Good Girls Gone Wild ReelShort
Welcome to Hairashow on Dailymotion! Dive into intense stories packed with drama, action, and unforgettable characters. From high-stakes city showdowns to emotional rollercoasters, each short film brings a unique, captivating journey where fearless characters face off against tough challenges, rivals, and dark forces. Subscribe to stay tuned for every twist, thrilling showdown, and heart-stopping moment—all right here!
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Welcome to Hairashow on Dailymotion! Dive into intense stories packed with drama, action, and unforgettable characters. From high-stakes city showdowns to emotional rollercoasters, each short film brings a unique, captivating journey where fearless characters face off against tough challenges, rivals, and dark forces. Subscribe to stay tuned for every twist, thrilling showdown, and heart-stopping moment—all right here!
#shortdrama #shortfilm #shortfilms #filmengsub #movieengsub #reedshort #haibarashow #chinesedrama #englishsubstitle #chinesedramaengsub #moviehot #romance #movieengsub
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Oh, bad.
00:00:30Hello?
00:00:31Cheryl, we have to talk about our birthday plans.
00:00:34I mean, it's only two days away,
00:00:35and we still haven't decided the perfect way to celebrate.
00:00:38So I was thinking maybe we could all take a trip to...
00:00:42Me too.
00:00:43Um, I meant to tell you before, but I wanted to be sure.
00:00:46Um, I think I'm going to spend my birthday with Jake.
00:00:49Uh, I'm going to lose my virginity to him.
00:00:52You know, I want to surprise him.
00:00:54What? But you can't.
00:00:56I mean, I thought we were going to wait until marriage.
00:00:59Besides, you can't do that to us.
00:01:01You can't break tradition that way.
00:01:04This is bad.
00:01:06You know, I'm going to tell Lexi.
00:01:07She's going to be very unhappy about this.
00:01:16Come on, Lexi.
00:01:18So girls, what are we going to do for our birthday?
00:01:33Sue, we have plenty of time to figure something out.
00:01:38But this is the big 1-8.
00:01:40I mean, every year since our mom's met in the hospital,
00:01:42we've done something new and special,
00:01:44but this has to be newer and more special.
00:01:47So what's something we've never done before?
00:01:49Mushrooms?
00:01:51No, not like that.
00:01:52Like something nice.
00:01:54Like maybe a trip.
00:01:56Like a mushroom trip?
00:01:57No.
00:01:59Sorry, Sue.
00:02:00I have a date.
00:02:02So do I.
00:02:04Sorry, Sue.
00:02:05Don't worry, Sue.
00:02:06We'll figure it out.
00:02:19Oh, flowers.
00:02:20Are these from you?
00:02:21Yeah, sure.
00:02:22Here you go.
00:02:24No card, but I thought I saw one.
00:02:27I didn't know how to put my feelings into words.
00:02:30I guess you still make me nervous.
00:02:35Oh, Jake.
00:02:40Maybe I should come in and hang out for a minute.
00:02:43No, Jake.
00:02:44Not yet.
00:02:45When we do it, I want it to be really special.
00:02:47The best night of my life.
00:02:49It will be.
00:02:50I promise.
00:02:51It will always be amazing.
00:02:53With you and me.
00:02:54Together.
00:03:03Jake, no.
00:03:04I have to go.
00:03:05I have to work on my art project.
00:03:07You know, I thought art was going to be a really easy elective,
00:03:10but I guess I should have taken more math.
00:03:14So you're going to come to my birthday, okay?
00:03:16This Saturday?
00:03:17Of course.
00:03:21Thanks.
00:03:22Okay.
00:03:23Bye.
00:03:24Nothing.
00:03:25Nothing.
00:03:26Nothing.
00:03:27Oh, baby.
00:03:28You're so hot.
00:03:29I'm going to do you so good.
00:03:30Oh, yeah, baby.
00:03:31Yeah.
00:03:32What was your name again?
00:03:33Rod.
00:03:34Sex guy.
00:03:35Lexi is so upset, she's speechless.
00:03:36You're right, I bet.
00:03:40Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday?
00:03:41Oh, no.
00:03:42Does not compute.
00:03:43Want to talk in person ASAP.
00:03:44Oh, huh.
00:03:45Oh, huh.
00:03:46Hi.
00:03:50Hi.
00:03:55Hi.
00:03:5600.
00:04:12Oh, huh. Hi.
00:04:15When did you get home?
00:04:17So is it true?
00:04:18Yes, it is.
00:04:20It's just, it's the right time and Jake's the right man.
00:04:24I mean, he's handsome and smart and wealthy
00:04:29and he has a really bright future ahead of him.
00:04:31So I just think it's the right time.
00:04:34Lexi, tell her, losing our virginity is one of those milestones we should all face together.
00:04:39On our birthday, yes, but not on this birthday.
00:04:41Like, maybe on our 23rd birthday or maybe even like our 28th, maybe.
00:04:49Listen, guys, I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:04:56I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:05:05That's Cheryl. Sue is right.
00:05:07We do always do something special on our birthday.
00:05:09Oh, does Jake really have such a tiny little needle dip?
00:05:14It's not Jake.
00:05:16It's the male ideal.
00:05:18Like, a Greek god or Sue's dad.
00:05:22Right.
00:05:23Oh, yeah, I guess you're right.
00:05:26I mean, it kind of sucks.
00:05:27I'm not really an artist.
00:05:28Girls, can you just stop changing the subject?
00:05:31The point is, we should all lose our virginities together on the same day.
00:05:34And I'm just not ready yet.
00:05:36I'm waiting for a sign.
00:05:38And then I'll know it's right.
00:05:39Look, I can go either way.
00:05:42I mean, I'm fine with just 69, 79, anal.
00:05:46I don't feel any rush to actually do the deed.
00:05:49Besides, I know it'll never live up to my rabbit anyway.
00:05:52But if you want to do it this year, then maybe we all should.
00:05:58You know, it could be like our big 18th birthday thing.
00:06:04Where are you going at 6.30 in the morning?
00:06:07To church to pray for you.
00:06:09Want to be first in line.
00:06:12I'm getting some sleep.
00:06:13Yeah, me too.
00:06:14Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
00:06:25It has been four days since my last confession.
00:06:27I accused myself of the following sins.
00:06:32Okay, so I'm really embarrassed to talk about this, but...
00:06:35It's about sex.
00:06:39I mean, not me.
00:06:41I've never gone past second base with a guy.
00:06:44I've never even seen a guy's...
00:06:47Well, there was that one time I took the pants off my Ken doll.
00:06:50But I was dressing him up as Jesus, and I wanted to see his thing.
00:06:54But there was nothing there.
00:06:58Okay, so it's about my friends.
00:07:00My best friends.
00:07:02They're going to do something really bad this weekend.
00:07:04Okay.
00:07:06Third base.
00:07:07What?
00:07:08No.
00:07:09Like, sex.
00:07:10Like, intercourse?
00:07:12With boys, they barely even know.
00:07:14I mean, they really need us intervention, if you know what I mean.
00:07:17All the way.
00:07:18Go all the way.
00:07:20What?
00:07:20What?
00:07:21What?
00:07:21What?
00:07:23Ah!
00:07:24Ah!
00:07:25How could you do so?
00:07:27You're a bad, bad person.
00:07:31What?
00:07:33Ah!
00:07:38Yes!
00:07:38Yes!
00:07:39Run!
00:07:40Run!
00:07:40Home route!
