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Kashif Mag
  • 5/5/2025
THINK PORN NO BIG DEAL WATCH THIS
BY
KASHIF MAG
Transcript
00:00Have you been called out for a sexual behavior and instead of owning up to it, you justify it,
00:06rationalize it, minimize it, try to make it go away? Well, those are defense mechanisms
00:12that you learned a very long time ago to try to feel safe in a time of uncertainty.
00:18I'm Dr. Trish Lee. I help men come out of the screen in unwanted sexual behaviors
00:23to reclaim their lives. Today, I want to talk about those defense mechanisms that you default to
00:31in those times of stress and what you can do instead. So let's dive in. So if you're caught
00:36watching porn or masturbating or you're caught with porn on your computer at work or your partner
00:42addresses you for checking out women or anything like that, that creates a spike of stress activation
00:50in your brain. I can see that stress activation on the QEEG brain map brain scan that I provide
00:56as the first step when I work with people. So it is measurable. It's seeable. It's visible.
01:03This stress spike is what makes you default into those defense mechanisms. And we know from a long
01:10history of psychological studies that these defense mechanisms are designed when you're young to help
01:16you feel safe. But unfortunately, what was adaptive or helpful back then carries through into adulthood
01:23and it becomes what's called maladaptive. It's not serving you anymore. So this is how it works.
01:29If you're caught up in sex addiction or porn addiction, and you have to go back to the screen
01:34for those dopamine hits that your brain is dependent on, then if somebody catches you or they try to talk
01:41to you about it, even though they love you and they want to help you, you feel attacked. And you have learned
01:48this is the time to go into defense mode. So here's what I want to share with you. Maybe you're not being
01:55attacked. Maybe you only feel like you're being attacked because you know you're caught up in an unwanted
02:01behavior that served you in the past adaptive, but is no longer serving you in the present or the future
02:07maladaptive. So what to do about it? First, I want you to recognize that if you're caught in screen
02:14addiction, especially explicit matter, we know from neuroscience studies that it is neurological
02:20dysregulation, brain dysfunction at the core of screen addiction. So I always tell people it's not your
02:27fault because if you found screens and you found explicit matter when you were young, your brain got
02:32hooked on it. It was hijacked by the high levels of dopamine in explicit matter. So it's not your fault,
02:39but it most certainly is your responsibility to take care of now. And not just for the people in your
02:45life, for you. You're missing out on your full potential because if you're walking around with
02:51brain dysfunction in your head, guess what you're not walking around with? That optimal brain pattern
02:57that's necessary for flow state and for optimal full potential performance. So if you're not feeling
03:04like you want to in your life, and if you're not performing like you want to in your life, and that's
03:09in mental health, physical health, like productivity, focus, concentration, and erectile function, if these
03:17things are not in line with what you're looking for in your life, I want you to know brain dysfunction is
03:22at the core. But here's the beautiful thing. With advances in neuroscience and technology,
03:28you can heal that brain dysfunction from the inside out, all naturally, holistically. If you want to
03:35know more about it, please visit my website at drtrishlee.com, where you can download your
03:41pleasure pathway reset e-guide. It's a guide that I've put together to help you understand that your brain
03:47has been linked to the screen for high levels of dopamine for seeming pleasure from the screen.
03:53But unfortunately, it's keeping you from joy in your life. If you're up for it, get my book right
03:58behind me, the only copy that exists right now, Mind Over Explicit Matter. It's slated to be the gold
04:04standard in explicit matter recovery. So go to Amazon or wherever you buy books and pre-order your copy.
04:11It's coming out March 18th, 2025. Okay, so those are two resources that you can get started with
04:17right away to understand that your brain has been hijacked by the pleasure. I always call it the
04:23seeming pleasure of dopamine from the screen. But we want to rewire and reset these pathways back into
04:29your life. So what does that necessitate? First of all, that stress activation that I can see in the
04:35QEEG brain map that happens in your brain that will lead you to default to those defense mechanisms,
04:41we can stop that from happening. When your brain is optimized, you're no longer stressed in the way
04:48that you're stressed now. It's what I call strained brain from screen addictions. And we can heal that
04:53we can bring that back to the optimal state. Then it's imperative that you learn to take new actions
05:00and to have new thoughts. Now this is very difficult unless we regulate your brain, but it goes like
05:06this. If your partner says, honey, I want to talk to you, that likely spikes your stress and it makes
05:13you go, I wasn't doing anything. I'm just a man. I have needs. Our sex life isn't good enough.
05:19Defensive mechanisms that you've been defaulting to, to stay away from that vulnerable conversation and
05:25communication that would lead to healthy connection. So you know where I'm going with this. Instead of
05:31using that defense mechanism, it's imperative that you learn how to respond in a new way. Again,
05:37it might be difficult with the current brain dysfunction, but try this. Instead of defaulting
05:43to the defense mechanism, instead use either a neutral or a positive comment that you've planned
05:49ahead of time in that moment. So your partner says, honey, I want to talk to you. And you say,
05:54okay, let's talk. That's neutral. Or you say, great. I would love to have the opportunity to
06:00connect with you. That's positive. You will notice that you didn't say, I didn't do anything. What do
06:05you need to talk about? You're always riding me. You're my judge and jury. You didn't go there.
06:10All negative. Stay neutral. If you can't be positive, positive is ideal. So now your partner says,
06:17babe, have you been checking women out? Or it makes me uncomfortable when you check people out,
06:23when we're out eating at restaurants. And instead of saying, what do you want me to do? Put blinders
06:28on? Instead of saying that, you say, I can understand that. I will try to honor you in a
06:35healthier way. Or you can say, I'm hearing you. That's neutral. I am hearing you. When you say,
06:40I can respect that, that's positive. Learn how to act in a new way when you're in these moments
06:47that you use your defense mechanisms. Okay. I hope this brain hack strategy helps you out. And if
06:52you're looking for more help on the journey, please go over to drtrishlee.com. My team and
06:56I specialize in helping people come out of the screen and get back on purpose in life and your
07:02work, your hobbies, and your relationship. I'll see you over at drtrishlee.com. And as always,
07:07control your brain or it'll control you.

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