- 5/11/2025
Calf Love | Young Hearts & Veterinary Trials in the Dales
In Calf Love, Season 1, Episode 4 of All Creatures Great and Small, James Herriot navigates not only the challenges of veterinary life in the Yorkshire Dales but also the stirrings of young romance. As the countryside brings both tender animal moments and awkward human entanglements, James finds himself entangled in matters of both the heart and the barn. A charming episode blending light-hearted humor and heartfelt storytelling.
In Calf Love, Season 1, Episode 4 of All Creatures Great and Small, James Herriot navigates not only the challenges of veterinary life in the Yorkshire Dales but also the stirrings of young romance. As the countryside brings both tender animal moments and awkward human entanglements, James finds himself entangled in matters of both the heart and the barn. A charming episode blending light-hearted humor and heartfelt storytelling.
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TVTranscript
00:00Thank you for listening.
00:30Thank you for listening.
00:59You rotten old cow.
01:01You don't know a ministering angel from a knacker.
01:04Bad luck.
01:05I hope it hurts like hell.
01:12Have you done it, Mr. Harriet?
01:14Um, afraid not, Mr. Dent.
01:17Didn't bring the right instruments with me.
01:18That's what Mr. Farnham said when he called.
01:22You're a right meth lad.
01:23Yes.
01:24The pain's making her irritable.
01:26She moved a little fast when I was examining the ear.
01:28Mr. Farnham said that too.
01:32Did he?
01:33I'll call again in a day or so, Mr. Dent.
01:36Nothing serious.
01:37Just an oral hematoma.
01:38Aye, so he told me.
01:42I'll be getting along.
01:45Don't worry about her, Mr. Dent.
01:46I won't.
01:47You can do the worrying.
01:50My young assistant had hold of the head rope
01:52and there was old Ransom hauling on the tail
01:54like the anchorman of a tug-of-war team.
01:57And there I was with my little knife
01:58trying to get this damn great stallion.
02:00Good God.
02:07What the hell's that?
02:10Me.
02:11It certainly is.
02:12What on earth have you been up to, James?
02:14Dense pig's ear.
02:15Ah, yes, yes, yes, of course.
02:17You know, Philister, don't you?
02:19Oh, yes.
02:19Nice to see.
02:20No bother, I trust.
02:22Some.
02:23But you did the job.
02:24No.
02:25Oh, James.
02:26Simple little thing like that.
02:28I had to tell it myself.
02:28I hadn't been rushed off my feet.
02:29Hmm, so Dent explained.
02:31I was rushed off my feet, too.
02:33Always see a job through, James.
02:35I don't like an animal left to suffer.
02:37Now, if you wouldn't mind removing that fragrance,
02:39which doesn't go with gin in it,
02:40we'll talk about it later.
02:41Right.
02:43Sorry about the fragrance.
02:44Go away.
02:47Don't be misled, Philister.
02:49There's nothing wrong with young James
02:50that a hot shower won't put right,
02:52but one has to take a firm line with the young.
02:55Oh, for God's sake, Senator, the building is outing.
03:12I require trial and notice of these invitations.
03:15Try and notice.
03:16How the hell could I give you that?
03:17Bob's only just asked me.
03:18James, turn off that ruddy noise.
03:20As it happens, I'm on call tonight.
03:25What are you doing tonight, James?
03:28Nothing.
03:30What makes two of us?
03:31No problem.
03:31Enjoy yourself, Tristan.
03:33You mean I can go?
03:34Why not?
03:35The fort is man.
03:36Well, that's grand.
03:37Thanks, Siegfried.
03:38Try not to get beastly drunk.
03:39On a bell ringer's outing.
03:40Some hope.
03:41It's not a hope.
03:42It's a distinct probability.
03:44Hangovers impair efficiency.
03:45You've had too many lately, and that's another thing.
03:47Don't make it too late at night.
03:48Tomorrow looks like being an extremely busy day.
03:51I shall be the incarnation of moderation.
03:53Breakfast will find me bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
03:56Any beer going?
03:57Help yourself.
03:57How about you, James?
03:58Yes, thanks.
04:00I saw Helen with Richard Edmondson earlier.
04:03Well, what have they got to say for themselves?
04:04Oh, I didn't speak to them.
04:06They just swept by in his Bentley.
04:08So what about him?
04:10Well, nothing at all, really.
04:11It just happens to be the third time in ten days I spotted them together.
04:14Sir, do you think he's making a serious play for her?
04:17That's what the country does for empty minds, James.
04:20You're turning into the worst kind of village gossip.
04:22Oh, absolute rubbish.
04:23Helen's a damned attractive girl.
