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  • 5/18/2025

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00Marco.
00:03Hello.
00:08You're such a doofus over here.
00:17David, how dare you cheat on me?
00:21I'm going to smash your head in.
00:24You're insane. I want a divorce.
00:28Fine.
00:30Did you get the evidence?
00:33Got it right here.
00:36It's all on video.
00:43Don't forget to give me a five-star rating on my Odd Jobs Riley account.
00:49You two are together in this?
00:51Oops.
00:53Wait! Don't run!
00:55Stop right there!
00:57Stop right there!
00:59Stop right there!
01:00Hey!
01:11Your grandma set up a blind date for you.
01:17Sir, please forgive me.
01:18She told me that if I didn't make it happen, she'd fire me.
01:48Another day. Another day.
02:06Yo, dude. Have you seen a woman in red running past by?
02:09No, man. Um, maybe that way.
02:14Good luck.
02:18Yeah.
02:23Whoa.
02:34Be my lover.
02:35Huh?
02:39Are you serious? You want me to be your lover?
02:43Yeah. And I'll pay you $5,000 an hour.
02:48Well, what's the catch? I mean, what kind of lover do you...
02:52Do you want me to... you want me...
02:55No.
02:56Don't kid yourself.
03:00Is this some kind of trick? Some sort of scam because you know that I have everything except for money?
03:06My name is Noah Williams. Williams, like the Williams Group.
03:15Yeah. Oh, I know the Williams Group. I mean, you're on the Fortune 500. No, you're on the Fortune 10 list.
03:23That's the one.
03:24What kind of lover do you want me to be?
03:25Just be yourself. You're a man. That might be enough to ward her off.
03:29Thanks, I'm a man. Thanks.
03:30Thanks, I'm a man. Thanks.
03:31Thanks.
03:32She's here. That's the lady from...
03:34Noah...
03:35This is...
03:36Oh, Miss Peralta's time. This is a...
03:37Oh, Miss Peralta's time.
03:38This is a...
03:39Oh, Miss Peralta's time.
03:40What kind of lover do you want me to be?
03:41What kind of lover do you want me to be?
03:42Just be yourself.
03:43You're a man. That might be enough to ward her off.
03:45Thanks, I'm a man.
03:46Thanks.
03:47She's here. That's the lady from...
03:48Noah...
03:49This is...
03:50Oh, Miss Peralta's time. This is a...
04:03business associate. So, please, have a seat.
04:08I've heard so much about you from your grandma.
04:12I'm sorry. Let me just pick that up.
04:24Oh.
04:25You know how clumsy you can be?
04:26Oh.
04:28You're such a liar.
04:30If you're into men, just say it.
04:32Your shampoo is, uh, silky smooth. That's one of ours.
04:44You know that's for women, right?
04:46Oh. That. Solid sale. Love a good sale.
04:53So...
04:58How was my performance?
05:02Pretty good.
05:03Yeah.
05:05You think you could, uh, give me some more money?
05:08Doctor, here's the payment for my mom's treatment this month.
05:19Miss Cooper, the fees for a comatose patient are astronomical.
05:23I suggest you...
05:24I won't give up.
05:25I know she's gonna wake up, and...
05:29It's just money. I'll find a way.
05:32I'll find a way.
05:33I'll find a way.
05:34Noah.
05:49So, I was just wondering if you had any more jobs, you know, for me.
05:59Odd jobs, Riley.
06:01No.
06:04You know, you and I have been through a lot together.
06:13Been through? I gave you a job and you delivered.
06:17Come on, you can't say that we have no relationship at all.
06:21I mean, you had your arm draped around my shoulder, your hands on my waist, and oh!
06:31We kissed.
06:32So come on.
06:34You must have something for me.
06:36Damn.
06:37I didn't even know Noah was in the closet.
06:38No wonder he hated all those blind dates.
06:41Have you ever worked in a multinational company?
06:43Have you ever done statistical analysis, market segmentation, process optimization?
06:48No.
06:49You are not qualified to be my employee.
06:53Please.
06:54I'll do anything.
06:56Ooh.
06:57Samantha.
07:04No.
07:06What are you doing here?
