- 6 days ago
The Three Badasses Who Want Me - Full Movie
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Ellen musk the only woman on the forbes 30 under 30 list arrives at Atlanta today what a business
00:00:12tycoon is doing here in Georgia a forgotten stage no one knows Angela my next-door neighbor still
00:00:19selling your hippie junk here if your mother-in-law sees she's gonna throw a big fit again your mother
00:00:27mom is right about you what's the point of watching the news all day about these mongrels if you can't
00:00:32even apply to your penniless self and how do you know that this is none of my all right everybody
00:00:39get out we got an important guest coming you deaf I said pack up and scram I paid this off here already
00:00:54and if you want me to leave then fine but you have to compensate for today's losses you want to say
00:01:01that again you know who's visiting today Ellen freaking musk one of the richest people in the
00:01:09world Ellen musk of course a hick like you probably never heard of her just know that you can't afford
00:01:15to piss her off really Ellen musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market
00:01:22you don't think that she could be coming to see me coming to see you all right I'll you know what
00:01:32I'll play your game if she does it so much as give you a glance I'll I'll eat dirt deal
00:01:41Ellen musk get to the flea market within 10 minutes or else you're fired
00:02:11prepare the limo miss Lockhart requires us immediately
00:02:17oh you're 10 minutes you're so messed up good hope you don't wet your pants five four
00:02:30three two one
00:02:38Ellen uh I mean miss musk uh Ellen uh I mean uh I'm sorry that I uh sorry to frighten you
00:02:49how's my boss bitch kick an ass girlfriend
00:02:53and so how do you like she's my boss and I prefer business partner or best friend no way
00:03:04well
00:03:08no no no I'm sorry for defending your boss no I won't do it again
00:03:15all right that's enough we're not tyrants here
00:03:22sir I found Angela Lockhart
00:03:31you mean Angela Lockhart
00:03:38my runaway pride
00:03:40you made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker who are you
00:03:47where is she
00:03:50Atlanta and you were right it was secretly her propping up Ellen musk
00:03:55my clever bride I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to
00:03:59Max prep the jet I'm heading to Atlanta
00:04:07Atlanta the game is afoot I'm going
00:04:18wait Dr. Wilson the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention
00:04:22he can wait I need to pick up my bride
00:04:24Dr. Wilson
00:04:29General Eisenhower reporting
00:04:36Devon Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta
00:04:40Atlanta
00:04:42where is that
00:04:44whatever prepare my war plate
00:04:47those who are going after my fiance
00:04:49this is war
00:04:51I've secretly allowed your husband Jared Cooper to win the bid on the maple
00:05:10plaza project like you asked me to
00:05:12thank you so much Ellen this is going to be the best anniversary gift ever
00:05:17that project is worth billions he can finally take his company public
00:05:21but Angela
00:05:23my boss
00:05:25I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever
00:05:30revealing your true identity
00:05:31without your backing
00:05:34no offense but he's nothing without you
00:05:36well
00:05:37three years ago
00:05:39you saved me
00:06:00he saved me and
00:06:06I fell in love with him instantly
00:06:08I didn't want to reveal my true identity
00:06:10because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress
00:06:14but now with this contract
00:06:17I feel like we'll be on more equal footing
00:06:19and then I can finally come out to the public
00:06:22so that's why you have me secretly helping him
00:06:25I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out
00:06:28but why work at the flea market
00:06:32are you
00:06:34disguising yourself to test him
00:06:36well these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find
00:06:42plus I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom
00:06:46you seem happy being a housewife
00:06:48where the hell are you
00:06:53don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again
00:06:56get home stacked
00:06:58it's a big day today
00:07:00that was
00:07:02my mother-in-law Carol
00:07:05she judges me because she thinks I come from a lower class family
00:07:08but she's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am
00:07:13you know she even remembered our third year anniversary
00:07:17please spend more time with my son
00:07:25hi I'm home
00:07:28I have a big announcement I have to make
00:07:31finally you're back
00:07:32now sign the divorce papers
00:07:34divorce papers
00:07:38is this some sort of misunderstanding mom
00:07:42oh god don't call me mom again
00:07:46we're ending that relationship
00:07:48just look at you dirt all over
00:07:51you're selling the title of mrs. cooper
00:07:53you don't deserve my son you're way below his league
00:07:57I'm below his league
00:07:59that's right
00:08:00you are
00:08:02Jared is signing a hundred billion dollar contract tomorrow with the Ellen Musk
00:08:08and then his company's going public
00:08:11that's how much he's accomplished in three years
00:08:14but you
00:08:14you're still just
00:08:16a stinky hippie peddler
00:08:19Jared's like the king in the clouds
00:08:22and you
00:08:23you
00:08:24will always just be a pawn
00:08:27like dirt
00:08:28on our shoes
00:08:31dirt on your shoes
00:08:34but Ellen Musk works for me
00:08:37you're delusional
00:08:39you will never upgrade to a queen
00:08:42how dare you compare yourself to the real deal here
00:08:46resorting to lies
00:08:49definitely not good enough for Jared
00:08:51and
00:08:52who are you
00:08:53to come into my house
00:08:55and meddle with my family matters
00:08:57you're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife
00:09:02Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee
00:09:07not a low-life dirtbag
00:09:09enough
00:09:09Jared
00:09:11I knew you wouldn't divorce me
00:09:14but I am
00:09:16don't fight it Angela
00:09:18here's 500k
00:09:21you'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices
00:09:25now sign the papers
00:09:26take your check
00:09:27and leave
00:09:28don't embarrass yourself further
00:09:30I've done
00:09:33so much for you these past three years
00:09:36did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:39I didn't expect you to be so greedy
00:09:41fine
00:09:43here's another 200,000
00:09:45500,000 is too much for her already
00:09:49she's done nothing
00:09:51hasn't even contributed a grandchild
00:09:54she just sells cheap grass all day
00:09:56is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:10:00I took care of both of you these past three years
00:10:04you think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something
00:10:09and she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench
00:10:13a hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO
00:10:17what a joke
00:10:19if you actually love my son
00:10:22you'll sign the damn divorce papers already
00:10:25and leave
00:10:26you really think that Jared would have gotten that maple plaza bid without me?
00:10:32let alone taking the company public?
00:10:35I did everything for you Jared
00:10:39now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:42it's all my work
00:10:49baby
00:10:50we're gonna be late for the auction
00:10:53if we keep letting this psycho stall us
00:10:57you did say you would win me princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:11:02so, she's the reason for the divorce
00:11:06she's worth more than you, Angela
00:11:10fine
00:11:12I'll sign it
00:11:14but don't regret it
00:11:17regret?