04:25I call it intelligent speculation.
04:26It's idle speculation.
04:27That's what gossip's all about.
04:29Who Helen chooses to go out with is absolutely no concern of ours.
04:32Helen who?
04:33Alderson.
04:34I don't suppose you know her?
04:35Yes, you met her when he went up to plaster that calf's leg for her father.
04:38Did you, James?
04:39Who is Richard Edmondson?
04:40Owns the Yorkshire Echo.
04:41Took it over when his old man snuffed it a couple of years back.
04:45Very good fellow, as a matter of fact.
04:46Who wrote this rush?
04:47All the girls go potty about him.
04:49And all the mothers are right behind their daughters cheering them on.
04:52So special about him.
04:53The obvious things, I'm sorry to say.
04:56Handsome, witty, charming.
04:58Man of the world with pots of money.
05:00The way women look at these things, he is a damned good catch by any standard.
05:04Only he hasn't been caught yet.
05:05Exactly.
05:06And look who's speculating now.
05:08Simply expressing a personal opinion.
05:10I'll express another one.
05:13I think that young Helen could land him if she set her mind on him.
05:17What's biting you, James?
05:19Nothing.
05:20Why?
05:22Good Lord.
05:23It can't be.
05:24Not already.
05:25Are you dribbling about now?
05:27I detect recognisable symptoms, James, my boy.
05:30You may safely confide in your Uncle Tristan.
05:33Have you fallen for the delectable Helen?
05:36Don't be an ass.
05:37I've only set eyes on her once.
05:40These things can happen, you know, James.
05:43That's what the French call the coup de foudre.
05:45Well, no need to be shy with us.
05:48Admire your taste.
05:49Nothing like setting your sights high.
05:50Here.
05:51Here.
05:52Now, I must love you and leave you.
05:53Can't keep the bell ringers waiting.
05:55Don't think of what I told you.
05:56My dear brother, as I could.
05:57Come on.
06:28Hello.
06:30Now, this is James Harriot.
06:33Oh, hello, Mr Cooper.
06:34What's the trouble?
06:36I see.
06:37Yeah, yes, I see.
06:40No, that's quite all right.
06:41I'll get out there as quickly as I can.
06:43Bye.
06:44What do you want, James?
06:46Unicarved cow, collapsed in the beck.
06:48Milk fever, he thinks.
06:49At times they'd choose.
06:50Can you cope, James?
06:51Yes, of course.
06:52Thank you very much.
07:02Tristan isn't back yet.
07:04What?
07:05His bed hasn't been slept in.
07:07Good Lord.
07:09Think they've had an accident?
07:11I don't know exactly the sort of accident he's had.
07:13I shall see to it personally that his recovery is prolonged and painful.
07:18Yes.
07:21Well, I better be off.
07:23Yes, all right, James.
07:25See you at breakfast.
07:27Oh.
07:27Tristan?
07:40What on earth are you doing?
07:41Do not shout, my friend.
07:42I implore you, do not shout.
07:43I am whispering, you complete and utter idiot.
07:45And don't rebuke me, James.
07:47I'm the victim of a hideous conspiracy.
07:50Blasted bell ringers.
07:52We have no sense of restraint, none at all.
07:54Just because it's an outing,
07:55nothing but grand side triples,
07:58if you take my meaning.
08:00When did you get back?
08:01No idea.
08:03Hours ago.
08:04Freezing to death.
08:06I didn't dare knock you up.
08:07You've got a key.
08:09I've got it.
08:11Brilliant.
08:12Siegfried's gonna skin you alive.
08:15Now, get out.
08:16I'm off on a job.
08:17He mustn't know.
08:20He wouldn't give your friend away.
08:22Bad luck.
08:23He already knows.
08:24Knows?
08:26Hmm.
08:27He came down when the phone rang.
08:30That's that.
08:34I've always liked you, James.
08:36Don't think too badly on me when I'm gone.
08:43Oh, God!
08:45You've been sick all over the passenger seat.
08:47Have I?
08:48Yes, you bloody well have.
08:49That's very inconsiderate of me.
08:50I apologise.
08:51Thank you, guys.
08:52Can I go into the house now, please?
09:08Hello, little chap.
09:28Had a good night.
09:29We're too late.
09:33Dead, ain't she?
09:34She's pretty far gone, I'm afraid.
09:37There may still be some life, innit?
09:38Damn, I hope so.
09:39That's one of me best milkers.
09:41All this happens to at Goodlands.
09:44It does, with milk fever.
09:49Give her the bag, Ernie.
09:49Is that what you can do?
10:01Try and get some calcium into her vein.