00:07:44Damn it!
00:07:46Fuckin' Yankees.
00:07:49Sorry.
00:07:50Sorry.
00:07:50Sue, it is 1 p.m.
00:08:14What do you have, a little consideration?
00:08:16I'm trying to sleep.
00:08:17Geez, can you guys please keep it down?
00:08:22I have an announcement to make.
00:08:24I want to do it.
00:08:26Do you hear me?
00:08:27I want to do it.
00:08:29This weekend, on our birthday.
00:08:32Do what?
00:08:34It.
00:08:35Screw.
00:08:36Screwing, boning, making the beast with two backs, you know, shagging, fucking.
00:08:44You do.
00:08:45Uh, but what about all your religious stuff, and what about your sign from heaven?
00:08:50Oh, I got a sign, at church.
00:08:52Really?
00:08:53Well, okay, great.
00:08:56We're all in then.
00:08:58So we'll have a big pool party, and we'll do it there.
00:09:02Right?
00:09:03I'll start making the shopping list.
00:09:08Hey, Frank.
00:09:09Hi, Sue.
00:09:10Guys, we didn't invite Frank to the party.
00:09:12I don't know, do you think he'd even have fun?
00:09:13Yeah.
00:09:14He's blind.
00:09:15Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:09:19Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:09:20Hey.
00:09:21Um, I was wondering, we're throwing this party tomorrow night.
00:09:24It's for our birthdays.
00:09:25Do you want to come?
00:09:26Do you think he can see up my shorts?
00:09:27I don't know.
00:09:28I don't know.
00:09:29I don't know.
00:09:30I don't know.
00:09:31I don't know.
00:09:32I don't know.
00:09:33I don't know.
00:09:34I don't know.
00:09:35I don't know.
00:09:36I don't know.
00:09:37Do you think he'd even have fun?
00:09:38Yeah.
00:09:39He's blind.
00:09:40Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:09:42Do you want to see up my shorts?
00:09:54Well, my house looks done.
00:09:57Tomorrow's the big day.
00:09:59We finally turn 18.
00:10:00And finally lose our virginity.
00:10:03Well, we better get our beady sleep,
00:10:04because the party starts tomorrow at 2.
00:10:06So, OK, we know who Cheryl's going to do it with, Jake.
00:10:09And I'll probably do that guy, Rod.
00:10:12But, Sue, who are you going to pick?
00:10:13To pop your cherry?
00:10:15It's easy.
00:10:16I've known for the past six years, ever since catechism.
00:10:21What the fuck is catechism?
00:10:22I think it's a baby panda wrapped in peanut butter.
00:10:24Yeah.
00:10:33My soulmate.
00:10:37Chris?
00:10:38Sue, you, um, might want to think
00:10:41about picking a backup.
00:10:42I mean, what?
00:10:43No, Chris is perfect.
00:10:45He played Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar last year at camp.
00:10:48Plus, his name's Chris.
00:10:49It's a sign.
00:10:50Sue, the only sign is that Chris has a major case of gay face.
00:10:55What?
00:10:56He does not.
00:10:57Anyway, there's no such thing as gay face.
00:10:59He looks just like Justin Bieber.
00:11:01With a little bit of Zac Efron and just a hint of Ryan Seacrest.
00:11:05Who the fuck's Ryan Seacrest?
00:11:07Look, Chris is my soulmate.
00:11:10Okay, well, sweet dreams.
00:11:12See you in the morning.
00:11:14I knew it would happen someday.
00:11:18I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.
00:11:25I knew it would happen.
00:11:27Susan.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29Come on.
00:11:29Come.
00:11:32Come on.
00:11:32How the fuck's Ryan.
00:11:34I knew it would happen.
00:11:35Come on.
00:11:36Come on.
00:11:37Come on.
00:11:39Come on.
00:11:40Come on.
00:11:41Come on.
00:11:42Come on.
00:11:44Come on.
00:11:46Come on.
00:11:47You're so perfect.
00:12:17You knew that's what I look like.
00:12:47Too bad no one could ever compare to you.
00:13:03Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:17Oh my gosh.
00:13:27They're coming.
00:13:28Lexi, Cheryl, hurry.
00:13:33Ew, why?
00:13:35It's for Jake to unwrap me.
00:13:36It's going to be really sexy.
00:13:38I'm going to start.
00:13:39You're going to die of asphyxiation.
00:13:41He's going to be really sexy.
00:13:43It's stupid.
00:13:44Just screw him.
00:13:45That's what he wants.
00:13:46That's what all guys want.
00:13:47Who hurt you as a child?
00:13:49Oh, Christ.
00:13:50I don't have your mouth, too.
00:13:52Anyway, what guys want is someone who's sexy,
00:13:55not someone they can just have sex with.
00:13:57You're an idiot.
00:13:58A very smooth, plastic-wrapped idiot.
00:14:03Guys, seriously, come on.
00:14:04Hurry up.
00:14:09Oh, what a cool bracelet.
00:14:11I love it.
00:14:14You should put that down low because it's like,
00:14:16it's really...
00:14:16It's very fragile.
00:14:17Yeah.
00:14:18Okay.
00:14:18Set it down.
00:14:20Hurry up.
00:14:23Those were your anal beads, right?
00:14:24Yeah.
00:14:25Okay.
00:14:25Let's go.
00:14:25Oh, we're going to have some fun.
00:14:38Oh, Attack of the Wet T-shirts.
00:14:52Nice.
00:14:52Nice.
00:14:53Nice.
00:15:02Happy birthday, Lex.
00:15:05Oh, Joanna, we said no gifts.
00:15:07That is lip poison to plump your lips,
00:15:10but be careful it stings.
00:15:11And the other one is edible micellar joy.
00:15:15Oh, how did you know?
00:15:16I mean, I'm going to use both of these tonight.
00:15:24Poster, such a cutie.
00:15:27Please don't touch my service time.
00:15:29All right.
00:15:29Sorry.
00:15:30Are you okay now?
00:15:31Yeah, I'm fine.
00:15:32I can't believe you haven't heard of it.
00:15:38This is crazy.
00:15:39Oh, my God.
00:15:39Jake.
00:15:40Hi.
00:15:41Hey, babe.
00:15:43Happy birthday.
00:15:45Oh, you didn't have to give me anything.
00:15:48What?
00:15:49You want a beer?
00:15:53No.
00:15:55Oh, hon.
00:15:58Yeah.
00:16:01I have your present here.
00:16:03I'll give it to you later.
00:16:04The time's right.
00:16:06You didn't have to give me anything.
00:16:09And I have a present for you that I want you to unwrap later.
00:16:14Hey, bro.
00:16:16We need you to settle this bed over here real quick.
00:16:19A little bit.
00:16:22All right.
00:16:23This is my man right here.
00:16:25Hey.
00:16:25Hey.
00:16:26How you doing?
00:16:27Hey.
00:16:36Check it out.
00:16:39Dare me?
00:16:43Woo-hoo!
00:16:50Look at the girls.
00:16:51Look at the girls.
00:16:52Oh, dude.
00:16:56Look at those.
00:16:57Are those real?
00:16:58I don't...
00:16:58Have you guys seen Cheryl?
00:16:59Hey!
00:17:00Ah, dude, move!
00:17:01Come on, lame!
00:17:02Oh, all right.
00:17:03Okay.
00:17:04I'll see you guys later.
00:17:05Go do some push-ups or something.
00:17:06Oh, the moves.
