AMAZING AND FUNNY MOVIE! Ideal for the whole family! ｜ Full Movies in English ｜ 4K Ultra
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00:02:59Mom?
00:03:01What is this? My birthday?
00:03:06Where is everybody?
00:03:29How did you say that?
00:03:39Ratio, breakfast coming right up.
00:03:43How are we this glorious morning?
00:03:45Doing great!
00:03:46Good to hear that.
00:03:49What did you say?
00:03:50I said we're great!
00:03:51I love you, sis!
00:03:54You do?
00:03:56What is going on?
00:03:58What do you want from me?
00:03:59We just really appreciate everything you do around here.
00:04:01And rarely say thanks, so thanks.
00:04:03And from now on, we are going to be the big happy family you always wanted.
00:04:06Did you get the breakfast I made you, honey?
00:04:08Yeah, Mom, it was great.
00:04:10But, um, why is everybody so happy?
00:04:13I thought we were on the verge of losing the ranch and all its properties to the banks.
00:04:17Not anymore.
00:04:18We've just won the lottery!
00:04:20One billion dollars.
00:04:22We're rich, Jules.
00:04:23And now we get to keep the ranch, pay off all the debts, bring in more horses, and live happily ever after.
00:04:31And it's all because of you!
00:04:33Wait, you mean I picked the winning numbers?
00:04:36Yes, you did.
00:04:37We're so proud of you, honey.
00:04:40This, this is like a dream come true.
00:04:44That's because it is.
00:04:47A dream come true?
00:04:48No, just a dream.
00:04:49Your dream proves size.
00:04:51My dream, but I don't get it.
00:04:55I don't get it.
00:05:04Got you again, sucka.
00:05:05I fell for the oldest trick in the book.
00:05:08Get out of my room!
00:05:10What are you, like seven?
00:05:12Try putting a teen at the end of that.
00:05:14Yeah, and we'll always be older than you.
00:05:16Stronger, too.
00:05:17And prettier.
00:05:18Well, if you're so big and strong, why don't you help me with the chores once in a while?
00:05:24What's the point?
00:05:25We're gonna be out of here in like a week.
00:05:26Mom hasn't sold the place yet.
00:05:28She's signing it away today.
00:05:30Mr. Beard will be here this afternoon.
00:05:32Yeah, don't call mom, mom.
00:05:33She's our mom, not yours.
00:05:34Yeah, you're just like an illegal adopted alien or something.
00:05:38The term is stepdaughter.
00:05:40I think that only works when your father is married to our mother.
00:05:44When after he died, the term becomes human parasite.
00:05:47Sounds about right, doesn't it?
00:05:48Pretty accurate to me.
00:05:49This was my dad's ranch before you ever moved in.
00:05:52I grew up here.
00:05:53This is my home.
00:05:54So you're the intruders.
00:05:56Not for long.
00:05:59Just get out before I...
00:06:00Phone with the mouth.
00:06:01Oh, too late.
00:06:08I wish this was a dream.
00:06:38Hey, good morning, Juliet.
00:06:45Take whatever you'd like.
00:06:47I didn't have time to cook.
00:06:49As usual.
00:06:51And it's Jules, remember?
00:06:53Juliet is a much prettier name.
00:06:56Only if you have the Romeo to go with it.
00:06:58Yeah.
00:07:00It'll happen someday.
00:07:02You'll see.
00:07:03Well, at least I still have Horatia.
00:07:06Your dad was my Romeo.
00:07:09And boy, could I use him now.
00:07:13How bad is it?
00:07:15On a scale from one to ten, I would need triple digits.
00:07:20This is my...
00:07:23Our home.
00:07:24You can't sew.
00:07:26I'll try my best.
00:07:28Mr. Beadle is coming today to review our options.
00:07:31But you're not signing anything, right?
00:07:33I love this place, Juliet.
00:07:36Sorry.
00:07:37Jules.
00:07:38I don't want to move back to the city.
00:07:40I mean, whatever we can do.
00:07:42But you can't.
00:07:43Well, what happened to Horatio?
00:07:45Look.
00:07:46Your dad made a wonderful life here for us.
00:07:49And for Horatio.
00:07:50So we're gonna do whatever we can.
00:07:52Win the lottery?
00:07:53I tried that.
00:07:56There is a very happy family celebrating in Ohio today.
00:08:01It's all over the news.
00:08:03I mean, what we really need now is a miracle.
00:08:08Miracles are possible if you put your mind to it.
00:08:11Okay.
00:08:12Whatever you say.
00:08:14Why don't you go check with your brothers?
00:08:16Brainstorm with them.
00:08:17See if they can think of something.
00:08:19They could think that would be a miracle.
00:08:22What was that?
00:08:23Will do.
00:08:24I'm sure they're full of wonderful ideas.
00:08:43Okay.
00:08:44Now watch this and respond truthfully.
00:08:46It's very important.
00:08:47I got it.
00:08:48I got it.
00:08:49Get on with it.
00:08:56Well, what do you think?
00:08:58I think I like the second one best.
00:09:00Okay.
00:09:01I have more.
00:09:05What are you doing?
00:09:06Craig's practicing his poses.
00:09:08Yeah.
00:09:09When we move back to the city, I have to be ready.
00:09:11My career awaits.
00:09:12Is what a mime?
00:09:14Male model.
00:09:15You don't think I have what it takes.
00:09:18Well, look at this.
00:09:24Wait.
00:09:25Yeah, yeah.
00:09:26Laugh it up.
00:09:27When we become rich and famous, we'll see who's laughing last.
00:09:29Oh, you're going to be a model too?
00:09:31No.
00:09:32I'm the businessman.
00:09:33Pete's going to be my manager.
00:09:34Yeah, I'll be handling all the deals because I'm great with money.
00:09:37Okay.
00:09:38Prove it.
00:09:39Do you have two tens for a five?
00:09:40Absolutely.
00:09:49Thanks.
00:09:50Uh, Pete, I don't think that works out quite.
00:09:52Wait, what was that?
00:09:53Two tens for a five?
00:09:54What, do you think I'm an idiot?
00:09:56Okay.
00:09:57Here's back your five, not giving back two tens.
00:10:01That's better.
00:10:02Now get out of here and do your chores.
00:10:07Try to pull a fast one on me.
00:10:10See why I'm handling all your business?
00:10:12So you don't make those kind of mistakes.
00:10:15What, you think that's funny?
00:10:17Here's two tens.
00:10:18Give me a five, quick.
00:10:25She did it to me.
00:10:28And you did it to me too.
00:10:47I wish it were that easy with Mr. Peetle.
00:11:15Hey, Horatio.
00:11:18How's your leg holding up?
00:11:20Still sore, huh?
00:11:22Well, don't worry.
00:11:24When it gets better, we could go out riding.
00:11:26Just like the good old times.
00:11:28Sound good, Phillip?
00:11:35Horatio, what are we gonna do?
00:11:37I can't leave this place and I could never lose you.
00:11:40We've grown up together.
00:11:45You're a pony.
00:11:47It was my eighth birthday, remember?
00:11:49I got a new mom, two new brothers, and you the same year.
00:11:54Pete and Craig weren't that bad back then.
00:11:58Not until Dad died.
00:12:01I miss him so much.
00:12:04And Kim means well, but she can't run this place on her own.
00:12:08And Pete and Craig are no help whatsoever.
00:12:10You know, what we need to do is come up with a plan, Horatio.
00:12:15A way to make a lot of money really fast.
00:12:19Any suggestions?
00:12:22You don't say.
00:12:25Well, when I can learn how to speak horse, we'll continue this conversation, okay?
00:12:32Well, maybe it won't be that bad.
00:12:34Perhaps Mr. Beetle will buy the place, fix it up, and let us stay here to run it.
00:12:40It's a possibility, right?
00:12:47Much and energy, and good night.
00:12:53Have a good night!
00:13:58Now, Wesley, when we get there, I want you to sit back and not say a word.
00:14:15I want your father to work his magic, and one day soon, this ranch will be one of the biggest
00:14:18malls in the county.
