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#Stick Season 1 Episode 5

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:01Okay, tell me what you know about golf.
00:03Well, it's super boring and really bad for the environment.
00:07And it is played by rich white men who have a thing for zip-up pullovers.
00:11Okay, now hold on.
00:12Nothing marries style and comfort as effortlessly as the humble pullover.
00:17And don't roll your eyes, because your hoodie is a cousin to the pullover.
00:20And as for golf being boring, you're just dead wrong.
00:23Golf, when it's played well, is an exquisite game.
00:27Elegant, almost metaphysical.
00:29Golf can unlock the mysteries of the universe if you're open to it.
00:33I thought that rich white men already had a skeleton key to the mysteries of the universe.
00:37Can you unlock the mystery of why you have to have this conversation in here while I'm sleeping?
00:43Okay, we're gonna be quick. Listen, the basics.
00:45Each club is designed specifically for a particular challenge on the course.
00:50Your driver and your woods when you want to hit it far.
00:53Irons when you want to hit it a shorter distance.
00:55But why not just use one club and then, like, swing it less hard if you want to go shorter?
00:59Oh, yeah. Try and hit a 50-yard pitch over a bunker with a wood. See what happens.
01:04No, no. It's a fair question.
01:06The higher the loft angle on the clubface, the higher you're gonna hit it.
01:09The lower, the lower you're gonna hit it. Make sense?
01:12What's a clubface?
01:14Alright, just show her the fucking clubs.
01:16It's them. Show them the fucking clubs.
01:18No, it's her.
01:19I thought it was them.
01:20It is.
01:21You just said it was her.
01:22It is.
01:23Jesus, just show them and her the fucking clubs.
01:29Okay, this is the driver. Longest shaft, flat clubface, and this hits the ball far.
01:36At least it does with me.
01:40Whoa.
01:41It's cold out here.
01:43Because you're not wearing any pants.
01:45Can I get on with this, please?
01:47Yeah, yeah, but let's not gloss over the fact that you cannot hit the ball any better than that.
01:52In other words, I've pured it. Flushed it. That's something you might say.
01:56But moving on to the irons.
01:59You see the angled clubface? Now, as you go up the irons, you hit the ball shorter, but with more loft.
02:07Here, I'm gonna show you.
02:11Jesus, Mitz, did you see that?
02:13Where was that 20 years ago?
02:14Guys, woods go far. Irons go short. What's your point?
02:18My point is, Santi's gonna wanna club up. He's gonna wanna use a wood when he should be using an iron.
02:24Alright? He makes bad choices.
02:26Oh, that's rich coming from you.
02:28This whole plan is a bad choice.
02:30We wanna keep him out of trouble. Don't let him get into that negative loop.
02:34He doesn't listen to me. He listens to you.
02:36So when we need to dial him back in, you're gonna be my mouthpiece.
02:40I'm not okay with you using that word.
02:42Our Cyrano de Bergerac.
02:44Another way of saying it is, you're gonna be our zero-no de Bergerac.
02:48No, that's a rough pun. That's bad.
02:50That is a great pun. You're smiling a little bit.
02:53You're just golfing now, or what's happening?
02:59Yeah, he doesn't really hear people when he's in the zone.
03:02Yeah, I'm going inside.
03:03Turn the lights off when you're done.
03:07I've seen wind, and I've seen rain.
03:21If I'm confident in the casual presence of pain.
03:28Cause you know I know, it ain't over.
03:34Some ways it has not begun.
03:39Then you look over your shoulder.
03:42And it's gone, ooh.
04:00Welcome to the local qualifier for this year's US Amateur Championship.
04:05The format is 36 holes of stroke play over two days,
04:09with the top two golfers advancing to the final qualifier
04:13at Forest Dunes Golf Club in Roscommon, Missouri.
04:17Best of luck.
04:23Driver. Four iron. Three wood. Play the left. To the right. Go for it.
04:31You're massaging Mitz's balls.
04:34Hey, Zero, I'm serious.
04:36I know what it means. It means lay it up, okay?
04:37I'm just fucking with you.
04:38Okay, but it's just going to be the two of you out there.
04:40I can't go out there, so I need you to check in with me on every single shot.
04:44Especially on holes.