00:17:0720 bucks says, by the end of the day, I will be motorboating those kitties.
00:17:11Yeah!
00:17:13They're fake anyways.
00:17:14Who cares?
00:17:16Okay.
00:17:20Oh, dude, dude.
00:17:21I'm blind, you fucking asshole.
00:17:23Sue, no, it's your birthday.
00:17:28Here, let me.
00:17:29Joanna, no.
00:17:29Just go enjoy the birdie.
00:17:31Come on.
00:17:33Open.
00:17:36Hey.
00:17:37Do my lips look any plumper?
00:17:38I put this stuff on, but I can't really feel anything yet.
00:17:43Have you guys seen Jake?
00:17:44I haven't seen him anywhere.
00:17:45It just, like, disappeared.
00:17:46Are these real?
00:17:59Of course they are.
00:18:02How come I've never met you before?
00:18:04I don't know.
00:18:05Maybe he's going to be around.
00:18:06Ryan, have you seen Jake?
00:18:07Um, I think he's around or something.
00:18:10Maybe upstairs.
00:18:11I don't know.
00:18:13Maybe you want to go get my birthday present.
00:18:15That's probably where he went.
00:18:17The girl.
00:18:20Liquid courage?
00:18:22Yeah.
00:18:23Atta girl.
00:18:27Vodka cranberry?
00:18:28Surely simple.
00:18:31Well, I guess it's now or never.
00:18:33I can go meet her.
00:18:35Sue?
00:18:36Are you okay?
00:18:37Sue?
00:18:38Relax.
00:18:40They're just nice.
00:18:42Okay, nothing to be scared of.
00:18:43Seriously.
00:18:43It's going to be fine.
00:18:45Is Chris here?
00:18:51Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:18:54No.
00:18:54He does not have gatefakes.
00:18:56I'm going to prove it to you.
00:18:58I'm going to do it.
00:19:04Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:19:07No.
00:19:07He does not have gatefakes.
00:19:10I'm going to prove it to you.
00:19:10I'm going to do it.
00:19:12I'm going to do this.
00:19:14Good luck.
00:19:17Hey, you can do this.
00:19:19Just act like a slut.
00:19:23Just pretend you're Lexi.
00:19:26You know, my favorite chapter is Sodom and the War.
00:19:35Chris.
00:19:37Hi.
00:19:38Can I talk to you?
00:19:40Uh-huh.
00:19:41In private?
00:19:42Oh, hey, Lexi.
00:19:57Hey, Lexi.
00:19:58What?
00:19:59Chris.
00:20:01You're so sexy.
00:20:02Ever since you played Jesus at camp, I've just, I've known that we were meant to be together.
00:20:10And I really want to...
00:20:13Oh, what are you doing?
00:20:15Is that wrong?
00:20:16Sue, what's gotten into you?
00:20:18Nothing.
00:20:18I'm sorry.
00:20:19I don't know how to do this.
00:20:21Sue.
00:20:23Sue, Sue.
00:20:24Sue, I understand these urges.
00:20:30And, you know, I like you too.
00:20:34Really?
00:20:35You do?
00:20:35I do.
00:20:36I really do.
00:20:38I like you too.
00:20:40Really?
00:20:41You do?
00:20:42I do.
00:20:43I really do.
00:20:44It's just...
00:20:45I've devoted a lot of my life to one certain man.
00:20:51Right.
00:20:52Lexi said you were...
00:20:53Jesus.
00:20:54Oh, that man.
00:20:56Of course.
00:20:57What did you think?
00:20:59Oh, nothing.
00:21:00So we can still do this then?
00:21:03Oh, Sue.
00:21:05You know, for me, when I think about that man who died for our sins, when I think about him up there on that cross, so helpless, yet so muscular,
00:21:21with his strong thighs crossed over each other so delicately beneath that ragged loincloth, growing so hot, so sweaty, under that hot, hot sun.
00:21:39And I just feel such compassion.
00:21:42I think about those things, too.
00:21:45So you understand why I can't do this?
00:21:49Not really.
00:21:50I just find it too hard.
00:21:52It is to give in to carnal pleasure when he sacrificed so much for us.
00:21:59I just...
00:22:00So...
00:22:01So...
00:22:03We're going to go out there, right?
00:22:12Andy, we're going to tell you three months.
00:22:14Hey, Ty.
00:22:15Whoa!
00:22:17Can you see him, Jake?
00:22:18Uh, no.
00:22:19No.
00:22:20All right.
00:22:24Okay.
00:22:24All right, focus.
00:22:25Focus, focus.
00:22:26Okay.
00:22:26Oh, there he is.
00:22:36Oh, he got me the puppy that I wanted.
00:22:51How could he?
00:22:55Two.
00:22:56What happened?
00:22:57Did you guys do it?
00:22:59Sue?
00:23:00He doesn't want me.
00:23:02Because he's gay.
00:23:03No, he's not.
00:23:04He just really loves Jesus.
00:23:06Oh, come on, Sue.
00:23:08The only reason you even liked him is because you knew he was never a real possibility for you.
00:23:13Look, the only way you're going to find out what kind of man you really want is to know what kind of woman you really are.
00:23:21Deep inside.
00:23:22What?
00:23:23Come with me.
00:23:25Where?
00:23:25To meet your dark side.
00:23:33Out.
00:23:35Everyone out.
00:23:44Sue, it's time for you and your vagina to meet face to face.
00:23:49I really can't.
00:24:01I really don't think I can do this.
00:24:04I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:09I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:14Sue?
00:24:15Can you see it?
00:24:18Sue.
00:24:22I'm almost...
00:24:23I'm almost there.
00:24:28Oh!
00:24:29What?
00:24:31What?
00:24:32Sue, what happened?
00:24:33What did you see?
00:24:35A raccoon?
00:24:36What?
00:24:36You overshot it.
00:24:39Aim the mirror further up.
00:24:47I can't.
00:24:48Please don't make me do that again.
00:24:49Okay, fine.
00:24:51Fine.
00:24:52I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice.
00:24:55What?
00:24:56You really need an orgasm.
00:24:59Honestly, I don't know how you expected to ever have sex with someone else when you've never even had it with yourself.
00:25:04This really has to be your first step.
00:25:06Lex, I'm waiting.
00:25:08Coming.
00:25:09Sue, my black vibrator is somewhere in the top drawer.
00:25:11Just find it and use it.
00:25:14Wait, what does the black vibrator look like?
00:25:16It's black.
00:25:17It vibrates.
00:25:20Come on, Rod.
00:25:21Let's go to Sue's room.
00:25:24Don't come back until you have at least one orgasm.
00:25:26Hey, cutie!
00:25:39Cutie!
00:25:44Boozeye!
00:25:45Oh, yeah!
00:25:49Bang.
00:25:51Bang.
00:25:51Bang.
00:25:52Bang.
00:25:54Good boy.
00:25:54Straighten up.
00:25:56Good boy.
00:25:57Good boy.
00:25:59He knows over a hundred commands.
00:26:02I'm sorry, I can't see anything.
00:26:04That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:26:06What a bitch.
00:26:08Fortunately, when you're blind, you get used to things like that.
00:26:10Ah!
00:26:15Ah!
00:26:19Ah!
00:26:21Ah!
00:26:21Ah!
00:26:24Ah!
00:26:24Ah!
00:26:24Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:26Ah!
00:26:26Ah!
00:26:26Ah!
00:26:26Ah!
00:26:27Ah!