07:09I'm here to be your personal assistant.
07:11What are you doing here?
07:12I'm here to be your personal assistant.
07:15A member of the Barclays family, our business associate,
07:17and you expect me to believe that you would stoop as load
07:20as being my assistant?
07:22Well, you know I just got back from Harvard,
07:24getting my MBA, and I'm a little green.
07:27I need someone to show me around
07:28and get some real world experience.
07:32I thought, maybe someone like you.
07:35There's no end to Samantha's excuses.
07:45Sorry, Samantha, but I already have an assistant.
07:52This guy.
08:00So I'm not qualified, but now I'm your assistant?
08:04That's right, you have no qualifications, no education,
08:06nothing on your resume that leads to the position,
08:08but you do have one redeeming quality.
08:10What's that?
08:12You're a man.
08:18Tighter.
08:19Can you go any tighter?
08:20Is this really necessary?
08:21You barely even have a tiny bump.
08:25Do you really need to go this far
08:26to cover some medical bills?
08:28Because she's not even your real mom.
08:30She is and will always be my mom.
08:32I mean, when she found me,
08:34I was barely getting by without her.
08:35Who knows if I would even be here right now?
08:38Biological or not, she's my mom.
08:41All right, got it.
08:42You don't have to be so stern.
08:45Oh, I prepared one more thing.
08:47Ta-da.
08:50How the hell is this supposed to help me?
08:53It's...
08:57Yeah.
08:58Oh, my God.
09:02Ew.
09:04All right, boss.
09:04I got your coffee like you wanted it.
09:07Black.
09:09Will you make me one coffee
09:10and you're actually, like, it's the biggest accomplishment?
09:17Sorry.
09:18Ma'am, you can't disperse into his office.
09:23Grandma, what are you doing here?
09:26Grandma, what are you doing here?
09:28Is this the person you hired
09:30to block Samantha from working this job?
09:34Grandma, you have to stop sending me people.
09:36I'm not interested in women right now, okay?
09:38I'm trying to focus on the business.
09:41Look, I get it.
09:43You're still hung up on that little girl
09:45from the orphanage with the goldfish mark.
09:49But, honey, we looked for her.
09:51We looked all over for her, and she's gone.
09:55She's dead.
09:58Riley, escort her out.
10:03Never mind.
10:04I know my way out.
10:08Oh, but, Miss Williams,
10:10you see, you told me to escort you out,
10:12so I should probably...
10:16Nola!
10:18Yeah?
10:19Here, take this.
10:20Promise you'll come back for me.
10:21I promise I'll come back for you,
10:23and I promise I won't forget you.
10:28If any, I'm gonna find you.
10:34Riley!
10:35What are you doing?
10:36This woman's restroom.
10:38I almost forgot I'm pretending to be a man.
10:42I gotta go, too.
10:43Come on.
10:44Do any of you say you need to go pee?
11:02Hurry up and go.
11:03Um, I actually don't really have to go anymore,
11:08so I'm just gonna meet you back in the office.
11:10Yep.
11:10My next meeting's in five minutes.
11:12Just go.
11:12Okay.
11:12I know what's going on.
11:26And you stuff something down there,
11:27and you don't want to get found out.
11:30Exactly.
11:31You know, size isn't everything.
11:34You just gotta be comfortable and confident with what you have.
11:38You're right.
11:38I mean, I just need to become more comfortable with who I am as a man.
11:45So, I'm gonna head out and do that, yeah.
11:51Noah!
11:52Hi!
11:52Samantha, what are you doing here?
11:55Your grandma put me in charge of the Silky Soft brand.
11:58Well, if we're gonna work together, you have to keep things professional.
12:01All right.
12:02So bossy.
12:05Also, here's your invitation for tonight's charity gala for the orphanage.
12:09Don't forget to come.
12:10Okay.
12:11Got it.
12:14Noah doesn't really seem like a charitable type.
12:17Yeah, not really.
12:18But when he was a kid, he got lost and spent a few years in an orphanage.
12:22Since taking over the company, he's actually built a few hundred orphanages.
12:28Also, don't let him drink any alcohol.
12:32Why not?
12:32You don't want to find out.

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