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  • 5 days ago
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00:00Dear Wendy Jones, the thing about my new home, London, in the country of England, in the Kingdom of the United, is that it has space for many kinds of women.
00:25You could be a woman with a secret you keep as locked away as your heart.
00:30You could be a strong-willed police sergeant who uses her trauma to solve grisly crimes.
00:38Come on up, Ned. Your tea will be nice and hot, but the bodies must be getting cold.
00:45A turpence for a game of nog-nog. Gentlemen, I've got the moistest hot cross buns in London town.
00:53You could be a sex worker with a heart of gold who's murdered simply for trying to survive.
01:00Or you could be a carefree party girl with her whole life ahead of her.
01:07But I am none of these women.
01:18No, I'm just a woman who stares at you online, Wendy Jones.
01:23Shall we look at Wendy's Instagram?
01:25All day and all night.
01:37Hey, baby, can you come here for a second?
01:39Oh, fuck! Oh, my God!
01:45Oh, my God!
01:47Oh, my God!
01:52Oh, my God!
01:54Stupid fuck!
01:55Oh, my God! This is bullshit!
01:57Oh, my God!
01:58Oh, my God!
01:59Oh, my God!
02:00Oh, my God!
02:09You don't have to wait to see if I get inside safe.
02:11I'm very not drunk.
02:12I've had, like, one alcohol.
02:13Uh-huh.
02:14Go ahead.
02:17Get out of here.
02:21I just wanted to say hi.
02:22Hello.
02:23Just stopping by.
02:24I mean, I have the key, so...
02:25Here I come.
02:26I'm just coming to get some...
02:27Maybe I'll...
02:28Something here.
02:31Fuck!
02:35I'm not the kind of girl you change the locks on!
02:37Fucker, bitch, whore!
02:38I'm going back for my girl.
02:39Let's go.
02:40You're such a dick.
02:41Here I go.
02:42Okay.
02:43It's much better.
03:07You're such a dick.
03:24Ah!
03:26Home invasion!
03:27Home invasion!
03:29Jess?
03:30Hi.
03:31How are ya?
03:32What the fuck?
03:33Wendy.
03:34Wendy, baby.
03:35Wake up.
03:37And there you were, Wendy Jones.
03:39Brooklyn was yours now.
03:40And so was the love of my life.
03:44Jessica?
03:45Yeah.
03:46It sure as hell is me.
03:47I'm Jessica.
03:48Hi.
03:49Wow, this is really surreal.
03:50Oh, is it so surreal?
03:51Jessica, what the fuck are you doing here?
03:53Hi, fucker!
03:55How about that?
03:56Girl, are you good?
03:57No, I'm actually not.
03:58And guess what?
03:59You're a fucking bitch.
04:00Wow.
04:01So you just woke me up and called me a bitch?
04:02Okay.
04:04Jessica, I've dealt with this before.
04:05Okay?
04:06I want to hold space for how you're feeling.
04:08And I understand that things might not be perfect right now for you, but you just broke into
04:14our home.
04:15And it's getting crazy.
04:16It's getting psychotic.
04:18Okay?
04:20Are you crying?
04:21No, no.
04:22I'm not.
04:23No, I just, I don't know.
04:24Nothing like this has ever happened before, you know?
04:26Just nothing, nothing this, this violent.
04:28Well, I mean, it's not violent.
04:30Yeah.
04:31Yet?
04:32Are you going to punch me in the head until I'm bleeding out on the floor?
04:34Can't we just work this out?
04:35You can have a Xanax.
04:36We can chill.
04:37Yeah, we can work it out.
04:38Sure.
04:39Let's just all sit down with a cup of tea and work it out.
04:41You, Zev Jeremiah Goldstein, need to sit down and write on a piece of paper that leaving
04:47me is the worst thing that anyone's ever done.
04:50Okay.
04:51You write that out, fucker!
04:52Okay.
04:53You write that out, blood bastard!
04:54Okay, you don't leave.
04:55In the next five seconds, I swear to God, we're going to call the police.
04:58Okay?
04:59Hey, stop!
05:00I'm not walking at you.
05:01I'm walking past you, little shorts.
05:03No, I'm gonna give you a kind of five.
05:04Five, four, three, two.
05:06One!
05:07Come on!
05:08Kill her!
05:10She's been fucking laughing!