00:14:20Another mall.
00:14:21Great.
00:14:21It is great.
00:14:23You know how much money American malls make?
00:14:25No.
00:14:26That's why you're here, Suck.
00:14:27To learn.
00:14:29Maybe you're running my empire two decades from now.
00:14:31And you know what it takes from the ground up.
00:14:55I don't know.
00:15:03I don't know.
00:15:04When do you look out there, what do you see?
00:15:27Trees, flowing streams, vistas straight out of postcards.
00:15:32I see waste.
00:15:33Nothing but waste.
00:15:35All this unused land, taking them space from buildings, factories, and apartment stores.
00:15:41It's enough to make you sick.
00:15:43It's unnatural.
00:15:45It's nature, Dad. It's as natural as it gets.
00:15:48Ah, nature's overrated.
00:15:50If people liked nature so much, they'd live in it.
00:15:53You see people living in those trees?
00:15:55I don't think so.
00:15:56Animals live there, Dad.
00:15:58Ah, that's right.
00:15:59But if animals ran the world, it would be complete chaos, disorganization.
00:16:04The whole financial system would collapse.
00:16:07People wouldn't pay attention to politicians.
00:16:09We wouldn't have a need for lawyers.
00:16:11And then, then what would we do?
00:16:13Celebrate?
00:16:15No joke like that, Wes.
00:16:17Not even just.
00:16:19It's a sign of weakness.
00:16:21I don't think the signs up here make any sense.
00:16:25That's both to me.
00:16:27Deer crossing.
00:16:29And why do I care about that?
00:16:31Because it's a deer crossing!
00:16:33No!
00:17:31What's up, guys?
00:17:35You think you're really funny, don't you?
00:17:38No.
00:17:38I think I'm moderately funny from time to time.
00:17:41I want my money back.
00:17:42I gave you your money back.
00:17:44Not enough of it.
00:17:46Okay, fine.
00:17:47What if I say you could win it back?
00:17:49How?
00:17:50Just pick a number between 1 and 10.
00:17:53If I don't guess it right, I'll give you back double your bet.
00:17:56Okay.
00:17:57$20.
00:17:58Okay.
00:18:00Pick a number.
00:18:01Okay, I guess.
00:18:14Okay.
00:18:15Is the number between 1 and 3?
00:18:17No.
00:18:18Between 5 and 7?
00:18:19Nope.
00:18:20Between 8 and 10?
00:18:21Yeah.
00:18:22The number's 9.
00:18:23Better luck next time.
00:18:32Wait, not so fast.
00:18:34Now you picking up between 1 through 10.
00:18:36Fine.
00:18:37Number 5.
00:18:38Are you kidding me?
00:18:45You're going to let her get away with that?
00:18:47Come back here, Jules.
00:18:47Come back here, Jules.
00:18:48Come back here, Jules.
00:18:49Come back here, Jules.
00:18:50Come back here, Jules.
00:18:50Come back here, Jules.
00:18:51Come back here, Jules.
00:18:51Come back here, Jules.
00:18:52Come back here, Jules.
00:18:52Come back here, Jules.
00:18:53Come back here, Jules.
00:18:53Come back here, Jules.
00:18:54Come back here, Jules.
00:18:54Come back here, Jules.
00:18:54Come back here, Jules.
00:18:55Come back here, Jules.
00:18:55Come back here, Jules.
00:18:56Come back here, Jules.
00:18:57Come back here, Jules.
00:18:57Come back here, Jules.
00:18:58Come back here, Jules.
00:18:58Come back here, Jules.
00:18:59Come back here, Jules.
00:19:00Don't get me away, okay?
00:19:30She's got to be around here somewhere.
00:19:39You're so not going to be my agent.
00:19:41Fine.
00:19:42I wouldn't make any money with you anyways.
00:19:43Your poses are stupid.
00:19:46You're stupid?
00:19:47Okay, smart guy.
00:19:48What's 412 times 97 divided by 7?
00:19:53I don't know.
00:19:55You see?
00:19:56You don't know.
00:19:57Okay, so what is it?
00:19:59Oh, no.
00:20:00I was asking you.
00:20:01You don't know the answer either, do you?
00:20:02I'm trying to change the subject.
00:20:04I made my point.
00:20:05No, you didn't.
00:20:06You would have to know the answer if you got...
00:20:07152.
00:20:09You're just making up numbers now, aren't you?
00:20:11I am not.
00:20:12R2.
00:20:24That was a close one.
00:20:26I know.
00:20:27I know.
00:20:28I know.
00:20:29It was a dumb move.
00:20:30Someday, someone will lock some sense into me.
00:20:33But, until then, I come out on top.
00:20:37Oh!
00:20:38Oh!
00:20:39Oh!
00:20:40Oh!
00:20:42Oh!
00:20:44Mr. Beetle, what happened?
00:21:14What happened to your car?
00:21:15Oh, you won't believe it.
00:21:17We were passing one of those yellow signs, the one with the deer on it.
00:21:20A deer crossing sign?
00:21:21Yeah.
00:21:22And suddenly out of nowhere, a deer runs right in front of the car.
00:21:25Oh my gosh, are you both okay?
00:21:27Yeah, we're okay. Deer's okay. We swerved and hit a tree.
00:21:31But you tell me, why would they put a deer crossing sign right in the middle of the road?
00:21:35Wouldn't it be smarter to put it in a safer location where there's no people or passing cars?
00:21:40I don't understand what you mean.
00:21:43Well, those signs, they're a hazard to everyone's health.
00:21:45I mean, it's letting the deer know that it's okay to cross there.
00:21:48You know, someone should write a letter to the local authorities and that would fix the problem.
00:21:52Dad, the signs are there for the motorist to warn them about the deer.
00:21:57Oh, that's absurd. How do we expect the deer not to cross the road when we're just given it permission to do so?
00:22:02But if that's the case, we should set up a separate set of signs for the deer.
00:22:07Maybe one with a speeding car on it so they know when they can cross.
00:22:10I'll say this is why I don't deal in the countryside. There's nothing like dumb deer here.
00:22:14Is he serious? Can I get you something to drink, Mr. Beetle? Something to calm your nerves?
00:22:27Oh, a gin and tonic would be lovely. Thanks, Ms. Bev.
00:22:31Kim, please.
00:22:33Kim? That's short for Kimberly, isn't it?
00:22:36Yes, it is.
00:22:38It's a lovely name.
00:22:40My first ex-wife's name was Bev.
00:22:42Short for Beverly.
00:22:43No, short for beverage. Her parents were real heavy drinkers.
00:22:50That was a joke, no?
00:22:52Father never jokes. It's a sign of weakness.
00:22:55The boy's right.
00:22:57Okay, let's get down to the contracts here.
00:22:59The boy has a name, by the way. I'm Wesley. Short for nothing.
00:23:04Nice to meet you, Wesley.
00:23:05I'm sorry. I thought I made it...
00:23:07Well, let's not get bogged down with details.
00:23:09Kimberly, you're in real financial trouble here.
00:23:12The bank is going to foreclose on the property by the end of the week,
00:23:15selling off the land acre by acre.
00:23:17Now, I see tremendous potential here,
00:23:19and I'm willing to buy your entire ranch
00:23:21and even help you with your move back to normal civilization.
00:23:24As we look over the contracts, you see that my offer is more than generous.
00:23:35It's lovely.
00:23:50I can see that you've really put a lot of time and effort into this.
00:23:55Well, we'd have to remove some trees and some bushes and some wildlife,
00:23:59but this place has real potential.
00:24:01It's all about vision.
00:24:02That's how you get ahead, son.
00:24:04You see something on your path, and you mow it down.
00:24:06Like the deer.
00:24:07You know, this is a lot to go into.
00:24:11Why don't I give you guys a tour of the property,
00:24:15and then you can see, you know, how we operate here.
00:24:18My father's allergic to fresh air.
00:24:20Oh, no, no, be silly.
00:24:21That was a one-time thing.
