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00:00:00Difficult to understand an actor's life because it's so random and haphazard.
00:00:04But now everything's changed because now I have a daughter.
00:00:07So now it's like there's a new girlfriend in the family.
00:00:11An actor, a producer, an entrepreneur, an environmentalist, Alia Bhatt.
00:00:17You were saying this is the first in-depth conversation you've done in over two years.
00:00:22Why is that and why now?
00:00:24What did little Alia want to be when she grew up?
00:00:26I was fascinated by the television.
00:00:28I loved dreaming, whether it was in my classroom, whether it was in front of the television.
00:00:34When I started acting and, well, you know, your friends are your life.
00:00:37I started working at the age of 17.
00:00:38And when you're newly, you know, pursuing your career, sometimes you start taking your friends for granted.
00:00:45As humans, we judge ourselves so much.
00:00:47But there's probably no role that we judge ourselves in as much as being a parent.
00:00:52How do you win?
00:00:52You don't.
00:00:53We're actually all giant babies through our lives, at least for our parents.
00:00:58Like, no matter how old we become, we're still babies.
00:01:00That's what they see.
00:01:01I see that now when every time I would travel, my mom would say, okay, be careful before you cross the road.
00:01:06What's a role that you played that you see yourself in that most felt like you?
00:01:11The number one health and wellness podcast.
00:01:17Jay Shetty.
00:01:18Jay Shetty.
00:01:19He won.
00:01:19The only.
00:01:20Jay Shetty.
00:01:23Alia Bhatt, it is such an honor.
00:01:26I'm so grateful that I get to do this with you.
00:01:28Genuinely so thankful to you.
00:01:30You are an icon.
00:01:31You are phenomenal talent.
00:01:34An unbelievable actress.
00:01:36I feel the roles you choose are out of this world.
00:01:40I'm a huge, huge, huge fan.
00:01:42And I can't wait to dive in to learn more about the person behind all these amazing roles.
00:01:47So thank you for being here on On Purpose.
00:01:49Thank you for having me.
00:01:50Yeah.
00:01:51We first met, I think it was, we met a couple of hours before the Met Gala.
00:01:55Yeah.
00:01:55Which I can't imagine how kind that was of you, but how stressful it was for you.
00:01:59Can you just walk me through what that was like?
00:02:02I think we'd been in touch on Instagram for a while.
00:02:05And you very kindly said, if you're in town, I'd love to meet, etc.
00:02:09And I said, okay, let me try and work it out.
00:02:11Because I was literally in town for two days.
00:02:14But I also realized one thing in that moment is I've become very comfortable with just like
00:02:19going about moments and like special like events or shoots and without really
00:02:25having much conversation with people who I don't know.
00:02:29You know, essentially, we don't really know each other.
00:02:31So I've become a bit comfortable just talking to people that I'm comfortable with.
00:02:36That I know, my team, you know, my family, my friends, my loved ones.
00:02:40So I literally took it as a, oh, it'll be fun.
00:02:44You know, a new experience.
00:02:46I was not on mommy duty at that time.
00:02:48You were missing it.
00:02:49Yeah, I was missing her a lot, of course, all the time.
00:02:52So I had the time.
00:02:54And I just thought it would be fun to have breakfast with somebody and just get to know
00:02:58them a little bit, you know, apart from the fact that both of us are somehow in the media
00:03:04industry, right?
00:03:06Talking to people and getting to know each other is something that just humans do, which
00:03:11I've not been doing much of, very frankly.
00:03:13So that's the reason I was like, okay, even though it's a bit stressful right now, and I have to get into hair and makeup right now for the next four hours, I will still go ahead and do this because it'll be a new experience.
00:03:26I love that mentality.
00:03:27I think it's such a great mindset.
00:03:28And I remember when I first moved to LA, Brian Grazer, who's a legendary Hollywood producer
00:03:34and creator, he does this thing that he calls curious conversations.
00:03:38And so once a month or whatever it is, he randomly picks someone that he finds interesting and he invites them over to his home to just hang out with.
00:03:46And it's his ability to just be able to have a random conversation, have a random interaction that may or may not lead to something professional.
00:03:54Sometimes it doesn't go anywhere.
00:03:55Exactly.
00:03:56Like there's no agenda behind it.
00:03:58It's just a conversation, which you'd land up.
00:04:01That's so interesting, actually.
00:04:02I don't really go for any parties as such.
00:04:05And even if I go, it's usually just like show face and like, you know, be there for a couple of minutes and leave.
00:04:10I like to hang out with my close friends and we sit and we talk.
00:04:16And that also doesn't happen very often.
00:04:18So literally, I was saying this to, I think, a friend of mine the other day, I've forgotten what it is to have a conversation and just ask people questions and have them ask me questions and just exchange and share.
00:04:33I've always said this before.
00:04:34I'm not good with small talk.
00:04:36And the reason I'm not good with small talk is because I know it's just small and it's specifically for that moment.
00:04:41So I can't really indulge in small talk very well.
00:04:44But conversation I actually can do and I used to do very well.
00:04:48But some things happened in the last couple of years.
00:04:51I'm not sure.
00:04:52I don't know whether it was COVID also in the middle that just sort of isolated all of us into our own cocoons.
00:04:58And then life takes over.
00:05:01I, you know, became a mom.
00:05:02All my energies kind of focused there.
00:05:05I felt like I was retracting a lot.
00:05:08Generally, even like, you know, conversation wise.
00:05:12I also have this thing where I take trips within, you know, a conversation like I have.
00:05:18Like, I take a flight and I come back.
00:05:21But just getting to know people is always such a, it's a different, you know, facet to life and to your day.
00:05:29Yeah.
00:05:30It almost requires like a different skill set.
00:05:32It does.
00:05:32A different part of your brain.
00:05:33A different part of your mind.
00:05:35And if you get out of practice, it can feel really hard to do that.
00:05:38How will I know if you, oh, sorry, go on.
00:05:39How do you know if I've taken a flight?
00:05:40How will I know that you've taken a flight?
00:05:42I think you'd know.
00:05:43Okay.
00:05:43You'd know.
00:05:44Okay.
00:05:45You'll just see it on my face.
00:05:47Yeah.
00:05:47You know, I also feel like a lot of what I've learned in life is through conversation.
00:05:52You know, oh, I, one person said this to me or I, you know, the other guy was saying this to that guy and I picked this up.
00:05:58I'll pick up more from what I hear through people and our conversations than I do from, of course, from a book and stuff.
00:06:06But I think conversation sticks for me more than, than the other things.
00:06:12Yeah.
00:06:12So I want to have more, more conversations and more things can stick.
00:06:16Yeah.
00:06:17Well, you were saying this is the first in-depth conversation you've done in over two years.
00:06:22Yeah.
00:06:23Why is that?
00:06:23And why now?
00:06:24In 2022, I remember I had a very fulfilling year, as in it was very beautifully chaotic.
00:06:33There was a lot going on.
00:06:35Many film releases, professionally one thing, but personally, I got married.
00:06:39I had a baby.
00:06:41It was a full year.
00:06:43I think that was the last time I promoted two films.
00:06:46I remember in 2022, Gangu Bai.
00:06:50And then.
00:06:50One of my favorites.
00:06:52And then Darlings after that.
00:06:54Amazing also.
00:06:55But those conversations were very, very kind of, you know, specific to film conversation.
00:07:01I think I overspoke that year.
00:07:03I just felt like I just have spoken so much.
00:07:05I don't have anything more to say professionally.
00:07:08There never came an opportunity where I wanted to, or there was like somebody approached me to just sit down and have a conversation about life.
00:07:16Nothing to do with movies or whatever.
00:07:19So, it just didn't happen.
00:07:21But I did stay away from doing interviews in 2023, only because I genuinely didn't have anything new to say professionally.
00:07:29Like, okay, a film is coming out.
00:07:31Watch it.
00:07:31There's nothing, nothing to say.
00:07:33In fact, a lot of people even said, you know, what's, why have you like shut us out?
00:07:36And I said, I'm not shut anybody out.
00:07:37I just don't have anything new to say.
00:07:39Once I feel like I have something more to say vis-a-vis movies or films, I'll, you know, maybe I'll take up an interview or something.
00:07:48Actually, just talking about life, it's not come my way.
00:07:51Yeah.
00:07:52Well, thank you for trusting us.
00:07:53Thanks for doing this.
00:07:54I want to rewind back because I love learning about how who we were in childhood affects who we are today.
00:08:00I think, and now that you're a mother too, I'm sure you can see it.
00:08:03Even though it's very early days, just how our early experiences create such impressions on who we become, what we're attracted to.
00:08:11And I wonder, what did little Alia want to be or who did she want to be when she grew up?
00:08:16I was fascinated by the television.
00:08:19That's something that I remember very clearly when I was growing up.
00:08:23In fact, my mom and I speak about it right now because she said, my God, was I a horrible mother?
00:08:27Because right now I'm so conscious of my daughter's screen time, not like she has any major screen time at all.
00:08:34She's not even, you know, looked at the iPad.
00:08:36But like, even if she's watching a song on the television and stuff, I'm like, oh, you know, we should limit the time.
00:08:41And my mother's like, was I a horrible mother?
00:08:43Because we just let you be in front of the TV because, you know, like that's what seemed normal at that time.
00:08:51So I was like, no, you weren't horrible.
00:08:52It was a new phenomenon at that time, perhaps.
00:08:55So, but I'm grateful that she didn't stop me from being in front of the television because a lot of my dreaming and imagining and sort of getting lost in the world started from there.
00:09:09So I love dreaming, you know, and that's my most fondest memory growing up, whether it was in my classroom, whether it was in front of the television, whether it was like on my way to school, on my way to something.
00:09:25Just getting lost in my own thoughts, imagining being in front of the camera one day, not like I really knew the intricacies of being an actor or, you know, the layers behind cinema and the shaping of cinema.
00:09:41In fact, one thing I say very candidly is that my cinematic knowledge is not as strong.
00:09:49You know, I don't have not seen every movie in the book.
00:09:53I don't know every director.
00:09:54I don't know all tech.
00:09:56I'm very popcorn like with my entertainment, like, oh, good movie.
00:10:00Let's watch it.
00:10:00Let's enjoy it.
00:10:01You know, I do have specific actors that I'm very fond of, but I don't have all the answers.
00:10:07If you talk about like, yes to your actors and, you know, filmmakers or musicians or anything like that.
00:10:13I don't have all the answers.
00:10:15And growing up also, it's not like I was bookish about it.