10:04Hold that for me, will you?
10:19I think she's gone.
10:49She hasn't gone.
11:05She's still with us.
11:08And her heart beats there.
11:10It's getting stronger.
11:12Yeah, just hearing things.
11:13Yes.
11:14The right things.
11:16Hmm.
11:16Well, I'll give her a few minutes.
11:23Then we'll try and roll her onto her chest.
11:29Mr. Harriet.
11:30Wherever have you been?
11:32Up to my middle in the beck, rescuing her car.
11:34It's you that needs rescuing.
11:46Here.
11:48What's that?
11:49Cookie and brandy.
11:50You'll get that inside you.
11:52Thanks, Mrs. Hall.
11:57Oh, gosh, that's marvellous.
11:58Well, it might stop you getting pneumonia.
12:01Just about.
12:03Can't even feel my feet.
12:05Oh, by the way.
12:05Sausages.
12:09Sausages?
12:10Present for Mr. Coop.
12:11What?
12:11Not done, Cooper.
12:12Oh, that old skimflint.
12:14Who will they all come to next?
12:17I thought it was very decent of him.
12:19A small gesture of his appreciation.
12:22For services rendered, no doubt.
12:24That's the sort of thing, yes.
12:26Well, if his wife made them, they won't be bad.
12:28Now, you get them things off and finish your tea.
12:31The water's up for once,
12:31so if you look sharp, you should have a hot bath before breakfast.
12:34I don't know what you're missing, Tristan.
12:42I don't want to know, thank you.
12:43Are you still there a present from Dan Cooper?
12:45Yes, a small token of his appreciation.
12:47A small token of my appreciation, Mr. Harriet.
12:49I really would appreciate hearing those words coming out of their face.
12:52Well, he didn't actually put it quite like that.
12:53Ah, ah.
12:54See, last week they killed a pig.
12:55Believe me, no pig was ever killed in better cause.
12:58And you're telling me that these sausages
12:59are a spontaneous reward for your excellent services?
13:03Well, aren't they?
13:03James, James, as a Scotsman,
13:05you have much to learn about the Yorkshireman.
13:07Now, sausages cost sixpence apart.
13:09So Dan gave you three, call it one and sixpence,
13:11much less, in fact, since it was his own pig,
13:12I know exactly the way that crafty buzzard line works.
13:16Generosity, alas, doesn't enter into it.
13:18He's calculating the long-term effects of this gift.
13:21What long-term effects?
13:23Decent fellow Dan Cooper.
13:24Those marvellous sausages.
13:26I know we'll knock a quid off his bill.
13:28That's how he thinks our minds work.
13:31Well, mine doesn't.
13:34Shame, isn't it?
13:38Thank God I will knock a quid off his bill.
13:42What are you on about now?
13:43That man has just given me an idea of astonishing brilliance,
13:46one that'll have far-reaching consequences for all of us.
13:49Well, didn't I think of it before?
13:51What is it?
13:51Pigs.
13:52Pigs?
13:52Pigs.
13:53What else?
13:54Even though it's tied at the bottom of the garden,
13:55there's a boiler in the yard for the swill,
13:57why should we spend good money at the groceries
13:59for our bacon and sausages when,
14:01with a small initial outplay,
14:03we can have our own for nothing?
14:04Well, it's certainly an idea.
14:05It's a rotten one.
14:07You're daft, Siegfried.
14:08Keeping pigs is a time-consuming operation.
14:10You don't know what you're taking on.
14:12I'm not taking anything on, dear brother.
14:14You are.
14:15What?
14:15Well, sure, I don't have to spell it out.
14:17After last night's performance,
14:18I've shown the most remarkable restraint.
14:19I seem to remember some passing reference
14:21to appearing at this breakfast table,
14:23bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
14:25You should see yourself as James and I see you now.
14:28The truth of the matter is,
14:29you're fast becoming a drunken, idle shirk-up.
14:32That's damn well not fair.
14:33I feed him water that ruddy mare of yours.
14:35Groomer, mucker out.
14:36It's hardly a labor of Hercules.
14:37Not even enough to keep you out of mischief.
14:40No, my dear brother, I have your interests at heart.
14:42I shall buy seven wieners and you shall be their swinehood.
14:45Save your breath to cool your porridge.
14:47My mind is made up.
14:48Seven's the perfect number.
14:49When the time comes, we'll sell six.
14:51Keep the seven for ourselves.
14:52I'll teach you how to slaughter it.
14:53If you can do a post-mortem,
14:54that's halfway to being a good butcher.
14:56That's the marvellous thing about a pig.
14:58You use everything.
