- 2 days ago
Mahmoud Elansary talks to Mexican American U.S. Staff Sergeant, Lourdes Loyola, Converts to Islam after her deployment to Afghanistan, then her children all convert! 5 years later they all get to watch as their Husband and Father emotionally converts to Islam as well. Lourdes is a Proud Mexican American Soldier who converted to Islam and never looked back.
#military #islam #convert #muslim #latino #podcast
#military #islam #convert #muslim #latino #podcast
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00:00Lourdes Loyola, thank you for joining the podcast. I'm excited to have you.
00:10Thank you. I'm excited to be here.
00:11I'm very interested in your life story and the butterfly effects and the things that had to take place in your life in order for you to find Islam,
00:19the people and the events that had to occur in order for that to happen.
00:23So what was your journey to Islam?
00:24So to Islam, I actually found Islam years after I was in the military.
00:28So I had already joined the military. I joined the military in 2009.
00:33And then I started looking into Islam in 2015.
00:37Now, I have been deployed twice to Afghanistan.
00:40So I had already met Muslims at that time that were from Afghanistan.
00:45Very nice people. It kind of really changed my perspective on what Islam and Muslims really were.
00:52Mind you, at that time, I wasn't interested. It's not like I was looking for anything.
00:55It was just kind of like, OK, Muslims aren't who the media, the news, Hollywood portrayed Muslims to be.
01:04They're just absolutely normal people trying to make a living just like us, you know.
01:10But it wasn't until 2015. I have a brother in the military.
01:15He's he's not in the military anymore, but I have a brother in the military that I knew he was Muslim.
01:20Right. But all I knew about him was that he didn't eat pork.
01:23Like that's literally the extent of my Islamic knowledge when it came to Islam.
01:28Right. But during 2015, when when the elections started happening,
01:34I don't know if you recall, there was a lot of negative talk about Islam and Muslims.
01:38And it was just like really bad. People were getting bold, very bold online.
01:43And I'm the type of person that likes to stand up for people like all kinds of people.
01:47If you're being oppressed by society or by another group of people like I'm here for you.
01:52And that's just always been me.
01:54Right. So when the elections happened and I started seeing like a lot of people talking about about Muslims,
01:59I was like, nobody's going to talk about about my brother's religion. Right.
02:03But another thing about me is that I like to come at people with facts.
02:07So I started researching, researching Islam because I wanted to combat the trolls online.
02:14But with facts, you know, I didn't I didn't want to come in with emotion.
02:18I wanted to come in with the facts. So I started looking into the Koran.
02:22And I started reading and then eventually we were in Nebraska at the time.
02:26And then eventually I found an open house at a mosque and I went.
02:33And at that point, I was like really interested, but I still had a lot of questions.
02:37And I had really stupid questions that, you know, when I went and they gave their presentation,
02:44everybody was really nice. And at the end, they were like, OK, you know, questions, right.
02:48Q&A. And so right away, I raised my hand and I'm like, so how come women aren't allowed to have the
02:55same inheritance as men? And how come you guys are linked with terrorism?
03:00I mean, all kinds of questions. I mean, I was going at them because I just I don't know.
03:05I felt like I needed the answers. And now that I look back at it, I think it was a lot like
03:09making sure that because he knows who I am, making sure that I was pleased with everything that I was
03:16hearing. And I was very pleased with everything that I heard. And at the end of the of all my
03:22questions, because I feel like I was the only one asking questions. But at the end, I asked the
03:26person who was giving the presentation. I was like, so why don't we why don't you guys see pork?
03:31And he said, well, just because, you know, that's what God said. And I was raised in the Catholic
03:38church and I went to church because I wanted to go to church. Like I wasn't your typical
03:43Mexican girl who their mom or their grandmother forced them to go to church. I literally went to
03:48church with my sister because we wanted to. I mean, we were in the children's choir.
03:52The youth grew. Once we started growing up, you know, we were very involved. I'm talking
03:56Tuesdays, Thursdays, Sundays, like anytime like that was where we would go to. But when I grew up and I
04:04started asking questions, the answer that I would always get was just have faith. Oh, just because
04:09it's just because God said so. So that really kind of started pushing me away from the Catholic
04:14church. So back to the story is when when they when they told me, oh, just because it kind of
04:22like brought me back to the whole like Catholicism. And it's like, OK, well, I guess this is maybe how
04:26they are as well. So I left content. You know, once everything was done, I said to myself, OK,
04:33well, you know what? I think I have enough ammo to combat the trolls. Right. But I feel like
04:39I knew that that's where I wanted to be. But that question really pushed me back. And I just I was
04:45like, OK, that's fine. I love I love the Muslim people. You know, this was great. It was very
04:50informative. I'm out. You know, I have I came I came and I got what I was looking for. But before I
04:57left, one of the sisters, she she reached she reached out to me. She's like, hey, she's like, are you
05:02the sister that asked about why we don't eat pork? And I said, yes, it was me. And so she explained it in
05:07detail to me as to why we don't eat pork. And I took that as a sign, as silly as that may be,
05:13because I think that, like I said, God really knew what my struggles were in the Catholic Church
05:17so that when that sister came up to me before I left and gave me the answer, I was like, OK,
05:24everything makes sense, like literally everything that I know as of now. And I'm just still sitting
05:29there talking, you know, to everybody. And a brother comes close and he's like, you know,
05:34so so what are you waiting for? Like, what is holding you back from being Muslim?