00:26:27Ah!
00:26:28Ah!
00:26:28Ah!
00:26:38Oh, shit!
00:26:43What's wrong with this thing?
00:26:55What's wrong with this thing?
00:26:56Ah!
00:26:57Ah!
00:26:57Ah!
00:26:58Ah!
00:27:02Cheryl, what is wrong?
00:27:03Ah!
00:27:04Lexi, it's Jake.
00:27:06He was getting a blowjob by some pink-haired girl.
00:27:10For sure?
00:27:11Ah!
00:27:12I mean, I know I've been putting off having sex with him, so maybe, maybe it's my fault.
00:27:15That's no excuse.
00:27:17He's a dirtbag.
00:27:18How dare he?
00:27:19No, it's awful.
00:27:20No, it's awful.
00:27:21I mean, I thought I was going to marry him.
00:27:22I mean, I thought I was going to marry him.
00:27:26Oh.
00:27:27It's a text.
00:27:28It's from him.
00:27:29I can't bear myself to read it.
00:27:30Okay.
00:27:31Uh, he's looking for you.
00:27:32He wants to give you your birthday gift.
00:27:33Oh, I can't face him.
00:27:34Um, I have to go.
00:27:35I'm going.
00:27:36No, you can't just leave.
00:27:37Well, I can't stay and just pretend like nothing happened.
00:27:38I mean, maybe I should confront him.
00:27:39No.
00:27:40He'll either deny it or admit and promise never to do it again.
00:27:41Either way, it's bullshit.
00:27:42I see only one option.
00:27:43I'm leaving.
00:27:44Revenge sex.
00:27:45Reve...
00:27:46I mean, what?
00:27:47What does that even mean?
00:27:48It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:28:06But he...
00:28:07I mean, he doesn't even care.
00:28:08He doesn't even care about me.
00:28:09I mean, why would...
00:28:10He's just into other girls.
00:28:11Trust me.
00:28:12He'll care.
00:28:13Seriously, this is the worst thing you could do to him.
00:28:14To his ego.
00:28:15To screw someone else when you've never even had sex with him.
00:28:17Especially if it's with someone smarter, better looking, and with a bigger dick.
00:28:21No, I don't.
00:28:22I don't.
00:28:23I don't.
00:28:24I don't.
00:28:25I don't.
00:28:26I don't.
00:28:27I don't.
00:28:28I don't.
00:28:29I don't.
00:28:30I don't.
00:28:31I don't.
00:28:32I don't.
00:28:33I don't.
00:28:34I don't.
00:28:35No, I couldn't.
00:28:36Plus, I mean, there's no one smarter and better looking.
00:28:41Eric.
00:28:42He's perfect.
00:28:43Eric Hall?
00:28:44Are you kidding?
00:28:45I mean, he wouldn't even be into me.
00:28:48He likes your type.
00:28:49Really?
00:28:50And what type is that?
00:28:51He's funny.
00:28:52Yeah.
00:28:53Trust me.
00:28:54He's amazing.
00:28:55I fooled around with him once.
00:28:56He has this great tongue, right?
00:28:58Oh, no.
00:28:59I could never fool around with somebody you fooled around with.
00:29:02Okay, then.
00:29:03Fine.
00:29:04We will find someone else.
00:29:05Someone that I haven't.
00:29:07I fooled around.
00:29:11Okay, what does it matter that I fooled around with him?
00:29:14I mean, that's how you're not going to marry the guy.
00:29:16No, I just couldn't do it.
00:29:18Fine.
00:29:19If you want to live the rest of your life knowing that you had one chance to do the right thing,
00:29:23to make your boyfriend feel like a total, worthless piece of garbage,
00:29:26and possibly even scar him with the rest of his existence, and you chose not to do it,
00:29:30go ahead.
00:29:31But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:35I don't know.
00:29:38But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:42I don't know.
00:29:44Trust me.
00:29:45It's going to work.
00:29:49I will intercept Jake and get him upstairs.
00:29:54Hi, Cheryl.
00:29:55Are you okay enough to chat with her?
00:29:58Oh, no.
00:30:10Hey.
00:30:12Happy birthday.
00:30:14Thanks.
00:30:19Have you guys seen Jake?
00:30:37So, happy birthday.
00:30:47Do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was from Britain, but
00:30:51it's actually from us, U.S., America, United States?
00:30:58I know where we live.
00:30:59Right.
00:31:00Of course.
00:31:04I know where we live.
00:31:06Right.
00:31:07Of course.
00:31:12Hey, Jesus, Eric, are you going to make your move or not?
00:31:15Oh, you want me to move?
00:31:16Yeah, no, I can totally move.
00:31:17I just...
00:31:18No, you're fine.
00:31:31Jake!
00:31:34So, Eric, do you want to do it or not?
00:31:35Oh, I'm sorry.
00:31:38It?
00:31:39What, um...
00:31:40It.
00:31:41Like, monkey boning and, like, pigs in a blanket get real nasty.
00:31:47Oh!
00:31:48Oh, you mean, like, uh, right now?
00:31:52I mean, well, yeah.
00:31:54You know, the sooner the better.
00:31:55Yeah, sure, I mean, well, yeah, of course.
00:31:59Um, I just never realized that you...
00:32:01I mean...
00:32:04Whew, uh, it's just...
00:32:08You're so...
00:32:11You're so beautiful.
00:32:14Okay.
00:32:14Um...
00:32:14Hmm?
00:32:15Uh, no cuisine.
00:32:18Right.
00:32:19Um, of course.
00:32:21Sorry?
00:32:21Sorry.
00:32:21So, um, do you want to unwrap me?
00:32:29Oh, wow.
00:32:29Uh, you're wrapped up like a Hot Pocket or a leftover macaroni and cheese.
00:32:34Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:32:36Yeah, yeah, uh, you're fresh.
00:32:40Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:32:42Yeah, yeah, uh, you're fresh.
00:32:45Organic.
00:32:46Yep.
00:32:49So, the wrap.
00:32:50Right.
00:32:51Um, where's the, uh...
00:32:54It's, uh, the end that I just, like, right over here.
00:32:56Oh, oh, yeah, here it is.
00:32:57Yeah.
00:32:58That's where I see it.
00:32:58Um, let me just, uh...
00:33:00Ow, ow, ow.
00:33:03Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
00:33:04I, um...
00:33:05It's okay.
00:33:06Do it again.
00:33:09Sorry, I, uh, I bite my nails, so it's a little difficult.
00:33:12You know what?
00:33:13Let me just lay on the bed.
00:33:15Okay.
00:33:20Uh, let me just see.
00:33:24Oh, here it is.
00:33:25I got it.
00:33:26All right.
00:33:26It's, um, full of...
00:33:28Let me just...
00:33:29Oh, jeez.
00:33:33Uh, Cheryl, are you...
00:33:34Are you okay?
00:33:35Help!
00:33:35Uh...
00:33:36Hey, Cheryl, are you okay?
00:33:42Oh, jeez.
00:33:43Well, that was stupid.
00:33:52Yeah.
00:33:57How you doing tonight?
00:34:00You having a good time?
00:34:01Yeah?
00:34:02You good?
00:34:02Jake, I think I saw Cheryl upstairs.
00:34:06What?
00:34:07I can't hear you.
00:34:09I need another beer.
00:34:11The chips are so damn salty.
00:34:12Jake!
00:34:12It's right here.
00:34:14Upstairs.
00:34:15Yeah.