14:59There is no wasted.
15:01Meat for roasting, bacon for curing,
15:03buckets of lard, gallons of blood for black puddings,
15:06trotters, chitterlings, bath chaps, brawn,
15:08and of course, you use the intestines for sausage skins.
15:10There's what it needs, you know, James.
15:14Are you interested in life?
15:16Or death, depending how it takes you.
15:18Oh, well.
15:20Oh, let the day unfold.
15:22Isn't it going to be a busy one?
15:24Why'd you say that?
15:25Well, I only thought you said last night that we...
15:27Oh, James, sometimes you just don't listen.
15:30It's the joy of our trade, though, isn't it?
15:33You simply never know.
15:34Things just build up out of the blue.
15:36You start by putting your feet up
15:37and you end up being rushed off them.
15:39Oh.
15:40What's your programme?
15:43I suppose I'd better have another crack at dense pig's ear.
15:45Good idea.
15:46You do that.
15:47It really needs two.
15:48Nonsense.
15:49Simple little thing like that.
15:50Yes, the job is.
15:51She's a vicious old monster.
15:53Oh, really?
15:53I didn't get that impression, still.
15:54You can't manage to learn and get dead to give your hand.
15:58Morning, Miss Harbuckle.
16:00Early on the scene.
16:00Morning.
16:01It's past nine, Mr Farnon.
16:03Hmm.
16:03I answered the phone as I came in.
16:06And?
16:06Mr Heaton out at Bronset.
16:08Dead sheep.
16:09He'd like a post-mortem.
16:10Is he still on the line?
16:11Yes.
16:12Tell him, will you, we'll be out in about half an hour.
16:16Very well.
16:17Thank you, Miss Harbuckle.
16:18We?
16:19Yes, I'd like you to come along.
16:21I gather they teach you blokes a pretty hot post-mortem procedure.
16:25I'd like to see you in action.
16:26Fine.
16:27Come on, him.
16:29What about dead sow?
16:32What the hell with dead sow?
16:34Come on, boys.
16:35What the hell are you doing upstairs?
16:36Come on, come on, come on.
16:36Come on, down, one of you.
16:40Where are you going?
16:50Heaton's is the other end of the village.
16:52Not Heaton's, James.
16:54Seaton's.
16:54No, Miss Harbottle said that we were going to...
16:56Seaton's.
16:57Seagfried, I promise you, Miss Harbottle...
16:58Look, James, Miss Harbottle delivered me a message.
17:00I'm not hard of hearing.
17:01She said Seaton's, clearly and distinctly, as I said just now.
17:04Sometimes you just don't listen.
17:18Say that, now.
17:20There.
17:21I didn't bring my PM knife.
17:22You got yours on you?
17:24Afraid not.
17:24No mine.
17:25No problem.
17:26Better lend us, honey.
17:29Here.
17:30Hello!
17:30Hello!
17:30Hello!
17:30Hello!
17:30Hello!
17:30Hello!
17:34Mr Farnham, what a nice surprise, Mr Herriot.
17:43I need a carving knife, please.
17:45A carving knife?
17:46Yes, Mrs Eaton, a carving knife, sort of a knife you carve meat with.
17:48A good sharp one, please.
17:49I'm sorry, yes, of course, Mr Farnham, just a minute.
17:54This is no damn good.
17:55It's got to be a really sharp one for this job, don't you see?
17:57It's not a best carver, Mr Farnham.
17:59I don't care what it is.
17:59Have you got a steal?
18:02Thank you, Mrs Eaton.
18:03Where's your husband?
18:04He's out.
18:05What?
18:06In the field somewhere.
18:07We just have to manage alone.
18:08Haven't got all day.
18:09Where's the sheep?
18:10Sheep?
18:11Mrs Seaton, I'm a very busy man.
18:15You've got a dead sheep.
18:16Your husband telephoned this morning.
18:17He wants a post-mortem.
18:18No, Mr Farnham.
18:19Yes, Mrs Seaton.
18:20But, Mr Farnham, we haven't got any sheep.
18:22Really?
18:23A castle.
18:24A few pigs.
18:26Poultry.
18:27No sheep.
18:28Ask Mr Herriot.
18:29Is this true, James?
18:32It was true when I came up a month ago.
18:34Are you fair to inform me?
18:36Mrs Seaton, we owe you an apology.
18:39I can't understand how this silly misunderstanding arose.
18:42I'm extremely sorry.
18:43Oh, it's nothing, Mr Farnham.
18:45I'm sure it's Mr Heaton who wants to see you.
18:47Two names like ours, we're always getting mixed up.
19:00James?