00:10:19I didn't study it.
00:10:19I just experienced it through my imagination and like just enthusiasm to be entertained.
00:10:26So that was a lot of my childhood and of course, memories with my friends and that's a very big part of who I am.
00:10:37Endlessly laughing with my friends, doing random things.
00:10:42Till now, we laugh about the same things that we laughed about, you know, 15 years ago.
00:10:48So that's really basically what my childhood was all about.
00:10:52You can't change the person's grain, you know.
00:10:54So my grain is to just like enjoy what I call like maza.
00:10:58I just want to have fun.
00:10:59I grew up watching Govinda and Karishma Kapoor dance.
00:11:03So I remember that as a very strong memory in my brain is that they kept dancing in different spots.
00:11:09Sometimes in a garden, sometimes on the road, sometimes on, you know, in the Swiss Alps.
00:11:13Sometimes they kept changing their clothes.
00:11:15So I was like, why is anybody stopping them from changing their clothes?
00:11:18Like, you know, and why is anybody stopping them from stopping the traffic and dancing on the road?
00:11:23I didn't really put two and two together and understand that this is a film, it's being shot, there's a crew.
00:11:27I was also really little.
00:11:28I think I was like three or four.
00:11:30But I remember this question mark.
00:11:33Like, what's happening behind that screen?
00:11:36What's happening there?
00:11:37It's fascinating.
00:11:38And that's what really got me very attracted to that being my career in life.
00:11:46Yeah.
00:11:46And then I think about it, I'm pretty sure subconsciously, you know, my father's a filmmaker and my mother is an actor, done theater.
00:11:54I'm pretty sure I just was hearing a lot of that conversation in the house.
00:11:59And that must have gotten into my conscience somehow.
00:12:03And that must have become a focus, like interest point, naturally.
00:12:07Yeah.
00:12:08But this connection that I formed with the television, just me and the television happened very, like one on one.
00:12:14Yeah.
00:12:14I love that.
00:12:15Yeah.
00:12:15My mom told me that when I was a kid, all I do is watch Mene Piyarkiya over and over again.
00:12:20Like that was the movie for some reason.
00:12:22I have no idea why.
00:12:24But like that was the movie that I grew up on.
00:12:26I watched Judai.
00:12:27Oh, yeah.
00:12:28Okay.
00:12:29Yeah.
00:12:29Again and again and again.
00:12:31Yeah.
00:12:31And it's so weird, right?
00:12:32My mom's always liked to be like, that's what you used to watch.
00:12:34And now I probably watched the movie when I was a bit older and I was like, it's good.
00:12:38But I don't know why I watched it that many times.
00:12:41And I was probably that young age as well.
00:12:43And it's amazing how there's lasting impressions from that.
00:12:46The most important moments in my life, you just want these people around you.
00:12:51You don't want many people around you.
00:12:53You just want your really close friends around you and your family around you.
00:12:58It's definitely ever evolving, the feeling of motherhood.
00:13:02When you speak about surprises, there are multiple surprises on a daily basis.
00:13:07Would you say that you're always a confident kid and teenager?
00:13:11Or did that take time to build?
00:13:13I was pretty confident.
00:13:14I don't think I had confidence issues.
00:13:16I was very happy on my own.
00:13:19You know, when you're in school, sometimes you find the need to be like, hang out in groups.
00:13:24Although I had a very healthy group, my friends would always make fun of me and say, why are you always walking alone?
00:13:30You always end up walking alone with a frown on your face because my resting face is a frown.
00:13:34Right.
00:13:35So a lot of the times people think I'm upset about life.
00:13:37Actually, I'm not upset about life.
00:13:39I'm just living life because my resting face is a frown.
00:13:42So I'm on my phone doing something and they're like, what happened?
00:13:47Did something happen?
00:13:48I'm like, no, everything's fine.
00:13:49But my face is like this.
00:13:52So that's my resting face.
00:13:54So I was very comfortable being on my own, doing my own thing as I am now.
00:14:00And I think that's also a second child thing is what from what I understand is because you're obsessive about the first child and the second child just grows up, you know,
00:14:10because you're like, I can't do it all over again the same way.
00:14:13At least the parent is like that.
00:14:14I don't know that that's what I've understood and I've heard.
00:14:17And I think a lot of that rubbed off on me because I know my sister and I respond to situations very differently.
00:14:23And I'm always way more, let it be, who cares, you know.
00:14:28Yeah, so about things.
00:14:30And she's, but no, but why?
00:14:31But, you know, and all of that.
00:14:32Yeah, it's an interesting one how people can see being alone as being distant when, like you're saying, it's actually.
00:14:43I mean, that does happen sometimes that people do, might feel that because I'm a bit of like, I'm happy being on my own, that there is some like distance or there's a feeling of not wanting to engage.
00:14:56I don't think I don't want to engage.
00:14:59It's just like I'm very comfortable, like staying silent as well.
00:15:05Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:15:05You know, and that's what would happen in school.
00:15:07It's not like I would not want to hang out with my friends, but I was okay also just walking by myself.
00:15:11I didn't need to hold somebody's hand and walk.
00:15:13And I think that said a lot about just my dreamer personality, what I was talking about earlier.
00:15:18Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:15:18It gives me the space to sort of float a bit.
00:15:21And you were talking about friendship, which I think is such an important part of our lives, and it seems to be such an important part of yours.
00:15:27How have your, are those friends that you had then?
00:15:30I assume they're the same friends you have now.
00:15:31They're people that you've kind of grown up with.
00:15:34Yeah, the exact same friends.
00:15:35What's their life look like?
00:15:37Like, are they all in the industry too?
00:15:38Are they doing different things?
00:15:39So most of them aren't.
00:15:41Just my best friend, Kanchi, Akansha, she's also an actor.
00:15:46We all have, like, live in different parts of the world.
00:15:51Like, four of us live in Mumbai.
00:15:54One of my best friends, she lives in New York.
00:15:56The other lives in Toronto.
00:15:57One lives in London.
00:15:58One lives in Singapore.
00:15:59We're a group of nine girls.
00:16:01And honestly, the reason I have to give them a lot of credit, because the reason where I can still say they're my best friends and we're so close is because of the patience that they've given me.
00:16:12You know, my journey as an actor started very early.
00:16:16I started working at the age of 17.
00:16:18And when you're newly, you know, pursuing your career, your focus becomes your career.
00:16:23And even though I always made it a point to hang out with my friends, sometimes you start taking your friends for granted.
00:16:31And that naturally did happen.
00:16:33And of course, the great thing is the same things that we used to fight about 10 years ago is the same thing that we possibly fight about today.
00:16:39So, what's lovely is nothing's changed.
00:16:44But what's also lovely is that there's still something to fight for, you know.
00:16:49And I do give them a lot of credit for that.
00:16:53For just being patient with me, you know.
00:16:56Showing up, even though many times I can't show up because I'm working or I'm here or I'm there.
00:17:01You know, making excuses for me when I'm unable to be at a particular, you know, getaway or a party or a dinner.
00:17:11But I do my bit to, you know, reconcile and, you know, make up for it.
00:17:17But they really like my family.
00:17:20And that's something that's very clear.
00:17:23That when you make friends that stay with you for so long, they are your family.
00:17:28And a lot of people told me that, you know, actors don't really have friends.
00:17:33I don't know.
00:17:33People said that.
00:17:33Yeah.
00:17:34So, but why?
00:17:35This is in the beginning when I started acting.
00:17:38And, you know, your friends are your life.
00:17:39But it usually doesn't happen because you land up leading such isolated lives and you're so busy.
00:17:46It's very difficult to hold on to the earlier friendships.
00:17:50Also, it's difficult to understand an actor's life or somebody who's in the industry of their life because it's so random and haphazard.
00:17:57So, props to them for really like, yeah.
00:18:01They've really, and they've made an effort to even understand my work.
00:18:06But now everything's changed because now I have a daughter.
00:18:09You know, so now it's like there's a new girlfriend in the family.
00:18:14And now it's all about like, they don't even want to talk to me.
00:18:17They just want to talk to her.
00:18:19I was like FaceTiming my friend yesterday who was in New York.
00:18:21And we were FaceTiming and Raha was there, my daughter, and her foot was in my face.
00:18:26And I was trying to talk about something very serious.
00:18:28And she's like, I'm sorry, I just can't focus because I'm only looking at Raha's foot.
00:18:31I mean, she's in your face.
00:18:33I love that.
00:18:34I love that.
00:18:34I want to jump, I want to talk about Raha in a second.
00:18:37But when you're talking about your friends,
00:18:39I don't have an actor's life, but my life is also on a plane, traveling, moving around.
00:18:44And I speak to my best friend who was my best man at my wedding, probably three times a week.
00:18:50And I completely agree with you.
00:18:52It's all because of him.
00:18:53Because when I call him, he'll make time.
00:18:56He'll shift his schedule.
00:18:57He'll be available to figure out a way.
00:19:00And because of that, it allows me and us to maintain this friendship.
00:19:05When, you know, I left living in London eight years ago, and we've been able to, with all our time zone issues and everything else, maintain this friendship that we've had for 20 years now.
00:19:15And I'm so grateful to him because you're so right that if individuals like that, and again, we do our own part and make up for it.
00:19:24And now I'm flying to Dubai to go and see him because he now moved to Dubai.
00:19:28And so I'm making sure that I go and take out a few days to just catch up with him.
00:19:32Yeah, like when I met you in New York for breakfast, the day before that, I spent the whole day with my friend Meghna, who's my New York friend.
00:19:40So the two days that I was there, I made sure that I met her on the one whole day that I was there.
00:19:46And it's like, you do your best, but I know in my heart that they're doing better.
00:19:52And I'm very grateful to them for that.
00:19:55And whenever it feels like, you know, because it's life's give and take, right?
00:20:01Whenever it feels like one's taking too much, and the other's giving too much, you know, we find a way to balance it out.
00:20:07It is something that really grounds me.
00:20:10And I remember like at the most important moments in my life, you just want these people around you.
00:20:17You don't want many people around you.
00:20:19You just want your really close friends around you and your family around you.
00:20:23Yeah, you're so right.
00:20:25What was it like with your wedding, with having them there?
00:20:28Was that like a special experience?
00:20:30Yeah, we got married at home, at our house, where we were living together and are still living currently.
00:20:37And yeah, it was like 40 people.
00:20:39And my girlfriends were like nine out of the 40 people, and they're plus ones.
00:20:45And it was amazing.
00:20:46And it's one of the fondest memories that I've had.