00:24:23And the doctor said it was more about the pollen in the air than the air itself.
00:24:26We'd be delighted to get the two of the land, Kimberly.
00:24:33I think about where I'm going to put that ten-story parking garage.
00:24:36Okay, well, let me grab my allergy pills, sinus medication, eye drops,
00:24:41and sinus relief medication, and I'll be all set.
00:24:44Where's your bathroom?
00:24:45Yeah, it's right over there.
00:24:47Okay, thanks.
00:24:50Your father has a lot of health issues, huh?
00:24:53Well, like mental issues.
00:24:55You see, taking care of business, he's a pro.
00:24:58Taking care of himself is a whole nother matter.
00:25:01He was better when Mom was around, but after she left,
00:25:04he's been a bit obsessed with work.
00:25:08I have a daughter about your age who's very much like that.
00:25:12Not with work, specifically,
00:25:14but she can have a one-track mind when it comes to her obsession.
00:25:19What is it?
00:25:20Oh, it's not an it. It's a who.
00:25:22And it goes by the name of Horatio.
00:25:34Juliette? Juliette? Are you okay, Juliette?
00:25:38Juliette, speak to me.
00:25:40I'm fine. I'm...
00:25:46Juliette? Juliette? Are you okay, Juliette?
00:25:50Juliette, speak to me!
00:25:52Juliet, Juliet, are you okay, Juliet?
00:26:03Juliet, speak to me.
00:26:05I'm fine.
00:26:08Ow.
00:26:10Who hit me?
00:26:12The lucky horseshoe above my stable fell and knocked you out.
00:26:16Lucky by whose definition?
00:26:18I don't know.
00:26:19Your father hung it up there, and he's always just said that it was lucky.
00:26:24Remember?
00:26:25Yeah, I do.
00:26:26I'm surprised you remember.
00:26:27You were just a pony.
00:26:29What is it?
00:26:30You're talking.
00:26:31So, what's wrong with that?
00:26:34When did you start talking?
00:26:35I've always talked to you.
00:26:38Every morning when you feed me and say hi, I say,
00:26:41Hello, Juliet, and how are you today?
00:26:43And then after I eat, I thank you.
00:26:47Yeah, but I never understood you before.
00:26:48Oh, really?
00:26:50Well, I always had the impression you understood me quite well.
00:26:53This isn't possible.
00:26:55You mean I've been speaking all this time and you haven't understood a word?
00:26:59Boy, do I feel like an idiot.
00:27:02Okay, this is not happening.
00:27:04I'm dreaming.
00:27:05Or I'm hallucinating.
00:27:07I was hit on the head with this, and now I'm hearing voices.
00:27:11What kind of voices?
00:27:13Horse voices.
00:27:14Do they sound like me?
00:27:15Yeah, they sound exactly like...
00:27:17Oh, I need medical attention.
00:27:19I hope you feel better soon.
00:27:21Oh, and I think my leg is improving, by the way.
00:27:24Oh, and I think my leg is improving.
00:27:28Do we have time for you?
00:27:29What kind of anthony?
00:27:30Ooh.
00:27:31There you are.
00:27:34There you are.
00:27:36You have to worry about a wedding.
00:27:37Yeah, I think my leg is over.
00:27:38We are at the wedding where you're at,
00:27:38and I think his husband's love.
00:27:39Oh, and I do exactly want them.
00:27:40No one that happens to us.
00:27:40Oh, and I don't have to worry about it.
00:27:41I don't have to worry about it.
00:27:42Well, but I do not.
00:27:43Okay, my leg is over.
00:27:44Oh, and I don't pay attention.
00:27:45You can have to worry about it.
00:27:46I saw my heart.
00:27:47Well, and I rah.
00:27:48So I have to worry about it.
00:27:49And we lay down the wall.
00:29:49My stepdaughter.
00:29:52I've tried my best to keep it going, but it's really my late husband who had the green thumb.
00:30:00Green thumb?
00:30:01Was it infected?
00:30:03Is that what killed him?
00:30:04Again, not a joke?
00:30:07No.
00:30:09I'm sorry, Kimberly. Nature's not really my forte. There's just so many things alive here. Like this tree. It's alive, isn't it?
00:30:16Yep. It just grows right out of the ground.
00:30:22And you don't find that disturbing? Dad doesn't trust anything that isn't man-made.
00:30:28What about water?
00:30:30Don't drink it. It rusts pipes and fish go to the bathroom in it.
00:30:34W.C. Fields, right?
00:30:37That's an intelligent man.
00:30:38He was a comedian, Dad.
00:30:40I don't think he was.
00:30:44Where is Juliet now?
00:30:46Juliet, this is Mr. Beadle and his son Wesley.
00:30:50Hello.
00:30:50Wes is fine. My father doesn't shake hands.
00:30:54How are you?
00:30:56I'm fine. I'm good.
00:30:58Why, what have you heard? There's nothing wrong with me.
00:31:01Mr. Beadle is interested in developing the property, so I was just showing them around.
00:31:06How's Horatio doing?
00:31:07His leg isn't proving.
00:31:09Not that he told me that or anything. I just noticed when I was checking him out.
00:31:12Who is Horatio?
00:31:14He's Juliet's favorite horse.
00:31:16They're best friends, grow up together, talk to each other.
00:31:20No, we don't.
00:31:21I mean, we're not that close. A horse is a horse.
00:31:25Of course, of course.
00:31:27And no one can talk to a horse.
00:31:28Of course.
00:31:29That is, of course, unless the horse...
00:31:32I'm sorry, you just reminded me of an old television show.
00:31:36Well, I wanted to bring them over to the stables.
00:31:39No, no, no, no, no.
00:31:40I mean, no, you don't want to go in there.
00:31:44Stables are a mess, there's hay everywhere, and it smells like horse poop.
00:31:48Oh, well, then I'll pass.
00:31:49That doesn't sound like a real good environment for my sinuses.
00:31:52Maybe you could bring Horatio up to the corral,
00:31:54because I'd really like to show Mr. Beadle the advantages to running a successful operation
00:32:00as opposed to a new shopping mall.
00:32:06Horatio's not quite himself today.
00:32:09I thought you said he was feeling better.
00:32:13I'd love to meet him. Horses are awesome.
00:32:16You really think so?
00:32:18Yeah.
00:32:20Okay, I'll go get him.
00:32:22Can I come?
00:32:25Oh, no, I'll do it.
00:32:27Horatio gets a little nervous around people he doesn't know.
00:32:29Since when did you start to love horses?
00:32:37Since I left the city and discovered the wonders of nature.
00:32:45Get away from me, you flying spawn.
00:32:48It's a bee, Mr. Beadle.
00:32:50See that thing, it flew right after you tried to kill me.
00:33:25Horatio, I'm taking you to the corral, and you are not to speak to me because you are a horse and I'm a human. You got that?
00:33:33Absolutely.
00:33:35Good. No, not good. I didn't hear that.
00:33:39I said absolutely.
00:33:41No, you didn't.
00:33:42Oh, did I mispronounce it? I was just telling you I got what you were saying.
00:33:47Yeah, but you shouldn't. You shouldn't get what I'm saying.
00:33:50Then speak French.
00:33:52Why?
00:33:52Because I don't understand French.
00:33:55It's official. I'm losing my mind.
00:33:58Why? Because you're having a conversation with a talking horse?
00:34:01Uh, yeah.
00:34:02Well, I think it's a good thing. I like being able to communicate.
00:34:06Yeah, well, not when we're on the verge of losing the ranch.
00:34:09What are you saying?
00:34:11Now you don't understand.
00:34:12I mean, what do you mean by that?
00:34:15There's this really rich guy who wants to buy the ranch and turn it into a shopping center.
00:34:20So, unless we can convince him that this place is worth keeping it the way it is, we're done for.
00:34:26Aha! A brilliant idea.
00:34:29Yes?
00:34:30Well, that's what we need. A brilliant idea.
00:34:33Yeah, no kidding.
00:34:35This ranch hasn't made money in almost a year.