04:46Five, nine, eleven, seventeen.
04:47Yes, especially on eleven.
04:49Now there's a bunker called the Copacabana.
04:51That may sound like a good thing, it's not a good thing.
04:53He's going to want to fly it with the...
04:55Fluid.
04:56We want him to use...
04:57The five iron.
04:58Good. And things are fluid. I understand.
05:00Things are going to change out there.
05:02We just want to keep him out of trouble.
05:04Play safe.
05:05We don't want to flip that switch where he starts seeing red,
05:08because then we can't get him back.
05:09There he is.
05:10Hey, how you doing, big dog?
05:11Don't call me big dog.
05:12Copy that.
05:13You ready?
05:14Yeah, let's do it.
05:15Nice.
05:17Now on the tee from New Haven, Connecticut, Tom Caruso.
05:31Nice!
05:32Mashed potatoes through jackalackers!
05:34I hate golf balls.
05:36Yeah, they get worse every year.
05:39Now on the tee from Fort Wayne, Indiana, Santiago Wheeler.
05:44Okay, here we go.
05:52BABABOOL!
05:53Lincoln!
06:10I think I'm going to use a five.
06:14Here we go.
06:19Oh!
06:31Princeton's going for the green.
06:32I'm going to hit my three wood.
06:34If he can get it to the green from there, I can get it from here.
06:37Yeah, for sure.
06:38But he's a yoked-up alpha bro
06:42with Chinese characters tattooed on his heart.
06:44So if you feel the need to compete with that, please.
06:46Do you have a better idea?
06:48I mean, you're the golf expert.
06:50What's a smart play?
06:52Five iron.
06:53Lay it short of the sand.
06:55So play it smart.
06:56He's not.
06:58There we go.
07:03Oh!
07:04Oh, a smart player.
07:09This could be good.
07:10You think?
07:11They were a complete stranger two days ago,
07:13and now she's catty.
07:15Your pronouns are all over the place.
07:17Look, I'm not going to play this
07:18who's on first game with the pronouns.
07:20If that person were playing a major role in my kid's life,
07:22I want a little more information, that's all.
07:24Do you know her last name?
07:25Their last name.
07:27And no, I don't.
07:28See? That's what I'm saying.
07:29Kids are like a fucking mystery.
07:31They don't talk about themselves.
07:33It's always some agenda, like, you know,
07:35animal enslavement or methane gas or the patriarchy.
07:40So you think that zero is, like, the Tinder Swindler?
07:43I don't know who the fuck that is, but I know something sketchy when I see it.
07:47I don't know who the fuck that is, but I don't know who the fuck is.
07:55Yes!
07:56Yes!
07:57Yes!
07:58Yes!
07:59Yes!
08:00Yes!
08:01Yes!
08:02Yes!
08:03Yes!
08:04Yes!
08:05Yes!
08:06Yes!
08:07Yes!
08:08What's going on?
08:09What's wrong with you?
08:10I keep trying to tell you you're playing with fire.
08:12All right?
08:13But fuck me.
08:14You still think this is a bad idea?
08:16You don't care what I think.
08:17I tell you to zig and you zag, and then when shit goes sideways,
08:20I gotta try to fix it, man.
08:22What are you talking about?
08:23This side hustle you got going with Zero and the kid,
08:26I mean, you don't think about the consequences of your shit,
08:29and then I gotta pick up the pieces.
08:31What pieces?
08:32Everything's working.
08:33He's first on the leaderboard.
08:35Look!
08:36If he keeps playing like this, he'll move on to the final qualifier.
08:38You know what?
08:39You're gonna do what you wanna do.
08:41I don't even know why I'm wasting my breath.
08:53Your music library is, like, all over the place.
08:56You got some ACDC Chinopacas fucking Hamilton.
09:01Oh, no.
09:02Whoa.
09:03What can I say?
09:04I'm eclectic.
09:05Yeah.
09:06I mean, if I was gonna profile you based on your music library,
09:09you were either, like, a theater kid who raps all his solos,
09:12or, like, a Russian bot trying to sing humans.
09:15Or you could profile me as a guy who finished number one on the leaderboard today,
09:18a.k.a. El Ganador, a.k.a. the greatest of all time.
09:22Whoa!
09:23Oh, my God.