05:11Yes, boss!
05:12Up!
05:13Up!
05:14Up!
05:15Up!
05:16Up!
05:17Up!
05:18Up!
05:19Up!
05:20Up!
05:21Up!
05:22Up!
05:23Up!
05:24Up!
05:25Up!
05:26Up!
05:27Up!
05:28Up!
05:29I may have taken a gnome to your door, Wendy.
05:30But you took an axe to my life!
05:31Up!
05:32Up!
05:33you stole what was mine and you forced me to move into an intergenerational
05:39gray garden tell of single women and one hairless dog
05:43laura please the nails the sound is horrible the problem is my nails what about mom's throat sound
05:50what are you doing well the new york times says that small motions see that these small motions
05:57i'm doing right here they can extend your life by up to 15 years i really encourage you to try
06:03hi alan rickman is so hot it's one of those faces where you look at first and you're like
06:08hmm and then you look for longer and you're like you could get it like i want to take him out back
06:14and then have him put it in my front yeah really encourage you to try to small motions mom this is
06:20very very shaming shaming shaming by suggesting that i would like my daughter to walk this earth with
06:26me for a little while longer you know i could be the dolly llama and you would still find fault with
06:31if i hadn't married a goy your mother wouldn't have married a goy and your sister wouldn't have
06:37married a goy and you wouldn't love all these boring goyish pictures
06:42the thing about a christian man is they always end up at the corner bar that's the reason you're all
06:50single and living in my house my christian man did not end up at the corner bar he ended up in bushwick
06:56doing therapeutic ketamine and experimenting with pansexuality it's different just remember
07:00that i was with the jew and he still dumped me like i was on fire oh that would be so funny
07:06please not you know if you've bruised yourself up a little you could make it with him again
07:11once you hook up with him once you go suck him off see if you can get him to come any day
07:16he has this erotic smell it could come right up the stairs i always knew you know what just accept
07:23it grandma's gonna hook up with your ex-boyfriend it's not a big deal well he's living with another
07:27woman right now and she is a model i'm 13 i'm not expected to have any plans on a friday night but
07:33you're all kind of a tragical lineup don't you think well don't look at me all my friends are dead
07:38we're having a girl's night what is wrong with you just get the drink goodbye see you in hell
07:45make sure you put vodka in there see you in hell how dare you i'm your fucking mother he is so much
07:52like his father honestly you have to reign him in you know what i love about this movie is emma
07:57thompson met her real life husband of 35 years on this film yes greg weiss he is so handsome
08:04my only consolation love stories set in pastoral england the romance the honor i mean nobody's
08:14fucking an influencer in the works of jane austen hi i'm jessica alba and i'm talking to you
08:24the mom waiting in the carpool lane can we can we cut do you have a hair in your eye no it's just
08:31this isn't the script i approved it it's i don't know i don't know what to say like you have me
08:39talking to everyone like they're 1950s housewives no so we had to do some punch-ups to the script
08:44because it was just starting to feel a little bit you know uh harsh you know you did punch-ups we get
08:48it like you know you have you have you have kids you have jobs and it's really hard for you but it's
08:53also really depressing why don't we get hair and makeup in so we can get the bangs off of her face i don't
08:58have bangs no bangs you know i think that she's more concerned about the script than the look and
09:04you made a lot of changes that she wasn't able to see until now wow i'm gonna go talk to the client
09:10about the script uh i'm the client this is my business i'm the boss oh sorry about him what a
09:18freaking nerd i am so over these underprepared jeffs how do they get hired and for what it's worth i
09:25mean i know that you don't have bangs you have long layers obviously yeah and you created this
09:29amazing company and i love dark angel it was a really influential show for me i wanted to be a
09:34bike messenger after watching listen okay so i have kind of a wild idea what if we get jeff to go take
09:40like i don't know a permanent nap and you and i can do this together you know shoot it in a few hours
09:49you and i do it you and i shoot it yes um i i don't think you want me i'm not very capable
09:55uh yes you are listen there's nothing that that man knows that you don't you are way more capable
10:03than him trust me wait wait where are you going oh i'm gonna go to the bathroom jessica alba why
10:11hey well hurry back okay because he's a bed everything is fine so chill out no it's not because
10:19i just found you staring into space gnawing on a danish with one hand and trying to pull a chunk