05:39And I looked at him and I'm like, nothing. And he's like, so do you want to take your shahada
05:42right now? And I was like, yeah, I do. And so I literally took my shahada that same day.
05:47What what was the range for this? How many months or years did this take for you?
05:51Oh, this was months. I'm talking like maybe three, four months. And I knew, obviously,
05:57I still had a lot to learn. Right. But something I can't explain it, but it was something in my heart
06:02that was really pulling me in there. And when I took my shahada, I felt like I was at home,
06:07like I had made it home. And whatever that looked like, you know, I felt so at peace.
06:12I felt like I was where I was always meant to be, like I belong there. So I knew that I was still
06:19going to continue to study. But that was back in December 10 of 2015. So ever since then,
06:27I've been studying and there's absolutely nothing in the Quran that I sit here and I doubt
06:31or I feel like I'm oppressed, like there's nothing negative about Islam that has ever made me
06:37question why I became Muslim. Did you? A lot of people cry when they take their shahada. Did you?
06:44Yes. I am an emotional gangster. Yeah, I did. Don't tell anybody though.
06:54So how did your husband take it? Super like cool about it. You know, I remember going to him and
07:00telling him, hey, like, we're going to raise the boys in Islam. And he was like, okay.
07:07Yeah. And I get a lot of heat for that because obviously he wasn't Muslim either.
07:10But I was just like, okay, we're going to take them to the mosque. And he's like, okay, that's fine.
07:14I was like, all right. Yeah. Like he did not care at all. He's always been very supportive about
07:20all of us being Muslim first. Obviously he is Muslim now. Alhamdulillah. But in the beginning,
07:26he was very supportive. Even when I kind of had doubts about wearing my hijab, when it comes to my
07:31job, he was very supportive, you know, and I know that that's rare to see, especially from a non-Muslim
07:38husband. But he was very supportive. Tell me about that a little bit with the hijab. How long did it
07:44take you? What kind of thoughts went through your head and doubts and even, you know, hope?
07:49So for me, it was, I have loved my journey in Islam. I thank God that I was in that present in social
08:00media because I see social media, like really pushing people away from the religion. But when
08:06I converted, I didn't let anybody force me into anything or feel pressured into doing something
08:11like wearing the hijab. Right. So when I converted, I didn't even think about wearing it. I just,
08:17I was doing my own thing, you know, trying to find my own place in, in the religion, my own path.
08:22So, like I said, I converted in December of 2015 and I started wearing my hijab full-time in,
08:31I want to say June of 2018. Okay. And it was something that I felt ready for. Like,
08:39I felt like, okay, I really want to do this. Like I, it makes me feel closer to Allah because before I
08:43started wearing it full-time, um, I would wear it here and there, you know, I would try it on.
08:48Even when I went to the gym, I had already started wearing, I'd always wear pants. And then I started
08:52wearing long sleeve shirts, um, then turtleneck type of long sleeve shirts. Um, so little by little,
08:58I allowed myself those steps, that journey to, to wearing a hijab where I feel like a lot of us
09:04as Muslim women, we don't get that space to even explore steps into the hijab. It's like all or
09:10nothing, wear it or don't wear it. You're embarrassing the religion, take it off. Cause
09:14you're not wearing it. Right. Cause you're wearing makeup. You know, it's just always all or nothing
09:18for us. It seems like, but like I said, I, I didn't have anybody to pressure me maybe because
09:23none of my family is Muslim, um, that I was the first one. So I did everything at my own pace.