19:01Yes?
19:03You really have to be a bit more careful in future.
19:07That sort of thing.
19:08Not any embarrassing.
19:10Yeah, it's a bad impression.
19:17Oh, there you are, James.
19:34Mrs Pumphrey was on the telephone.
19:36She wants you to see her pig.
19:38Pig, Seafried.
19:39Don't be tiresome, James.
19:41She has a six-week-old pig.
19:43She wants it examined for siren.
19:46I suppose Tricky Woo's bottom's playing him up again.
19:48James, I'm not in the habit of repeating myself.
19:50However, pig, pig, pig.
19:53She has a pig.
19:55She wants it thoroughly vetted.
19:58Now, you know how I feel about these examinations.
20:00I'd not like you to skimp it in any way.
20:02If I were you, I should pay particular attention to its wind.
20:05Have it well galloped around the paddock
20:07before you get your stethoscope on it.
20:09And for goodness sake, don't miss anything obvious
20:11like curbs or ring bones.
20:12Take its height while you're at it.
20:14Can I have the measuring stick along?
20:16Yes.
20:17All right.
20:18Well, off you go and see it once, James.
20:20Oh, by the by.
20:21I saw Croxton.
20:23You can leave the Austin on your way back.
20:26What for?
20:27Engine needs a rebore.
20:30Using far too much oil.
20:32Look, I know that, Seafried. How did you know?
20:34You've been sending up smoke signals all over the countryside.
20:37Good night, James.
20:38Good night, James.
20:43Did you see how Mrs Pumphrey can ruin a pig's digestion?
20:54I thought Mr Farland was in here.
20:55He's just gone out, Mrs Hall.
20:56There's a gentleman come to see him.
20:58Would you show him in, please?
20:59Would you come in, please?
21:00Angela, you're the new vet, aren't you?
21:04Yes.
21:05I was hoping to see Seafried.
21:07I'm Richard Edmondson, by the way.
21:09James Herriot.
21:11I'm afraid Seafried's out on a call.
21:13Oh, pity.
21:14I wanted him to come and have a look at my mare.
21:16Well, I could come out this afternoon.
21:18Oh, thanks.
21:19I'd prefer Seafried to take a look at her.
21:21She's rather valuable.
21:23Oh, I see.
21:25Well, I'll leave...
21:26I'll leave Seafried a note.
21:31I have to be off, you see.
21:35Car keys, car keys...
21:38Is that old Austin yours now, is it?
21:41Yes, matter of fact it is.
21:42Seafried's given it to me.
21:44You'd better ask him to get you a new set of tires.
21:47Oh, you noticed.
21:48One day we could meet head-on in the country lane.
21:51Yes, I dare say we could.
21:53Oh, so long, old boy.
21:59Thanks for the tip.
22:10Well, what is your verdict, Mr. Herriot?
22:13You are the owner of a fine, healthy young piglet, Mrs. Pumphrey.
22:16Oh, what a wonderful relief.
22:18He's quite adorable, isn't he?
22:20Hmm.
22:21I decided to call him Nugent.
22:24Nugent?
22:25Yes, after my great-uncle Nugent.
22:27He was a little pink man with tiny eyes and a snubbed nose.
22:31The resemblance is quite startling.
22:34Really?
22:35How very interesting.
22:36Oh, Mr. Herriot, if you only knew how excited I am
22:39at having a pig of my very own.
22:41Yes, I can believe that, Mrs. Pumphrey.
22:43But what actually decided you?
22:44Oh, darling Tricky, of course.
22:46I worried so much about him being an only dog.
22:50And this seems a perfect solution.
22:52Well, it's certainly a solution.
22:54I'm sure they'll get on very well together.
22:56However, Mrs. Pumphrey, there is just one thing.
22:58What's that, Mr. Herriot?
23:00Nugent can't live in the house.
23:04You don't mean it.
23:05I'm afraid so.
23:06But that's a dreadful thing to say.
23:08He can't possibly live out of doors.
23:10He might catch pneumonia.
23:12As a matter of fact, he's more likely to catch pneumonia
23:14if he lives indoors.
23:15But, Mr. Herriot...
23:16I'm absolutely serious, Mrs. Pumphrey.
23:18If you can get a hot skin to build him a nice warm stye
23:20and a good long outside rum,
23:21I promise you he'll be much healthier and much happier.
23:24In that case...
23:28Well, Nugent, you heard what Uncle Herriot said.
23:32If it's a question of your health and happiness...
23:35Oh, don't.
23:37It's really naughty.
23:39It's for your own good, darling.
23:42We'll just have to do what he says.