00:34:38No one runs out the cabin, so how can we prove that this place can be profitable again?
00:34:42Would you like me to speak with him?
00:34:44You think he's going to talk to a talking horse?
00:34:47No. What we need is something special.
00:34:50Something like...
00:34:52A talking horse.
00:34:56I got it.
00:34:57Well, how about a talking pig?
00:34:58I remember you telling me about that movie years ago with that talking pig,
00:35:02and there was the other one about the spider web and the pig.
00:35:05Humans seem to love pigs.
00:35:06No, just forget about the pig idea.
00:35:08You're a talking horse.
00:35:10Yeah, I thought we already established that.
00:35:13Yeah, well, you're the one who's going to save this ranch.
00:35:15How?
00:35:16My leg is still pretty sore.
00:35:18I don't think I'll be able to win any jumping competitions for a while.
00:35:22You don't have to compete.
00:35:24You are one of a kind.
00:35:25You're a talking horse.
00:35:27You're a talking horse.
00:35:57Stop that.
00:36:07I'm going to be a male model, not you.
00:36:09You can do it.
00:36:10I can do it better.
00:36:11Oh, yeah?
00:36:12Try this on for size.
00:36:19Are you guys playing charades?
00:36:22Who are you?
00:36:23Yeah, these are our woods.
00:36:26Oh, you must be Pete and Craig.
00:36:28My name is Wes.
00:36:29My father's thinking of buying your property.
00:36:31So you're like the really, really rich kid, huh?
00:36:34Yeah, I've got a money tree growing in my backyard, but I think I like yours better.
00:36:39So do you have, like, money on you?
00:36:41I've got a few bills.
00:36:43Why?
00:36:44You a gambler man, Wes?
00:36:45On occasion.
00:36:47But I bet you $20.
00:36:48If you pick a number from 1 through 10, I can guess it.
00:36:53Okay.
00:36:54You got one?
00:36:55Yes.
00:36:59Number seven.
00:37:00Number six.
00:37:01Nice try, but you were close.
00:37:03I can't believe you.
00:37:05Why doesn't it work when I do it?
00:37:06Thanks, guys.
00:37:09Is the corral this way?
00:37:10Wait a minute.
00:37:11Give him a chance to win back that money.
00:37:12Yeah, give me a chance unless you want a serious beating.
00:37:15Okay.
00:37:15Tell you what.
00:37:17I'll bet you $50 that you guys aren't here.
00:37:20You're going to bet us that we're not here.
00:37:22And I'll prove it.
00:37:24Deal.
00:37:25You're not in Mexico, right?
00:37:28No.
00:37:29And you're not in Detroit.
00:37:30No way.
00:37:31And you're not in England.
00:37:33Right.
00:37:33So if you're not in Mexico, you're not in Detroit, and you're not in England, you must be someplace else.
00:37:40That's right.
00:37:41We must be someplace else.
00:37:42And if you're someplace else, you certainly can't be here.
00:37:45Naturally, if we're someplace else, we can't possibly be here.
00:38:03You see, we were trying to create a family attraction
00:38:27where children and adults could commune with nature.
00:38:32That doesn't sound very healthy.
00:38:34Oh, no, it is.
00:38:35It's very relaxing.
00:38:37You see, people build up a lot of stress in their day-to-day daily grind.
00:38:41And they keep it right here.
00:38:43Ow!
00:38:44What did you just do, woman?
00:38:46It was the biggest knot I've ever felt.
00:38:48You've got to have that looked at by somebody.
00:38:50I see all the top doctors in the city.
00:38:52Well, a doctor can't do anything for that.
00:38:54You need to have a good body massage by someone who knows what she's doing.
00:38:58Are you qualified to give that kind of diagnosis?
00:39:00Yes.
00:39:01I was a masseuse for 20 years.
00:39:04That's how I met my husband.
00:39:05He said I had magic fingers.
00:39:06Speaking of magical, I'd like you all to meet Horatio.
00:39:13A very magical horse.
00:39:20He's a beauty.
00:39:22Yes, yes, that's very nice.
00:39:23But let's go back to the house and discuss the contract, shall we?
00:39:25Oh, no.
00:39:26Mr. Beetle, come closer.
00:39:27I really want you to see this.
00:39:29You're not afraid of a little horse, are you?
00:39:31You call that creature little?
00:39:33Little?
00:39:37Yours, money.
00:39:39Boys, boys, behave.
00:39:41We have guests.
00:39:43Okay, Jules, what did you want to show us?
00:39:45Did you teach Horatio a new trick?
00:39:47She's wonderful with animals.
00:39:49Have I ever.
00:39:50Horatio, why don't you say hi to this nice gentleman and introduce yourself?
00:39:59Hello.
00:40:00It's a pleasure to meet you.
00:40:02My name is Horatio.
00:40:04I'm a horse, if you haven't already guessed by my appearance.
00:40:08I enjoy long walks in the woods.
00:40:10Hay is my favorite food.
00:40:12And I was considering taking up tap dancing, but unfortunately, I have two left feet.
00:40:18Hey, that was pretty good.
00:40:21Pretty good?
00:40:22Are you kidding me?
00:40:24I mean, maybe it wasn't the best joke in the world, but it was told by a talking horse.
00:40:28A talking horse?
00:40:29Are you crazy?
00:40:30Did you not all hear Horatio just speak?
00:40:35Yes.
00:40:36And?
00:40:38Yes, we did not just all hear Horatio speak.
00:40:41He just kind of grunted and snorted like he always does.
00:40:44But he looks great, Jules.
00:40:45You've done a wonderful job with him.
00:40:47You didn't hear me there?
00:40:48Say something else.
00:40:58Something else?
00:40:59No, tell another joke.
00:41:01So this horse walks into a bar, and then the bartender asks the horse,
00:41:05Why the long face?
00:41:06Get it?
00:41:10You get it?
00:41:11Long face?
00:41:12Horse?
00:41:13Horses have long faces?
00:41:15It's like a pun.
00:41:17I don't think they got it.
00:41:19You want me to try another one?
00:41:20Hey, how long are a horse's legs?
00:41:23Long enough to touch the ground.
00:41:26Jules, you want to take him back to the stable?
00:41:29Wow.
00:41:30This is a tough crowd.
00:41:31I don't believe this.
00:41:33He's talking, guys.
00:41:34He's telling stand-up jokes.
00:41:36What if I sit down and tell him?
00:41:38Would that make a difference?
00:41:40Mr. Beatle, let's go look at another part of the farm.
00:41:42If you insist.
00:41:46We didn't even have to make a fool out of you this time.
00:41:49You did it all by yourself.
00:41:54Don't be upset.
00:41:56I'm losing my mind.
00:41:59No, you're not.
00:42:00They're just too stupid to hear me.
00:42:03Well, that's easy for you to say.
00:42:04I'm sorry. I was just trying to help.
00:42:06Oh, no. I wasn't talking to you.
00:42:08She was talking to me.
00:42:09Yeah, well, he doesn't know that.
00:42:11You're talking to the horse, aren't you?
00:42:13See? He got it.
00:42:15That's right.
00:42:17And you can hear the horse talking back to you?
00:42:19Should I answer that one?
00:42:21No.
00:42:22So you can't hear the horse?
00:42:24Yes, she can.
00:42:25No, I can't.
00:42:28Who are you talking to?
00:42:29You.
00:42:29I'm talking to you.
00:42:31And I am only talking to you from now on.
00:42:34Okay.
00:42:35Do you want me to help you bring Heratio back to the stables?
00:42:38Sure.
00:42:39So what?
00:42:41Now you're giving me the silent treatment?
00:42:43What did I do?
00:42:44What is it?
00:42:45Nothing.
00:42:46I didn't hear anything.
00:42:47And I didn't say anything.
00:42:49Can I say something?
00:42:51Didn't hear that yet.
00:42:52I didn't hear anything.
00:42:53I didn't hear anything.
00:42:54I didn't hear anything.
00:42:55I didn't hear anything.
00:42:56I didn't hear anything.