10:23out of your hair with the other it's under control no it's not dad is jessica alba just said you ran
10:28out of there and left her to be tucked into some random bed like an orphan in a horror film
10:31she just asked you to hold it down okay well have the ad do it he's a pupil person who loved that
10:37no she's not he's an ass grabber who somehow snuck by me too
10:40you know people ask me what it's like to work with my sister-in-law
10:50ex-sister-in-law i have to remind you that you left my sister to explore non-monogamy with a couple
10:55who are both named cody and you know i will tell whoever listens to me that we've never had an issue
10:59working together because you slay for me every time but something has shifted with you
11:06you had so much passion and drive and energy when i met you you had sparkle and now i don't know now
11:16you're mad you're just mad you probably haven't noticed because you've been so busy with the
11:24cody's but i've had a terrible year not only was i left by the man that i thought i would die with
11:29so was my sister and then we moved in with my mother who lost her house because she's spending
11:34too much money on sweaty betty apparel i used to think i was going to be like this great director
11:39really say something about the female experience you know i wanted to say something
11:42and then i had to revise that dream and now i've been working for people for 15 fucking years
11:49that wouldn't care if i die you took a gun and you were shooting me in the throat and i was laid
11:55on the floor bleeding they would have me replaced by lunch no no no no no no no guns no shooting
12:00you're fine you're fine you're fine but i get it you're unhappy okay listen we are merging with
12:09radigan and vine in london congratulations and they have asked about finding a super strong
12:15producer for this this big christmas ad and and i want to put you up for it
12:21i think this might revive the jest that i knew at the very least you won't tell my soon-to-be ex-wife
12:30when i show up with a forehead hickey
12:32you want me to go to london you love movies where women fan themselves and die of tuberculosis
12:41and shit you saw spice world nine times in the theater no i can't i can't leave the city
12:47this beautiful city i can't leave new york i am new york baby look at me i i have a lot i have i have
12:54to i have
12:55what babe what do you have
13:01and then i realized i could do it i could go and change my life you don't own me wendy jones
13:15there's the baby we'll miss you astrid you know i think it took me a long time before i realized that
13:25i wasn't fully mothered and part of it was post-war attitudes towards maternal obligation
13:32but some of it is just her bad personality so i want you to know that no matter how old you get
13:40and you will i will mother you i will mother you harder than you can take okay ouch
13:50it sounds violent mom well hopefully not if this is going on and on i'm going back inside
13:57i love you grandma it's very possible i won't see you again in this lifetime so give me a kiss
14:05on the lips i'm only kidding that's embarrassing when someone leans in remember to tickle all the
14:13guards at buckingham palace if anyone can make them smile it's you you got a lot of speech
14:19got a lot of spirit no waste but a lot of spirit okay get her in the house hi americans think british
14:27people are snotty and pretentious but smart british people think americans are stupid and vulgar
14:32but funny if you remember that you should be fine later i need to get the hat i'll kiss you on the lips of me
14:39oh my baby i'll miss you guys i love you call me right when you get there don't forget
14:47like how did we survive up until this point i don't know oh wait we didn't
14:52they are so crazy i can't believe that you're doing this you were the kid who like threw up on sleepovers
14:58and have to go home by 7 30 p.m i guess i'm all grown up then i want you to promise me this is important
15:04that you're not going to kiss anyone who's missing more than two teeth and if they are missing teeth
15:08they have to be in the back not the front but let them go down on me yeah of course that's going to be
15:12like an interesting kind of gummy sensation i don't want that then just remember okay
15:21you're my best thing
15:24i'm going to london you might not recognize me i had bangs in the last picture but it is she
15:30high five yeah
15:32aww
15:33wish i was one of your daughters
15:35oh cheers yeah they're not all mine just some of them
15:38do you guys know him are you guys okay
15:40no three of my nieces we just went to florida
15:43okay like that clears your name
15:45patient to the others kind to yourself open and your experiences close to pain
15:49patient to others kind to yourself open and your experiences close to pain
15:52yes i know exactly
16:02is that a dog
16:04yes
16:05yes
16:08ah a phone booth
16:10what's that?
