Every Parent Needs To Know THIS One Simple Truth | Dr. Shefali - video Dailymotion

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How to Love Your Child the RIGHT WAY. Renowned child psychologist Dr.Shefali Tsabary dispenses life-changing messages on conscious parenting and loving your child in the most meaningful way.  #InspiringWomen #InspiringWomenSpeeches #MotivationalSpeaker

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00:00This is the greatest lesson for parents

00:03No one really truly loves anyone

00:06Everyone loves conditionally

00:08Most love is conditioned control based and fear based. It's all about the self. So we live off

00:15prescriptive checklists and

00:17believe that if we don't follow that checklist

00:19Then we are somehow lesser than and when we do this with a child who's come into this world with a throbbing spirit

00:26Desirous of kind of figuring it out and we've kind of already ruined that chance by you know, here's the checklist

00:32this is what I believe is success and failure and beauty and

00:36Achievement and now follow my way or you're already an outcast in my eyes this immediate

00:43placement of a way to be

00:46obscures the

00:48Ability for the child to develop their way and you will see most parents do not accept their children for who it is

00:54They are because they're not good enough or great enough or fabulous enough or not some accolade enough. Not a degree enough and

01:02Then the I show parents that the reason they can't do this

01:06Accept their child unequivocally for who it is. They are is because they haven't accepted themselves for who it is. They are

01:14The the main battle is my child is not who I thought my child would be either not a superstar soccer player

01:20fantastic pianist or obedient

01:23Genuflecting little servant, you know most parents who are raised on a diet of

01:29Overachievement on doing I have a very hard time understanding that their drive is not organic necessarily

01:35But coming out of their inadequacy their fear their lack

01:40They've just been indoctrinated to compensate for this and they've never fully healed from their encountering their ordinariness

01:47And so when I say that that's what's driving you and then they get in touch with their little boy

01:52Or little girl who truly felt ordinary and not good enough in that ordinariness

01:57That's when the epiphany occurs

01:59So then I make them see how it's now being projected onto the child

02:03Don't do this to your child your child is okay and whole in their ordinary ordinariness

02:07The child doesn't need more to feel more of themselves

02:11They didn't come with this egoic desire to attach to PhDs or labels or judgments or wealth to feel themselves

02:19Children feel themselves just by who it is. They are they are this they have the simplest access to wholeness

02:25We've robbed them of this to truly love someone

02:29It's truly loving the other for who it is. They are with no you in the picture

02:35They don't have to love you back. They don't have to need you. They don't have to agree with you

02:38They don't have to adhere to you now try loving your child for who it is. They are

02:48You

Every Parent Needs To Know THIS One Simple Truth | Dr. Shefali

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