South Beach Academy_1996

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What do you do when the future of your school, your family, and your fortune all rest on the performance of the school's all-female volleyball team? It's up to two brothers and a steamy student body to save the day.   *  #watchfreemovie  #watcnow  #fullmovie  #watchonlinemovie  #freestreaming  #StreamingNow  #MovieRecommendations  #MustWatch  #ClassicMovies  #Thriller  #Mystery  #WatchOnline  #TopRatedMovies  #CinemaLovers  #DramaFilm  #ForeignFilms  #AwardWinning  #MovieOfTheDay  #InstantClassic  #FeelGoodMovies  #RetroMovies  #MovieClips  #BestCinematography  #StreamingTonight  #LateNightMovies  #RomanticDrama  #Top10Movies  #PopcornTime  #MovieMarathon  #LoveStory  #romanticmovie  #WatchFree  #FreeMoviesOnline  #FilmOfTheYear  #BestMoviesEver  #Comedy  #FunnyMovie  #mustwatchmovie  #Movie  #Film  #filme  #Movies  #FullMovies  #ActionMovies  #ComedyMovies  #HorrorMovies  #DramaMovies  #RomanticMovies  #ThrillerMovies  #EuropeanFilms  #europeanmovie  #FrenchCinema  #SpanishMovies  #ItalianFilms  #GermanMovies  #EuropeanMovieClips  #EuropeanFilmFestival  #BestEuropeanMovies  #TopEuropeanFilms  #ClassicEuropeanCinema  #EuropeanDramaFilms  #EuropeanFilmAwards  #ScandinavianMovies  #EuropeanHorrorFilms  #EuropeanComedyMovies  #EuropeanArtFilms  #EuropeanIndieFilms

Transcript

00:00:30And a loud guitar

00:00:32When it's all over and done

00:00:34They'll tell you I'm the one

00:00:36Who always went too far

00:00:38I want to soar like a seagull

00:00:40And live like a king

00:00:42All I want is everything

00:00:44Under the sun

00:00:51Summer days and big seas

00:00:54The world's at my command

00:00:57I'll ride the waves and build my dreams

00:01:00My castle's in the sand

00:01:03Even when the tide comes crashing

00:01:07Tearing at the castle walls

00:01:10Even through life's chain reaction

00:01:13You won't see me fall

00:01:16Cause I want everything under the sun

00:01:19I want girls and money and a loud guitar

00:01:23When it's all over and done

00:01:25They'll tell you I'm the one

00:01:27Who always went too far

00:01:29I want to soar like a seagull

00:01:31And live like a king

00:01:33All I want is everything

00:01:35Under the sun

00:01:42Suddenly I realized

00:01:45Life can be so strange

00:01:48When I looked into your eyes

00:01:51I felt the whole world change

00:01:54Now the thing I dream about

00:01:57Is lying with you on the beach

00:02:01When you're wrapped up in my arms

00:02:04Nothing's out of reach

00:02:06Cause I got everything under the sun

00:02:10I don't need no money or a fancy car

00:02:14Baby I know you're the one

00:02:16Cause you make me feel just like a movie star

00:02:20I want to soar like a seagull

00:02:22And live like a king

00:02:24Cause girl you give me everything

00:02:26Under the sun

00:02:39Cause I got everything under the sun

00:02:42I don't need no money or a fancy car

00:02:46Baby I know you're the one

00:02:49Cause you make me feel just like a movie star

00:02:52I want to soar like a seagull

00:02:54And live like a king

00:02:56Cause girl you give me everything

00:03:19Under the sun

00:03:50Under the sun

00:03:52Under the sun

00:03:54Under the sun

00:03:58Johnny Staccato was a high-living lowlife,

00:04:01And if I didn't get what I came for,

00:04:02He'd be living even higher off the millions he'd scam

00:04:05From my weird Uncle Gene.

00:04:07The two of them have been mortal enemies for a decade now,

00:04:09And it was my job to save my uncle's butt.

00:04:14Hi.

00:04:15Hi.

00:04:16Do me a favor, and do me.

00:04:18Pardon me?

00:04:19Start with my legs.

00:04:21Work your way up.

00:04:28Do I know you?

00:04:29The name's Spencer, Harry Spencer.

00:04:31Spencer?

00:04:33You must be a private eye.

00:04:36No, I'm not a PI.

00:04:36Actually, I'm a teacher.

00:04:38A teacher?

00:04:40Boring.

00:04:41Huh?

00:04:42Listen, pal, all my friends teach.

00:04:45Tonya over there heads the physics department at Yale.

00:04:52Am I bothering you?

00:04:53Extremely.

00:04:56So are you an educated girl?

00:04:57Harvard.

00:04:59Tell me, Harry, where did you go to school?

00:05:02Well, I managed to graduate from the North Dakota

00:05:04Teachers and Pipefitters Junior Mail Order College.

00:05:08Then I managed to get a teaching gig over at the Beach Academy.

00:05:11Wow, the Beach Academy?

00:05:13Vincent!

00:05:18Babes just seem to dig the Academy.

00:05:23I hate to kiss and run, but I got to save my girl.

00:05:26Now, on most days, I would go with the flow.

00:05:28In fact, I taught a few classes in it at the Academy.

00:05:31But that's another story.

00:05:32This was definitely not most days.

00:05:35Everything I wanted out of life depended on what

00:05:37would happen in the next hour.

00:05:39Frank, where is Johnny?

00:05:43Oh!

00:05:54Whoa!

00:06:04Aha!

00:06:09Standing at the foot of the bed, menacing Channon,

00:06:12The only woman I would ever love was a total mega-psycho dirtbag one Johnny Staccato.

00:06:18A really bad, good fellow, wise guy, gangster type dude.

00:06:22And his partner Rico was even worse.

00:06:25Oh, hi Harry.

00:06:28How you doing, huh? Nice of you to drop by.

00:06:31Hey Johnny, so where's Rico?

00:06:35Rico? Hell, long gone, man.

00:06:38You stay partners with some scum-sucking slimeball who would bad-mouth you,

00:06:42steal from you and try to screw your wife?

00:06:45No, I guess not.

00:06:47Neither did Rico.

00:06:50I got him.

00:06:54You know what I like about you, Johnny?

00:06:57What?

00:06:59Absolutely nothing.

00:07:02Hey, you're some kind of a wise guy or something.

00:07:07I'm going to stay up nights making sure that you screw this one up.

00:07:12Look, Johnny, I just took a little break at halftime, thought I'd come by, shoot the breeze, rescue my girl, you know?

00:07:17Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know what I'm going to do for you?

00:07:20Drop dead right here on the floor?

00:07:22No, Michael Jackson.

00:07:28Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop.

00:07:31I guess you're wondering exactly how I got myself into this mess.

00:07:34Well, it all began at the beach one week ago.

00:07:38South Beach, Florida. Hip, hot, happening.

00:07:42Sun, sand, surf and...

00:07:45skin.

00:07:47The sky an unreal azure blue,

00:07:50the foam on the white caps sparkling like the shimmering cool surface of a perfect margarita.

00:08:01It was the day Billy the Kid came to town.

00:08:03We both grew up in a nowhere town where the buses don't run.

00:08:07I'd been down here for a couple of years on the case, but Billy?

00:08:10Billy was totally turned on by the whole Miami scene.

00:08:28The moment he saw her, he fell instantly, totally in lust.

00:08:32Billy decided to give up on the maximum excitement of another 20 below winter in North Dakota

00:08:37and follow me into the sun.

00:08:56Hey, chick.

00:08:59Hey, chick.

00:09:01Well, it was the best thing I could think of at the moment.

00:09:03Listen, I, uh...

00:09:05I, um...

00:09:06I, um...

00:09:07I, um...

00:09:08I, um...

00:09:09Oh, hey, chick.

00:09:10Followed through with the classic, I, uh...

00:09:12This is beautiful.

00:09:13Where are you from?

00:09:14Well, I...

00:09:15Actually, what I wanted was...

00:09:16I wanted to ask you a question.

00:09:17I was wondering if maybe...

00:09:19No, I...

00:09:20I know.

00:09:21You're wondering if we could go out on a date, right?