00:20:50But like, I remember even when I was, you know, in hospital, like just I'd give after I'd given birth and everything, like I asked my sister, you know, have you told the girls, you know, have you informed them?
00:21:01It's the first it comes to my mind, like these things, they're sort of embedded in me in my body.
00:21:08And even though it's not every day, even though it's not every week that we hang out and meet or speak as often, they're a part of my life in a very deep way.
00:21:20Now, I'm not surprised that any of your friends want to ignore you and talk to Raha because she's so adorable.
00:21:26I was just telling you, I saw this video of you.
00:21:28I think you and Ranbir and her were traveling.
00:21:30And the paps were like waving at her and said hi.
00:21:33And then she waved back and said hi.
00:21:35And it was the most adorable thing.
00:21:37I sent it to my wife's trailer.
00:21:38I was like, look how cute she is.
00:21:39Like, she's adorable.
00:21:40And how has motherhood been for you so far?
00:21:43I remember, like you said, in New York, you were missing her.
00:21:45Yeah.
00:21:46Like, I remember you talked about her so much.
00:21:48Like, how has it been for you?
00:21:49What has been a surprise?
00:21:52And what has been something that you expected it to be that way?
00:21:55I don't think you can prepare yourself for what you're about to feel.
00:22:02To be very honest, my mother said this to me earlier before I gave birth.
00:22:06She said, you know, I said, do you remember something, something?
00:22:08And she said, no, I don't remember.
00:22:09I said, why don't you remember anything?
00:22:10She said, because you'd be surprised you forget.
00:22:12You forget what happens before.
00:22:14I've forgotten a lot of what it was pre-motherhood in terms of my feeling or my way of life or the way my brain functioned at that time.
00:22:25My days are so full now.
00:22:27In fact, I wonder what I was doing with my time earlier.
00:22:30Even if I was not working, what was I doing in the day?
00:22:34Because now it's a full day.
00:22:37Wake up at 7 o'clock in the morning and, you know, she's asleep by 8.39.
00:22:41And I'm asleep soon after by 10.30.
00:22:45From 7 to 10.30, it's like you're on a treadmill, you know.
00:22:48It's just like you're running.
00:22:50When you speak about surprises, there are multiple surprises on a daily basis currently because she's a toddler.
00:22:56She's a two-year-old, right?
00:22:57Like now, she's just turned two.
00:23:00So now she's really bubbling.
00:23:02There's a lot of surprises every day.
00:23:05It's definitely ever-evolving, the feeling of motherhood.
00:23:09But I think one thing I can say for sure, and it is a good thing, but sometimes it can also be a bad thing.
00:23:17Bad is the wrong word, but like it can also be something that people have to put up with.
00:23:22It's that I think I've just, of course, become very incessantly protective ever since she was born.
00:23:28So I remember the months, earlier months after she was born, it was bliss for me.
00:23:37I really enjoyed the instant sort of survival, you know, like this being needs me to survive at this moment.
00:23:47You know, so very survival, sort of nurturing feeling, even though there were sleepless nights, etc.
00:23:55And of course, I have to acknowledge the fact that I have, I'm hugely privileged in that aspect that I have help and I have a great support system and all of that.
00:24:04But that instant sort of bonding period, I deeply enjoyed it, but I was also filled with so much worry.
00:24:12And that's something that I have to talk about very openly.
00:24:15And that's a very normal feeling is what I understand for mothers to feel, especially new mothers to feel.
00:24:22But what I also learned with time is that the worry doesn't go away.
00:24:25It just changes form and depending on your personality as to how anxious your mind is or whether, you know, you're able to deal with certain situations better, it might move forward differently.
00:24:39But it's a beautiful combination of feeling extreme love with extreme worry.
00:24:47There's a lot of worry and by worrying, I mean, I don't feel like I'm stressed out or I'm like stressing her out.
00:24:54I think I become pretty childlike when I'm with her.
00:24:57One thing I'm pretty mindful about is to really enjoy her childhood, you know, a lot of parents who are like who have kids 18 year olds, 20 year olds keep telling me enjoy this time, enjoy this time.
00:25:10In fact, in New York, I met a woman in an elevator who was there to drop her son off to college.
00:25:15And I was holding Raha in my hand who was not when I was there for the Met, right after.
00:25:21I was holding Raha in my hand and, you know, Raha was fidgeting with her and she said to me, she said, just enjoy this time.
00:25:28I'm dropping my son off to college and time just flies.
00:25:31And I could see the pain in her eyes.
00:25:33So I really take that advice very seriously about enjoying the time.
00:25:37So I really try and be very present with Raha, which is something that I don't do very often in my other, you know, moments in life.
00:25:44I'm always like, people always telling me, you've left the building, you've reached home.
00:25:49I'm always like 10 steps ahead.
00:25:50But with her, I try to be a lot like in the present and in the moment.
00:25:56And it happens more naturally because I want to enjoy every second.
00:26:00But there is a sense of like, you know, I'm always like my heart is just way wide open.
00:26:07And I'm just like always worried about something or the other vis-a-vis her.
00:26:12But I'm, I'm guessing that's something that I'm just going to have to like live with for the rest of my life.
00:26:18What we don't realize is our parents are also just, what we were discussing, giant babies.
00:26:23You're so used to like thinking about your life like this, like this is my moment and my this.
00:26:27And when you just cut, you think about it on a larger scale, all the worry just disappears.
00:26:33So when I look at the struggle and the suffering that there is in the world, it really makes me count my blessings and be so grateful for everything that we have in our lives.
00:26:46Because it's hard for people in the world.
00:26:51What's it been like to see when we become a dad and a girl dad especially?
00:26:55He's amazing.
00:26:57He's very creative when it comes to entertaining her.
00:27:02She entertains him as well.
00:27:04Like they both have a very special friendship, I would say.
00:27:10Their bond is not that you'd feel like they're two friends.
00:27:14Like either two adults or two toddlers.
00:27:18You know, different moments in life.
00:27:21And he's like literally for it.
00:27:26When he looks at Raha, it's like stars in his eyes.
00:27:29There's that.
00:27:30And of course, for any parent, but I mean, I see it because I've known Ranbir Pri and I know him now.
00:27:36I see the difference.
00:27:37I see the difference in the way he is with people.
00:27:43You know, as a father, he's just so sort of full.
00:27:48You know, it's not like he was ever edgy or ever.
00:27:51He always had a very calm demeanor or anything.
00:27:54But there's a fullness which I've experienced firsthand and that I see on a daily basis.
00:28:02And it's actually really sweet and special to, you know, watch their conversations.
00:28:07And very often I'm just like sneakily, you know, videotaping a lot of their random moments.
00:28:14And they don't even know I'm doing it.
00:28:15Eventually, I guess one of them looks at the camera and then I put it off.
00:28:19But it's just the beginning.
00:28:21But the beginning is just so unique and special, at least from where I'm sitting and from what I've seen.
00:28:27And just to watch your partner also manifest love in that way is very interesting.
00:28:32Go on, what do you mean?
00:28:34I mean, we have love for each other, right?
00:28:36I have love for Ranbir.
00:28:36Ranbir has love for me.
00:28:37I have love for Raha.
00:28:39Raha has love for me and Ranbir and Ranbir has love for Raha.
00:28:43So you see different moments of love transpire differently in one house, under one roof.
00:28:50And it wasn't always like this, right?
00:28:52Like Raha has come into our life now.
00:28:54So you know the before and the after, although I don't remember much of it, as I mentioned earlier.
00:28:59But you know moments and you know feelings and you know how every, like we've watched sunsets together.
00:29:05But now when we're watching the sunset with her, it's a different feeling, you know?
00:29:10It's a very beautiful feeling.
00:29:12It's very fulfilling.
00:29:14Yeah, so sweet.
00:29:15You're making me feel like I've got so much to look forward to.
00:29:17So I'm like, yeah.
00:29:19No, I'm like, I always tell Radhi, I'm like, I want to be a girl dad so bad.
00:29:23Oh, yeah.
00:29:24And he really wanted to be a girl dad.
00:29:26Yeah, he really did.
00:29:28I'm doing this thing where I send Raha emails.
00:29:31I've been doing it since she's born, every month.
00:29:33And like just like an amalgamation of like photos and videos and what happened and just thoughts and feelings.
00:29:41Wow, that's so cool.
00:29:42Yeah, somebody said that somebody, this was somebody.
00:29:45So I was like, it's a great idea because it's like a live memory book.
00:29:49You know, I don't have the discipline and the energy to actually fill out a physical memory book.
00:29:54So I thought this is like a digital way of doing it.
00:29:57It's easier to search.
00:29:58And it's nice like when maybe she's 15, you know, I'd give this to her and say, listen, this is all the memories that we collected for you over the years and go ahead and have some fun.
00:30:11What a special gift.
00:30:12What kind of things are we putting there right now?
00:30:14Just like photos, you know, videos, thoughts, mainly just visuals of her with either like us, with either one of us or her grandparents or, you know, her aunt or uncles and stuff like that.
00:30:29And just random moments, you know, and like a little note that you did this today.
00:30:33And, you know, we had such a lovely trip here and something happened and just sharing whatever I can.
00:30:39It's like within the moments, whatever comes out at that time.
00:30:42But yeah, so when I'm sneakily recording the two of them, it's and I sometimes when I review it and it's it's really very heartwarming to watch because you know that this is like something very special is just cooking.
00:30:57Like I remember in New York, we were speaking about this.
00:31:01And I remember my mom sent me a photo of like a baby walking down the street with like many bags.
00:31:08Like it was actually a random like a Pinterest image or something.
00:31:12And I discussed this with you.
00:31:14And we said, we actually both agreed that we're actually all giant babies through through our lives, at least for our parents, like no matter how old we become, we're still babies.
00:31:24You know, that's what they see.
00:31:26That's what they see.
00:31:27And I see that now, you know, I see that now when every time I would travel, my mom would say, okay, be careful before you cross the road, you know, take care of your arms and legs.
00:31:36Yeah, I'm like, what do you say?
00:31:38What do you may take care of your arms and legs?
00:31:41But I understand that now.
00:31:43Yeah, yeah.
00:31:43I mean, I'm not a parent, but everything you're saying to me, even when I think about it for a second, I think I'd be exactly the same.
00:31:51I'm like that with my friend's kids.
00:31:53Like if my friend's children are over, and I remember my friends, I can't remember what they were doing, something called adventure parenting or something.
00:31:59I can't remember those.
