls asleep well just adjust slightly so that you get the blood flow back to your arm and you

03:09don't you're not sitting there with those pins and needles feeling right it doesn't have to mean

03:16anything it doesn't have to mean anything odd or awkward and also if those feelings come like a bit of the

03:23awkwardness or sometimes shame will come up that's okay we can sit there and be present for that

03:30emotion that's some of the really good stuff about the therapy part of cuddle therapy it's like oh

03:36something came up for you there what's the emotion that's coming up around that what's the nervousness

03:41can we make some space for it can be kind and compassionate to it

03:45i know it's not like the salacious answer most people want i feel like what a lot i don't i don't

03:55think the commenter wants this that's not what i'm saying but i feel like some people are gonna

03:59think that this is this big taboo thing and i'm good it's gonna be a whole thing and it's like just

04:03absolutely not an issue your body's just being i i wouldn't my my personal reaction to it wouldn't

04:11be any more severe if someone like had to pause for a moment to sneeze like oh excuse me achoo and

04:17then like we went back to cuddling like i wouldn't i wouldn't be upset with them because their body just

04:23did a thing that bodies do any more than if they got an erection in a session like your body's just

04:29doing your body okay i will stop there uh feel free to ask any questions about this i am totally

04:34comfortable talking about it i just talk about a lot um and there's so many other really wonderful

04:39things to this work but feel free to ask any additional questions and thank you for this one