23:45Do you think he'll get very much bigger?
23:54Yes.
24:21I see it off to a ch... Mr. Farnham? I must have a word with you.
24:51I'm a bit pressed for time Miss Harbottle.
24:55Naturally. When it comes to practical matters of business you always are.
25:00I don't wish to seem impertinent Mr. Farnham.
25:03As my employer I have a duty towards you.
25:06Now if I'm to bring any order out of this chaos don't go away Mr. Farnham.
25:11It's probably for you in any case.
25:17Mr. Farnham secretary speaking.
25:21Oh good morning Colonel Brent.
25:23I'm not in.
25:25Yes he is right beside me.
25:27Will you hold on a moment.
25:30Colonel Brent for you Mr. Farnham.
25:33Aye.
25:39Yes speaking.
25:42Yes of course I know which two are old.
25:45What do you mean it's gone lame again?
25:48You're telling me you've you've had that animal out on exercise.
25:51God damn and blasted man I gave the strictest instructions that leg was to be rested for at least two weeks.
25:57Well if you will employ a village idiot as your head lad that's your funeral not mine goodbye.
26:07Miss Harbottle if I say that I don't wish to speak to somebody.
26:10You said nothing of this sort Mr. Farnham.
26:13You said you were not here.
26:14I have no intention of lying on your behalf.
26:17Now will you kindly look at this.
26:19It's a perfect example of what I was talking about just now.
26:22Go on Mr. Farnham read it yourself.
26:24Go on Mr. Farnham read it yourself.
26:48By Jove James we're gonna slay those little teasers tonight. I'm just in the mood.
26:54How do I look?
26:55Fine.
27:04Christian!
27:05You can usefully do this job.
27:07A job now?
27:09Yeah certainly.
27:11Charlie Dent's pig's ear needs lancing.
27:13Go and do it now.
27:15You're out of your mind Siegfried.
27:17Are you questioning my orders?
27:18In this instance yes I know all about that ruddy pig.
27:21It's a killer.
27:22It's all so pitch dark.
27:23What am I supposed to do?
27:24Hold a torch in one hand and a lantern in the other while it disembowels me?
27:28Charlie Dent will give you a hand.
27:29He won't.
27:30It's Saturday evening.
27:31The whole family goes to the pictures every Saturday evening.
27:33Then you'll simply have to manage alone.
27:35I'll come for it.
27:36No you won't James.
27:36You won't do anything kind.
27:37It's your evening off besides simple little job like that.
27:39Tristan's deliberately exaggerating the difficulties.
27:44Oh all right.
27:45Be the boss if you want to.
27:47I'll just go and change the glad rags.
27:48No you won't.
27:50What?
27:51The case is urgent.
27:52Go now as you are.
27:54But this is my only decent suit.
27:56Yes I know it's a shame.
27:57That kind of thing is an occupational hazard in our profession.
28:21I don't get it.
28:49My god you poor old devil.
28:51yes bit of a state what never mind bodies can be washed and suits clean how's the
28:58dance oh I didn't go I wasn't in the mood somehow it's all Siegfried's fault
29:02where is he he's gone up to bed he's taking early calls it's a pity I'd like
29:07him to have seen me like this yes he'd know you tried tried my dear chap I
29:13succeeded you didn't I don't mind telling you it was pretty unnerving at
29:19first I got to the sty pitch dark there I was all alone nothing but that
29:26creature unseen grunting and growling on the other side of the wall I wasn't
29:31feeling a bit happy James I can imagine anyway finally I shone the torch on the
29:36creature's face it charged at the light roaring like a lion and showing all those
29:40dirty yellow teeth well I nearly wrapped it up and came home there and then but I
29:45got to thinking about the dance and all those dear little fresh-faced nurses
29:50anyway that was all it needed I was over the wall in a flash and flat on my back in
29:59that dreadful pig muck even quicker the torch had gone out I suppose she couldn't
30:03see enough to get a bite in when she charged I just heard this bark and felt
30:08this terrific weight against my legs as I went down it's a funny thing James I'm not a violent
30:15man but lying there all my fears vanished before I knew what I was doing I was on
30:21my feet booting her ass and that's what's so extraordinary she was a coward at heart
30:28she showed no fight at all good for you Tris oh yes gave my poor old battered ego the most
30:35tremendous boost but what about the ear I mean how did you open the hematoma there
30:39was no problem oh while I was chasing her she crashed into the wall thing burst
30:46itself it made a beautiful job
30:58morning Stephen Kipper's cooked in butter one of the more exquisite culinary fragrances
31:04the Austin needs a complete new set of tires
31:11and whose opinion Richard Edmonton Richard Edmonton what are you talking about you don't even know the
31:17man I do know I had a puncture on the way to Croxton's he virtually predicted it
31:20infernal nerve I think he's running some sort of road safety campaign in his paper