00:09:22And...

00:09:23I'm not my type.

00:09:24Uh...

00:09:25I was wondering if maybe there was a possibility...

00:09:29You know, no offense or anything, because I can tell you're not from around here,

00:09:32but I was looking for something just a little higher on the food chain.

00:09:35Listen, what I wanted to know is if you know my brother.

00:09:37His name is Harry Spencer.

00:09:40Harry Spencer?

00:09:41From the Beach Academy?

00:09:42Yeah.

00:09:43You're his brother?

00:09:45Yeah.

00:09:47I'm so sorry.

00:09:48You know, sometimes a girl gets hit on so much here at the beach, she gets punched.

00:09:52No, Harry's a good friend of mine.

00:09:54My name's Harley.

00:09:55Hi, Harley. Nice to meet you.

00:09:56My name's Billy Spencer.

00:09:57How are you?

00:09:58Pleasure.

00:09:59Pleasure.

00:10:00Uh...

00:10:01Listen, since you mentioned it, maybe there is a chance, you know, we could, like, have lunch?

00:10:07No.

00:10:08No?

00:10:09No.

00:10:10Well, I didn't think so, actually, because I didn't really want to, because I hate lunch,

00:10:13because, you know, fills you up in the middle of the day, you can't exercise, no swimming.

00:10:18Well, is lunch anything like dinner?

00:10:21Actually, it's exactly like dinner.

00:10:23Um...

00:10:24But it costs more.

00:10:25But that's okay, I can afford it.

00:10:26No problem.

00:10:27Dinner?

00:10:29Okay, it's a date, then.

00:10:31A date?

00:10:32Yeah.

00:10:33Cool.

00:10:34Because I was just on my way to the gym before you almost killed me in your car.

00:10:36Right.

00:10:37And, um, let me see, I have thighs at noon, buns at three.

00:10:40She said buns.

00:10:42Buns are cool.

00:10:45I was thinking maybe I could squeeze you in the middle.

00:10:47I love to be squeezed in the middle.

00:10:49That's, like, one of my favorite things, how did you know?

00:10:51Okay, it's a date, then.

00:10:53Oh, wait, no, better yet, why don't you come catch my act?

00:10:56You have an act.

00:10:58Doesn't every girl?

00:11:00I guess you're right.

00:11:02Thanks.

00:11:03Yes.

00:11:04All right, I'll see you, then.

00:11:05All right.

00:11:06All right.

00:11:09Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.

00:11:14The Beach Academy.

00:11:23What are you doing?

00:11:26Are you a cadet here?

00:11:29I'll see you later.

00:11:31Move it!

00:11:39A surfside school for beach bums and babes to learn swimming, surfing, jet skiing, beach volleyball.

00:11:45Well, you get the picture.

00:11:47The school is fully accredited, and since its opening this very year,

00:11:50has brought top students from all over the world.

00:11:52It's a growing little gold mine owned entirely by my weird uncle Gene,

00:11:56or as he is affectionately known by the students, Dean Gene.

00:12:00He's a compulsive gambler, dean of the Beach Academy,

00:12:03and sole proprietor of the infamous Baja Beach Club.

00:12:08The boys were good.

00:12:10They should be, after all. I taught them.

00:12:13Damn, after all these years, it felt fine to be a winner.

00:12:16Even if our opponents were a little... effeminate.

00:12:31I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

00:12:33Go, go, go!

00:12:43It was then I saw her for the first time.

00:12:46The closer she got, the better she looked.

00:12:49I would come to know and love this exceptional lady.

00:12:52To me, she was the most beautiful girl in the world.

00:12:56Go, go, go!

00:13:02If you want to give me a point or two here, you better do that.

00:13:05Seriously, you guys look great.

00:13:07Do what you're doing!

00:13:13She was headed right on past the game and out of my life when...

00:13:26Go, go, go!

00:13:42She turned and smiled at me.

00:13:45And suddenly the world was filled with singing, light, hope, magic.

00:13:50I just love a winner.

00:13:52And indeed, in that brief shining moment, I truly believed myself a winner.

00:13:59This heavenly creature actually smiled at me.

00:14:02What could possibly go wrong?

00:14:04Hey, hey, you, big dummy!

00:14:09Well, you still remember your name. Ain't that something?

00:14:12Listen, another 50k on my bad boys.

00:14:15Glad to take your money, old fart.

00:14:17Old fart?

00:14:20You are a lump of steroid leftover.

00:14:23My nephew's team will beat the shorts out of your team.

00:14:26Uncle Gene, you're winning.

00:14:28Just be nice and take the man's money. Don't let this get out of control.

00:14:31And you, stop taking bets.

00:14:33You don't have a chance in hell of winning. This is bordering on the masochistic.

00:14:36Maso-what? You're Disney, dude.

00:14:39Maso-what? Maso-what?

00:14:44This guy's a moron.

00:14:47A moronski!

00:14:49A moronski? I'm an American.

00:14:59Let me let you in on a little secret.

00:15:02I don't like you, Harry. I don't like you a whole lot.

00:15:06I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.

00:15:08First, I'm gonna beat your team.

00:15:11That's public. That's business.

00:15:13And that's for Johnny.

00:15:16Then I'm gonna beat you uptown and repeatedly.

00:15:21And that's pleasure. That's private.

00:15:24That's for me.

00:15:26I see.

00:15:32All right, Saturday night. On the beach, you and me.

00:15:34Why wait till Saturday?

00:15:37I just want it to be a little closer to your shower night.

00:15:40Excuse me.

00:15:46That a boy, guys!

00:15:48Smash him!

00:15:50I just want you to know I appreciate your confidence.

00:15:53But you've already got $200,000 on the game as it is.

00:15:56Listen, winning is great.

00:15:59Winning is American.

00:16:01And winning is what I like to do.

00:16:07Next Saturday night, dude.

00:16:09Yeah, I got the fever.

00:16:11I am dead.

00:16:14Isn't it great, Harry?

00:16:16Yes, this is truly great.

00:16:24Can I train him or can I train him? What do you think, huh?

00:16:27I think I under-bet.

00:16:31You know, you can lighten up. It's only a game.

00:16:33You don't have to bet the front.

00:16:35No, no, no, no, no. Life is only a game.

00:16:38This is game.

00:16:40Life is only a game.

00:16:42This is game.

00:16:44It's not just winning.

00:16:46It's for me to get the chance to kick that rat ass,

00:16:49Johnny Staccato, once and for all.

00:16:54After that stinking moon-covered slime piece of maggot-eating flesh,

00:16:59I want to grind his face into the sand.

00:17:06I feel like I want to take him for every damn dime he's got.

00:17:09I want to totally humiliate him.

00:17:12I get the point.

00:17:14But will you please just do it next game?

00:17:16Are you kidding me?

00:17:18What is the matter with you, child?

00:17:20After a defeat like this and a big one like this,

00:17:22you think there's gonna be a next game?

00:17:25Come on, fella.

00:17:27I mean, Johnny Staccato, he may be a degenerate murderer,

00:17:31but he's not stupid.

00:17:35Fella.

00:17:40Oh!

00:17:45Another 200K on the academy, you big dummy.

00:17:50Got a hell of a lot of cash to burn, Baldy.

00:17:53No more bets, okay?

00:17:55Okay, I promise.

00:18:02Oh!

00:18:05Come on, any more bets?

00:18:08Okay, that's it, gentlemen.

00:18:10No more bets.

00:18:12What about it, Genie Weenie?

00:18:14One final bet?

00:18:22I dream of Genie with a hat full of hair.

00:18:28If not a bald spot,

00:18:31alligator breath.

00:18:34A solar panel for a sex machine.

00:18:37Honey child,

00:18:39even on a desert island,

00:18:41the best is gonna get the most.

00:18:45Erica!

00:18:47Okay, girls, let's take this button out.

00:18:50Yeah, let's go, come on!

00:19:02Suddenly, my undefeated team was being humiliated

00:19:06and demoralized right before my very eyes.

00:19:17It was down to one point.

00:19:19Sudden death.

00:19:22Kate Wandy!

00:19:26Come on!

00:19:31Come on!

00:19:39You better have the money ready in the morning.