16:11so funny
16:12those phone booths are so funny it's like probably people don't use them right
16:14oh my god that's fucking him palace
16:23look
16:24look
16:25look
16:26look
16:35here you go sister you want to lift
16:40oh no i think we missed it
16:42i'm looking for hoxton grove estate
16:44you know estate grounds
16:45flirting gardens
16:46archways
16:47some real
16:49merchant ivory type shit
16:50i don't
16:51i think it's that
16:52and
16:53good luck with that love
16:54i just
16:55i don't think this is it
16:56it is
16:57i've seen it yet
16:58no
16:59that's uh
17:0098.75
17:01please
17:02welcome to london
17:04last trip mama
17:11when are they coming to fix the dryer
17:15do you say because my sheets are still damp
17:17there's nothing you're not used to
17:19excuse me i told you not to talk about that
17:22oh
17:23oh
17:24oh
17:25guys i'm sick of this lie
17:26hello
17:36oh
17:37sorry
17:38i'm gaz
17:39live here in the building
17:41uh
17:42i've been put in charge of your stay
17:44while your host bob and shirley enjoy their autumn in marbella
17:47it's the life innit eh
17:48who are you
17:49little creature hi
17:51nice to meet you
17:52i sure hope you're sweet
17:54she's not
17:55only because i lost me leg
17:56nearly nearly lost me leg
17:57to the ball terrier
17:58just
17:59just down there
18:00yeah we had to put her down
18:02how did you
18:03never mind
18:04i'll get the door
18:05it's just a little bit of a nap to it
18:08all right
18:09welcome in
18:13it said estate
18:14and um
18:15i just
18:16yeah
18:17a different picture in my head
18:18i swore i saw crown molding in the description
18:21yep
18:22but you know that's like
18:23that's just a stain
18:24uh
18:25uh
18:26that actually i believe is uh
18:27champagne
18:28uh
18:29stain
18:30i mean i i'm being so
18:31silly it's just
18:32it's temporary right
18:33three months i'm probably not even going to be home a lot
18:35i'm probably going to be at like amazing parties or something
18:37yeah
18:38type it in
18:39that's a really nice photo of you
18:42that's the one from murder she wrote
18:44really
18:45okay
18:46okay
18:47okay do you have the keys
18:49so nothing was really inspiring me in my closet
18:51and i just like
18:53i've got this new knitting machine and it's just incredible
18:56i can like make these kind of tube styles really easy so
18:59oh you made your own outfit
19:01yeah
19:02oh you can't go to a store and buy an outfit
19:04yeah
19:05tell me if you think it's um crazy cute or crazy crazy
19:09oh my god i'm in hell
19:22hey baby can you come here for a second
19:24can you come here for a second
19:25oh fuck
19:26oh my god
19:27oh my god
19:28oh my god
19:29oh my god
19:33oh my god
19:38stupid
19:39ah
19:40no wendy
19:41no
19:42no okay
19:43i came here to release you
19:45not to replay you again and again
19:47so i'll put on my dress
19:49and i'll handle my hair
19:50and i'll go to a random bar
19:52sorry pub
19:53and i'll let life have its way with me
19:56or you know
19:57maybe i'll
19:58i'll have my way with it
20:00with my life
20:01i'll just
20:02ah
20:03get over there and i'll have my way with my life
20:05there you go
20:06that makes sense
20:23where are you from
20:30where are you from
20:31gentlemen that can't get it up
20:33and women that fart in their sleep
20:36welcome to the 100 millionth installment of easy cum
20:40where we bring you the best musicians live and direct
20:44and we're lucky to have with us one of our regulars
20:46he's the king of excess
20:48a crystalline raindrop of a boy
20:50along with whatever form his band takes tonight
20:53i give you
20:54felix and the feelers
20:56yes
20:57yeah thanks john
20:59here you go
21:00thank you
21:02thank you
21:03thank you
21:05thank you
21:10i would rather
21:17lie here in venus's lab
21:20Like here in Venus is loud
21:24Like a pearl
21:26But Mars is red and mad
21:32Waging war like a game
21:37I'm bursting into flames
21:40Give me that honey
21:43I just want honey
21:47It's always the girls
21:52It's always the girls
21:54It's always the girls
21:59It's always the girls
22:02Oh
22:07Oh my God
22:17Fucking hell
22:24Who's done that?
22:26Fuck's sake
22:27Yo, sorry, have you got any bog roll in there?