00:32:00One of these parenting techniques.
00:32:02So we're sitting at one end of a living room.
00:32:04The kid is at the other end of the living room.
00:32:06And she's like, just learned to walk, but she's like, putting her hands through candles like this.
00:32:11And so I'm about to run over and like, take their kid away from the candle.
00:32:14And they're like, no, no, no, she'll learn.
00:32:16And that was their parenting technique.
00:32:18And my heart was like, I was, and it's not even my child, but I'm feeling so much.
00:32:23And, you know, I'm constantly like, whenever I see kids running around, again, friends, kids in my home or whatever, I'm like looking for their heads to not bump against the table.
00:32:30Like, I find myself even being that way now.
00:32:33So I can't imagine when it's your own child.
00:32:35You know, one thing is worry for the physical, physical danger or within the moment.
00:32:41But the other worry is also worry whether you're doing your parenting bit right.
00:32:48Worry whether you're giving them, you know, the right tools to go with.
00:32:52And she's so small right now.
00:32:54She's two.
00:32:54So there's no need for me to be thinking about all of this.
00:32:56But every moment is a learning, right?
00:32:59If I'm trying to impart some sort of life knowledge to her in a specific moment, say she's having dealing with an emotion and I need to help her deal with it.
00:33:09Because basically what, from what I've understood is that this is where they really start like pushing their boundaries and understanding the world.
00:33:19And instead of confining them to specific emotions that this is the way you're supposed to be and this is the way you're not supposed to be.
00:33:26You help them deal with every emotion, you know, because happiness is easy to deal with.
00:33:32But the other ones are not, right?
00:33:34And it starts, it starts now.
00:33:36It starts very early.
00:33:38So giving her the tools to deal with these emotions.
00:33:41I need to have those tools myself as well, number one.
00:33:46Number two, I think this is where my, you know, cutting, fast forwarding to the future happens is that I know I can't be a perfect parent.
00:33:54And from what I understand is I can just be good enough.
00:33:57But I have to be able to be so present and one with her feeling what she's feeling, asserting certain values and behaviors, but also just letting her be, you know.
00:34:13So there's so many of these permutation combinations that I'm just like constantly toying with.
00:34:17So that's one other worry about like just future and life.
00:34:20And then of course, there's this physical thing.
00:34:22And then is she eating well and she's sleeping well, you know, what's going to happen tomorrow and what's going to happen day after.
00:34:27And I'm also a working mom.
00:34:29Again, I have to acknowledge my privilege.
00:34:31I do have a great support system around her, but the worry is not going to leave, you know, like, oh, if I'm away, is somebody going to say something?
00:34:39Is she going to pick up on something that I would not want her to pick up on?
00:34:43All those things.
00:34:44But, you know, you just take each day as it comes and just move forward.
00:34:49So I guess the reason I'm speaking about it is because it's a very real feeling and it's not something that I've just got figured out since day one.
00:35:00I'm constantly sort of wrapping my head around it on a daily basis.
00:35:05But apart from that, it's joyous.
00:35:07No, I appreciate you being so honest about it because I think the worry point and especially what you raised, this idea that as humans, we judge ourselves so much.
00:35:19But there's probably no role that we judge ourselves in as much as being a parent because you can almost really see how this innocent, beautiful being is taking on so much of your energy, your words, your behavior, the environment.
00:35:35And I think that almost makes us so mindful and thoughtful because with our partners, with our parents, we can kind of be a bit lax and sometimes we can say things we don't mean or whatever.
00:35:46But when you're with a child, it's almost like you realize how precious they are and how those exchanges are.
00:35:52And it's so interesting what you're saying, this idea of self-judgment.
00:35:57And it's fascinating because I've met people who've said, my parents were always around and gosh, it was really, really hard.
00:36:06And then I meet other people who say, my parents were never around and it was really, really hard.
00:36:09And then you hear, my parents forced me to study this and I don't like them for it.
00:36:14And then someone says, my parents forced me to study this and I love them for it.
00:36:18And it's almost like you kind of look at that and you go, well, how do you win?
00:36:21You don't, though. That's the thing because human beings are hard.
00:36:24What we don't realize is our parents are also just, what we were discussing, giant babies, you know.
00:36:31So we're all figuring, I know I'm a mother right now and it's not like I've got it all figured out.
00:36:36And I have, by all figured out, I mean, it's not like, oh, I have all the answers to life, you know, for every particular issue.
00:36:43Most definitely do not.
00:36:45I'm very grateful for the life that we have and the comfort that we enjoy.
00:36:50And I literally, I'm so much more grateful after becoming a mom.
00:36:55It's so surprising how you're, I think what we were talking about, what's surprising.
00:37:00I always found myself to be somebody who had, you know, a decent amount of empathy.
00:37:06But I think the empathetic quotient just truly multiplies once you're a mom because you picture your child in every situation.
00:37:16So when I look at the struggle and the suffering that there is in the world, it really makes me count my blessings and be so grateful for everything that we have in our lives.
00:37:29Because it's hard for people in the world and it's not, I'm always somebody who likes to believe in the good and the positivity.
00:37:41And I'm always trying to put out, oh, there's light at the end of the tunnel and, you know, it's going to rain because the sun can shine.
00:37:49That's my belief. And you only appreciate the sunshine when they're, these are all great quotes for Instagram, but when it's real life and you see the suffering and the struggle that some people have to go through, it's, you really have to be, just take a second and be like, wow, everything's good.
00:38:07You know, just cut to a wide shot and everything is great.
00:38:11In fact, very often what I do, especially when I'm having a bad day at this little balcony at the back of my, my bedroom.
00:38:19And it's like really small, it's more like, like an, like a fire exit or something.
00:38:23And I just go and stand there and I can see a lot of, because in Bombay, a lot of the buildings, especially where I live are like very close together.
00:38:30So this might sound a little creepy, but when, when I go and stand there, I like, like I look, I just have like a wide view of activity in different people's homes.
00:38:42Somebody's walking with some clothes, somebody's watching television, I'm not looking into their bedrooms, but it just gives me a sense of life existing whilst yours is.
00:38:51And it just puts a lot of things into perspective because you're so used to like thinking about your life like this, like this is my moment and my this and that.
00:39:00I mean, you just cut and you think about it on a larger scale, all the worry just disappears.
00:39:07Yeah.
00:39:07You know, and you just, you just, you take a second and you just feel very grateful for where you are in life.
00:39:13Yeah.
00:39:13I could tell how much that was.
00:39:15Yeah.
00:39:15You look on the verge of tears.
00:39:17I mean, that's what I'm saying when I talk about it, because that's how much maybe internal worry I have just as a person for people in the world and also for most, most importantly for my loved ones and for my daughter.
00:39:30But that's how my world has opened up.
00:39:33I think post being a mom, way more aware about the other life that exists as opposed to your own.
00:39:40Have you thought about things you want to do or get involved in to help the communities or people that you're noticing or things like that?
00:39:49I mean, I'd rather do and not talk because sometimes it feels like you're talking to make a point just to see what a great person I am.
00:39:56I think there's definitely on a, I can, I can be a way nicer person on a daily basis and way more helpful, but I do whatever I can do and help however I can help.
00:40:08Whether it's, you know, for people, for animals, whatever I can do.
00:40:12But of course, I think I'm probably just even, not even scratching the surface.
00:40:17There's way, way, way more that I can do on a daily basis.
00:40:20No, I appreciate that.
00:40:21I think, I think all of us can and feel that way.
00:40:24And you're right.
00:40:24It's better to do and not talk.
00:40:26So I appreciate your humility in that way and keeping it that way.
00:40:29I was thinking about this idea, this concept you brought back from our conversation, which shows that you're a good listener and have a great memory.
00:40:36Because the fact that you're recalling our conversation from like, nearly a year ago now, if not two years.
00:40:41Maybe a year ago.
00:40:42A year ago now.
00:40:43Yeah, now two years ago.
00:40:44Yeah, so we're in 2025.
00:40:46Correct, two years ago.
00:40:47Right, it was 2023, no?
00:40:48Or not, maybe 20.
00:40:49Yeah, yeah, 23.
00:40:5123.
00:40:51And so like this big baby.
00:40:5324.
00:40:5324, was it 24?
00:40:54Yeah, maybe it was 24.
00:40:5524.
00:40:55Maybe it was 24.
00:40:56But this big baby idea, what parts of yourself do you think you're still babying or that are still a baby in your own self emotionally?
00:41:05Oh, I think I still experience, okay, speaking just about movies and cinema, because I think when I watch a movie, I experience it like a child would, you know.
00:41:14I'm not measured with my emotions or my responses.
00:41:20In fact, very often, I'm like, I'm watching whoever I'm watching, whether it's, you know, Ranbir or my sister or something.
00:41:25I'm like, what's going to happen now?
00:41:25Why is she doing that?
00:41:27Like, we did not make the movie.
00:41:28We don't know.
00:41:29But I'm like, I'm just so involved in it.
00:41:32And I just need to know.
00:41:33I'm like chatting through it.
00:41:35So I think in that way.
00:41:37So Ranbir is like a silent watcher.
00:41:39Ranbir is, yeah.
00:41:40And he's, he between the two of us is much better, you know, vis-a-vis his cinema knowledge and movies.
00:41:47And he's way more diligent with it.
00:41:50And in fact, a lot of my movie watching experiences is shared with him and because of him.
00:41:57Yeah.
00:41:57But like, I'm like, I'm like, and then he was like, he's like, we'll find out.
00:42:04I don't know.
00:42:05You know, same with my sister.
00:42:07I'm like, why is this happening?
00:42:09And she said, I don't know, Alia.
00:42:10I did not make it.
00:42:13So in that sense, I'm, I'm very physically involved.
00:42:17So I'm not like an adult watching a movie and all.
00:42:19I'm a child.
00:42:20I think still, this would happen to me as a, as, as a child, as a kid a lot is that if I'm like exhausted, tired, I would just cry.
00:42:29You know, I not realize why I'm crying.
00:42:31And I'm like, the thing is horrible.
00:42:34And my mother would be like, darling, are you tired?
00:42:38Do you need, I'm just, everything's a bit hard.
00:42:40So that happens to me when I'm tired.
00:42:42Even now, I'll suddenly like just start weeping about something completely random.
00:42:47And it happened to me a couple of weeks ago, actually.
00:42:50I was with my friends and I just started crying about something not being right.
00:42:53And they're like, are you okay?
00:42:54And they're like, I'm just tired.
00:42:57Like I not had a good night's sleep.