00:42:57I didn't hear anything.
00:42:58I didn't hear anything.
00:42:59I didn't hear anything.
00:43:00I didn't hear anything.
00:43:01I didn't hear anything.
00:43:02I didn't hear anything.
00:43:03I didn't hear anything.
00:43:04I didn't hear anything.
00:43:05I didn't hear anything.
00:43:06I didn't hear anything.
00:43:07I didn't hear anything.
00:43:08I didn't hear anything.
00:43:09I didn't hear anything.
00:43:10I didn't hear anything.
00:43:11I didn't hear anything.
00:43:12I didn't hear anything.
00:43:13I didn't hear anything.
00:43:14I didn't hear anything.
00:43:15I didn't hear anything.
00:43:16I didn't hear anything.
00:43:17I didn't hear anything.
00:43:18I didn't hear anything.
00:45:51That's nice.
00:45:52Very, very nice.
00:45:54Is your daughter seeing a doctor?
00:45:56Because I know a team of a wonderful therapist in the city.
00:45:58Mr. Beatle, Juliette is a great girl.
00:46:02It was really hard for her losing her father.
00:46:05And now the thought of losing this place?
00:46:07I mean, you can imagine the stress she's under.
00:46:10She loves it here.
00:46:11We all do.
00:46:12I'm beginning to get the impression that you don't want to sell me this land.
00:46:16Miss Bell, if I'm wasting my time...
00:46:17I never said that.
00:46:19Just let me show you the inside of the cabin.
00:46:21I'm just going to check it out first.
00:46:23Craig, Pete, can you entertain Mr. Beatle for a few minutes?
00:46:26I'll be right back.
00:46:27You know, we don't all love it here.
00:46:35No.
00:46:35We want to move back to the city and become famous models.
00:46:38Yeah, don't worry.
00:46:39Mom will sell.
00:46:40She'll definitely sell.
00:46:42Well, it's good to know because I want to pay a lot of money for it.
00:46:46We like money.
00:46:47Yeah, big fans of money.
00:46:49You seem like smart boys.
00:46:51And I wish you could teach my son the same appreciation.
00:46:54He has this absurd notion that money can be used to make the world a better place.
00:46:59Protect the environment, help the poor.
00:47:02I don't know where he gets those ideas from.
00:47:04Probably his mother.
00:47:05But she won't see me throwing my money away like that.
00:47:08Mr. Beatle, do you have two tens for a five?
00:47:12Well, I do indeed.
00:47:16Here is ten for you and ten for you.
00:47:20Okay, you can come in now.
00:47:22Charming boys you have here.
00:47:24Charming boys you have here.
00:47:46Now, I know you can still hear me.
00:47:50Look, I'll get new material.
00:47:52My next performance will have them rolling in the aisles.
00:47:55I promise.
00:47:56I really do love it up here.
00:47:57We don't have anything like this in the city.
00:48:00I don't know why you guys want to turn this place into a shopping mall.
00:48:03We don't.
00:48:04Then why are you selling this place to my father?
00:48:08We can't afford to keep it.
00:48:10But, you know, we don't want anyone to tear it down.
00:48:13I think we could build this ranch up into a real resort.
00:48:17A lot of animals and more horses.
00:48:20That would be cool.
00:48:21Wouldn't it?
00:48:23Wouldn't what?
00:48:25Wouldn't that be cool?
00:48:26Oh, I think so.
00:48:28But good luck convincing my father.
00:48:30He hates anything that has to do with the outdoors.
00:48:32It's like he's got some kind of phobia for all things organic.
00:48:36That doesn't sound natural.
00:48:38Will you quit it?
00:48:39You're not funny.
00:48:40I wasn't trying to be funny.
00:48:42I know.
00:48:43I'm sorry.
00:48:45I could be funny.
00:48:46Want to hear a joke?
00:48:47I'm all ears.
00:48:50I didn't do anything yet.
00:48:52I know.
00:48:52Well, I was just imagining how funny your punchline would be once you finish telling.
00:49:00Continue.
00:49:02Why couldn't the pony sing?
00:49:04Because his voice was a little hoarse.
00:49:07I haven't reached the punchline yet.
00:49:10I'm sorry.
00:49:10I already know that one.
00:49:12Oh.
00:49:13Okay.
00:49:14How about this one?
00:49:16A cowboy rode off down the road on Wednesday and came back three days later on Wednesday.
00:49:21How's this possible?
00:49:22His horse was named Wednesday.
00:49:26Oh, come on.
00:49:27You know that one, too?
00:49:28And Wednesday had two little pony cousins named Monday and Tuesday.
00:49:32Between the three of them, it was a short week.
00:49:36I give up.
00:49:38No, Wes.
00:49:39I'm sorry.
00:49:39I wasn't laughing at you.
00:49:40I know.
00:49:41That's the problem.
00:49:43Will you let him finish his jokes and quit interrupting?
00:49:46I thought we were a good team.
00:49:48It's all about timing, you know.
00:49:49Just shut your trap before you ruin everything.
00:49:51You can hear your A-show, can't you?
00:49:54That wasn't an act.
00:49:56Nope.
00:49:57Nope.
00:49:57That would be crazy.
00:49:59And then they would put me in a sane asylum for being crazy.
00:50:03Humans cannot hear animals speaking to them.
00:50:05Well, what about Dr. Doolittle?
00:50:07He was a fictional character in a children's book.
00:50:09He just spoke to you again, didn't he?
00:50:13Yes.
00:50:14But only I can hear him.
00:50:20They're going to lock me up and throw away the key.
00:50:22Hey, if they do that, I'll bail you out.
00:50:25Get it?
00:50:26Hay.
00:50:27Bail.
00:50:29Bail of hay.
00:50:30Bail you out.
00:50:31No, no, no.
00:50:32Don't cry.
00:50:34It'll be alright.
00:50:36His jokes are so bad.
00:50:38It's painful.
00:50:40Sorry, I'm afraid you're saddled with me.
00:50:42I'm afraid you're saddled with me.
00:51:12So, as you can see, it's a perfect place for a vacation.
00:51:36It's a great area to raise a family as well.
00:51:40Yeah, it's very homely.
00:51:42Homely?
00:51:44Homely.
00:51:45I meant homely.
00:51:46It feels like home.
00:51:47Well, that's because it is one.
00:51:49It's our home.
00:51:51Once you sign these documents, it's going to be a great place for thousands of shoppers,
00:51:54too.
00:51:55Have you seen anything I've shown you, Mr. Baitle?
00:52:00Of course, Kimberly.
00:52:01My eyes have been wide open.
00:52:03Except when that buzzing flying creature was trying to kill me.
00:52:06Yeah, I don't think they were.
00:52:11And you can call me Mrs. Bell.
00:52:15Is there a problem?
00:52:16In a syllable?
00:52:17Yes.
00:52:20We don't want to leave our home.
00:52:24Ms. Bell, the bank's going to take it away from you.
00:52:27And there's the problem.
00:52:29And all I'm trying to do is help.
00:52:31No.
00:52:33All you're trying to do is help yourself by building another useless mall and make millions
00:52:39of dollars while destroying everything that's right in the world.
00:52:43And what my ass brought that on?
00:52:50You know, you may be a whiz at business and making money, but you don't have a clue about
00:52:59people's feelings.
00:53:00Your son was right.
00:53:03My son?
00:53:05And what did he tell you?
00:53:08About the same thing that you.
00:53:10You're so busy, so wrapped up in your work that you don't even know how to take care
00:53:16of yourself, let alone what's best for the planet.
00:53:20My son's future is all laid out for her, Ms. Bell.
00:53:23And he will never go hungry.
00:53:25And I can't say the same for your kids if you don't sign these documents, which, by the
00:53:28way, is no longer on the table.
00:53:31Yeah, I know.
00:53:32It's on the floor.
00:53:33And as for my health, I have the best doctors in the world.
00:53:37I have the best help.
00:53:37I have the best of everything.
00:53:39And there is nothing, I repeat, nothing that's wrong with me.