00:34:16Hold on.
00:34:17I'll take a piss.
00:34:18How much beer?
00:34:19Yeah.
00:34:19I have a good time.
00:34:44Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, um, don't, don't worry about it.
00:34:50What?
00:34:51I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:34:54Oh.
00:34:55Well, OK.
00:34:56OK.
00:34:57Mm.
00:35:14OK.
00:35:15OK.
00:35:16OK.
00:35:17Finally.
00:35:18I, uh, let me just get the blinds.
00:35:21Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:23Um, don't, don't worry about it.
00:35:25What?
00:35:26I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:30Oh.
00:35:32Well, OK.
00:35:33OK.
00:35:44Oh, no, no, no.
00:35:54Oh, no.
00:35:57Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:36:03Oh, no, no.
00:36:07Ah, ah, ah.
00:36:12What are you doing?
00:36:20Uh, I think it's time, you know, to do it.
00:36:28Um, not yet.
00:36:29More foreplay.
00:36:30Huh?
00:36:30Oh.
00:36:37So good.
00:36:40Oh.
00:36:40Yep.
00:36:43Oh, my God.
00:36:45Jaw, jaw, jaw.
00:36:46What?
00:36:46What?
00:36:47What?
00:36:47Ah.
00:36:48Oh.
00:36:49Ah, yeah.
00:36:51Lock jaw, lock jaw.
00:36:52Is that even a thing?
00:36:54I don't know.
00:36:57Ah.
00:36:58Are you okay?
00:37:01No, no, no, no.
00:37:02It's, uh, it's fine.
00:37:04I'm just embarrassed.
00:37:06I, it's probably TMJ or fracture or swollen.
00:37:13Are you sure you're okay?
00:37:15Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
00:37:16Okay, great.
00:37:17Have fun.
00:37:17Oh.
00:37:23Now.
00:37:24Now, let's do it now.
00:37:25No, not yet.
00:37:26Not yet.
00:37:26All right, I'm going to come.
00:37:30I'm going to come.
00:37:31Not yet, not yet.
00:37:31No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:37:34No, no, no, no, not yet.
00:37:35Lexi.
00:37:36Lexi.
00:37:36Oh, shit.
00:37:37Oh.
00:37:41No, no, no, not yet.
00:37:42Lexi.
00:37:43Lexi.
00:37:44Oh, shit.
00:37:45Oh.
00:37:46No means no.
00:37:47Huh?
00:37:48Oh, I'm so sorry.
00:37:49I'm sorry.
00:37:50I'm sorry.
00:37:50It's been a really long time, and I just, I haven't masturbated for anything.
00:37:54Uh-oh.
00:38:00Oh, hey, Jake.
00:38:01How you doing?
00:38:05How's it going?
00:38:06Good.
00:38:07Eric?
00:38:08Come.
00:38:09Eric, help me.
00:38:10I'm glad I can't see anything.
00:38:12Excuse me.
00:38:17Cheryl's in here.
00:38:22What's up, bro?
00:38:23What the, what the fuck is, I can't, sorry.
00:38:27Hey, wait.
00:38:29Lexi.
00:38:29Lexi.
00:38:30Lexi.
00:38:30I'm still waiting.
00:38:37Oh, I'm sorry.
00:38:38I can't see.
00:38:39I'm blind.
00:38:41Damn it.
00:38:43I'm going to save somebody to know that bitch.
00:38:45Hey, you.
00:38:47You better stop making fun of the blind, or I'm going to teach you a lesson.
00:38:51Ow!
00:38:52I'm so sorry.
00:38:55I'll never make fun of the blind again.
00:38:58Ow!
00:38:58Hey, honey, honey, honey.
00:38:59What the do you do?
00:39:01Oh, man.
00:39:06What the hell?
00:39:07I can't see you.
00:39:08Oh, man.
00:39:09I can't see you.
00:39:10I can't see you.
00:39:11I can't see you.
00:39:13I can't see you.
00:39:13I can't see you.
00:39:13I can't see you.
00:39:14I can't see you.
00:39:15Oh, man, no more water balloons.
00:39:23This party's ass.
00:39:25Yeah!
00:39:30This just isn't working.
00:39:34Nothing.
00:39:35What's the big deal about these vibrators anyway?
00:39:38Oh, man, I love this game.
00:39:50We're the controllers.
00:39:51We gotta play.
00:39:52Here, here, here.
00:39:53Okay, let me find another one.
00:39:56Whoa!
00:39:58Look at this.
00:40:00Fuel, fuel, fuel.
00:40:03Get that thing away, Jesus.
00:40:05Hey, dude, nice shot.
00:40:15Wasn't me.
00:40:21Whoa, whoa, nice.
00:40:24Are you sitting there or something?
00:40:27Hey, you found the grenade launcher.
00:40:28Nice, nice.
00:40:35Do you have the extra controller?
00:40:42Whoa!
00:40:43You are the controller.
00:40:44No, I just, I didn't, I swear, I...
00:40:49What's up?
00:40:50Hey, Sue.
00:40:50What's up, man?
00:40:51It's okay.
00:40:52It's okay.
00:40:53Hey, Sue.
00:40:54Hey, Sue.
00:40:55You are the controller.
00:40:57No, I just, I didn't, I swear, I.
00:41:11All right, all right.
00:41:12Hey, hey, Sue.
00:41:13What's going on, man?
00:41:17It's all right, um, hey, Sue.
00:41:25Hey, didn't you hear me calling you?
00:41:31Yeah, I just needed to, um.
00:41:34Oh, sure.
00:41:36Listen, Sue, I was rethinking what I said earlier.
00:41:42You were?
00:41:43You mean?
00:41:45Yeah.
00:41:49So you think we should give it a try?
00:41:52Could we go get a drink?
00:41:55Wow, um, your toilet's really, oh, you, you know what?
00:42:02I gotta go.
00:42:03Um, happy birthday.
00:42:04No, Chris, no, there wasn't, I didn't, oh, God, never mind.
00:42:20This was the worst idea ever.
00:42:23Never going to have sex.
00:42:25Now.
00:42:45Hello?
00:42:46A little attention here.
00:42:48Oh, yeah.
00:42:48Sorry.
00:42:49Lex, don't be selfish.
00:42:56All right.
00:42:58Sorry.
00:43:10Jeez.
00:43:12Who invented this stupid position anyway?
00:43:15Too much fucking multitasking.
00:43:18Screw it.
00:43:19Let's go.
00:43:49Oh, that was bad.
00:44:01That was so bad.
00:44:02Joanna, do you know a guy named JJ?
00:44:20I think that guy's name starts with a J.
00:44:22Hey, does your name start with a J?
00:44:29Yes, it does.
00:44:31So you're JJ?
00:44:31Uh-oh.
00:44:33Hello.
00:44:33Welcome to 1-900-Confess.
00:44:46Would you like a priest or a nun today?
00:45:00A nun.
00:45:01Please punch in your credit card number.
00:45:08Please hold.
00:45:09Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:141-900-Confession.
00:45:15How may I be of service?
00:45:17It's been one day since my last confession.
00:45:18I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:45:21One day.
00:45:24Ow!
00:45:29Is that too long?
00:45:30I would have come this morning, but it's my 18th birthday.
00:45:33Go on.
00:45:33Um, okay, well, I've been touching myself inappropriately.
00:45:39Well, actually, I didn't know a washing machine did.
00:45:41What's her problem?
00:45:43A washing machine touched her.