00:19:41Johnny's not a patient man.

00:19:43Be ready.

00:19:47I was in deep, deep trouble.

00:19:49Not only had my team lost,

00:19:51but Uncle Gene, who had so much faith in me,

00:19:53had lost a small fortune.

00:19:55I had let everybody down.

00:19:57Like I said, I love a winner.

00:20:00And lost my dream girl.

00:20:02But then, I had an idea.

00:20:14Excuse me, excuse me.

00:20:17Look, uh, was that an accident?

00:20:19What?

00:20:20That fantastic thing you did with the volleyball.

00:20:22How did you do it?

00:20:23Pretty well, I thought.

00:20:25Yeah, what I mean is, where'd you learn to hit a ball like that?

00:20:27Are you a professional or something?

00:20:28Close.

00:20:30I was the leader of the U.S. Women's Olympic Volleyball Team.

00:20:33Yeah, but I watched those games. I never saw you.

00:20:35The night I was supposed to leave for Barcelona,

00:20:37something happened that made it impossible for me to go.

00:20:40But I didn't hear anything.

00:20:42Look, I gotta run. It's a long story.

00:20:44But not out of my life, I hope.

00:20:46I'm Harry Spencer.

00:20:48Pleased to meet you, Harry.

00:20:50I'm Shannon McSorrel.

00:20:52Hi, I'm Bresti. I mean Billy.

00:20:54I'm Billy Spencer.

00:20:55Hi.

00:20:56What's up, bro?

00:20:57Billy!

00:20:58How you doing, man?

00:20:59Bro, man, why don't you call me? Tell me you're coming.

00:21:01It was a spur-of-the-moment decision earlier.

00:21:03Whew!

00:21:04Well, I'm glad you're here, man.

00:21:06I'm also glad you missed the game I just coached. We got creamed.

00:21:08Hey, it wasn't your fault.

00:21:10You were set up.

00:21:11Set up?

00:21:12Wake up and smell the coffee, pal.

00:21:13Trust me, those babes are all ringers.

00:21:15Yeah.

00:21:16Yeah, I guess it seems pretty obvious now.

00:21:18Damn, am I a schmuck.

00:21:20Yeah, that's true. I didn't want to be the one to say it,

00:21:22but since you came right out with it, I'm pretty happy about that.

00:21:25Look, we can all go somewhere.

00:21:27Maybe have some coffee.

00:21:29Sorry, I'm off caffeine.

00:21:31Or a bite to eat?

00:21:32I don't do lunch, and I have to run to another appointment.

00:21:34Well, you know, if I'm getting in the way, I can just leave,

00:21:36because I sent a terrible, dramatic thing going on here.

00:21:39You were meshing, and now you're not, so I'll leave.

00:21:42You know, I can just blend into the crowd.

00:21:44No, I'm gone. Just assume me histy. Gone.

00:21:47Okay? Stay? Fine, I will.

00:21:50Very good.

00:21:51So?

00:21:52So...

00:21:54So where do we meet later?

00:21:56Oh, uh, the marina. Slip F18.

00:21:59See you at 6. Slip F18.

00:22:02Okay.

00:22:03Bye.

00:22:04Bye.

00:22:05Bye-bye.

00:22:07Well, bro, I can't believe you've done it again.

00:22:10It amazes me.

00:22:20I think I want to do something useful.

00:22:22I want to put my skills to work.

00:22:24I want to help in whatever way I can

00:22:26to restore the vibrancy of the Beach Academy.

00:22:29Well, that's interesting, Kiserian.

00:22:31You can't surf, swim, play volleyball, build a sandcastle.

00:22:34Hey, I resemble that remark.

00:22:36As a matter of fact, I happen to be one of the world-renowned sandcastle builders.

00:22:40All right, how about if we start you out with, uh,

00:22:43helping out with beginner volleyball?

00:22:45Oh, now, there's something interesting I think not.

00:22:48That's something I would be completely bored with.

00:22:51You know, I was thinking, like, something good, you know?

00:22:54Something I could sink my teeth into.

00:22:56Something like, uh, Advanced Sun Tan Oil Application 101.

00:23:03How's that sound?

00:23:05Where are you going?

00:23:06Why are you leaving?

00:23:07I thought that was good.

00:23:08I happen to be, I have a class, I have a certificate.

00:23:12But I thought Olympic athletes

00:23:14weren't supposed to get involved in stuff like that.

00:23:16Right.

00:23:17But my teammates and I didn't know the real deal until it was too late.

00:23:20This crooked gambler sucked us into what we thought

00:23:23was a charity athletic program, and, uh,

00:23:25the only charity turned out to be

00:23:27the Slimeballs Offshore Banking Act.

00:23:29Wow. I'm sorry.

00:23:31Not as sorry as I am.

00:23:33The heat fell on me and on my coach,

00:23:35and, uh, I think I'm going to have to quit.

00:23:38Yes, I am.

00:23:39The heat fell on me and on my coach, Sean.

00:23:42Sean, your boyfriend?

00:23:44No.

00:23:45Husband?

00:23:46Brother. My kid brother.

00:23:48The scam killed my Olympic chances,

00:23:50and, um, it put Sean in jail.

00:23:53Oh, I understand that.

00:23:55Keeping my kid brother out of trouble used to be my full-time job.

00:23:59So, the other teammates, you ever talk to them?

00:24:01Yeah, all the time. They're my best friends.

00:24:04I suppose they live all over the country, though, huh?

00:24:06Well, originally, yeah, but after a long Olympic training,

00:24:09we just grew so close, we all settled here.

00:24:11Here in the Miami area?

00:24:13Miami, Palm Beach, Lauderdale.

00:24:15Yeah, we love it down here.

00:24:17Yeah, well, what's not to love?

00:24:20Yeah, what's not to love?

00:24:24So, you ever get the urge to get the old team back together again, you know?

00:24:27Yeah, every day.

00:24:29But don't get any ideas.

00:24:31I got burned too badly, and I'm out of the game for good.

00:24:35I understand.

00:24:37I believe that, Harry. I really do.

00:24:41You seem to be a sensitive and decent guy.

00:24:44So, what am I going to do with you?

00:24:47Keep you close till you find out.

00:24:53So, this is where you live?

00:24:55Yeah, this is home sweet home.

00:24:59You know, this isn't real champagne.

00:25:02Real champagne tickles my nose.

00:25:04Yeah, well, this stuff eats it away.

00:25:06Yeah.

00:25:09Do you have to go?

00:25:11Definitely.

00:25:13Eventually.

00:25:15Oh, yeah. One more bottle of cheap champagne coming up.

00:25:18So.

00:25:21Reach. Reach. Come on, girls.

00:25:24Reach.

00:25:27That's it. Come on.

00:25:29Come here.

00:25:32Get over here. Get over here. Get over here.

00:25:38Reach. Reach. Reach. Reach.

00:25:57No one will know, babe.

00:25:59Got my ace in the hole.

00:26:07Hi. Hi, there. Hi. Hi. Hi.

00:26:11Hello. Hi, there.

00:26:15Very good. Deuce.

00:26:19You know, if a guy can't get laid in this town, he might as well just cut off his weenie.

00:26:26Maybe I'm thinking of someone else, but I thought you were still a virgin.

00:26:32A virgin. A virgin.

00:26:35I'm a virgin. Yeah. Oh, I'm a virgin.

00:26:37Yeah. Right.

00:26:39Of course I'm a virgin.

00:26:41Shut up, would you?

00:26:43God.

00:26:44You know, I decided I have a plan.

00:26:46I'm gonna just build one huge sperm bank and spread it all over South Florida.

00:26:51All right, listen, before you go nuts out here,

00:26:54take it from your big brother, there's a lot of fun in numbers, but nothing substantial.

00:26:59If you find one good relationship out here, you should cling to it.

00:27:01It's worth a hundred superficial ones.

00:27:03You know, and that's funny, because I'm the kind of guy who would definitely go for the hundred superficial ones.

00:27:07I mean, I like breasts.

00:27:12Fake breasts. I mean, you know, they do it for me.

00:27:15Yeah, I know.

00:27:17Listen, for some odd reason, Harley seems to dig you.