00:42:59So that happens to me a lot.
00:43:01I think also curiosity.
00:43:03I don't think, um, my curiosity has left me.
00:43:06I can see that now as when, like with Raha and stuff, she always wants to know, but why, why doing that?
00:43:11Why is that?
00:43:12Who's that?
00:43:13Who's that person?
00:43:14Like always wants to know everything.
00:43:15I want to know the conversation that's happening across the room between two people that I know, of course.
00:43:21And I'm like watching them speak and, you know, like trying to read what they're, and then like lip read what they're saying to each other.
00:43:30And if I couldn't understand bits of it, then I just asked what happened, what happened, who said what?
00:43:35You know, so the curiosity is still alive.
00:43:37Yeah.
00:43:37Yeah.
00:43:38Radhi does it with people we don't know.
00:43:40We'll be at a restaurant.
00:43:41She'll be like, let's pretend we know what conversation they're having.
00:43:43And let's have it.
00:43:44Oh, I love doing that.
00:43:45She loves doing that.
00:43:46I love doing that.
00:43:46I'm like, just talk to me, man.
00:43:48She's like, she's like, no, no, this is more interesting.
00:43:50Let's do this.
00:43:50I'm like, all right, then.
00:43:52Especially if somebody's having a fight, then you want to overhear even more.
00:43:56Yeah.
00:43:56Yeah.
00:43:56Yeah.
00:43:56She's like, oh, what do you think they're talking about?
00:43:58Let's, let's pretend to have their conversation.
00:44:00I'm like, I don't know what they're talking about.
00:44:02I don't know nothing about them.
00:44:04It's okay.
00:44:04Whatever.
00:44:05Healthy baby.
00:44:05That's all you want.
00:44:06Yeah, of course.
00:44:06Of course.
00:44:07Yeah.
00:44:07That is the number one priority.
00:44:08Yeah.
00:44:09No, that is the number one priority.
00:44:10You're right.
00:44:10A healthy child is, is the most important priority, but there's, there's particular
00:44:14things.
00:44:15And, and Radhi is one of two girls.
00:44:17So she's kind of used, she's like, okay with that.
00:44:20And so, but you had no preference.
00:44:22You were like, kind of like, whatever comes.
00:44:24Yeah.
00:44:24I was like, just health.
00:44:26You know, that time I was just thinking about like health, health, health, everything goes
00:44:29well smoothly.
00:44:31But of course, I think she's really, like I said, even for my girl gang, they were like
00:44:36so excited.
00:44:36We're like, girl strips are now going to be so different.
00:44:40You know, my best friend, one of my best friends is getting married this year.
00:44:43And she's like, are you coming?
00:44:44She's like, yeah.
00:44:44She's like, I don't care if you're coming.
00:44:45I hope Raha's coming.
00:44:47I was like, yeah, Raha's coming.
00:44:48I love that.
00:44:49What, what's, has Raha already watched any of your movies already?
00:44:52No, she's too, she's too small to like watch a full movie.
00:44:55She's watched multiple songs of mine and Ranbir's.
00:45:00And now we've sort of exposed her to other people's songs as well.
00:45:03But she, I think now she's got this feeling that everything is our song.
00:45:06In fact, the other day, we, some song played and I was like, oh, it was like, I think it
00:45:11was a Shah Rukh Khan song from Mohawk Day.
00:45:13And I was like, oh, I was doing some dance step and she's like, mama, your song?
00:45:17So I was like, no, mama, papa's song?
00:45:19So I was like, no, this is Shah Rukh Khan's song.
00:45:22She's like.
00:45:23She was on show.
00:45:24You've played so many powerful women on screen, so many.
00:45:31And I've always admired you for the choices of roles you've played.
00:45:35I think I said that to you when we first met.
00:45:37What's the one you are excited for her to see?
00:45:40Is there one movie that you think I can't wait for her to be able to watch this?
00:45:43And obviously at different ages, she'll be able to watch different ones.
00:45:46I mean, when she's much older, I'd want her to, in her own time, watch the films that
00:45:54really sort of shaped me as an actor and the experiences that I learned a lot from.
00:46:01Like, for example, a film like Highway and a film like Gangubai or a film like Razi.
00:46:09But in fact, I recently realized that I don't have many child.
00:46:14I mean, some of them, but like, very like child-friendly films.
00:46:18Yeah, no, no, definitely.
00:46:19That's why I was saying that at a certain age.
00:46:22Yeah.
00:46:22So in fact, that has made me want to take up a film that is loved by kids or that's like
00:46:31a kid-friendly film.
00:46:33Yeah.
00:46:33It's recently made me want to do that.
00:46:35And I'm now, I'm on the hunt.
00:46:38Yeah, because now you're looking at your filmography and going,
00:46:40because she's going to be 18 years old to watch one.
00:46:42I was like, yeah, she can watch a couple of films.
00:46:44I'm not sure how much she'd want to watch like Gangubai and, you know, Highway at this
00:46:50age or not this age or even when she's four or five or six.
00:46:53I wanted to enjoy films that I like.
00:46:55So I know Brahmastra is a film that kids liked a lot.
00:46:58Like when I meet kids now, they say Brahmastra or they say like Rocky Rani and I like your
00:47:03this song.
00:47:03Kids more, they like songs.
00:47:05Songs, yeah.
00:47:05I remember, I grew up watching songs.
00:47:08I mean, my memory is more so of music and that really leaves a long lasting impressions.
00:47:15That's one thing that I feel very grateful for is that I can sing to my daughter.
00:47:18I mean, I'm glad I have a decent voice because very often, you know, she demands songs after
00:47:26me and I'm just like singing and I'm like, especially when I'm putting her to sleep.
00:47:30So now I'm on the hunt to do like more kid-friendly.
00:47:32Yeah, I love that.
00:47:34I could see you doing a voiceover too of an animation or something like that.
00:47:37Oh yeah, I'd love that.
00:47:38Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:47:38I'd love that.
00:47:39That would be super fun.
00:47:40I could see you do that.
00:47:41What's a role that you played that you see yourself in that most felt like you?
00:47:46Is there a role that you played that feels like you personality-wise?
00:47:50I don't say this.
00:47:52A lot of the people who love me and who know me say this and it's going to sound bizarre,
00:47:58but they say I'm Gangu.
00:48:00No way.
00:48:01Yeah, like they say that that's my alter ego, you know, the personality, the boisterousness,
00:48:07the way she, not her situation, of course, not her circumstances, but the way she, and
00:48:14I think that's also somehow there was like a nice push and pull in playing that part.
00:48:22She was very gangster.
00:48:23She was very, I think that is my alter ego.
00:48:26I don't think that that's the way I am in my real life, but it's, it is definitely the
00:48:31part that I enjoyed depicting the most.
00:48:35In a sort of humorous way, a lot of my friends and people say, you're Gangu, she's Gangu,
00:48:42like, you know, and they say that, but I think there is some truth to that only, I guess,
00:48:47from the essence of the fact that she's a child, but she's got a certain, like...
00:48:52Yeah, she's got some spice.
00:48:54Yes, exactly.
00:48:55And some, like, yeah, some fieriness.
00:48:58And then what's a character role that you played that you'd like to borrow some energy from?
00:49:01So, I think at this particular moment, I need some playful, bubbly energy, which is like
00:49:07sort of superficial, if you call it, or frivolous, or it's just like...
00:49:12Silly.
00:49:13Silly.
00:49:13Yeah.
00:49:14So, I was actually thinking about this the other day, but I feel like I need some of that.
00:49:19Rocky or Rani had a bit of that.
00:49:20Rocky or Rani had that, but she was also a little like a journalist, you know.
00:49:24Maybe I can take it from Rocky's character, not from Rani so much.
00:49:28But there's this character that I played in Humti Sharma Ki Dulhanya.
00:49:32Her name is Kavya.
00:49:33I was actually watching a song of that the other day, and I was like, I don't remember
00:49:37who, you know, that girl was at that time, that feeling.
00:49:43Not like I feel like I'm, like, old or something like that, but there was like a silliness there
00:49:48that I feel that I can do more with, you know.
00:49:51Because I think I was pretty silly.
00:49:53And now I've just become a little bit more in control at most times, which I think I
00:50:01can do with some silliness.
00:50:02Yeah, yeah.
00:50:03I feel like when I met my wife, I was like, I took life very seriously, and she's like
00:50:08just silly and playful all the time.
00:50:10And it's so helpful having that, because otherwise you're so right.
00:50:13You just kind of get stuck in your ways.
00:50:15Yeah, but honestly, you asked character, so I said I named this character, because I
00:50:20was also watching this song the other day.
00:50:21But actually, I have my daughter in front of me, and I get that silliness from her.
00:50:27From her, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:50:28So actually, I just, like I was saying earlier, I just tune into that moment with her.
00:50:34I just need to do it more for me, though.
00:50:36Like, for my vibe, and not just when I'm with her.
00:50:40Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:50:41You know, be more open to a silly joke as well.
00:50:45Yeah.
00:50:46You know, and like, crack a silly joke, if at all.
00:50:49I think I don't do that anymore.
00:50:50Okay.
00:50:51Yeah.
00:50:52It's become a bit, it's become a bit too grown up.
00:50:56Yeah.
00:50:56Are you someone that energizes when you're on your own, or energizes when you're around
00:51:00people?
00:51:01Certain people can really energize me.
00:51:04Yeah.
00:51:05But I think I'm mostly energized on my own.
00:51:07Yeah, yeah.
00:51:07More than a certain number of people, I think, can really drain the energy out.
00:51:13And that does tend to happen.
00:51:14Say if I've gone on a promotional tour for a film, because you're just meeting so many
00:51:20people and you're engaging, by the end of it, I'm just drained.
00:51:23You're just zapped, you know, because you're just constantly engaging so much.
00:51:27And I think I'm also one of those people who is very, you know, I think of there being
00:51:34like this sort of twinkly light in front of me, where I feel like I'm always, I can take
00:51:40people's energy in pretty quickly.
00:51:42I'm not somebody who's just blocked off to everybody's energy.
00:51:44So if somebody's walked into the room, and they're not having a bad day, that'll reach
00:51:47me very quickly.
00:51:48If something has happened, which is like chaotic situation, it's not like I can block
00:51:55it off.
00:51:56Yeah.
00:51:56So I'm very receptive to people's energies.
00:51:59So I can, you know, almost like, it comes right to me.
00:52:05So, which is why I maybe prefer to not engage as much and to stay out of most conversations
00:52:11in order to stay, like speak to just the people that I'm most comfortable with, because I'm familiar
00:52:16with their energy.