00:45:44Well, you know, I sat on a washing machine and, well.
00:45:49All right, freak, time's up.
00:45:51What?
00:45:52But what do I do?
00:45:53Just unplug the thing.
00:45:54No, but I think I might have had an orgasm.
00:45:58Well, then be happy.
00:46:00You found the perfect man.
00:46:01I'm serious.
00:46:02Look, honey, you seem like a nice young lady, so I'll tell you this.
00:46:09Masturbation isn't a sin.
00:46:11No contritions?
00:46:13You broke no covenant with God.
00:46:15It's not in the Bible.
00:46:17So the washing machine could touch me anytime?
00:46:20Like morning, afternoon, night?
00:46:23Yes, and other things can touch you.
00:46:26Accidental masturbation is not a sin.
00:46:28Neither is intentional masturbation.
00:46:31Huh.
00:46:32God's pretty cool that way.
00:46:34He sure is.
00:46:35Now run along.
00:46:39Wow.
00:46:40How do you know all that?
00:46:43Because I'm a nun.
00:46:44Now eat my pussy, bitch.
00:46:47Huh.
00:46:47Accidental masturbation.
00:46:49Who would have thought?
00:46:50Revenge sex.
00:47:00What a stupid fucking idea.
00:47:02God, I'm getting out of here.
00:47:06Yeah, admit it.
00:47:07I've got no game.
00:47:09I guess I can skip it.
00:47:10I guess I'm a few more.
00:47:15Fucking douchebag.
00:47:16No, I have to get laid if it's the last thing I do.
00:47:22You go, girl.
00:47:24What?
00:47:26What are you doing here?
00:47:28We needed someplace private.
00:47:30But hey, listen.
00:47:31If you're serious about getting laid.
00:47:33Yeah?
00:47:34If you want someone great.
00:47:35I mean, really, the best ever.
00:47:39No offense.
00:47:41Frank, the blind guy?
00:47:43Really?
00:47:44I'm telling you, he's amazing.
00:47:48I had food sex with him a few weeks ago.
00:47:50It was like nothing I've ever experienced before.
00:47:53It was like we used all our senses.
00:47:55Everything.
00:47:58If you're interested, I'll set it up.
00:48:02All right.
00:48:09What about him?
00:48:10Jeremy.
00:48:11Oh, yeah.
00:48:12I know Jeremy.
00:48:13Hey, I think I fooled around with him once.
00:48:16I didn't know his last name, though.
00:48:18It's Jones.
00:48:20Jeremy Jones.
00:48:21This all makes sense.
00:48:23Excuse me.
00:48:25Jeremy.
00:48:26Hi.
00:48:27Hey.
00:48:28Who's on the phone?
00:48:29Oh, that's my new girlfriend.
00:48:31No meter.
00:48:32I'll have to be here in like an hour.
00:48:34Wait.
00:48:34You have a girlfriend?
00:48:48Oh.
00:48:49Hey, Frank.
00:48:51Sit.
00:48:55Oh, you meant the dog.
00:48:58Relax.
00:49:02You need to relax and calm down.
00:49:13Oh, I'm relaxed.
00:49:15I'm fine.
00:49:16Why are you biting your nail?
00:49:18I'm not.
00:49:21How did you know that?
00:49:22I'm not.
00:49:25Corner.
00:49:29Sit.
00:49:31Roll over.
00:49:35Oh, you mean me.
00:49:39Roll over.
00:49:42Oh, you mean me.
00:49:44Oh, how do you...
00:49:45How do you want me to...
00:49:46Just lay down.
00:49:48You know, it...
00:49:48I...
00:49:49Oh, oh.
00:50:00I shouldn't even be doing this, but...
00:50:02Considering it a teachable moment.
00:50:05Okay.
00:50:09Oh.
00:50:11See me with your hands.
00:50:17All right.
00:50:18Uh...
00:50:18You know, I should really...
00:50:26I have a boyfriend,
00:50:27and I shouldn't be doing this.
00:50:28Really.
00:50:32Oh.
00:50:41Mmm, peanut butter.
00:50:42Mmm.
00:50:42Mmm.
00:50:42Mmm.
00:50:43Mmm.
00:50:43Mmm.
00:50:44Mmm.
00:50:44Mmm.
00:50:45Mmm.
00:50:45Mmm.
00:50:46Mmm.
00:50:46Mmm.
00:50:47Mmm.
00:50:48Mmm.
00:50:49Mmm.
00:50:50Mmm.
00:50:51Mmm.
00:50:52Mmm.
00:50:53Mmm.
00:50:54Mmm.
00:50:55Mmm.
00:50:56Mmm.
00:50:57Frank.
00:50:57Frank.
00:50:58Frank.
00:50:58Oh.
00:50:59Oh, Frank.
00:51:01Oh.
00:51:01Oh, Frank.
00:51:26Oh, Frank.
00:51:27You know, man?
00:51:28Dude, give me two.
00:51:29My chips, one boy.
00:51:31Dude, give me two, man.
00:51:32My chips.
00:51:33Dude, my chips.
00:51:34Dude, my chips.
00:51:35Dude, give me two.
00:51:36My chips?
00:51:38Guys, why are you making such a mess?
00:51:41Sorry.
00:51:49It's just a case of accidental masturbation.
00:51:51That's all masturbation.
00:51:52That's all.
00:51:53No, why don't we do this?
00:51:54Go ahead.
00:51:55I got it.
00:51:56I got it.
00:51:57No, I got it.
00:51:58No, really.
00:51:59Please.
00:52:00I want to help.
00:52:01Okay, everybody out.
00:52:02Leave.
00:52:03I have to back you.
00:52:04I got it.
00:52:05Okay, everybody out.
00:52:06Leave.
00:52:07I have to back you.
00:52:21You're not even getting the chips.
00:52:22They're over here.
00:52:23I see some dust over here, so...
00:52:27So, it's just so much dust on this floor.
00:52:33It's a dirty floor.
00:52:35It's such a dirty, dirty floor.
00:52:39And it's...
00:52:57Okay.
00:52:58Oh, all right.
00:53:01I think I got all that.
00:53:03I'm just going to...
00:53:04I'll see you at home.
00:53:11We got it.
00:53:12Oh, here we go.
00:53:14Frankie.
00:53:16Oh, my...
00:53:17What was that?
00:53:18What?
00:53:19Ah, fucking shit.
00:53:21Man, we got a smoke.
00:53:22Oh, we can smoke in here.
00:53:25Stop.
00:53:26Frank, stop teasing Frank.
00:53:28Oh, shit.
00:53:30Sorry, man.
00:53:31We're just looking for a place to finish this road.
00:53:33Oh, I heard something.
00:53:34You want to join us?
00:53:36No, I might try.
00:53:36Come on, you gotta do it.
00:53:38Come on.
00:53:39Seriously, guys.
00:53:39What's your dog, man?
00:53:41What's it like being blinded?
00:53:42It's trippy.
00:53:47Frank?
00:53:49Frank, are we going to do something soon?
00:53:50Bro, you are too funny.
00:53:57Thanks, man.
00:53:58Oh, this is some good stuff.
00:54:00I haven't smoked since junior high.
00:54:01Dude, I haven't stopped smoking since junior high.
00:54:04Wait, wait, wait.
00:54:05I feel like I was supposed to be doing something.
00:54:10Damn, I really can't remember.
00:54:11This is some good shit.
00:54:12You're the devil.