00:27:19Ooh, that's odd. Yeah, that's strange.

00:27:22Can't figure that one out.

00:27:24But, you know, I was just wondering, what do you know about her?

00:27:27I mean, is she, like, you know, smooth to ride, or is it kind of rough around the edges, rocky?

00:27:33You know, good and bad, basically, is what I'm asking you.

00:27:36Look, whatever happened between Harley and me is strictly between Harley and me.

00:27:39You should take her out.

00:27:41Get to know her a little bit on your own.

00:27:43You know, build something.

00:27:45Yeah. Yeah.

00:27:47No, that sounds like too much work.

00:27:50It is. It's a lot of work, but it's worth it in the end.

00:27:52In the end.

00:28:14You behave yourself, young man.

00:28:16Okay, you got it.

00:28:21Yeah, check her out, man.

00:28:43Damn, check her out, man.

00:28:51Boing!

00:28:59Gotta give me some of that.

00:29:02Dang!

00:29:21Uncle Gene!

00:29:25Oh, hey.

00:29:29Hey!

00:29:31Never let your guard down.

00:29:33He's already got a little thing going with Harley.

00:29:35Oh, that's a hell of a gal.

00:29:37Hey!

00:29:39Gets pretty young for his old age, huh?

00:29:41Listen, Uncle Gene, I'd love to stay and play, but I gotta go watch my girl, okay?

00:29:45Oh, good boy. Good boy, Billy.

00:29:49If we had had that girl, Shannon, in the days that ate, we would have won big, huh?

00:29:53Yeah, that might be so, Uncle Gene, but I don't want to take advantage of this girl.

00:29:56She's definitely marriage material.

00:29:58Of course, that's exactly what I was thinking.

00:30:01Yeah.

00:30:19So you can stop your looking around

00:30:23Now that you've found me

00:30:26I'm the one you want

00:30:29I'm the one you need

00:30:33It's payoff time, Baldy.

00:30:35I will take care of that crime, Johnny, in person.

00:30:39When?

00:30:40When I'm good and ready.

00:30:42Oh, tomorrow.

00:30:43Okay, moronski.

00:30:48What?

00:30:49Moronski?

00:30:50Another country in Europe.

00:30:52Now that you've found me

00:30:55I'm the one you want

00:30:58Baby, I'm the one you need

00:31:03So you can stop your looking around

00:31:06Now that you've found me

00:31:10I'm the one you want

00:31:39Just don't do anything stupid.

00:31:43Yeah, he's good.

00:31:45Five hundred thousand.

00:31:47The man has come through.

00:31:49Hey, Gene, babe.

00:31:51How are you doing?

00:31:53Johnny, you're a liar, a cheat, and a total sleazebag.

00:31:58And you know what that's going to get you?

00:32:00My own talk show.

00:32:02Funny.

00:32:05The hatred of thousands of innocent people.

00:32:07Promise?

00:32:09You know, that's a great bonus.

00:32:11Hey, you know, you want to play double or nothing?

00:32:16What?

00:32:17Double or nothing.

00:32:18You got nothing and I got doubles.

00:32:22I like you, Gene.

00:32:24But you got the heart and soul of a real gambler

00:32:28and you got money.

00:32:29So I'm going to give you a second chance

00:32:31at rematching pin rods next Saturday.

00:32:34On the beach?

00:32:36Of course.

00:32:37And your nephew here, hairy boy,

00:32:40he can use his old team to play or any team to play.

00:32:45Oh, yeah.

00:32:47Yeah, and when we win?

00:32:49If you win.

00:32:51If you win, I'll forgive your old debt

00:32:54and give you two million bucks on top of it.

00:32:58How's that, huh?

00:32:59And I get your yacht and your clothes.

00:33:03And I get your yacht and your club.

00:33:07Hey, you got cojones the size of Kuwait.

00:33:11And if you lose,

00:33:14you sign the deed to the beach academy over to me.

00:33:17No, no way.

00:33:18The beachfront school grounds alone are assessed

00:33:20at over $12 million plus the buildings.

00:33:22The profit potential is huge. No.

00:33:24All right.

00:33:26If you don't want the deal,

00:33:27then just give me back the money you owe.

00:33:32You'll have your cash in the morning.

00:33:35Ah, you know, I thought you were a real betting man.

00:33:39But you're nothing but a wimp.

00:33:41Damn you.

00:33:44You want to bet like that?

00:33:47You didn't think you were that stupid.

00:33:49Well, you got a dumb deal.

00:33:53Dream!

00:34:03Out of the water! Out of the water!

00:34:05Move it! Come on! Come on! Come on!

00:34:07Move it! Move it! Move it!

00:34:09Come on!

00:34:11What are you smiling at, huh?

00:34:13You think this is for fun? Huh?

00:34:16You think this is for fun? Huh?

00:34:19You think this is for fun? Huh?

00:34:22All right, hit the beach! Shell detail!

00:34:24Hit the beach! Get moving!

00:34:27Come on! Come on!

00:34:29Good shot.

00:34:38You not only lost the academy, you lost your mind.

00:34:41We don't have a team.

00:34:43Translation, we don't have a prayer.

00:34:45We do, Harry. Listen to this.

00:34:48I found out that your girlfriend

00:34:51is an olympic-class volleyball player

00:34:54and all her former teammates live in the Miami area.

00:34:57I already know that.

00:34:59And I also know that she has no intention of getting back into the limelight,

00:35:02especially not with volleyball.

00:35:06Oh, gee, don't tell me you were counting on her and her friends to play.

00:35:11Awful me.

00:35:13I was counting on you and...

00:35:16You never fail.

00:35:18I can vouch for that.

00:35:21Gene, you're my uncle.

00:35:23I care about you. I respect you.

00:35:25You're my favorite uncle.

00:35:27But you have gone seriously north of normal on this, okay?

00:35:30Now, what part of she won't play don't you understand?

00:35:33Well, not even for you?

00:35:35Hell no. If she's not gonna play to save her career,

00:35:37she's not gonna play for some strangers.

00:35:39What do you mean, strangers?

00:35:41Harry, I was under the impression that...

00:35:44I mean, you're more than a stranger to her.

00:35:48A lot more. That's the whole point.

00:35:50She's not some bimbo to be sweet-talked.

00:35:52Look, look, look, I mean, if we win, I'll give the bimbo...

00:35:56Sorry, I slipped.

00:35:58I'll let the ladies' team share $1 million.

00:36:03Gene, I would do anything for you.

00:36:06And I don't need a million or even $100 million to do it.

00:36:09What I need is for you to understand that I really care about Shannon.

00:36:12And I won't exploit her.

00:36:14Not for money, not for anything.

00:36:21Harry.

00:36:23Harry, you gotta do it for me, Harry.

00:36:26I'm Gene, your... your favorite uncle.

00:36:29Huh? Right?

00:36:31You gotta do it for me. If you don't...

00:36:33Harry, Harry, if you don't, I'm...

00:36:36I'm finished! Kaput!

00:36:39Just once. Once.

00:36:42Please?

00:36:48I'll think about it.

00:36:50I was a man with a problem. A big problem.

00:36:54If I told Shannon the real deal, she was gonna totally freak out on me.

00:36:58I knew she was not gonna play some beach ball game...

00:37:01just so that Uncle Gene could indulge in his gambling passion.

00:37:04And she was not a girl moved by money.

00:37:07She was not.

00:37:14Light it up! Face front!

00:37:16What are you looking at?

00:37:21All right, girls!

00:37:23This is your rep!

00:37:25This is your friend!

00:37:28You love your rep?

00:37:30It will love you!

00:37:32Let's show your rep a little affection, girls!

00:37:35Chest up! Chest up!

00:37:37Butt out! Butt out! Let's go!

00:37:39Show your rep a little affection!

00:37:42It loves you!

00:37:44You love it!

00:37:47You could be at the sea!

00:37:49100 miles or more!

00:37:51And without your rep...

00:37:53you're shot big!

00:37:58Do you understand?

00:38:00I've seen people eaten by sharks before...

00:38:03because they forgot their rep or their friend.

00:38:08All right!

00:38:10About face!