00:52:17There's nothing new there.
00:52:19What do you do with the energy when it comes to you and you're sensing?
00:52:22When it's new.
00:52:22Yeah.
00:52:23Oh, it does.
00:52:24I behave very weirdly sometimes.
00:52:26I really do have, I've noticed that about myself later on.
00:52:30I'm like, why did I behave so weird in that moment?
00:52:32And like a friend, like somebody who knows me very well, would be like, I find it strange
00:52:37talking to you at parties sometimes, Alia, because you can behave really strange and say
00:52:40some very strange things because I'm so confused with the different multiple energies.
00:52:44I don't know what to do with them, you know?
00:52:46But what helps is your surround system and the people that are around you, especially
00:52:53the team that I work with.
00:52:54They know me so well that even if I'm having a day like that, that's why it's very important
00:53:01for me when I'm working with a particular team for me to be very comfortable with them.
00:53:06Because if I'm not comfortable with them, all this will add to my daily energy zapping,
00:53:14you know?
00:53:15Again, it seems like I'm talking about all my energy and my things that they might have
00:53:19their own day and I'm very receptive to that as well.
00:53:22And everybody's sensitive to everybody.
00:53:24Here, because I'm talking about myself, I just thought that like, you know, it's important
00:53:28to find a way to go through the day where you do your own thing and you don't demand
00:53:35too much from people.
00:53:36And likewise, vice versa, I don't demand too much from people as well when I'm going
00:53:41about my day.
00:53:41When did your self-care and mental health advocacy work begin?
00:53:45Like, what was it that led you in that direction where you started to prioritize self-care, talk
00:53:51about anxiety, talk about mental health?
00:53:52Like, when did that become important for you and why?
00:53:55I think my sister, she was a huge part of that.
00:53:59I think, and obviously, I'm doing it at a very small level.
00:54:02Whenever I can talk about it through my own lens, I do.
00:54:06Shaheen, my sister, wrote a book.
00:54:08It's called I've Never Been Unhappier.
00:54:10And she's, you know, lived with depression since she was 13 and has built some amazing
00:54:18tools in life to be where she's at today.
00:54:22And she speaks about it beautifully.
00:54:25So something about her honesty inspired me to talk about it, not in a way where you seem
00:54:35like you're complaining about your life, because again, you're not in a position to complain,
00:54:39you have it all.
00:54:40But just to talk about it so that somebody somewhere watching might just resonate with
00:54:45it and feel like, oh, okay, you know, I was having the same day or I have the same feelings.
00:54:56So it's, I'm not alone, you know, everybody feels it.
00:54:59And it's, it's happened very often with me when I've seen some A-list celebrity, Hollywood
00:55:07international, or like even here, speak about something.
00:55:11And I've resonated or connected with that.
00:55:14And I was like, oh, they're feeling it as well.
00:55:16So, you know, it's happened.
00:55:17It happens with all of us.
00:55:19So that's when I think I became more open to talk about having any specific anxiety.
00:55:26And also, I was recently clinically diagnosed with it.
00:55:29So I had a proper backing for me to not just say I'm just having an anxious day.
00:55:35Okay, it's not just that.
00:55:37ADHD and anxiety.
00:55:39ADHD and I actually seeked it out only because I was actually finding it very hard.
00:55:47My body was heating up in social gatherings and I was like physically responding to it.
00:55:53So I was also finding it very hard to focus on certain things and my focus was going in
00:55:57and out.
00:55:58And then I realized that I gave myself a lot of credit for being some, an amazing multitasker.
00:56:03And then I realized that, yeah, I can multitask, but it does take a toll on me.
00:56:08And I need to understand why it's taking a toll on me because I'm forgetting the most
00:56:13random things, like things that I have scheduled.
00:56:16I'm forgetting.
00:56:16Why am I forgetting these things?
00:56:18So I did a test, a professional test, not like some random personality test or something
00:56:23over three days.
00:56:25And, you know, I was diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety and immediately I was happy.
00:56:30My ADHD in me gave me, it gave me information, right?
00:56:33So whenever there's lack of information is when I get most thrown off.
00:56:37Um, so I'm always seeking information, comfort, very averse to change.
00:56:42So the minute I was aware of these things, it's actually made dealing much simpler and
00:56:48I'm not on any medication or anything, although I can be, but I chose not to.
00:56:53And I'm actually just actively working on it to help, um, get through it.
00:57:00Yeah.
00:57:00And I think I managed pretty well.
00:57:02Yeah.
00:57:03Thank you for sharing that.
00:57:03I mean, I think it's so useful for people to hear that because as you said, we always
00:57:09think everyone else is doing just fine and especially at parties and events.
00:57:13It's fascinating to me how many people who go to these, whether award shows, whatever it
00:57:18may be, the amount of people who say to me, I am so anxious and everyone's feeling that
00:57:24way.
00:57:24Everyone's going through it.
00:57:25Everyone's worried about what they're wearing, how they look, how the night's going to be,
00:57:29who they're going to bump into.
00:57:30Like, it's so incredible that everyone's feeling the same way, yet everyone's trying to act
00:57:36normal.
00:57:37And so I think, you know, people like yourself sharing that you feel it, you experience it
00:57:41and also how a diagnosis can actually relieve you of that pressure.
00:57:45It does.
00:57:46Yeah.
00:57:46And relieve you of that stress.
00:57:47Because it makes you feel like, you know, there's a lot of noise, there's a lot of chatter
00:57:54in your brain and you feel like, is it just my brain or is it just something that is happening
00:57:58to me today?
00:57:59And the minute you find an answer to it, you feel like, oh, it's not something that I was
00:58:04just making up for myself.
00:58:07That's what it is.
00:58:07Yeah.
00:58:08And it just, I think it's comforting.
00:58:10It's comforting to know that you had an inclination that something was holding you back from going
00:58:16about your day in a specific way.
00:58:18And now there's an answer to it.
00:58:19Yes.
00:58:20You get the comfort and then you put specific sort of, you know, structures in place in
00:58:26your life to help you get through that.
00:58:28And whatever that may be, to each his own, I chose to find ways to center myself through
00:58:33different ways and, you know, support, use the support of my team to maybe delegate a little
00:58:38bit more, do things so that I'm not, remind me about certain things.
00:58:41All those little, little things where I was like forgetting the most random things.
00:58:45But I think the need for getting it more in order came after being a mom because I was
00:58:49like, I don't want to forget anything related to my daughter.
00:58:52You know, I think that was my big fear.
00:58:53Again, parenting pressure that you put on yourself, etc.
00:58:56But yeah, that happened, I think, last to last year.
00:59:01And it's been a while since that happened.
00:59:02Again, the reason I also, again, talk about it is not to seem like, oh, I'm having such
00:59:09a hard time and look at me and like, you know, feel bad for me.
00:59:12It's none of that.
00:59:13And I think a lot of the times it's me and my sister when we sit and talk about it, it's
00:59:17not like we're only talking to each other about how we're struggling, but it'll just
00:59:21somehow come up when we're talking about this happening.
00:59:25And it's just understood that it's because of X, Y, Z reason.
00:59:29So the next time you talk about it, there's no need to explain again.
00:59:34So it's like an unsaid conversation.
00:59:36So I think the reason I'm also talking about it is that maybe a lot of times I might respond
00:59:40a certain way in a public event or a gathering or a situation or a conversation or a talk.
00:59:46And maybe I'm responding because of X, Y, Z reason.
00:59:51Yeah, for sure.
00:59:52For sure.
00:59:53And you were reminding me of something when you talked about multitasking, there was a study
00:59:57that showed that only 2% of the population, the world population, can actually multitask.
01:00:02But when 98% of people hear that, they think they're that 2%.
01:00:06And so everyone thinks that they can multitask.
01:00:08But really, it's such a rare, rare, rare ability.
01:00:12I actually realized I cannot multitask.
01:00:14I definitely can't.
01:00:15I can't.
01:00:15Because I, like, I can't.
01:00:19So I can take up multiple, multiple projects.
01:00:24Yeah, at the same time.
01:00:25And I can, I can be diligent.
01:00:28The word is I can micromanage.
01:00:30I can micromanage multiple things.
01:00:32Yeah.
01:00:32But I definitely cannot multitask.
01:00:34No, definitely.
01:00:34I thought I could always multitask when I can't.
01:00:37Yeah.
01:00:37No, but it's what you said.
01:00:39The trick is you think you can do it and you can probably do it for some time.
01:00:43But what you don't realize is that that battery runs out.
01:00:47And then very quickly, you realize you can't do it at all.
01:00:49And so maybe you can do it for a day.
01:00:50Or maybe you could do it for an hour or two.
01:00:53Maybe with certain things.
01:00:54I mean, I would always say, I think, oh, women are always used to multitasking.
01:00:58Maybe we are.
01:00:59I don't know.
01:00:59I would say this.
01:01:00But I've grown to realize about myself that, in fact, I almost stop hearing one thing if I'm focusing on the other.
01:01:07It's like, it's just my brain just shuts the other part down.
01:01:11Yeah.
01:01:11What have been some daily practices or habits that have changed your life, that have really helped you deal with the crazy schedule, now becoming a mother, playing all the different roles that you play?
01:01:21What have been some non-negotiables that you've really had to hone in on?
01:01:25I have to be very frank here.
01:01:28Because there have been multiple habits that I tried to set in place for myself.
01:01:33But I've not followed through with either.
01:01:36So I'm one of those people who hasn't been able to, let's see, I'm not talking about getting a workout in or that's like a daily habit, which has become like a part of my life now.
01:01:50It's not even a habit looking outside the window and listening to music and really unwinding.
01:01:54I'm not talking about those things because that's life.
01:01:56But like, for a brief period, I used to write things down so I could remember it.
01:02:01I don't do that anymore.
01:02:03For a brief period, I used to meditate because it used to help center me.
01:02:06I don't do that anymore.
01:02:07For a brief period, I used to color and paint whenever I used to feel anxious.
01:02:10I don't do that anymore.
01:02:11I just don't do anything anymore.
01:02:13Yeah.
01:02:13You know?
01:02:14So I'm actually...
01:02:15I love that honesty.
01:02:16Yeah, because a lot of people sometimes feel like, especially now, it's 2025, start to the new year, you need to set new year resolutions, need to do something new, you need to, you know, take control of your life in this particular way.
01:02:29There is that pressure to do that and do that and do that and do that.