00:11:19you know who I am
00:11:21yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed
00:11:25I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter
00:11:29Jared winning the bid on maple plaza was because of my dad
00:11:34because he's business partners with Elon Musk
00:11:37it's part of the power that I have as an elite
00:11:42you can't do shit because you're poor
00:11:46social stratum matters
00:11:48yeah, social stratum does matter
00:11:52and the coopers are beneath me
00:11:55and you really think Elon Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:12:00ha! you're delusional
00:12:03now sign the peepers and scram!
00:12:07you owe me
00:12:11you dirty bitch
00:12:13you sickened me
00:12:14ah!
00:12:20you hit me
00:12:24now sign the peepers, take your check and get the fuck out
00:12:28I don't need your penny money
00:12:47we're finished
00:12:49you don't want the money that's your loss
00:12:51your check is just pennies to me
00:12:53but
00:12:55I would like my ring back
00:13:05have fun
00:13:07on your economy flight
00:13:09while I catch you out of my private helicopter out of here
00:13:13and I'm way out of your league
00:13:19isn't that the Winston blue diamond ring?
00:13:28it's worth tens of millions of dollars
00:13:32oh, it's probably just cheap glass
00:13:35something she found at the flea market
00:13:36you're right
00:13:38she could never afford anything so expensive
00:13:43congrats, Jared Boo Boo
00:13:45on getting rid of that dirt bag
00:13:48oh, my dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit
00:13:55bigger big shot than ellen musk
00:13:57yeah
00:13:58and nobody's met them
00:13:59but I can introduce you
00:14:01everything's thanks to you, babe
00:14:05uh, Angela
00:14:22Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia
00:14:24wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding
00:14:26Vanderbilt?
00:14:28yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies
00:14:31basically our employee
00:14:32okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow
00:14:34it's fine
00:14:35well, you're still going to the summit tomorrow?
00:14:37but you and Jared Cooper are already divorced
00:14:39that's exactly why I'm going
00:14:41Angela Lockhart
00:14:51I finally found you
00:14:53who, who, who is he?
00:15:08that, that's Devon Sterling
00:15:10he's number one on Forbes 30 under 30 list
00:15:12he's number one on Forbes 30 under 30 list
00:15:14and early investor of crypto
00:15:16CEO of Sterling Enterprises
00:15:18rumor has that he's worth trillions
00:15:20and he's
00:15:22your fiancé
00:15:24what?
00:15:25what?
00:15:26my fiancé?
00:15:27the one and only
00:15:30so
00:15:31after running away
00:15:32and leaving me single for three years
00:15:34have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet?
00:15:38babe
00:15:40that tiara looks perfect on you
00:15:50what is she doing here?
00:15:56you skank
00:16:00my son just divorced you yesterday
00:16:02and you're already hooking up with another man
00:16:04divorced?
00:16:06that's right
00:16:08so
00:16:09I guess this was never meant to be
00:16:11Mr..
00:16:12Sterling
00:16:14Kevin
00:16:15Sterling
00:16:16so she has to hide her marital status to find another man
00:16:20guess she's not just a forsaken woman
00:16:22she's also a stinky
00:16:24penniless whore
00:16:28how dare you insult my boss like that?
00:16:31who the fuck are you bitch?
00:16:34do you know who I am?
00:16:36they don't know who you are
00:16:38they don't know who you are
00:16:40you hide it well
00:16:42X-Team!
00:16:44teach these fools a lesson
00:16:46teach these fools a lesson
00:16:48teach these fools a lesson
00:16:53sir you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta
00:16:56and then to New York
00:16:57you forgot to bring the security team
00:16:59mind if I borrow your men?
00:17:11toss these ill-mannered apes out!
00:17:13oh you bitch
00:17:15I'll have my son teach you a real lesson!
00:17:19a kiss
00:17:25as a reward
00:17:27my lady
00:17:28no
00:17:37guest list is very distinguished tonight
00:17:39you've got
00:17:40Bill Ford
00:17:41Harvey Buffet
00:17:42old money like me
00:17:44gentlemen
00:17:45Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper
00:17:47pleased to meet you all
00:17:49your families all started empires
00:17:51after the industrial revolution
00:17:52what an honor
00:17:53I heard you secured the
00:17:55maple plaza project
00:17:56it's worth billions of dollars
00:17:58congrats
00:17:59you'll be next
00:18:00thank you
00:18:01but we haven't received a contract yet
00:18:03we deserve it
00:18:04hard
00:18:05oh that's nothing
00:18:06I introduced this kid to ellen musk
00:18:07vanderbilts and miss musk
00:18:09have always had a good relationship
00:18:10so
00:18:11thought I'd help the kid out
00:18:13pull a few strings
00:18:14thank you mr. man
00:18:16now
00:18:17we just have to impress
00:18:18miss musk's special guest of honor
00:18:20yes
00:18:21I heard they're a very important
00:18:23and powerful guest
00:18:25even wealthier
00:18:27than ellen musk
00:18:28now
00:18:29if we can just secure a position
00:18:30with his
00:18:31big shot
00:18:32we can feast
00:18:33for generations
00:18:35up to my best
00:18:38up to my best
00:18:43excuse me
00:18:44second children
00:18:46what if it's the prince of Bhutan
00:18:51how did a hobo like you sneak in here
00:18:53me
00:18:54a hobo
00:18:55how did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here
00:18:58sleep your way in
00:18:59I told you Angela Lockhart don't bother stalking me
00:19:02nothing will come of it
00:19:04and it only sickens me further
00:19:05don't flatter yourself
00:19:10this
00:19:11is your ex-husband?
00:19:14what were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:19:16who the hell is this?
00:19:17you were cheating on me?
00:19:19son
00:19:20you have to avenge me and Kaylee
00:19:21that wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up
00:19:26they even took Kaylee's tiara
00:19:30son
00:19:31son
00:19:32son
00:19:33son
00:19:34son
00:19:35son
00:19:36son
00:19:37son
00:19:38son
00:19:39son
00:19:40son
00:19:41son
00:19:42son
00:19:43son
00:19:44son
00:19:45son
00:19:46son
00:19:47son
00:19:48son
00:19:49son
00:19:50son
00:20:18son
00:20:19son
00:20:20son
00:20:21son
00:20:22son
00:20:23son
00:20:24son
00:20:25son
00:20:26son
00:20:27son
00:20:28son
00:20:29son
00:20:30son
00:20:31son
00:20:32son
00:20:33son
00:20:34son
00:20:35son
00:20:36son
00:20:37son
00:20:38son
00:20:39son
00:20:40son
00:20:41son
00:20:42son
00:20:43son
00:20:44son
00:20:45Oh, shut up, old man. You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:52Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:54That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:56You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:20:59His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:21:03The Civil War would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:21:06Vanderbilt.