00:53:43Oh!
00:53:44Oh!
00:53:45What is it?
00:53:46My back!
00:53:47Oh!
00:53:49Oh!
00:53:50My back, it's...
00:53:51I got a bad back, it's locked up.
00:53:53Here, grab my back pills, they're in the briefcase.
00:53:55Oh!
00:53:57Oh!
00:53:57Oh!
00:53:59Oh, yeah.
00:54:00Oh, my God, these?
00:54:02They're useless.
00:54:03They just mask the pain.
00:54:05They don't do anything to solve the problem.
00:54:07Here, let me help you to the couch.
00:54:12Oh, my gosh.
00:54:13Oh!
00:54:14Your back is totally out of whack.
00:54:17I can help you with this.
00:54:19I need Dr. Hurt.
00:54:21Who?
00:54:22My back doctor.
00:54:23Your back doctor is named Dr. Hurt?
00:54:26What's your dentist?
00:54:28Dr. Decay?
00:54:29Oh, Miss Bell, I don't appreciate your sense of humor.
00:54:32A man of my position...
00:54:33Yeah, which is almost horizontal.
00:54:36That may be.
00:54:37That doesn't mean I have to put up with your flippant attitude towards my current situation.
00:54:40You know, I think it's going to enjoy this.
00:54:45Hang on.
00:54:46It's going to hurt a little.
00:54:47Whoa.
00:54:47Gah!
00:54:48What?
00:54:49Oh, my God.
00:54:51Oh, my God.
00:54:52Oh, my God.
00:55:11What?
00:55:11Oh, my God.
00:57:43I don't think you're crazy.
00:57:52I'm sure there's a perfectly rational explanation for why you can suddenly communicate with
00:57:56a horse.
00:57:57So, tell me how it began.
00:57:59Okay, well, I was hiding from Pete and Craig because I kind of tricked them out of some
00:58:07money earlier, but that is only because they torture me every single morning of my life.
00:58:12Like, one morning, they moved my alarm clock just out of reach and then tied my foot to the
00:58:19bedpost, so when I got up to turn it off...
00:58:23I don't know.
00:58:29I'm sorry.
00:58:31I'm sorry.
00:58:34I'm sorry.
00:58:35Haha, ha ha ha ha ha ha!
00:59:00Ha ha ha ha ha whatever backup.
00:59:05And most recently, they poured shaving cream in my hand while I was sleeping, tickled my nose, and I hit myself, and...
00:59:14You never told me about that one.
00:59:16Happened this morning.
00:59:19And I really don't feel too bad about taking their money.
00:59:22So, skipping ahead, you say you were hiding from your brothers, and...
00:59:25And I was in Horatio's stable, and they didn't find me, and they finally left.
00:59:30I got out, closed the door, and...
00:59:32And the horseshoe fell and knocked her out cold.
00:59:35Exactly.
00:59:36I think I missed a section there.
00:59:38Right. You can't hear him.
00:59:40Stop chiming in, Horatio.
00:59:43So, this horseshoe is above Horatio's stable, so...
00:59:48When I closed the door, it fell, clunked me in the head, and when I woke up, I could hear Horatio speaking to me.
00:59:55Okay, so...
00:59:57Maybe we're dealing with a magical explanation rather than a rational one, but...
01:00:01At least we have the cause.
01:00:03It is supposed to be a lucky horseshoe.
01:00:06That's true.
01:00:09Wait.
01:00:10Maybe that's it.
01:00:12Since I'm the only one who got hit in the head, maybe I'm the only one who could hear Horatio speaking.
01:00:17I guess that's one theory.
01:00:19Well, we can test it.
01:00:20How?
01:00:21Hit him with the horseshoe and see what happens.
01:00:24It's not a bad idea.
01:00:26What's not a bad idea?
01:00:28Horatio suggested that if I hit you with the horseshoe, maybe you'll be able to hear him too.
01:00:32That's a horrible idea.
01:00:34Why?
01:00:35It sounds like it involves pain.
01:00:36No, we don't have to hit you that hard.
01:00:39How about a little tap on the head?
01:00:41Really?
01:00:41Okay, but be gentle.
01:00:48Ow!
01:00:49Can you hear me?
01:00:51Did he say anything?
01:00:52What we've got here is a failure to communicate.
01:00:57Let me try again.
01:00:58Hit him again.
01:00:59Ow!
01:01:00Can you hear me now?
01:01:02Anything?
01:01:02I hear slight ringing.
01:01:04Sounds like we're on the right track.
01:01:06Hit him again.
01:01:07Harder!
01:01:07Ow!
01:01:08How about now?
01:01:10Can you hear him now?
01:01:11I can't hear anything now.
01:01:13Once more.
01:01:18Oh, God.
01:01:20Wes?
01:01:21Wes, speak to me.
01:01:23I knocked him out.
01:01:24Well, that's what happened to you.
01:01:26When he wakes up, hopefully he'll be able to understand me.
01:01:29Yes, if he wakes up.
01:01:31I don't believe this.
01:01:33The first guy I actually like.
01:01:35And I kill him.
01:01:36Okay, Wes, wake up.
01:01:41Hi.
01:01:44Up and at him.
01:01:47Time to wake up.
01:01:48Let's go.
01:01:53Hello, Wes.
01:01:55Nice day, isn't it?
01:01:57Yes, Mr. Tree.
01:01:58It's very nice.
01:01:59I see you're branching out all over.
01:02:06Hey, watch where you're stepping, buddy.
01:02:08Sorry, blades of grass.
01:02:09I didn't see you growing there.
01:02:18Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
01:02:20Hey, I heard that.
01:02:21You want to know what I heard?
01:02:23Juliet is looking for you, and she has something to say.
01:02:26Horatio said you have something to tell me.
01:02:40What is it?
01:02:43Yuck!
01:02:46That did the trick.
01:02:47I think I might have hit you a little too hard.
01:02:50I'm sorry.
01:02:51You think?
01:02:52Because I don't even believe my brain's functioning anymore.
01:02:55Just drop the horseshoe, okay?
01:02:57And not on my head this time.
01:02:59I'm sorry.
01:03:00It was a dumb move.
01:03:01I should have never listened to a talking horse.
01:03:04Are you okay?
01:03:07I feel like I have a hangover, and I don't even drink.
01:03:11Well, you know what they say.
01:03:12You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him wink.
01:03:16It's drink, not wink.
01:03:19Oh, right.
01:03:20That makes sense.
01:03:21Why would you bring a horse to water to make him wink?
01:03:24That's just silly.
01:03:25Besides, I wink all the time.
01:03:27Well, I drink too, so I don't know what the point is actually of saying all that.
01:03:31It's a metaphor.
01:03:32It means that everyone's supposed to take control of their own lives.
01:03:35You can't force a person to do something they don't want to do.
01:03:38Which is probably why hitting someone in the head with a horseshoe
01:03:41isn't going to suddenly make them believe in something like...
01:03:43Being able to hear a talking horse?
01:03:46Exactly.
01:03:48Wes, who are you having this conversation with?
01:03:52I was just responding to Horish, you know.
01:03:55Why are you staring at me like that?
01:03:57He's... he's talking.
01:04:00Oh, not again.
01:04:05Woohoo, woohoo.
01:04:22Oh my gosh, I feel so good!
01:04:51What did you do?
01:04:53Just a little alignment to get you back on track, so to speak.
01:04:58This is amazing.
01:05:00I haven't felt this good since Bev.
01:05:03What?
01:05:06Well, my wife used to give me back massages when we were together.
01:05:10And I do miss that.
01:05:14Yeah, well, a man can miss a lot of things when he doesn't take a moment to stop and look around.
01:05:21Drink up.
01:05:23What is this?
01:05:25It's good for you. Drink it.
01:05:27Well, I'm allergic to a lot of things. I'm not supposed to have a lot of sugar or starch.
01:05:30Dairy's out of the question. It's pretty much just fruits, so...
01:05:33Don't be such a baby and drink this stuff.