01:02:36And in fact, there was this challenge called the 75 hard that I heard about and I was like, oh, I'm going to do the 75 hard and, you know, I'm going to do this.
01:02:42And my sister was like, Alia, you're not because you have enough going on.
01:02:47Now you don't need one more challenge.
01:02:49You know, you're a mom and you're working and you're doing...
01:02:52Like, don't.
01:02:53Like, right now, you, others might be able to, specifically you, do not need to take this on.
01:03:00And I was like, yeah, why am I going to take it on?
01:03:02Because again, I'm going to be compelled to go through with it and I'm not going to be able to go through with it.
01:03:06And then I'm going to feel like a failure, which is fine.
01:03:08I'm okay with feeling like a failure.
01:03:10But, you know, why do I add something more to my plate?
01:03:13So I've just realized to cut the clutter, do what comes naturally.
01:03:18So there's nothing new that I can speak about as a non-negotiable because I haven't stuck with it.
01:03:28That's the truth.
01:03:30I love the honesty.
01:03:31I think that's going to help so many people.
01:03:33Just like, you don't, yeah, it can get so like, you hear like, or something.
01:03:37I remember at one point in my life, my morning schedule is still pretty intense.
01:03:41But it used to be even more because I'd have journaling and I'd have gratitude.
01:03:45I'd have this and I'd have that.
01:03:46And so much of it, what I've realized is it becomes natural.
01:03:49Yeah.
01:03:49And so now it doesn't need to be this forced habit.
01:03:52Like my workouts are perhaps for myself.
01:03:54Exactly.
01:03:54It's become so natural that I have to get a workout in a daily, like six days a week.
01:04:02For example, last year, the start of 2024, I started the year by finishing a book and I was like, wow, because I hadn't finished a book in a really long time.
01:04:10I was like, wow, this year I'm going to finish at least five books.
01:04:13That was the last book I finished last year.
01:04:16I love it.
01:04:17It's not, because I would always start a book and not finish it, you know.
01:04:21So I read a couple of books on like parenting and this and that and like different, different things, but I would not finish the book.
01:04:26So I was like, I'm going to finish five books this year.
01:04:29Didn't finish anything.
01:04:30I love it.
01:04:30So already, like, you know, mid 2024, I was like, I'm already slacking, you know, I'm already behind my goals.
01:04:39So I decided this year, I'm not going to make any resolutions or whatever.
01:04:43I'm just going to be, just going to live, going to go about the day and do what comes naturally.
01:04:48Because if it comes naturally, it'll stick.
01:04:50Yeah.
01:04:50And it'll become a part of your life anyway.
01:04:53Yeah.
01:04:54I think you're going to relieve a lot of people of pressure and stress.
01:04:57Yeah, I think it is, it is important to acknowledge that not going through with new tasks that you set for yourself, for self growth is okay.
01:05:07As long as you're mentally conversing with yourself and actually being aware of the areas of growth, that kind of growth is enough.
01:05:17I'm very eager to grow in life, spiritually, mentally, physically, emotionally.
01:05:22But you can do that through listening and through conversation and through talking to yourself.
01:05:28Conversation with yourself.
01:05:29I think that's my non-negotiable.
01:05:31But I don't call that a daily practice.
01:05:33I think that's like, that's an hourly practice.
01:05:36Yeah.
01:05:36Yeah, that's constant.
01:05:38That's constant.
01:05:38And that everybody does.
01:05:40Yeah.
01:05:40So that's also enough.
01:05:41But I do have to say, it's very therapeutic for me to watch other people go about their regime and their lives on Instagram Reels.
01:05:47It's when I see like Sunday resets and Saturday resets and people lighting a candle and cleaning their house.
01:05:53I love it.
01:05:53It's so relaxing.
01:05:55And you can feel like you did it yourself.
01:05:58Yes, I think that's what it is.
01:06:00It's a guilty pleasure because it feels like it was me, but it's actually not.
01:06:02Yeah, you're just living vicariously through them.
01:06:05It's like ASMR as well.
01:06:06It's like that feeling.
01:06:07Yeah.
01:06:08Are you an ASMR fan?
01:06:09Yeah.
01:06:09Yeah, it's such a like, it's such a therapeutic healing process, seeing people do things that are good for themselves, for sure.
01:06:16It's amazing.
01:06:17Alia, it's been such a joy talking to you today.
01:06:19Thank you so much for being so open, being so honest.
01:06:23I think you made me laugh.
01:06:24You nearly made me cry.
01:06:26You nearly made yourself cry.
01:06:28It's been such a joy getting to know you more deeply.
01:06:30And I'm so grateful that my audience did as well.
01:06:33We end every show with a final five.
01:06:35These questions have to be answered in one word to one sentence maximum.
01:06:39We do this with every yes.
01:06:40So Alia, these are your final five.
01:06:42The first question is, what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?
01:06:47From my father.
01:06:49I'd rather be stupid than pretend to be intelligent.
01:06:52When did he say that to you?
01:06:54And how has it impacted you?
01:06:56He said this to me when I think I was wary of asking a question in class.
01:07:02And he said, you'd rather be stupid than pretend to be intelligent.
01:07:07Because if you don't ask the question, you'll never learn.
01:07:10Especially today.
01:07:11I think there's such little patience for getting things wrong.
01:07:15So I'd rather be wrong than pretend like I have the answer.
01:07:22Because if I have the answer, and I'd never know the reality.
01:07:27Like, I would never know the answer.
01:07:28And I don't mean this, like, Google the answer if I have to and pretend that I have the answer.
01:07:34But I'd rather not do that.
01:07:35I'm okay with not having the answers.
01:07:37Because I learn it when I, if I ask the question.
01:07:40Yeah, I love that advice.
01:07:42Second question.
01:07:43What's the worst advice you've ever heard or received?
01:07:46It was very simple.
01:07:47I think it's, and that left a big impression on me.
01:07:50It was very simple.
01:07:50Like, why can't I do that?
01:07:52It's because you're a girl.
01:07:55Somebody said that to me.
01:07:56It didn't make sense to me.
01:07:58I think I was very young.
01:08:00It was a very simple thing about maybe going out somewhere or something.
01:08:05Why can't I do that?
01:08:06Because you're a girl.
01:08:08Have you felt that continue in any part of your career?
01:08:10That was, yeah.
01:08:11That kind of judgment?
01:08:13Like I said, not off late.
01:08:15Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:08:15Not that I can remember in any specific way.
01:08:18I'm sure many people have, though.
01:08:20It's continuous.
01:08:21But not something that I've experienced off late that I can remember very clearly.
01:08:25Yeah, yeah.
01:08:26Question number three.
01:08:27How did you choose the name Raha?
01:08:28I think so, this was when both Ranbir and I were, you know, like eager parents asking
01:08:34we have family group, asking all the family members to give both boys and girls names.
01:08:39So, we're prepared.
01:08:39So, we can zero down on like a girl name and a boy name.
01:08:44So, there were multiple boy names and multiple girl names.
01:08:48And we really liked one boy name.
01:08:51We said, okay, this is a lovely boy name, which I'm not going to reveal now.
01:08:55And we said, okay, this name is lovely.
01:08:57Now, any more girl?
01:08:59And then my mother-in-law, Ranbir's mom, suggested, what about Raha?
01:09:05It'll go very well with the boy name as well, if you ever have a boy, you know.
01:09:10And a girl, if you have a boy and girl both, it'll be a really good combination.
01:09:14And then she suggested a girl and girl combination as well.
01:09:17But Ranbir and I instantly loved Raha.
01:09:21So, we had two names, just boy and girl, ready.
01:09:24I love it.
01:09:25Does it have a meaning?
01:09:26Is there a meaning word in it?
01:09:27Raha.
01:09:27Yeah, Raha means peace.
01:09:28It means joy.
01:09:30It means bliss.
01:09:31All the things that she is to us.
01:09:33Yeah.
01:09:34It's beautiful.
01:09:34I love that.
01:09:35It's a beautiful name.
01:09:35It's so unique as well.
01:09:36Yeah.
01:09:37It's really nice.
01:09:38Question number four.
01:09:39If you had to define this chapter of your life in one word or one sentence, what would
01:09:45you call it?
01:09:46Growth.
01:09:47In what way?
01:09:48You know, there's a feeling where you feel like your purpose is perhaps, because it's
01:09:56about on purpose.
01:09:57So, your purpose is perhaps outward, you know.
01:10:01I need to achieve this, I need to do that, you know.
01:10:04This chapter of my life is very inward.
01:10:07And not like I'm actively feel like there's a need for it.
01:10:11I'm just finding myself being way more interested in growth, in the different facets of my life.
01:10:19As a parent, as a partner, as a friend, as a person, as a professional, I'm eager to
01:10:26grow.
01:10:27Yeah.
01:10:27You know, not change anything majorly, but to really grow.
01:10:31Nice.
01:10:32What's something you wish people knew about you that maybe they don't know?
01:10:35I think most people know I'm random and strange and all those things.
01:10:42But there's this, Friends has really impacted me, the TV show Friends.
01:10:46And there's this one episode where Phoebe is being proposed to by her partner.
01:10:54Oh my God, what's his name?
01:10:55Matt, Dan, one of them, her final partner.
01:10:58And he said, Phoebe Buffet, I love you.
01:11:00You are this, you are that, and you're so wonderfully weird.
01:11:03I think that's the one thing that really stuck with me is because I want people to accept
01:11:10all the wonderfully weird parts of them as I do of mine.
01:11:14I love that.
01:11:15You know, I don't think anybody's perfect or has everything in order or does everything
01:11:20correctly or like right or whatever.
01:11:23But I love being wonderfully weird.
01:11:26I think I take pride in that.
01:11:28Yeah.
01:11:28I love that.
01:11:29I love that.
01:11:30I've got two more questions.
01:11:32I've added a couple in because I got so curious again.
01:11:35What's your current dream?
01:11:37You said you're a dreamer at the start.
01:11:39What do you dream of now?
01:11:40I'm a very passionate actor, professional, producer.
01:11:48I mean, I'm passionate about that.
01:11:49So I have dreams with regards to my work, which I don't think ever ends, you know, and I don't
01:11:57think I'm ever comfortable.
01:11:58And I really like that about my mind, you know.
01:12:05So I had a film released that last year that didn't do really well.
01:12:08And that's given me a new vigor for a new dream, you know, to try and do over, you know, it's
01:12:17something that really that I feel very charged by.
01:12:21So that's the professional dream.