09:24The bot's getting cocky.
09:25So what do we blame for you if you drop down the leaderboard?
09:28I won't drop down.
09:30But what if you do?
09:31If you're not number one, you don't exist.
09:33You don't exist?
09:35Wow, okay.
09:36That's a lot to unpack there.
09:37Who taught you that?
09:38My old coach.
09:40Okay, let me see your phone.
09:42Okay.
09:43I'm guessing there's lots of songs about life as a nomad.
09:45What's that supposed to mean?
09:47Well, you said you haven't lived in a place longer than three months.
09:49That makes you a nomad.
09:51Isn't that hard?
09:52Like, moving around so much?
09:54Not really.
09:55I mean, I move on when I, like, get bored.
09:58You know, I need to be challenged.
10:01Hmm.
10:02Wait.
10:03Flock of clocks demo.
10:05I need an explanation.
10:06No, no, no, no.
10:07That's, that's...
10:08I was in a band.
10:09I was very young.
10:10It's very bad.
10:11Give me...
10:12Wait, wait.
10:13No, I don't want to listen to this.
10:14I'm so listening to this.
10:15Wait.
10:16Stop, stop.
10:17Both of you.
10:18Mami, calma.
10:19We're just messing around.
10:20Tomorrow you have a big day.
10:22You need to rest.
10:23And Zero, I need help with the laundry.
10:26Yeah, I'll be at home.
10:28Give me my phone.
10:30I will hear that song.
10:32Mm-mm.
10:33Never fought.
10:37Nomad.
10:45Zero, what's your last name?
10:47Duffy.
10:48Why?
10:49Zero's an interesting name.
10:51Well, I was born Christina Marie Duffy.
10:55December 4th, 2005, Marion County Hospital, Lexington, Kentucky.
10:58You want my, uh, social security or an emergency contact?
11:02Am I that obvious?
11:03Yeah, kind.
11:04No, I'm sorry.
11:05I just...
11:06I realized that I know nothing about you.
11:08No, I, I get it.
11:09I'm gonna be living with you guys for a few weeks.
11:11Go ahead.
11:12Ask me anything.
11:13Okay.
11:14Your parents.
11:15Keith and Lila.
11:16Mm-hmm.
11:17Keith is a career marine.
11:18Lila was an artist.
11:20She wasn't around.
11:21Oh.
11:22Yeah, it was just me and my dad.
11:23So how did your dad react to you being...
11:26A genderqueer, anti-capitalist, postcolonial feminist?
11:29Mm-hmm.
11:30Better than you would think.
11:32So did I pass?
11:34I wasn't a test.
11:35Hmm.
11:36No, I just wanted to know more about you.
11:38Now that you're one of us.
11:44Okay.
11:45Now my turn.
11:47Did Price really give you a hundred grand?
11:50Oh, he sure did.
11:51Oh, my God.
11:52You're a legend.
11:53What are you gonna do with it?
11:54Invest it.
11:56I have an idea.
11:57Niche commodity.
11:58Some supply constraints could lead to big gains, if I'm right.
12:01Yeah.
12:02I was a business major before Santi was born.
12:04You know, to be honest, I'm not usually a proponent of corporate greed, but...
12:08Holy shit, you're a she-bull.
12:10Are you calling me a cow?
12:11No.
12:12I'm calling you a fearless, risk-seeking motherfucking she-bull.
12:17I don't know what that means.
12:19But I like it.
12:22Welcome to day two of the US amateur qualifier.
12:25Now on the tee, our first-round leader, Santiago Wheeler.
12:38Fast potatoes!
12:40You said that yesterday, man.
12:42Hell yeah, you're right.
12:44By the way, Zero's last name is Duffy.
12:47We had a lovely chat last night.
12:49And they're not sketchy at all.
12:50They're sweet and thoughtful and excellent at folding laundry.
12:53And they called me a she-bull.
12:55Mm.
12:56Still don't trust them.
12:57Her.
12:58Them.
12:59Yeah.
13:09You know, I could fly those trees, eagle, and then this thing right now.
13:13Or you could mess up, drop out at first, and then you wouldn't exist.
13:21Okay.
13:22Atta girl.
13:24Atta person.
13:30Hey, hey, hey.