00:38:14All right! Hit the waves!

00:38:16Hit the waves!

00:38:18Move it! Move it! Move it!

00:38:22Real champagne in a plastic cup.

00:38:24I'm impressed.

00:38:26So you must think I really rate.

00:38:28No. I mean, yes, of course you rate, but...

00:38:31But don't tell me. This is going to eat away my nose, too?

00:38:34No. I mean you.

00:38:36You're the real thing.

00:38:39Look.

00:38:40Can I get a bit personal with you for a moment?

00:38:44You can get very, very personal for as many moments as you want.

00:38:47I just wanted to tell you...

00:38:49that the reason I'm going out with you is because of your...

00:38:52My body. It's cool.

00:38:54Yes, but only partially.

00:38:56Brains?

00:38:58No, not exactly.

00:39:00Your integrity.

00:39:02You're a really solid guy.

00:39:04I really think I can trust you.

00:39:07All right, look, before you give me any more undeserved praise...

00:39:11I don't know how to ask you this.

00:39:14I thought you were never at a loss for words.

00:39:17I was once. Talked my way out of it.

00:39:20Well, let me save you the agony.

00:39:22You want me to play volleyball so you can bet on the game...

00:39:24and scam a lot of money, right?

00:39:26You knew.

00:39:28The expensive champagne was a tip-off, but I was hoping I was wrong.

00:39:31Look, the reason for the champagne has nothing to do with this.

00:39:34I admit it. I need your help badly.

00:39:36My uncle's in a bind, I'm in a bind.

00:39:38And the truth is, yes, I'd love you to play.

00:39:40No way in hell.

00:39:42Okay, look.

00:39:43Uncle Gene can offer you and your teammates...

00:39:45share in a million dollars of prize money.

00:39:48Do I look like Minnesota fats to you?

00:39:50You think I'm some kind of cheap volleyball hustler?

00:39:52Is that what you think I'm about? Money?

00:39:54No.

00:39:55Look, if all I cared about was money...

00:39:57I wouldn't work so hard as an amateur athlete.

00:39:59Harry, I don't take money for my sport.

00:40:01I don't do endorsements, and I don't gamble.

00:40:03And frankly, pal, I'm not the world's biggest fan of those who do.

00:40:07All right, look, I shouldn't open my fat mouth, okay?

00:40:09I mean, I told Uncle Gene this was impossible.

00:40:11You know you're impossible.

00:40:13I thought we had something really special.

00:40:15We do.

00:40:16Yeah? Or is our relationship based on me being an Olympic athlete...

00:40:18and on making your weird Uncle Rich?

00:40:21Okay, first of all, he's my weird Uncle Gene.

00:40:23My weird Uncle Rich bets on plankton races in the East River.

00:40:25It's a whole other story.

00:40:27You know, you're impossible.

00:40:29Shannon, our relationship is based on one thing.

00:40:31Love.

00:40:32Okay, I'm crazy about you.

00:40:33If you don't want to play, I understand.

00:40:35It's not going to change how I feel.

00:40:37You know, Harry, to me, there are more important things in life than money.

00:40:41I agree.

00:40:43It's beliefs like that that make me crazy about you.

00:40:56You know, you deserve to know why I won't play.

00:40:59No, no, it's not important.

00:41:01Yes, it is.

00:41:03Remember that business deal I told you about?

00:41:05Yeah.

00:41:07Well, what I didn't tell you was that, uh...

00:41:10Johnny Staccato got me involved in it.

00:41:13Oh, yeah?

00:41:14Yeah.

00:41:15He's a great guy.

00:41:16He's a great guy.

00:41:17He's a great guy.

00:41:18He's a great guy.

00:41:19He's a great guy.

00:41:20He's a great guy.

00:41:21He's a great guy.

00:41:22He's a great guy.

00:41:23Johnny Staccato got me involved in it.

00:41:25He framed my teammates and me, and we lost our Olympic chances.

00:41:29Well, there's something else we have in common.

00:41:32Our mistrust of Johnny Staccato.

00:41:34Well, I trust Johnny, all right.

00:41:36I trust him to lie, steal, and cheat from anybody who let him.

00:41:41But you know something, Harry?

00:41:44We're not going to let that son of a bitch get away with anything anymore.

00:41:48You're going to play.

00:41:50We're going to play to win.

00:41:52We're the greatest.

00:42:07Wait.

00:42:08Wait, we only have one week to get this miracle together.

00:42:11Let's save it for the victory celebration.

00:42:14Okay?

00:42:15You're absolutely right.

00:42:17I won't touch you.

00:42:18I won't even talk to you.

00:42:20It'll be like we've been married for 30 years.

00:42:22Yeah, right.

00:42:43Okay, come on, girl.

00:42:44Come on, you love that camera.

00:42:46You want that camera.

00:42:47It is your friend.

00:42:48It is your friend.

00:42:49You make love to that camera.

00:42:50Okay, come on.

00:42:51Come on.

00:42:52High energy, high energy.

00:42:53You love that camera.

00:42:54That camera is your friend.

00:42:55You love it.

00:42:56You love it.

00:42:57Kiss it.

00:42:58Kiss it.

00:42:59Come on.

00:43:00Okay.

00:43:01Okay.

00:43:02Sexy.

00:43:03Sexy.

00:43:04I want sexy.

00:43:05I want sexy.

00:43:06I want you to want that camera.

00:43:07Everybody wants you.

00:43:08Okay, legs.

00:43:09Legs.

00:43:10Legs.

00:43:11Higher.

00:43:12Higher.

00:43:13Higher.

00:43:14Okay.

00:43:15Sexy legs.

00:43:16Legs.

00:43:17Oh, I'm so sad.

00:43:18Oh, come here and vision me.

00:43:19Okay, that's what I want you to say to the camera.

00:43:21Okay, you're having fun.

00:43:22You're happy, happy, happy.

00:43:23Happy, happy, happy.

00:43:24Happy.

00:43:25Cut.

00:43:26Okay.

00:43:27Okay, now five minute break.

00:43:28I want you to go make up, get freshened up, and then we're going to do the centerfold.

00:43:31Okay?

00:43:32Okay.

00:43:33You guys, you need to work on this a little.

00:43:35I just need a little bit more energy from you and I'm not kidding.

00:43:39Shannon.

00:43:40Hey.

00:43:41God, it's great to see you.

00:43:42Hi.

00:43:43How you doing?

00:43:45Great.

00:43:47Ashley Millicent, meet my favorite duel master, the leader of our Olympic team, Shannon.

00:43:53Hi.

00:43:54Look at you.

00:43:55You look great.

00:43:56Hey, listen, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine.

00:43:57This is Harry.

00:43:58Hi.

00:43:59How you doing?

00:44:00Pleased to meet you.

00:44:01Enjoying the shoot?

00:44:02More than you can possibly imagine.

00:44:04Listen, I, we have to ask you a favor.

00:44:07I know you're really busy right now, but...

00:44:10But we really need you to play a volleyball game with us.

00:44:13Volleyball?

00:44:14Sure, no problem.

00:44:15My favorite game.

00:44:16When and where?

00:44:18Well, how about Thursday at 11?

00:44:22No, we're talking about a serious game.

00:44:25Like we have to practice every day.

00:44:27We're, uh, we're playing Erica and her Ball Busters.

00:44:31Hey, it'd be a great game.

00:44:33It's as good as we are.

00:44:35Almost.

00:44:36Look, Shannon, I'd love to.

00:44:38It'd be a hell of a lot of fun kicking their butts, but...

00:44:41I just can't afford all that time off.

00:44:43I'm booked solid for the next three months.

00:44:45Look, Johnny Ciccata's bet everything he owns on Erica's team.

00:44:49Damn, I'd love to see that bastard lose.

00:44:52Look, there's a million bucks of prize money for the winning team.

00:44:55You can divide it five ways.

00:44:57Well, isn't that about, what, $200,000?

00:45:00You know what?

00:45:01I bet you can make that in just a few weeks.

00:45:03If you go back to work, please?

00:45:07I'll think it over.

00:45:09I'll think it over.

00:45:10Look, why don't you and your friend come out tomorrow?