00:21:08The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:21:13who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:21:18That, Lolly Vanderbilt family?
00:21:27Oh, goddammit, a stomach ache now?
00:21:33Mmm, whatever. Angela can handle herself, she'll be fine.
00:21:43How dare you call one of us low?
00:21:52I'm Harvey F. M. Buffett, the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:57I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:22:02And I can wipe you out with a strand of my hair.
00:22:06Not with me around.
00:22:08I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:22:13You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:22:18You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:22:20We've had enough of your games.
00:22:22Security!
00:22:23Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:26Looks like the old guard is teaming up against ya.
00:22:29But don't worry.
00:22:31You got new money here.
00:22:35I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:37Yes, my queen.
00:22:39You're all despicable.
00:22:42An insult to your family names.
00:22:44Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:50Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:53Cut off all business ties.
00:22:56And if you don't,
00:22:58I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:23:03Ha! I knew it!
00:23:05You're here to fuck with me.
00:23:06You can't fool anyone here.
00:23:08How much money did you spend on that kid up
00:23:10to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:23:12You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:23:17You have nothing.
00:23:18And you will always be nothing.
00:23:21She's a gold digger.
00:23:24Gold digger.
00:23:25Gigolo.
00:23:27Wanna try me for a night?
00:23:29Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:32Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:35They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:23:37Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:23:39She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza.
00:23:41Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:23:45Security!
00:23:50Security!
00:23:52You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:23:56And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:58You!
00:24:00Insolent fools.
00:24:01Let me guess.
00:24:02You're that special guest?
00:24:03I don't know.
00:24:04Throw them out!
00:24:05And not without some broken bones, too.
00:24:07Back down, Max.
00:24:08I got this.
00:24:10You!
00:24:11Oh!
00:24:16Oh!
00:24:17Back down, Max.
00:24:23I got this.
00:24:43Hey!
00:24:47What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:54I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:55No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:24:59Oh my god, we're so screwed!
00:25:10Angela!
00:25:12Don't hurt her!
00:25:13You bitch.
00:25:14I've always been sick of you.
00:25:16You just threw yourself at me.
00:25:17How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:25:20Boss?
00:25:20Did she say her boss?
00:25:22Miss Musk.
00:25:24That's Ellen Musk?
00:25:26That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:28My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:32Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:35Past the American Revolution?
00:25:37Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:38If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:25:42That's Lady Lockhart to you.
00:25:43She's royalty.
00:25:44And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:25:48What are you going to do?
00:25:50Kneel to me.
00:25:51Oh, your majesty.
00:25:54Welcome to the United States.
00:25:58We've always been your loyal subjects.
00:26:01Yes, your highness.
00:26:03Is it a queen or princess?
00:26:05It doesn't matter.
00:26:07My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:26:10We didn't mean to offend.
00:26:13Hey, what are you doing, idiot?
00:26:14Let go of the boss, lady, and beg for forgiveness.
00:26:27What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:29She's a badass herself.
00:26:48He missed out on a good wife.
00:26:50You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:26:55Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:26:58No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:26:59I worked hard for everything.
00:27:01You worked for everything?
00:27:08Hi, honey.
00:27:10So, our third year anniversary is coming up,
00:27:13and I thought that maybe we can do something special this year.
00:27:15I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:27:17I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Closet Project,
00:27:21and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:27:25Oh, my God.
00:27:26You were nothing before me.
00:27:34All your achievements, all your glory,
00:27:37that's all mine,
00:27:39including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:27:41I can take all of that away just like that.
00:27:47No, you can't take that away from me.
00:27:48So that's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:27:52Oh, and this antique wedding ring?
00:27:56Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:27:58It was Queen Victoria's,
00:27:59and it's worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:28:09No.
00:28:10I gave you back the ring?
00:28:12I divorced a royal heiress?
00:28:14No, no, no, please, no, no, please take me back, baby.
00:28:19I still love you.
00:28:24Oh, man, looks like they've started the party without us.
00:28:27No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower.
00:28:36I got these two again.
00:28:38Did he say, is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:41President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:28:43After General Eisenhower won World War II,
00:28:45each of his descendants have all gone on to become five-star generals,
00:28:48the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:28:50Glad you buffoons know your history.
00:28:52Sorry, I'm late, babe.
00:28:53I got lost trying to find Atlanta,
00:28:55then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:29:02And that there is,
00:29:03that is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:29:07He's Dr. House's protege.
00:29:09Dr. House?
00:29:10Yes.
00:29:11I thought that was just a TV show.
00:29:12Oh, no, that's based on real thinking.
00:29:14Yep, that's me.
00:29:16Son of James House.
00:29:17Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:29:20I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him
00:29:22when I was just 12 years old.
00:29:24So he's been off crying himself a waterfall
00:29:26somewhere in the Netherlands for the last 15 years.
00:29:29And I'm late because I ran out of gum
00:29:31and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:33Hey, Alan, who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:29:41Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:29:44What?
00:29:46Fiancés?
00:29:49Plural?
00:29:50Fiancés?
00:29:51Plural?
00:29:53Watch it, nerds.
00:29:54I'm her fiancés.
00:29:55I'm her fiancés.
00:29:56No, I'm her fiancés.
00:29:57You can both shut up.
00:29:58I'm her fiancés.
00:29:59It's you.
00:30:00It's me.
00:30:01Who the hell is he?
00:30:03I'm Spider-Man.
00:30:05How are all three of these men my fiancés?
00:30:10Fiancés, uh, your father had arranged
00:30:12these engagements years ago,
00:30:13but I didn't tell you because you decided
00:30:15to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:30:18She has three bad-ass fiancés
00:30:20and she marries his dumbass.
00:30:25Whatever.
00:30:26Since you're all here,
00:30:28help me finish him.
00:30:31Since you're all here,
00:30:33help me finish him.
00:30:36At your service.
00:30:38Me too.
00:30:40No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:30:44One down, two more to go.
00:30:45She's become queen.
00:30:47Bishop to g4.
00:30:52Ow, ow, ow, ow, what is that?
00:30:56The most German fest and water in the Nile River.
00:30:59Ah!
00:31:02Rook to a8.
00:31:08Hello.
00:31:10I thought I was king.
00:31:13No, you wish.
00:31:14The king doesn't do anything,
00:31:16so Ellen can be my king.
00:31:18Oh, fine.
00:31:23Bacrop the forwards right this second.
00:31:29I...