01:05:38If your doctors told you that living was bad for your health, that you would seriously consider trying not to do it.
01:05:46I can feel my nasal passages starting to open up.
01:05:49Yeah, it's my own special herbal brand. It's much better than that stuff you get on the shelves.
01:05:56I can breathe. I can actually breathe.
01:05:59Yeah. And breathing is good for you. I'm sure your doctors would not even disagree with that.
01:06:05You know, I used to own a home in the countryside. Had a lot of good times there.
01:06:11Well, Wes was barely three when we moved to the city, so he might not remember much of it.
01:06:16That's a shame. Why did you leave?
01:06:20Well, get closer to work. And then when Bev left me, I just had too many memories there, so we sold the place.
01:06:30Yeah. I guess it was time.
01:06:35Yeah, well, that's what I'm good at, right? Buying and selling. Not so much on the long-term investment. Ask my ex-wife's.
01:06:44Yeah, that was Ryan's speciality. Building and developing. But he was also good at nurturing the kids.
01:06:52You're good at that too, Miss Bell.
01:06:55Kim.
01:06:57Monty.
01:07:00By the way, do you have any more of this wonderful tea?
01:07:03Yeah. I do.
01:07:06And...
01:07:08I'll take another look at those contracts, too.
01:07:12Okay.
01:07:14Continue on your way, Spawn.
01:07:17Continue on your way, Spawn.
01:07:44Wesley?
01:07:58Wes?
01:08:01Now what are we going to do?
01:08:02I didn't do anything to him.
01:08:04He's just horsing around.
01:08:06No, he's passed out.
01:08:09Well, get the pail.
01:08:10Splash him.
01:08:12It's empty.
01:08:14I don't want to drown the poor guy.
01:08:15So he just fell asleep?
01:08:18Pretty much.
01:08:19Then why don't you try what they do in all those stories?
01:08:22What stories?
01:08:24You know, the ones you used to read to me when we were growing up.
01:08:27About the prince and the princess.
01:08:29Which one?
01:08:30I don't know. It doesn't matter.
01:08:32They all end up the same way.
01:08:34The princess kisses the prince and he wakes up.
01:08:37No, the prince is always the one to kiss the princess.
01:08:40Not the other way around.
01:08:41And then she wakes up.
01:08:42It's never the other way around?
01:08:45No.
01:08:46Not unless the prince is a frog or some other type of animal.
01:08:49Then he turns into a prince.
01:08:51Is that why you were always kissing me when we were younger?
01:08:55It's worth a try.
01:08:56Well then, isn't it worth a shot?
01:09:00Come on.
01:09:01Be the first.
01:09:01Start a fashion.
01:09:03Your first kiss.
01:09:05I'm so proud.
01:09:07I wish I had a camera.
01:09:09Don't watch me.
01:09:10Juliet.
01:09:11Juliet.
01:09:12Juliet.
01:09:13Juliet.
01:09:14Is that all you can say?
01:09:30Wherefore art thou, Juliet?
01:09:34Sitting next to a pile of manure, if you must know.
01:09:37I had the strangest dream.
01:09:39That you were talking with Horatio?
01:09:41Yeah.
01:09:42But then I had another dream where I thought I woke up and...
01:09:45I was still talking to you?
01:09:50How you doing, Romeo?
01:09:53Is this like a dream within a dream within a nightmare?
01:09:57Depends.
01:09:58Did you think I kissed you in the dream or the nightmare?
01:10:01You kissed me?
01:10:02For real?
01:10:03Cool.
01:10:04So, that means this is...
01:10:08Really happening?
01:10:10A horse is talking to me.
01:10:12A horse is actually speaking.
01:10:14To me.
01:10:15He can speak to me too.
01:10:16Jules, when the world finds out about this...
01:10:18Yeah, that's kind of the hard part.
01:10:20Remember?
01:10:21Oh yeah.
01:10:22We can't exactly go around bashing people on the head with that thing.
01:10:25Some might get upset.
01:10:26And who knows how much luck is left in that horseshoe.
01:10:29There may be a limited supply.
01:10:31We have to find my dad.
01:10:32Yeah, and convince my mom not to sell.
01:10:35Not when there are miracles happening here.
01:10:37You're right.
01:10:39This discovery is a lot more important than another dumb shopping mall.
01:10:42Bring the horseshoe.
01:10:43Maybe if we both explain it to them.
01:10:46We'll be back.
01:10:48Not so fast.
01:10:50Nobody's leaving here until we settle a certain amount of debt.
01:10:52Yeah, you won some money from us earlier.
01:10:54And we want a rematch with a game you can't possibly cheat at.
01:10:58Cards.
01:10:59Really?
01:11:00You don't think people cheat at cards?
01:11:01Not the way we play.
01:11:02No.
01:11:03That's it.
01:11:03No.
01:11:04No.
01:11:07No.
01:11:14No.
01:11:19No.
01:11:19No.
01:11:20No.
01:11:21No.
01:11:21No.
01:11:22I don't know.
01:11:52You've done a really beautiful job here, Kim.
01:11:54Did you decorate yourself?
01:11:57Mostly. Interior design has always been a hobby of mine.
01:12:01I'd say it's more than a hobby.
01:12:03Magical fingers, incredible tea, great taste.
01:12:07Could be the perfect woman.
01:12:09You cook?
01:12:11Okay, so nobody's perfect.
01:12:14But I do make a mean lasagna.
01:12:19You know, you were right about this.
01:12:21This is an amazing deal.
01:12:23I would be crazy not to take it.
01:12:26Plus, it'll be a big help next year when the boys go to college with their tuition.
01:12:30Well, feel free to have your lawyers look it over.
01:12:32Oh, they already have.
01:12:34Yeah, I emailed them the advance copy you sent me.
01:12:38And they basically said I would be a fool not to take the deal.
01:12:42Oh.
01:12:43So?
01:12:44Well, I think I have proven to you that I am not a fool.
01:12:47No, no.
01:12:48You definitely are not.
01:12:49Okay, so I guess there is just one more question, Monty.
01:12:51Yes?
01:12:52Do you have a pen?
01:12:53Thanks.
01:12:54Thanks.
01:12:55Thanks.
01:12:56Thanks.
01:12:57Thanks.
01:12:58Thanks.
01:12:59Thanks.
01:13:00Thanks.
01:13:01Thanks.
01:13:02Thanks.
01:13:09Thanks.
01:13:10Thanks.
01:13:11Thanks.
01:13:21Thanks.
01:13:28Thanks.
01:13:30But you don't understand.
01:13:49We have to stop Mom from selling the land.
01:13:52There are magical properties in this horseshoe.
01:13:56She's right, and if we can figure out a way to capitalize on it, we can save your ranch.
01:13:59No, you don't understand.
01:14:01We don't want to save the ranch.
01:14:03Pete and I are going to move back to the city and become world-famous posers.
01:14:07Yeah, you guys are posers, all right.
01:14:09So, we want Mom to sell, and there's no getting in the way of that.
01:14:12Now, we have some money to win back.
01:14:14This time, it's on our rules.
01:14:17Number two tens for a five.
01:14:18No more word games.
01:14:20It's time we're playing cards.
01:14:22These cards never lie.
01:14:24I don't know how to play cards.
01:14:26Well, it's very easy.
01:14:27I'll pick a card from the deck, bet you $10 versus everything you stole from us today.
01:14:32What's the game?
01:14:33You just have to guess the card.
01:14:35Simple, right?
01:14:39So, what card am I holding, jewels?
01:14:42Four of spades.
01:14:44Four of spades?
01:14:46What?
01:14:47No, no, no, no, no, no.
01:14:49Best two out of three.
01:14:50Now, what card am I holding?
01:14:55Ten of diamonds.
01:14:57Ten of diamonds.
01:14:59What the?
01:15:01Oh, come on, seriously?
01:15:03Can you see what card I'm holding?
01:15:07No.
01:15:09It's impossible.
01:15:10Well, only pretty boy can answer this time.
01:15:13So, what card am I holding, pretty boy?