00:45:13We're having a charity cow wash on South Beach.

00:45:16Okay.

00:45:18I'm a cancer.

00:45:20Keep smoking and you'll have cancer real soon, bud.

00:45:23Thanks.

00:45:24That's very nice of you to say.

00:45:27Um, you come here often?

00:45:30I work here.

00:45:32Oh.

00:45:33But it's okay.

00:45:35Because you're kind of cute.

00:45:36Hey, baby.

00:45:37How we doing?

00:45:38I told you, don't ever touch me.

00:45:41Fine.

00:45:45Wait, wait, wait.

00:45:47Don't I know you from somewhere?

00:45:51You.

00:45:52You're that guy that comes in and bothers the girls.

00:45:54That's you, isn't it?

00:45:55No, no, no, no, no.

00:45:56I thought I knew you from home.

00:45:57I'm not Dakota.

00:45:58I've never seen you before, though.

00:45:59I don't know my room.

00:46:00I own this club.

00:46:01It's my place.

00:46:02I own this place.

00:46:03Oh, sorry.

00:46:04So you, like, talk to the girls and stuff?

00:46:07They work for me.

00:46:09Cool.

00:46:10You tell I feel them?

00:46:13Get out of my face.

00:46:15Cool.

00:46:18Putts.

00:46:27I think something bad is about to happen.

00:46:30Beach Academy training?

00:46:31No.

00:46:32Call it instinct.

00:46:36I can handle this.

00:46:40I won't go.

00:46:46Come on.

00:46:47Come on.

00:47:02I'm impressed.

00:47:03Oh, thanks a lot.

00:47:18Dom?

00:47:19Sham.

00:47:21How you doing, girl?

00:47:23Hi.

00:47:24Hey, it was very cool how you defended your woman like that.

00:47:28Oh, thanks.

00:47:29Well, she's not really my woman.

00:47:31You two know each other?

00:47:33This is Dominica Nica, the former Sister Mary Holly picture.

00:47:37She's your typical leather-loving, ex-nun, biker-chick dominatrix,

00:47:40fresh out of the convent, heading straight to heaven on a Harley.

00:47:44Oh, another one of those.

00:47:46So what's going on, Sham?

00:47:48Well, I'd like you to meet Harry.

00:47:51How you doing?

00:47:52Hi.

00:47:53Dom, we need your help.

00:47:55Count on it.

00:47:57We're going to play a guitar and some hot new songs.

00:48:01Your guitar?

00:48:03On the Letterman Show, Wayne, Garth, and I get naked and sing

00:48:08It's a Small World After All, backed by Ike Turner,

00:48:11and the combined Vatican and Mormon choir doing the Melanesian Frog

00:48:16Worshiping Fertility Dance.

00:48:19Huh.

00:48:21That sounds like a great gig, Dom,

00:48:23but what we really need is for you to play volleyball with us next Saturday.

00:48:26I'm with Jean and her Ball Busters.

00:48:28Well, it's about time.

00:48:30No letterman can wait.

00:48:32Volleyball? I live for the game.

00:48:35Great.

00:48:37Well, we practice tomorrow morning, 8 a.m. sharp, on the beach.

00:48:40I'll be there.

00:48:42Thanks.

00:48:44See ya.

00:48:47Well, it's nice to know Miami is following New York's lead

00:48:49in letting their psychos directly into the community.

00:48:52I heard that.

00:48:54Sorry.

00:49:25Hey, Jean.

00:49:27Oh, she's frightening me to death.

00:49:29What is it? What are you doing here?

00:49:31What am I doing here?

00:49:33Isn't it obvious here I'm doing a field study, you see?

00:49:36I'm here for the American Sociological Association,

00:49:40and what I'm doing is I'm studying the post-traumatic stress

00:49:45of male sex while watching a nude female dance.

00:49:49That sounds important.

00:49:51Yeah, it is, it is.

00:49:53Yeah, it is, it is.

00:49:55What we call adult education.

00:49:58Yeah, well, I'm sure you should give him a flush.

00:50:03Actually, I'm taking a master's class.

00:50:08Excuse me, sir.

00:50:10Oh!

00:50:11Jean, how are you doing?

00:50:12Yeah.

00:50:13Your usual?

00:50:14Yeah.

00:50:15Having a good time?

00:50:16Thank you, pretty fellas.

00:50:17My pleasure.

00:50:18Your usual?

00:50:19Yes.

00:50:20So that means you come here all the time?

00:50:22Well, archaeologists have to dig, don't they?

00:50:24Zoologists have to observe animals.

00:50:26Right, yes, and from a study like that,

00:50:29you should be getting a Ph.D.

00:50:32This is the best part.

00:50:33Watch this, watch this, watch this.

00:50:35Ha, ha, ha!

00:50:39What's going on here?

00:50:43So anyway, I go into my sister's room.

00:50:45You remember our little sister, Shelly?

00:50:47Uh, her name's Shelly?

00:50:50Shelly, Shelly.

00:50:51Right, fat girl, glasses, teeth missing.

00:50:54Played with dolls.

00:50:55Right, and her nose.

00:50:56She always used to pick her nose.

00:50:57So this was one of those nights,

00:50:58she's picking her nose, she's in the corner.

00:51:00I walk in, we open up the closet door,

00:51:02all this candy starts falling out, right?

00:51:04And I'm like, oh great,

00:51:05I can tell Mom that, like,

00:51:06she's sitting in the corner picking her nose

00:51:08and candy's falling out of her closet.

00:51:10So I go in there,

00:51:12and she's got this whole bucket of rock candy.

00:51:14So I've got 25 cavities,

00:51:15I'm eating all this rock candy.

00:51:17I steal it from Shelly.

00:51:18Shannon!

00:51:20Wait, wait, here's the best part.

00:51:21Here's the best part.

00:51:23Guys, I'd like you to meet Piña Colada.

00:51:25How you doing?

00:51:26Nice to meet you.

00:51:27She was head of the English department

00:51:28at Columbia when I was young.

00:51:29You're drinking a Piña Colada?

00:51:31No, darling, that's my name.

00:51:32Oh, I love your drink.

00:51:34Oh, thank you.

00:51:35So what have you been up to?

00:51:37The tango.

00:51:38Like I had to make ends meet,

00:51:40I just ain't got the guts

00:51:41to carry on with that English teacher gig no more.

00:51:44You know, the money, it ain't so good.

00:51:47Well, we may be able to help out.

00:51:49Great, because Roman Van Der Beest,

00:51:51my last tango partner,

00:51:52just ripped me off, as you know.

00:51:54It takes two.

00:51:55Uh-huh, right.

00:51:57Truth be known, Sean,

00:51:59after the scandal at the Olympics,

00:52:01I just sort of bottomed out,

00:52:02fell completely apart.

00:52:04Oh, not you, Piña.

00:52:05You were always the strongest of all of us.

00:52:07Same old story.

00:52:09Living on the back seat of my bike,

00:52:11selling second-hand anchovies door to door.

00:52:14Hey, it could be worse.

00:52:15I stay in touch with some of the others,

00:52:17and after not going to the Olympics,

00:52:18it just destroyed their entire lives.

00:52:20I mean, we're talking divorce and bankruptcy,

00:52:23massive debt, being alone and sick and friendless.

00:52:27Hey, stop trying to cheer me up.

00:52:29Well, this might cheer you up a little bit.

00:52:31We're supposed to play a volleyball game next week

00:52:33against Johnny Staccato's team,

00:52:35and there's a cool meal you need for the winners.

00:52:38Would I have to give up my anchovy route?

00:52:40Yeah, but, you know, the profit here for you

00:52:42could be like somewhere in the neighborhood of,

00:52:43oh, $200,000.

00:52:46Huh, and all the anchovies I can eat.

00:52:49And you could finally get even with Johnny Staccato.

00:52:53Count me in, beach dudes.

00:52:55Hey!

00:52:57Welcome aboard.

00:52:59About five hours, so are you ready?

00:53:01All right.

00:53:03We've got shirts.

00:53:05Yay!

00:53:07We got it going on now.

00:53:09I love you. I just love you.

00:53:13Oh, I am loving it.