22:34Oh, hi
22:34Hi, I'm sorry, I'm not telling no shit or anything
22:37It's just a total fucking carnage situation in here
22:40Sorry, are you talking to me?
22:42Uh, yep
22:43Can you see my hand?
22:44Yeah
22:44Have you got any bog roll?
22:46Oh
22:46What do you call it?
22:48Toilet
22:48Yeah, thank you
22:49Okay
22:52Yeah, I just don't want someone to think it was me
22:54Do you know what I mean?
22:56Fuck me
22:57I'm actually doing quite a good job of that in here
23:02Oh, you sing
23:06You're the singing guy
23:07Oh yeah, yeah
23:08It was really nice
23:09Thanks, yeah, bit of a weird song that one
23:12I think all the sinks are broken
23:13Yeah, you can still use the soap though
23:15Just rub it in
23:16No, you can't
23:17You have to rinse off the soap
23:19Otherwise you have germs and soap on your hands
23:20Plus you'll be like really sticky
23:22Feel that?
23:24Yeah, you're really sticky
23:25Won't be in ten minutes though
23:27Why?
23:28What are you going to do?
23:28Chop your hands off?
23:30Do you want one of those drinks by the way?
23:31They're my friends
23:32But they've probably got new ones by now
23:33Oh, no offense
23:34I would literally never take an open drink from a man
23:37Especially one who doesn't wash his hands
23:38Fair enough
23:39Felix, by the way
23:40Thanks for the book
23:41Okay, I'm just
23:42I'm Jessica
23:45Are you okay?
24:02Fine, yeah
24:03Are you sure?
24:07You seem kind of
24:08Not okay
24:10Vibes
24:11Can I just be where I am
24:13Or do I have to smile all the time
24:15Like some laughing clown?
24:17I mean, you hardly ever smile
24:19That's one of the things I like about you
24:21Then when you do smile
24:24It's extra Spanish
24:27Smile button
24:28Oh, it's broken
24:30Nope
24:34Shall I guess?
24:37Later, Felix
24:38Oh, yeah
24:39Wow
24:40Maybe I'll take a Diet Coke
24:42Whenever you get the chance
24:44But don't worry about it
24:46I mean, I'm not even thirsty
24:48I love this place
24:50So indie
24:51It's awesome
24:53Oh my god
24:56Oh my god
25:01Hey
25:02What?
25:04That's funny
25:05Seeing you here
25:06I was literally just thinking about
25:07Whether you believed me
25:09About how it wasn't me
25:10Pissed on the toilet seat
25:11No, I mean
25:13I saw it before
25:14What are you doing
25:15Standing on your own
25:15Under a bridge?
25:17I'm like trying to get an Uber
25:18I don't understand
25:19Why this is not working
25:20Do you know where this is?
25:21Yeah, you've ordered that to Heathrow
25:25Okay
25:26That explains it
25:27I guess I'll just walk
25:30It's probably not that far
25:32What if you accidentally walk to Heathrow?
25:35I mean, that's a distinct possibility, I guess
25:37Where are you going?
25:39I feel like it's about to piss it down
25:40Hoxton Grove Estate?
25:44What?
25:46I bet you thought that meant something else, didn't you
25:48When you saw the word estate?
25:49I mean, I'm not upset
25:50I just need to adjust my expectations
25:52I'm always like
25:53Adjusting my expectations
25:55Let me guess
25:55Are you like one of those
25:56Love Actually loving girls?
25:59I don't know
25:59Is it like the crown?
26:00You're obsessed with the crown?
26:01You're on like a pilgrimage?
26:01No, I'm not obsessed with the crown
26:03Thank you very much
26:05I'm a Wuthering Heights
26:08Crime Suspect Rising, I guess
26:10Shit, okay
26:11Sorry, I underestimated you
26:12Yeah, you did
26:14I mean, I did have a special edition
26:16Princess Diana
26:17Beanie Baby
26:18Yeah, we all had those
26:19You've got, like, an American accent, right?
26:21No, I'm not
26:22I don't have that
26:24I don't have an American accent
26:25It's Slovakian, actually
26:26I've actually always liked American things
26:28Really? Like what?
26:30The Simpsons
26:30I actually genuinely like The Simpsons
26:32Yeah, it's a good show
26:33Captain Crunch
26:35Yum
26:35Delicious
26:36Oxycontin
26:39That's American, right?