13:31Hey, hey, hey.
13:32What? That's so sweet.
13:34You're carrying my son's clubs.
13:35You need to stay hydrated.
13:36Oh, Santi's killing it, huh?
13:38Yes.
13:39Thank God.
13:40I was stressed going into this.
13:41Last time he was in a real tournament, it wasn't great.
13:44What happened?
13:45Well, his dad happened.
13:47Yeah, but he's not worth even talking about.
13:49Oh, come on.
13:50I gave you my whole life story last night.
13:52Spill it.
13:53Santi's dad is what you call an asshole.
13:55Mm.
13:56What kind?
13:57The asshole spectrum has many varieties.
13:58The kind that showers a kid with love and attention when they're playing good,
14:02and takes it away when they're not.
14:04Gary was always manipulating Santi, and Santi never knew if what his dad said was real,
14:08or just some mind game to get him to do whatever he wanted on the course.
14:11So, yeah.
14:12It's good to see him playing without all that kata.
14:16You know?
14:19Yeah.
14:20All right.
14:21Back at the Copa.
14:23I'm in the lead.
14:24I birdie it here.
14:25I bury that guy.
14:26Let's have a little fun.
14:27Whoa, whoa.
14:28What's he doing?
14:29Yeah, you know what?
14:30Fuck it.
14:31Bury him.
14:32Whoa, whoa, whoa.
14:33What's happening?
14:34You're being shaken off.
14:35No, no, that's okay.
14:36It's fine.
14:37I don't need the joystick every shot.
14:39He's an athlete.
14:40If he's feeling it.
14:41He can clear this no problem.
14:43No problem.
14:44Oh, come on.
14:45Man, come on.
14:46I'm company.
14:47It's a stay.
14:48I'm company.
14:49All really, I'm company.
14:50No problem.
14:51Who are you?
14:52You're not?
14:53I'm company.
14:54Oh, my God.
14:55You're not.
14:56You're not.
14:57You're not.
14:58Yeah.
14:59Come on.
15:00Let's have a little fun.
15:01Whoa, whoa.
15:02What's he doing?
15:03It's okay.
15:12No big deal.
15:19Shit.
15:30Holy four-putt, Batman.
15:32Man, that dude just double-bogey.
15:33Administer the Heimlich because he's choking.
15:36Okay, both bros.
15:37Yeah.
15:38Nobody likes you.
15:42I mean, I think some people like us.
15:44She can't know that.
15:45There's no way she can possibly know that.
15:49Can I talk to you for a minute?
15:50Yeah.
15:53What happened on 11?
15:54Did you not see me?
15:55I was signaling four-ire.
15:57Yeah, well, you wanted to use the three-word.
15:58Who am I to disagree?
15:59The person whose job it is to disagree when the situation calls for it.
16:03Well, I'm not super into my job at the moment.
16:05What is it with your generation being into their jobs?
16:08I mean, do you think the guys that de-ice airplanes are into it?
16:10Standing out there in the freezing cold, blowing hot chemicals out of a hose?
16:14Maybe I didn't want to add to Santi's trauma by pulling strings behind his back.
16:18What trauma?
16:19That word has been so watered down by TikTok.
16:22Look, Elena told me that Santi's dad was, like, super manipulative, and it really fucked with his head.
16:26And that's exactly what we're doing.
16:27We're manipulating him.
16:28No, no, no.
16:29Manipulative's a negative word.
16:31We're trying to help him succeed.
16:34What even is success to you?
16:35Like money and cars and shit?
16:37What?
16:37No, it's his game.
16:38His potential.
16:39The very things that his dad stole from him.
16:42We can give it back to him.
16:43I like him.
16:47I like him, too.
16:49I don't want to lie to him.
16:50Zara, you don't have to.
16:52You just have to help him.
16:53Okay, help me help him.
16:55I don't know if I can.
16:57I promise you can.
16:58It's all going to come down to the 17th hole.
17:00If he doesn't birdie that, we are out of it for good.
17:03He won't be able to qualify for the U.S. Amateur.
17:06The plan is over, and we all just go home.
17:09Zara, please listen to me.
17:10I can't do it without you.
17:12There's a pond on the left side of the fairway.
17:14He's going to want to try to carry that,
17:16because he takes every water hazard as a dare.