01:15:16King of hearts.
01:15:18Oh, I don't know.
01:15:21I'm just going to have to take a wild guess, King of hearts.
01:15:25What the?
01:15:34Pete, what are you doing?
01:15:36I don't know.
01:15:37They guessed the cards.
01:15:39I don't know how.
01:15:39I can't explain it.
01:15:40That was actually kind of fun.
01:15:46That was actually kind of cheating, but you're right, it was fun.
01:15:48Shoot.
01:15:49I forgot the horseshoe.
01:15:50We'll just have to convince them without it.
01:15:52I just hope we're not too late.
01:15:54I can't believe you gave them all our money.
01:15:56They guessed the card?
01:15:57What was I supposed to do?
01:15:58Get our money back.
01:15:59That was the plan, idiot.
01:16:00Don't call me an idiot, moron.
01:16:01Don't call me a moron, idiot.
01:16:02How did that feel?
01:16:05Give me that.
01:16:09Did I knock some sense into you?
01:16:10Yeah, let me give you back the change.
01:16:14Oh, did that hurt?
01:16:15Let me divert the pain.
01:16:20Kids, remember, don't try this at home.
01:16:23If I could just chime in here, for the record, I think you're both idiots.
01:16:30Who asked you?
01:16:32It is I, Horatio, king of all horses, ruler of the stable, drinker from the sacred bucket,
01:16:40and eater of the holy hay and foolish young boys.
01:16:45Those who toy with my magical horseshoe must endure my wrath.
01:16:50Please, no.
01:16:51We didn't mean it.
01:16:53Listen to me now, or perish.
01:16:56What breed of horse can jump higher than a house?
01:16:59All breeds.
01:17:01Houses don't jump.
01:17:03What part of a horse has the most hair?
01:17:06The outside.
01:17:09What do you call a horse wearing a Venetian blind?
01:17:13A zebra.
01:17:15Oh, God.
01:17:16Make it stop.
01:17:17That one didn't even make sense.
01:17:19Don't worry, boys.
01:17:20I got a million of them.
01:17:21What's a horse's favorite sickness?
01:17:24Hay fever.
01:17:25Trust me.
01:17:31You won't be sorry.
01:17:49Well, I guess one can't stand in the way of progress.
01:17:55Mom, no.
01:17:56You can't sign.
01:17:56You promised.
01:17:57Dad, did you close the deal?
01:17:59Look around, son.
01:18:01It's all ours.
01:18:02Jules, I know you're upset, but believe me.
01:18:05It's for the best.
01:18:06No, you're wrong.
01:18:08They can't tear down this place.
01:18:10It will destroy the magic.
01:18:12What will happen to Horatio?
01:18:13She's right, Dad.
01:18:14This isn't a normal ranch.
01:18:16It's special.
01:18:18It's one of a kind.
01:18:20The people or the place?
01:18:23Both.
01:18:25They have a talking horse.
01:18:26I know it sounds insane, but he really can talk.
01:18:29It's true, Mom.
01:18:30Not everyone can hear him, but if I just smash you around with-
01:18:34Jules, enough with the games.
01:18:36We'll be happy in the city.
01:18:37You'll see.
01:18:38It'll just take a little getting used to.
01:18:41Where are your brothers?
01:18:42I want to give them the good news.
01:18:44Dad, trust me.
01:18:44Just one swift hit on the head with that thing and you'll see.
01:18:47Don't worry about the brain damage.
01:18:49It'll pass.
01:18:50That won't be necessary, son.
01:18:51I've seen the light and this place is going to be huge.
01:18:54People are going to come from miles around.
01:18:56But it does require one special ingredient to make the whole thing work.
01:19:00I will absolutely need Miss Bell to manage the place.
01:19:04But, Mr. Beatle, I don't know anything about running a mall.
01:19:08Well, you know just about everything else.
01:19:11And once people come and drink your amazing tea,
01:19:13breathe in the air, and get away from the city,
01:19:16they're going to feel 20 years younger.
01:19:18I know.
01:19:18I'm not just the owner.
01:19:20I'm also a client.
01:19:21So, welcome to Bell and Beatle's Wonder Ranch,
01:19:24where dreams come true.
01:19:25How's that sound?
01:19:27Monty, do you mean it?
01:19:29You mean we can stay?
01:19:30Dad, are you feeling okay?
01:19:32The answer is yes, yes, and a big, fat yes.
01:19:35I've never felt better.
01:19:37And what about Horatio?
01:19:38Horatio can stay.
01:19:39The animals can stay.
01:19:40We'll get more animals.
01:19:41I want to build this place up to be the most fantastic ranch
01:19:43for humans and animals alike.
01:19:45Let them intermingle.
01:19:46People can pet the animals, can talk to the animals.
01:19:49And some of them might even talk back to you.
01:19:52When did you decide to do all of this?
01:19:53Well, I believe I came down with something since we first arrived here.
01:19:58Oh, really?
01:19:58Is it contagious?
01:20:00I believe so.
01:20:01Well, it comes about when someone gets too far away from their past.
01:20:06I believe I'm homesick.
01:20:09Dad, did you just make a joke?
01:20:12I don't know.
01:20:13Do bad jokes count?
01:20:14Around here they do.
01:20:15Just ask Horatio.
01:20:17We have to tell Horatio.
01:20:19I love you, Mom.
01:20:20You too, Dad.
01:20:21This is great.
01:20:24Well, I think I finally made my son proud.
01:20:27I think the kids have really hit it off.
01:20:30Yeah, with horseshoes.
01:20:32Is that a joke?
01:20:35Watch out.
01:20:36You could just become funny.
01:20:38Yeah?
01:20:39I'll work on it.
01:20:40How about you give me lessons over dinner tonight, Kimberly?
01:20:42Do you like lasagna?
01:20:45I think it may soon become one of my favorite dishes.
01:20:47I can't believe we did it.
01:21:16We didn't even have to prove Horatio could speak.
01:21:19Perhaps it's better if we keep that secret to ourselves.
01:21:22If word gets out that we have a talking horse,
01:21:24everyone will start trying to exploit him.
01:21:27There will be t-shirts, lunch boxes, marketing gimmicks galore.
01:21:30Someone will probably even make a movie about him.
01:21:32Yeah.
01:21:33I guess you're right.
01:21:34We don't need another talking horse movie.
01:21:39No more.
01:21:40No more bad jokes.
01:21:43No more.
01:21:44No more bad jokes.
01:21:45Just stop.
01:21:47Last time, please, let it end.
01:21:48It has to stop.
01:21:49Last time, please, just let it end.
01:21:52That was odd.
01:21:54I wonder what that was about.
01:21:55There's nothing like a friend
01:21:58Lift you when you're down
01:22:00Spin your world around
01:22:03Make it fun again
01:22:05We're not here all alone
01:22:08Even if we spend some time alone
01:22:12Help to know
01:22:13There's a place to go
01:22:15Cause you and me
01:22:18That's how it's meant to be
01:22:21Laughing with each other
01:22:23Through the years
01:22:25flourish in like
01:22:26Heий
01:22:26Woo
01:22:27Ho ho ho ho
01:22:28Oh ho ho ho
01:22:30similar to me
01:22:30Weと
01:22:31You and me
01:22:32Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee ho ho ho ho ho
01:22:35п's own
01:22:35Wasn't sure you infantil in me
01:22:36There's nothing like that
01:22:36Not only
01:22:37You and me
01:22:38The still
01:22:38of fear
01:22:38Where the
01:22:40Is u
01:22:40Christian
01:22:41E
01:22:41Th
01:22:41The
01:22:42Is
01:22:42O
01:22:43Spirit
01:22:44Of
01:22:45Of
01:22:46You
01:22:46With
01:22:47Heine
01:22:48Two
01:22:48Pour
01:22:48Put
01:22:49,
01:22:49objections
01:22:50Up
01:22:51The
01:22:53What
01:24:23It's been a great audience.
01:24:24I hope you all have enjoyed my little tale.
01:24:28But as you can see, this is definitely the end.