01:12:23And I think, again, to just soak up as many moments as I can with my family, with my daughter.
01:12:31And if possible this year, take a solo trip.
01:12:36Nice.
01:12:36Yeah.
01:12:37Alone for four days.
01:12:38Yeah.
01:12:39Yeah.
01:12:39I think Ranbir and I both discussed it and we both were very excited about it.
01:12:43I said, you know, we both like carve out a time where you take like four days on your
01:12:48own and I take four days on my own.
01:12:50And let's see what happens there.
01:12:51Where did this come from?
01:12:52I don't know.
01:12:53It came from us actually not doing it in a really long while.
01:12:56And both of us are like, we're homebodies and lone bodies, you know, like we like to
01:13:01lone around on our own.
01:13:04On our own.
01:13:05On our own.
01:13:07And we both thrive individually, together, but individually as well.
01:13:12Yeah.
01:13:12I love that.
01:13:13Any ideas where you'd go?
01:13:15Not sure.
01:13:16Okay.
01:13:16We literally had this conversation two weeks ago.
01:13:18Any types of places that call to you?
01:13:22Like not even actual locations, but do you know what kind of...
01:13:24I'm a water person.
01:13:26Okay.
01:13:26I'm a fish, Piscean.
01:13:28So I love the water.
01:13:29So it would have to be a beach location because I love the water and the sun.
01:13:33And I would take many books and I would read them and I would finish them, you know, things
01:13:38like that.
01:13:39So that is the dream.
01:13:40Again, it's a great, very comfortable dream to have.
01:13:43Are you big in the star signs?
01:13:45Oh, huge.
01:13:46Okay.
01:13:46So, yeah, because you said that Ra is a scorpion.
01:13:49Yeah, Ra is a scorpion.
01:13:50I'm a Piscean.
01:13:50What date is your birthday?
01:13:5215th of March.
01:13:5315th of March.
01:13:53I'm a number six.
01:13:55Yeah.
01:13:55And so is my daughter.
01:13:56Yeah.
01:13:56She's number six, born in the year of six.
01:13:59Wow.
01:14:00So I'm very into numbers.
01:14:01And thanks to Puneet, my makeup artist, who is also my dear friend.
01:14:05She actually got me very influenced into this whole astrology, numbers, situation.
01:14:12So teach us something.
01:14:13Tell us.
01:14:14No, no.
01:14:14It's not like I have the, I don't have the, I don't have the thing.
01:14:17But I know that.
01:14:18And what's Ranbir?
01:14:19He's a Libran.
01:14:20He's a Libran.
01:14:20Okay, okay.
01:14:21Yeah.
01:14:21I just love finding similarities between, you know, star signs and people and numbers.
01:14:28It'll just naturally happen that I get along really well with number sixes.
01:14:34You know, my best friend, Ayaan, is a number six.
01:14:37Three, six, and nine.
01:14:39Explain how you get the six, for those who don't know.
01:14:41The birth date.
01:14:42Or the birth, like the day and the month and the year.
01:14:46So if I'm born on the sixth.
01:14:47You're born on the sixth?
01:14:48Sixth September.
01:14:49You're a number six.
01:14:50I'm a Virgo, yeah.
01:14:51Does that make me a six?
01:14:52See, that's why we could have, look, that's what I'm saying.
01:14:55That's why we could have a conversation.
01:14:56Got it, got it, got it.
01:14:57Okay, yeah.
01:14:57So yeah, if I'm born on the sixth, I'm a six.
01:14:59Yes.
01:14:59Yeah, okay, got it.
01:15:00You're a number six.
01:15:01Okay, got it.
01:15:01And then there's your moon sign and your star sign and your sun sign.
01:15:04And then that's a little, it's a little complicated.
01:15:06I'm like looking at Puneet right now because whatever.
01:15:09Yeah, I'm a Virgo.
01:15:11Yeah, so a lot of my best friends are Virgos.
01:15:14Oh, yeah.
01:15:14And all my best friends are Pisces.
01:15:16What are you saying?
01:15:16My sister's Pisces.
01:15:18My best man from my wedding's a Pisces.
01:15:20Like March is like, all my best friends are basically born between 8th to 18th of March.
01:15:24See this?
01:15:25That's why we're having this conversation like so easily.
01:15:28And apparently this year is very good for 3, 6 and 9.
01:15:31That's what I had too.
01:15:32My dad's into this stuff.
01:15:33And Pisces and Cancerians and whatever.
01:15:36And Virgos and Virgos.
01:15:38And Virgos.
01:15:38Sorry.
01:15:39So we are now getting into a completely different conversation.
01:15:42But I'm very into this and I love finding similarities.
01:15:45Like I said, my brain loves information.
01:15:47So I love putting these things together and then there's an answer.
01:15:51You know, it's ready for you.
01:15:52This all makes sense.
01:15:54You know.
01:15:54It's all laid out for you.
01:15:56I love it.
01:15:57When did this fascination start?
01:15:59I think when I started working with Buneet.
01:16:01And she would talk a lot about it.
01:16:03So then I would listen and then I would.
01:16:05The minute I start seeing result in the similarities.
01:16:11I would be like, wow, that's true.
01:16:12You know, they're here.
01:16:13There's an example.
01:16:14Like Mr. Bansali, Sanjali Bansali.
01:16:15He's a number 6 as well.
01:16:17And he's a Piscean.
01:16:18Yeah, right.
01:16:19And we got along like a house on fire.
01:16:22Yeah.
01:16:22So, and even like my best friends, you know, they're all either threes or nines.
01:16:30I very rarely get along with the four.
01:16:34No offense to a four.
01:16:35Yeah.
01:16:36But I very rarely get along with the four.
01:16:38I found it shocking when I realized, because obviously I've moved as well.
01:16:42So like all my best friends, whether I was living in New York, London, or LA, are all born in March.
01:16:48Like it was fascinating to me.
01:16:49It was like, it just happened that way.
01:16:51Yeah.
01:16:51And then you're like, wait, how does that work?
01:16:53And so I don't know as much about it.
01:16:55So my sister Pooja, she's also a number 6, born on the 24th of February.
01:16:59Yeah.
01:17:00Also a Piscean.
01:17:01She sent me this book.
01:17:03And the March, the month that I was born, it's so weird.
01:17:07Again, it's all in the science, right?
01:17:08Because I keep saying I'm a dreamer, I'm a dreamer, I'm a dreamer.
01:17:11So she sent me this book of each week has like a certain theme to it.
01:17:17You know, somebody is the perfectionist, the balance and the something.
01:17:21Mine was the dancers and dreamers.
01:17:24Oh, wow.
01:17:25And I was like, this is so strange because this is not something that I've read anywhere.
01:17:30I've just said it.
01:17:32You know, maybe it was on a T-shirt or something I see or saw it and I liked it.
01:17:37I don't know.
01:17:38But it resonated with me.
01:17:40Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:17:41So I like finding these similarities.
01:17:43What are these other hidden passions, weird little quirks or things
01:17:47that you find fascinating?
01:17:47I love planning.
01:17:48Okay.
01:17:49You know, I have vacations or work?
01:17:51Both.
01:17:51Both.
01:17:52I just plan.
01:17:53That's on a solo trip.
01:17:54I love planning.
01:17:56It deeply fascinates me and like satisfies me.
01:18:00It's like a hidden desire for me to be a wedding planner.
01:18:03Yeah.
01:18:03Oh, wow.
01:18:04Have you ever planned a wedding?
01:18:05Did you plan your own?
01:18:05I did plan my own.
01:18:06Yeah, of course.
01:18:07I think I did it really well.
01:18:09What did you do really well?
01:18:10What did you nail?
01:18:11I think the most important thing in a wedding is food.
01:18:14I agree.
01:18:15My wife would agree too.
01:18:16Yeah, so I nailed the food.
01:18:17I didn't nail it.
01:18:18My chef nailed it.
01:18:20As in the catering service that we hired.
01:18:25People want food and they want a great vibe.
01:18:28And yeah, I think it starts with food.
01:18:32Yeah.
01:18:32Genuinely.
01:18:33So, but just also like colors and combination and like, you know,
01:18:37like different themes and different.
01:18:38So I really have an inner desire.
01:18:41Like you can see me getting all excited talking about it.
01:18:43I know, I know.
01:18:43I'm telling my sister whenever she gets married,
01:18:47I'm planning her wedding and she's not hiring a wedding planner.
01:18:50I love that.
01:18:50I love that.
01:18:51And yeah, planning your four-day trip will be fun too.
01:18:53Yeah.
01:18:54That would be fun.
01:18:54Actually, I might not, I might take a break from planning on that.
01:18:57Okay.
01:18:59Specific trip.
01:18:59But I think because it comes from my need to micromanage when there are multiple people.
01:19:03Because right now for our new year vacation, we were like 20 people, you know, in Phuket.
01:19:08And I planned it from start to finish.
01:19:11And then when people are commending my planning and they're like, you know,
01:19:14you did such a lovely job and all that.
01:19:16I'm like, thank you.
01:19:17Thank you very much.
01:19:17It's the biggest compliment that I can receive.
01:19:20I love it.
01:19:20I love it.
01:19:21Fifth and final question.
01:19:23If you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?
01:19:28I think to just be kind.
01:19:32I love it.
01:19:32Alibaba, thank you so much.
01:19:34I'm so grateful.
01:19:35Thank you for your generous time.
01:19:37I was looking forward to doing this for a long term.
01:19:39I'm glad we did it.
01:19:40Yeah.
01:19:40I look forward to connecting with you again in LA.
01:19:42In your house.
01:19:43Yeah.
01:19:43With food.
01:19:44With food.
01:19:45Yes.
01:19:45My wife, that's what she does.
01:19:47So there's never any lack of food in our home.
01:19:49I remember most moments in life over food.
01:19:52Through food.
01:19:53Great.
01:19:53We should eat and do this next time.
01:19:56But no, I look forward to welcoming you and Rah and Ranbir over.
01:19:59And thank you so much for your time.
01:20:01If you love this episode, I need you to listen to one of my favorite conversations ever.
01:20:06It's with the one and only Tom Holland on how to overcome your social anxiety,
01:20:12especially in situations where you're not drinking and everyone else is.
01:20:16We talk about his sobriety journey and so much more.
01:20:20He gets really personal.
01:20:21I can't wait for you to hear it.
01:20:23It's going to blow your mind.
01:20:25The quote is, if you have a problem with me, text me.
01:20:27And if you don't have my number, you don't know me well enough to have a problem with
01:20:31me.
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