A funny and emotionally honest short film, "Stuck" takes a raunchy, potentially gimmicky premise, and expands the joke into something deeper—building to a place that is surprisingly earnest and heartfelt - S/W Curator, Ivan Kander
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Well, I have no interest in continuing something that's not going anywhere.
00:09What, did it fall out?
00:15It didn't fall out.
00:20Oh shit.
00:23Oh my god, oh my god, you want to be fucking kidding me?
00:26Well, isn't the base supposed to stop it from going in?
00:28You must have used too much lube. Oh my god.
00:32I can't reach it.
00:33Okay, do you want me to Google something?
00:35Just...
00:37Go get it.
00:40Okay. Uh...
00:42Okay. Yes. Okay. I'm... Okay.
00:46Just relax.
00:47Oh my god, this was such a dumb idea.
00:50Oh my god.
00:53It's just...
00:55I don't think the Uber driver sensed anything.
01:10This is the most humiliating night of my life.
01:17Well, I'm sure they see this kind of thing all the time.
01:24Really?
01:25All the time?
01:26Oh yeah.
01:27People are always sticking stuff up there.
01:30You know, you can go.
01:32You don't have to stay.
01:34I want to.
01:36You feel obligated to.
01:47When's the last time you were in the hospital?
01:50Guess it must have been when I was eight years old.
01:53My sister pushed me into the front door of our house, busted my lip wide open.
01:57Well, you probably deserved it.
01:59Probably.
02:00Yeah.
02:02Got a bunch of stitches.
02:04You even have a scar too.
02:06Can't see it, but it's under the beard.
02:07Oh yeah.
02:08I never miss that.
02:16How about you?
02:17Uh, six months ago to say goodbye to my grandma.
02:20Oh.
02:21I'm sorry.
02:22That sucks.
02:24Yeah, I think so.
02:29Do you think your dead relatives can just spy on you from beyond the grave?
02:32And see all the gross shit you do when you're by yourself or with a partner or something?
02:36No, I just think they probably have better things to do.
02:39Okay, well, not all the time then.
02:42Okay, but tonight, let's say, for example, my grandma is up there floating around in heaven, presumably.
02:50And she's like, oh, I think I'll check in on my beautiful Natalie tonight.
02:56What could she possibly be?
02:59Oh my goodness, my baby!
03:06She used to warn me about guys like you.
03:08Really?
03:10Who are guys like me?
03:12You know.
03:13Fuckboys.
03:15Granny.
03:16She didn't actually say fuckboy, did she?
03:18You'd be surprised.
03:19Wow.
03:20I do not care for that designation.
03:23Oh.
03:24How about emotionally unavailable then?
03:27Oh, it's probably close hair.
03:29Hmm.
03:30That's kind of my thing.
03:31Dating emotionally unavailable guys.
03:35My therapist thinks it's because, deep down, I think that I don't deserve happiness.
03:50And I always just laugh her off, but maybe she's right, you know?
03:53Yeah.
03:54Are your parents happy?
03:55Are you my shrink now?
03:56No.
03:57I just, um, I read this thing once where we don't want to have more than our parents did.
04:15Even if we say otherwise.
04:16Hmm.
04:18Well, my dad died when I was really young.
04:22My mom never remarried.
04:23She never really dated.
04:24So, yeah, maybe that's part of it.
04:27What's fucked is I just keep throwing myself into these things just so trusting.
04:42It's like I wish all of the heartbreak would make me more guarded or more cynical and just
04:49We're protected, but that's not me.
04:55It's not me to not be hopeful or trusting or not to love.
05:01I guess it's just my programming.
05:03So, what do we think?
05:19Is it a boy or a girl?
05:21Or do we not want to know?
05:22Will you put that back?
05:23Hmm?
05:24Put that back.
05:25That's right.
05:26Put that back.
05:29I really don't have to stay.
05:30I'll be fine.
05:31I'm staying.
05:32Get over it.
05:34You know, I can't tell.
05:35Are you a nice guy?
05:37Are you an asshole?