17:19He doesn't need to.
17:20He can just lay up to the right and go around
17:22and get his birdie that way.
17:23But if he ends up in the pond, we're finished.
17:26Come on, please.
17:27Stick with me.
17:31Okay, let me get my three wood.
17:32I'm going to go over.
17:36No, trust me, I got it.
17:38Give him a seven.
17:39Remember when I told you that I move on
17:43when I don't feel challenged?
17:44It's not true.
17:46I move on when I don't feel safe.
17:48I get, like, antsy and insecure,
17:51and I just completely bug out.
17:52And, I mean, if you don't qualify, I lose my job.
17:56And honestly, I...
17:58I'd like to keep it.
18:00Because I feel safe with you.
18:04With all of you.
18:07I'm not ready to move on.
18:13I'm not ready for you to move on either.
18:15He's hitting seven.
18:16Guys, he's hitting seven.
18:18It's called thinking your way around the course.
18:20We're going to like that.
18:49I'm not ready for you to move on either way around the course.
18:51Yes!
18:52Yes!
18:53Yes!
18:55It's still rolling!
19:04Get in the hole!
19:11Come on!
19:14Come on!
19:14Come on!
19:15Come on!
19:16Come on!
19:16Come on!
19:17Come on!
19:18Come on!
19:19Come on!
19:20Come on!
19:21Come on!
19:22Come on!
19:23Come on!
19:24Come on!
19:25I get it now!
19:26Get what?
19:27Exquisite!
19:28I told you so!
19:29Come on!
19:30Come on!
19:31Come on!
19:32Come on!
19:33Come on!
19:34Come on!
19:35Come on!
19:36Come on!
19:37Come on!
19:39And then an eagle on 17.
19:41Are you kidding me?
19:42Come on!
19:43Come on!
19:44Come on!
19:45Come on!
19:46Come on!
19:47Come on!
19:48Come on!
19:49Come on!
19:50Come on!
19:51Come on!
19:52Come on!
19:53Come on!
19:54Come on!
19:55Come on!
19:56Come on!
19:57God damn it.
19:59I told you to knock it off.
20:08Fuck.
20:11Hey.
20:13Hey, Mitch.
20:14Hey, so I guess this is because the plan with Zero is actually going pretty well?
20:19No, that ain't it.
20:19Yeah, you said to Zig, but I zagged, and zagged worked, and now you're pissed.
20:24Yeah, fuck off, Price.
20:25No, no, why can't you just admit shit didn't go sideways?
20:28You don't have to pick up the pieces.
20:30Yeah, not yet.
20:30There's time, though, pal.
20:32He just eagled 17 to win the qualifier.
20:36That's a good thing.
20:37That's why we came on this trip.
20:39Yeah, that's not why I came.
20:42Then why did you come on it?
20:44Because it seems to be my fucking job, whether I like it or not,
20:48to hover over you and try to protect you from yourself.
20:51Protect me?
20:52I feel great.
20:53Stop protecting me.
20:54Look, I wish you could see it the way I see it, all right?
20:57But you can't because you're cut off from reality.
21:00You can't see what this is really about, Price.
21:03What is this really about?
21:06It's about Jet.
21:09I mean, he would be about Santi's age now.
21:11You realize that, right?
21:13This whole fucking thing is not about golf.
21:15It's about all this shit you never dealt with.
21:17Tell me what dealing with it looks like.
21:19Do I have to put on a little show for everyone and talk about it every day and process it?
21:23Yeah, then no.
21:24I'm not going to deal with it.
21:26Look, I was in the hospital with you for over a year.
21:29I was around when he died.
21:30I was there when you lost your fucking mind.
21:33And then you just stuck your head in the dirt.
21:35You can't even say his name, Price.
21:38And that's weird.
21:40I don't need to say his name.
21:42I hear it all the time.
21:45And you want to talk about weird?
21:46We're riding around in Francine's sarcophagus, okay?
21:50But I'm supposed to take advice from you about processing greed.
21:53That's a little fucking out of line.
21:54No, no, no.
21:54It's like stepping into a pharaoh's tomb with all this shit for the afterlife.
21:58If pharaohs were into needlepoint.
22:03What was that?
22:04Processing it?