09:29Like I said, my husband was beyond supportive cause I was doubting it, you know, the looks, just
09:33everything. And he was like, just do what is best for you. Like if you're always going to wait on
09:39everybody else's approval, you're never going to do what you feel in your heart. So he's actually
09:44one of the biggest reasons why I started to wear the hijab full time. That's amazing. Now that you
09:51converted to Islam and you wanting inshallah for your husband to one day convert and what the
09:56community was telling you and how you dealt with that. No one has ever said anything negative to me
10:02in person, whether it's about my religion, uh, my husband, not being Muslim at that time,
10:07my job. Like maybe I have a face of like, don't mess with me, but no one has ever said anything
10:15to my face. Um, believe it or not, I was okay. Like I had already made up in my mind that my husband
10:24was never going to convert. Like I never in a million years thought that my husband was going
10:29to be Muslim. Just who he is. Yes. He was Catholic, but it's not like he was a practicing,
10:35practicing Catholic and neither was I like, I'm not trying to give off the vibe that I was at church
10:39like 24 seven. I was there, but I don't, I don't consider myself that I was a very practicing Catholic
10:47either. Um, but with my husband, I had, like I said, I had already said in my mind that he was
10:52just never going to convert. And I was okay with that. Like, because I felt it's better to have a
10:57loving husband and a supportive husband when it, when it comes to Islam, right? Like I said,
11:02he was very supportive of me, of the kids. He would stand guard when we would pray in public,
11:08me and the boys. Um, so I was more than happy with the supportive Catholic husband that I had
11:15that it didn't bother me. Like I never felt like Islam came to break families up. Like that doesn't
11:21make sense to me. So I was just like, okay, well, he's going to be Catholic and I'm going to be Muslim
11:26and we're going to be married and we're going to live in an interfaith household. And that's
11:30completely okay. Um, well, how did you reconcile with the Islamic law that a Muslim woman can't be
11:37married to a non-Muslim man? My common sense and everything that's in the Quran. Um, I don't think
11:43it makes sense to break up a home. Like if I would have divorced my husband, being that he was so
11:47supportive, like I said, he would literally take our boys to the male section of the mosque to pray,
11:53even as a non-Muslim. So I feel like my common sense and everything that I've read in the Quran and
11:59everything that I've studied about it, it didn't make sense that the religion of Islam and our
12:05merciful God would want me to divorce my husband. Cause that's all that my husband would have taken
12:10from that. My husband would have taken, Oh wow, look, my, my wife converted to Islam and she divorced
12:15me for no reason, even though I was supportive towards her and the boys. And then even our children
12:20would have been like, my mom converted to Islam. And because of that, she divorced our dad.
12:24So that just doesn't make sense. Not even Islamically. Like I get that Muslim women aren't
12:30supposed to be married to non-Muslim men, but I also believe that there's a case by case basis.
12:36And for things like that, that's where you rely on muftis and scholarly opinions. And nobody that I
12:42talked to ever, ever gave us that advice of like, yeah, divorce your, your loving and supportive
12:48husband. You know, no, no one ever said that to us. So. Yeah. Cause that, that's a little,
12:53I I'm glad you, you, you ended it with that because a lot of people, I get worried when
12:58they say common sense, because it's like, well, sometimes the shaitan comes into your sense,
13:02right? Sometimes the devil comes in, but you, you took advice from imams. Right. And I feel like
13:08that's very different than like a single Muslim woman choosing to marry a non-Muslim man. Like,
13:13like I said, there's a case by case basis. Yeah. So to me, I'm like, it doesn't make sense.
13:19It's a night and day difference. Yes, exactly. Exactly. So you took a, you sought counsel in
13:25that, in that time period. Okay. Okay. I see what you mean. So that now we actually have our first
13:30born Muslim baby boy. Oh, yeah. Tell me a little bit, cause I might have to bring him on himself.
13:37Bring him on, bring him on. But tell me a little bit about how, what, what made him decide to become
13:42Muslim. You said it was five years later? Four, about four years later. Four. Okay. And what finally
13:48convinced him? What really did it for him? I mean, obviously I think it's best for him to say,
13:53but if, you know, what he told me, what he told me was that, um, it was, we were actually at the
14:02mosque that day. He had asked us if we wanted to go to the mosque that Friday. So we're like,
14:07of course, you know, like let's go. So, and it's obviously rare for us to be able to go to the mosque
14:12on Fridays because we all work, we go to school. So I don't even remember why none of us were at work
14:17or school, but you know, obviously it was a good reason. So, um, he's actually the one that brought
14:24up the idea of going to the mosque that Friday. So we get everybody ready. You know, we go to the
14:28mosque by this time. I, both of our sons at, we only had two at the time. We have three now,
14:32but both of our sons were already Muslim as well. Um, and so he's like, Hey, you guys want to go to
14:37the mosque? We're like, sure, let's go. So we get there and the imam was actually, uh, his khutbah was
14:43about how we need to take steps, how we need to build our foundation in Islam. You know, how
14:50us as a community, as an umma, we, we often are pointing at people for not wearing a hijab,
14:56for, uh, not speaking Arabic, you know, all the stuff that isn't the foundation of Islam. It's not
15:03our, what is it called? Our five pillars. So he was just really focusing on us building a foundation,
15:09how it's better to be a sinning Muslim than not be a Muslim at all. You know, that it's better to
15:14be in here and repent and try to, and try to be better than, than for us to just be like, okay,
15:19well, I'm not good enough. So I'm not going to be Muslim, right? Cause we're never going to be
15:22good enough. Even as Muslim, you're never going to reach that point of like perfection. None of us
15:26will. Um, so he was just pretty much saying it's better to be here than not, you know, to focus on
15:32just baby steps that even if you convert and you're still drinking, it's better to be here and try to
15:38leave it, you know, little by little. And he was reminding us how, um, Islam was given in,
15:43in stages, you know, uh, the 23 years to two different stages and how the first half was just
15:51given for, for the people of that time to fall in love with the religion. And then it wasn't until
15:55the second half where the ruling started to come, you know, and that was amongst the best of our
16:00people with our prophet, peace be upon him. So imagine us with us that are so judgmental, um,
16:06our prophet, peace be upon him, he's not with us. Right. So it's obviously harder to try to connect
16:11in when the coupa was done, you know, we're all, I'm waiting for them cause they're the boys. So
16:15they're walking out on, on another side. And so I I'm waiting for them and they come out. And
16:19I just remember my husband telling me, I want to be Muslim. And I was like, what? Like in shock.