00:53:15All right.

00:53:16100%.

00:53:17This is great.

00:53:18Yeah?

00:53:19All right.

00:53:20We are a love team.

00:53:22Check it out.

00:53:23Love to love you, baby.

00:53:25Well, guys, are we nervous?

00:53:27Yeah.

00:53:28All right.

00:53:30All right.

00:53:33Go, go, go!

00:53:35Come on, come on, come on!

00:53:36Come on, come on, come on!

00:53:38Quick, move it, move it, move it!

00:53:40All right.

00:53:41Baby, let's play.

00:53:45When the chips are down, we come after you.

00:53:48We run you down until you're through.

00:53:51Let's play.

00:53:54Baby, let's play.

00:53:59You can't beat us, don't you see?

00:54:05We're the Beach Academy.

00:54:10One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

00:54:14Move it, move it, move it!

00:54:17This is our time.

00:54:19That's right.

00:54:20Keep out of this place.

00:54:23Hello.

00:54:24You know what time it is?

00:54:25I have a club full of people.

00:54:26You shouldn't be doing this.

00:54:27You should be doing this and this and maybe a little of this.

00:54:30Okay?

00:54:31We got to go.

00:54:32Come on.

00:54:33I don't think so.

00:54:34Hey, folks!

00:54:35Ah!

00:54:36Do we look rude to you or what?

00:54:38Fine!

00:54:43The girls were exhausted by the end of the day.

00:54:46They were starting to get the old magic going.

00:54:49I know we're not supposed to touch each other while we're training,

00:54:52but how would you like to go some place together away from practice

00:54:55and just get to know each other a little bit?

00:54:57I think I'd like that.

00:54:58Great.

00:54:59Perhaps we can sail to my friend's place on Fisher Island.

00:55:02He's gone for the night.

00:55:03We can have the whole place to ourselves.

00:55:05Sounds good.

00:55:06But I have a better idea.

00:55:08Oh, yeah?

00:55:09What's that?

00:55:10Well, I noticed you're a music lover.

00:55:11Oh, yeah.

00:55:12Music's my life.

00:55:13So I would like to invite you to my club.

00:55:17So I would like to invite you, Mr. Harry Spencer,

00:55:20to a very special concert tonight.

00:55:22Great.

00:55:23Shall we say my place at night?

00:55:25We shall.

00:55:48♪

00:56:04Hey.

00:56:05Hi.

00:56:07This is a nice place.

00:56:08Wealthy family?

00:56:09Yeah, my dad's Brent McSorley, the famous circus clown.

00:56:12The guy in all the used car ads?

00:56:14Yeah, that's him.

00:56:16Well, you look incredible.

00:56:18I'll be the envy of every guy at the concert.

00:56:20Well, I hope so, Harry,

00:56:22because you're the only guy I invited.

00:56:25I don't understand.

00:56:26I know.

00:56:27And that's one of the things I like about you.

00:56:29It's that constant, bewildered look.

00:56:33The concert's here?

00:56:34Bingo.

00:56:36And it isn't exactly rock and roll.

00:56:39Come on.

00:56:47Guys.

00:56:50I know I should have told you, but I just couldn't resist.

00:56:54Does that, uh, make me a bad girl?

00:56:57Yes, it makes you a very bad girl.

00:56:59Well, are you gonna make me face the music?

00:57:03If it's orchestrated that way.

00:57:05What do you say we, um, fiddle around?

00:57:09Okay.

00:57:11Okay.

00:57:16Okay.

00:57:47You know, we should put a diving board in that room, huh?

00:57:51Telephone man?

00:57:53No, don't answer it.

00:57:54I have to.

00:57:56Hello?

00:57:59Yes, I said I would, and I will.

00:58:02Goodbye.

00:58:07Bye-bye.

00:58:09Bye-bye.

00:58:11Bye-bye.

00:58:19What's wrong? Who was that?

00:58:21That was nobody.

00:58:31You know, I'm really starting to dig classical music.

00:58:34Just classical music?

00:58:37Nope.

00:58:44We should wait till tomorrow after the game.

00:58:48Yeah, you're right.

00:58:53I guess I should get going.

00:58:56Good night.

00:58:58Good night.

00:59:01Bye.

00:59:11What are you doing in my house?

00:59:14This is my room.

00:59:16It's not your room.

00:59:18It's not my room.

00:59:20It's not your room.

00:59:22It's not your room.

00:59:24It's not my room.

00:59:26It's not your room.

00:59:29It's not my house.

00:59:31I told you not to come here.

00:59:33Hey, babe, I gotta keep tabs on my investment.

00:59:36Is that what I am to you, Johnny?

00:59:38An investment?

00:59:40Oh, I didn't know you really cared, honey.

00:59:43Hey, you are whatever, whenever, and wherever I want you to be.

00:59:51Get it?

00:59:53Get it?

00:59:57Hello?

01:00:00Hey, it's Harry.

01:00:02Look, I know the best way to lose someone is to try to rush things,

01:00:06but I just wanted to say that I'm pretty sure I'm falling in love with you.

01:00:11I can't wait till this game's over. We can spend a lot more time together.

01:00:14Harry.

01:00:16No.

01:00:17No? You don't want to spend more time together?

01:00:19Harry, I can't talk to you right now. This is really...

01:00:21I said give it to me.

01:00:23Who is that? Shan, are you okay?

01:00:25I'm sick as well as being dumb.

01:00:27Johnny, no, please.

01:00:29John, what the hell is Johnny Staccato doing in your house?

01:00:32Yeah, yeah, I love you too, sweetheart.

01:00:35Yeah, she's okay.

01:00:37She's really, really okay.

01:00:42She's the hottest thing.

01:00:43Johnny, please.

01:00:45Hey, did you hear that? She begged.

01:00:47I just love it when she begs. It heats me up.

01:00:52Johnny, what the hell are you doing there?

01:00:54I just dropped by for a little refreshing shower and to check on my woman.

01:00:58She's in heat for real, man.

01:01:01All right, you listen to me, you son of a bitch.

01:01:03If you hurt her, I'll kill you.

01:01:05You put her back on the phone now.

01:01:07Oh, my gosh, what's he gonna do?

01:01:10That's some of that karate stuff.

01:01:13Put her back on the phone now!

01:01:15Listen, that whipsucker.

01:01:18Stop it. Harry.

01:01:20Has he hurt you? Did he hurt you?

01:01:22No, and I didn't mean to hurt you.

01:01:27What are you saying?

01:01:33Listen, when I beat you in volleyball

01:01:37and Pig Iron dragged your ass up and down my beach academy,

01:01:41I'm gonna take Shannon here back to New York.

01:01:45Or shall it be Barcelona, darling, this time, huh?

01:01:53Ciao, sweetheart.

01:01:55Shannon.

01:01:57Shannon!

01:02:23All right, we're here, okay?

01:02:25Let's do what we did in practice. We're gonna be fine, right?

01:02:28All right, ladies and gentlemen, here we sit.

01:02:31We got a wonderful game about to commence.

01:02:34We have, of course, the wonderful, great, dynamic, fabulous, superb...

01:02:40We're gonna be coming really strong up front.

01:02:42You gotta stay together. You gotta hang tough.

01:02:44Team, what's up?

01:02:46Okay, gonna win it first. Everybody applaud.

01:02:49Give it up for that beach academy. What's up?

01:02:52Okay.

01:02:54Okay, girls, let's kick their butts.

01:02:56All right, yeah!

01:03:03We have, like, the really horrible team with big breasts.

01:03:06We've given them that.

01:03:08But aside from that, they have no talent. Let's give it up for their breasts.

01:03:11You?

01:03:13Kick their butts.

01:03:16Kick their butts.

01:03:22And you, don't get any ideas.

01:03:28Okay, okay, all right, don't worry about her.

01:03:30Don't worry about Shannon. Let's just focus on the game.

01:03:32Dom, you gotta be tough up front, all right?

01:03:35All right.

01:03:37You gotta block. Solitaire, remember? Block.

01:03:41All right, let's just play some volleyball, all right?

01:03:52Come on, beach academy!

01:03:55Come on, ladies!

01:03:57Come on, beach academy!