31:26definitely yes anyway he said it was dangerous driving the car with tires like
31:30that and asked me to pass the message on sort of so I have thank you that man's a
31:34menace getting much too big for his boots just because he owns a miserable local rag
31:37he thinks he can start chucking his way around new tires forsooth I'll give him new
31:41tires when I see him next I didn't take you in too greatly myself a condescending
31:45sort of chap I thought yes he is
31:46hasn't heard the last of this I can tell you morning Siegfried you're going to love
31:53this did you lance that ear oh it's no bother at all listen this is addressed to
31:59mr. Tristan Farnon it's not a squire mark you never mind dear mr. Farnon in view of
32:06your brother's unspeakable behavior I cannot bring myself to communicate with
32:11him directly the meaning of the word gentleman is one which is plainly unknown
32:15to him you'll be so good as to inform him that as of this date I am no longer in
32:20his employment yours truly Winifred Harbottle you've got a nerve Siegfried fancy goosing
32:26the Harbottle I find that you mark an extraordinary bad taste did you say do you mean she's not returning here it's fairly obvious isn't it oh what a beautiful morning
32:42James my boy it's a wonderful day
32:50oh
32:52well my brother's out on the job mr. Crump no I really couldn't say
33:08well our secretary's indisposed so I'm on duty here mr. Herriot could come
33:14right fine I'll tell him goodbye
33:18nothing you can't handle my boy Trump's mare touched Monday morning disease
33:24right I'll be off
33:26oh James yes Helen Alderson what about her well I've not been idle on your behalf in
33:32fact I've been putting out delicate inquiries oh you haven't oh calm yourself my second name is
33:38diplomacy I've come up with a very useful lead what is it you're a bit of a classical music
33:44addict aren't you mildly why so she she is a member of the Darabee music society and every
33:50Tuesday come rain or shine attends their evenings in the village hall you might do worse than become a
33:56member yourself thank you Tristan I am not ungrateful
34:05that's it mr. Crump in here oh thanks
34:20it's a right funny thing mr. Herriot if it happens at all it's always over a weekend
34:27that's why it's called Monday morning disease all right but why does it happen I don't think
34:33anybody knows for certain it's something to do with the suspension of normal work and exercise
34:37over a couple of days still at least we know how to cure it all right fomentation massage
34:43and possible exercise that's it no corn just bran back to normal in a couple of days
34:49thank you mr. Herriot would you like a drink of my wine
34:54well Albert Albert stop it mr. Herriot doesn't want any wine oh I wish you'd stop pestering people
35:04so him and his own made wine he's always looking for a victim I'm going down to the village now
35:11to see the school play I'll have to go we're late as it is come along children
35:16absolutely how about that drink mr. Crump you would you'd really like to try some I'd love to
35:27I haven't had my supper yet something to whet the appetite
35:30all right well come on sit down here make yourself comfortable mr. Herriot thank you
35:34great scott all your own work mr. Crump every drop of it all right now I think we'll start with the rhubarb
35:53hmm
35:59yes yes I see mr. Bamford well they're both out at the moment I was expecting mr. Herriot back some
36:05time ago wait a Jeff mr. Crump's place it's just down the road from you isn't it well it's worth a
36:12try and if he comes back here in the meantime I'll send him straight out right fine goodbye
36:23oh it's a good year for passing oh now then oh you must try the dandelion
36:43now
36:53how'd you find nothing hey very good excellent a bit sharpish maybe eh no
37:08I like a good dry white wine myself yeah mr. Crump
37:13I must congratulate you oh no
37:16oh no then you must you must you must try this one yeah
37:31you must you this one this one
37:37you must try this one
37:40this one in my opinion is comparable
37:55with a good morsel
37:59I made it last year and I'd very much appreciate if you told me what you think of it
38:04what you think of it you must try this one
38:06yeah
38:06yeah
38:15mr. Crump
38:18mr. Crump
38:19oh
38:20it's an option
38:21he's admitting he's still here
38:22oh just you keep on trying
38:24mr. Crump
38:25right
38:31oh
38:31hey
38:37it's bamford's up at holly bush cows on carving it's only just up there there
38:49call of duty
38:52I must be going
38:55many thanks
38:56hey it's raining it's it's it's raining like hell you're coming to know you can't go out like
39:04that here
39:04I know
39:06check this
39:09oh
39:14it's most thoughtful
39:26it's
39:36oh
39:38okay
39:39bye mr. Crump
39:40bye
39:40it's early
39:42yeah
39:47no
39:49eh
39:50Grrrr!