22:06Yeah, process it some more.
22:07Show me how to process it.
22:11You push me again, and I'm going to start processing it.
22:14Yeah, really?
22:14Yeah, really.
22:19Get it off.
22:22No more pushing.
22:25Fine.
22:31All right, look, man.
22:32When you guys lost Jet,
22:34I seriously thought you were going to off yourself.
22:36All right?
22:38You didn't.
22:39And eventually you came back.
22:41And you just acted like nothing happened.
22:43I accepted that because you were okay.
22:45And you're not great.
22:46I know, and so what?
22:48I mean, after Francine, you disappeared into the woods.
22:50And I didn't know if you were going to make it.
22:52But here we are.
22:54You know, we're getting through it.
22:56But, Mitz, what is so bad about this?
23:07Come on.
23:08You've put everything you've got into this kid.
23:11And I'm just nervous.
23:13If it goes sideways,
23:14I don't know if you'll come back this time.
23:18I don't know if you can handle it.
23:19That's why you came.
23:23And I appreciate it.
23:27I know you're looking out for me.
23:29I need it.
23:30It's my job.
23:31I'm your caddy.
23:31I know, you're my caddy.
23:35And you give me advice,
23:36and tell me what you see,
23:38where the traps are, how to play it.
23:40But you know at a certain point,
23:42I have to take the swing.
23:43That's the way it works, right?
23:44That's the way it works.
23:45So let me take the swing.
23:47Let me help this kid.
23:49And I don't know if it's a good play or a bad play,
23:52but I want, I need to do it.
23:55And I need you.
23:57I literally can't do this without your help.
24:06Okay.
24:09I'm sorry about the picture frame.
24:11I don't worry about it.
24:12I hated that picture.
24:13I thought I looked haggard in it,
24:15but Francine liked it because her neck looked good.
24:17I don't know.
24:17No, he looked great.
24:19He looked handsome.
24:20Well, that's very kind of you,
24:22and you're, you're totally not fucked up.
24:27That's why we work.
24:32Yeah, yeah.
24:33Oh, fuck.
24:34Oh, fuck.
24:41I want to see you, yeah.
24:53I'm begging you, please, to come home.
25:00See you, yeah.
25:02You're breaking my heart.
25:05You're shaking my confidence, baby.
25:09What's the scene, yeah?
25:12I'm begging you, please, to come home.
25:17I'm making love in the afternoon.
25:25It's a cigar up in my bedroom.
25:29I want to wash my face.
25:34When I go back to bed, someone's taking my place.
25:40See you, yeah.
25:42You're breaking my heart.
25:44You're shaking my confidence, baby.
25:49What's the scene, yeah?
25:51I'm down on my knees.
25:54I'm begging you, please, to come home.
25:58Come home home.
25:59Go, go, go, go, go.
26:03Go, go, go, go, go.
26:05Go, go, go, go, go.
26:06Go, go, go, go, go, go.
26:37All right, we got to do a toast here to Santi.
26:39I mean, one minute, you're working at the frozen food section of the Decatur Market.
26:45The next minute, he's winning golf tournaments left and right.
26:48Next stop, U.S. Amateur.
26:50Cheers.
26:50Cheers.
26:52It's late.
26:54We got to go to the hotel.
26:55We're heading out at 6.
26:57You sure you want to drive over there and back in the morning?
27:00What are the options?
27:01Well, you can crash here.
27:03You can take the big bed, Price and I will take the bunks, and we'll kick these kids out into the wilderness.
27:08Camping?
27:08Yeah, I mean, I've got sweeping bags, I've got pads, you can set up on the roof, stare at the stars, be the best night of sweep you ever had.
27:15Mommy, can't we?
27:20Let's do it.
27:20All right, Santi, grab dessert, I'll get the gear.
27:24Bye.
27:34There's this big thing on the roof.
27:36Look at that.
27:37What?
27:38I don't know.
27:39It's like, is that a star?
27:41Or is that the moon?
27:42I'm not.
27:42Shit.
27:44Don't.
27:45Oh, my God.
28:06Oh, my God.
28:09Oh.
28:11Oh, my God.
28:41Oh, my God.
29:11Oh, my God.
29:41Oh, my God.
30:11Oh, my God.