00:31:30I've been bankrupt.
00:31:33No!
00:31:34I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:49Well, guess what?
00:31:50Game over.
00:31:51All right, boys.
00:31:53Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:54Oh, well, that's serious business.
00:31:57I'm right with you.
00:32:00Wait for me.
00:32:01Nobody beats me to the finish line.
00:32:12Angela!
00:32:12You already have three fiancés?
00:32:18You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:32:20I...
00:32:21want compensation.
00:32:25You greedy SOB.
00:32:27Who the fuck is that?
00:32:28My ex-husband.
00:32:30Wait, you were married?
00:32:31Yeah, and if that's a problem for you,
00:32:34then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:32:37More for me.
00:32:38No, no, of course not.
00:32:39Just...
00:32:40do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:42Don't steal my joke.
00:32:44I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:32:46All evidence of your past with him will be gone.
00:32:49What?
00:32:50Is there something on my face?
00:32:51Uh, yeah.
00:32:53Murderous intent.
00:32:53Let's re-marry.
00:32:57Let's re-marry.
00:32:59You still don't realize.
00:33:01I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:33:23The End
00:33:31Sir, it's an emergency.
00:33:33We need to wreck right away.
00:33:35Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:33:39Okay, I'm on my way.
00:33:43She should be okay now.
00:33:48Hey, you!
00:33:50Watch over here.
00:33:51I'll be right back.
00:33:53You saved me.
00:34:03Fuck.
00:34:04I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:08Fuck.
00:34:09I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:12You've cheated on me, you've hit me, and you've insulted me.
00:34:16And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:34:20I fucking hate you.
00:34:23Little Lady Lockhart.
00:34:25What now?
00:34:27Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person,
00:34:32but if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:34:36How about us three?
00:34:37Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:34:40Yeah, no. You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:34:44This is your fault, you doofus! We never should have believed your bullshit!
00:34:50No! No! We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockhart.
00:34:57Help me!
00:34:59I'll get you for this!
00:35:07Never should have listened to you!
00:35:09I'm ruined because of you!
00:35:24So...
00:35:25What's the situation here?
00:35:27I want to marry you!
00:35:37I want to marry you!
00:35:40Listen...
00:35:42I only met you guys a few hours ago, and...
00:35:45I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:47But...
00:35:48What if I told you...
00:35:50That we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours?
00:35:53Much longer...
00:35:57Angela?
00:35:59Your parents would like to have a video call with...
00:36:02All of you?
00:36:03My lovely princess, how are you?
00:36:08Look!
00:36:09Your mother and I are in Italy!
00:36:10The views here are absolutely stunning!
00:36:13Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:36:16I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing blood-sucking free little husband of yours.
00:36:23Can't call his name, but...
00:36:25Anyway...
00:36:26Congratulations!
00:36:27I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:36:33You must pick one of them to marry, otherwise...
00:36:37Let me do it!
00:36:39You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:36:42Otherwise...
00:36:44We'll kill ourselves.
00:36:46Mom!
00:36:48Alright honey, that's it!
00:36:50Bye!
00:36:51Bye!
00:36:55So...
00:36:56Who are you going to choose?
00:36:59Well...
00:37:00What if I...
00:37:01Want all three of you?
00:37:04Well...
00:37:06What if I...
00:37:07Want all three of you?
00:37:10That seems greedy.
00:37:17But...
00:37:19I can always remove the other two options.
00:37:22Hey!
00:37:23I may be a doctor,
00:37:24but I can take lives too.
00:37:26I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:37:30Whoa!
00:37:31Okay!
00:37:32No murder, please!
00:37:33I was just kidding.
00:37:36We have seven days to win her over.
00:37:39Ooh!
00:37:40It's like the Bachelorette!
00:37:42I know!
00:37:43We'll start with challenge one.
00:37:47Welcome to the show, the three badasses who want me.
00:37:50Today...
00:37:51Today...
00:37:52We have our first challenge.
00:37:55What...
00:37:56Is...
00:37:57All of this, Ellen?
00:37:58You'll see.
00:38:07Oh my god! Oh my god! Cockroaches!
00:38:09Cockroaches!
00:38:10All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:38:12And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:38:18What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single but screaming her head off heiress?
00:38:24Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:38:36It's up to the final two!
00:38:54Crunchy.
00:38:55That is sick, Cole.
00:38:56Hey!
00:38:57When you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield, you'll be glad to see one of these around.
00:39:11There are two more left.
00:39:12Wanna try one?
00:39:13Oh my god!
00:39:14No!
00:39:15No!
00:39:17Oh my god!
00:39:18Save me!
00:39:19Save you!
00:39:20Save me!
00:39:21I'm a German folk doctor.
00:39:25These hands can't get germs on them.
00:39:27They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:39:44Thank god you're here.
00:39:48Are you alright, honey?
00:39:50Angela!
00:39:53Alright, you won the first challenge, so your reward?
00:39:56You get to watch over her for the night.
00:39:59Just don't cross the line if you know what I mean.
00:40:01I'm not her scumbag husband.
00:40:03You have nothing to worry about.
00:40:10Honestly, even if you guys fuck, it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:40:13At least my girlfriend gets some.
00:40:15I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:40:20They're cockroaches.
00:40:21They're gone, they're gone.
00:40:23There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:40:26I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:40:34I need a drink.
00:40:35I need a drink.
00:40:36I need a drink.
00:40:37I need a drink.
00:40:43Whoa, easy!
00:40:44You're on an empty stomach.
00:40:46Why do you care?
00:40:48Are you trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela?
00:40:50You guys were right.
00:40:55I was blind for marrying that asshole.
00:40:58You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:41:05He never even loved me.
00:41:07And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:41:09Do you really think that you would still be number one on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:41:21You may not be number one on the Forbes list, but you know what you're number one in.
00:41:26What?
00:41:30You're number one here.
00:41:31You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:41:41Lies.
00:41:44You all just want something from me.
00:41:51Angela.
00:41:53I know it's hard to trust again.
00:41:56But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:42:02I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:42:04I don't need your power, your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:42:12I just need you.
00:42:16I'll prove my love to you within six days.
00:42:18I promise.
00:42:26Screw the contest.
00:42:32I just want love.
00:42:35Angela.
00:42:37You're drunk.
00:42:39I'm an adult. Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:42:42Okay.
00:42:48But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:42:51Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:43:03This is what you want.
00:43:04This is what you want.
00:43:31Night inch penis.
00:43:32Morning to you too.
00:43:35You sure you were drunk last night?
00:43:37You wouldn't-
00:43:38A girl remembers when she's had a nine inch penis inside of her.