40:04Grrrr!
40:09Looks like a leg back.
40:12Big roomy cow.
40:15Shouldn't be difficult.
40:20Could you please bring me a bucket of hot water, some soap and a towel?
40:33Can I have a bucket of hot water?
40:38Some soup. Hand it down.
40:42Please!
40:50We will get it today.
40:52I'll put a lookin' in and have a bucket of hot water.
40:54All I want to do is have a bucket of hot water, some hot water.
40:58So, I should use hot water.
41:00We'll put a bucket of hot water, some hot water.
41:02We'll put the hot water in the hot water.
41:03Well, make it easy if we put a hot water.
41:06We're not ok yet.
41:07We're going to get a bucket of hot water.
41:09I'll put it in.
41:11I'll put it in there.
41:12Okay.
41:42Mmm.
42:12I'm going to put the red pepper in my mouth.
42:17I'll put these in my mouth.
42:21I'll put the pepper in my mouth.
42:26I'm going to put it in my mouth.
42:33I'm going to add the pepper in my mouth.
42:40Let's go.
43:10Let's go.
43:40There we are, gentlemen, a fine bull calf.
43:57Now, if you just drop him down with a few whiffs of straw and then pull it round for his mother to lick.
44:08Good morning, James.
44:14Good morning.
44:16Good Lord, why do you think you're walking like that?
44:19Nothing the matter with you, sir?
44:21No.
44:23There's a few glasses of Crump's wine last night.
44:26Thomas a bit upset.
44:27Crump's wine? Good grief, that stuff's lethal.
44:30Are you sure there's only a few glasses?
44:32Yes.
44:33Just a few.
44:34Wait a minute, Tristan, didn't you say that James delivered a calf at Bamford's after Crump's?
44:38Well, as a matter of fact...
44:39Did you, James?
44:40Have you come to mention it?
44:41Yes, I did.
44:42Okay.
44:43Um, successfully?
44:45Oh, yes, rather.
44:47Why?
44:49Well, just the Bamfords are strict Methodists, my boy.
44:52Grand chaps but dead nuts against drink.
44:54If they thought you were under the influence of alcohol, they wouldn't have any of us on the place again.
44:57They didn't notice anything, I think.
44:59Oh, heavens, no!
45:02Extraordinary idea.
45:03That's a good thing.
45:05And now, little brother, I have a treat in store for you.
45:14There you are, my boy.
45:16Seven beautiful, bouncing baby porkers.
45:19I'm a man of my word.
45:20They're all yours to feed and family.
45:22Thanks a million.
45:23And just what I've always wanted.
45:26Follow me, gentlemen.
45:34The boiler, Tristan.
45:39What about it?
45:40Neglected these many years.
45:42Clean it up and get it working again.
45:43Your new young charges are going to need all it can provide.
45:47Swill, Tristan, swill.
45:49From now on, no wastage in this house.
45:50Every potato skin and bacon rind is going to count.
45:53That's cannibalism.
45:54Possibly.
45:55I'm not unduly concerned.
45:56James, come with me.
45:57I want to talk to you.
46:08Are you sure you can manage, Mr. Herriot?
46:10Yes, thanks, Mrs. Crump.
46:11It is good of him to help with the washing up.
46:13Do you know, I've never known anybody so willing.
46:16It's all right.
46:17Oh, well then, I'll be getting back to the discussion.
46:21These musical society evenings are very interesting, don't you think?
46:24Yes, very.
46:30It is very good of you to help with the washing up.
46:32I hate washing up.
46:35Well, I'll wash and dry.
46:38Yeah, it's all right.
46:40It's all right.
46:47When did you decide to join the musical society?
46:50Just a few days ago.
46:51Someone tell me about it.
46:57So you like music?
46:59Very much.
47:15Would you like to leave this and go back to the discussion?
47:17Oh, no.
47:19This part's a bit boring.
47:30Did you get your car back all right after the flat tire?
47:33Oh, you heard.
47:34Yes, I heard.
47:36See, he's given me a complete new set of tires.
47:38Oh, splendid.
47:39And he's given me a rebore too.
47:41Suddenly I'm quite mobile again.
47:43First, a word about what kind of point he is.
47:46Well, I'll see you sometime.
47:47I'll see you sometime.
47:48If you like.
47:49See you sometime.
47:54If you like.
47:55Can I see you some time?
48:14If you like.
48:16Saturday evening?
48:19Yeah, it's all right.
48:25It's all right.
Recommended
45:52
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