00:54:17You're the devil.
00:54:33No more.
00:54:34JJ, I'm Jeremy.
00:54:39You have to remember that amazing time we had together,
00:54:42don't you?
00:54:43Please.
00:54:44Lex, I can't.
00:54:46I mean, I got a girlfriend.
00:54:48I really like this girl.
00:54:50Fine.
00:54:51It's just so sad because I'm wearing this coupless bra,
00:54:56and I also have on crotchless panties
00:54:59with just a little string of pearl in front
00:55:02for extra stimulation.
00:55:05Oh.
00:55:09We've got, like, 30 minutes before she gets here.
00:55:12Perfect.
00:55:16Before she gets here.
00:55:17Perfect.
00:55:18Do it.
00:55:29Let's do it.
00:55:30Fuck me.
00:55:31Fuck me now.
00:55:36What?
00:55:37What's wrong?
00:55:38I can't.
00:55:39I can't get it in.
00:55:41It's too dry down there.
00:55:42It's a desert down there.
00:55:44It's sandpaper.
00:55:46Okay, I get the picture.
00:55:48Just try it again.
00:55:51No.
00:55:52Why is this happening?
00:55:54We fooled around before.
00:55:56I was dripping wet.
00:55:57I came, like, four times, remember?
00:55:59Just do what you did then.
00:56:00Go on.
00:56:01I already did my thing.
00:56:02I already tried.
00:56:05What?
00:56:05What is different this time?
00:56:07I don't know.
00:56:09Last time, I honestly don't even know
00:56:14what you're talking about.
00:56:15What?
00:56:15You're not JJ?
00:56:19But your name is Jeremy Jones.
00:56:21How can you not be JJ?
00:56:23Who the hell is this JJ?
00:56:26Where are you going?
00:56:27We're not done here.
00:56:29I can still do this.
00:56:30I just need a little bit of work.
00:56:31I can do this.
00:56:32I don't need JJ.
00:56:34I don't need anyone else.
00:56:35We can do this.
00:56:37Go team.
00:56:42What?
00:56:43Just keep going.
00:56:44Oh.
00:56:44Oh.
00:56:44Oh.
00:56:47Jeremy.
00:56:48Are you going to be here?
00:56:49Shit.
00:56:51Jeremy.
00:56:54Where's Jeremy?
00:57:00We were just, you know, working on.
00:57:05Hey, babe.
00:57:06Just working out.
00:57:11How could you, you bastard?
00:57:16You might want to.
00:57:17What?
00:57:19What?
00:57:20What?
00:57:24Mariela.
00:57:25Mariela.
00:57:27You know, those aren't mine.
00:57:28At least not all of them.
00:57:31What is wrong with you?
00:57:36What is wrong with you?
00:57:39You used to be so pure.
00:57:42Well, no more.
00:57:42That's it.
00:57:44Really, that's the last one.
00:57:45Oh, my God.
00:57:56Come on.
00:57:56Oh.
00:57:57Cheryl?
00:58:15What is it?
00:58:20What are you doing down here?
00:58:22I'm waiting for everyone to leave so I can sneak out and get far, far away from here.
00:58:27What?
00:58:28Why?
00:58:29Nothing.
00:58:30Just this blind guy and his dog and ugh.
00:58:33Honey.
00:58:34It's gonna be okay.
00:58:36No, it's not okay.
00:58:38God.
00:58:39And you know whose fault it is?
00:58:41I'm sorry.
00:58:42It's Jake's.
00:58:43Jake's fault.
00:58:44That blind cheating bastard.
00:58:47Yes.
00:58:48He is such a dickwad.
00:58:49You need to confront him.
00:58:51Yeah.
00:58:52Yeah, I need to confront him.
00:58:53I mean, it's my birthday and where is he anyway?
00:58:56Like, why isn't he hanging out with me?
00:58:58You know, you just call him here and give him a big piece of your mind.
00:59:01Yeah, a big piece.
00:59:02A big old chunk of my mind.
00:59:04A big piece of it.
00:59:05Yeah.
00:59:06You know, you might wanna...
00:59:09You need to look hot while you break up with him.
00:59:11Yeah, you're right.
00:59:12Why am I wearing a sheet?
00:59:13I know.
00:59:14I'm sorry.
00:59:15I'm sorry.
00:59:16I get shy around beautiful women like you.
00:59:18I got no game.
00:59:19It's not important.
00:59:20It's not important.
00:59:25Hey, um...
00:59:26Eric, I can't talk right now.
00:59:27No, no, no.
00:59:28I really need to talk to you.
00:59:29Really, Eric, I can't right now, so...
00:59:30No, no, no, no.
00:59:31I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
00:59:32No, no, no.
00:59:33I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
00:59:34about earlier, and I'm just embarrassed, and I wanna make it up to you.
00:59:37Eric, really?
00:59:38No, no, no.
00:59:39I really need to talk to you.
00:59:41Really, Eric, I can't right now, so...
00:59:43No, no, no, no.
00:59:44I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier, and I'm just embarrassed, and I wanna make it
01:00:02up to you.
01:00:03Eric, really?
01:00:04I don't care.
01:00:05It's fine.
01:00:06No, but I do.
01:00:07I mean, I do.
01:00:08I care.
01:00:09I haven't known how to tell you.
01:00:12Maybe because, I don't know, I'm a little shy.
01:00:15But I was wondering, or hoping, that we could go out sometime.
01:00:21Soon.
01:00:22Because I'm gonna be leaving for a little while, and it would be nice to go out.
01:00:26Really?
01:00:27Eric, you're shy.
01:00:28You have no game.
01:00:30No, not really.
01:00:32Yeah, no, I can't do this.
01:00:33Sorry.
01:00:34Okay.
01:00:35All right.
01:00:36I, uh...
01:00:37Happy birthday, then.
01:00:38Oh, I'm sorry.
01:00:39I was trying to kiss you.
01:00:41Wow.
01:00:42Wow.
01:00:43Wow.
01:00:44Wow.
01:00:45Wow.
01:00:46Wow.
01:00:47Wow.
01:00:48Wow.
01:00:49Wow.
01:00:50Wow.
01:00:52Here I come, baby.
01:00:53Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:00:54Oh, wow.
01:00:55What's the day?
01:00:56Oh, I don't know.
01:00:57I want to do this.
01:00:58I want to do this.
01:00:59Oh, sorry.
01:01:00I'm sorry.
01:01:01I was trying to kiss you.
01:01:02Wow.
01:01:03I want to do this one.
01:01:04Wow.
01:01:05Wow.
01:01:06Wow.
01:01:07Wow.
01:01:09Wow.
01:01:14God.
01:01:16Here I come baby. Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:01:23Oh, Mary, stop. Um, we can't do this.
01:01:28Oh god, Mary, not again.
01:01:30Oh no, um...
01:01:31Honey, happy...
01:01:33What the fuck is this? Who the hell are you, dude?
01:01:37Okay, guys, don't.
01:01:40Cheryl, baby, what is this?
01:01:45Aw, gee, Cheryl. You're...
01:01:48I've been looking for you all night and you've been...
01:01:51Oh man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:01:53You couldn't find me?
01:01:55What about all those girls' vaginas you were in
01:01:58or your penis getting sucked?
01:02:00Cheryl, honey.
01:02:01No, no.
01:02:02We can work this out.
01:02:03Baby, I love you.
01:02:05Jake, no, you have to go.
01:02:06Baby, I'll be faithful from now on, please.