00:43:43Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:43:46But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:43:49Because then they would-
00:43:51Say that you were being unfair?
00:43:53Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:43:55I won the first challenge and according to Ellen, my prize was to spend a night with you anyways.
00:44:03Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:44:06Yes.
00:44:10Are you sure you don't want a pretty heart?
00:44:13It's not.
00:44:17Fine, fine, fine.
00:44:19I won't tell.
00:44:23But only on one condition.
00:44:27I won't tell.
00:44:29But only on one condition.
00:44:31You have to go out on a date with me.
00:44:35Fine.
00:44:36I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:44:42You never noticed me.
00:44:46Well, uh, you should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:44:51It's only 7am.
00:44:55She's still sleeping.
00:44:56I'm not sleeping alone.
00:44:57Yeah, I'm not letting my fiance be alone with another man for another second.
00:45:04Morning, gentlemen.
00:45:05Oh, or shall I say Ruffman?
00:45:08Oh, don't mind him.
00:45:10What's up, guys?
00:45:12We're ready for the second challenge.
00:45:14No cockroaches this time.
00:45:16Yes.
00:45:17No more terrifying things.
00:45:18That was my bad, Angela.
00:45:19This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:45:22I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:45:24The second challenge is...
00:45:26The second challenge is...
00:45:28A date.
00:45:29Lane, I should have asked for something else.
00:45:31A date?
00:45:33That's it.
00:45:34What's the catch?
00:45:35No catch.
00:45:36Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:45:39As simple as that.
00:45:40I know what I want to do.
00:45:41Let's start with me first.
00:45:42Okay, goals up first.
00:45:43Then...
00:45:44Me.
00:45:45Saved the best for last.
00:45:47Ain't that right, Angela?
00:45:49Then it's decided.
00:45:53Please, don't take my BMW away!
00:45:56Too bad.
00:45:58You pissed off the Lockhart's.
00:46:00I have nothing left!
00:46:02It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:15It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:17Do you know Eisenhower, sirs?
00:46:18Please, Lieutenant!
00:46:19This is my Lieutenant.
00:46:20He also manages this boxing job.
00:46:21Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:46:22He's so serious.
00:46:23But...
00:46:24Hang on.
00:46:25Lieutenant!
00:46:26I don't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:46:27Baby!
00:46:28I decided to take you here on our first date so that I can introduce you to my guns!
00:46:29Guns?
00:46:30Like...
00:46:31Murder weapons?
00:46:32Yes.
00:46:33Murder weapons.
00:46:34murder weapons!
00:46:35Okay, thanks so much.
00:46:36How much...
00:46:37no matter...
00:46:38It's not true.
00:46:39I wasn't sure if the Sun had the experience...
00:46:40I was not sure...
00:46:41I didn't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:46:42Baby!
00:46:43I decided to take you here on our first date so that I can introduce you to my guns!
00:46:45Guns...
00:46:46Like...
00:46:47Murder weapons?
00:46:48Yes.
00:46:50Murder weapons!
00:46:51you're like my guns babe pretty rock hard yeah let me show you what I can do with them lieutenant
00:47:18come close wait you're just gonna hit him like that he's not even gonna fight back fighting back
00:47:25will be treason ma'am treason you guys are way too serious look you awkward bitch I caught you
00:47:32if I'm going down you're all going down with me lieutenant pacer attack
00:47:37you dare try to hurt my wife I will make you pay you don't need to keep beating him up we
00:47:59could just take him to the cops not when he tries to hurt you
00:48:02so he's a bit violent some might call it being protective poor anger issues what if we get
00:48:15married and I forget to use a coaster on an antique table or something is he gonna be like rough
00:48:21hey some girls are into that I don't know if I am well maybe shame will be your type
00:48:32your date with Shane starts now
00:48:35hey cool ride a gift from the Chancellor of Germany when I saved his wife impressive
00:48:46your breath smells like peppermint refreshing I got cool mint too or do you prefer spearmint
00:48:58what do you not have in this coat of yours fruit flavor gum I can't stand those so where are you
00:49:06taking me to show you let me show you
00:49:08Dr. Wilson a VIP of VIPs right this way VIP of VIPs
00:49:21ah just some other guy saved I forget who you saved a lot of people oh my gosh it's my
00:49:32gold digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband Sandra Miller what are you doing here
00:49:38I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs your mother-in-law told me all about the
00:49:43divorce and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up hello of you what are you
00:49:51doing here Sandra of course your birdbrain wouldn't remember I sell high fashion jewelry pieces so
00:49:57high-end you couldn't even afford even if you sold your organs the auction begins I'll deal with you
00:50:04later
00:50:06yeah I'll just be one second
00:50:08Cameron I have a task for you
00:50:15our next piece is absolutely extraordinary Cleopatra's armband sold by our vendor Sandra Miller for five million dollars
00:50:28excuse me I'd like to donate this piece to auction it's Queen Victoria's ring I'd like to donate this piece to auction it's Queen Victoria's ring
00:50:40what are you doing
00:50:42just watch
00:50:44come on
00:50:46come on
00:50:48that is Queen Victoria's ring
00:50:50please
00:50:52I'm an expert and that's a fake
00:50:54she probably got it at the flea market she works at
00:50:56you work at a flea market
00:50:58not this again
00:51:00cut the bullshit that wouldn't even sell for five dollars
00:51:02oh yeah
00:51:04here you want it for free
00:51:06ew
00:51:08I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler
00:51:12well that's too bad then
00:51:14because you are the fraud
00:51:16what are you talking about
00:51:18who the hell are you to accuse me
00:51:20throw them out
00:51:22Dr. Wilson I know you're a legend in medicine
00:51:25but we're professionals
00:51:27oh yeah
00:51:28and that armband sells for five million dollars
00:51:31yeah
00:51:33mine is the real thing
00:51:35you two are just upset because you're too
00:51:37poor
00:51:38to afford our luxury items
00:51:40why was that so?
00:51:41would a so-called expert
00:51:43fail to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:51:45dear lord
00:51:47this is real
00:51:49it's authentic
00:51:51it's Queen Victoria's ring
00:51:57Cameron, what have you found?
00:51:59yeah that picture of Cleopatra's armband
00:52:01you sent me
00:52:03it's a replica
00:52:05they have the same one right here at the flea market
00:52:07so
00:52:09you are the fraud
00:52:11you just went to the flea market
00:52:13so you can buy some fakes
00:52:15and Cameron
00:52:16how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:52:18150
00:52:19wow
00:52:21not even five dollars
00:52:23Sandra
00:52:24you've been duping us the whole time
00:52:27arrest her
00:52:29no
00:52:31please
00:52:32it was just this one time
00:52:33please
00:52:34what's going on Dr. Wilson?