01:04:11Look at that spike. God, that was nasty.

01:04:14That's what it's called, right, honey, a spike?

01:04:16Yeah!

01:04:28Come on, Ginger!

01:04:32Okay.

01:04:34Oh!

01:04:37I'm sorry, I had gas. What do you want from me?

01:04:40Eight burritos for what? I'm sorry.

01:04:58Touchdown!

01:05:00Oh, yeah!

01:05:02It was a touchdown.

01:05:04Football!

01:05:16That's it, that's it, Peter, that's it.

01:05:18Smash it!

01:05:20That was a good shot, yeah.

01:05:27Oh!

01:05:29Oh!

01:05:36Stay put.

01:05:50Harry, I need to talk to you.

01:05:52When we first met, I didn't just happen to be walking down the beach

01:05:55when Erica hit that ball out of the game.

01:05:57It was all a set-up to get your uncle to forfeit the academy.

01:06:00Yeah, after last night, that part was pretty easy to figure out.

01:06:07Oh, it's Mr. Alligator Breath.

01:06:16See, now that's what I expect to see.

01:06:18What did we get, 25 points there?

01:06:20Okay, the score now is 357 to 95.

01:06:23No. No?

01:06:25Uh, 32.

01:06:2732 to 64.

01:06:2942 to 33.

01:06:31Watch the game.

01:06:33What escapes me is why you went along with it.

01:06:35Was it because of your great love for Johnny?

01:06:38Love had nothing to do with it.

01:06:40I hate that pathetic excuse for a man. Trust me.

01:06:43You really expect trust at this point?

01:06:45Harry, listen.

01:06:47I told you that Johnny set up that Olympics scam.

01:06:49But what I didn't tell you is that my brother is in jail at Railsford

01:06:52and he's gonna be there for the next 10 years if Johnny gives false evidence.

01:06:58Which he's prepared to do, of course,

01:07:00if you don't go along with his little volleyball scam.

01:07:02That's right.

01:07:09Another 50K, moronski.

01:07:12You got it.

01:07:16That's it. That's it. That's it.

01:07:19Oh, I love it. I love it.

01:07:22What about you two romantically?

01:07:24I mean, did you really have a relationship with him?

01:07:26Well, if you can call one day a relationship,

01:07:29especially one that ended with me swimming back home from the yacht.

01:07:35Yeah, no, no. Over the net. Not under the net. Over the net.

01:07:38That's very good. No, they're wonderful. They really are.

01:07:40They're the best team I've ever seen.

01:07:50No, straight down.

01:08:05Very nice. No, no, that wasn't good.

01:08:08No, that wasn't on our side, was it?

01:08:10Sorry, that wasn't on our side. We won't take that point.

01:08:14Get out of there. All right, all right.

01:08:17I can feel it. We're gonna make a big turnaround now.

01:08:19It's a big chance. All we need is one field goal,

01:08:22and we're there, man.

01:08:24I knew that. I knew that.

01:08:26All we need is one thing over the thing.

01:08:29Harry, screw the fish. I'm not gonna let you down.

01:08:37Okay, let's play some ball.

01:08:44That's it, Solitaire. Yes!

01:08:47Okay, here we go, Harry.

01:08:52That's what I like to see! Way to go!

01:08:55That's what I like to see! Way to go!

01:09:26You gotta help each other out! Come on!

01:09:44You guys are looking great, York, but you gotta get the ball.

01:09:46You gotta get it to Darla, the captain. She's our power.

01:09:56Help! Help!

01:10:01They kidnapped John.

01:10:03What? What?

01:10:08All right, bro, you're the coach now.

01:10:10No, no, no, no. You're the coach.

01:10:12We're way ahead. Just don't let Gene down, okay?

01:10:14Coach!

01:10:16Yeah!

01:10:26Take the mic. Wish me luck.

01:10:29I mean it. I need luck.

01:10:31A lot of luck. I can be a man.

01:10:33Okay.

01:10:35All right, Harley.

01:10:49Attention, ladies.

01:10:51There's a new coach in town, so don't fret.

01:10:56Here's the new plan. We're gonna do everything differently.

01:10:59From now on, I want a lot of field goals and touchdowns,

01:11:02and you're gonna put holes in one.

01:11:04You're gonna put holes in one, and what's that thing you do

01:11:07when you go over the net?

01:11:09Slam dunk.

01:11:11Slam dunk!

01:11:13Slam dunk!

01:11:25Slam dunk!

01:11:41All right, now listen.

01:11:43Hey, pay attention when I'm talking to you.

01:11:45Hey! Is nobody paying attention to me here?

01:11:47How am I supposed to coach if you won't pay attention?

01:11:50You're supposed to catch the ball.

01:11:52Catch the ball when it comes to you.

01:11:54Girls!

01:12:04All right, all right, guys, look at me.

01:12:06No, don't look at me. I mean look at the ball.

01:12:08You gotta look at the ball.

01:12:14Listen, get in there.

01:12:16Feel the ball. Become part of the ball.

01:12:18I want you to be all over the ball.

01:12:22Just follow it all the way with your eyes.

01:12:31You can't miss if you have a big bat in your hand.

01:12:37She loves me. She loves me not.

01:12:40So you see, Shannon is pure as a lamb.

01:12:44You know that Olympic scam?

01:12:46Well, I done it and blame it on her brother.

01:12:49That way she, pretty little dame,

01:12:52would do anything I tell her.

01:12:55And now you're gonna lose,

01:12:57and I get all of the Beach Academy

01:13:00and a piece of dessert.

01:13:05Oh, there you go.

01:13:07See, that way it's not in your way

01:13:09when you're trying to catch it.

01:13:20Pretend that ball is really bothering you.

01:13:22Just get it out of the way.

01:13:40Oh, I can't believe this. You guys suck.

01:13:42You don't listen to me at all.

01:13:44I told you to make a field goal.

01:13:47You're so weak. You're so weak.

01:13:49You're so weak. You're so weak.

01:13:51You're so weak. You're so weak.

01:14:00Hey, you guys don't get away.

01:14:02It's in the game.

01:14:04Play some volleyball!

01:14:17Yeah!

01:14:34That's it.

01:14:47Yeah!

01:15:08What happened?

01:15:10We won!

01:15:12We're going to collect the money!

01:15:18Uncle Gene, there's one thing I don't say often enough.

01:15:21I think you're really great.

01:15:23Harry, there's one thing I don't say often enough.

01:15:26No, Gene, there's nothing you don't say often enough.

01:15:48I guess we all learned a lot from this, huh?

01:15:50I'll tell you what I learned,

01:15:52and that is always do the right thing.

01:15:54Yeah.

01:15:56Well, unless your conscience tells you to do otherwise.

01:15:59I think those are words to live by.

01:16:02Listen, Poofy, you know that boat of yours, you know?

01:16:05I mean, it's all right when you're a bachelor,

01:16:08but not if you two kids, you know...

01:16:10Why don't you take Johnny's boat, huh?

01:16:12That's why you're my favorite uncle.

01:16:15You know, I just wish there was something we could do for my brother.

01:16:18Oh, I think there is.

01:16:20What?

01:16:22Back on the yacht, I secretly taped Johnny's admission of guilt.

01:16:25That means that Johnny is not only going to the poor house...

01:16:29He's going to the big house, baby!

01:16:31Without a front foot!

01:16:37Uncle Gene, we'll talk to you later, okay?

01:16:39Yeah, all right, yeah.

01:16:41Good, good.

01:16:43Good, good.

01:16:45Have fun and watch the grass stains.

01:17:04I made all my own money.

01:17:06Johnny said it'd be cool to lose.

01:17:08Don't worry about it, Pig Iron.

01:17:10I'll get you a little job at the academy.

01:17:12Boat!

01:17:20Oh, fuck!

01:17:22Oh, I just cleaned these clothes!

01:17:26Honey?

01:17:27Yes?

01:17:28This is to one great vacation.

01:17:30I'm glad I came out here.

01:17:32And of course, save the day

01:17:34and help Beach Academy remain what it is.

01:17:37Now a little treat for you and me.

01:17:43Here you go.

01:18:12You're welcome.

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