01:02:08I promise.
01:02:09No, Jake, I can't do this. I'm sorry.
01:02:11Cheryl, come on.
01:02:13No, Jake, please, just go, just go. I'm sorry.
01:02:16You're a harmless bitch!
01:02:18How can you do...
01:02:19Yay! You did it.
01:02:21I am so proud of you.
01:02:22You got your revenge sex.
01:02:24You left him a mere shell of a man.
01:02:26Revenge sex?
01:02:28It's really not what it sounds like at all.
01:02:31Right.
01:02:33It all makes sense now.
01:02:35Wow.
01:02:36I feel really stupid.
01:02:38Eric, I'm really...
01:02:39I'm really sorry.
01:02:41Cheryl, I really liked you.
01:02:44And you used me.
01:02:46Eric, please don't go.
01:02:48Please, Eric!
01:02:49Aren't you happy?
01:02:52Well, no, that's not exactly how it's supposed to feel like.
01:02:56You mean the sex, was it?
01:02:58Yeah?
01:02:59No, we didn't quite do it.
01:03:01Oh.
01:03:02You know, I couldn't seem to do it either.
01:03:03Really?
01:03:04I just never found the right guy.
01:03:06Or guys.
01:03:07Anyway, we better get downstairs.
01:03:10People are starting to leave.
01:03:11I wonder how Sue did.
01:03:13I can't believe she dumped me, man.
01:03:26This is bullshit!
01:03:27God!
01:03:28Oh!
01:03:29Oh!
01:03:30Oh!
01:03:31Dude, suck it!
01:03:32What the?
01:03:33God, I'm out of here!
01:03:35Yeah!
01:03:36He has good hair, though.
01:03:38No, you puked on me.
01:03:43And don't tease my car, either.
01:03:45Right, Seth, Frank, that I might need a vacation.
01:03:50Vacation, vacation.
01:03:53Take this information through your head.
01:03:57Oh, Sue, are you all right?
01:04:01Was it from sex?
01:04:02Did you pop your cork?
01:04:03I don't think so.
01:04:04Not with the guy, anyway.
01:04:06Oh, don't ask.
01:04:08Every possible object.
01:04:10It's like every mechanical thing.
01:04:12It was like transformers.
01:04:14They just all became vibrators.
01:04:16I told you.
01:04:18It's addicting.
01:04:19So what about Chris?
01:04:22Well, last time I saw him, he was running away for dear life.
01:04:24I told you he was gay.
01:04:25Oh.
01:04:26Well, I think I'm just all cramp.
01:04:30Oh.
01:04:31Oh, I think it's broken.
01:04:33So wait.
01:04:35None of us cashed an RV card.
01:04:41Oh, Joanna, you're so sweet.
01:04:44So I was gonna go grab some food.
01:04:46Wanna go?
01:04:47No.
01:04:49I think I should finish up here.
01:04:51Did you ever find that guy you were looking for?
01:04:53No.
01:04:55I don't know.
01:04:56For some reason, I just realized he needs to be my first.
01:04:59Or something.
01:05:00Why?
01:05:01Do you know him?
01:05:02Sort of.
01:05:03Oh.
01:05:04Well, hey, if you happen to run into him, tell him I'd like to see him again.
01:05:08I love him.
01:05:09Shut it.
01:05:10You wanna do it with him?
01:05:11I don't wanna hear it with him.
01:05:12I don't wanna hear it with him.
01:05:13You wanna get married?
01:05:14You wanna do it with him?
01:05:15All right, all right, all right, all right.
01:05:17I hear it from you.
01:05:18I want to get married.
01:05:19You want to do it.
01:05:20Alright, alright, alright.
01:05:21No, no way.
01:05:49Oh, well.
01:06:05There's always next year.
01:06:15It's you.
01:06:30I've been waiting for you, JJ.
01:06:32Joanna.
01:06:33I don't know.
01:06:37It looks good.
01:07:53Who's Eric's?
01:07:56It's him, right?
01:07:59Oh.
01:08:01Yeah.
01:08:03I have to go see him.
01:08:05Well, I think you know what we should do.
01:08:11One nine hundred confess.
01:08:24Sister Therese?
01:08:26Yeah, hon.
01:08:27There was a problem with your credit card.
01:08:29I just need the last three numbers in the back.
01:08:32Oh, sure.
01:08:34It's two seven one.
01:08:36Um, sister, I know this isn't a confession, but can I ask your opinion on something?
01:08:41Do you think if you do something bad that God will forgive you, like take you back?
01:08:47Sure, hon.
01:08:48Why not?
01:08:49As long as you're on the right path.
01:08:52Well, how do you know if you're on that path?
01:08:54I always look for some kind of sign from the universe.
01:08:59Something to let me know that it's all going to be okay.
01:09:03Sister?
01:09:04Can I get up now?
01:09:06I really got to pee.
01:09:07No, hush your trap.
01:09:11Okay, honey, I really need to get back to work, but call back any time.
01:09:15I will.
01:09:17Thanks.
01:09:20Sister?
01:09:21Shut up or I'll punish you hard, you sheep, fucker!
01:09:37Eric, wait!
01:09:44Cheryl?
01:09:46Eric, um, look, I am so sorry about everything.
01:09:52I was trying to have revenge sex with you at the beginning, but then at the end I wasn't.
01:09:57I just didn't want to do that with you.
01:10:00The revenge part, not the sex part.
01:10:02Um, I, I do want to go out with you.
01:10:08And I didn't realize that until this morning.
01:10:12I mean, you're a completely different guy than Jake is, and he's all over these-
01:10:15Eric!
01:10:17Come on, I've got to get going.
01:10:20Oh, wow.
01:10:21Um, Cheryl, this is my sister Tina.
01:10:24Tina, Cheryl.
01:10:26Hi, nice to meet you.
01:10:28Uh, so, um, do you mind if I call you in a few days, when I get back?
01:10:37Yeah, sure.
01:10:44Oh, sorry, no kissing, right?
01:10:47No, kissing.
01:10:48Oh.
01:10:48Hey, did you ever, uh, get those flowers I sent you?
01:11:09I, I don't even care that you hooked up a plexi.
01:11:12Wait, what?
01:11:13I never did that.
01:11:14I mean, you don't have to lie about it.
01:11:17She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:11:24She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:11:27I wonder who it was.
01:11:28At least this birthday's over.
01:11:49Dear Lord, please forgive me.
01:12:03I mean, if you could just, I don't know, like, send me a sign.
01:12:07I don't know, like, send me a sign.
01:12:38Excuse me, excuse me.
01:12:40Uh, do you know where the church is?
01:12:41It's on Fountain Street.
01:12:43Um, yeah, that's the church I go to.
01:12:46Or used to go to.
01:12:47Um, it's straight up that way and then left.
01:12:53You're more than welcome to come with me if you like.
01:12:56Oh, um, I don't know.
01:12:57Ha.
01:13:04Well, that's pretty powerful.
01:13:06Oh, 250 horsepower, 225 pounds of torque.
01:13:12Like I said, you're more than welcome to hop on.
01:13:16I don't think so.
01:13:18But thanks.
01:13:19What's your name?
01:13:20Sue.
01:13:21What's yours?
01:13:23Jesus.
01:13:24Really?
01:13:26Si.
01:13:26Uh, maybe I could use the ride.
01:13:30Oh, my.
01:13:32No.
01:13:33No.
01:13:34Oh, my God.