00:52:36uh
00:52:37investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry for the emperor in Japan
00:52:40bye
00:52:41black Calista from the jewelry industry forever
00:52:43I had a really great time tonight
00:52:54me too
00:52:56may i
00:52:57have a kiss
00:52:58something wrong?
00:53:00do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:53:04yep
00:53:06you never have to worry about stinky breath for me
00:53:10huh
00:53:11you
00:53:12always a bunch of money Cooper
00:53:13huh
00:53:14you
00:53:15always a bunch of money Cooper
00:53:17huh
00:53:18you
00:53:19always a bunch of money Cooper
00:53:20I don't have any money
00:53:21I don't have any money
00:53:22how did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:23i guess you'll only pay up
00:53:26if i break the money
00:53:27you
00:53:28don't have any money
00:53:29how did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:31i guess you'll only pay up
00:53:33if i break your other leg
00:53:34stop
00:53:36mr. vandeville
00:53:40mr. buffett
00:53:41mr. buffett
00:53:43mr. buffett
00:53:44hi
00:53:45hi
00:53:46hi
00:53:47hi
00:53:48hi
00:53:50hi
00:53:51hi
00:53:52hi
00:53:53hi
00:53:55hi
00:53:56hi
00:53:57hi
00:53:58hi
00:53:59hi
00:54:00hi
00:54:01hi
00:54:02hi
00:54:03this is the contract for the maple plaza project that's right miss musk wanted me to give it to
00:54:10you knew angela was still in love with me i knew angela was still in love with me no no sir
00:54:17sorry about those injuries from earlier it was all just uh just a little misunderstand
00:54:22yeah we could be partners again and then maybe you can um tell uh lady lockhart put in a good
00:54:30for us angela still loves me she's just throwing a fit she'll be back to me soon enough yeah do you
00:54:37need any help winning her back we can give you jewelry to give to her i was just sucking up to
00:54:43these pricks a few days ago and now they're all begging me to help them out it feels so damn good
00:54:48to be in power sure i'll put in a good word for you i just need anything you tell us we'll give you
00:54:57anything once i take everything from these idiots i'll go after angela lockhart for my revenge
00:55:05i'll give you the contract that you have to cool just like you asked me to well done he'll be
00:55:14fucked soon well done he'll be fucked soon i don't get it miss musk that contract has a preliminary
00:55:23clause it requires him to pay 50 of the costs up front as a deposit and if he can't then what
00:55:28he'll be bankrupt so as long as he's greedy enough to take it
00:55:32i'm avenging my best friend i want to show the world that without angela lockhart he's nothing
00:55:40i signed the maple plaza project we should celebrate you did you see i know my son has it in him
00:55:54that skank angela is nothing next to you and it's all thanks to you sweetheart actually it's thanks to
00:56:03angela what you're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife oh no no no he's not jared what are you
00:56:13doing you have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you it's my decision mom i'm the head of
00:56:20the house here i'm telling my dad fine go right ahead he has enough problems himself if you're obedient
00:56:27i'll keep you around as a side piece but if not you can scram dad jared is being mean to me teach
00:56:35him a lesson kaylee be a good girl okay jared has the backing of some very powerful people now
00:56:42don't get on his bad side we can't afford to piss him off so do as he says what dad
00:56:49i'm sorry be your side piece very good i'm happy you've come around now let's go celebrate
00:57:07i mean do i really want to be with mr minty mouth forever though but that tongue action though
00:57:13tongue is important in more than just one spot darling we are in public that's true oh stomach
00:57:21ache again i have to run to the bathroom devin should be here to pick you up soon okay devin's late
00:57:30not a good sign for a date this hotel restaurant has five michelin stars it's her she's alone with no
00:57:41one to save her you whore you seduced my son so he could get back with you
00:57:52let me tell you i would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me
00:58:01hey you guys can fight all you want you need to take this somewhere else
00:58:05whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this what why do i have to leave she's the one starting
00:58:10shit because i have money and you don't you're just a stinky hippie peddler and my son just signed a
00:58:17100 billion dollar contract he's still got the contract hmm must be ellen's doing even if he does sign it
00:58:27he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front oh he's just gonna bet you've never seen this
00:58:33much cash before bet you've never seen this much cash before you take my charity and toss it in my
00:58:43face as if it's your own my maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount one thousand dollars to take
00:58:50her away two thousand dollars to drag her away five thousand dollars to beat her away
00:59:00oh oh hey hey ow hey stop
00:59:03wake up you okay are you hurt
00:59:12weekly you you just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced
00:59:18and now you have two more what a whore what a whore yeah and jared wanted to get back with her
00:59:26what if she has an std oh like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an std
00:59:32let's go we'll expose her to jared hang on
00:59:37what do you want i i'll scream i don't hear a woman but i never said i don't kill
00:59:43i said i don't kill him i said i don't kill him oh god he is a murderer what if he murders me
00:59:54not him definitely not him
01:00:01we're not afraid of you that's enough this isn't a war zone you'll be removed from being a five-star
01:00:07general if he hurt a civilian without adequate cause i was just messing with them was he though
01:00:13we're not afraid of you jared you have to avenge us look at this slut she's found two more boy toys
01:00:21she's cheating on you don't get back with her oh mr cooper it's you i apologize for this scene
01:00:27i'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to his salvation banquet
01:00:31what did you say you were gonna toss out what did you say you were gonna toss out the potty crashes
01:00:37oh you have any idea who that is that's my wife please save that title for the real spank over
01:00:45there that's right know your place shut up she's cheating on you
01:00:52know your place you're just a side piece if i still want you that is eric have you gone mad
01:00:58this is eric vanderbilt's only daughter you slap her for this whore mom they really think there's
01:01:05something huh angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the victorian age
01:01:10she's richer even than ellen musk i only got the maple closet project because she gave it to me
01:01:17what you apologize right now or i will kick you and your father to the curb
01:01:29i'm sorry no this can't be i made you divorce
01:01:36go home you're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet
01:01:49i apologize on behalf of my mother honey i know you came here to celebrate my achievements
01:01:55i promise no one will bother you anymore i didn't come here for you i'm on a date
01:02:03a date with two men at the same time she really is a whore
01:02:08angela please forgive me i really do love you