16:26Cause like I said, never in a million years did I think my husband was ever going to be Muslim.
16:31Like never, ever. So when he said that, like, I still remember it now and I get emotional,
16:37but I remember, you know, and I was just like, okay, I was like, you want to talk to the imam?
16:41And he's like, yeah. So we went back, we talked to the imam and he's like, okay. He's like, let's
16:46take your shahada right now. So he gathered a couple of people, you know, to, to witness him
16:50taking his shahada and he took it in front of our boys in front of me. And I don't think that anybody
16:56or only us as reverts, I think we can understand how impactful and how beautiful that is. So
17:02when I converted, it was like one of the best days of my life. And then when I saw my oldest
17:07son taking his shahada, I was like, I couldn't believe it. You know, I was beyond happy. And
17:14then obviously we were raising our middle or youngest son at the time. We just started
17:18raising him as, as a Muslim.
17:20How old was your son when, when you became Muslim?
17:23He was nine at the time. Oh, and he, I can't math.
17:27So you let him choose to become Muslim.
17:29Yes. Yep. Absolutely. I absolutely did. And, and even now that's one of the things that
17:33I tell them, like, if you ever don't want to be Muslim, it's because you researched it
17:38and something about it really told you that it wasn't right. But I did that before I left
17:42Catholicism. I still have books to this day about Catholicism because I didn't want to be
17:47Catholic because that's what my family was. I wanted to be Catholic because I chose to be
17:51Catholic. And obviously, ultimately I chose not to. So with my sons, I, we tell them the
17:56same thing. Like if you're Muslim, I don't want you to be Muslim because your parents were
17:59Muslim. I want you to be Muslim because you love the religion and you really love Islam,
18:04you know? So I let him choose. We let him choose. We told him, Hey, do you want to go
18:09to Sunday school so that you can learn? And he said, yes. And I was like, okay, don't feel
18:13pressured. I don't ever want you to feel pressured to be Muslim. And he said, he said, okay,
18:16not a problem. And like two months, I think after I converted, he chose to take his shahada
18:22at school at the Sunday school. Um, yeah. Do you remember what made him convert? Is
18:27that, is that, he kind of, he kind of told, he told us that it was just, he's like, it
18:31just makes sense, mom. He's like, it's just common sense. Everything that they're saying
18:35just makes perfect sense. And I told him, I was like, are you sure you want to be Muslim?
18:40Like, you don't have to, if you don't want to, he was like, mom, I'm sure I want to be
18:45Muslim. And I was like, are you sure? He was like, yes, I'm sure. And I was like, okay.
18:50I was like, don't do it for me, baby. And he's like, no, he's like, I really want to be
18:54Muslim. Yeah. So he took his shahada that, that day at Sunday school.
18:58Okay. So back to that moment where, where your husband also joined you guys.
19:02Yes. Oh my goodness. So I just remember seeing my son's faces, you know, having our children
19:09witness their father take his shahada. I can't even explain the feeling as a mother and as
19:15a wife, like to just see that moment and experience number one, my husband becoming Muslim. And
19:21then our sons witnessing that, like, it was just so beautiful. It's just so beautiful. I
19:26can't even explain it. You guys hug and embrace each other. Yes, of course. Yes, definitely.
19:30We were just beyond happy, beyond happy.
19:39And ģ“ė ź² saying it to me.
19:46He's grounded.
19:49You guys.
19:50Amen.
19:51Amen.
19:51Amen.
19:53Amen.
19:54Amen.
19:55Amen.
19:55Amen.
19:57Amen.
19:59Amen.
20:02Amen.
20:03Amen.
20:03Amen.
20:05Amen.
20:07Amen.
20:08Amen.
20:09Amen.
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