26:40Big fan of that
26:40I love that
26:41Yeah
26:41It's my favourite breakfast
26:43Sorry, how long have you been here again?
26:47Um, I got in today
26:49And I got here today
26:51What the fuck?
26:52I know
26:53What are you doing in, like, South London
26:55Without any of your friends?
26:56Well, do you want me to tell you the truth?
27:00My ex-boyfriend and I split up six months ago
27:03Because he couldn't see himself as, like, a father and a husband
27:06And now he's engaged to, like, an online girl
27:10Like an influencer
27:11She makes lip gloss
27:13Do you want me to murder them?
27:14Yeah
27:15I want you to cut their heads off and sew them back on
27:17As a lesson
27:19I don't want you to fully kill them
27:20But
27:21I'll root you on
27:23You're cold, by the way
27:24Of course
27:25No
27:27I run hot
27:28Yeah
27:28I'm, like, sweating
27:30Do you want to walk?
27:33Are you going to my house?
27:35Well, I don't want you to get murdered on your first night in London
27:37It's really nice
27:38No, I'm sort of semi-squatting with a friend
27:42Near this area called Angel
27:44We actually live, like, right across from the internet
27:46It's really doing my head in
27:47The internet?
27:49Yeah, like, one of the big companies
27:50Like, the internet companies
27:51It's really stressing me out
27:53Because, like, when I wake up in the morning
27:54Like, we live literally right opposite this building
27:56So I'm, like, have they just been beaming internet signals
27:59Like, straight into my brain
28:00And, like, my crotch all night
28:02Do you know what I mean?
28:03That sounds really, like, sexual
28:05What? Like, I mean, fucked by the internet?
28:08Yeah
28:08That's how it feels
28:09I feel like I've been fucked all night by this internet building
28:12That's disgusting
28:13I actually heard my neighbour yell cunt really loudly
28:18And then, like, throw her husband up against the wall
28:21At least that's what it sounds like
28:22What, in, like, where you're going now?
28:25Mm-hmm, where I'm going now
28:27Dark, okay
28:28I know, I don't know why I said that
28:29What a bummer
28:30You're sure it's this far?
28:32Oh, this is, like, a two-hour affair, at least
28:34Oh, so now we're having an affair?
28:36Mm-hmm, I'm actually getting really cold
28:40Oh, yeah?
28:42Do you want my jacket?
28:44Yes, please
28:44It's kind of blustery
28:46Like, you're surrounded by tall buildings, right?
28:48Yeah
28:48Do you need a hand?
28:51There you go
28:52Fucking hell, are you going to blow away?
28:57I'm actually really hot now, sorry
28:58What?
28:59Yeah, I'm immediately hot
29:00But it's a very thick jacket
29:01This is a whirlwind, all right
29:01Yeah
29:02Okay
29:03Well, do you want to come up and see my new horrible, shitty new apartment?
29:10Your apartment?
29:12Oh, my God, my apartment sucks
29:14I don't sound like that
29:16Yeah, sure, right
29:19This isn't horrible at all
29:23It's kind of homey
29:25It's like being in a grandma's suitcase or something
29:29I quite like it
29:30Oh, my God, who is that?
29:33How'd you get in here?
29:34What is that?
29:37Is that your dog?
29:39She's a weirdo, but she's an iconic queen
29:41Hey
29:42I mean, I guess we're all weirdos, aren't we?
29:45I adopted her when she was nine
29:48She's ten now
29:49She had a cancerous lump on her lungs
29:51So I emptied out my savings and got it removed
29:54And now she's just a cancer-free lump
29:56Oh
29:57Hey, hi, lumpkin
29:58Okay, she's not wearing any clothes
30:01Stop looking at her
30:02Okay
30:03Does she have a favourite song?
30:07Um, probably anything by Fiona Apple
30:09Oh
30:11Title's a good album
30:13Well, it's the first CD I ever owned
30:15Title
30:19Not like Backstreet Boys or
30:22That song about how it's just a little crush or whatever
30:25Who'd leave you?
30:34Fuck that guy
30:35Well, you don't know him
30:37Maybe he's amazing
30:38Maybe you guys would be best friends
30:39No, I don't think we'd be best friends
30:42Um, sorry
30:56Sorry
30:57Are you sick?
