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Squirrel Won't Let Woman Leave Her Home
The Dodo
Follow
11/21/2024
This woman is in a "hostage situation" with a squirrel. She tries three different strategies to try and escape — but when the squirrel brings her babies, it's double the trouble. We spoke with Agata who walked us through the entire situation.
Category
🐳
Animals
Transcript
Display full video transcript
00:00
Glenda has been keeping me in a hostage situation since 2020.
00:04
This is Glenda. She's a squirrel, obviously.
00:07
I am her prisoner.
00:10
Glenda, I'm just trying to leave my apartment.
00:13
If I accidentally leave the door open, she has no problem coming inside.
00:17
Hi, Glenda.
00:18
I don't think Glenda wants to be my roommate.
00:21
I believe that if I let her live here, I'll come home to changed locks
00:25
and an eviction notice scribbled by her tiny little creepy hands.
00:30
This is the day we met four years ago.
00:33
I was just going in for my morning coffee and she just popped up in the kitchen.
00:37
Oh, okay. I guess I should start wearing pants.
00:39
She figured out the lay of the land pretty quickly and now knows every window in my apartment.
00:48
For a while, I thought maybe I'm her TV,
00:51
but if that's the case, she has definitely lost the remote.
00:55
It's a serious problem because I can't even leave the house anymore.
00:59
Glenda, you're being a weirdo.
01:00
I decided I have to do something about it.
01:06
I had to cat sit for my friends once,
01:08
and I thought maybe this will be a great opportunity for Glenda to just back off and chill out.
01:14
But she just seduced them and they became best friends.
01:18
The cats did not scare her when I'm about to leave the apartment.
01:21
She knows I'm easily manipulated and weak, so she takes full advantage of that.
01:26
I tried to negotiate with Nuts.
01:29
Look at her, freaking out.
01:31
It's a Nut emergency.
01:33
This is how we do it.
01:36
It usually gives me enough time for a quick escape,
01:39
but then she completely destroys my plans trying to hide this treasure.
01:44
There's never enough Nuts.
01:46
Never enough Nuts.
01:50
Sometimes I go dig him up.
01:51
Sometimes I go dig him up.
01:53
You know, Nuts are expensive, and she seems to think I'm Jeff Bezos.
01:57
So I re-gift them, hoping that she doesn't realize.
02:00
But she just re-pots them.
02:02
Thrifted almonds is not her jam.
02:04
So as you can tell, the negotiations are going terribly.
02:08
You might think, hey, this is cute.
02:09
It's just Glenda.
02:11
But no, Glenda brings all her boyfriends to the yard.
02:14
There's been Glen 1, Glen 2, Glen 3.
02:18
They bring their own Nuts, if you know what I mean.
02:20
Oh my god, it's a mini Glenda.
02:24
In the spring, she brings her babies around,
02:26
and they learn very quickly that I'm a total sucker.
02:31
But like, seriously, how can you resist this?
02:38
You probably can't tell by now, but I have fully given in.
02:42
Since she's a very hardworking mother, I figured I'll get her her own apartment.
02:46
She's done a few walkthroughs.
02:48
I'm just waiting for her to sign the lease.
02:51
So yeah, Glenda can be an absolute menace.
02:55
But it's okay.
02:56
I love her.
03:05
Don't do that.
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