05:39I'm both.
05:40I'm a hybrid.
05:41I guess that explains it then.
05:50You know, you really led me on there.
05:56Well, I thought I was being upfront with you.
05:58I did say right from the beginning that I'm not looking for anything serious.
06:01Oh, yeah.
06:02You're not looking for anything serious.
06:03We all say that and we all secretly hope that someone will come along and change our minds.
06:10Yeah, I suppose that's true.
06:15So it's just me then?
06:17No, it isn't.
06:18Natalie...
06:21You're amazing.
06:23You're kind.
06:24You're...
06:25Brilliant.
06:26Total freak in bed.
06:30But...
06:33But...
06:35I don't know.
06:36I guess we're just not the right fit.
06:40Okay, say more about that.
06:43Okay.
06:48Well, I don't know.
06:51Well, I mean, for one, our diets are completely different.
06:54I mean, you're a vegan.
06:55What would we even eat?
06:57We've managed so far.
07:00Yeah, so far.
07:01But that's the kind of thing that becomes a problem down the road.
07:04I mean, I love cheese.
07:05Real cheese.
07:06I can't do any more of this cashew cheese of yours.
07:08Oh!
07:09Yeah, tell me.
07:10Tell me this is about cashew cheese.
07:12I'm not explaining this right.
07:14I...
07:15You think?
07:17I don't know.
07:18I guess I just don't feel that thing.
07:21What thing?
07:24That thing.
07:25That rush.
07:27That...
07:28intensity.
07:31Oh.
07:33Well, if you felt like this, why didn't you say something earlier?
07:38I guess I didn't want to hurt your feelings.
07:40Great job.
07:42You aced that.
07:47You know that feeling you're talking about that rush that can't be the foundation for a relationship because that shit fades.
07:55That's not what love is.
07:56Yes, I know that.
07:57Really?
07:58Because it sounds like to me you think that love is supposed to be some sort of laser show all the time.
08:03Nope.
08:04That's not at all what I believe.
08:05Well, what do you believe then?
08:06I believe that love is something that's made in the trenches.
08:13It's two people fighting for it even when it's hard.
08:18Right.
08:22Right.
08:25Right, but that's why that initial rush is important because it propels the whole thing forward.
08:29It's like relationship jet fuel.
08:31No, and I think, I think you're just chasing some idealistic idea of connection that doesn't exist.
08:36Well, I do know that it exists because I've had it before.
08:41Well, why don't you go call her then?
08:44Jesus.
08:45Well, you may have noticed that she is not around.
08:55And you know why?
08:58Because things end.
09:00They always do.
09:02So what's the point in getting invested in something that's just transitory?
09:05Let me ask you this.
09:06Would you give up all the good times you had with this person to never feel the pain of losing them?
09:20No, I guess not.
09:26The pain of losing someone is the price of having them.
09:31If you're going to avoid the bad, you're going to keep out all the good too.
09:34Good too.
09:45So how you feeling?
09:47Okay.
09:48Yeah?
09:49Lighter.
09:52You going to keep it?
09:54Do what with it?
09:55Put it on my mantle?
09:57I just mean if at first you don't succeed.
10:00No.
10:02I hope this experience hasn't soured you on butt plate.
10:04Oh my god.
10:05Okay.
10:06You know what?
10:07The butt plug was not the biggest pain in my ass tonight.
10:09Oh!
10:10Jokes!
10:11Love jokes!
10:12So funny!
10:22All right.
10:23Mr. Hybrid.
10:24This is me.
10:26Want to keep walking for a bit?
10:29It's cold out.
10:30We could go get something for breakfast.
10:31Know anything that's open around here?
10:38There's a really good vegan place around the corner.
10:40Perfect!
10:42We have cashew cheese.
10:43I love cashew cheese.
10:44You love cashew cheese!
10:45It's so good for you.
10:47It's so good for the environment.
10:48Yes.
10:49Anne Witt.
10:50What's the scripture about it and the size of it.
10:53Bring all the brakes in this.
10:54I'm sure you're getting close.