31:00No, I'm just, like, seeing someone
31:03Uh, like, it's not
31:05It's probably not gonna work out
31:07But just because it's been a few months
31:08Yeah, um, sure
31:10I'm just trying to do stuff a bit differently
31:12Like, so I feel like
31:13I was kidding
31:14I'm so tired
31:15I just, um, I gotta work
31:18Not tonight
31:18I'm not, like, a night worker
31:19I'm not, like, a cop
31:20Okay
31:21I shouldn't have even went out tonight
31:23Where's my bed
31:25Gotta go to
31:27I feel like I'm asleep right now
31:28I mean, do you want to hang out, like, another time?
31:31Yeah, hope you have a nice, amazing night
31:33Yeah, good to meet you, too
31:33Do you want to, like, swap, you know, like, numbers or
31:36I need to go to sleep
31:38Cool, okay
31:39All right
31:39Get out of here or I'll catch you again
31:41I'm kidding
31:42All right
31:43Yeah
31:43See you later
31:44You don't have a bag or something?
31:46No, I didn't
31:46Okay
31:47You're okay, yeah?
31:48I hope to see you singing around town
31:50Cool
31:50All right
31:51Bye
31:51I saw a bug
31:58Dear, dear Wendy Jones
32:06I'm no longer dreaming of a new life
32:08I'm living it
32:09I'm gonna take a lover
32:10Not the guy that was here tonight
32:12He's kind of weird
32:13But a different lover
32:14Many lovers
32:15We're all gonna make love
32:17Or something like that
32:18The fire of my passion
32:20Cannot be extinguished
32:22Oh my god
32:25Oh my god
32:26Stop, drive, and roll
32:27Stop, drive, and roll
32:30Oh my god
32:319-1-1, 9-1-1
32:449-1-1, 9-1-1
33:00Or is it different here?
33:029-0-1, 9-9-9?
33:06I feel like I'm really dizzy
33:07I feel like I'm gonna pass out or something
33:10Can you unlock the door for us, ma'am?
33:12I just feel like I'm really gonna go down here
33:16I'm not drunk
33:17If you thought I was drunk
33:17I'm not drunk
33:19Yeah, look, we're very dear friends
33:21Very, very close
33:22If any last minute operations or decisions
33:25I'm your guy, all right?
33:26So what's going on?
33:28Does she do it on top of someone?
33:29Before we go, we needed to get her under some cold water
33:32Like I'm pasta
33:34What, ma'am?
33:35Like I'm pasta
33:36I'm burned and this little guy's just spraying me
33:40You're fine
33:41Just keep breathing
33:43Just keep breathing
33:44Like you're giving birth to twins
33:46Wait, where's my dog?
33:47You guys aren't watching my dog
33:49If she was a kid, you guys would be watching her
33:51You only care about kids
33:52You don't care about dogs
33:54What, that little goat?
33:55I thought it was a heaven's cat
33:56Stay with me
33:59You all right?
34:02And by God, Wendy
34:04There he was
34:05My Mr. Darcy
34:07My Rochester
34:08My Alan Rickman
34:10My...
34:11Felix
34:24Goin' down like
34:24How come every time you come around my London, London bridge
34:29Wanna go down like
34:30London, London, London
34:31Wanna go down like
34:32London, London, London
34:34We goin' down like
34:35You got your guilt in the news
34:37Now I'm wishin' that I didn't wear these shoes
34:39It's like every time I get up on the dude
34:42Paparazzi put my business in the news
34:45And I'm like, get up out my face
34:47Oh, shit
34:47Or I turn around and spray your ass with me
34:49Oh, shit
34:50My lips make you wanna have a taste
34:52Oh, shit
34:52You got that?
34:53I got the Bae
34:55Woo!
34:55How come every time you come around my London, London bridge
35:00Wanna go down like
35:01La-da-da-da-da-da-da
35:02Wanna go down like
35:03La-da-da-da-da-da-da-da
35:05Be goin' down like
35:06How come every time you come around my London, London bridge
35:10Wanna go down like
35:11La-da-da-da-da-da-da-da
35:12Wanna go down like
35:14Oh, shit, you know the world.
35:44Oh, shit.
36:14Oh, shit.
36:44Oh, shit.
37:14Oh, shit.
37:44Oh, shit.
37:46Oh, shit.
37:48Oh, shit.
37:50Oh, shit.

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