01:02:14oh lady knockhart is here oh lady knockhart is here
01:02:22yeah yeah we we already know you beat ford's effort we're we're too old for that they're here
01:02:28for my celebration banquet please you gave me the contract so if anyone should go
01:02:33as my guest of honor it should be you oh yes please miss laghart join us we'll all be one happy
01:02:40business family again what the hell are you all doing here where were you stomach issues
01:02:47again would you like my diagnosis no let me make myself clear okay i would rather die than be with
01:02:59you again seems that they're not actually on good terms i can't lose face in front of these
01:03:06pricks otherwise they'll cut me off too angela i know you're still mad but please give me a chance
01:03:10i'll prove it to you you want a chance angela no you have three great guys here who all want to marry you
01:03:18don't take him back i'll give you two choices
01:03:24i'll give you two choices
01:03:25me or the contract you're kidding me no i'm not kidding you if you choose me we can remarry this
01:03:38week but you don't get the hundred billion dollar contract the choice is all yours so that's a
01:03:46tough choice you think so he either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to
01:03:51the moon either way benefits why can't i have both you really are a greedy bastard angela i saved you in
01:04:00the pool remember i deserve the contract did you really
01:04:08look who's fashionably late now he didn't save her at the pool wait what what are you talking about
01:04:16i uh i choose the contract i knew it you'll get what's coming to you with this contract my company's
01:04:25earning potential is limitless angela lockhart you humiliated me in front of everyone i will get you
01:04:31one day let me show you one day let me show you something
01:04:46you saved me
01:04:47you saved me i'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life
01:05:00but i promise you i'm gonna make it up to you with the rest of our lives no no i wasn't lying i just
01:05:08couldn't can't remember exactly what happened that day
01:05:18does that mean we both each saved her once what me dr wilson losing at saving people no way
01:05:28you guys one of you do something life-threatening right now you're crazy and actually
01:05:35they've all been doing horrible behind your back what mr sterling had me investigate their
01:05:44company's dealings turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts
01:05:49put it simply they've been stealing from you i can't believe i didn't realize miss lockhart
01:05:56i'm so sorry i should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly no it's not your
01:06:01fault they're just too slick like me to punish them oh god no not that again please max you know what to do
01:06:19the banks have pulled all our funds all business ties have been severed we're bankrupt
01:06:35how did you do that who are you and don't say spider-man
01:06:41i'll tell you who i am i'll tell you who i am
01:06:49i am crypto punk number two what did he say he was that's more bizarre than spider-man
01:06:57you're crypto punk number two well i'm crypto punk number one see you are number one at something
01:07:05the most expensive nft collection in the world forget forbes's list it's all about young money now so
01:07:12how about our date i'm not letting them one-up me on this one let's buy two
01:07:23they forgot to cancel my contract i still have the 100 billion dollar project yes i'm rich
01:07:45i didn't make them all pay soon
01:07:54what mr cooper sir the maple plaza contract requires us to provide 50 of the costs up front
01:08:00otherwise it's a breach of contract and will have to pay for all financial repercussions
01:08:04no i'm bankrupt i'm just a little lockhart you tricked me
01:08:17oh allow me
01:08:21i'm sorry i was late my queen had to get some very important materials
01:08:26for our special date well cheers cheers
01:08:41this looks good
01:08:47did you use my spices i know your ex-in-law has never appreciated you
01:08:52you can have all the money and power in the world and you still can't force a man to love you
01:09:02couldn't even remember our anniversary
01:09:08angel
01:09:10your future with me
01:09:14it's gonna be different come on
01:09:16go upstairs
01:09:37wow
01:09:39devon i can't believe this is what i've been missing out on these past few years
01:09:43just because of some silly mistake
01:09:46angela
01:09:48i've known and loved you for three whole years
01:09:51actually
01:09:53i've also loved you for three years
01:09:56that's right i fell in love with you three years ago too
01:09:59how is all of this possible i didn't meet any of you until recently well actually maybe devon but
01:10:08i've had a crush on you since college you're my motivation to go to business school
01:10:17despite who you were you never judged me for being poor
01:10:23are you trying to get hired at fortune 500 in a suit like that
01:10:28all you do is babble on and on about internet money bitcoin and shit like that
01:10:39are you trying to steal my spot
01:10:43i'll teach you a lesson
01:10:46hey get away from me
01:10:50feisty girl i like her
01:10:58how is he it's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in africa
01:11:09ostriga saltifu can he be cured i actually think i know that poison it sounds really scary
01:11:15but it's cure can actually be found in any developed country household salt
01:11:19i like her
01:11:29there you go
01:11:31what time is it oh shoot i'm late for some practice
01:11:36i like her we have been rivals ever since
01:11:48so that's how i well we all met i barely remember should i never let you go to swim practice that day
01:11:58matthew richards the guy who poisoned me attacked you out of revenge you wouldn't have known
01:12:04i did hear he dropped out and became a loan shark though that makes you feel any better
01:12:08yeah i think that suits him a little better
01:12:10angela your seven days is almost up now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three
01:12:16years who will you pick
01:12:23how couldn't it be angela lockhart is an heiress
01:12:28angela is way better than this dimwit you should get back to the vanderbiltes
01:12:33the vanderbiltes have gone bankrupt
01:12:38the vanderbiltes have gone bankrupt well then get out of here
01:12:44you can't do this to me
01:12:45jared
01:12:49mom it's me
01:12:50what happened
01:12:52jared i have carefully reconsidered angela is way better than this dimwit you should get back with
01:12:58your wife we're bankrupt
01:13:05jared cooper
01:13:08we are here to propose your belongings no one is going to save you now
01:13:19what kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs
01:13:26who will you pick
01:13:28i
01:13:35i brought you fried chicken
01:13:36fried chicken
01:13:38hey not all girls like sushi and caviar
01:13:40yeah he's right i did live in atlanta for three months
01:13:43sucking up last minute at least i don't speak like an ai robot
01:13:48hey stop stop
01:13:51welcome back to the bachelorette i mean the three badasses who want me
01:13:56i mean angela lockhart
01:14:00you know what i mean today our heiress bachelorette will choose
01:14:05which one of our three badasses will she marry
01:14:09will it be shane the doctor
01:14:13cole the general
01:14:15or devon the ceo
01:14:22uh looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide
01:14:26oh the suspense is killing me but when she does she will take this eternal rose made from glass imported from venice and give it to our winner
01:14:37um angela
01:14:41angela
01:14:42oh i uh
01:14:44i uh
01:14:46i need more time to think
01:14:48uh while our bachelorette takes a little time to decide why don't we check in with each of our candidates
01:14:58let's check in with each of our candidates
01:15:01let's start with cole
01:15:02cole
01:15:07there's not much to say
01:15:09who wouldn't want a five-star general who has huge biceps
01:15:14a massive chest
01:15:16who would protect their
01:15:18wife
01:15:20okay thank you
01:15:23uh shane
01:15:26muscles money
01:15:27they'll only get you so far but you need a well-balanced man like me
01:15:32that has more than one way to keep a lady happy if you know what i mean
01:15:39okay i think we do and devon
01:15:44that was quite disgusting
01:15:48i just hope angela's okay i know she's going under a lot of stress right now a lot of choices to make
01:15:54and she's my queen
01:15:57i just really hope she's okay
01:16:00now one more thing
01:16:01what kind of a doctor
01:16:03brings fried chicken to a girl
01:16:06that's a good point
01:16:07it's bad for her heart
01:16:10and then you
01:16:11what you know what they say about military men
01:16:15they beep their lives
01:16:18they beep their lives
01:16:21no
01:16:24stand up
01:16:26hey you guys
01:16:29whoa break it up
01:16:30hey break it up
01:16:37cut to commercial
01:16:38cut to commercial
01:16:48this is the hardest decision i've ever had to make in my entire life
01:17:02who do i choose
01:17:11angela's marrying me
01:17:12you're not stealing her from me
01:17:14oh yeah
01:17:14i may be a doctor but like i said i know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world
01:17:24what don't you have in that code
01:17:26fruit flavored gum
01:17:27i won't let you take angela away from me
01:17:29i'll fight you to the death
01:17:31don't forget about me
01:17:33it's time i reveal my true identity
01:17:39these stupid profile cards don't make any sense they do not they do not help
01:17:43who made these
01:18:03it's time i reveal my true identity
01:18:06i'm actually a part of the x-men
01:18:12and i have the power of telekinesis
01:18:19we may have to work together to take him down
01:18:31we may have to work together to take him down
01:18:32this battle within our heads is the most intense i've ever experienced
01:18:48i may not be able to take them both down if they decide to team up
01:18:51hmm
01:18:52winter mint or cool mint
01:18:54you know i've always really liked your ear
01:19:02really
01:19:04i'm actually pretty self-conscious about it so i i appreciate that
01:19:08hey hey hey and you know cool
01:19:12avar is really like the way you talk
01:19:16really
01:19:16what do you got for me
01:19:22i always really like the way you chew gum
01:19:25yeah yeah it's fresh right yeah
01:19:27it's fresh
01:19:28you know you're actually a really good doctor
01:19:33hey i appreciate it
01:19:34i'll check you out and if you need me to look at you i got you
01:19:36hey me too
01:19:37i'll take care
01:19:37yeah cool
01:19:38angela's been kidnapped
01:19:40angela's been kidnapped
01:19:42it was jared cooper
01:19:45that fucker
01:19:46we have to find her
01:19:47what the hell
01:19:48her ring
01:19:49her dad installed a gps tracking mechanism on her ring just in case
01:19:52well let's go then
01:19:54my oh my fiance
01:19:55my fiance
01:20:02jared
01:20:06what am i doing here
01:20:09you destroyed me
01:20:12i took everything
01:20:15what
01:20:16i have nothing left
01:20:18it's not my fault you're too greedy
01:20:21is it greedy to have sex with my wife
01:20:26i'm not your wife anymore
01:20:27oh yeah i know you wouldn't take me back now not unless i get you pregnant with my child
01:20:32this is illegal
01:20:33you wouldn't want your child to be away from its father you won't have me arrested
01:20:38you will take me back
01:20:39you will be begging me to fuck you soon
01:20:44you will be begging me to fuck you soon
01:20:57hey
01:20:59hey
01:21:01angela come in
01:21:06you're too late
01:21:07i drugged her
01:21:08she'll be dead soon unless
01:21:10not yet
01:21:11have you forgotten who i am
01:21:13he really does have everything he has to coach
01:21:15everything except for fruit
01:21:16fruit flavored gum we get it already just save my boss
01:21:22here you go
01:21:28you're all good now
01:21:29oh thank god
01:21:31but what do we do with that piece of
01:21:33shit
01:21:34what what are you gonna do to me
01:21:36hey stop no
01:21:39enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever
01:21:47glad we didn't actually have that fight
01:21:49turns out he's the most dangerous of them all
01:21:51so who did you pick sweetheart
01:21:59you've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding
01:22:03the prince of bhutan
01:22:05and remember we will kill ourselves if you don't choose
01:22:13welcome back to the finale of the three badasses who want me we're down to the wire
01:22:19literally the wedding day but who's the groom
01:22:34welcome back to the finale of the three badasses who want me but who's the groom
01:22:43uh seems our era still hasn't decided
01:22:48any input from the parents maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice
01:22:53oh this is exciting who should my daughter pick
01:22:58let me think
01:23:02i like the doctor he's cute
01:23:06but but the general looks like a strong fellow
01:23:11and we can't forget about devin sterling the one who's loved her the longest isn't that right devin
01:23:15you are all three very fine gentlemen
01:23:29and i'm really grateful for all of your love
01:23:33but this was a really hard decision and
01:23:36i decided to devise one last challenge
01:23:42and i decided to devise one last challenge
01:23:50i'm just kidding i'm just as sick of this as you guys are
01:23:52each of our candidates have saved our main character i mean bachelorette once they've all proven their
01:24:04undying love so who gets to unlock angela lockhart's heart literally
01:24:10could it be the sexy and protective general with a temper mr cole eisenhower
01:24:23or the fun wicked-minded but kind of weird dr shane wilson
01:24:30and last but not least could it be the richest man of them all the man angela would have married a long time ago mr devin sterling
01:24:45gentlemen
01:24:47it's been a pleasure getting to know you
01:24:49as may the best man win
01:24:52may the best man win
01:24:53may the best man win
01:24:55drumroll please
01:25:10seriously ricky
01:25:18i choose
01:25:23i need a powerful strong man and i really feel like you can protect me
01:25:35who could resist those guns
01:25:39could they interest you in an nfd ellen
01:25:42you like full body choco
01:25:43shane it's you i'm lovesick for you you like that minty flavor don't you
01:26:05it's that tongue action ladies and gents
01:26:07be my new queen
01:26:25it's always been you
01:26:34i'll always love you
01:26:37let's give it up for those nine inches everybody
01:26:42would you like a full body checkup have you seen my murderer weapons
01:26:45i need fruit flavored gum for you
Recommended
1:26:56
|
Up next
1:27:16
1:26:56
1:54:12
1:26:55
1:02:47
1:31:15
1:37:12
1:31:40
1:03:09
1:27:06
2:37:50
1:22:22
2:09:49
1:25:14
1:35:54
1:57:16
1:01:10
1:39:46
1:48:09
1:52:50